Why Do I Run From Relationships?

0:00This is an I Heart Podcast. Guaranteed Human. In February of 2024, celebrated illustrator and children's book author, Patre Mathers and her husband Michael mailed letters to dozens of friends and family members to let them know they had died by suicide. Dear Hunnies, this is goodbye. By the time you get to shredder both Petra and I will be dead. Next stop, Wonderland. Why did they do it? And what did it do to the people they left behind? Listen to death of an artist on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What up, this Jay Valentine co-host of the R&B Money Podcast alongside my brother, R&B Legend, Tank. Together we've built a space for artists, executives, and fans of R&B music to reminisce and tell the real stories behind the music. I have no money, I was hood famous. They think you're gonna get everybody out. We lived in a project, and real love came out. They hear them music, and we had nothing. From Smokey Robinson to Mary J. Blige, B2K to Jill Scott. If you're a super dedicated R&B fan, this is where you belong.

1:01Listen to R&B Money from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This season on my podcast, here's the thing I talk to actor, Stephen Root. I'm a people watcher. You see that guy going down the drain though? Yeah, I can use that. And open igloo co-founder, Alia Muhammad. I love staying on top of what is going on in our city. It is on renters minds. And taking all of that knowledge to build a platform, that hopefully is going to make New York City better in the long run. Listen to Here's the thing on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The World Cup is over, but if you caught the soccer bug and aren't sure what to do now, check out our podcast Big Kick Energy. I'm Cameron Dicker, the kicker from the Los Angeles Chargers, and I'm here with Timmy Tillman, current L.A.F.C. star player. So we know a little something about kicking balls. This week we'll tackle things like, who's winning the Premier League this year? What do you think is harder?

2:02Scoring a penalty kick or scoring a field goal? Join us each week for a quick chat with your soccer-loving bros about the best sport in the world. Soccer. Just don't tell my coaches I said that. Listen to Big Kick Energy on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, hey, I do part two at your club at the mentor Kelly Ben Simone, and I'm here with one of my favorite mentors from the Golden Bachelor at its Joan of Essos. Hi, it's been too long. They were going to chat a little bit about the sit down combo that Jaina had this week with Shayna Mokler, and it was a good one. If you haven't listened to that episode yet, pause right now, go listen to that episode,

3:03and then come back right here. Well, let's get started. I'm so excited to see you. And I'm going to see you in New York City on October. I think it's the six for the Page Six reality awards. Oh, really? I'm presenting the award to you guys. No. I'm going to be real up to the golden life. I love that. I did. Yeah, so we have to get together, and you have to tell me what you're wearing, because I have no idea what to wear to this thing. Oh, my God. We will definitely have a debrief, and you have to come over and we have drinks and do all sorts of fun stuff. I would love to. I'm coming the day before. Oh, my God. Okay, great. It's a date. It's a date. Okay, let's get, let's start talking. So the trailer just came out today. Did you see it yet? I did. I'm obsessed. I've watched it like four times, and I'm worried that some of the girls may have been mean to you. I mean, I just think it's so funny. I'm like, excuse me. I would have to come and beat them up. I'm kind of very polite, you know, but they don't like that. You are like the nicest. Okay, so you're the nicest person, but I also want to say you're like the nicest pretty

4:06person, because a lot of times really beautiful women aren't nice to other women. And you are always so incredibly kind. You like break that mold and you give me feet and like women and that they can be nice to each other. And I worry about you when you're amongst other women that I don't think maybe are as nice as you are. Oh, chill. We're so well. I mean, we're having a really good time. And I think you're going to be surprised by some of the things that happened and happens and happened, but you're I mean, you're going to love it. You're going to love it. Just just humor me for a second, because I'm really obsessed with the show. Give me three words that you would use to describe the golden life. Spirited. Okay. Adventurous. Yeah. Heart felt. I'm intrigued. I was intrigued already. Okay. I was already going to watch it. Now I'm really going to watch. So adventurous. Adventurous is like probably the the one that I like the most about that one. So I'm dying to see what kind of adventures they have.

5:09You guys on because I think maybe I get this age in our lives. I know I'm a little old. Yeah. But some of the people that you're on the show with are my age. Like we don't care as much about what people think about us. So maybe we're a little more adventurous than we were when we're younger. Which I love. Yeah. Perfect. Were you familiar with Shana Mochler or Travis Barker before you heard this episode? So I remember them from like long ago. So I mean, she's been in the news a ton and so is he. She's had like a lot of really kind of big relationship. She's been with a lot of men that are well known. She's had babies with them. So I remember her, but she had kind of faded from my radar a little bit. I don't think that there's been anything super recent. And now she's kind of back like back in the news a little bit. So it's fun. And you know what? I always loved her. Like she has quite a style and she's had quite a history and she's been on TV and she's been. She's bottled and she's kind of gotten around. So she's an interesting lady. I like to like that she's back in the news. How about you? Did you remember her? So yeah, I remember her, but I also remember her from the show.

6:10The book. And I was just reintroduced to her by Shana. And I just, we have so many questions. But my first thought out of the gate was just how knowledgeable she is about menopause. I know. I had no idea about this whole part of her life that she had this whole kind of interest in this medical background and supporting women and even supporting men in like a medical journey. And she seems so incredibly bright. And I love that when these beautiful women are also super smart and and poor, they're hard into something like that can help us. I think so too. And just, you know, her sharing her stories and Jenna sharing story, you know, that just the more information that we can get out there about, you know, the iterations of menopause. I mean, my mother had a personal know. My mother had really, really bad menopause and I was always so scared and she, as a result from bad menopause, she had severe migraines.

7:13And so my upbringing, oh my god, oh my god. I have one yesterday. Oh, sorry. And I just remember a young girl, you know, in my, not young girl, but as in my early teens, and I just could, would be like really, really, really excited and really jacked up. And then nothing. You couldn't talk to her for days or, you know, I'm like, Mommy, like, what's wrong with my mom? And you know, I had this perfect picture of her because she was, she was the perfect mom until these my, her menopause and her migraines really took over and just were debilitating. And just I don't think people get like how these hormones surging through our bodies and how much impact they have on us. So I had migraines starting when I went through puberty. I got my first migraine when I was 13 years old and I've had them ever since.

8:13And they certainly, whenever there was like a weird surge in hormones. So I have four kids when I was pregnant with my second daughter or my second child, my first daughter, I had terrible migraines through that entire pregnancy and had to actually quit my work. I couldn't work. I got them every day. So like these hormones that, that, you know, she is really investigating and spending a lot of time, you know, finding remedies for, you know, we used to just have to power through them. Like your mom had to power through it. I remember coming down into the kitchen when I was maybe in middle school and my mom would have her head in the freezer. So I'm like, Mom, what are you doing? She's like, I have a hot flash and she should have this, she'd be doing this with her bath row. And she'd have her head in the freezer or she'd be walking outside and bare feet in the middle of the winter, trying to cool down. I don't think people understand how severe these hormone related, like all the things that, yeah, they're awful. They're caused migraines and the hot flashes are horrible, sleeping is hard. I am so thrilled that there is a person that you can turn to and... Oh, hair loss, like just...

9:15Mm-hmm. That happened as well. Sorry, I don't know if to do. No, no, no, you were right. There are so many other things I wasn't even thinking about, but you're like the hair loss. Like how hard is it for a woman? Your hair is part of your identity. Yeah, but I mean, just the migraines, I'm so sorry that you go through that and that you have to go through that. Remember as a young girl, like just being like, what's wrong with my mom? Yeah. And not understanding and not knowing and even if she was like, oh, my period of whatever, I meant that didn't resonate. I had no idea. I was like, oh, okay. We don't know, and terrible cramps and all that. Right. Men have so much easier, they have no idea that things that we have to deal with like once a month. I'm so happy I'm done with the whole darn thing. No, I know. It's just like a lot easier. Oh, got them. But you know, I just was like, I just was very, very, very impressed by her knowledge. It's just just to your point. That was great. I was like, whoa, I was like, okay, this is a podcast. Let's get started. Yeah, we don't write into that. And I had no idea that she had this passion and you know, it was doing that.

10:16We should probably tell people the name of her website or the name of her organization. Oh, yeah. What's it called? Hello, Foxy. Etho XI, I believe. So it's with an eye at the end, because I did look it up the wrong way. And it provides so many services. And I mean, really, honestly, really, really good. And like, you know, good for her. She's branching out. I love that. I love that. Yeah. That was interesting. So what do you think about Shayna sharing that she and Travis did a nesting situation after the divorce with their kids? So so interesting. I've heard of that. Have you heard of that arrangement before people doing that? I have. I have a good West. We don't have nesting. You're divorced. She'll leave. And you can you move on. I've never known anybody who has done it. But I have heard of it before. And I thought what a wonderful thing to do for your kids if you can do it. Because how hard would it be? First of all, kids are having probably going through the worst thing in their lives. Their parents are separating. You know, they never imagined this was going to happen. You picture your life being perfect.

11:17You think you're always going to have both your parents and all of a sudden, they're not going to be together anymore. But they're allowing you to stay in your life. In your home with your kids, you know, your friends down the street walking to your same bus stop, you know, in your same bad at night. I think that's such, you know, during that really hard year or two, if you can, you know, keep this going and allowing them, you know, that the comforts of home, it's amazing. But can you imagine sharing a home with somebody that maybe you're not having an amicable divorce? But I mean, this is a pond. But if you saw my eyes right now, you would be like, whoa, I've had a lot of book talks, but I'm telling you my eyes are popping. I can see expression hardly any but a little bit. I went there. You can't see it in my neither. But yeah, I'm appalled too. I was like, I mean, I agree with you. I think it's beautiful. I just, I just don't understand. I mean, if you're going to get divorced, like there's, there's so many other things that are associated, I just couldn't see the person.

12:18I mean, and I love my kids more than anything. Right. For them, I just wouldn't be able to like have someone that I needed to separate from, like, permanently nesting in my house. I'd be like nest elsewhere. I do feel like it's a very unique situation, which is probably why we don't hear it very much. Shayna clearly had a really amicable divorce or separation with her ex and was able to maintain like a, because I mean, you're not doing the kids any good. If you're coming together and then fighting. But you got to imagine that maybe for some people has to do with money that it's too hard to maintain different residences or maybe they have to separate and sell the main home, so they can actually separate. So, you know, I think there's a lot of things that play into it. Money certainly is one of the things. But being, you know, having, you can't imagine you, you know, having that kind of situation with somebody that you are really actively still fighting with or arguing with or having

13:20you know, problems with the separation or the divorce or the agreement or, you know, how you're splitting the kids or the money or whatever. I could see any kind of turmoil will just be exasperated if you're coming to the house and they let the kitchen messy and do the laundry. I mean, that's a trigger for me. Yeah, me too. So, Jones, my husband, my assessment is French and we just put up a wall between the two apartments because he traveled so much the girls could see him when he came home, but, you know, he was not in the apartment. And it actually worked out really well for the kids because they didn't feel, you know, they were like, Daddy's home, they would go see him, have some blueberries and come home. That was, you had the perfect divorce situation. I think you may be the only person in the entire world. No, I actually, one other person whose father bought the house next door to them. And so, they used to go back and forth, but you have like the perfect divorce situation, but I can't imagine most people being able to afford that. Have two houses next door to each other. Yeah, I just was, I, you know, he just traveled and I understood the assignment.

14:26I knew that he needed to be in their lives, but I also knew that I needed to have control privacy and control. Yeah, I was going to say privacy, but control. Yeah, control. Even more. Yeah, probably above. And I can imagine that you didn't have to like have a really strict agreement about custody because they kind of lived with you. It sounds like and then visited him. Right. I just, I just said to him, I said, just love the girls and everything's fine. That's it. Spend as much time as you can. Yes. And I, there was, there was no expectations, so there was nothing to manage. Yeah. Perfect. Does that make sense? Do you mean like I was like, I've got the girls like my dad's like, okay, the girls are going in a ski trip. Let's go pack them up. So do they, are they still really close with their father? Yes, very. And does he still live in New York City or has he moved? He lives in New York and in Venice, but I think that reason that he is close to them and he's older is because there was, he didn't have any expectations. He didn't have, he just was like, you know, just go live your life and just, you know,

15:30be a good, be a good parent when you can. Yeah, good. I mean, be a good father. Don't parent my kids. I'll parent my kids. Did I say that loud? Nobody here. What happens on I do part two stays on I do part two. Exactly. Hey everyone, it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends Paul Rod, Michael Bubley, Seth Meyers, Nile Horan, Jake Shane, and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters like Alex National. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone. Okay, well control is a harsh word. I would say that's a harsh word. I am more outspoken. Growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet, I would speak for like the both of us. Now I'm working on like thinking of mom and really not thinking before I speak. And Joey King. You know if you're like mom is yelling at your sibling and even if you're annoyed with your sibling, you just like won't let that slide. It's like you only can yell at your sibling.

16:31I'm like, you can't do that here. That is not what I'm talking about. Like I just want to talk about it. Plus we've been taking your calls, listening to your voice mails and giving advice or at least trying to. So if you've got catching up to do now is the perfect time. Listen to Hey Jonas on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months. I survived and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are the survivor files. I just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up. Don't say anything. Every week I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up without a doubt he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming

17:31they are abducted, stalked, controlled and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. Their story is about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to the survivor files with Elizabeth Smart on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're a bookshelf and you're for you page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Pro's Society. The weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives and anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments nothing is off the table. Like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters and that is of Trojan

18:33horse, whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro's Society on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hi, this is highly breakman, Angel Jaretana. Here, Michael Hane, Patrick McDonald and we're the hosts of the Artisan Artisan Artisan Artisan Podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know, I think I sort of faux journaling. Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading. So you're so we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay. A panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No! I've been dying too. I'm so sorry, I'm seeing a reading of Sadako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audrement Donald at the Wonderland Bookstore. 14.

19:33That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark Thirty. No way. Patrick of the last bookstore though, Kim Ketrol is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone. I hear you get the elbows here, the eyelashes hate each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on the IHERD radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, I have to ask you about. I loved the conversation that the two of them had about both Jana and Shayna expressed regrets from their past relationships. And so Jana said, first of all, that even though she tried her hardest in her marriage, she wishes that she would have left sooner. And Shayna kind of said the same thing that she wishes she hadn't accepted this abusive

20:36treatment that she had in a previous relationship, not in her marriage, but in a previous relationship. Right. Do you have any regrets from a past relationship that you let it go on? For way too long? Or do you just think like every relationship we have is like part of the learning curve? And of course, I mean, I, you know, my ex-husband, we got divorced and then I met a guy that was younger than me, you know, 10 years younger. And there was just, you know, he was not the ideal human. And, you know, it was just not exactly, you know, how I wanted it to be. And so we would break up and then we'd get back together and we'd break up. And you know, at the time too, in my defense, I was working, I was, you know, editor of three magazines, like I was writing books, you know, I had two young girls and I just had so much on my plate that, you know, I kind of just let something, I kind of like let it go on and didn't take control of it.

21:37And that was my, that was my fault. And I should have been the bigger person and said, this is not working out. You know, we're not, we're never doing this again. But because I was so busy, I just kind of let things slide that shouldn't have. And so I am dised with her a lot. I mean, with Shane a lot, because things just happen, you know, just, you know, just life just happens. I know that sounds so cliche, but it just does. And, you know, it's so easy for us to say now, wow, you know, we should have done this, we should have done that. But when you're in the middle of it, you're not thinking like that. You're like, oh my God, my kids, my life, you know, I wasn't thinking about like relationship, I was just thinking about my kids and making money and just making sure that they had everything. So it's just, you know, we're in a different time now, you know, I mean, I feel like it's so much easier. I feel like for me, I would stay in relationships longer than I should have because I thought, is this as good as it gets?

22:40Like, like, even if I'm not 100% happy, maybe if I'm 75% happy, I mean, never find this much happy again. So I should just stay in this because it's good enough. It's not bad. I'm like, I was never in an abusive relationship, but I was also in a relationship that maybe wasn't like so love-filled or so like exciting or like I knew that there were red flags, maybe the way we resolve conflict or, you know, whatever it was, I stayed in too long because I just thought, maybe this is all there is and I'm not going to find anything better. I mean, that's just so honest and I just, I really, really respect you being open about that and I think that's something that's natural. I think that's something that happens all the time. Yeah. I think that women just kind of feel like there are so many single women that, you know, are trying to find love and, you know, myself included and, you know, when I meet someone, I just think to myself, oh my God, is he the, is he going to be the person? Mm-hmm. Literally, like, is this the person? Is this the person? I know.

23:40Instead of just allowing the relationship to, you know, unfold, evolve and unfold. I mean, who knows? Maybe I should go on the Golden Bachelor at. You should. Oh, boy, would they love to have you? I don't think, honestly, Kelly, there is not a guy good enough out there for you that we're going to have on the show. It's, they have a hard time finding men to be on the show, to be honest with you and I, the older men, younger men, they have a whole, a whole slew of them that want to be on the show because they see fame. Older men don't see fame. They see, oh, why am I going to do this to my life? Why am I going to embarrass myself? Why am I going to do this? Like, I can just sit at home and watch football with my buddies and I don't think they care as much about finding like their chapter two as we do. Right. I missed being a couple. I missed having my person. I missed having couple friends. I don't think guys care as much. They're just as happy having their guy friends going playing golf and watching football on the weekends where we're looking for like we like our couple relationships.

24:42We like other couples and I don't think guys care as much. Right. It's interesting because my last boyfriend, like we just, he had this amazing friend group and so we would spend so much time together and like his, the wives and the girlfriends, we all became so close and had so much fun. And as much as I, you know, kind of mourn that relationship, I really, really mourned the friendships. I was like, I was loving, I was like, oh my God, where are my girls? I've had that before or you love their kids or you love some other part of their life. And I loved his kids and I was happy we were having the best time. Like literally I was having so much fun. Okay. So I did listen to your podcast with Susan and Kathy, but I feel like maybe not everybody that's listening to this podcast, listen to that. So will you just tell the listeners a little bit about what happened there? Because I heard and it broke my heart, but I feel like you did the right thing. But can you like just maybe give us a quick synopsis? I mean, it's terrible because I had a breast cancer scare and you know, in his defense,

25:44he didn't really, I was, I didn't articulate. I didn't say I'm having a breast cancer scare. Something's really wrong with me. I need to take care of it. I said, oh, you know, just a little something because I, I had only known him for a couple of months. And you know, I just didn't feel like I could put that kind of responsibility on him. And then I knew I was going on the show. So I was like, first of all, I had this breast cancer scare and I was having, I was literally like, when you have a scare like that, Joan, you, you, the, the idea that I would not be able to, I'm not going to cry like literally. Yeah. The idea that I was not going to be there for my kids after I've done everything for my kids, put every single scent that I've earned into their brain so they're going to be the most, there can be the most amazing children in the world. Yeah. Now, that I wasn't going to be there. I just was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Now, like it really, really, really hit me. Terrifying. And it's not his responsibility. It isn't. I just really rubbed me the wrong way. And then when I knew I was going on the show, I just was like, I can't go on a television

26:48show with someone that I, that is not going to be a forever person. Yeah. That sign and actually that was the most mature thing that I've done in a really long time. And it would have really changed your interactions with the women on the show because I think everybody else on the show is saying, all right? Right. Except for LeWan. It would have been right. Exactly. Yeah. So I think it would have changed your interaction. So like in the long run for like the health of the shower, for the health of you and you maintaining, you know, your normal persona, like I feel like you probably did the right thing. But I love that you just said it wasn't his responsibility. And I think as women, we don't want to be dependent. Like we don't want to seem like dependents. We want to seem really independent. And like I'm going to, I can take care of my own. And I don't need you to help me. And but you are really vulnerable and we don't feel comfortable being vulnerable. That's right. Right. Right. You know, again, like I know I always say this, but I am from the Midwest. And we're just like, we just are take care of things kind of personalities. Yeah. And in New York, it's like, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, and

27:49me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, and it's just like, I'm just not raised like that. And so, and he's, and I'm not talking to saying that he is, but most of my friends are like, oh my god, you didn't, and I was like, first of all, like, I don't even understand what you're saying. You're speaking so quickly. And I, I'm like freaking out inside. So can you turn down the volume on your concern? And please just let me try to get through this. That be a text, please. It's just a different way of, you know, honestly, it's just, it's just a different upbringing. And so, I mean, you know, I, I really, he's such a great guy. And he is, I mean, whoever gets to go out with him is like so lucky because he's such a stellar human. I really, really, really believe that. Do you think there's ever going to be a chapter two for you guys? You know, I don't, I don't know. I mean, I really don't know. I need to get through the show and kind of just see where I am when the show, after the show finishes. And, you know, I just, it's funny that you said that because like today, I was on my, on

28:51my run. I was like, you know, I just want to give myself some grace, Joan, you know, I've just been through so much. The show is really exciting, but it's also very, very difficult. And I just want to give myself a little grace. And I think when I'm in that mode, the person will be around for me at that time. Do you know what I mean? I don't want to meet someone right now. Like I'm like, I'm filming the volume to the work, you know, I have to fight with some real housewives. I've got a right to have a real argument to have on camera. I've got to go. I'm going to give it right now. Derrida hates me right now. And so, you know, I just want to just give myself some grace and we'll, you know, see what happens after the after the show. So much about relationships are about finding the right person at the right time. I mean, I think we've all found the right person at the wrong time and we've all found the wrong person at the right time, like getting the timing perfectly with the right person is really, really hard. He was just like the right person at the wrong time.

29:51Yeah. Yeah, he just was the wrong time. Um, so you never, you never, you never know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just, I'm just trying to like stay like in my, oh, my personal, like personal, personal self bubble. Yeah. I'm just trying to say, like true to myself and you never know. Your sanity. Yeah. Well, I'm so glad that your breast cancer scares over. Thank you. Thank you. I wish you had let me know I would have flown there and like snuggled down with pink fuzzy slippers with you and gotten you through that. Well, I was in LA with you. I had to go on steroids because I was like such a mess to come to LA. When you were in LA. And I wanted to go to LA. I was like, I'm not going to, I'm not going to not live. Yeah. Wow. I would. Yeah. I mean, I know scary. I know those things too. You know, what are you gonna do? Be like, hey, Joan. I had something like, well, I just, I had a thyroid cancer scared. So I was coming off, so I was going on to gold.

30:52I was going to be golden about to rep. And I had like a physical, they make you tap a physical, which they should. So I had a physical and hemorrhageron and my thyroid hormone was really off, like really off. So my doctor said, well, you would have time to like, do scans and do all the tests we need to do, you know, it'll be fine. Take care of it when you get back. So now I am worried the entire, so of course I Google it immediately and it says, if you're the numbers above like eight, and I was like 12.5, you likely have thyroid cancer. And I was like, oh my God, so I'm like, brewing in my head the entire time I'm filming golden voucher, I had this in my mind that I have thyroid cancer. And so I get home and I have to do press really soon after that. So there's only like a month turn around between you finish filming and the show comes out. So and when the show comes out, the week the show comes out, you do all of your press in New York City. So I go and get a sonogram of my thyroid and they do another blood test.

31:53And I'm waiting for the results. And I'm thinking, okay, well, so I gotta figure out how I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna probably have to have surgery and then I have to remove my thyroid. And I've read all about it and it's, you know, somewhat curable and like I could be okay. But I'm just like going through this whole thing and but I'm like, I don't want this to be my story. I don't want cancer to be my story. Coming off the golden batch of it, that's all they'll talk about if that's what happened. So I'm gonna keep it a secret and I'm gonna wear all high dresses. So I have this whole idea of how I'm gonna get through like the next four months without anybody knowing that I thyroid cancer. Well, it comes out that I just have nodules on my thyroid and I just have to have them checked every year and they're fine and they could turn into something but very likely won't. So but it was like, I was scared like three months. I was just, I was sick to my stomach. Every time I thought about it, I had like a panic attack. I mean, of course, but I love that you're so like organized trying to figure out what the turtle neck. I'm like, I'm gonna wear high neck dresses like sleeveless. They're gonna be really pretty but I'm gonna have this big scar here that my pride. Right. Yeah. It was all about the dresses. I know. Oh my god. I mean, that's just stressful too when you're filming

32:54and you're like looking for love and trying to be vulnerable and be open and just trying to keep pushing that back, pushing that back. Oh my god. I didn't tell a soul. It's no one. Oh my god. So I haven't really answered your question. How have you gone about introducing men to your children while you were dating? Hey everyone, it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rudd, Michael Bubley, Seth Meyers, Nile Horan, Jake Shane and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters, like Alex and Ashton Earl. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone to go. OK, well control is a harsh word. I would say that's a harsh word. I am more outspoken. Growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet, I would speak for like the both of us. Now I'm working on like thinking a mom is really and I'm not thinking before I speak. And Joey King. You know if your like mom is yelling at your sibling and even if you're annoyed with your sibling,

33:55you just like won't let that slide. It's like you only can yell at your sibling. I'm like, you can't do that here. That is not what I want from her like that. I just want to talk about her. Plus we've been taking your calls, listening to your voice mails and giving advice or at least trying to. So if you've got catching up to do now is the perfect time. Listen to Hey Jonas on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months. I survived and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are the survivor files. You just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up, don't say anything. Every week I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up without a doubt he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed

34:56and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. Their stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to the survivor files with Elizabeth Smart on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're a bookshelf and you're for you page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Pros Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives and anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm gonna have to look up this story. I'm obsessed, I'm obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table. So like if you can hide some real messages

35:57inside compelling characters and that is of Trojan horse, whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pros Society on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hi, this is Kylie Breikman, Angel Jaretana. Jeremy Colhane, Pesh McDonald. And we're the hosts of the artists on artists on artists on artists podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is foe journal. I don't know, I think I sort of foe journaling. Yeah, it's reading, it's called reading. So you're, so we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay, a panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No! I've been dying too. I'm so sorry, I'm seeing a reading of Sadako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audrement Donald

36:58at the Wonderland Bookstore, 14. That's crazy, I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark 30. No way! We'll have to come to the last bookstore though. Kim Kertroll is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone. I hear you'll get the elbows here, the eyelashes hate each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the IHR radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So I think it's a little easier. My, I was married for 32 years. I was at the genre 36 and my kids were grown. Right. John passed away. So my youngest was 25. My oldest was 31, so I have four kids. So between 25 and 31.

38:00So I'm like introducing them. It wasn't like I was saying like here is potentially a new person in your life that you're gonna have to live with or that's gonna act like a father to you or gonna be like some, like in some capacity, like affecting their lives that much. They were all moved out of my home and they all had lives of their own. Some of them, one of my, two of my kids had kids of their own already. So really after John died, my kids were all kind of grown. And by the time chalk came into their life, they were even out of my house. So I don't think it was super hard for me. And they wanted me to find somebody. They were really open to me find somebody. I would, I introduced them only to like two men. And I'd be like, oh, like Frank's gonna come over and watch the football game with us. And so that was okay. It was more uncomfortable for me to introduce men to my mother-in-law. I'm still very, very close to my mother-in-law. I see her several times a week. She lives very close to me. She babysits one of my grandkids twice a week. She, I'm very, very, very close to my mother-in-law.

39:00And that was actually more comfortable for me to introduce her to somebody. And she was always, couldn't have been any nicer. You're very welcoming, but that was hard for me. How about you? You know, so when my, you know, my kids were very, very young when I got divorced. They were five and seven. And so again, like my ex has been lived next door with the wall between us. So the great wall of China, the great wall of New York. And because, you know, I was working in magazines and I was, I didn't have to always be in the office. I just went to the office for certain things. But most of the things I was doing was writing and people would come and meet me. The photographers would come and meet me. The styles would come and meet me. Exciting on kids. And so there was always people around, always. And if I, you know, if I, if there was someone that I was going to date with and they would see them, they'd be like, hi, you know, whatever. They wouldn't even flinch. They never even, they never even like, who are you dating? Who's that person? Like, it could have been a, a, a, a colleague.

40:01They didn't know. They didn't differentiate between the people coming in. Right. So that was easy. Okay, what was it? It was a lot easier for me. And, you know, I mean, there was, you know, there weren't that many guys that I would bring into my family home clearly. How about when they were teenagers, I'm guessing at that point, they may have noticed things a little different, like the way you acted to people in your home. But still, they didn't, I never said anything. And there was just so many people. I mean, I'm talking like a lot of people and a lot of gay men were always around me. And so they just never, they just didn't, you know, unless there was like a special friend, I would say, like this is a special friend. That's my therapist told me to do. So, you know, that's what I would say. And they'd be like, what is a special friend? And I was like, oh, okay, I'm not gonna do details. I'm like, I'm like, I'm not gonna do details. What does that mean? That's right. So, but I think it's, I think it's all, it's very subjective, you know, it's like, like you were saying, like, your kids were okay, but your mother-in-law, which I love so much that you guys are so close, that's so beautiful. But I think that, you know, if you're like, you know, if you're living in a house

41:02and you're living in like Illinois, where I'm from, and you know, a guy comes over, it's obvious. When you're living in New York City and you work from home, and all these people are coming into your house, it's not as obvious. So, you and I got ahead of easy, really. We did have that awkward. This is, you know, and Banda is special to me in my life now. And like, you're gonna have to like him, or I hope you're gonna like him. And by the way, I mean, this is an awful thing to say, but even the guys that I did date, like even if they were the best guys in the world, I was solely to focus on making money for my kids, that even if they were like unbelievably fantastic, my focus was my breaking money for my children, and they were the second, and they knew it. Well, you know what, I'm not sure if that ever changes. It's hard for a man, it's hard. It's hard for a man to be completely honest about that. I'm not sure my focus, a man will ever come before my kids, no matter what. I, and my kids are grown, like my, my oldest is 36, and my youngest is 30, and my kids will always be number one,

42:05because you know what, you only get one mom. I could probably have a million men, or maybe not, maybe I'll never have another man again, whatever, but my kids only ever have me as their mother, and I will, they, that will always be my number one position in life as their mother. And I love that, and I think that's like a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful sentiment, and I feel the same way. You think we will find men that, we'll think that's okay, like accept that position. I think it has to be a very, very healthy man. Yep. Who has a lot of respect for, I mean, that's, that's why, you know, it's like, I have all these, you know, I have all these like parameters for these guys. They have to be like a very healthy human, not like physically. I'm talking mentally healthy human, right? Because I could not be with a man who doesn't have respect for his ex-wife. If you talk badly about your ex-wife, or don't, or are disrespectful to them, in any way possible, like that's just not my vibe. Like I know, people think it's fun, I saw my thing. It's like, you have to figure it out.

43:05And if you can't figure it out, you know, then that's something that you need to, you know, I think that's the therapist before you, we get to get back together. I feel like it's a whole, well, I feel like it's a whole element about being a gentleman. Like my, I was raised, my father was the ultimate gentleman. He never, he never, cussed, he never spoke poorly about really anybody. He just was a kind human. He immigrated here from Holland, he was just a gentleman. And I, like my, so my bar is very high for men. When it comes to talking ill about people, like talking about ex-wives, or talking about previous relationships, I just feel like a gentleman does that. And so like that's a problem for me. That's a red flag for me. Dr. is not talking about his wife poorly. I know instances, I know why they're divorced, but I know very few stories, I know very little. He says, you know, he's the mother of my kids, and they have a healthy relationship.

44:05And now he's really good about not talking about his ex-wife. I love that. I love that, because that makes you think, you know, I think that, I think the bottom line to that is that, like what makes a woman feel safe? And when you're constantly talking ill about your ex, it doesn't make you feel safe. It really doesn't, because if he talks poorly about an ex, then he'll talk poorly about you to the next woman. If there's an ex-wife. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. Are there instances you wish you could have done different when it came to dating as a single parent? Do you wish you'd spent more time you'd given more to a guy or given less to a guy and or skipped the whole thing? You know, and like, I just, you know, I just kind of said, I nodded to that about, you know, I just was working so much. And, you know, I mean, I was working, my impetus was pure. Yeah, like I was working because I was educating brains.

45:08I was not working because I wanted to do Chanel bag. No. No, I wasn't, no, I wanted to do Chanel bag. Just kidding. No, but I'm just being facetious. But I mean, back then, like I wasn't working because I was feeling gorgeous and I was like, wow, I'm gonna work and I'm gonna be this worker. Like I was working because I was making money and I had a motive and I knew what the end game was and I knew how much money I needed to make every single semester and I made it happen. Do you think that you maybe wasted some of your really good years? So like this age, it's very hard to find a single man that we want. Do you, but back then, like when we were younger and I was still married, so when you were younger, do you think that you wasted some years where there were maybe way more eligible men? Yes, I mean, I really wanted to have more kids. Like, I mean, I thought I would have had like four or five kids. Like I always wanted kids. My ex-husband was older and I, you know,

46:09I just, he just, you know, he loves my girls, but he didn't want to have all these, you know, he didn't want to have a lot of kids. Yeah. And I really, really wanted that. I think that when I was single, I, you know, was a big model. I was an editor. So I was like the bright and shiny toy for the single guys in New York and instead of seeing me as a someone that they wanted to make sure that I was safe, they wanted to take me out to dinner and they were like, oh my God, look what I'm going out with. I was like, oh yeah. He's like, you, I'm like, wow. Great for you. I bet they did love me with you. And, you know, that was nice for them, but I always, I honestly would leave dates and I just felt like very, like disappointed is not the right word. I was just like, why did I waste my time? I came at home, like, you know, drinking tea, reading books, hang out with my kids, watching stupid movies. Yeah. You know, screaming at them about homework, I could have been doing the things that I love to do. Yeah, because you were working all day. So you were probably tired by the end of the day

47:11and then to make an effort to go with a guy and it not be great was probably like, why did I waste my time? Right. Yeah, I could have used it. I used to think to myself, why did I just waste my time? Yeah. So I love Sheena's story when she talked about reconnecting with the guy, I'm trying to remember his name, that she was having love with before. And the kind of reconnect with him throughout her dating career. Greg. Yes, Greg. Thank you, thank you. And they finally, it sounds like maybe reconnected at the right person at the right time. Would you ever go back and visit maybe an old, old love? I know we talked about your most recent old love and maybe there's potential, but there's, is there somebody lurking in the back of your brain that you dated or you would have liked to have dated that is still lurking there and you'd like to maybe reconnect with? I mean, there was one guy that I really, really liked that my kids really liked, but he had just gotten out of a marriage and he wasn't ready and he was, he had a, you know, didn't, his marriage didn't felt very well for him,

48:12but he was a great, great guy and I really, really liked him. But again, I'm also kind of, you know, it's like, I know when, if they're not, if they're just having a good time, I'm just like, no, no, this is not the vibe. No, no, no, no, no. Have you ever thought about like trying to find him or do you still know where he is? I know where he is. Like, he'll DM me all the time. He's like, Keeks, my nickname is Keekie. So he's like, Keek, look at Gray. Look at him, I'm like, oh my god, stop. Okay, so do you think he's a playboy? I mean, I don't think he's a playboy. I just think that he went through a lot and I think that it's a, it's a testament to him to like where he is in his life because he's still not married and he's still never had kids and he loved kids and he's a very bright guy, very successful guy. And never had kids. It sounds like that, well, for a guy that ship hasn't sailed. They can have them when they're much older, but I, I, I wanted more kids. Yeah, and so you guys would have been perfect together. Right, exactly. Yeah. Okay. And I mean, the store with the, when she, when Shayna talks about meeting Greg

49:14and it's just like, I mean, she's, her voice, the tone in her voice, I was like, oh my god, she's done. She found him. She's like, there you are. Done. Yeah. You're like, you're like, you're the way she said, she literally pointed and said, you're the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. But you know, she kept, he kept playing in her story. He never left her book. He, he had chapters throughout her whole story and she, it just finally hit the right person at the right time. And that's right. And that is key. That is key. Hey, everyone. It's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends, Paul Rod, Michael Buble, Seth Meyers, Nile Horan, Jake Shane, and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters, like Alex Nasson Earl. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone to go. OK, well, control is a harsh word. I would say that's a harsh word. I am more outspoken, growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet. I would speak for like the both of us. Now I'm working on like, thinking of mom and just feeling it and taking before I speak.

50:17And Joey King. You know, if you're like, mom is yelling at your sibling. And even if you're annoyed with your sibling, you just won't let that slide. It's like, you only can yell at your sibling. I'm like, you can't do that here. That is not what I want talk about her like that. I just want to talk about her like that. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voice mails and giving advice, or at least trying to. So if you've got catching up to do, now's the perfect time. Listen to Hey Jonas on the I Heart Radio App, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months. I survived and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are the survivor files. I just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up without a doubt,

51:18he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled, and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. Their stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to the survivor files with the Elizabeth Smart on the I Heart Radio App, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're a bookshelf and you're a for-you page or equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Pro's Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks pride and prejudice and love island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week, we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm gonna have to look up this story. I'm obsessed, so obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments,

52:20nothing is off the table. So like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters and that is a Trojan horse, whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro's Society on the I Heart Radio App, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman, Angel Jaretana. Jeremy Colhane, Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the artists on artists on artists on artists podcast. The improvised character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is foe journal. I don't know, I think you guys are to foe journaling. Yeah, it's reading, it's called reading. So you're, so we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay. I'm the title of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No! I've been dying too.

53:21I'm so sorry, I'm seeing a reading of Sadako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audrement Donald at the Wonderland Bookstore, 14. That's crazy, I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Doctor 30. No way. Patrick of the last bookstore though, Kim Ketrol is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone. You can, I hear you get the elbows here, the eyelashes hate each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the IHIRD Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And then when she said, oh my God, I would marry him. I'm dying to marry him. I know, she said I'm dying to marry him. I love that. I love that. I'm like, what would I like?

54:21What do you want? I don't know of how much I like him. And she's like, I just want to marry him. I just want to marry him. I feel like we're going to hear an engagement room or two. I just thought that was so honest. I really liked your honesty. I really liked her. I was just like, oh my God. No, and I didn't expect to at all. Maybe they're I loved her. I know. I know. No, I was very. I was like, I was like, I'm surprised. I was like, well, because Jane is so sweet and soft and just very thoughtful. So I was like, maybe it's just because Jane, you know, Jenna is so sweet like that that she's bring this out in her. And I was like, no, no, no, this woman is like, she knows what's going on. She's very clued into her life and how she's navigated her world. I have said some stuff in the past. I have to admit that I was that of how like, you know, she is with Travis's new wife and their kids. So I have said something. No, but I take it all back because I just was so moved by her today. I just I did. I just thought she was she's really, really beautiful human.

55:22I loved how she owned all of her mistakes in like the past and and like kind of shown how she's grown. And I think she's like, and sounds like she's super close to her kids. And like now she found another love. I just feel like maybe she finally found the right one. And sometimes it takes people five tries or however many tries. And right. And then they find it. She might be when she was talking about her daughter and how she has to go back and forth and LA detects this because of the emergence because she was the emergency room. That's concerned. I mean, that literally broke my heart. Yeah, I listened to that. She spoke about it very matter of faculty. And I'm sure it's way more emotional than she let on because when your child is suffering, particularly mentally, honestly, I almost feel like that's even harder. I've had kids that have suffered. And you know, especially after my husband died, like all we all suffered. It was all really, really hard. And you know, like it's hard to like so if they have a broken arm or if they have a concussion or if they have something

56:23wrong with their eyes, you go and you seek medical attention and they fix it. Mental illness is so much harder. And it sounds like her daughter is really, really like she's 20 years old. Sounds like it's just super hard to deal with that. And it sounds like she's probably in college. All of that is hard. I don't know. Yeah, that would scare me. Yeah, I totally agree. And that's exactly what I thought. I was just like, that's something that you can't, like, you can't put a bandaid on. No, do you know what I mean? Like you can't come and say like, we're going to go to the doctor. We're going to get that taken care of. This is long term. Mm-hmm. I think so while to heal, like from mental illness, from things like that. Yeah. And 21 is a really vulnerable age and hard just to be a 21-year-old girl anyway with all the social pressures that we have. I mean, I remember being 21. I mean, it was like maybe some of the best times in my life. And probably some of the hardest. But also, she has on top of all of that. She has her famous parents. Yeah. Very famous parents.

57:24Yeah. And you wonder how that all plays out that are in the news and have had some, you know, had a past. And so that, you know, their past follows you also. People know about you. And you know, they even had to talk about. She mentioned that she connected with Travis and said, do our kids have security in New York? Like, oh, kids are in New York? Do they have security? I'm like, wow, your kids have to have security? That's kind of scary. I thought so too. I was like, security. Huh? I was, I honestly, I was like, wait a minute, security. I was like, security. Oh, they're Kardashians. But her kids with Travis are not Kardashians. And she was talking about her kids having security. Oh, but her kids, they travel with them. Travel with them also. Yeah. Yeah. So when they're together in New York or wherever around Courtney, you have to have that. Yeah. And they have that with them. OK, that makes more sense. I was like, wow, I mean, he was famous. I mean, obviously, but like really famous. But like, I mean, yeah, but I mean, I

58:25wouldn't think that he would need security. I wouldn't either. I wouldn't think, I wouldn't think most people that pass him on the street aren't going to know who he is. I agree. I was like, wait, wait. Yeah, I was like, what is talking about? I didn't understand that. Yeah. So where are kids do deal with that too? So that they are really in the limelight with the Kardashians? Yes. I mean, that is a terrible, terrible, terrible life. They didn't ask for that. Especially since, yeah, especially since like, they got thrust into this as kind of like adults. But remember, like, you know, Kim, she was held at gunpoint. Oh, I know. When she was in Paris, when she was around, yes. Geary. You know, I totally get how the Kardashians need security. I didn't realize I now I get the whole security connection. The musicians' children, right? Totally get that. Yeah, I would be scared for my kids. And that must be like hard on her, knowing that her kids are in that kind of situation. Like she had to ask today's security in New York. Like, you have to worry about your kids at that level, that they're security. Yeah. That's scary. It's really scary.

59:26Yeah, that they were dragged into that now, life also. It's like almost being a royal. Right. It is exactly, yes. Like you have to worry about kidnapping. That's a horror story. Yeah. That's a horror story that we should probably do a podcast on. Oh, this is good, because I think you have comments about this. It sounded like Shayna and Travis wife Courtney Kardashian are not very close. Kelly, how have you handled that dynamic when your ex-husband has had a new woman in his life? Was it difficult for you? OK, you're never going to believe it. Sorry. But before we got divorced, I separated, I introduced Jill to one of my friends, who's a beautiful, beautiful human. And I was just like, here you go. I was like, I knew the most. I give to you. So I introduced them, and she is unbelievable. And they would gather for a very long time. I love that. Did you ever ask him to return the favor? No. No. You didn't think you could do it.

1:00:27I just couldn't. He's been, he's dated a million, a million, a million models. And I just couldn't have that around my kids. So you did it for your kids. You wanted him to have the right person. I did. And you did a great job. She's, if I can't tell you her name, but she is a fantastic, fantastic human. I love that. So they're not together anymore, but they did spend a lot of time together. Yeah. I mean, they were together for over seven years. I mean, a long time. So it was a really nice relationship. I'm very proud of them, actually, Jill. You did a good job, and I'm proud that you did that. Like that took a lot of kind of self-confidence, because like handing off the person that you once loved is even probably hard, even if you don't love them anymore. Like they're still part of you, and part of your story, and to give them another story. Like, start the next chapter, help them start. It was really great of you. I just was like, my father was just like, we need to tie a bow in this. We're done.

1:01:27Yeah. So let me ask you, does he, is he married now, or does he have a new relationship? He does. He has a great relationship, and she's really, really smart, and been very, very, very kind to my ex, and he's very happy. And she's very, very gracious to my kids. And that means so much. Have your kids liked all of his relationships since your divorce, or? You know, I have to say, like, you know, he's, you know, he went back to a couple of younger models, which is, you know, it's fine. That's like, you know, that's his vibe, which is fine. But then he also dated one of his girlfriends was, is my client, and I love her. And she's a fantastic Venezuelan, brilliant, brilliant woman. And then his current girlfriend is just a very, very smart English woman, and she's lovely. So, you know what I mean? Like, I just feel like, okay, yeah. And the girls are great. I mean, by the way, even if they weren't, my girls would be like, nice to see you. Because you raise nice girls.

1:02:27Because I'm like, you don't say anything bad about anyone. Like, even in, even in Jess, like, it doesn't, it's just a disservice to you. Well, you've sent a great example that you don't need to put other people down to make yourself look good. That's not right. No, no. You do a good example for your daughters. Can you tell my co-stars that? I really feel like I need to come on in. I'm going to talk with them. I don't think they know how nice you are. I don't know how they could have missed that. I'll do a guest of show, and I'm just here to tell you all people I'd like to make an announcement. Public announcement. Oh my gosh. From Joe. Obviously, I don't know the Kelly I know. Give her a chance. Yeah. Well, I mean, they got to make TV. I had to percent. No, it's all good. It's all good. That's where you guys are getting that award. Getting the award. It's going to be so fun. But you know, it's like, I mean, I appreciate you complimenting me on that. And that, you know, it took a lot. It took a lot out of me.

1:03:27Do you know what I mean? I just was, but I knew what I had to do. I knew that I had to not be with them anymore. I knew I had to start my own life. I knew I had to really, really be laser focused on work. And I knew I had to go for it because I was 36 years old. And it was like the window was if I was going to meet someone, it was then. And because I had to work so much, you just put that on the back runner. I didn't see people, Stone. I didn't even like, I didn't. I would be like, and I mean, you can ask any guy that, if I gave you their number and you're like, so what do they have? Kelly, they'd be like, oh, she was so great. She just was having a good time. Like, yeah, they would never say she was serious. They would never say, oh, she wanted to get married. Or they would never say, like, you know, she wouldn't have more kids. Or I just, I just didn't give off that energy. And you know, guys really pick up on that. I mean, and I don't think that you could have, I don't think there's enough room in your life. When you talk about how much you were working

1:04:28and how much time you wanted to spend with your kids, there just wasn't enough time for a man. I mean, like, where would he fit into that? Right. You wouldn't have. Right. And you did, you did it your way. And I think a lot of women do it our way. And that's why maybe there are so many single women out there and not that many single men. OK, Kelly, I have had the best time talking. I think we could stay on this podcast for like four hours, but they're making it like it now. So are you ready to find love again in your chapter two? We're here to help send us an email or leave us a voice mail. All the info is in the show notes. Follow us on socials too. I do part two. And I heart radio podcast for Falling in Love is the main objective. In February of 2024, celebrated, a illustrator and children's book author, Patre Mathers and her husband, Michael, mailed letters to dozens of friends and family members to let them know they had died by suicide. Dear honey's, this is goodbye. By the time you get to shredder, both Petra and I will be dead. Next stop, Wonderland. Why did they do it? And what did it do to the people they left behind?

1:05:30Listen to death of an artist on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What up, this is Jay Valentine. Co-host of the R&B Money Podcast alongside my brother, R&B legend, tank. Together, we've built a space for artists, executives, and fans of R&B music to reminisce and tell the real stories behind the music. I have no money. I was hood famous. They think you're going to get everybody out. We lived in a project. And real love came out. They hear the music and we had nothing. From Smokey Robinson to Mary J. Blige, V2K to Jill Scott. If you're a super dedicated R&B fan, this is where you belong. Listen to R&B money from the Black Effect podcast network on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This season on my podcast, Here's the Thing. I talk to actor, Stephen Root. I'm a people watcher. You see that guy going down the drain, though? Yeah, I can use that. And open igloo co-founder, Alia Muhammad. I love staying on top of what is going on in our city, what is on renters minds. And taking all of that knowledge to build a platform

1:06:32that hopefully is going to make New York City better in the long run. Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The World Cup is over. But if you caught the soccer bug and aren't sure what to do now, check out our podcast, Big Kick Energy. I'm Cameron Dicker, the kicker from the Los Angeles Chargers. And I'm here with Timmy Tillman, current L.A.F.C. star player. So we know a little something about kicking balls. Each week we'll tackle things like, who's winning the Premier League this year? What do you think is harder? Scoring a penalty kick or scoring a field goal? Join us each week for a quick chat with your soccer loving bros about the best sport in the world. Soccer, just don't tell my coaches I said that. Listen to Big Kick Energy on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.