Mystery Tire Tracks | Not For Radio #763 w/ Jay & Dunc

0:00Yamavap Resortant Casino at Sandman Well is bringing the biggest laughs to the stage. Break Taboos with Ali Wang on August 28th and 29th. Enjoy Ralph Barbosa's Dry Humor on September 18th and 19th. And don't miss Nikki Glazers on Apologetic Comedy November 19th. Tickets on sale now at Yamavap Theatre dot com. Only at Yamavap Resortant Casino celebrating its 40th anniversary. You in must be 21 to enter. Hi there. I am fully charged and here to tell you Toy Story 5 is now on Disney Plus. What? It's been too long, Cowboy. Woody Buzz and Jesse are back for a brand new adventure with some seriously cool new tech. What? Holy butter scotch! You said it, Jesse. So, save your batteries and watch the global phenomenon at home. And the best part, it's perfect for the whole family. Power up your movie night and watch Disney and Pixar's Toy Story 5 now streaming on Disney Plus rated PG.

1:00Not for radio with Jay and Dunk. Mmm, yummy. Happy bloody Thursdays. This is number A.A.A.A. Where you host, Duncan, Hi, Jay. Welcome on in. How are Snipers? I don't know. It feels like I haven't been here for ages for whatever reason. This week's gone fast and super slow at the same time and we'll get to that a little bit later because the Rock 2000, maybe on tomorrow's episode, but the Rock 2000 count down, the greatest 2000 rock songs over a million individual votes for this one, wraps up tomorrow in New Zealand at the biggest Indoor Arena Spark Arena. My old mate Bert over here gets to bring her home with her and he on the stage, final 20 songs in front of 7,000 screaming bugs. If you haven't already done so, you can stream it from wherever you are in the world on the Rover app. It's fucking good. It's a low V.A. It is an elite show that the team pulled together, the live set up, because it'll be worth recording. I don't know if you can, you can't get the band records which play after us.

2:02That costs way more money. But you can watch the actual show as it rolls out. It kicks off. People line up there about midday. They're doing 10 before fucking 10. Oh yeah. And then they give you a stream. Steam on it and heaps of cool ships going on. Free tattoos and barbring and food trucks and fucking comps and people hanging out and meeting greets and all the rest of it. It's all good stuff. Well we are inside the stadium. It's south on stage. Literally doing our radio show. Will people mosh, circle, puttin everything to the tracks? Yeah. And like, have you had a closure eyes and just picture a bunch of malated animals crossing the searing getty plain to the great migration. It's like the bogeon of version of that. Yeah. Just stumbling towards the arena. What? And into the honey hole. And that is exactly if you were lucky enough to go to the show on Liverpool and catch up. It's just a collection, a distillation of all the fucking greatest humans from the southern hemisphere that basically get together for this thing. People flying from Australia, people travel from all over the country and they arrive on

3:03mass. And they smash every single piss record that the arena has every year, year on year consistently since we've been here. And at the same time as they do in that, they continue to smash the record for the least amount of fucking trouble. So they do. Yeah. And I know this because when I made John Boy, he does fucking security there. Okay, we run it to every year. He's legend. He goes, mate, we had more shit at Miley Cyrus or fucking one of those pop stars. Like 10 times the amount of shit and they're only there from whatever, six to ten. These guys are there from midday till midnight in this fuck all happening. And they thunder pump piss. They just know how to handle themselves. It's not their first rodeo and the collection I would like to call, who's calling you? Hagen, hit buddy of mine, iston, the rap's on the new BYD's. Oh, that's exciting. Yeah. Oh, we've revealed it in a later date. Thanks to PYD and the new shark sucks out now. We've got a truck to go away to the NRL Grand Final. It gives that shortly.

4:03That's for the top brass. That's for people that subscribe. We sort of liken it to like, because we can't go to your local every month and have a beer with you. And we're probably bloody shut your beer as well if we could. But this is your way of shouting us a beer. And in return, we'll give you a double amount of episodes. Get it out free. Get the entire back catalog of Monday Tuesday episodes, including all of the inside words. And you get exclusive access to merch, like the hats, which are back on sale now. If you haven't got one of those, then fucking get your hands on one. And then obviously, if you're a sniper elite, you get to win the big prizes. Like the trip for two to the NRL Grand Final. Details on that in a couple of moments. If you like this out of already and you like stuff, I'm just going to press pause. And we might be the best eight bucks you've ever spent. You might be in and out after one month. That's what I do if I was poor. Just diving for one month and hopefully win. And it's $8 Kiwi too. So it's fucking 13 cents and any other currency. So just fucking pay. Click on the link. Just become sniper elite as the link and you'll take you through the Rover website.

5:04Not for radio with Jay and Dunk. Make contain traces of nuts. This episode of Not for Radio is brought to you by a classic builder. You can see these guys have been quietly building houses for Kiwis for over 30 years. Pretty much. If you put together the amount of time that me and Jay have been talking rubbish into microphones. Yeah. It's about 30 years between us and not. Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's made. It's a great nudged. They're great humans. They're great company as well. So this is the shortest large prize we've given away as far as the contesting element for this is literally two episodes. So you either hook a nail and you find the keywords on the Monday and Tuesday episode and enter for the trip to the NRL Grand Final Sydney, Australia Sunday, October 4th or you don't enter. Yeah. So like that. And we'll remind you on Saturday and Sunday, we'll remind you in tomorrow's episode. But if you're listening to this podcast for the first time, you're like, damn, they give away sick prizes. Normally we'll run them for a little bit longer, but this is a super short turnaround. We were hoping the warriors were going to be in the grand final.

6:06We came in a slightly hot on the Monday Tuesday episode. So for the sniper alert that we're listening to that, this is the actual package that we have to give away. Two of these, obviously we're going to include flight from anywhere on the globe in accommodation. So it's two silver tickets to the Premier's, the Grand Final, two passes to the pregame kickoff party and exclusive Grand Final trophy opportunity. I'm guessing you're going to get a photo with it. Yeah. That's one of those weird trophies that some decided to make you can't drink out of which I hate, but anyway, still looks cool and you've got to change profile pictures. I'm going to show in Facebook and whatever. And not to write it off, but when it was the Winfield Cup, the market was so much better. I've already told you that. So, mate, mark my words and I say this and I'm going to say it with a disclaimer that I understand that boost and cigarettes are not fucking great for you. Everybody knows this, but who the fuck is paying for all of your sporting events when you ban sickies and piss on them? You watch fast food places, mate. That's where my kids got drink bottles at the rugby club this year.

7:06Exactly. And how is that better than a fucking cigarette in a beer? So, fuck. I think four to support this. I'm going to be standing at the Sheraton Grand Hyde Park Sydney hotel, return flights for two. You'll be leaving. You'll be flying in on Saturday. The game's on Sunday. We'll fly out on the Monday. So you're going to need to clear your schedule. Real late. We're literally going to be calling the winner after the episode of Monday I believe and that's going to play on Tuesday's sniper lead episode. Yeah. I just know that hopefully you've won the trip on the Thursday person who's going to replay it. Back to the cigars and league thing if I can. Please. I specifically remember in the era of the early 90s of rugby league in Australia, there was a billboard in the corner of a game of means of sure mention this in the podcast before. And it wasn't enjoy yourself a Winfield cigarette after the match. It wasn't enjoy yourself a pack of Winfield cigarettes after it match. It wasn't even enjoy yourself a carton of Winfield cigarettes after the match. It had a whole tray and it said enjoy yourself a tray of Winfield's after the match to make

8:10it look like a tray of fucking beers, but it was sickies. And there was the biggest billboard in the ground. Winfield reads. I just I think. So thank you. I think what we have discovered and there is zero. There is zero health claims to there is nothing good. I don't think I mean, if there is hasn't been published and it would be completely, it'll be completely torn apart. There is no health benefits to smoking cigarettes. Things are going to your lung. It's meant to be oxygen and oxygen only basically. So that being said, there is no way that having high sugar, high salt, high fat food on a regular basis is good for your fucking body either. And there is no way that having, hey mate, why are you on the subject? Could you probably sum that whiskey look here? This one, the gun shot? Yeah, it's fucking tasty. Oh, it's a lot of ranting. So there is no way that drinking piss at a large volume is great for you either. But all that being said is everything in moderation. There you go.

9:10Everything in moderation. And I think that we kind of forget that. That's delicious. A party for things, Jay. And I think that we kind of forget that. And what happens is because there are so much tax and there is so much funding that goes on for people to get around these things. And you will quickly find that when that money disappears, that there is no fucking oatmeal company stepping up to the plate to pay for footy and for grandfine, it was a rugby league matches. And there is no lentil patty fucking fake meat company that's going to climb into it. And they're on their big white shiny fucking toeferky horse and rescue the sports from going under. And people are fucking kidding themselves. They think that they will. Now banning vapes would be the only one that could kind of claim a climate to say. And it was a fucking vape sponsor. So many vape sponsors they back in the day like when it first drops in New Zealand, the dance music like rhythm and vines had a vapour stage. And as you walked into it, they were handing out full like just the whole pack with everything that you need to start vaping. And just every single person that walked through this game was just, we got so much money

10:13from them at Georgia Femme. And do you know how much, how much, research and taxation, that was the fucking wild West and now they're getting shut, now they're slowly getting restricted and restricted and restricted. I know two individuals that were probably at the forefront of that industry and they are seven figure fucking humans and are only a couple years older than me. Do you know how many events in fucking sports send us, sponsoring? Donut. Fucking nothing. Well, here I am over here just trying to give way to the inner of the end point. I got a fucking rant like that. From old pro smoking J. Rivo there for fuck's sake. So if you want to go from anywhere in the globe to the NRL grand finals, get yourself a pack of darts and a fucking bottle of whiskey. Listen to the Monday and Tuesday episode. There will be a keyword in those episodes. You need to grab that keyword and you need to click on the episode description. There is going to be a competition like an entry page sign in there, whack the keyword

11:15and put your details in the drawer. So you've got two entries. Yes. Do you know what I thought would have been really good? And an entry so people that buy hats as well? I think we're going to be, yeah, I think we've got it next time. Yeah, we've got a couple of things. Obviously, we could put a golden ticket in a little stash pocket or one of the hats. If you don't have one, our hats don't have those, mate. I've made the sweat that for the license holders. Yeah, you put the red card holder. Tissue paper and at the stock there, four head sweating. Must be someone else's hat. I think that we obviously were beflamed by the seat of our pants and things are slowly coming together. We've been saying that for the best part of probably three years, but we're getting there, getting there slowly. I think you accelerate it. I didn't even just realize. You could be holding on for the life, aren't you? I just realized that people probably are wondering where that voice is coming from. Oh, Ben. No, I'm going to come on. I'm going to come on and play. Look, I talked to Tom, I'm a real boy. I was talking about, I was talking about, I was talking about Dunk Heddon Toe and Kammo just falling. Oh, sorry. Oh, Dunk Dynasty over there is fucking.

12:15Dock, have you guys seen, there's a full YouTube series called Cuck Dynasty? What, you just watched the people? Yeah, they've watched the watches. They've watched the people watching Duck Shooting. No, no, no, no, no, they've created a whole series based on Duck Dynasty. One hour, you know? Yeah, okay. They've done it very well. It's a very high quality product, very funny. I need Bitty Boy would know that, but anyway. You can find it on Bitty Boy's Instagram week. This is a slippery slope voice. Just straight out of the 40 bottle. Yeah, I just needed it to lubricate the pipes as we head into our first classic builders, classic yarn. This is the classic builders, classic yarn. Seamless. You go. Wait, I'm just going to tell you to make yourself a cup of tea because this one here is a David Longy. I'm talking, not quite JR Tolkien, but Benny's made it font size three and it's three pages. Okay. This is Srinbrine in South Africa. Up the Wars, fellas.

13:15How's it fellas? Brian here from South Africa because that's my fucking name. Hope you've enjoyed your legends are doing well. A few years ago, my self and the work made go on invited to a golf day up on the north coast of South Africa. Everything paid for a hotel food drinks comedy show. Lock stock the fucking lot. Absolute dream trip. We were pumped. The golf itself wasn't too bad. Had a few average shots. Lost a few bulls and drank way more than any two grown men probably should. After the round, we hit the showers, got changed, headed off to the comedy show. Now this is where things started getting dangerous. We ordered about five bottles of yoga for our table. I thought I was the yoga. This is only going one way. I mean, there's going to be a hard launch, but then the gravity is going to grab these guys real fast. That's so close. Not even like, hey, can I have a yoga readable just to spark things up? Five bottles of yoga. Real scenes later. Real movie. See, yet. Because apparently two idiots from Quazulu Natal thought that was a reasonable idea.

14:18The poor comedian got heckled mercilessly by my mate. Drinks were flying people were laughing security. Well, they got involved. And then nothing. Absolute blackout. No memories whatsoever. Next thing I know, I'm waking up in a hotel room at about four in the morning, absolutely busting for a piss. Swing on eggs off the bed, stand up and instantly collapse on the floor. Couldn't get up. At first, I thought I was just smashed, but something felt, well, seriously wrong. So I start shouting like a lunatic and wake my mate up. He asked me once when I feed drags me to the bathroom, even then I'm struggling. The weirdest part, he has absolutely no memory of the night either. Oh my god. My clothes are ripped to pieces. My entire body bruised and neither of us knows how we even got back to the hotel. So we gather our stuff and my mates is, bro, we're going to the hospital. I tell him, don't be a pussy. Let's go home. As we're leaving, we pass reception. The staff look horrified and one of them says, what the fuck happened to you?

15:19I asked what they mean. They tell us when we got back to the hotel, I'd been perfectly fine. Running around, chasing security guards, trying to force shots of yegan and their throats. Now this information completely breaks my brain because I can barely stand up. That anyway off we go. We stop at a garage where I smash six grand power powders and three monsters. What a grand power powders, I wonder. They'll be like an electrolyte. Yeah. Because apparently my medical strategy at the time was if it doesn't kill me, caffeine will. Then we begin the five hour drive home. My mate is panicking the whole way every 20 minutes. He's saying we need to go to hospital. We need to go to hospital. I say shut up and keep fucking driving. Eventually we decided to call one of the organizers of the event. The bloke answers, sounding surprised anyone as alive this early in the morning. What he told us next was absolutely unbelievable. Apparently, he and his wife found me lying in the parking area after everyone had left.

16:23My clothes were shredded. There were time marks all over. So hang on what, his phone rang. Is this what happened? How did this come back? He's run the bloke that organized it. In the bloke scheme, fuck I can't believe that you're alive. We found you're in the car park. We're in close shredded and time marks. Okay. It sounded like somebody had driven over me. Their plan was to take me to hospital. But as they got to the gate, they spotted my mate sitting in the car. Apparently I jumped out, sprinted to him, thanked them for the lift and climbed into the vehicle. They then followed us back to the hotel to make sure we got there safely, where I allegedly jumped out and started trying to get the security guards drunk. Again, at this point I'm sitting in the car, listening to the story about myself, like it's a documentary about somebody else. I don't remember a single fucking second of it. No phone, no idea where my belongings are, no clue who ran over me, nothing. Eventually we get back to my hometown and finally decided maybe hospital wasn't such a bad idea

17:26after all. The doctors sent me for scans. A short while later the doctor comes back looking very concerned. He asked what happened. I'll tell him honestly, I have no fucking idea. What's judging by his face sounded like the biggest lie that he'd ever heard. Then he starts reading the damage report. Here we go, we shopping list. Broken leg above the ankle, every rub on my left side broken, about half the ribs on my right side broken. One broken rubbed punctured my lung. My lung had collapsed. There was air trapped inside my chest, preventing it from expanding properly. So they'd tell me they're going to sedate me and insert a tube into my chest to release the trapped air. Ah, fuck it, no worries. Sounds pretty professional enough. Next thing I know, I'm waking up in absolute chaos. Doctors are running around, nurses are shouting, there's blood, fucking everywhere. Turns out it wasn't air. It was actually blood.

18:27So when the doctor inserted the tube, a massive amount of blood exploded out of my chest. Apparently everyone had a very exciting few moments that day. Not exactly the relaxing hospital visit that I'd hoped for. So after all the drama settles down and I'm lying in the hospital bed trying to figure out who attempted to turn me into a speed bump. I decided to call the venue. I asked them if they have any CCTV footage from the parking area. Sadly they don't, but they do have something else. A video from the end of the night. So they send it through. I open it and there I am. Stone cold naked walking through the dining room, doing the lilloup. That's when you walk on your hands and knees with your balls between your legs hanging out your house. For the last three people still awake watching this footage was like seeing evidence from another dimension. I had absolutely no recollection of any of it.

19:27To this day I have no fucking clue whether I was run over, fell under a vehicle, got hit by a golf cart or whether my mate accidentally drove over me. We have just agreed never to investigate it too deeply. After seven days in hospital that's honestly the conclusion that we came to. Maybe he drove over me, maybe he didn't. Wow, we'll never know. What I do know is I somehow survived and I got the fucking feels. I know I've got what feels like a reinforced rib cage. My mate and I are still great friends although I've noticed whenever we're drinking together he always got, he's always got one nervous eye on me especially if I'm driving and he's still standing outside the car. Anyway, anyway fellas no idea how I'm still here but I'm glad that I am. Love the show, keep up the great work and if anyone listening happened to run over a drunk bloke on the north ghost of South Africa a few years ago let us know.

20:28I'd love to fill in a few of the gaps in the old memory. Up the walls, up the savours. Wouldn't that be amazing if it wasn't his mate and then we actually linked up with the person. Someone's like this sounds like what you did bro and send some the episode. Yeah, it was 100% as well. Well, I don't think you can say 100 but I'm going to go 95. No, not even 1. Pretty up there. One of those searches where like I reckon I can jump the car bro. If you come at me at like 40k's I'll jump over the bonnet. Serious damage. I'm sorry, great to do that. Red Bull did it where they had a guy on a BMX biking up and he jumped over a formula loan car. Then he goes that's the scariest thing I've ever done in my life. Not bad hitting a formula loan car. It's kind of like a ramp anyway. Do that over a truck. We're like out of those rushes. He's the wreck. Threading the needle through a bus when they jump up and up in the back of a truck. Oh, so he was biking along and did the formula loan have an extra ramp put on it or something? No, no, no. He went off like a little kicker ramp and then the formula loan car just took the ramp out. Yeah. That's what I thought.

21:29Perfect lead. There was that guy that was making it famous for a while jumping over cars. Yeah. Famous. We're seeing it famous till you're not. Yeah, we're seeing it now. He's riding letters to fucking not for radio. Well, that's a spicy one. Drink responsibly. Blah blah blah. 2020 six. You're an adult. Hopefully. Okay, so this next but here I have no idea why but I was I was watching this Hold hold hold. I was watching this. I just want you to have a look at it and just soak up the video and then we'll put the view of you watching this you can you can see it otherwise we'll go through it after the video. Basically long story short this bloke who played footy lost his ball when he was a kid and his mrs. found it and gave him his first ever rugby ball and it fucking buckled me for whatever reason it just absolutely made me fall apart when I saw it this morning. Yeah. Because nobody understands that feeling of having their first ever Gilbert and then having

22:30it put back in their hands when they thought it was gone like it I don't get it rattled me. I see. I don't think and we'll keep this in there's a little bit of an issue with the copyright of the video on the all put a link in the show. Don't you get more to the video? Yeah, it's so so beautiful. I don't think that will ever happen again because we live in such a disposable society like I think now between my three boys I legitimately would have put in the play rugby for one season I legitimately would have put in more than five rugby balls. Yeah, but you did have you got them a Gilbert? Yeah, they've got Gilbert's. Yeah, they do the rebel sport Gilbert's which are like 27 bucks. So this is the era but yes and I remember you would have had a fucking a varo plastic piece of shit that hurt your foot like fuck all one of those leather anti-dass ones whenever it got wet with so heavy you couldn't kick it. So at the 1999 World Cup do you remember the ball that was there? Yeah, which is the was a web Alice ball. Yeah, and I think Adidas did it. Yeah, and it had blue ends on it. Yeah, and I remember seeing my mate Gareth who we Lee,

23:32so I went to primary school with him but randomly didn't talk to him for like 15 years in upflating with the back and all these fucking hell will add. Ended up marrying this French bird and listens to the podcast from over in France now and full speak it is bizarre. So I stole my mate. But he's happy as hell. He turned up to rugby practice one day with one and I was like holy fuck that then was like a hundred and twenty dollar ball. Yeah, it'd be like turning up to random rugby practice now with a three hundred dollar rugby ball. Yeah, and I didn't even want to touch it. It was fucking that awesome anacquact so much better. Yeah, and this was still in the era when there would be the odd leather ball floating around at someone's house and you'd get wet and it'd be like kicking a bucket full of cement. That was so rough. And you'd try and catch it would be like a bar or so. But yeah, it could in comparison to that. Yeah, I remember I remember those early days of getting a ball and there's nothing quite and it goes for any sport. Like basketball's another one. Yeah, fresh basketball.

24:34There's nothing like that on the hands-a. You leave out the sun for one that's fucking nearby another one. Yeah, there's so it's basically this the the clips from Hayes Happenings, a couple and Devon was the bloke. I think this bloke was the guy that was actually the one that got the fucking ball anyway. And Jess Eiffel just came up in like a random feed part today and I was watching and I was like and it instantly made a trend sports you. Those moments like you have those those pieces that have huge significance to you as a kid. That mean nothing to your parents? Yeah, and that's kind of like you never know those. What those moments are going to be? Yeah, it could be it could have been like a like a cuddly toy or a favorite garment or whatever it was. Like I remember growing out of like my favorite jersey and I was fucking gutted and I was like please could you just make could you just find a bigger one of this? And I just like no that's what this is how you know that you're becoming a big kid is that

25:35you leave all these things behind like all these like I was having a chat to a friend of mine who she's got two boys and they're getting old and I was like you get to go through these cycles you get to go through them three times all the first all the lasts for my boys. Yeah, that's the first that first and last for me and my wife as well. So that like we don't get to see like I mean their first game of rugby with their first game of football their first game of anything their first everything is when it's done it's done. There's and there's way more weight on that like I probably nothing after. You just sort of in the weeds when you've got three young kids to the first one the shit just hit me not really paying attention second time you clock it a bit more third time you really savor it. Yeah like even the little things like in that video I check up my Instagram of going to rugby with the boys just sitting on them both all on the tailgate doing up their rugby boots you know. Yeah and it's it's weird not to make it a full parenting chat but like I talked about last summer osky is way cleaner on surf and then hunter is and I was pushing him into

26:38waves and they've all got their fuck I've got that many boards they just basically go that's my board and so they've got this board that's a shorter board that they've been surfing and it's because it's a shorter board it's a little harder to get into waves so I've been throwing them into waves for a couple of summers and so now he's paddling and we'll paddle for the same waves this is this is niggly this is a surface dilemma as you always want to go surfing with your kids but then you pollute the lineup with your own fucking semen and they're stealing all your waves which is niggly and you obviously get excited about it but when you are growing up as a surfing father and if you don't understand you I mean if you don't surf you won't get this but you spend the whole time when the waves are good pushing your kids in and then when they get tired that's when you go surfing and they generally get tired when it goes to shit blows out bank shifts tide drops whatever it is and so now that I can surf at the same time with them when it's good now it's competitive sort of set up but I was I'll paddle alongside next to oskey and I'll throw him in at the last minute he goes don't push me into waves and I'm like okay and I let him go and I watch him take off and stand up on this wave and charge on this wave and paddle out with big smallness face and I was like

27:41you don't get to say when I fucking stop pushing you I'm not pushing you into waves to you I'm pushing you into waves for me and I'm fucking not stopping now oh there's no come a time we won't be able to they'll be pissed off at you they'll turn around they'll rip the things that you'll never be able to do that again that's maybe clock the fact that that's one of the things I've missed from summer I get fucking that pump I'm putting the boys on the way yeah like I fall into full char how we know yeah it's the best it really is and did you see I have one of those moments this morning you go you don't know what's like gonna stick when you like because you know you have thousands of moments when you're growing up it's a kettle whatever when we're down this morning might as well been at me for a while wanted to play football for school and so we went down to the like football grounds and I've just been telling them about the machine that you use on your lawns to make the drainage better we call them out yeah and anyway they've just done that to the whole fair I was like see here's the so those guys are still working they just for turned up and they've done day number two to finish off the thing I didn't realize how it works so they call it and then they mow it really low and they pick up all the

28:43pieces that are being called out yeah and so that's how they're doing it and they were running quite close to where we were shooting with the football goal and I and he keep making me go back further so I was doing bigger and bigger kickstorm and he just wanted them fucking basically hissing in it max checkers and just wanted to dive in front of them to be goalie and just fucking wear the face from what I gather so that's what I try to do and then I tow hacked one and it went sideways and it went in front of the core of the tractor they had the core on the back of it and I was like oh and he's like oh and then a just rolled passes the thing we've passed the mediator the side of both me and him we're like yeah and that might be one of those moments you know we're like move that time the tractor was mo my favorite ball we were just fucking cheer it yeah yeah it's those it's because you forget because we never ever really spend any time looking back particularly you get to a certain age when the things just start to run and you're like it's next in front next in front next in front what's like what's behind and sometimes it's just better to stop and to turn around and to look back and and and even with a cool shit like we've got a friend of mine I said on the

29:47other side of the glass Lauren just just joined the business and some of my fucking favorite moments were hanging out with her 20-odd years ago and I get to see her face and instantly it's like a time machine because she's fucking she looks exactly the same I've been fucking 40 years older but it's like there was those cool memories particularly in the beginning when we were starting at an interview and it was the fucking wild west and there was kids running the business like but not looking at a million's of millions of dollars and it was wild and it was just there was fucking h-shotted and even exist where the best bosses it was chaotic and then you go back even further for things like I remember in Taranaki like I was just talking to a mate of my mother's Simmons who owns Simmons or he's running Simmons contract in a big business down in Taranaki and we used to all be on the same road and we'd go ealing together and he was so big when we were ealing so I'm under five at this age and so we'd go down there with our dads and then we'd fire burning in the background and the boys would be having the dads we have some tins and us kids

30:47because there were too many of us to be handled by the fathers they'd get a fucking fencing standard and jam it between our legs and we had to cross our legs around it and hold the fucking line over around the back of the standard in case we got fucking pulled into the river by these eels haha and you'd say like I remember it vividly like I love that stuff like it is it is about those core memories and geez we we have a red hot crack in our twenties it delete most of our brain cells but those you know I find the whole thing funny when you like where there was some photo albums out at home the other day and we're looking having a bit of a flick through them it's very hard to decide for what actual memories and what memories you've made up off of a photograph to our man well I am forever in the flux between did that happen to me did I hear it did I hear parts of it and make it up or did I hear it on the show or have I heard it from somebody else because I just spend so much time just just gliding through different shapes of stories and

31:49you know different you know like yeah I have weirdly lucid dreams like crazy dreams and so I don't know if I've dreamt it all made it up most of time almost like there will be an element to truth in everything but whether it's mine or somebody else the fuck I couldn't tell you this when J tells you you're talking to me starts telling you one of your stories you're normally pretty going to clock it a half way through but you know what any lucky any good story even when we've repeated couple of the wall stories on this podcast yeah just backing admin um clear cool eras um I still hits good stories a good story I'm gonna make Andy they can are in some of his yarns I've heard 12 15 times and I am fucking there for every second of the story when he retails him and I'll be there every time he wants to tell that story because a good fucking story is a good story with our very good friend Tilly who is he is he knows how to get he knows how to push my buttons and he loves yeah so he is fueled by Duncan Hyde's laugh and so he just goes mining for it for the whole weekend

32:53and opening weekend of ducks he is crack so he finds the vein and he taps into it like it's hilarious just like his stuff is same there'll be an element of truth but fucking wildly made up stuff like he would be he would make it probably his own podcast and it'll be a great lesson if you got him in that zone because it's hilarious watching him go yeah yeah he was talking about he was talking about running his sex toy of a pto unit off a tractor and his draw oh no it was a scop bump and he'll explain to the missus quite purchase a 340 thousand dollar John Deere to run his cock bump yeah so they do they do they do get out of here oh shit yeah snipe us read out another war story incoming eyes on all the scope style did let's see who hits the mark please 20k from the closest farm

33:56right this is another one from South Africa this from Steven South Africa a long time ago I was a proper gen X type growing up in rural South Africa where my best mates bachelor party as we were in our early 20s before Google mobile phones or internet could record the shit we got up to back then his fiance knew what we used to get up to when we're on the source brandy of course course was a clip clip in clip in club club clip in clip in climb clip in the club and they smash it fuck they drink some of that and insist that we have his bachelor party at least one week before the wednesdays jude not long enough normally the night of debauchery and drinking was to follow as we got to the first bar we duct tape a pint glass to each of his hands and a massive dildo towards 40 he was walking around the club and everyone was pouring a little bit of water they were drinking into his glass and he just had to try and keep up all night after a few hours we chased him down the main road buck naker with about 15 guys chasing him with paintball rifles firing at him he ran out of steam after about 10 minutes and all the fresh

34:59year hit him in all the alcohol he consumed hit him at the same time and he just straight passed out this is where every thing took a turn for the worse a friend of mine was training to become a nurse so we decided to put a full body cast on him and load him into an overnight train after midnight oh my gosh that is such a hectic setup for a stay we put his bank card down by the front of it by his chest and left in there as he thought it would be a funny prank to play we all ended up going home in the early hours and didn't think much of him woke up mid morning with massive fucking hangovers his fiance didn't think much of him not coming home as she thought he'd be sleeping off on one of the couches or something we started to receive frantic phone calls the next evening she hadn't heard from him and no one knew where he was about 36 to 40 hours like I killed a phone call from him

36:01in South Africa like there are places you could do that South Africa would be fucking pretty near the bottom of the list for me I click I get a collect phone call from him as we didn't work up he thought he was in a very bad accident and couldn't move but didn't understand why he wasn't in a hospital when the people were talking to funny talking to him funny around him turns out he crossed the fucking border into the next country well passed out and was removed from the train is he didn't have money or a ticket where he was trapping with no passport or identification either it took us flying and and explaining to authorities that it was a joke on slightly a ride and that we have as passport and a willing to pay the penalties to get him deported back home when he made it back the day before the wedding when he made it back the day before the wedding and tempers were frayed not going to lie about that we were all banned from the wedding until an hour so before the ceremony and fear at one point there would be no fucking wedding at all anyway all's well it ends well

37:05in the end and we're in a good laugh afterwards but be warned for future bachelor parties that's up there that is well done that's an elite yarn and that's an elite yarn right up nothing not the word encourage people to try and top it but she's that's good going that's up there for like um just I haven't heard of anything remotely close to that like bachelor party but there's lots of bachelor party it's amazing we don't know we strapped a doughnut on the helmet for our mates bachelor party made a mottet shirt that said free unicorn rights they took them all around the city I bet it didn't get many all right it'll do for the podcast how are not the radio uh once again thanks for our sponsors classic builders making an easy army being thanks mate they've got a national they've got national scale but it's still local builders doing the Mahi house and land a design and build first home or free behind I've probably done it before and they can help we figured out have a great rest your Thursday big old bloody day for us at the rock smoke with the old radio station we'll climb into that another reminder become sniper

38:09elite join the top brass get the all the extra episodes um get them ad free get first crack at all the merchant stuff and get yourself the mixer for the NRL grand final package four two you and you best mate three nights accommodation Sydney uh not this coming weekend following weekend from anywhere on the planet we've got your back it's gonna be a hell of a turnaround you might be traveling for for more time than you're on the ground yes who we could extend it as well we'll deal with that once you win yeah so we'll literally you've only got tomorrow as another reminder and you've got to listen to the Monday Tuesday for those keywords and then we're calling the winner on Monday yeah so real short turnaround and this one we want maximum amount of entries get yourself the mixer that's what it's all about have a great rest of your day go well go long and have the mother here come on you've been listening to Jane Dunks not for radio podcast thanks for listening I hope to see you soon