What’s really behind your child’s gender confusion

0:30Is any person in your family or your youth group struggling with an identity problem? As your teenager approached you about questioning their gender, or are they struggling with homosexuality? If so, this is a conversation you need to hear with Denise Schick as we talk about her book on navigating faith-based conversations on the LBG-TQ topic. Welcome to the 10 Penny Files, everyone. I'm Dr. Sherry Tempani. I'm your host. If it matters to your body, your freedom, or your future, we talk about it here. There's something new every single day. So please join us daily. We talk about politics and history, astronomy, pets, travel, farming, food, fitness. And of course, we talk about vaccines and health policy. And at least once a week, I have a conversation with a pastor or an author who writes about faith and biblical principles. Let me hear every day Monday through Friday at 3pm Easter on the 10 Penny Files. As we hear from voices that have been ignored, silence, and censored, I try to bring you

1:33controversial topics so that it will give you, will broaden your perspective and give you something more interesting to talk to about your friends, family, and at the gym. So before we begin today's episode, I want to encourage everyone to become a 10-penny prime membership. We put out a lot of effort for this membership so that we make it really worth your while. And we hope that you will get, because we know that you'll get exclusive content and educational presentations just for you. So to learn more, go to primemembership.dr10pennie.com, primemembership.dr10pennie.com to learn more and hopefully join and support our work. And one last thing, welcome to all of our regulars and our first time listeners. I'm really, really grateful that you're here. Now with that, let's get started. Today's conversation is with Denise Schick, author of Grace and Truth, navigating faith-based LGBT conversations with youth, a user guide that helps Christian parents, youth leaders, and teachers engage in truthful but grace-filled conversations with young people about the LGBT

2:39topics. Denise, welcome back to the 10-penny files. You know, you were on my show in 2025, my Happy Hour show, and you've written two other books called My Daddy Secret and Transgender Confusion, a Biblical Q&A for Families, that were really quite comprehensive. Tell us what led you to write this most recent book, Grace and Truth. Yeah, thanks. I'd love to. Quite honestly, we had received countless calls, requests for some type of resource to work with teenagers in regards to the LGBT issues. And I'll be honest with you, when you talk about teenagers, it's like their vocabulary's different, you know, how they perceive things. I love doing children's books and in adult books, I'm writing those resources, but this was a little bit scary. But I will confess that after hearing from a Christian school in the state of Tennessee, it was afterwards where the Lord just, you know, basically saying, are you going to do

3:42this or not? Meaning, are you going to create a resource for people to use to reach the teens? So through that conviction, I reached out to my editor, let her know what was on my heart, and we discussed what the layout would look like, all of that. And as nervous as I was, the further that we got with creating this resource, the more I loved how the Lord had really formatted it. And we were discussing that before the show. It's easy. As you said, it's like a handbook for parents, for youth leaders, Christian schools, to start these conversations and to be able to present it through real life stories, which nobody can argue when you have people that used to identify as gay or transgender, why, and yet to have the questions, reflective questions, to ask the teens, to have these conversations

4:45along with other different articles that I've written to help with further detail. Yeah, it really is a great manual. I can see where teachers or youth leaders or youth pastors or just parent groups, you know, just parent groups that could get together because of the way that it's written, you know, topically down the table of contents, for the listener, it has different types of topics all the way down the table of contents. So that if you're, there's a particular issue that a teenager or a young person just came to you with, you can go and look for something that's similar. And then there's great questions, there's great follow-up questions, there's encouraging words from the Bible in the scripture about what this is all about. And then follow-up questions and follow-up to the story. So it's a really uniquely written. I haven't ever seen another book in the style that it's written about the story, the questions, the follow-up, the biblical lesson, and you know, what do the Bible say about it and even

5:49follow-up questions to that. So people can go down and find what they need, literally just from the table of contents. I think that that's really amazing the way that you put that together. Thank you. You know, is there any reliable scientific research that says that a person was born into the wrong body? I mean, we know what that, what God said that, you know, the first there was made man and woman, he didn't make, you know, 66 different genders. But is there anything in the scientific literature that supports where these people are coming from that they were born in the wrong body? No, there is not any scientific proof of such a thing, you know, that when we look at the differences of our bodies as male and female and how God had created us, it really goes science matches the word of God as he created us male and female and in the scriptures

6:50match through true, genuine science. It's the fact of what one believes in their mind. You take somebody that's anorexia and they look in the mirror and they look at themselves like they're 250 pounds when in reality they could be down to 75 or 80 pounds. So we look at in a sense the confusion, the trickery of the mind and what that person is believing about themselves. The fact is again with science, Dr. Penny, is that the male and female body, 10, 10, where their difference is the males have more of the cells for the hairy arms, you know, the hair on the chest, the women don't have that biologically. Men are actually more prevalent to be diagnosed later in age with Parkinson's disease, where with women after we go through menopause, we are more at risk for stroke.

7:54So there's so many differences of our bodies even in how they absorb medications. And again, that really matches that God had created male and female. You know, that's really interesting because when people talk about, you know, male and female genders, I think you're the first person I've heard talk about the body here. As the difference. And that's really true. And I don't think anybody's really pointed that out before, you know, about the body here difference. I mean, we think about beards and facial hair, but not about the whole rest of the body. So I think that's another really good example of the distinction between men and women. But why do you think that so many people, so many young people are seeking to change their identities today? I mean, the analogy you just gave about anorexia, I think, is a good one. But why are so many young people, youthful people so confused about this and think they were born in the wrong bodies?

8:55Well, I think there's greater awareness today that is geared towards acceptance in society and becoming more open about different identities. How one might identify, especially around gender and sexuality. The representation in the media and education and online spaces helps young people to see the possibilities, even though they aren't good possibilities, but the possibilities of how they might want to or feel that they identify with. When we look at the safer spaces and community support, you know, online alone, they can find their own community. If one does not feel like they belong with their peers or in comparison, there's a decline of the stigma and keeping it a secret than in past years as well. And the developmental exploration that is suggested, no matter what age, we look at preschool

9:58and kindergarten and all those ages where all this begins to have one question, who they really are in regards to female or male or gay. You know, you tell, there's a lot of firsthand stories in your book. And I think that you said that that's kind of where the idea came from. And a lot of firsthand stories about that they were gender confused or whatever. And a lot of them is reading through your book and reading through these stories. So many of these kids were abused in one way or another, either physical abuse or mental abuse or emotional abuse. Do you think that has a lot to do with their identity problems today? I do. And I would like to say that not everybody has, you know, experienced some type of abuse or perceived a certain traumatic event. However, the greater percentage of people with gender confusion that I have found in over 22 years of ministry would suggest, yes, there is some type of abuse that they have

11:04either experienced themselves or they have witnessed in a way that has filtered their perception of male or female. Yeah, I think that that, you know, because the first couple of stories that were in there were about, you know, their parents, their father was very abusive to their mother. And so they felt that as a, as a girl that they were just an object to be abused. So maybe it would be better to be a boy. And so you're, you think that sometimes it's an observational thing instead of a, of a, of a, what actually physically happened to them. Do you know much about the gender affirming care centers? I mean, I've often wondered if most of the employees there that are just so into this, these radical transformational irreversible surgeries, if most of them have gone through these transitional surgeries and experience gender, gender dysphoria themselves. Do you, do you know anything about those centers or have any?

12:06I don't know anything for a fact, but I could go with assumption of what I've learned through others. And that would be that there's, there always seems to be somebody or somebody's that have gone through that confusion themselves and have decided to affirm what identity that they have taken on. And that's why I believe we've seen such a push through the years through the schools we have school counselors that are gay or, you know, gender confused and where they create this confusion because they're looking at themselves when they were a child. If only I had, you know, and so they can allow that or in a sense encourage that for the younger ones because they feel that it was something that they did not have the opportunity or the affirmation of. You know, it's, there's so much that has happened that is so radicalized in that community. You know, when I was growing up and I'm old enough to remember this, you know, the girls

13:08that played baseball and played, you know, with the boys and, and drove, wanted to play with trucks and bicycles and things like that. They were just called Tom boys and boys that were a little bit more sensitive and like to read and write and maybe play piano or play an instrument. I mean, it was just expressing their creative side. It wasn't that or sometimes the boys were playing with dolls because they had three sisters and they wanted to play with their sisters and so they were just playing with the dolls just because they wanted to play. What happened to that normalization of kids? Where did that go? Yeah, that's, that's a great point that you bring up. I know my next door neighbor, Jody and I, we used to play in the sandbox with the box, little small box cars, you know, and all of that. But I never thought of either of us that we were born in the wrong body. We were Tom boys. We climbed trees. We went into the woods and, you know, did things that the boys did. I think what's happened is that, you know, it's so funny because the LGBT will say, well,

14:12a boy or a girl can do anything. Okay, but then if a boy is very artistic, maybe you're gay. If a girl is in the sandbox with cars, maybe you're supposed to be a boy. So they create this type of confusion. They twist the truth of the reason that the child is just simply playing. And really it, whatever truth that is being twisted, it only further twists the mind of the child. If somebody would have told myself at five and six years old in the sandbox, I would have thought, no, you're wrong. But today, when we have schools that have in the past, at least ask the children on Fridays, what gender do you identify in? Do you still identify as a boy? Do you still identify as a girl? You know, that would make me feel as a child like, oh, something must be wrong. Because they're asking me again and again and again. And so in a sense that that is abuse on the child.

15:14I, you know, as a physician, I just cannot get my head around how these physicians can think it's okay to do these mobilization, irreversible surgeries. I mean, irreversible. I mean, when you take off a little girl's breasts, you can't sew them back on. When you take off a little boy's penis and testicles, you can't sew them back on and create all the, and all of the terrible things that have happened. I've had quite a few guests on the show that are, that are detransitioning and, you know, have such deep regrets about the things that they've mutilated their body with. Have you, during the research for your book, a talk of the teenagers, did you have the opportunity to talk to any physicians or anybody that was in that industry actually doing those surgeries? I have it with those that do the surgeries. However, I have a handful of licensed psychotherapists and psychologists and such that I've

16:15always referred to and that I have worked closely with. And, you know, just knowing the stories of those that we have worked with personally that had detransitioned or no longer wished to, you know, identify as they have in the false identity phases of their life. And so, understanding, as you said, you know, you can't sew those parts back on. And I think about the males that now have returned to their God-given gender. They have worked on the stuff, on the trauma, on the issues, the hurt and pain that had brought them to that conclusion that they should have been a woman. And they seek to have a wife, but they know sexually and they grieve that, but sexually they could never please a woman. So, this book is, you know, it's written. It's primarily targeted towards teenagers. Why did you specifically target teenagers?

17:18Is there, you know, instead of, you know, older or younger or younger group of people? Well, we have our children's series that is therefore younger children that might come home and say, I want to be a girl or, you know, maybe Sally, a friend of theirs in school, all of a sudden wants to be Sam. So, as we have worked on those resources and we're coming out with our new one just with a matter of about a week titled, My New Neighbors, addressing LGBT. We have resources for younger children and then we have our adult resources. But the teenage group is something that we've had missing. And as I, you know, it said it just was the Lord convicting and saying, you know, I spoke to you a couple times about this. Are you going to, you know, do it or not? And I know the Lord and he always speaks to me in threes, you know. So on that third conviction, when the Tennessee School had reached out, I thought, it's time, Denise. It's time. I often can, I can often see, you know, God sitting there

18:23with his arms, a club crossed in his fingers tapping like Denise. Denise, listening. I know this isn't something you want to do, but are you listening to me? So tell people about your other resources. Tell people about your first about your children's series and then about your adult series. Yeah, our children's series began to be developed, I believe, like six years ago, seven years ago. And it was all out of the need to have resources for Christian faith-based parents, counselors, even those in the church that are working with children that are confused or maybe have these situations happening around them to address it in a very biblical way, but in a very storytelling manner as well. They're actually fun for me to work on. So the teenage project was kind of scary, but the children's resources are there. We have, I'm glad God made me a girl,

19:30the boy that liked tea parties, which is more of an artistic stylish minded young fella, an amazing Amanda, do superheroes play piano. So they're fun titles. All of our children's books, actually, all of the resources that I write have been overseen by those Christian psychologists, psychotherapists that I've worked with for a number of years. And we're very careful again because these are children's minds, you know, that we are responsible for how we are coming across with the stories. And so our adult books, which is what I've done for so long, I would have to say my favorite ones would be moving forward in hope, which is a 90 day devotional for family members with LGBT loved ones. And then in addition to that book, developed because the Lord asked me again, I was convicted in the Walmart parking lot when I'm

20:31crying and I'm saying, I don't want to do this, you know, but it was creating moving forward in community. And it was a workbook developed from our devotional, but the unique part with moving forward in community is it has DVDs that people are able to tap into by going to the QR codes, where they're listening to different families in each biblical lesson that we offer. I think probably the hardest thing for families is to come out in the open to look for support, to say this is happening because once they say this is happening or they move forward and call you or email you, they've come out of denial. And reality is hard. And where can people find those resources? Simply by going to our website, which is help with the number four families.com or .org Amazon as well has all of our book listings. So it's help for families.com or .org help the number four families plural. So that's really great. You know, you've done, you talk about some sections in

21:37the book about post operative transgenders reporting higher levels of stress and depression. Do they also have higher incidences of suicide? You know, the fact that they've had surge, repost operative, they actually are at the same risk. So the whole idea that if somebody is not accepted, they don't have a good job. They're homeless. That it is only those that would be at high risk for suicide is is not a fact. When we look at 40% of people that transition or just identify as transgender is being under the suicidal percentage of people that consider it. That is pretty high. And that is also with those where their families have called them by their names or pronouns. They have a fabulous job. One individual I'm thinking of worked for an attorney. His family caved into the names and pronouns. He had a great job. He everything about him financially.

22:41And sadly, yet he had committed suicide and lost his life. I think that's devastating. These are, you know, their lives that God had created that man is destroying. Yeah. You know, do you think that there are genetic markers in our DNA that would change anything about the way that people think about themselves or their genetic markers that people can look for to get a test to show somebody say, look, you're a man. I mean, are there DNA things that can be tested for that? You know, that there are not DNA, there isn't any testing. I mean, the testing that they've had done does not again suggest that I was born a man. You know, that I should have been a man. Now, when we take a look at DNA or what we're talking about sometimes is intersex and as a physician, you are well aware of that. People that are intersex, so that is physical. This is,

23:45we are talking about people that are biologically. There is no intersex mix in their body. You know, they either have one genitalia or the other. And so this is where the confusion of the mind or the hurt in the heart. Somebody asked me recently, Denise, what's the difference between somebody that identifies as gay compared to transgender? And this was a therapist. And I had said to him, when somebody identifies as transgender, the hurt in the pain, the fracture of the heart goes deeper than somebody that identifies as homosexual. What do you think that is? I think it, when it really messes with who they see themselves in, you know, that fracture is gone deeper, which is usually because of how they have perceived themselves, how deeply affected, possibly the event that took place against them had occurred. And you know, what I would say to kind of back that up is that when

24:50I look at my father's life, he was known around town as the last little boy. He, his mother was in alcohol, like he was physically and emotionally abused. He did not have the connection with his father that most boys just yearn for and was very envious of his sister who got dad's attention. But he also was sexually molested. I mean, to me, it looked like the perfect storm as a as a as a young teenager and taken a look at everything, the dynamics of my father experience. I thought, why would he want to become somebody else? Yeah, so tell people just briefly, we've just got about a minute or two here before we go to the break. Tell people just briefly about that story about your father and the in the other book that you've written about that. Yeah, just understanding again, you know, everything that he had gone through that he had endured, there was nobody there to help him, actually, his brother had with some friends locked him in the closet and his

25:51sister's clothes. I mean, it was just like one traumatic event after another. And so you look at the hurt and the pain in that heart of that individual and how the enemy comes in and twists the truth of who somebody is or how to deal with the pain by again wanting to leave your own sense of self to become somebody else. But the fact is is that only the Lord can really reach down in and give them the healing that they need and the Holy Spirit to come into that person's hurt and through good therapeutic help. Sometimes the traumatic events that happen with people when I hear their stories, you know, instead of walking two miles a day and I'm not kidding, I'll walk four miles trying to process with this with the Lord and say, what else did you expect, you know, what else did you think would happen with what they had experienced and what they had gone through.

26:53That's really interesting. And just for the listeners, what we were talking about is is Denise's book My Daddy Secret is what we were talking about that her father had invited in her as a young girl that he wanted to be that he wanted to be a woman. If I remember that correctly. Yes, yeah, I was nine years old when my father had shared with me that he wanted to become a woman. Did he go through with that surgery? Years later, when he had left our family, I was actually 28 when he then left to pursue the identity as Becky. And so it was a very painful and long journey as a nine year old girl understanding what dad was doing, what was going on, the confusion that that created in my life by 11 years old, you know, if God made a mistake and dad should have been a woman, how do you know you weren't supposed to be a boy? So the understanding what that's like, the confusion that enters a child's mind by what is

27:55going on in their environment. And the Satan being the great deceiver, right? The liar. Exactly. You know, that can take any situation and say, see, see, I told you, see, wow, well, this is a great conversation. We'll circle back around. We're going to take a quick break here to hear from our sponsors for america.gov.news. So hold that thought. We'll be right back. America, out loud talk radio plays the 10.20 files on the IHART radio network. Monday through Friday at 3 p.m. Eastern. If you've missed any of these wonderful books that I hope you are reading and any of these great conversations. And boy, we've had a lot of them. You can find them. If you plug if you plug in the 10 penny files on Spotify, Pandora, Apple, Tune in, IHART virtual studio or you can go to my platform at dr10pony.com. Hover over the podcast tabs. You will see a window that drops down that says all podcasts. If you click on that, you can then put in the name of the book or the name of the author. We'll take you right to the conversations that we've had or you can put in a keyword and you can

28:57find it that way too. We'll be right back. We've got a message coming from our sponsors. Please pay attention to our sponsors and support them because they support us and allow us to stay in the air and deliver you these great conversations. We will be right back with more from Denise Schick, the author of grace and truth. Navigating faith-based LGBT conversations with youth specifically teenagers, a user's guide to help Christian parents, youth leaders and teachers engage in truthful but grace-filled conversations with young people about the LGBT topics. We will be right back. So for more information, go to drthawk.com and I look forward to meeting you.

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31:59Only when the government boughs to the people will America become great again. But this is Malcolm out loud here. Join me in pushing back against censorship on fellow Americans. White at the top of America out loud.News are the worst. Any voices, one freedom united in the first amendment. Now is our time, my fellow Americans. America out loud.News, liberty and justice for all. Welcome back everyone. Today's conversation is with Denise Shick, author of Grace and Truth navigating faith-based LGBT conversations with youth, a user guide that is super user-friendly and very important for Christian parents, Christian youth leaders and teachers to engage in these truthful conversations from a Christian biblical-based perspective. Let me tell you just a little bit

33:01more about today's guest, Denise Shick. Denise is a dedicated advocate and a compassionate leader. She's the director of both help for families and living stone ministries, non-profit organizations committed to providing support, resources and hope for families facing life's most challenging circumstances surrounding their self-identified LGBTQ loved ones. With a heartfelt passion for service rooted in her personal experiences and a deep desire to make a positive impact, Denise has spent over two decades working tirelessly to uplift vulnerable families and foster community of resilience. Her life's work is driven by a profound belief in the power and hope, compassion and collective effort to transform lives and communities through our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Denise, welcome back to the 10-pony files. Thank you so much for being here and thank you so much for your work. It's great to be back with you. Denise, is it possible to be a

34:03professing Christian and remain in a gay lifestyle as some people are deceived to believe today? You know, someone can identify as Christian and experience same-sex attraction or gender confusion, but it's different when they choose to live in a sexually active, same-sex relationship or a decided transition and live as a transgender person in sense of identifying as somebody else. Now, the one thing that I say identifying as somebody else because really they are manipulating the truth for their own emotional needs as male and female. What happens when we become a Christian is that we repent and we surrender all areas of life, including our sexuality or gender confusion that we have to his Lordship. So it's impossible, really. We hear people say, I'm a

35:10great gay Christian. Okay, you're really identifying with your sin or you're identifying with what you struggle with and that's not what the Lord calls us to do. We're his children. You know, we're part of God's kingdom. It would be like me saying to somebody, I'm a prostitute Christian. Well, that really is identifying with what I do or how I'm living my life rather than as a Christian as a child of God. You know, the Bible has really specific language about men being attracted to men and women being attracted to women and that, you know, it's an abomination to God. And it's in both the old and the New Testament. And I think you bring that out in through you through in through some of your writings in your book, correct? Yes. You know, I love redirecting everybody back to what the word of God says. That is where the truth is. That's where freedom is, right? And if we can't speak as

36:14Christians into the lives of others that are confused or hurting by gently coming alongside of them and saying, I understand that you're confused or that you're having these feelings. But let's dive in and see what the Lord says about who you are. Let's talk about what you've experienced in a non-judgmental environment, coming alongside and really discipling a person that is confused. And you know, I've had conversations with gay couples who attend at church and say that they they're in a sanctioned church that believes that same sex attraction is okay. I mean, how do people justify that? I mean, if people are listening to this and are in a gay relationship and say, well, I really love my partner. We have a very loving relationship and and we love God. How do people deal with that if they've got a pastor that's sanctioning their relationship and not standing on the

37:19word of God? You know, what just come to mind is I wonder what sanctify means to them. What is the sanctification process for sinners? I always like to, I guess I would refer to more of, is it a Bible believing church? If it's a Bible believing church, then it's going to stand on the word of God. It's not going to twist anything or change any of the verb age. That's really true because so many, there's a lot of particularly younger people who say, well, the Bible is outdated and that applied then, but it doesn't apply now when we as really Bible believing Christians know that it's timeless and when God says no, he means no, whether it was 6,000 years ago or whether it was the day before yesterday. Yes, no. And that would almost seem like the Lord would have two different, what do I say, two different sides of the coin, right? Why for some people would it be wrong? And now all of a

38:23sudden because of the 2026 that it's okay. It's okay because it's become a societal norm. And yet that's not the Lord, you say. You know, you include an entire chapter on pornography. Why do you say that this is not a harmless activity? Goodness. You know, when I look at pornography and work and especially with the younger teens that I have worked with with pornography, I don't think they have any idea of how the pixels affect their mind. pornography offers an unrealistic expectation and actually porn, often depicts exaggerated or staged scenarios or relationships that aren't really real or genuine, possibly where consent was given or intimacy. You know, so we look at these pictures and what one does with it in their imagination. Once they see a picture, it is very difficult to forget it.

39:27Now somebody, you could tell me what did you go out to a freezer for and I'd forget, but I'm going to remember a picture more than what I am somebody's words. But pornography actually infects, yeah, it does infect. It impacts relationships and it infects relationships compared to what God had designed them to be with regular consumption of porn. It can make it harder for some people to feel satisfied in real life experiences and situations. It can also lead to emotional distance, reduced intimacy because one is satisfying themselves. So it really takes away from the personal relationships and provides an opportunity to become an addiction where that's all they think about, that's all they crave, that's all they want and it takes them away from real life relationships or a relationship with the Lord because they're so convicted in the sin that

40:29they're caught in. You know, there's a desensitization factor that happens with that too, just like with the violent video games. There's a desensitization that honestly goes all the way back to the Roman Empire. When I was in college, I took, I had a minor in ancient Roman history and so I read a lot of books and did a lot of papers and stuff back then and that because of the colosseum that people got desensitized to the level of violence that they were seeing. So that's why they had to ramp up and ramp up and ramp up the violence to, it was just really disgusting. And what they were doing with animals and that's when they started feeding Christians to lions and when they started, you know, having humans fighting, you know, ravenous lions and they brought in hundreds of thousands of animals from Africa and slaughtered them and threw things up into the crowds and all that stuff. And pornography is sort of the same thing. You know, you get, you have like pornography 101 and then

41:32it's not good enough and then it has to go on to bestiality and it kind of ramps that up. You know, so the desensitization problem is really real and what you said is exactly right. Once you know what you know or once you see what you've saw, what you've seen, you can't unsee it. It's in your brain. So the addiction of the violence and addiction to the pornography is a really real phenomenon that happens in your brain. Yeah, you know, I remember the first time when I found my father's pornography, you know, so I remember where I was. I was up in the attic looking for my summer clothes and, and you know, I opened it up to these women and negliges and different sexual things. So if a child can remember before she's even told about her dad wanting to be a woman, I think that speaks volumes as far as the power of the pictures. Absolutely. You know, are you familiar with Joy Pullman's work? She wrote a book called Faults Flag.

42:34Why queer politics means the end of America? And it represents cultural Marxism seeking to destroy America and it's a call to action to incite permanent revolution against human norms. Do you know her? Are you familiar with her work? I do know her. Yes. And great work. Yes. That just seems to say it perfectly. Yeah, for the listener, that interview and that book made a huge impact on my life. Because I read all the books of all of the guests in my show. And so if you're interested in that, go to drtempany.com. Over the podcast that will drop down and you can put Faults Flag in is the title of the book into the search and read about that. Do you think that most teenagers, because your books are written towards teenagers, but you've also talked to younger people and adults? Do you think that most people understand the idea of what this cultural Marxism is all about? That they support this gay pride movement, thinking it's just about

43:39what happens in somebody's bedroom. When it's really much more pervasive, that do you think that people really understand what it is they're supporting? I don't. To be honest, I don't think they realized the depth of it. Back before, gay marriage was legalized. Everybody at that point was like, well, why don't they deserve? They deserve the same rights of everybody else. They don't want to hurt anybody, you know, et cetera, et cetera. And I'm not saying everybody's an activist out there. But when we look at what's happened since gay marriage became legalized, you know, and the push for children, and of course you legalize gay marriage, then adoptions become more normal as well for the children to be in that type of environment. There were actually six of us adult children that filed Amica's briefs at the time of the gay marriage topic, a situation that went on just to stand up for child's rights in regards to what they deserve out of our own

44:40experiences that we had. And look what's happened. So then we've gotten, we've normalized the gay relationships, the marriages, the children that are entrenched in that. And then we come after the transgender. We welcome the transgender, right? They're just confused. It's just children. I really believe that they used the children, the LGBT, used the children to get to the heart of America. How could you tell this boy? He's so confused. He's in all this pain. And yet we look at what would the truth do? The word of the Lord says, the truth will set you free. Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's, you know, part of your book, you know, race and truth of what is so cool about the book is there's a story, there's questions, there's the biblical truth of that reflexive story. And then there's a follow up to the story. Now I have to admit, I didn't read every single story in your book, but almost all the stories start with they're confused and

45:41then they become saved and they learn, they meet the Lord and then they change. Did every story in your book change? Did people change? Yeah, they all, you know, they were willing to do the hard work. And I said that it's hard work. Any of us that have experienced a traumatic event in our life, whatever size that traumatic event had and how that played a part of our life. So it's a lot of hard work, diligence, uh, and to continuation and yet to release that to the Lord to work through into process. All of that is real dedication and to see each one and there's countless people out there that have gone through the healing. Not everybody is called to be a public speaker on it and to give it public testimony. I was gay or I was transgender or whatever, you know, however they identified. And so for so many years, people would say, didn't he, why am I not here in the stories you're you're suggesting to me one on one on a phone call? Not everybody's called

46:46to that and to be quite honest, if I was gay or if I was transgender, I don't know if I'd want that public knowledge either, especially when I have colleagues or, you know, those that know me around, I don't want to be known for that. I'd rather be known as a child of God. There you go. Or at least be known as Denise and that be Denise, the transgender. Exactly. Yes. Exactly. So what advice would you give to parents who has a child who comes to them or is starting to act like they're gender confused? What advice would you give to parents if they have a child who's confused about their gender or about their sexuality? Well, I think, you know, first of all, it's going to depend on the age that they have a child. If we look at a younger child, you know, ask them when did you begin to feel that way? Did somebody suggest that you were? You want to try and understand if there were some outside influences that have created this stirring in their heart and in their

47:46mind? Relationship. So as you begin to ask questions and dive into, you know, what are they listening to? What if any social media are they on? Where are they getting these messages at that could be impacting this statement that they are saying? If the child is gender confused, it is so, so, so important for that same sex parent when possible, because I know there's, we've got single parents out there that if it's a son for the dad to take a look at his work schedule or just the way that he relates to a son to look at the whole dynamics and how can he spend more time one on one with that child? How can it doesn't matter? That child would be better off with an hour of dad's full attention than to have, you know, 15 minutes here, 30 minutes there through the day and say, well, I spent 10 hours with my child. How much of that was one on one? We're intentionally that time

48:50was spent connecting with that child. And the same thing for moms, I love to use this story. We have four children, two boys and two girls. Now, my daughters were so opposite of each other. Our oldest daughter loved ballet and tap and dance from kindergarten until she graduated from high school. She was in dance. The younger daughter took three classes of dance and she'd come home one day, outside, underneath the tree, and she said, mom, I'm not a girly girl like my sister. She'd rather go out and learn about cars. She would rather learn to target shoot with her dad. There were all these so tomboyish, right? And so what was important is that as she was growing up and still interested in things that I don't really care about cars, I'll tell you, I have a white one, is it a car or truck or what? I've had to get interested in what she was interested in. And so I

49:51think that's so important for parents. You might not know anything as a dad about piano lessons, but I am going to suggest to you become interested and help that child develop where their interest, where their skills are, because God had created them in a different way. If there was that that's really, really great advice. It's really, really great advice, because I've had people on the show and they've talked about the number of hours per week that one-on-one parenting happens and the numbers are dismal. I mean, they're like in the single digits compared to 40 hours a week of indoctrination in a public school system. Exactly. It's very, very different. And so that's really, really, I mean, if you're going to, just because you can have children, doesn't make you be a parent. And to learn how to be a better parent, if you don't have those skills, if you never had, if you didn't, your parents didn't have good parenting skills, you know, where do you learn it? Well, you can learn it from books or classes or movies or YouTube's or something like that of how to interact and be a better parent because

50:55that's definitely a skill or you can get lots of instruction by reading your Bible. You can get a lot of instruction there. In just a few minutes that we have left here to today, Denise, what would you, if people weren't, if people didn't take the time to read your book, grace and truth, what would be the one message you'd want them to learn, want to hear if they're not going to take the time to read the book? If, you know, if anything, I would like them to hear what children so often do not hear from us as parents and definitely not in the culture, is to remind them that God loves them. They are uniquely loved by their creator, that God also chose them. When we look at children and what are they missing, it's so often the value of who they are, when we can give them an idea of being a child of a king, you know, that they are a masterpiece, just as God had created them, just as I had said the differences with my daughter,

51:59our children are not designed as he had designed us and many times they don't have the same interest we do, but they are still a masterpiece and to remind them that no matter what they face in school, in society, that they can be victorious in Christ, that he will give them the strength and the wisdom to work through the circumstances that maybe they face in the in the classroom with peers or even in their own gender or sexuality, confusion and struggles, but they can be strong in the power of Christ, you know, without Christ's strength, Gali, I don't, there's so many different things in ministry that I wouldn't be doing, but if he calls you to something as being a parent, we can be strong with him with us, with him guiding us and to teach our children of what that's like to rely on God's strength in those challenging times. Just love your children,

53:01spend time with them, you have to spend time with them, if grandparents spend time with your grandchildren, being in influence, where you can be in influence, and so often that's just through relationship. What great advice that is, Denise, thank you so much for being with us here today, thank you so much for your series of books and all the work that you're doing at Hope for Families, because I think that's just amazing and with your new book, Grayson Truth, I think it's just wonderful. So I want to thank you so much for being here with us today. I want to thank everybody who's joined us here today or in the future. You can find this book, Grayson Truth, by going to bookstore.drtempony.com and you can put that into the search. You can also put Denise's chick into the search and I want to thank everybody for joining us here today. So I'm going to close with one of my favorite verses from the Bible I close on my podcast with, which is Romans 12-12, rejoice in hope, be patient in trouble, and be persistent in prayer. We'll see you here again tomorrow or the next time on the 10-20 files. Have a great rest of your day everybody. Goodbye and God