Guarding childhood in an age of confusion

0:00It's Six Eastern, three o'clock Pacific, from coast to coast and around the world. It's anybody paying attention from America out loud talk radio. I'll have black and white evidence that the FBI interfered in the 2016 election. It's time for The Truth Be Told with Booker Scott. First of all, let me welcome you into the program here on a Tuesday night and let you know that right off the bat, this is going to be a little bit different hour here tonight. Sure, there are a lot of political things happening in our country and some parts of the world they seem to be on fire right now. But one thing I say quite a bit and I think it's true, our biggest battle that we find ourselves in right now is probably one for hearts and minds. I believe we try too hard to find political or legislative solutions for the ailments

1:01of our souls. One subject I've dealt with quite a bit here on this program is the LGBTQIA plus plus and I think they've added an S in there now in that community. In child sex trafficking and human trafficking, I've dealt with all of those subjects. How could we not right now when you take a look at culture and society? We hear the stories of children being taken from parents to be transitioned to the opposite sex. Parents' rights are being taken away over the state and the state being able to transition those children without the parents' consent. If you're like me, you probably think all of this has gone a little bit too far at this point. We started with a few drag queen story times and the next thing you know, a 13-year-old girl, has been taken from her parents in Montana to cross a state line where the laws make

2:04it easier for that child to transition to the opposite sex. The next time those parents see their daughter, it's their son. And I don't know about you, but I want to learn more about that life because I just don't understand it. What makes a person feel that they're someone that they aren't and feel it so strong that they go through extensive medical procedures and life-changing medication to achieve what? Exactly what have they achieved when it's all done? I'm not sure, but I'm willing to learn and I know I would like to know more. As someone who sees the world through a biblical lens, this one's a tough one for me to understand. But one thing that's easy for me to understand as a believer, as a Christian, that's compassion. At this moment, in our Sodom and Gomorrah history of the 21st century, compassion and

3:09empathy may be our best tactic for converting those hearts and minds. I'm Booker Scott and this is The Truth Be Told on America Out Loud Talk Radio. This hour is brought to you by shareright.org forward slash booker. Open enrollment is coming soon and that means you're going to have to make some choices about your health care. And I really encourage you to go to shareright.org forward slash booker and find out more about health care done the right way. Plus it's going to save you 30 to 50 percent at shareright.org forward slash booker. In this hour, we're about to welcome a man to the show so that he can share his journey from a boy to a man to husband and father to a woman for 30 years and back to a man and how that happened. Was it divine intervention or did it have to do with him digging into Scripture? Listening to sermons going to church as a woman so that the Holy Spirit could change

4:15his heart. He's written his story in a new book. It's called Not Man Enough to be a woman, transgendered for 30 years. No lie lives forever. His name is William Allen and William, thanks so much for coming and spending this time with us and sharing your story with us so that we have a better understanding of what this is all about. Booker, it's good to be with you buddy. Thank you. You know, one place to start here is where I first came to know you and that was in a sermon that Pastor Willie Rice, Dr. Willie Rice at Calvary Church did. And when was that? Was that in back in May? That was May 19th. May 19th, you know exactly. So here's that sermon, a clip from that sermon. This is when I became aware that you existed. So let's listen to this clip here with Dr. Willie Rice at Calvary Church. I got a letter the other day, kind of surprised me.

5:16It was from a person named Maggie. Maggie had written me a couple of times in the past, so it took me a moment, but I remember getting emails from Maggie and apparently Maggie said I'd even called her to answer a question. And more than that, Maggie had moved to Clearwater a few years ago and said I've been coming to your church and a few years ago I came to be baptized. You baptized me as Maggie. You didn't know any better. But I'm not Maggie. She said in 1961 when I was born, I was born a male. My name is William. And I lied to you and I've been lying to a lot of people, including myself. William said for 30 years, I've lived as a woman. I can't explain it. I don't understand it. I got married as a young man. It was a happy marriage, a good woman and I suppressed that desire and then it came back

6:18and it ruined my marriage. It cost me my family. I was estranged with my parents. But I'd settled down to a mostly comfortable life and almost nobody knew. You didn't know. I know you didn't know and I thought I was a Christian even. Told people I'd ask Jesus into my heart but the truth is I never loved to read the Bible. I never had a thirst for the things of God. A couple years ago she said I was listening to you preach and something began to happen in my heart. I began to feel the Holy Spirit stirring and convicting me. I began to watch a lot of it online but there were videos and I went back and watched all the videos they had stored up in the archives and the website and then I started listening to other preachers and fortunately Maggie was listening to really solid Bible preachers. She listened to them. I mean some strong ones. And I began to listen to those and they made me mad at first.

7:19But the more I began to listen, the more I knew they were telling me the truth. And I began to hunger to know God and I knew I needed to repent. Maggie said the day came when as I began to listen and think about all that had happened in my life I realized I needed to repent and turn to God that I'd never been saved. Maggie wrote me this letter and said I started to see all the people that I had to see does a pretend woman and I saw the relationships with them as false and undeserved. I'm reading the letter Maggie sent me. I don't have time to read it all. In fact later on maybe we'll find a way to communicate because it's so much in this story. Maggie said I grew more and more disheartened with my own lifestyle. I saw my lifestyle for what it was. I saw my sin for what it was. I broke down crying. I mean ugly crying because I knew what a vile person I'd been all my life.

8:23My desires no longer mattered. I cried out to God confessing my sins and who I was. Now I knew I needed a savior. I repented and asked for forgiveness. I turned away from it all. I wanted to be pleasing in his eyes. I wanted to put it all on Jesus and I gave up my life to him whatever required. A level of peace that I have never experienced came over me. Suddenly nothing in the world mattered any longer, at least not like what Jesus had done for me. I now love reading and studying the Bible. I pray a lot. I love talking to others about Christ and I take any opportunity to present the gospel. The Holy Spirit is living in me and is changing me and that's when I knew I wanted to fully repent. The transition, I wanted to glorify God. Maggie, not Maggie anymore, it's William, had to go through surgeries which people don't want to do.

9:24They want to do the other kind that they don't know with this kind. I had to go through surgeries. Some things can never be undone but I changed my social security. I had to go through all the legal processes. I had to go back through it all. But I was determined that I would repent and I would find who God really made me to be. And then William, and it's a personal letter but I asked William, is it okay if I read that? He said it is. I said, okay if I use your name, I don't have to. He said, no, no, I want you to. I'm writing a book. I'm going to tell my story. This has been a long time coming. William said this. Will you forgive me first of all because I didn't take who it really was. I said, will of course. And then William said, I know this is a sensitive question. Would you baptize me as William, your brother in Christ? Because now I've been saved. And I want to apologize.

10:25So tonight, out at the beach, William's going to get baptized as somebody who wants to apologize. And here's what I want to say. I don't know what your story is. But we have all messed up. We've all believed lies the time or two about ourselves, about others. And that's all an idol is. It's a lie. You believe some lies about who you are. And William, I remember that sermon like it was yesterday. And I'm sure that you probably do too. I know at the end of it, I had tears in my eyes. And on that night when you got baptized at the beach, I made sure that I drove out to the beach that night to support you in getting baptized. And you didn't know I was there. You didn't care. But I wanted to be there for that moment. Because I was moved by your story. Because we need so many more stories like yours.

11:28And let's tell your story. We heard a lot there from Pastor Willie. But let's fill in some of the blanks that he didn't get into. And as we go and look at your story, let's go back to being a child. When was it that you first failed in some way that maybe you were supposed to be a girl instead of a boy? When was that? Well, I want to clarify something. Because a lot of people, especially today, you hear people saying, I identify as a girl or a woman, or I'm used to hear the old, I feel like a woman trapped in a man's body. I'm really the other gender or the other sex. I never felt that. I want to differentiate this from the earliest time in my life that I can remember. I simply wanted to be a girl.

12:30I wished I had been born a girl. I can't explain. And this is back around age four or five, far back as I can remember. At the time, I, you know, at that age, I understood there were differences between boys and girls. I knew my dad was a male. I knew my mom was a female. And I wanted to be a female. I had a lot of cousins, I had boy cousins and girl cousins. I knew I was a boy, but I wanted to be a girl. I can't say that I felt like a girl. I just wished I had been. I don't know why. And at that age, too, I certainly wasn't aware of all the biological differences, of course. But with whatever information I had at the time, for some reason, I wanted to be a girl rather than a boy.

13:30Yeah, from four or five years old, you felt that inside of you that you didn't feel like a girl. You didn't feel like you were a girl. You knew the difference, but you wanted to be a girl. And is that gender dysphoria? What exactly is that? Is there a term for it? When I had gotten a little bit, quite a bit older, I can in my 20s. Eventually, I, you know, was seeing psychologists. And the diagnosis they had back then was called gender identity disorder. Today, it's called gender dysphoria. And gender identity disorder was listed as a mental disorder. In the DSM 3, the diagnostics statistics manual. And this is what the psychiatrist used for differentiating between all the different mental disorders and treatments and such. Today, in the DSM 5, it's called gender dysphoria. And it, it's not so much listed as a mental disorder, and it focuses more on the person's identity.

14:33And so I think to a degree, even the DSM has gone woke. Yeah. Because they've even changed certain designations like, you know, when we're born, we're male or female. That's right. There's a choice of two. Right. Yeah. They've changed those words now to gender assigned at birth. You know, male assigned at birth or female assigned at birth. It leaves it open. Right. They leave it open, don't they? Yeah. So that it can be changed easily later on. Yeah. So as a young man, you get married, you get married as a young man. And, you know, that you're in a marriage and eventually, somewhere along the way, you decide to become a woman. And what was that like at that point in your life? What was going on with you mental? Become a woman as much as anyone can. Yeah. You know, in reality, that just can't happen.

15:33You know, and I got to say, I see people today that are doing these things, and it just really bugs me. And I look at them sometimes thinking, man, these guys are cheap or weird. You know, why in the world would they want it? And then all of a sudden, I come back and I wait and hold on. Yeah. I did that. Yeah. Did you consider yourself ever weird? Or did you perceive that people thought that you were weird? Oh, of course. Yeah. From from day one, I knew I was weird, and I knew I had to hide it as a child even. Because I, I mean, there's no, I knew whatever it was that I was feeling. And you know, I had dress up time and, and all that. I acted out. I knew that. There was something telling me that was wrong. And, and I hid it. And I dealt with it the best I could. And growing up, I, it's not like I was playing with barbies or anything like that. I was doing all the boy stuff. And, um, but I,

16:33in secret, I would, I would have my own dress up time, pretend time. Yeah. William, were you, were you raised in a family of church goers? Did a church goers? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So, I can't necessarily say that my parents were Christians. It's, it's hard for me to know that for sure. But we did go to church. And, I was raised in the, in the Methodist church. Okay. Do you feel like any of those things that popped in your mind like this is wrong? Did that come from your early indoctrination in church? Or did that come from your parents? Or was that something just within you that says, hey, I'm a little boy, but I want to be a girl. And this isn't right. Where does that come from? In a kid that's, I think it was just, I think it was just something internal. It was just something I, inherently knew wasn't right. And, and because I knew I had to hide it, that was one reason I knew that it wasn't right.

17:34And, I don't think it was because of any message I got from church or because of anything, any documentation from my own parents, right? Because they didn't know about it. Yeah, you were, you were playing dress up and hiding it from them. Yeah, because, because you felt inside that it was wrong. And because, and, and because of that, you hid what you were doing. Yeah. So I get that. So take us, take us, yeah, take us on to your marriage and then, you know, the transition into becoming Maggie. Where does that start? Where does, how does that happen? Right, right. Well, yeah, that whole thing dog me for most of my life and, and, and to early adulthood. I'm getting through, university. It was difficult. And, because it was just on my mind all the time. This, this thing. And, you know, if you knew, had known me before, you never would have guessed that I would ever do something like that. I mean, I was not a feminine. And, I was a gay.

18:34You were a masculine man, and you're not gay. Yeah. You're still not gay, are you? See, that's, that's something someone like me needs to understand. Because, you know, we just don't know. We don't know what any of this means. There are so many variations. We just, we just wanted to stop. You know, we just wanted to stop. And, in fact, we're up against a break, so we're going to come right back and continue this conversation. We're talking to William Allen. He transitioned as a young man to a woman, where he stayed for 30 years. And, you just heard his story there from Pastor Willie. We're going to continue with his story here in just a minute. More, The Truth Be Told with Booker Scott in Minutes, on America Out Loud. America Out Loud. Hey, we're calling all patriots to Nashville, Tennessee, July 2nd, 3rd, and 4th, for a powerful celebration

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21:36Dot News and see all the great content there. Additional podcast that you do not hear on America Loud Talk Radio. I'm Booker Scott. We're being joined tonight by an author now who just wrote a book. I'm going to give you information about how you can find that book a little bit later. William, let's get back into the conversation. When we went to the break there, I was trying to get you to start talking about the transition. You were married and at that point in your life, you decided to go ahead and go through that. And as William mentioned in the sermon there, you heard a lot of people and you admit that you heard a lot of people. I have to imagine that your wife was a casualty in this. Oh, yeah. A lot of people were my father, my mother, a lot of people were. Yeah. I had been dealing with the situation and really, once I had moved out to the sift northwest where I had a job after university, I started actually explore this a lot more. I had a lot of people where my father, my mother, a lot of people were. Yeah. I had been dealing with the situation and really, once I had moved out to the sift to explore this aren a lot more and found

22:36out that there are other people like me. I didn't know that most of my life. And that was a huge relief. And finding them and kind of opened up the possibilities. It opened up some exploration on my I was doing that one day out of the blue, I met a girl and we hit it off and it was one of those things where we each knew that we had just met the person where we were going to marry and several months later we were married. And the greatest thing was that when this happened, all those desires that I had, they went away. They're gone. I thought I was cured. Yeah, so you became cured for a moment in time there when you find the person that will be your wife, was that a relief to you? Oh, yes, absolutely. And at the time too, I had always thought I was Christian, like I said, I was raised up

23:36in the church and there were key moments in my life and where I kind of realized, maybe that wasn't saved. And I did some soul searching and said a prayer, you know, one that's often called the sinner's prayer. And, hey, I'm saved now for real this time and I've got to tell you, I've been saved four or five times. It only takes one, so it only takes one good one. It only takes one good one good one. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, I got married for a while, for a year and a half or so, it was just fantastic marriage. We were hitting it off. We were just doing great. And after about a year and a half, two years, my old nemesis came back and with a vengeance, it was kind of like, it was an entity and it hadn't gotten any attention for the past couple of years. And so, you know, it really took a prominent position in my mind and my life.

24:37And I got to the point where I just couldn't deal with that anymore. And there came a point where I had to confide in my wife and told her what was going on. So, I thought I'd had it lit, but I didn't, obviously. And how did that go? I'm curious how that conversation went. Not well. Oh, yeah. Yeah. She was a garbage woman. She, just the real, you know, stereotypical, girl-a-girl and she wanted that role. She wanted to raise children and she had $10 under her whole future on me. And man, I just, it was just awful that, you know, what I did. But dealing with what I was dealing with, there was just no way that we could go on and where she filed for divorce and I can't blame her. I didn't want it, but it was clear that this was not going to work out, obviously. Now, how soon, how soon after that divorce do you start transitioning?

25:40And we're talking what year here? This is what? 35 years ago, roughly? That was, well, I started the transition in 93 and I think we got divorced in 89. So it was through, there was a couple of three years in between. Yeah. So it actually made the decision. Right. But, you know, in between there, there was the tail end of the divorce there. There was a real close call with suicide. I had just lost my wife and basically, that was my whole life at that point, you know. And I was dealing with this thing that I thought I was rid of and man, it was, it was bad. And I. So the divorce, the divorce almost drives you to suicide because you identified your life and your person with that marriage and that marriage is over. And it takes you to the depths of depression. And now in two or three years, you identify as a woman and become a woman.

26:41Well, and again, I don't, I don't want to ever say that I identified as a woman. I know a lot of people say that and I never say that I identified as a woman again. I wanted to be a woman. Now I knew that was impossible. But there were steps that I could take to at least live presenting as a woman. And, you know, I get it, there's so many dudes and dresses out there and it's awfully clear and obvious that they're just dudes and dresses. Right. Now there are some that present very well and you wouldn't, you wouldn't know. A lot of them, soon as they open their mouth, the jig is up though. Correct. And I feel like, you know, if you're going to do this, come on, put some effort into it and go see a voice coach or something, which is what I did. And I had really worked on my reason, this is after I had finally made the decision to

27:44do this. And I want to note too that in my counseling, I talked to different psychiatrists. I talked to a lot of different pastors as well. My initial goal was to make this go away. And I was talking to people that knew something about the subject, but I told them my friend, I said, I don't want to do this. I want this whole thing to go away. And listening to your story, it's almost like you always wanted it to go away. But it wouldn't. Would it? Even when you were a little boy, you knew it was wrong. You shouldn't be doing it, but you were still playing dress up in hiding. And then as a young adult, you still want it. I just want it to go away. Stop it. But for some reason, you couldn't do it, even with a lot of help from other people. No, yeah. Couldn't do it. So I finally realized that I'm either going to go through this change or I'm going to wind up dead.

28:45And so I had been playing with the presentation and I had gotten a lot of compliments from people. And I did go see a voice coach and was able to modify my own voice. And for a couple of years, I had to be conscious of it and make an eventually became natural didn't have to think about it. And just in contrast, I can tell you, I still have, I just completed the detransition last October. I can tell you that even at this point, I'm still having to make a conscious effort to keep my voice more masculine at this point. Yeah. Well, you were using the other voice for 30 years. Yeah, exactly. And I'm assuming that you worked also during those 30 years. How did that go? The people that you worked with know you and believe you to be a woman as Maggie? Well, I was going to leave my company and transition and start over someplace else. I had told my boss about it because I needed to use him as a reference through a series

29:48of events. The corporate, all the corporate people found out about it and they called me and they summoned me into an office and they sat me down and told me they wanted me to stay and that they would support me. And they made it an offer and it was kind of hard to resist. So I did stay. I transitioned on that on the job and had a lot of support from a lot of people. So obviously the people there knew outside of the company, the customers we dealt with, the vendors that I worked with, and just new friends that I made after I had transitioned. They didn't know. And it might sound like I'm bragging a little bit, but I was passing. And people accepted me for who and what I appeared to be. Well, in terms of making, Willie just talked about it too in the clip that I played here in this hour, talking about you coming to church as Maggie and being baptized, even as Maggie. Yeah. So you passed.

30:48You passed really well. Well, and you know that they, you know, people that come to be baptized, they ask questions, they want to make sure that you understand, yeah. Exactly. And so they talked with me and asked me the questions and stuff and they didn't know. I was deceiving them. And of course at the time, I didn't see that wrong to me. I was just who I was at the time. And but yeah, he baptized me into false pretence is obviously for one thing I wasn't a Christian at the time. And also I wasn't who I said it was. So yeah, so I just bring that up and I bring that up because you passed, you were saying that you passed and you obviously passed, you passed in church to be baptized as a woman. And then you came to that congregation on somewhat a regular basis. I'm assuming. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I had other jobs. I moved on to other jobs and careers and nobody knew unless I told them.

31:49And even then sometimes it didn't believe me. But of course my family, they still probably saw the old me. But some of them accepted me and some didn't. And I know another part of the story, William, and maybe a painful part of the story is you being estranged from your father. And you told me before we had this conversation here on the radio when we were talking on the telephone that the name of the book comes really from your father. Can you, can you talk about that? Yeah. In 1993, I was, it was, it was telling 1992 actually, I had gone home for Christmas. A few months prior to that, I had written a letter telling my parents what I was getting ready to do. And I realized it didn't, I couldn't convey much emotion or sense of urgency or anguish in that letter, so I've reported to tape and sent that to my folks. Turns out my dad refused

32:56to listen to the tape and they called me up and said what's going on and I just could not, I couldn't say it. He started playing 20 questions with me and he finally nailed it and said, well come home for Christmas and we'll talk about it. So I did come home and it was the last night that I was there. I had to go back to Seattle where I worked at the time the next morning. And so we sat down and we had this conversation and it started off okay. He was asking some genuine sincere questions and but then it started turning ugly and my dad, he had been proud of his boy. I asked my boy, he was eagle scout, that's my boy, pilot's license, he's graduated university, that's my boy and proud of my boy and all of a sudden his boy wanted to be a girl and that had to be devastating. I get it and honestly I can't say I would have handled this any differently but he in during this talk and he was just getting so so frustrated. He went

33:57off on this diatribe about his sisters, he had six sisters and he talked about their virtues and just how wonderful they were, how women in general really and how in many ways the women are superior to men and and in his frustration he just couldn't quite get out what he wanted to say but he did spit out some words that kind of got my attention and what he said was you're just not man enough to be a woman and at the time I felt like chuckling but that was obviously not the right thing to do and the conversation went downhill from there but when I started writing this book that popped back into my head and I just thought well that's the book title. Yeah it's a great title. The title itself the words are kind of nonsensical but I still thought it made a good book title. Yeah it really does and I'm going to tell everyone where they can find that book. It will also be available in the shop at americaudloud.news so if you're listening

35:01to this on a podcast after the live broadcast then while you're doing that you can go to americaudloud.com or dot news either one of those go in the shop and then look for all of the books that are there from all the different authors that you hear right here on the network. Before we come up to another break let's get back to your transition you have the conversation with your dad and now you go through it medically and in every way don't you you change your name from where you william to begin with or okay so that is your name so you go from william to magi take us from magi came from magi okay so you even changed Margaret's name to magi so take us through that transition there 30 years ago you started to talking about your experience at work how they kept you and were supportive and you become a female and you pass everybody thinks you are a female but i guess at some point you decide i'm still not happy this isn't what i want now

36:03isn't it well it was a long time but no i i was happy um the the process involved the hormones which really they do a number on your body i mean a lot of things happened and skin texture change fat redistributed hair texture change um will improve breasts a lot of things happened and uh i had gotten electrolysis to get rid of my beard so my beard would have taken out one follicle at a time about a hundred hours of that um there's obviously uh the surgeries and at the time there was a set of standards in place that you had to go through one of the big biggest requirements was that you have to live in the opposite role for a year before you can have that surgery uh and it's just like the process was designed to weed people out do they do that anymore will you know how it's been completely thrown out the window

37:04yeah i knew they used to do that but it's crazy yeah yeah so i did that and uh did did my year in a couple two three more months and uh and i did have that final surgery that's called a vaginal plastic and um um it's pretty well accomplished this is back in 1994 is when i had that surgery and it's pretty well accomplished they say the kind of colleges can't even tell the difference on in a visual inspection um so uh after that had happened i got a tight book or i was happy i was living and presenting as woman and eventually had moved on to other companies i lived and worked in three different countries and uh um i said people just didn't know uh after a couple after a few years too i started getting attention from men and i kind of started to like it and i dated a little bit um and set had other jobs i didn't have any serious relationships right yeah uh there was there came a point where you know having been on the hormones for a few

38:09years and like i said getting attention from men and uh i i realized i i still notice women but it's more i'm paying attention to what they're wearing or how they got the hair done and you know how their date how they're walking and they're how they're communicating so that you can dress like them do makeup like them and it will look like them but not in a way of being attractive to them right and yeah it doesn't really sound like you're necessarily or were necessarily attracted to men either but it was maybe something you made you feel good that you were getting the attention that you craved being a woman yeah and going into it they i had heard that uh if if you're straight to begin with you'll most likely be straight afterwards now if you think of the word straight meaning an opposite sex attraction if you i was a guy and i was attracted to women at the time i go through this in sort of a woman which can still opposite opposite sex attraction meaning i would then be attracted to men okay there's that scenario the other scenarios if you're

39:13gay to begin with you'll most likely still be gay afterwards so it was it was up in the air who knew i didn't know what was going to happen i didn't necessarily want to still be attracted to women because i've been making me a lesbian and that's a whole other set of issues but will you mean it doesn't sound like this is about sex though is it no no it's not at all it's that's not what i'm getting from this yeah it's it's not there there's there's there's sexual attraction to one gender or another um and then there's who you think you are or how you want to live how you see yourself and um we're we're going to get into a break here but i want to get into that conversation with everything that we see going on here in the 21st century in america in western civilization and it's disturbing it's something that we deal with on this show and this network quite a bit and i want to talk about that with William Howard coming up more truth in minutes on america out loud talk

40:13radio are you struggling with thinning hair try roots from the wellness company this doctor formulated non-oily hydrogel uses seven powerful peptides and key nutrients to nourish your scalp and support visibly thicker healthier hair visit twc dot health forward slash out loud news code out loud for 20% off your first order that is twc dot health forward slash out loud tonight at nine o'clock it is after dark with robin andru and that follows the national security hour at eight o'clock eastern and coming up here in just a few minutes it is unleashed the political news hour i'm booker scott this is the truth be told we are having an interesting conversation here with william alan who transitioned from a young man in his 20s i guess about 30 who transitioned

41:19to a female who stayed a female for 30 years and as you just heard he was happy as a female but he didn't stay happy forever something happened along the way that made william look for something more so let's get into the conversation there william what was it that made you look for something else you had looked to become a girl at one point and then a female a woman and now you're back to a man and it's an incredible story so take us there well for 20 plus years yeah like i was happy and live and work in three different countries settled into a very comfortable lifestyle and uh in 2015 uh i came back to clear water from the pacific north west my father was terminal now we hadn't spoken in 23 years at the time i was still in touch with my mother though and it's not to say that she approved of or liked what i did but she still loved her

42:23child and so we still talk but we did it and we did it clandestinely uh dad never really knew about so you don't talk to your dad for 24 years he's yeah he still upset so angry that his son became a daughter okay and there were some others in the family too it's a very large family he had there uh he was one of eight and uh so i've got a lot of aunts and uncles a lot of cousins and uh not all of the family accepted it either now they didn't all affirm me some did um so it was nice to be able to still be in touch with some of that family but yeah in 2015 uh he was coming to the end of about a three-year fight with cancer and uh he didn't have much longer to to live and my mother too was just starting to get pretty sick as well excuse me and i i had told her that you know at any time i'm ready to come down and and uh you know take care of her and uh he was pretty much in the hospital

43:25full time now i'm an only child i'm the only only child in the old family so i didn't have any siblings that were taken care of them but uh there was another aunt and uncle here in town it was helping out best they could and uh it was uh i had talked to my mother one night and uh she finally agreed to let me come down and uh start taking care of her because she was having a hard time getting around she couldn't take care of him anymore either um and plus knowing that dad was terminal i'd have to be here anyway so the very next morning i got a call from my aunt and she said that my mother passed during the night wait what you mean dad no it was my mother totally unexpected yes so now you're left with your dad and his daughter you right yeah so i hopped a plane and uh got into the town the next day my aunt and uncle picked me up now this particular aunt and

44:28uncle they had never seen Maggie before and we had only resumed communication maybe a couple of years before that as well so it was awkward for everybody obviously and uh so i got home mom was in the morgue dad was in the hospital and pretty much out of it so my aunt and i were spending quite a bit of time at the hospital now she would go into the room with dad i i wouldn't i i didn't want to cause any grief for him especially considering the state he was in yeah and his last days and um she was so hoping that i'd be able to go in and and there was a nurse there that i was working quite a bit with them and uh she knew that he had a son so when i showed up she was confused and so my aunt explained the whole story to her well that nurse and my aunt uh conspired lovingly and tried to to get me to go in and uh i really did not want to cause him any grief and

45:32and there was an element too if i didn't i knew he was not going to be the same man that i knew he was going to look a lot different sure quarter of a century yeah exactly and i really wanted would rather have remembered him uh from when we were still good you know and uh so we they came up with a plan and and and i made him a deal i said look if you can if you tell him that it's Maggie that's here not William um make sure he understands that uh and if you can't answer you verbally tell him to blink his eyes twice if he wants to see me and i'm thinking this is not going to happen there's no way i thought that was a safe bet so they went in there and uh my aunt apparently told him that Maggie was here and made sure he understood and she asked him if he wanted to see me and he blinked his eyes twice she came out and said he blinked his eyes twice i couldn't believe it so at that point the nurse calls out from inside the room and says he just

46:37said send her in uh wow okay this is crazy so i went in and it was uh uh very awkward it was uh a stressful thing for me and i'm sure for him too and uh of course i get choked up when i start thinking about the topic did you get did you get did you get any did you get any resolution from that at all what it was it came from it it was a it was a deathbed reconciliation yeah we uh i went in i saw him i went up to him and uh held his hand and and uh i told him i said whatever happened between us is in the past and if you want i'll help you get through this and he squeezed my hand and uh then about a day and a half two days yeah he passed so that was uh that was just an amazing thing and my aunt and i are still in awe about that today

47:39yeah and uh i never thought that would happen the crazy thing too is um well not crazy but kind of a neat thing that happened in 1993 when i had had that conversation with my folks the next day they had to drive me to the airport and uh dad drove and of course nothing not a word was spoken and when i got to the airport and got out my mother got out as well she gave me a hug and she whispered in my ear she said nothing is forever so all those years or those 23 years you know he would never he would never speak to him in and uh and but mom was right though in the year she was right yeah and nothing is forever and mom told you that and i i came to realize to you that if she hadn't died when she did i would not have been there in time that's right to be with dad yeah and nor if she had died after him you may have never had the opportunity to even have that reconciliation so it's a it's amazing how God works in our lives

48:45and things like that a lot of times people don't even recognize if they would just step back a little bit they could say hey that's God working and for some reason we don't always pay attention to it we don't keep ourselves quiet and still enough to do that so let's take your story now to where you transition back to William yeah that's where you are now and it took a lot of years to get here i assume that you know you said it was october of 2023 when you detransitioned i assume i completed the process you completed the process yeah from 2015 on uh i had to be here for at least a year i could probate took that long settle my parents estate and uh so during that time i started going to this church that my uncle was going to it's time and which was was Calvary and um you know i had gone to a lot of churches uh in my life and i'm early childhood i was raised in the church i i i i never really listened to sermons or anything say well a lot of them were

49:47just speaking gibberish nothing ever made any sense okay and so i'm going to church at Calvary and uh after really he had announced maybe about probably 2016 i think and now say we're going to do the beach baptism and i thought well i've never been baptized i was baptized supposedly baptized as a child as a Methodist but that's not really baptism and uh i thought well let's just go do this because i think i'm a Christian you know i i believed in Jesus i believed in God and i believed that Jesus died for my sins and and uh i had the basics basic understanding and so i went on baptized well obviously i kept going to Calvary and uh after a few more months who thinks pastor really was saying started to make some sense i think i started taking notice of a lot of things that were said and one thing i realized that all the pastors and the preachers who have a tv personalities that i had heard before they weren't really talked to none of

50:48whatever talking about sin and hell and repentance it was all feel good you know God is great you're great yeah God wants what's great for you blah blah blah blah i'd always heard that you know Jesus died for your sins i'd always heard that cavalierly nonchalantly and that's kind of how it was i'd it in my head i had more of an intellectual belief i think than anything else uh and it was a blind faith really but listening more to pastor willey i started hearing some things that um initially uh didn't necessarily what i wanted to hear and even so because of that somehow that went credibility to what he was saying you know and i started paying more attention and at the same time i became a youtube at it and i started stumbling on to videos from

51:49John MacArthur and Ray Comforts Todd Freel Steve Lawson Bodie Balcom Percy Sproul and the thing that i noticed was they're all preaching the same thing certain same core issues anyway and i had never really understood this whole repentance and hell and sin and in the relationship i didn't understand any consequences right and uh and i started getting into apologetics i learned about evidence for god a creator god and for Jesus and i mean uh i heard somebody talking about everything with Frank Turk and i heard him talking about uh not just evidence for all this but overwhelming evidence you know with an evidence wow i mean my head wanted to explode so i started exploring that and and looking at real scientific evidence and and archaeological evidence dna have i mean real hardcore stuff and i no longer had

52:54just a blind faith i i had a faith based on evidence and i think that kind of helped push me along and i got to say listen i i the looking back on this thing i i can't help but think how dim with it i was and i just could not get this for so long yeah it took it took so long and i also have to just thank god and praise god for his patience man it took a while and we heard we heard there with willies clip how this ended where it culminated and that was with the beach baptism where you decided that it was time to publicly display that i am william and i thought you know the thing that made me tear up in that sermon was the words that you said i want to look at you as a christian brother and that was really strong and those were such good words and you know as we started this hour here tonight i really wanted people to have a better

53:59understanding so that there could be maybe some compassion and some empathy so that we can change hearts and minds instead of just trying to legislate or put some type of policy from a politician that we need to have a caring compassionate heart but at the same time there are some wacky things going on in our country right now and i know you stand against those things that are going on with the transgender we've got about a minute or a minute and a half so i want you to talk about how that lgbtq community has been hijacked how what they are doing to our children and then also tell everybody how they can get your book also well after you know i had come to christ obviously i realized eventually i needed to detransition and i got to tell you that was a three-year process and even finding a surgeon was hard because every time i talked to somebody

55:00and told them that i was detransitioning nobody wanted to have anything to do with me it took me twice as long to find a surgeon and i thought it was going to take because i needed to get a misstep to me and uh it i got way behind schedule so it was as if there were roadblocks being put up and even my own medical doctor was causing me grief and they just didn't want me to do this and so and that's one of the the side effects of what's going on today um i you know i'm not necessarily a huge fan of kids i don't like care for kids that much honestly but um if i ever see a kid in danger or being abused or mistreated i will go absolutely nuts and what i see right now going on is making me go absolutely nuts and so as part of the book uh the last chapter was going to be a treat us on what's going on today how this all got started because they are coming after the

56:02children the trans and the kids booker yep 100% and uh one thing i want to call out is the american college of pediatricians uh states that 80 to 95 percent of children with gender dysphoria will resolve if left unmetically and unsocially transitioned and they will resolve in later adolescence in other words 80 in other words more than three quarters of kids that experiences will grow out of it on their own and just let them be kids let them be kids oh can we agree to that and uh william i want to thank you so much and uh give everybody the the title of the book again we have to go our time is up unleash the political news hours coming up here in just a minute but go ahead and give us the name of that book again and tell people where they could get it not not man enough to be a woman you can get it on amazon uh for now it will be on other platforms

57:03soon uh in your story well um and also you can follow me on twitter if you like uh or ex it's uh at w-m-l-n-l-o-e-n-twenty-twenty-four at w-m-l-n-twenty-four on twitter you can follow me william thank you so much for doing this i really appreciate it i hope that people have learned something here in this hour and i want you to remember that you were told two thousand years ago that you are the salt of the earth and salt without flavor it has no value so whatever you do keep being salty have yourself a great night there is only one truth you've been listening to the truth be told with booker scott on america out loud