The People Pleasing Trap (And How To Escape It)

In our last episode, we met Wendy, a professional drained by constant giving with little in return. Alongside guest Sharon Weinstein, we explored the “disease to please” and its impact on well-being. In this solo episode, Jay opens up about his own journey as a recovering people pleaser, offering a clear 4-step framework for breaking free from self-sacrifice and approval-seeking. With real talk and grounded strategies, he challenges the hidden motivations behind people pleasing and provides empowering ways to meet your needs without guilt. Jay shares how to spot people-pleasing patterns in real time, uncover the emotional gaps that drive this behavior, and shift from outsourcing your needs to meeting them within. He also explains how you can still support others, just not at the expense of your own well-being. If you’ve ever felt torn between being liked and being true to yourself, this episode will help you set boundaries, build confidence, and reconnect with your worth. Notable Quotes “You’re reaching for the approval of others to fill a hole that’s within you.” — Jay Abbasi “Still be of service. Help them in any way you can. Just do so without sacrificing yourself in the process.” — Jay Abbasi Resources and Links Jay Abbasi Website: https://jayabbasi.me/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayabbasi/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jayabbasi_/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thejayabbasi/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@jayabbasipodcast Join Us Next Time In Monday’s episode, Jay introduces Daniela, the Director of HR and Risk Management for the City of Orlando. As turnover rises and engagement drops, Daniela is doing everything she can to shift culture with limited resources. Jay will be joined by global keynote speaker Sherene McHenry to unpack what it takes to help exhausted leaders reignite their teams and lead cultural change in tough environments. Don’t miss this powerful conversation on leadership, motivation, and sustainable transformation.