Giggling about pranks, perfectionism, and dance anxiety

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1:00What's up my galloping gigglers? That's a good one. We've been really horse themed recently, I'm not sure why. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure why. You created a lot of backlash because everyone's like, we have a horse team in Texas, it's called the Mavericks, you dumb bitch. You can't just say that to me, like you've created a lot of backlash, like that will put me into a literal spiral. That's the kind of backlash I love to have. Like oh my god. I want to let Paige start the podcast because I'm trying to put together the perfect text message. That's a name drop. I'm Maria Sherpova and I'm obviously like everything. It's either like way too lovey-dovey or like not giving it the justice it deserves. How old is she? Is she average?

2:00This the thing. She raised me, but she's only like three years older than me because she won Wemble Day in 17. Is she the youngest woman to when? There were younger like 15 16 year olds. There was a time where girls were winning like pretty young, but she came in and beat Serena Williams in the final Wemble Day at 17 years old and everyone's like a star is born. It was Lady Gaga. How old was Serena Williams at the time? I think in her 20s, but like it was her proud. So everyone was like, oh Serena has got this girl. No, yeah. I'm like starting so processing yesterday, but let's before we get into it. I'm just trying to think like wait, what's the greatest thing I ever did at 17? And I think it was like that was the year that everyone was like Paige can do hair. Like you could do other people's hair? Yeah, but I really couldn't, but for whatever reason I was on the prom circuit. Oh, so you just had good PR. You weren't actually, it was all smoke and mirrors. You got lucky once and then you like ran like wildfire.

3:01I had phenomenal PR in high school. If I could bring back my PR from high school into, I was mysterious. No one really knew. Does she drink? We don't know. Does she have a boyfriend? She's very candid. What was the hair you're going to hairstyle? Like when a girl came up to you, it was like, I need my hair done. You were like, this is the page look. Okay, I'm not kidding. I straight up was a consultant in like my senior year of high school girls would come to my locker be like, this is the dress. What are the shoes accessories in the hair? And I'd be like, you're smokiest, I grat. You're like, okay. Pull to the side cascading. Are you following me? I'm like, not a necklace that will be detrimental to your well-being. It's an earring. It's a larger earring. It's a bracelet and a shoe. We don't see the shoe. It's a clear loose. I would go off. I think you need a consult with my sister, Ma' jeanie because, Lois, she's taking it next level. She refused to wear her soccer jersey because she said it was too big and ugly.

4:03Well, Ben there done that. I quit. I quit T-ball. Okay. What the hell is this? I said no, I'm not going. Lois is me. I am Lois. Well, you want to know what is funny? I got tagged. I kept getting tagged in this Instagram like real. So like finally I'm watching it and it's this mom being like, my daughter's going to her first day of kindergarten and I'm freaking out because she picked out an outfit and I'm scared that the teachers are going to be like, you're a bad mom basically. So I'm like watching this video, watching this. I'm like waiting for the outfit. I'm like, it's going to be something crazy like a bathing suit and all of a sudden I see the outfit. I go, honey, you should take notes from your daughter. That is the perfect first day outfit I've ever seen. It's called editorial. I go, it's giving classy, it's giving professional, but it's giving whimsy, it's giving I can move like, I'm like, I think your daughter's worried about you, babe. I think she's worried how you're going to show up to bring her on her first day.

5:08Now when I was a child, I didn't have that angst because my mom, like she would walk in as like a chaperone for like a field trip and I would be like, you other bitches could never. Like juice, I would literally look at other girls and be like, juicey your mom, look at my mom. If we're not the same here, she's wearing high heels to the apple orchard. We aren't the same. I'll never forget that bitches apple orchard outfit. I couldn't believe she showed up and it was perfect. I can't believe her friends because I literally like two years ago, I started being like, oh, I should put an outfit together. It's been my whole life. I quit cheerleading my senior year because I wanted to put outfits together for the Friday night football games. I literally go, I can't be a cheerleader anymore. I have to be creative. No, you've missed very important Zoom meetings because you're planning your outfits for the week. I'm like, if it wasn't on my schedule, I can't just jump to it.

6:10Oh my god, wait, so when did you fly to Venice? Okay, what day is it? It's Monday. Because I know you had to leave yesterday, but like it all gets confusing. You know we get thrown when Paige was overseas. I flew frasks. Sunday night. I was at 9 p.m. I flew 9 p.m. landed here Monday morning. But really it was like 11 a.m. here, but it was like 5 a.m. your time. I couldn't sleep on the flight at all and that is so not me. So when I was landing, I started like having a panic attack that I didn't sleep. Sleep deprivation and I'm going to like pass out and I'm like, it's going to be so hot and then like I have to take a boat transfer and like what if I get nauseous? Honestly, I'm so dramatic. No, but everyone talks about I'm going to Europe. I'm going to Europe and I'm like, it's stressful. No, my body really does need to acclimate. Here's the thing about Venice and I've only been here for a couple hours and most of it in my room because I fell asleep.

7:11They're not kidding that you take a boat everywhere. I thought it was a bit. I thought it was a full, I thought it was like optional boat and then like you could like, you can walk around. I thought the gondola was like time square like you can see Elmo if you want to. Right. I thought it was optional. Okay, no cars. There's no cars. Did you have to paddle? Well, like you just get like this little like cigarette boat. There's literally spot, it looks like bus stops, but it's for boats. It's the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life. It's, I've never been here before. I am, I feel like I'm in a movie. It's quite literally the prettiest place I've ever been. Obviously, I've been to Capri Abonge. This is a different type of beauty. Like Capri feels very vacation. This is like Italy. Yeah, this is like, oh my god, my ancestors. I was gonna say now you're with your people. I do love that you go to the same vacation every year because it's like no drama. You know, it's going on, but I'm like, let's see some culture.

8:14Let's see some things. My dad would be dying. He'd be like, but Capri's right over there. Why don't we just go? So this hotel room, the wooden clanks on the, like, it's already aesthetic. I'm vibing with it. Wait, I want to like give you, I want to like give you a toy. The audio people love this. The bathrooms in there and then like back there is like the toilet. I'm gonna be honest, the way they set it up. The Feng Shui? Not the smartest. Italians don't do Feng Shui. No, Italians don't do that. I think the bathroom is bigger than like the bedroom part, which I'm like, honestly fine. You could have used that the last of how I vacation. Yeah, I could have used this massive tub that there's two tubs in there. Venice is a very, it feels very honey mounish. Ooh. The only thing is it's you're not swimming in that water. Like I was like, oh, do people jump in this? And they were like, no, that's disgusting. You don't swim in the Venice water. So I feel like it's not like I don't consider that it to be a vacation.

9:17If I'm not putting my bathing suit on and getting going in water. Mm. Anytime people are like, oh, I'm going on a ski vacation. I'm like, you're going on a ski work trip. That's a work trip. Though the shit you got a pack and put on, that's work. Talk about accessories. Don't get me started. We did not, we haven't skied because does Torres ACL because I create for it. And here we are. You want to know what? We probably never will again because now we're with two men that have zero interest in it. They both have new problems. Yeah, if we want to go on a ski vacation, it would have to be just two of us. I think it would be like, we book a show in Aspen and end up being there for like three days and we shop one of the days and one of the days we like drink our chocolate. Done. Glad we wrapped that up. Glad we figured that out. I can't believe you're in fucking Italy right now. I'm so free to eat. I'm like, I can't believe it. I was gallovanting all weekend. Where? I feel like I saw that.

10:18I didn't check your location, but I saw your Instagram story and you were glam and you were here and you were there. No, I was, you guys, this is my my color, the US Open, you know that. And this was my weekend. I did a Lou Lemme party. And then after the party, I went to another party. Who does that? You know what's crazy about friends? You're, you're, this is a pyramid, right? It's definitely, oh, and at the top. Did you ever watch a dance mom? I actually never watched an episode dance moms. Wow, that was really bratty. You got it. Some of the best reality TV. You got to. Um, you're at the top of the pyramid. You trickle down. Everyone knows about you. Everyone talks about you. When everyone asks anything, they have to consider you involved. Anything anyone tells me will be told to you. Anyway. People I'm an imaginary friend, they've never seen me. They've just heard about me. But you feel your presence always next to me. Yeah, it's like a ghost. Some of these people just talk to you when they're with me. They're like, can you tell Paige?

11:20And I'm like, or they'll just ask me about you. And I'm just like, you're a vessel to me. I'm a literal vessel. I'm spiritual vessel. Um, but then I have these like, I have like comedy friends who like have saved my life. Like comedy friends. When I'm with them, you know, when you just feel like, oh, these are my people. Like they make fun of everything. Can I give you a compliment? Yeah. You pick great friends. How many bad people have I introduced you to? Some of the worst people you've ever met, I've introduced you. You have, you always find genuine, nice women. Do you know my mom early on? I remember middle school. I was like complaining about something and she was like, what if you hung out with people who like you? Okay. And I was like, that's heavy. I'm seven years old. That was heavy for the fifth grade. Yeah. That's heavy. I'm like, well, they just don't like me because they don't know me yet. And they haven't seen the sides of me.

12:21Thank you. That's such a nice thing to say. I do think I'm definitely quality over quantity. And also, I am better one on one. I'm not that great in the group setting. Yeah. I have any one you've introduced me to. I've genuinely been like, whether or not like I've kept a friendship with them or not. I've genuinely been like, that's a really good person. A great example is Haley. Haley's a perfect example of someone where I'm just like, that's probably one of the nicest people I've ever met in my life. That's a little angel. It's just the friends who keep around you like their energy. I don't know if this is right word, but it like bleeds on to you. And like I cannot have like dirty, fake, weird vibes. Yeah. Close me at all. It's like, I'm just like really sensitive and I'm excited. Yeah. We're like, I'm like, you can handle more than me. Because you could disassociate. I think she's a sociopath. Let's find out. And like, do you think she'll skin me and wear me and then date my boyfriend?

13:25Let's see. I was saying I was over a year just to get to the bottom of it. I love a fun, crazy girlfriend to live my care. See through, but a lot of them, I don't care what they do. I like when their heart, their heart is there totally. And then I met the comedy friends and I was like, oh, these are my people. Like this is, they are joking about everything. They're able to be self aware and laugh at themselves. I'm like, I love this. But then I forget like I have so many friendships from the tennis world that like I just haven't rekindled because I haven't seen an absolute lemon party. There was this other party called the racquet mag party. The team hug party. Yeah. Party. And I was with Iyan who is Frances Diapo's girlfriend who like played the HEMAs for UCLA. Madison Appell, shout out who was number one for Indiana. Like I'm just with like most badass tennis girls ever. And I'm like, it's so funny how you, you have different identities.

14:28And like in that moment, I was like tennis hana again. I was like, we're just like, we're just, we're just athletes, some former division athletes who have make it their whole personality. I feel like society kind of teaches you, you have one friend group and that's your friend group. And if you don't stay friends with them for the rest of your life, you're kind of a bad person because they've known you. When in reality, I think it's so much nicer to have different friends. Also in your 30s, it's so different having friends in your 20s. Like for sure, complete different life. But it's also funny how many people from the beginning, like come back around because they were like girl, like the people who are meant to stick around will, you don't have to force friendships with people from when you were little. Right. What's crazy with tennis though is like, we weren't friends. We actually fucking hated each other. Right. Like, imagine you, it's similar to you with like all the other models that you'd see in your child modeling, how you were like, I'm trying to put it in your perspective.

15:31I was going to say like when I see people from other reality shows that I have nothing to do with, I feel like we already have a connection because we bolted a reality show. Yes. But back then, like I would see all these girls' names on the draw and they were, it was just like they were standing between me and like my dreams. Right. Oh, okay. I wanted to fight them for a spot. Yeah. The girl that beat me out for the Barbie commercial who then got her own show on Nickelodeon. Yeah. Yeah. They got like a ton of Victoria justices in the room and there were some that I got along with really well, but it was still like looked down upon to like be good friends with girls. It was almost like you were weak, like you weren't tough and you weren't scary. Yeah, you had to walk in and everyone need to be scared of you. And you know that's not my vibe. So if you were at a tournament and it was like you, would you go into like a girls locker room, you would love the vibe of a tournament. Everyone has their own outfit, like you get to wear whatever you want and you walk in and you're with like your dad or your coach and you just wait around for your name to

16:34be called and then you and the girl don't say word to each other, get the balls and go on the court and battle it out. So where are you prior to the court waiting? We're just like in a tennis club. So like you're all just like not talking to each other in the tennis club waiting and like you're warming up sometimes you intimidate people by like doing some crazy warm up. Was there ever like fights in terms of outfits or like she always wears her hair? Like well, there would be like every now and then a girl would like get sponsored by night. So like the girls that got sponsored by Nike or Adidas, like one day they'd walk in like wearing the outfit that like Marisha Povah just wore to you is open and you were like, oh, she's that girl. Oh, okay. She got attention from brands. Yeah. Wow. Okay. Okay. So like she was wearing all the best stuff where sometimes you know me, I'd be sure to say it's tournaments wild. But the Sophie short and like a ripped shirt. Are there any rules on things you can't wear?

17:35I don't believe so. Like you're not wearing a baggy t shirt. I don't believe so. There's some rules like in tournaments where like you can't wear logos that are too big and wimble then you have to wear white, but like Wimbledon, you have to wear all white. You knew that. I didn't. You knew that. Maybe I knew that and it was deep in my brain, but I love that. I think that's why you first fell in love with the sport and you forgot how you first fell in love with it. Well, no, I think I first fell in love that I realized it was all grass. Like it was all greenery. One thing about me, I love a plant. I love oxygen. I go, it's giving wedding aesthetic. I love it. It's giving the background of a brunch wedding. Has anyone ever gotten married at Wimbledon? That's a really good question. It's also very, you like it because it's like impossible to become a member of the Wimbledon tennis club. Like you have to win Wimbledon to be like invited or you have to be like your dad had to like invent London to the street. You like the exclusivity of it. Yeah. So many lungs are short.

18:35I welcome to Rack and Mag party. And you know me, a second I want to party. I'm like, we got to get out of here. Yeah. And then I see some kid, Guy Gary, who I literally trained with in Brooklyn. And he's just like Hannah. I'm like, Gary. And then I'm Gary. I see this guy, Kari, who played on the beacon boys tennis team with me. Runs up to me, gives me a bear hug. And immediately I'm like a kid again, just like a tennis player. Like I could cry talking about it. And I'm just seeing all these faces. And I'm seeing these girls who like, I'm their tennis influencers now, who I follow. And like I know you played for UCLA, like this girl Chanel. And I'm like, I've always like looked up to you. And she's like, I saw your name of the draws too. Like it's so cool. What you're up to. And I'm like, do you know, tennis was crazy, right? We just like had this like out of cult moment where I was like, I know that we never talked to each other before. But like, yeah, I love you. Like I'm so proud of you. Like I'm so proud of these girls. Once like you have children and then you like run into someone from high school in

19:37the grocery store, it's like that vibe. Yeah. You're like, oh my God, where'd your life go? Congrats. No, I was so proud of everyone, but it was just so cool to feel community in like different places because there was a moment where it was just the gig was. That's all I had. Yeah. That's all I was. And that's honestly, that's all I actually want. That's all I need. That's all I do. I actually don't want any outside groups coming in. It's done. The next day I drove to DC and by drove, I mean, got driven. Aiden and Des drove me to DC for wedding. My first wedding of the summer. I didn't know you had a wedding this past weekend. I know. And then we drove back that night. Oh, I know. It was a lot, but a gig where came up to me. She was like, hey, what are you doing here? It's actually is funny when you see giglers out in the wild doing like the most mundane thing. No, she was like, what are you doing? It's this random family wedding right now in Washington DC. That's nice though that Des doesn't drink so he could drive home.

20:38I do have to say shout out to Des and Aiden, you know, they did. What? Aiden put on Dolly Parton the whole ride and he's like obsessed with Dolly Parton and just like saying Dolly Parton and talked about how amazing she is the whole time. Honestly, after 30 minutes, that pissed me off. Two out, two and a half hours of Dolly Parton. Who's part of love part? Okay, she says. By the way, I sat in the back. They sat in the front. They were like, yeah, car ride. I went full Uber driver. They tried talking to me. I was like, no, thank you. No talk. Just you have to lay down your headphones on lay down. Didn't say a word. They were like, are you okay? And I was like, I put no talking on the Uber app. Like please leave me alone. So yeah, the wedding was fun. I do a little dancing speeches. But I just you went to more weddings this summer than me. I'm so sick of weddings. I really, there's literally I don't want to go to any weddings next year. I have one wedding.

21:38My girlfriend, Ariana, next summer in Greece. That is like the only wedding I want to go to from now to them. I did. It was a church wedding too. And I haven't been in church in a minute. Long, long sermons. Can I say something that's like a bit controversial and like people might look at me differently, but I'm just going to like speak my truth. You love a church wedding. I do love a church wedding. I definitely will have a church wedding as someone who like travels with rosary beads. Yeah, obviously I actually was packing my bag to go to the airport. And I was like, Hannah would die laughing. I have like a rosary beads case with rosaries in them. And like a little hankerchief that my grandma gave me that I think was her mom. That's beautiful. So I have that. And then I also have another rosary bead case that has this like little charm lock on it that my grandpa gave me and I travel with both those items. And I used to keep them in my car because I feel like wherever I go, they protect me.

22:42Anyway, that's like a not even. That's a whole nother podcast. That's a whole nother podcast. At weddings. I and like I've been obviously I've been to family weddings. I've been to like close friends weddings. I've been to like I'm the plus one. I don't know anyone at this wedding. It does not matter what the wedding is. I don't feel comfortable dancing ever. I don't care who I'm with. I don't care who my date is. I don't care like how comfortable I am at the wedding. I don't care. It doesn't really ever cross my mind to get on the dance floor. Am I wedding at some point? There was like a crazy grind line where someone's feet were being held in the air. And like there was and you were I remember seeing you just like. You were sitting. I think that's insane. I have a traumatizing wedding dance story. It's not that traumatizing but I just remember I was like 17 and you know like actually that's like the weirdest age to be at a wedding because you're like so weird. You're like I just remember being like I don't want to dance like I was like you want to dance

23:43and you're like oh I tried to dance I think and then I like came down sat down and my mom was on the dance floor and I was sitting with my dad and my dad goes look come on dances. He goes you see how she moves her hips. So you need to learn how to dance and I was like what the fuck yeah maybe it's because I don't think consider myself a dancer like I don't consider myself a good dancer that maybe that's my insecurity but I don't but then I look at people and I'm like okay well I couldn't dance as well. You're like are you doing that? I can't do that. It's not that. I just think it's like I don't know what it is in me that I'm just like I don't want on. No one talks about dance anxiety. It's so fucking real and I feel it the second I hit the dance floor. I'm like everyone's staring at me right now and then I'm like oh I didn't hit that. Everyone's staring at me. Didn't hit that. Oh then I didn't hit that and then like bad bunny comes on and I'm like I don't know of this. I don't know if I can. Yeah I just like feel I feel more comfortable being like at the bar and mingling.

24:44Yeah. Then I do going on the dance floor. You guys know does loves dancing. Does he? He did dancing with the stars in Ireland you guys should all Google it. It's a crazy era in his life. So when you get to a wedding and you see like okay come on let's get on the dance floor. Yeah so then I was talking to a good girl obviously and I'm looking at him. Mill of the dance we're going crazy starting to sweat waving me over. I'm pretending I can't see him and he keeps going. He's going to be me over. I'm dying in that moment and I'm like in a deep conversation with the good girl and I'm like yeah mom is working right now and then finally I'm like fine as I go over the crowd like he's everyone's like yeah come in. They start opening it next you know I'm in the middle of a circle. No and I look at him in the eye like my eyes were scared. I was like I did not sign up to be the middle of the circle. I signed into like beyond the side dancing middle of the circle so scary because only move I have is the worm. Otherwise like what do you do in the middle and you can't bust out the worm at not a close friends wedding.

25:45This is Dez's friends wedding. This is not even my friends. No like my friends. Well anything I do they're like no that was funny Hannah. This is who what the fuck's going on who let that girl dance for. Even though you're his wife essentially as a plus one at a wedding I feel like it's your duty to kind of like I don't think you should stand out. 100% I don't think you get in the middle of the floor and you're commanding the room because at some point people are going to go who is this person. 100% and yeah like I don't need to be dancing you know with the mom and the grandma in the middle doing like they were like Greek and we started doing like Greek I was teaching people like but look if you have fun you have fun and totally there's some people that you should hire for your weddings like that are just really good wedding guests like they add to the vibe it takes one person to make a wedding fun. Hannah I was thinking about that because I was like I don't for my own future wedding

26:47I don't want to kill the vibe of the dance floor and I was like what if I just hired actors that were like dancers that like got people to dance in the Hamptons we met Maurice through Southampton social and he is the most fun amazing guy ever who I stayed touch with and for my wedding obviously he was invited when I tell you he made my wedding. Yeah like Maurice was the DJ the hose the dancer the greed like he did everything was your DJ I don't remember who did your music I got like a cool girl DJ and the music was anyway oh my god it was so long ago Hannah it feels so long ago I was like was that when weddings like I don't even remember you guys I picked the first dress I picked out in a strip mall like this was a different time that was like a fever dream like I do that is great you're married wait I I got announced yesterday they were like and next is Hannah

27:50burner who resides in the Lori side with her cat butter and I was like definitely have a husband wait I have a question does does ever said anything because have you ever had a conversation about changing your last name we've talked about the concept of it but he he knew I mean we've talked about I was like kind of kids have my last name oh would you okay okay you took a one step further okay as someone who has thought about changing my last name my whole life like literally even when I was like 10 years old I'd be like and isn't it crazy I won't always be page to sorbos so different I literally was like my name is burner it'll always be burner and I was gonna take that for me I'd be like what do you think my last name will be let be and my mom would be like I don't know but right now it's just sorbos now at 33 honey I'm page to sorbos I am no one else I am page to sorbos and those kids can have his last name fine I don't really even know those kids yet so I am fine with that but my name I don't want to change it anymore which I never

28:56thought never even if you asked me like five years ago are you gonna change your last name I'd be like well yeah it's so crazy you've changed a lot over the last three years through this podcast I've changed a lot I've changed a lot through this one well I when I did Morgan Stewart I was talking about our tour and how like transformational it was for me as a woman our tour and your bachelor at party were two really bad moments in my womanhood because you did a photo shoot the whole bachelor I just felt myself and you were like I just felt like it was finally a time for everyone to celebrate me yeah it's like finally my time to shine you know I'll never forget that green sparkly dress I think about that green sparkly dress all the time I can't find it you're like finally women embraced me as boy that's truly and you were there people are really listening to the pod from the beginning so what was like and I was like are we like a really fucking stupid in the beginning

29:58and then they like kind of pause and I'm like have we actually evolved and changed at all and she was like that really no and thank god and thank god imagine now imagine we like evolved into like this is like a news podcast or something no even like when we have children like I don't want to talk about them no they're gonna be like does we're like they'll be mentioned yeah like they'll will know about them there's a lot of wellness brands out there that often greenwash their products and that means that they try and make it seem like it's more natural or clean than they really are have you ever ordered something that claims it's going to do something and then it just never does well nature sunshine doesn't just talk about the planet they sustainably source ingredients and craft their supplements with 100% solar powered manufacturing other companies use nature as branding nature sunshine built everything around it pure potent ingredients that are thoughtfully sourced and preserved natural potency I love their brain edge for clean cognitive support it combines traditional your bamaatai with new tropics adaptogens and botanicals that help support

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32:05tiny fibers that are spun together in six powerful cleaning layers to fight odor stains and extra work it's 100% concentrated with no fillers no extra water and no plastic bottles all clean and no fuss just what I want I love finding new products that actually make life easier and tide evo has definitely earned a spot in my laundry routine whether my clothes have a stain or not I'm using tide the new tide evo super concentrated laundry detergent today frutal I've got my cigarette in peddits in more than 50 dollars

33:06Ralph fresh for all and we're back live during a flex alert dialed in on the thermostat oh we're pre cool in before 4 p.m folks and that's the end of the third time to set it back to 78 for 49 p.m. clutch move by the home team put the game plan from here on out laundry not today dishwasher side lined what a performance by team california the power truly is ours during a flex alert free cool power down and let's beat the heat together I went to do this open last night and when you get there now like the us open wasn't like this now it's like you get out and there's immediately a red carpet and someone asked me like interview was like where's page and I was like pages and been asked she couldn't make it she was supposed to be here with me but I ended up watching the Novak joke of itch match and he like puke the whole time wait I saw that on my Instagram yeah I was

34:07we're sitting there watching the headline was like his body betrayed him I was like oh okay but when I do it it's like maybe you're we no I like he walked to the side and I'm like I can see him from there and I'm like he just puffed and does is like there's no way he just poked I'm like I saw a water come on this mouth wow I wonder what was going on dehydration crant who knows but it was like just watching a man maybe he was anxious looks like he was gonna faint like the whole thing so but it was beautiful it was very fun and he lost five sets no in five sets it was a five-hour match we didn't even get to see Venus Williams we had to leave because it was past deserts bedtime oh my god what time did they go on like at midnight also Venus is like in her 40s they made a granite mid-time midnight wait wait wait yeah and then played for how long probably two hours yeah no tennis is the sport is insane like why wouldn't they just be like okay back

35:08tomorrow morning because there's a whole schedule and it affects the whole draw but Venus definitely was like are you fucking kidding yeah I feel like that's it go crazy disadvantage well but no other sport I mean golf takes forever yeah but like it's not the same kind of physical stuff tennis you could you could play a five-hour match just you running for five hours thank you so much for bringing that up because I saw like this this golf thing the other day they're interviewing someone and it was like a golfer that I'd like recognize but I saw an interview with him and I was like oh my god he got so old like I guess I haven't seen him in like years whatever I don't even know what his name is irrelevant but then they were showing like other golfers that are like top golfers right now and I'm like I'm like wait a minute I look in the mirror every single day and I look at my body and I think how could you be better and that's the plate that women have to bear that's the burden that we live with and I'm looking at these men and I'm like never once you thought hmm I'm a professional

36:08athlete maybe I'll lay off the Oreos this week I mean a shocking Hannah it's actually shocking is there another sport where you don't have to be physically fit at all I mean at all these men I'm like how many beers you put down last night that is a crazy gut if I've ever seen one you're only 35 what is your excuse I'm gonna have an argument if you have to wear a belt when you play it's not a real sport and I'm gonna concur with that as someone who's never played a sport but has worn a belt I concur and I love golf but it's it's more of a sport skill than like a full sport I just feel like if there's a chance not saying I would win but if there's a chance I could be you in a race I don't think that you're a professional athlete okay you're very fast you're very fast okay as the fastest girl in fourth grade I I understand that but I just thought it was I was just looking at them and I was like oh my god it must be so nice to be a professional male golfer

37:08because you don't have anybody dysmorphia at all and you don't have you don't have like a body standard you also get to just like fuck off your family for seven hours because you're fuck off doing a job and playing with your boys and then traveling the world and like never calling your kids it's kind of crazy but anyway I recorded a podcast with Maria Sharpeau at the end I'm still processing I saw that on your Instagram so it was a live recording of a pod yeah so your outfit was oh my god thank you it was a Zimmerman set that I found online you looked like a professional tennis player who was coming to give a talk so I'm such a nerd that I was like I know Maria Sharpeau of a fashion style like even in this era of her life like I know what she likes to wear and I was like she would wear this and I walked in and she complimented my outfit and I was like honestly I was trying to channel you and she immediately starts joking she's like I

38:12mean I would have tucked in the shirt and immediately I'm like I fucking love her this is Maria Sharpeau by the way this is one of the greatest tennis players to ever play the game who raised me even though she's like three years old than me if someone ever said that to me I would have started crying no no we immediately start busting you to those balls because look when you meet really famous people they're all kind of energies that you get totally and I you leave the room sometimes being like well like I didn't even make eye contact with that like that was weird that was scary like they really did not want to make eye contact with me and then you think it's your fault like I think I threw up after I interviewed Martha Stewart I was like that was this scary thing I've ever done in my fucking life and by the way Maria Sharpeau is known to be like intimidating on the court that's her whole thing like she never smiles she's she's got the Slavic energy she's she's serious yeah strongest mental she's incredible and I immediately were like

39:15joking and laughing and then I didn't realize it it was her first ever live show her first ever live podcast oh wow there's a so Maria Sharpeau wasn't nervous at all like just like didn't even mention to me just standing there do you think there's any tennis players that take beta blockers I don't know if you could do it like during a physical activity like tennis I don't know if it affects like the oxygen to your brain interesting because I've thought about it but I think they're on like SSRIs for sure I need to know what the professional athletes are doing when they get anxious also where Sharpeau so savage the podcast begins she's interviewing me which by the way is the weirdest thing ever and she goes this is a quote from you I'm now in stand-up comedy but my dream was to win Wimbledon I go okay okay right to the heart so and I just look at her and I go um yeah what was it like to win Wimbledon and she goes felt pretty fucking good and we're just like literally make that so your type of friend I knew

40:22I was gonna be enamored by her I didn't know I was gonna fucking vibe with her like the chemistry was just so fucking fun like I just wanted her not be annoyed by me and then it got into I was like she felt like I was with a sister I don't mean to like make you jealous no it's okay because that's how I felt about Morgan Stewart I'm not Martha Stewart no Morgan Stewart I just did more this to her I was like Martha definitely didn't buy with me that's for sure that's on camera there was disgust to my you but when I met Morgan I was like so nervous and then I was like wait where are your friends I was like we have the same personality when someone makes you feel like you could be yourself how like immediately you stop being a weirdo and yeah I spent an hour with her and like just the effect she had if you google marks on Mars Maria Shaboba yeah her fashion is next level she also came on like she's blonde she's like the six to Russian but she like

41:26knew herself and every girl wanted to be Maria Shaboba growing up did she grow up in Russia or she grew up here she was born in Russia and then at a very young age her parents like put all their money into like imagine being like we're putting everything into this like six-year-old girl and I was with her manager her agent he's been her agent since she was 11 years old oh my god I was like how did you know she was the one he's like I looked at the tense account when you knew you're like she's gonna do it and like four years five years later she won Wembleton wow good for her but it's crazy she's 39 and she's lived so much life yeah oh okay so Chelsea Handlers always been friends with Maria Shaboba and like I would see Chelsea Handler in her box watching her matches and I thought was like the coolest thing I've talked about this but like I just need to reiterate and then we're sure of move on the pod it comes out on Wednesday pretty tough pod but she tells

42:26the story that is so funny about Chelsea Handler which is so Chelsea so childy Chelsea goes to the Olympics in London like 10 years ago with her now for Chelsea obviously this is the vacation this is fun we're drinking pims yeah and she puts her in the players box now in the players box at the front is the coaches who were like coaching right right she says she looks at her players box Chelsea Handlers next to her coach yapping cracking jokes making fun of him drinking probably on drugs um leaving coming back like just chaos and Maria Shaboba was like what is she doing but Shae Repova wins the match and is like superstitious so she's like hey Chelsea you have to do that for the next but like the whole tournament you have to sit there so then Chelsea stays the whole tournament in the finals Shaboba loses to Serena and she said Chelsea came up to her afterwards and said what the fuck was that oh my gosh anyway shout out to girls goes because that is the kind of

43:29support I want to have for yeah shout out to women in sport and women supporting women in sports and Chelsea Handler and Chelsea and by the way Chelsea she is that girl like she's that person who will support you even if she's drunk and that's important and that's important because really important in our society in our right minds because I've had a lot of people who get drunk and don't support me I've had the exact opposite happen in pretty much every relationship I've been in but anyway now I'm trying to put together a text back to Maria Shaboba I don't know what to do but like I'll deal with that on my own time I love that okay awesome thank you thank you thank you for that dissertation yeah I was really excited to tell everyone about it um what are you excited for the next couple of days I'm very excited for the next couple of days Josephine has me has a schedule for me running she wants to see this she wants to go here she wants to try this restaurant we should get pictures over here so I'm just like gonna go by her schedule I flew in a day

44:34early then I needed to be here because I really my body so since I really needed to just like relax and unpack my clothes and make sure I add all my outfits ready and like one thing Hannah there's no shower in my room because they want you to bathe and eat like tortellini there's two tubs next to each other okay oh they want you to hold hands with your romantic partner so there's a bathroom over here right it's two tubs two sinks you think sure where's the toilet you have to come out of the bathroom round a corner there's another bathroom just the toilet and a sink and no shower and no shower I'm like guys you had so many opportunity so many water lines are running through this place we have a bath we have a toilet what should we do with the third walk another bath I can't tell you the last time I bathed I'm not a bather I don't bathed

45:39I'll do a hot tub I'll live in a hot tub you know I try I actually try and take a bath once a month I think it's good coming I come from a household where my mom took a bath every single Saturday let's so came coated she got the bath going she did whatever her like lotions and potions were she shaved she must have been going out that little slut she must have been going out every Saturday night now that I think about it when I was younger and she would do this before going out yes she would like get ready all day on Saturday she'd get out of the tub and then she do her hair and then she do her makeup and I would just like what is she doing but now I like don't remember why is mom's putting on lotion like the most comforting memory I think because that is the first woman you know like so like everything she does yeah everything she does is like low-key

46:40soothing to you you know Maria Sherpova my my your mom my mom no my literal sister Maria she was pretty a lot of times players are perfectionists and she was saying that having a kid she has one kid is the one thing that's helped her with her perfectionism because she's like you cannot control what's going on you can you can plan what you want you can try to make everything go as planned and go right but the kid is just gonna be like go fuck yourself do it yeah do it every month as a non-mom when you hear moms be like it's horrible but it's perfect and it's the worst but it's the best I think it's the challenges of it that actually help you grow I'm trying to figure it out as a non-mom I think god I don't have the bandwidth right now does anyone I couldn't think of the worst thing to happen to me then have a baby today someone said they were like whatever you're going through just be like at least I'm not pregnant

47:42and then tell the key players that are pregnant listening to this you're perfect we love you yeah I'll pour one out for you tonight can we talk about the difference between a home that's furnished and a home that's intentional because if you're still living with a mattress on the floor at 25 that's crazy and cozy is here to help bed frame sofas rugs shelves tables cozy has everything and it all comes in boxes directly to your door cozy furniture is modular so the piece you buy for your current place can reconfigure to fit your next one and you can always add as your space and taste evolves you can swap covers when you want to change and they go right in the wash whenever you spill something if you have no clue where to start they offer free one-on-one design consultations so a real person can help you plan your space no fees so transform your living space with cozy that's cozy e y dot com make yourself at home oh my god guys i've been bingeing the funniest TV show f-x's adults it's about five roommates living in New York i mean

48:45who would ever live in a house with that many roommates they're leaning on each other to navigate love work friendship and family not relatable to me and Hannah at all while tackling pressing questions of your 20s like what if the person who inherited your fake ID is cooler than you ever why does being around your family make you regress into your worst self and how do you tell your roommates that you have other friends f-x's adults all episodes now streaming on hulu you guys know I'm somehow always spilling something on myself the other day i dumped an entire karma latte down the front of my favorite sweater literally as I was walking out the door I was like cool I guess I can never wear this again but I threw it in the wash with tied evo and I was genuinely shocked that it got the coffee stain out so what even is tied evo it's a brand new super concentrated laundry detergent that's built differently to be tied's best clean it dissolves quickly with water and is made of thousands of tiny fibers that are spun together in six powerful cleaning layers

49:47to fight odor stains and extra work it's 100% concentrated with no fillers no extra water and no plastic bottles all clean and no fuss just what I want I love finding new products that actually make life easier and tied evo has definitely earned a spot in my laundry routine whether my clothes have a stain or not I'm using tied evo tried the new tied evo super concentrated laundry detergent today we are cat moms on this pod we love animals yeah so we love pet smart because look pet care is more than a subscription pet parents need a partner for the predictably unpredictable life with a pet they have auto ship they have free same day delivery they have store pickup they have shipping to your house and their store is so much fun have you reparting a pet smart you just go in and go nuts going into a pet smart is like a dopamine hit and let me tell you something as a person who does have a go bag for her kitty it's very important to me that pet smart

50:48is same day delivery because you ever find yourself somewhere and you need a box of litter yeah I've gotten to pet smart to get better some food and then realized she also needs more toys and oh she's never tried this kind of feather toy before these are things that happen when you walk inside a pet smart butter is spoiled they truly are the one stop shop it delivers everything you could need as a cat mom or a pet mom whether it's monthly birthdays and gotcha day bashes which obviously celebrating daffney's birthday is really important and I have it on my calendar visit your local pet smart store or go to petsmart.com today pet smart anything for pets I never talked about about embed with page disorder both this season I had my first episode last week and I had Nikki Hilton on which actually is a perfect example of meeting someone where you're like what is there vibe gonna be and I she was so down to earth and normal it actually was like shocking to me I feel like she's purposely been like I don't want to be in the public eye as much it's annoying me she's like

51:50them one of the most normal people ever like I forget they like asked her to do something they're like is it okay if like do you want someone else to do it and she was like no obvious like I can do it like it was just like I forget what it even was but she was just buried down to earth but this year it's live so it's like the past two seasons we've recorded it for an like an hour and a half so like there were times where I could stop and we could reset and like yeah cut things out at things whatever forget people's names it's a very different vibe this year and so like we're live but like she knows the segments that we're doing and like it's only for 30 minutes so it's actually not that bad so whatever we're chatting and we start talking about Daphne and she's like oh my god wait I have a gift for you and she just like says like can someone get my bag and in my head I'm like wait we're live and the I know for fact the Amazon team is like what do we do and I'm like someone

52:52get her blue Chanel sparkly bag so they get her bag and they bring it over and she's like opening it and she like hands me this gift and I open the gift Hannah she has a jewelry line she made me a ring with Kitty's face on it it's like my new favorite ring and I put it on she goes your fingers are so skinny and I said thank you so much for noticing she goes no no really I'm gonna get you on the fit what is your ring size I've never even I go well it's a four but she goes what like people think I'm lying when I say that but I'm so anyway me and Nikki Hilton have friendship rings with our cats on them and tune into in bed with Paige to Sorbo my next guest in September well it's up in the air we'll see what happens how do you like um interviewing live it's it's more pressure because I feel like there's more pressure on me to like think of something funny after because like it's boring if you're just watching us talk about bed and you're not laughing

53:53so I feel like I have to like add in jokes where when we tape it sometimes I feel like I can think of a joke for longer where when it's live it's like quick and I'm like this is this episode gonna be boring so I'm it's a little bit nerve-racking but I talk to myself for 30 minutes live all the time on Amazon so I know I can be live for 30 minutes but a lot of people are never have never live like when else would they be live yeah how many times can I say live Jesus take a shot every time I feel also like sometimes with comedy when you have a little pressure you could be funnier because you don't have time to like overthink the joke you just have to like get it the first time after it was over I was like great and I never have to think about this episode again because it's already out there like I don't have to be like what are the teasers what are we clipping like it's I love that I love that so that was nice oh my god we've had we had two like crazy weekends

54:55I can't wait to see the Venice footage and we're going to a fashion show together like a cool one next Friday you guys were doing fashion week for a day together heck yeah Friday we're going to the Vita Hoff show Vita Hoff that he excited I've been a fan you wore them on Fallen they're like yeah you know I love it one thing about male love of course it and one thing about you you love Bridgerton and that's where we combined that's where we combine and that's our Venn diagram because I love a little snatch in the waist um but yeah I I'm excited for a day to be running around New York with you I love I love the outfits that really accentuate the female body I think that's I think that's why we love a corset you love like show your curves yeah showing a female body we love it not a golf body not a male golf but oh someone DM me and they said that they're

55:58that all men's body standard is Mark Wahlberg is a wow that actually is a good one but he's also 57 and it gives them hope and it's also inspirational weights you want to hear something funny brahmins golf always they're not allowed to wear shorts they have to wear pants because they don't like their knees someone said my knees are kind of white and pale who was like okay we're gonna play the sport but I swear to God if I didn't wear one wear shorts I'm gonna freak the fuck out golf has so many made up ridiculous loser rules my brothers at the golf stands for gentlemen only ladies forbidden is that true no but like good good definitely believes that what does it say for them he probably made that up but like it's it's probably a coincidence and then like men ran with it but do you know I was I played tennis with my old man the other week and one of them you know I belonged to this like fancy tennis club like you should check it out and he said

57:00what the club was and the other guy was like are women allowed in that club I felt like I was in high school tennis again on the boys team where I was like do I have to fucking beat every single one of you like when do you do are women allowed that it's still real like there are really these old school hamptons clubs like I remember I told you my best friend Becca she's a lesbian and an incredible athlete and she's the first ever member of her golf club that is a woman it's normally the husband that brings the wife so they didn't know what to do with her I don't know why it just sounded like she's not a lesbian because she's incredible at being an athlete she's not an athlete because she's a lesbian okay the chicken or the egg she's very athletic and happens to also be a lesbian but they're not correlated how dare you isn't that crazy yeah that's crazy they didn't know how to like submit her application because they were like but who's the man

58:04and she was like I'm the man what I hate people I really do I'm just like you're stupid that's crazy on a lighter note I just had to yeah thought you know I like to just bring up a random thought on that and my thought was I thought I was gonna have to keep an eye out more in my life for whoopee cushions really when you're younger they really make it seem like they had a time to sit on a whoopee cushion I haven't seen one whoopee cushion in like a decade we want to know what ain't shit funny about a prank these days no one's prank it no one's pranking anymore honey I think I think no one's pranking because shit is really shit it's like it's not funny it's like we're in a haunted house we don't have to like scare people already in the haunted house we don't have to do over time I also think it was pre-phone like before we didn't have much on our phones we were pulling out a whoopee cushion when you got someone on a whoopee cushion like that was game over like I was at the end of the night we were like and that's our closer where

59:07they come from never once do I have a memory of buying a whoopee cushion they just always appear at your house like you never got them they were one was just there blowing it up was disgusting it tasted like a condom and everyone would like blow it up and I was like this is how COVID originated like started originating at least it could be the cause of your UTIs I don't even know but everyone swab-nobbing on it like no one's getting punked these days because life is we're punk we got we got we live in it we live in the show punked and that's just one of those we pranking was like the silliest cutest thing back then pranking is so fun all I did I feel like was like pranks like I remember one time my grandma was like let you can put saran wrap on the toilet and I was like fuck yeah I'm doing it or like putting a rubber band around like the sink so when you turn it on like the spiket thing like sprays at you like yeah that's innocent fun I'm how she'd have

1:00:08aged a good your hunts like an influencer and they were like my cortisol levels can't handle this right now I'm suing I watch this girl make a video I mean so many people have made tiktok's about it but I watch this girl make a video who like I follow and like I've never met her in real life but she truly with her whole chest called herself women like or called herself no needed to use women but use the word woman like okay and there's a lot of woman and I and I I actually was like I can't ever like another one of your videos again because I do dumb shit that's crazy I love how that's where you drew the line I know the videos of the men not being able to read I'm like I also with pranks like we never fake to prank our shit was real nowadays it's like let's pretend that I'm surprised at you my boyfriend at college it props there's all these fake couple prank videos and I'm like at one point after the hundredth videos your husband like is this a prank that you're

1:01:10recording couples and pranks different I feel like very different how so like if that's your whole thing I feel like I would start to like get annoyed but it's fun for like some like randomly doing something or like I love like scaring people like I love hiding behind a door like that is nothing fun I do it when you get your brother have you ever scared your cat no you gotta do it you gotta do it if you have a cat at home do yourself a favor call them hide behind something and kitty dies like she literally gets so mad at me I've fallen on the ground laughing because I've scared or so good she lit she's like a human she's like she jumps back and she looks like bitch are you kidding bring some whimsy to your day find a cat and scare it also I'm stressed about how

1:02:14it means around the corner sorry to bring that up I know what is it but different isn't me for us we're 34 years old when do we stop dressing up when did we stop I also Halloween it like then it's like my birthday is right then anytime someone says Halloween I think of myself even though it's my mom's birthday on Halloween I think of me oh my god you guys are such scorpios I'm like what an amazing birthday gift that must have been she was like just the best you dressing up and taking no me being born oh like it was her birthday and then four days later she had a baby and that is the story of the witch of page disorder how she was created the line the witch and the wardrobe that is me the line the witch and the wardrobe I gotta go okay we're gonna we have to stop we're gonna that's what we're gonna end this thing um we love you guys so much thank you for getting with us and we'll talk to you later bye

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