Extra Funny | Sick Sticks | September Thirtieth

0:00I want my kids to grow up healthy, successful, and protected in this world. That's why I help them manage their feelings. It matters. It keeps them whole and free from toxic stress response. Learn more at firstfivecalifornia.com If you're looking for the best blanket ever, you have to try the bubble cuddle blanket from CozyEarth. It's incredibly soft, plush, and it's perfect for a nap on the couch or just watching TV at night. I love how warm and comfortable it feels without being too heavy. And right now you can order yours at TJRiggins.com slash deals and use code TJ to save 21%. That's TJRiggins.com slash deals code TJ for 21% off. Everyone knows we work these crazy morning radio hours, but somehow I've always been a really good sleeper. And TJ has always been jealous because he has such a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Well, TJ, I'm finally letting the secret out. I've been using Dreamwell from More Labs. It's a sleep drink and it's got glycem, lemon balm, melatonin and some other calming ingredients.

1:01I take one about 30 minutes before bed and it's become part of my nighttime routine. And now I'm sharing my secret with the radio family. Go to TJRLShow.com, click on the deals tab and use promo code TJ to save 25% on Dreamwell from More Labs. The regular recommended daily dose of funny is just not enough. Thankfully we have extra funny with TJ and Reagans. So I've been thinking about this story that I'm going to tell you off for extra funny all the morning. But actually all day yesterday too, because it's something that happened to me yesterday. And I couldn't tell it on the regular radio show. But yesterday was one of those days where I packed up all my stuff and went and set up a little workstation at the cigar lounge. And usually when I get there, they haven't been open very long for the day.

2:01I'm probably the only one and there may be one other guy that's old hanging out. So I went in yesterday and they're etiquette, aka etiquette. At a cigar lounge is when you go, you buy a cigar. If you're going to sit there and smoke, buy a cigar from. You don't have to smoke the cigar that you buy, but you have to buy it. Some places will charge you a cutting fee. Like they do at restaurants and all with a cork fee if you take your own bottle of wine in there. But this place doesn't have that rule and they're not really strict on it. But it is common courtesy. You don't want to go and just use somebody's place without spending money in there. So I went into the giant walk in, human or the one of the managers was in there. And she's a woman that is probably a little older than I am, maybe 60.

3:01And everybody there's really nice. But she's telling me about, she's showing me these new cigars. They just got this new line from this company called Partigus. And she goes, look at this. I tell you, I had this and this was so good and it's full body, but not like new full body. This is like an old school full body cigar. And she puts, it comes in a tube and she pulled it out. And cigars, if you're talking about a single cigar, they call it a stick. It's a price per box or per stick. So she says, have you ever seen a more beautiful stick than that? And my third grade, since the viewer kicked me. And it is a Maduro rapper, meaning that the leaf on the outside of it that holds it all together, the rapper is really dark tobacco.

4:05And she goes, I mean, look at that. Look at that. Is that not, I'm telling you that, is that not a beautiful stick? Have you ever seen a stick that looks, is that beautiful? Yep, saying it. And then she goes, and I mean, I love it's delicious. She said, that is a delicious, beautiful dark stick. It's just so. You didn't realize, I guess. And after I, you know, I'm standing there and now I'm thinking about it in that way, there's no way I can put that in my mouth. Well, you had to try it. It was a delicious dark stick. Well, I'm going to go back and get it. When I go for the next little remote office setup thing, probably today. Today or tomorrow, I'll get that. I'll get that delicious, beautiful, delicious dark stick. Yeah, you got to know. Now I want to try it. Yeah, you do. I mean, yes, I do. But something really embarrassing happened while I was there.

5:08So I'm set up at this, they have it like a long, it's not like a long table, it is a long table. And it's made to be a workstation because in the middle of it, it's got outlets and charger ports and things like that. So I'm the only one in the place when I get there. And then after I'm there for a little bit, this guy comes in and he sits in a lounge kind of chair right here. So I'm at the end of the table and then he's right here, maybe five feet from me in a diagonal situation. And they don't serve food in there, but you can have food delivered. You can bring it to bring take out in there and eat if you want. Well, I had packed, you know, just a little snack bag. I had a fit crunch protein bar. And then I had some, I had a couple of meat sticks, some chunks. It's a chomp style meat sticks and some peanuts.

6:11Some dry roasted salted peanuts. Don't you dare bring me a lightly salted or a no salt peanut? Don't you dare. Don't you dare. I want full salt and damn a sea salt too. I want full table salt rolled in them peanuts. Anyway. So I mean, and I have a big bite of that meat stick and I'm chewing it and it's almost completely chewed up. But they're not because of the skin on them. They're hard. You can't just chew them fast and swallow it fast. It takes a little bit of work. So I felt and it was just like one of those chain reaction things when you get the urge and then boom. It has no delay in a sneeze. The mouth is full of chewed up beef stick, meat stick.

7:11Oh, yeah. And I've got nothing. I don't have a napkin or anything because I'm just eating snacks. I mean, I need a napkin for snacks. And I had to just, and I just, in my hands. And it went all in the guy goes, bless you. And then I have to get up to go to the bathroom because I've got. You know, look, looks like I've just, you know, put my face in a meat grinder. Yeah, that's everywhere. Yeah, that's the worst. I know. And you're trying to keep your mouth shut. And keep my hand over. So nobody sees what I was going on here. So I've got a spit and snot and chewed up meat stick all in my hands. And then all over my mouth. I'm sure it was just stuck in my beard and the whole thing. And so I'm trying to ease back so I can kind of sneak off to the bathroom. So it's not so obvious.

8:11But the floor in a cigar lounge is always hard. They're not going to have carpet in there because you got ashes falling on us. And the chairs are, are wooden. So there's no way to slide this chair without it going over that floor. Yeah. And it was loud and then he looks up and there I am like this. And he knows that I just sneeze because he said, bless you. And he's thinking, what in the world? This guy's probably just not bombed all of it. Which would have been better than if I had told him I had meat. Yeah. Shoot up meat stick all over the place. You're like, sorry, I just threw up in my hand. Yeah. Now I'm going to throw up. That's disgusting. I know it was nasty. I've done that before too. And it's the worst. Because there's no warning sometimes. It's just, uh, well, and you know, it's hard because when you sneeze, you, and you've got something in there, you try to keep your mouth shut. And then your ears like pop because you're not open in your mouth to get it.

9:12I was just like, what am I going to do? Classic. Everything bad. Like this guy's a train wreck. I should have think of it. The hell's wrong with him. No wonder they kicked him out of the office. He's thinking, oh, guys, why is he working in here? Meat face. Yeah. Hey, what's up? Meat face. Meat. What's up? Meat mouth. You get that beautiful meat stick. Oh, that beautiful dark meat stick. This is T.J. Riggins Extra Funny. Everyone knows we work these crazy morning radio hours. But somehow I've always been a really good sleeper. And T.J. has always been jealous because he has such a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Well, T.J., I'm finally letting the secret out. I've been using Dreamwell from More Labs. It's a sleep drink and it's got glycine, lemon balm, melatonin and some other calming ingredients. I take one about 30 minutes before bed and it's become part of my nighttime routine. And now I'm sharing my secret with the radio family. Go to T.J.R.L. Show.com, click on the deals tab, and use promo code T.J. to save 25% on Dreamwell from the channel.

10:17Dreamwell from More Labs. Want to be part of the T.J. and Riggins Show? Head to T.J.Riggins.com and check out our feedback feature. Answer fun questions, share your thoughts, and join the conversation with the radio family. Your answers could even make it onto the show. Visit T.J.Riggins.com and make your voice heard. Get the T.J. and Riggins Show all in one place. It's the new media center at T.J.Riggins.com where you can watch, listen and catch up on all your favorite content whenever it works for you. Full episodes, clips, and more. Everything is just one click away. Thank you for being part of the new radio explosion. Now back to T.J.Riggins Extra Funny. Hey, thanks for listening. I saw this story at Six Flags Magic Mountain, which is in California.

11:22Let me make sure I got the wording right so I don't get sued. And I'll tell you why there's a possibility that I could get sued in this story if I say it incorrectly. Let's see. Six Flags Magic Mountain will permanently close one of its most popular and iconic attractions after a slew of injury complaints. Then the headline in the Hollywood Reporter reads Six Flags Magic Mountain to permanently close X2 Coaster after more brain injury claims. Now here's the thing, roller coaster freaks, that would only enhance their desire to ride this thing. It's giving people brain injuries. That's how awesome this roller coaster is. But do you know that the Six Flags headquarters is in Charlotte?

12:25I did not know that. Yeah, because they own caravans now. And so they move their headquarters to Charlotte except now they're moving their headquarters back to Arlington, Texas. Oh, that's okay. Well, the way I found that out is you remember in turn Leah, in turn Leah, wretched out to me the other day and was wondering if I had heard of anybody looking for, you know, she's looking for a job because she worked for six flags and they laid her off because they're moving there. That's what she said, they laid her off because they're moving headquarters back to Texas. I said, girl radio is not what it was when you were in intern. So, no idea. But Six Flags is the first amusement park I ever went to. Six flags over Dallas, or over Texas, what are they called it?

13:26Because Dallas had six flags and then Houston had Astro World. But I don't know if they were in the same company or not. Astro World was that like the Jetsons play on that or no? No, because it was like the Houston Astros because of the space and rocket center in Houston, the NASA. I'm sure all of that space related because of NASA. Yeah. That was enough no interest to you. I'm sure. What? No. No, no. But Astro World wasn't like you go and learn about space. It was it's a regular theme park with rollercoasters and rides and all that. Oh, oh, okay. Yeah. They just called it Astro World because Houston is all, you know, into that because of the NASA headquarters meeting. Yeah. Did you go as a kid to the Dallas one? Yeah, it was about the only time my whole family went on a vacation together. Oh, why?

14:26I was really small. And then one other time I went with my friend. I was the friend that got to go on vacation with the other family, you know. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, it was it was awesome. Yeah. And I just remember that as being there were times when my family would go somewhere for a day or so, but it wasn't all four of us with my brother. And it was usually, I mean, it was one other time that I got my parents to take me to Shreveport because there was an amusement park in Shreveport. And my brother was already a teenager and he didn't want to go. So we went, we spent the night and we went on a Friday. We spent the night at a motel. And then we drove to, it's called Hamill's Park. I believe it was what it was called. And we drove there Saturday to go spend the whole day at this amusement park and it was closed.

15:29Oh, no. Oh, no. Yeah. There's no Google to tell you like that's close to that. Yeah. There was it. There was none of that. You drive up there and see the sign. Oh, damn. I know. Gosh, it's one of the only trips you took as a family. Like what is indicator of things to come like? Yeah. I know. This is awful. It's terrible. But I mean, isn't that typical for me? Yeah. Even back then. Also true. I didn't think about that, but you're right. It reminds me of like the vacation movies. Yeah. Get there. Yeah. What do we do? Then there was a, they called it a water park in Monroe, Louisiana, which is not far from where I grew up, except it was just mainly two big water slides side by side. They did the same thing. But back then that was a water park and it was called Critters Creek. Critters Creek, baby.

16:29Of course it was. Two slides. Yeah. And you had to have a mat to go down the slide. Yeah. In a slide on a mat. Man. And you know those damn things were nasty. Yeah. Slimey. Yeah. Of course. But that's where my love for water parks started. Yeah. There's Creek and Monroe. I think people would be surprised to learn that TJ loves a water park like going down slides like it's so funny. Because it's something opposite of what he would like. Yeah. Exactly. I think it was a water park in my garden too. A clean. Yeah. We're y'all on the show and we went to we took that party bus with listeners to the big water park in Greensboro. We got working with us then. No. Yeah, that was fun. There was. I think it was called Heritage Water Park. Do you remember that one? owned by the guy that my dad arrested.

17:30He was a preacher. Maybe his wife had like big dad. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Jim Baker. Jim Baker. Yeah. South Carolina or in Rockねぇ. Yes. Owned the water park. And I remember going down this slide and you look up and it said 95.1 the edge. Yeah. Ride. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that was bad. I mean, did y'all have where y'all on then? That was in the 90s. No, they had, that was when 95.1 was, what you call, alternative rock station. And they had flipped the format to top 40. And it had been that way for, I think, just a couple of years before they brought us in to save the radio station, which was- Well, it was called the edge still. No, when we started working there, it was called KISS. KISS, okay. Yeah, they had changed it to KISS. Okay, that's so funny. Yeah. But, if you wonder what Lindsey's talking about

18:31when she says her dad arrested Jim Baker, her dad was a US Marshal. I don't wanna miss Bic, I'm pretty sure he arrested. I've heard stories, I don't know. But I wouldn't, I don't know if he, he may have been involved with that, but Jim Baker wasn't a fugitive. So I don't know if your dad would have been, I mean, her dad was there for the Eric Robert Rudolph arrest. And this cult member, this guy ran a cult when he flew into Charlotte. Her dad was there to arrest him and all that. It's a documentary on Netflix about that. Oh, yeah. There's something about Jim Baker. And I only remember that because I related it to the water park in this apartment complex that he said he raided and I did a photoshoot in it. And my parents came to help me with the lilas. She was just a baby because I had to do some photos. And my dad pulled up and was like, this is familiar. And he told me something about raiding this, that Jim Baker, I don't know. I wish I paid attention more, you know what I mean?

19:33Yeah, that would be nice. Your dad is a fascinating person with fascinating stories. And you're just like, okay, take the baby dad. Take that baby. Whatever you want. I don't care about your past. I would love to sit with your dad and listen to some of those stories. I don't tell it. We should get him on a podcast. Yeah. I think you can talk about it now. Mm-hmm. Annie Sahanson, Steve Vs. Got that voice. Yeah. A new Zager voice. It's extra funny with TJ and Riggins. The TJ and Riggins show is on YouTube. Search TJRigginsTV. And don't forget to hit subscribe to watch full episodes, hilarious clips, behind the scenes moments, and all your favorite show content anytime. Hit subscribe and join the conversation.

20:35Everyone knows we work these crazy morning radio hours, but somehow I've always been a really good sleeper. And TJ has always been jealous because he has such a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Well, TJ, I'm finally letting the secret out. I've been using Dreamwell from More Labs. It's a sleep drink and it's got glycem, lemon balm, melatonin and some other calming ingredients. I take one about 30 minutes before bed and it's become part of my nighttime routine. And now I'm sharing my secret with the radio family. Go to TJRLShow.com, click on the deals tab, and use promo code TJ to save 25% on Dreamwell from More Labs. Want to be part of the TJ and Riggins Show? Head to TJRiggins.com and check out our feedback feature. Answer fun questions, share your thoughts, and join the conversation with the radio family. Your answers could even make it onto the show. Visit TJRiggins.com and make your voice heard. Want even more of the TJ and Riggins Show? Join TJRiggins Prime Plus and get exclusive content like the Extra Extra Funny Podcast, now trending plus, and the entire show completely commercial-free

21:36in both audio and video. Get more laughs, more stories, and more TJ and Riggins Show anytime you want. Sign up today at TJRiggins.com. So if you're like me and you've been on the hunt for Lash and Browseerums, what feels like your whole life, nothing ever hits the mark. Nothing ever really works. Well, I have found the holy grail of Lash and Browseerums. Hey, it's Lindsay from the TJ and Riggins Show. And I'm telling you the before and after pictures within three weeks of using this system are incredible. It's called Borbaletta. I need you to go check it out on TJRLShow.com. The results are incredible. And they speak for themselves. Go to TJRLShow.com and check it out. Everyone knows we work these crazy morning radio hours, but somehow I've always been a really good sleeper. And TJ has always been jealous because he has such a hard time falling asleep and staying asleep. Well, TJ, I'm finally letting the secret out. I've been using Dreamwell from More Labs. It's a sleep drink and it's got glycein, lemon, balm, melatonin and some other calming ingredients. I take one about 30 minutes before bed

22:37and it's become part of my nighttime routine. And now I'm sharing my secret with the radio family. Go to TJRLShow.com, click on the deals tab and use promo code TJ to save 25% on Dreamwell from More Labs. Want to be part of the TJ and Riggins Show? Head to TJRiggins.com and check out our feedback feature. Answer fun questions, share your thoughts, and join the conversation with the radio family. Your answers could even make it onto the show. Visit TJRiggins.com and make your voice heard. Want even more of the TJ and Riggins Show? Join TJRiggins Prime Plus and get exclusive content like the extra extra funny podcast, now trending plus and the entire show completely commercial-free in both audio and video. Get more laughs, more stories, and more TJ and Riggins Show anytime you want. Sign up today at TJRiggins.com. So if you're like me and you've been on the hunt for Lash and Browse serums, what feels like your whole life, nothing ever hits the mark. Nothing ever really works well. I have found the holy grail of Lash and Browse serums.

23:38Hey, it's Lindsay from the TJ and Riggins Show, and I'm telling you the before and after pictures within three weeks of using this system are incredible. It's called Borbaletta. I need you to go check it out on TJRLShow.com. The results are incredible, and they speak for themselves. Go to TJRLShow.com and check it out.