Awaken Hope - Identity, why with Milly Gonazalez

0:00Are you tired of feeling hopeless? Or do you feel as though you carry around an invisible ball and chain? If so, you are in the right place. It's time now for a wicked hope with Candy Campbell. Candy is a therapist and grief counselor that works with women to help them process and heal from emotional events that can keep them feeling stuck. Let's take this journey together. And now here's your host, Candy Campbell. Welcome back to Lincoln Health. I am so super grateful that you are choosing to tune in. I have a fabulous guest here with me today. Her name is Millie Gonzalez. And Millie is a friend that I met through the Brian Tracy speakers Academy. But she is also an entrepreneur, speaker, and business leader. She's passionate about helping people discover their God-given purpose and build lives and businesses with intention. As a CEO of JC Contractors Group,

1:02she has led the growth of a thriving construction company while inspiring others through her leadership, faith, and resilience. She's originally from Nicaragua and Millie immigrated the United States as a teenager and has built her journey on perseverance, service, and unwavering faith. Today, she shares practical principles of leadership purpose, personal growth, and entrepreneurship through speaking engagements, workshops, and her podcast, Miracle in You. Welcome, Millie. I am so super grateful that you are a part of the Awakened Hope Show. Thank you so much for the invitation and for the warm welcome. I'm very, very happy to be here. I'm humbled. And thank you so much for allowing this space so that we can talk and connect. So, I mean, I know. I've talked to you, you know, when we were at the Brian Tracy speakers Academy, but I would love for you to share your story about what has inspired you as far as being an entrepreneur

2:05and where you are today. I mean, I know you came from Nicaragua and you really blossomed, blurrst in the entrepreneur as an entrepreneur, but I would love for you to give some guidance and wisdom about your story. To your story for those speakers that are listening going, I desire to become an entrepreneur or they're in that path and they're like, how do I do this? Or, you know, they're kind of spinning, you know, how you, when you're starting, you kind of don't know all the directions you got to go and you feel like you're at top spinning around and around going anywhere, but the direction you need to go. So, what I would say is that to be quite honest and very sincere, it was never in my dreams to own a business or be an entrepreneur. I think that God has allowed me to follow that path and within that path really,

3:08utilize my gifts and my passions, communication as one of them. So, it's gave me a platform to be able to speak and inspire other women to actually go and pursue whatever it is that is within them. I am really big on everybody has a special gift, a special something that is within them from before they were even created in their mother's womb. So, I am passionate about sharing my story and how I, even though my dream was not to be an entrepreneur, I have found space in that entrepreneurship life to be able to serve others and utilize what God has given me. So, it's just a space that I use to explore my talents and my gifts. Wow. I know that you really do have a heart for changing lives. That I saw when we met and you were ability

4:10to communicate what you want to share with the world. That's powerful. Thank you. You know, I think that in this world, the most important beings are beings, humans. And if we can show some empathy to whatever it is that anybody is going through, and if we could do that for just one person we've changed the world. So, I try to live my life that way, just with the intention of always having my eyes wide open to the needs of others and to see where I could be of help, of use. Well, like any entrepreneur, you've had your ups and your downs and things have kind of life has happened to you in ways. However, the strength that you exude is powerful because you have, yes, life's happened to you. You've had things occur in your life and you're like,

5:12oh, you know, you don't let it set you back permanently. It may stall you out. It may sideline you for a moment, but you have always kind of pulled yourself up by your big girl pants, and you kept on walking, even though sometimes you didn't necessarily know the direction or the path that you were going. Well, there was a point in my life where I actually was in a very low point at the age of 35. I wasn't even completely aware of what I was going through. I just felt this really big sense of sadness inside of me and I thought I wasn't going to be able to get out of it. But by the grace of God, he rescued me. He allowed me to see my true identity. So, yes, I have gone through some ups and some downs and I've been able to overcome many challenges. But I've also been at a point where I felt hopeless

6:14and really thought that my life would never be able to turn around and be meaningful and reasonably happy. But I would say I had a one-on-one with God and that's what really changed me and he gave me my identity back. The identity he had always given me. It was within me, like I said before, I believe this is within you before you are actually placed on this earth. So, but somehow some way life takes you in different directions, challenges, losses, divorces. Yeah, you know, breaking children on your own as a single parent, you make mistakes, you have regrets. And all the accumulations of those life experiences can get you to a place of feeling hopeless and being like, what is nothing that I'm doing? It's coming out right. I don't think I'm doing a great job as a parent. I don't think I'm doing a great job as an entrepreneur.

7:16I don't think I'm doing a great job as a daughter. I haven't been able to stay in a stable marriage. What is wrong with me? So, I started questioning a lot of those things and like I said, if I had not had that face to face with God, I would probably still be in that place. Since that moment on, since he rescued me, I've used my voice in everywhere I can to share the hope and to say that I am as special as everybody else. And if I lived and I survived and I overcame that big depression and that big sense of not belonging and not being good enough, you can do it too. And I empathize a lot with women that are single moms and that are doing it alone. Because that was my story too. And it was my mom's story at some point in time. So, all those things have really given me a purpose to utilize my any platform that I give in my voice to really share and say, you know, there's still hope

8:18you can still be better, you can try. Every day it's just one day at a time. And actually surrounding yourself with the right people, with the people that are going to encourage you and let you know. And maybe sometimes allow you to see yourself through their eyes because we are our worst critics. And there are no, you know, we tend to not speak about ourselves so nicely. But there's actually kind people that have the ability to see the goodness inside of us. And that really helped me too, just to surround myself by a group of supportive people that really, you know, helped me together, hugged me and told me you're not alone. So that's part of, you know, some of my most difficult times you know, that's profound insight, you know, to acknowledge that we are not alone. And when we feel that lowest point, sometimes it's just reaching out and saying, I need can you talk or can you, you know,

9:20yeah, be a listening ear for me. Yeah, no, definitely. And that's what happens that we tend to think that we're living life alone because we put ourselves in living life alone. We don't raise our hand. We don't ask for help. And it's because we're so afraid of being judged and expressing all those feelings and, you know, and maybe being or feeling inadequate, but why is your life like this and why am I feeling this way? But the reality is that most humans experience the same kind of feelings. And it's just a matter of that support system that I have around you. And a lot of work, it takes a lot of work to kind of get out of the, you know, those states of mind. Right, right. No, you're, I really admire your perseverance and your tenacity to keep on going in spite of what life has unfolded for you at times.

10:22I mean, you know, we did have some pretty good conversations. And I see this strength in you. I see, you know, you may not necessarily, I always see that, but I see the strength that you carry. The, and a lot of your, a CEO, a female CEO of a business, you're in an industry that is predominantly male. And yet you carry yourself with grace and with ease. And even though you may not necessarily feel like, sometimes you have it all together, you've got all the answers or you know, that you're going to figure all those things out, whatever those things are, you know, you do not let that affect you. And I do honor that. Well, you know, I feel I need to be an example to other people. I feel that if the only example I can give and show is

11:24to show people that you shouldn't let your light be dimmed, that you should actually carry the fire and own your fire and in your passion. And even though there are days that we don't feel our best, we can wake up on the following day and say, you know what, I'm going to try to make the best out of today. And just making little steps, little steps, little steps at a time, I, you know, I think that people get cut up too much. I'm like wanting to achieve big things. And they just like think they, it's overwhelming. But if you break down that big thing into tiny little steps and you start taking one tiny little step at a time, I think anything is possible. There's this preaching, I don't know if you're familiar with Tyler Perry, I've always been a big fan of his movies, The Funny Ones and he's done some very perform movies and he does a preaching and he says,

12:27it's like something that I hold in my heart. He says pray and worship, climb and maintain. Maintain, climb, maintain, pray and worship. That is sort of my ritual, you know? I go through life sometimes that out of pilots, I do like one little step. And take a little other step, maintain, pray, worship because in all of that, I always feel that God is with you. So especially if you welcome him in. So I, I, I wanted to share that praying and worship, climb and maintain. Wow. Okay, which is going to lead us to a perfect segue for a small break. We'll be back. Day two. The tired of praying to lose weight, having low self esteem, not being able to do things with friends or family. Don't give up hope. Straight your health is here for you. We are a new paradigm in weight loss and health management. We don't follow the traditional methods of weight loss

13:29that continue to fail over and over again. We get to know you and find the root cause of your weight problem. Then we start from where you are and help you develop a personalized health plan that will not only enable you to achieve the weight loss you desire, but more importantly, we will show you how to be truly nutritionally healthy. Get your life and yourself a steamed back. Don't wait. Contact straight to your health today at www.ss-health.com and set up your free consultation. We can't wait to get to know you and help you achieve a deeper or meaningful lifestyle that fits your needs. That's www.ss-health.com. We're here for you. Well, we're back. We can hope. I am so super grateful. I have Milligan Zollas here and she has been talking about how she, I mean, again, I met her at the Brian Tracy speakers academy. Wow, that's a tongueful. And we grew to be, to develop a friendship.

14:31And she, I admire her. I do. I admire her for what she does. But I also know, Millie, you know, there are women out there that maybe you're aspiring to become an entrepreneur or even just step into their voice. I would love for you to share with someone once, information wants to get in touch with you. How can they do that? Please share that information. We'll make sure it's all in the show notes. Sure, for sure. You can send me an email at mgunzales, Z in the middle, Z at the end, at the miracleinu.com. Hmm, perfect. Again, you know, Millie's information will be in the show notes. For the four days that we were in San Diego, I found her very inspiring. And she, like I said, she's, and I find a lot of people, not everybody, do I find inspiring, but I found Millie inspiring because she, in a profession, then again, is predominantly male.

15:32And she did not let that dim her light. It's many of us, and I'm talking about myself in this sensual situation. You know, when we're surrounded by very strong male personalities, sometimes that can make a shrink back or make us think, oh, I don't equate, or what makes me think I can compete or be in this group. Or, and that doesn't necessarily have to mean just males. It can be certain females. You know, you can encounter that with females. What I observed with Millie is, he didn't let that shrink her. She didn't, I mean, we had, what? In our group, we had one, two, four women, and was it four men? Was it four men? We had Dallas. Yeah, we had four, Maverick. Maverick, yeah. We have three, four, no, we have five. Five? Yeah, we had Maverick.

16:33We had Dallas. We had Dr. Patel. We had, Kelly, was just four. No, no, yeah, it was four. It was four. We were evenly matched, but I mean, you know, this was a group that was very interesting. And as far as, you know, we were a unique, we collected group together, but we all, we were, for sure. We all kind of melded and we grew, learned from each other. And it was, I feel, it was a powerful four days. But, you know, Millie, you know, if you were to talk to, if you were doing a speech, and you were to talk to someone, maybe it's a group of women, and they're like, I know you just, we're talking about Tyler Perry's statement, that you keep in your heart, and you keep in your, in your realm to help inspire you. What would you say to someone that's like,

17:33oh, they're on the fence, they want to do, they want to be an entrepreneur, but they're like, huh, I don't even know where to begin. I'm, I'm, I'm, and, or they're kind of break into a profession that is very male dominated. What I would say, I always like to start with identity. Let's, let's try to figure out who we really are. One of the exercises that I share with the women that I speak with is that I let them use a sheet. And in that sheet, we have all the negative definitions about our personalities that either we think of ourselves, we have heard others say about ourselves, and that had caused some type of her pain and has gotten a stuck. And I try to walk through, let's go through every single one of them and see if we can find a flip meaning to that. For example, in my personal life,

18:35I heard since I was a little girl that I was too hyper, too active, I didn't sit still. And I would hear this comments about my personality from a negative perspective. Well, that's what helps me be so dynamic in my work today. That's what keeps me vibrant and moving and not still and always looking and always exploring. It's that little merely personality that I had carried since I was a little girl that it was my family, my friends, my teachers, my cousins, my uncles and aunts in general were trying to correct, but correcting it, it's not necessarily, don't get me wrong, sometimes we have bad habits, we have to address. But some of those things that we see of ourselves, that it's, we see it from a negative perspective, are actually the things that make us who we are and that are our true gifts.

19:37So I try to go through this exercise. You know, then I go into my teenage years and I was labeled as she's so rebellious, she doesn't listen, she's always talking, it's she doesn't keep quiet. Well, I'm unconventional, I'm bold. I speak my mind and I have strong convictions and I'm going to share those with you. So again, let's flip it, let's flip those things and let's try to find the positive in them. And if there's certain things that need to be addressed about our personalities, bad habits that we have practiced for way too long, let's try to figure out how you can take little steps to start addressing those, right? Because not every bad thing that we have and you know, because we are flawed, we have things that we need to work on. But I think that when you do that, I think people really try to start exploring

20:39their true identity. And after you find out who you are, who you truly are, then give a purpose, give a purpose, get all those gifts, all those talents that you have and put it into something that you're passionate about. And that passion is your why. It's your purpose. And if you again, little, beady steps at a time, one little thing, work towards your goals every day, one little step at a time. Yeah, I love it, I love it. When you know your why, nothing else matters. Because you, that's what's going to drive you, that's what's going to inspire you, that's what's going to keep you going forward, even when life hands you something, like, wait, where's this coming from? I wasn't expecting that, but you keep that why in the forefront and the back of your mind, and it's kind of like, that's the propeller

21:40that's going to put you reaching your goals and becoming that best version of you, whatever she or he is, you know, here she is, we all need to have a why. We all need to know why we do what we do. And she's right, you know, we all have, you know, the little quirks in our personality, but it's okay, it's what makes us unique. And oftentimes it's perception of what an event is or what someone did for us, like she was talking about how she was labeled to loud in, you know, hyperactive and stuff like that. I was always told, you know, again, when I was a kid, my grandma used to say I was too loud or I was too quiet. It didn't matter what I was doing, but what I came to realize, and this is a recent revelations, all that that was done way back when, those messages that I heard way back when

22:43were actually equipping me to be able to do it today. And it was just a minor, for me, it was a big switch, but it was like, let that lens remove those binders and realize, recognize, I wouldn't be doing what I am doing today if I hadn't gone through what I was told way back when I was a kid, that, you know, because I used to, I like to observe, I like to hold space. And when I was three, as you know my story, I always thought as a detriment that my mom over-apprentified me. But what was revealed to me was, it was an equipment to step into the role I'm doing as a counselor, as a therapist, and as a show host, I can hold space. Yeah, it's great. I love that, you know, you're able to look back and, you know, really take a look at, you know, what was happening at the time might have been uncomfortable for you at the time,

23:43but it's actually helped you in today's in the present to do what you do. And I think that's wonderful. If we could just switch the meanings of things, sometimes we explore great freedom. Yeah. And, you know, like you said, God always has a purpose for us. We may not always see it. It may not necessarily always reveal itself immediately when we want it to be revealed, but his timing is always perfect. And things show up. If it's something that's meant for us, it will come back, even if we miss it. You know, we're not ready for it. It'll come back. Yeah. Yeah. I firmly do believe that, you know, things that they're meant to show up in your life. You're meant to step into it. If you're not ready for it, you're not ready for it at the time. And that's okay. It'll circle back. I think it's humans. We tend to get all wrapped around the axle. At least I do at times I have.

24:43Well, I forgot something I missed it. You know, I gotta go back. And it's like, you can't go back and change what's done. All you can do is go, okay. And this is when sometimes when I'm like, God, I just royally mess that one up. Yeah. But not as gracious and he brings things back to us. And he opens doors for us. And if a door, you know, doors not opening that you want to open it, and you're trying desperately to open it or get it to open, there's a reason why that door is not opening. It's open. Yeah. Yep. That's for sure. And one thing that I wanted to share as you're talking is that when you have passion for something, right? And you start working a little bit at a time. Great things start to happen. Imagine we met in May on an education four day experience.

25:45And we connected and now we're talking. And now gave me the space to utilize my gift and my passion for sharing hope and sharing my life and my experience with other people. I want there to learn how to speak or to be a better speaker, to educate myself because I'm in this like journey of wanting to learn and always educate myself. I believe that's very important that everybody should do that. But here I am with this meaningful connection, having this very meaningful conversation. So I encourage everybody to take those little steps. You never know who you're gonna meet. You never know what door is going to open. You never know what's gonna spark inside your being just by trying and making a little step at a time. You're so on point, which is gonna lead us to a small break. She is on point.

26:46Her wisdom is amazing. Imagine crossing two oceans and discovering not just a destination, but a home. That's what I found at Ilta Soro, a family run farm to table retreat at the Cross Road to Tuscany, Lazio, and Umbria. Oce Rita and Massimo welcomed me just like family. I harvested olives, savored fresh, pressed, extra virgin olive oil, and took a cooking class in their restaurant kitchen. I'm still making that eggplant recipe back at home. Beyond the food, Rita guided us through Italy's rich history. Intricate flower mosaics crafted by local artists, a wine tasting overlooking, the lush green hills of Umbria, and a meal in Chibita di Bani Reggio. In ancient village, we had to cross a footbridge to get to. Ilta Soro isn't just a place to stay, it's a place to gather, celebrate, and reconnect. Whether you're seeking a peaceful yoga retreat, a dream wedding, or a meaningful family reunion,

27:49Ilta Soro makes every moment magical. If you're dreaming of an authentic Italian escape, then you need to follow at Ilta Soro underscore Italy on Instagram. That's I-L-T-E-S-O-R-O, underscore Italy. Come home to Ilta Soro. Welcome back to Awakened Home. Again, I have Millie Gonzalez here, and we've been talking. She has been inspiring and sharing her inspiration. But one of the things that I know that is inspiring to her, and is an inspiration to her, is her children. She does a lot of what she does, not only for herself, but with her children and mine. And one of the things that popped into my head was, you know, the reason, and that's part of that why, but it's a reason why we do what we do, not just for us, but for someone.

28:50And I'm not saying you should do something for someone, but you have them in the back of your mind, or the forefront of your mind, that this is another driving factor to get you to where you need to be. But, well, yeah, I would say the friend of my children had been a big inspiration in my life, because as I shared with you, I went into this big, sad hole at some point in time. And there were the only reasons I actually got up in the morning and continue to fight through life. And the reason why I went to seek help, because I wanted to show up better for them. However, I would say that as a working mom, as a single mom, as an entrepreneur, there are some sacrifices that sometimes you make, and a lot of times comes in the form of time,

29:50when you allocate time to something that you're building, you're taking away time from another aspect of your life. This is impossible to be at 100% everywhere, especially women that we have so much going on. We want to take care of ourselves or health, and we also have to take our vitamins, but we also have to make sure that the kid is doing good in school. But we also have to take them to a doctor because he got sick, but I also have to show up in the business and be a good leader. And I also have to exercise because I have it this week. And I need to also at some point in time be a good daughter, I gotta show up for my mom, because she's sick and she needs my help, and my brother needs my help. And so you try to be everywhere in something suffers. Something always ends up suffering in that. So in my case, the people that moved me the most, inspire me the most are the ones that suffered the most for my absence.

30:54And there's regrets that it comes to that. But at the end of the day today, I try to be a little kind to myself. I'm not going to be able to take those experiences that my children went through where I was I was in there, and they needed more connection and nurturing that already happened. What I can do is continue to show them that you should love what you do, and when you do it with a purpose and when you're doing it from your heart, eventually it'll pay out. So I think that even though I may not have been the best mom that they would have wanted, I've showed them how to work with integrity. I've shown them how to show up, never give up, and be persevering. And that's the only thing that I would say that kind of keeps me a peace of mind and sometimes comes down the huge feelings of regrets that comes with that. So something that I wanted to share that we get pulled into this many different directions,

31:57and we should pick and choose which are the three, four, five things we can actually, or we really want to invest our time in. I'm trying to work on that now, like really allocate my time to what's important as opposed to try to be everywhere. I've talked with maturity and lots of mistakes, right? Yeah, well, we're human. We're going to make mistakes and it's okay. It's just the important part is that you're learning. You recognize it and you try to do better the next time. And you know, everything we go through, I firmly do believe, is for our best interest. It just doesn't always feel. Even the hard things that we kind of, you go through and you're like, you know, I've gone through and I'm like, what the heck, God? I don't understand that. It was for my best interest. So I truly have loved this conversation, Millie. Thank you for coming and being my guest and sharing your amazing wisdom and expertise with the listeners.

33:02Before we close today and we say hello, huh? Are there any last minute thoughts or words that you want to share before we conclude today? I would like to say to everybody that's listening to this right now that if there's one thing you have to work really hard at, if you're not there yet, it's really figuring out your identity. It's for me, it was a game changer and always try to look at yourself through the eyes of a loving God if you believe in Him. Or even try to look at yourself as you are right now, what would you tell your young self and talk to you that way because I would have been mean to young little Millie. I would not tell her mean things. I would encourage her and I would say, you are special. You are loving. You are kind and those are your true, your true gifts. So go discover those.

34:03If there's something you're going to work really, really hard at, it's really identifying your identity, flipping those bad definitions that you have adopted either you self speaking to yourself or you have heard from others. That's my encouragement to end and then give a purpose. Your wife's what's going to move you after you find your identity. Such a powerful way to conclude today's conversation. Millie, I hope you will come back and share your amazing wisdom with the listeners. I look forward to another conversation in the future. Thank you so much for having me, Candy. This has been lovely. Like I said, it's always nice to have this kind of meaningful conversations with like-minded people and I have a deep sense of admiration for you too. And I am very grateful that we met and that we are building and nurturing this new friendship that it's going to be for good things. This is truly an amazing lady.

35:04So ladies and gentlemen, thank you Millie for being my guest. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for listening. You can catch this episode. It's resonating. Do it. Download it, save it. You can catch it on brushwoodmedianetwork.com, slash awaken hope. Everywhere Apple has a presence as well as I heart podcast. When you always hear me say, if you're listening and someone's popping into your head, they need to hear it. So share this message, share Millie's information and reach out to her. You're inspiring to do something different, to grow, to figure out your identity, figure out your why, to do something. To ease, you can help you, you can assist you. And she has the heart to transform people's lives. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for everything. And you to listen, oh, and for your information just for the last bit, awaken hope will be having an offshoot. It's going to be tapping into hope. We'll be on I heart.

36:05I've not I heart. Excuse me on Roku as well as Amazon Fire. That will be rolling out sometime in August. Amazing. That's great news. Thank you so much, Candy. Hope to talk to you. Yeah, you'll be back. You will be back. So thank you. Ladies and gentlemen, take care. Bye. Thanks for listening to Awaken Hope with Candy Campbell. If you find yourself struggling, just know there is help. Please take the first step in contact Candy. To learn more, go to CandyCample.net. If you like our show, please tell your friends and family to listen. Join us again next time for Awaken Hope with Candy Campbell.