Does Trusting God Make You Complacent With Sin? A Catholic Therapist Explains

0:00Low-rowing, my name is Adam Cross. I'm a licensed marriage family therapist in Southern California. I'm also the founder of the Catholic Therapy Center. We have eight Catholic clinicians working at our center all across California, all wanting to provide a really solid Catholic approach to healing the human person specifically through the power of the Holy Spirit. So really inviting the Holy Spirit into the room and asking the Holy Spirit, what are your plans for healing? What are your plans for the people that we're working with? And today I want to talk to you a little bit about something I've encountered a lot in therapy. And it is this really scary zone between thinking and believing and having faith that we will be okay, that we have a good relationship with God, right? That God will provide even in the face of my weaknesses and sins and mistakes that God's plan is good that we can trust in Him and a fear of just total complacency.

1:02So what do I mean by that? Is especially working with with individuals struggling with scrupulosity and OCD, we can really grapple with a sense of if I trust in the Lord and I'm not trusting as much in myself, then maybe I'll be complacent with sin. And that is a fear that I found drives so many people of faith, so many Catholics, and I've experienced it too, where I think if I'm just trusting in God, then I'm being complacent, right? And we don't verbalize it out loud like that, we don't tell ourselves that, but that's how we're living. In the gospels especially, there's so many instances of God's radical mercy and love and understanding, right? I mean, the woman caught in adultery is this huge example that the prodigal son, radical mercy to us sometimes it doesn't make sense. It's like, but he did this, and a feast and

2:04a robe, what are you doing? So we're afraid that if we really welcome in and receive God's mercy, that maybe we'll just be complacent. And I think part of that we have to be looking at our own lack of trust in ourselves. I think maybe there's something to that, maybe we've actually shown ourselves that at some point in the past, when we've encountered a radical mercy, a radical gift of love, we've kind of squandered it. And so maybe there is a fear based in our own experience that maybe we can't be trusted, which is pure gift. Maybe we're just afraid that if we accept this radical gift, this free gift of mercy, we'll find ourselves back in shame and sin in those dark places in our lives. So maybe that is a really valid fear for us to have that if we just accept God's mercy without anything, we'll just be complacent. But God is calling us not to have a faith based

3:07in fear. I mean, we hear in Scripture over and over again, be not afraid. Be not afraid. So how do we accept his mercy, but also not be complacent? And I think that's the million dollar question, because in society, we kind of see those extremes. We see an extreme of self-reliance, right? Even scriptulosity. I have to do it self-made man, don't sin, you know, be virtuous all on your own, all these things. And it's all about me, me, me, what I can do, what I can do, what I can do. And on the other hand, the far end of the spectrum, it's just mercy. It just doesn't really matter what you do, right? It doesn't matter what you're responsible for. It's just your love, then that's it, right? And neither of those are the full picture, right? The full picture is in the middle of that. You are loved, you are the beloved. God is willing to do anything to be with you in eternity, even willing to send his son to become man, to live and to be brutally killed for you. Like, there's nothing he won't do for your salvation. He'll do everything. We have to acknowledge,

4:08like, you are loved. And like, the gospel's New Testament is very clear. Like, it is about love. Love covers the multitude of sins, right? If we can have all these amazing gifts, even supernatural gifts, but if we do not have love, we are a clean, gone, clashing symbol, right? It is about love, it is about mercy. And then what is our part in it? Well, if we are the beloved, if we have a lover, someone who is loving us, we have a perfect father of abundance, we are just being so radically loved, then we do want that love to enter into every single thing that we do. And we do want to respond to that love with our lives. And that means changing our lives, changing what we do, bringing it to him, even if we don't fully understand it yet. Why is he calling me to do it like this? Okay, Lord, I'm trusting in you. I'm bringing this to you, knowing that I am loved, and I'm responding with love. And so it is that slow process of

5:12starting with our identity. You are loved. You are a beloved child of God. And no, it's not all up to you. Sometimes I'll talk to people in sessions about your salvation isn't up to you. And they're like, what? You said it is, I have to be sinless, I have to say no, your salvation is from God. You can't earn your way to heaven. The good thief on the cross. Man, he did not have much time for good works. He really didn't, but his confession of who the Lord was, that is an act of faith, that is an ascent of faith. That is a yes to the Lord, but his life did not reflect that. And his God's grace allowed him to enter into paradise with Christ that very day like, wow, wow, what a mercy, what a beautiful mercy. Yeah. And so we need to, and we're called to lean in to God's mercy with faith in relationship, in relationship, everything has to be in relationship. Because what happens if it's

6:17not in relationship, you have these two extremes, mercy and love without relationship is complacency. It is, you can do whatever you want. It doesn't matter. Why doesn't it matter because it doesn't affect anybody and you're fine, right? That is one ideology. It's a far extreme, but it's divorced from relationship. And then the other end without relationship is, no, it's all to me. I have to do it. I have to be virtuous. I have to marry it. It's all to me. It's all to me without relationship because it's non-relationship with God. And so to answer that question of how do I live, not in fear, how do I actually let God's mercy and grace like, per me, every part of me without living in fear, but then how do I also not be complacent to sin? It means that you're called to a daily relationship with the one who loves you, a daily intimacy. It means time to slow down. It means prayer isn't a chore. Prayer isn't something you do. Prayer is, it's just a part of

7:22you, right? To pray unceasingly is like, you have a God who was there. Like, there's a veil in a far world. We can't always see him with our senses, but he is always there every moment you have to breathe to slow down is a moment of prayer. Everything you do, God is there with you. And to be roaming and leaning into that reality means that you are loving, you're receiving his graces every second. And even when you make a mistake, even when you fall, even when you sin, he's right there to take you back up, to give you the grace to go to confession, to be reconciled with the church, to receive his son in the Eucharist. He's calling you to that, but not out of fear, just out of love, because he has a plan. So I just want to invite you, if you're struggling with that, like I want to not be living in fear, and I want to receive his mercy and his grace more, it might help to look at those situations in the past where you've actually felt like you can't trust yourself. Like, man, I really broke my own trust. Look at how I squander

8:25this gift. Can I forgive myself? And maybe it's even recognizing how have I grown from that? Like, maybe I'm not 16 when I did that thing, right? Maybe I'm not eight when that thing happened to me. Like, maybe I'm an adult, maybe I've grown, maybe I've been doing my own work, maybe I am doing my own work, maybe I can show myself even this week how I've grown, how God's grace against not all to me, but how God's grace is allowing me to do things differently, and I am doing it differently. It's rebuilding that trust with yourself so that you can actually receive a gift and use it as God intends to actually be gracious and grateful for the gift and not squander your gift. You can actively do that today. And then this fear of complacency is recognizing, I don't want to sin. I don't want to be complacent, but I'm in that constant relationship. And so I am going to be attentive with the Lord, again, not on my own, but I'm going to be attentive with the Lord. What is He calling me to do today? What is He urging me to do? What is He inviting me to do? Where

9:28is He bringing me peace? When the Holy Spirit convicts us, there is peace. So even if the Holy Spirit needs to convict you, if you have to change your life, you have to repent of your sins, like, there's going to be peace and even doing that hard thing, but you're going to feel called to. That doesn't mean like an absence of fear, anxiety or anything, but it means that you're going to have peace and doing what is right. So again, coming back to a relationship, God, what do you want for me today? What do you want for me in this? So building that time into your day to be asking Him. And I want to dare you. And I know I've talked about this in previous videos and podcasts. Ask God, like, Father, what is your heart for me today? That's one of the things I really want to credit to encounter school ministries and Father Timothy Gallagher is just really asking that question. Father, what are you thinking of me right now? And can we imagine the Father's gaze upon us right now? Can you receive the Father's love? Like, Father is love. So He's just looking upon you with love and mercy. Can we just receive that? Can we even feel that in our bodies? What does that

10:29like? Sometimes I like to just go stand out in the sun, the hot California sun, and just feel like the heat on my body. And sometimes even that, just that sensory experience, just okay, what would it be like to experience God's love? The Father's gaze upon me right now just to receive that. And then what does the Father's heart for you? The Father's heart is good. It is goodness. We could get metaphysical there. Well, but the Father's heart is goodness. And so what is on the Father's heart for you? What does He want to speak to you this day? To actually spend time trying to receive, K God, what are you speaking to me today? Maybe that's prayer, man. It's going on a walk. Maybe that's listening to the daily gospel going to mass. What is He speaking to you? So I just want to invite you that kind of that middle point, the answer between I want to receive more of God's mercy. I want to trust. I don't want to have faith. It's going to be okay that I'm going to be okay in really believing like I'm going to be okay in the Lord

11:31and the balance of, but I don't want to be complacent. The middle point, the answer is that relationship, a daily, hourly, minute by minute relationship with a God who is there, who is present with you. It's a keep laying into Him and to know you're going to be okay. It's going to be okay. If it's not okay, His plan's not done yet. He has great plans for you in this life, in the next and He will bring the peace. You don't have to muster it up. He will supply the peace for you. I'd love to hear your thoughts on these topics. Feel free to comment them below like this video. Give it a share. We'll see you next time. Thanks, God bless.