South Beach Sessions - Lamar Odom

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1:00Savings of up to $1 per gallon redeemable with $20 rewards dollars in your loyalty account, a participating locations, terms, and conditions apply. Hello and welcome to South Beach Sessions. I'm very excited about this. I've been wanting to do this for a very long time here. Lamar Odom, when he was in Miami, was a lot of different things, fun at basketball, obviously, but vulnerable, willing to talk about himself in ways that are open. He's an open book, two-time champion, six-man extraordinaire. It's nice to see you, Lamar. What's up, man? How are you doing? You're getting a call already. Yeah, I can. I'm really good. I'm in good place. Healthy. Feeling good. How are you spiritually? Amazing to great, faithful, all the time to the Lord. Just being my best self every day.

2:01I'm trying to get some business done. How would you tell people what your Miami experience was? Because what I remember from your Miami experiences that everybody fell in love with that 42 and 40 team, and that they were very upset to see you go even though you were being traded for Shaquille O'Neil. Yeah, yeah, that's a big deal, right? I think as far as basketball is concerned, it was probably life-changing. As far as the beginning of a basketball journey, what wasn't the beginning of my basketball journey, but I guess the stage or phase, it was life-changing for me. What was the culture shock like for you going from the Clippers organization to something as regimented? Something disciplined? Yeah, I mean, I owe a lot to Pat Rally for having that faith in me. We caught me in the Wayne, caught my Miami Heat when they got tired of getting to ask

3:08kick, because they worked so hard. I could just remember my first month down there. I thought my name was motherfucker. Really, it was serious. It taught me that you can learn, especially when you're willing to, and change bad habits. Well, when we sat down here, you were saying you missed the discipline. Yeah, I missed it now. You know, for me, my life journey, I try to just be my best self every day, so I can do a lot of things. Physically, probably a walk in America. I'm a walk in America. I don't know if you can ever go meet somebody to survive physically, but also mentally.

4:10It'd be hard for a lot of people to show face after being what I've been through. But hopefully, my story helps people get out of that dark place, that dark place of addiction. Or you can overcome it, even when you count it out. I'm like, I was my family more than one time, but I told them, you're finding good vibes to the more. But I'm here talking to you. When I woke up, the doctors told me I probably went, when you walk or talk again, after 12 strokes and sick heart attacks. I think the reason why I was scared, because probably my faith in God, and I don't think

5:10someone with as faith is strongest, my heart was going to be taken, especially after the night that I didn't even do drugs that night. I was depressed. If I had cocaine on me that night, I definitely would have taken it. I found out something divorce paper from Chloe. I guess my honest to God true, but I think the reason why God saved me, I don't know. I'm still really finding out. But as I start to find out more and more, I live clean and meet people and meet people who can change my life every day. I guess living life the best way I think is my reward. 12 strokes and six heart attacks is a crazy thing to come out of your mouth.

6:12That's the truth. I know. I know that untold you told the story very well. You gave them the most open version of yourself. What do you remember from 12 strokes and six heart attacks? Is there any memory? It was all black. I remember when I woke up, it was a... I woke up. I still got this mark on my neck from tearing the tube and she'd out of my neck and my mouth. They say when you wake up from a situation like that, you're in shock. But I don't remember much. What do you remember about before that, the moments of any... It just never went to the brothel sitting down and having a drink and didn't wake up three days later. And for like for attic or somebody I liked to party, I was like, that must have been some good shit to knock me out for three days. And when I woke up, I'd say the scariest part was not being able to talk.

7:15You know what I mean? Like me, you can sit here and thoughts come to my mind and words come out of my mouth when we think. I would say that probably was the most scariest part. How long before you were able to talk? Shit, I forgot. Man, it's been so long and so much going on. In my life since then, I've maybe like three or four months to walk and talk again. I started to walk and talk so fast. I didn't really finish my cognitive therapy. So far, it's like, you know, that's why I'm just like reading a book. It's like, it's a chin workout for me. How were you changed by it? Of course I really like, I care more about myself. I care more about my health and what my health means to my family and people I really love. Is there a way for you to articulate?

8:16Because I want to talk about the entirety of your life. But if you were trying to explain your first 12 years, 14 years to people, what are the signposts and the landmarks that you would talk about as the things that shaped you from there? Oh, that's easy. Probably my mother passing away. I lost her 12, right? Yeah, when I was 12. I had to shake me and frame me athletically and academically. I would really increase my faith in God. And I think at that time it grew me closer to my family. I went to God.

9:17Give me purpose. Those are positive things to come from that. Yeah. I would think that the things associated with my life is how I always think. My glass, I was raised. She was positive, right? Yeah. I was raised to think. My glass is always half full. I mean, think about that. If you wake up, I had a brothel. If you go to a brothel and you marry to a woman who I was married to, and you go to hang out because you got divorced. You wake up three days later. When you wake up, you got doctors in your face telling that you're never going to walk or talk again. Are you going to get out of that if your glass is not at least full when you pour it? It's the power of God and manifestation. Belief.

10:20Being athletic is like if the ball gets swung in me, I got to know it. I was going in before I shoot it. What can you tell me about how she raised you the 12 years she had with you? Oh, man, just to be support with your love. Be happy and move with grace. Because you were in Miami, you seemed very happy. You seemed to have been liberated. You came with some baggage, right? Because they were just marijuana joints, right? That's enough. Yeah, it was different. It was looked at differently back in your 19. I forgot when I got suspended 2001 or 2003. You might as well tell people that I was sniffing cocaine in the locker room. But perception is a motherfucker, right? And yeah, everybody knew that I had it, though. Like I said before, I always played the game from a point of view.

11:24I had a love for the game. That was obvious. I think being on the team that people expected to lose. I was on the team that lost 20 games in a row by 20. So for a kid that was used to winning most games, are you playing them whether it was football or a Peeley football or basketball, hitting the game against temple, just used to win because of my mentality. It was great. Miami was like a breath of fresh air. What was the clippers experience like? I just wanted to win. So playing on the team that was expected to lose, it was tough. Got a lot of technical files and a lot of offensive files. I didn't think there were offensive files. And it's tough when you just think about being that young and losing 20 games in a row by 20.

12:26It could be depressing. Especially because you've done mostly just winning before that, right? All the way. Like I said before, whether it's Peeley football or a U. A U, I played with Elton Bryan, Ron O'Tess, and Eric Bakley. Basketball was what to you in terms of savior rescuing you? I thought that's exactly what it was. I remember my mom's died. I just went out and shot the ball all night, like to the sun came up. Yeah, I mean, when I was like 10 years old, I kind of put it in my mind that I was going to make it to the NBA one day. And I was David Sterling was going to call my name and kind of made that pack with myself. So unsurprising to you when you get drafted fourth in the first round probably thought you should have gone higher. I should have went number one. Yeah, I think about skill level and how to game played the right way.

13:32Yeah, I should have went number one. How did you end up at Rhode Island? What's the real story? Got caught for cheating on my SAT. I don't get caught for cheating on the SAT now. I don't even know how that goes. All right, I never see that come out the bottom of the screen anymore. Yeah, got caught cheating on my SAT. I don't even think kids get ruled academically and they'll just do anymore. I never see that on the bottom of the screen anymore. That's pretty good. And you know, really good spot to get in. What would you call NIL? I would assume financial contributions. I would assume that part of the reason that you ended up at Rhode Island because it was a really unusual place was because somebody was taking care of you. And I wouldn't have thought anything else. I wasn't on one playing a country. You know, me and T-Mac, one A and one B. He got USA Today and I got Parade magazine played a year 1997.

14:34What was life like back then? What do you remember of that time? Is it just... Well, I'm going to have any bills. So it's just, you know, who and life and a lot of learning. Were you happy though because you've described some of your past as a cesspool of trauma? I've always been. Best life though. Just matters on your path and the road that you're chosen to walk down. My son passed away in 2006. He was six months ago. You know, I don't get any really to that. No, that changes you. Yeah, shit. I'm okay. I'm a man, right? I think about his mother. Well, I don't think it's easy for everybody. I believe me, right?

15:36But, you know, maturity, who knows when it's going to come or how it's going to come. But some of us even when it's supposed to come. You were a kid though for how long? I don't imagine that. Well, as a part of me, that's really still it. I am still a kid. Right? I've probably one of the reasons why I'm probably going to live until I'm 120 because every day feels like yesterday. In what ways are you an adult though? I would think the things that you're talking about with grief would be things that would make you mature. Yeah, well, I think though, it will mix me in adult. Now, I'm the lessons that I can pass down to my children. Like, dealing with the loss. You know, like, just losses. Like, you're not going to have everything for either. Whether it's me or your mother. I don't have very much experience with that. The people who listen to this show know that I lost my little brother three years ago and it was the greatest trauma of my life. Like, just no expectation of it.

16:40Sorry to hear that. Thank you. You are very familiar with this particular subject matter though. Too familiar, I would say. I would say. Who knows, is that a blessing or a curse? Or just a heavy mom in your dad? I do, yes. But my wife just lost her father and now doesn't have either one of her parents. And so there's grief in the home right now in a way that just knocks everything sideways. Like, I'm not equipped. Don't feel strong. I don't feel like I can help her very much. Well, I'm going to let you know, like, from a man's perspective, like, if it makes you cry, cry. Oh, I got no problem with that. Do you? Um, about certain things. I do. I would think that given that I would think growing up in sports, man and black, that it would be a long time before you cried for the first time, just culturally based on you.

17:41Yeah, you're right. I mean, you're right. You're right. I tend to find men to be pretty repressed in this area. 100%. But I could tell you from experience, you should know. Well, what have you learned? No, I'd like to, I would actually like to. I mean, I mean, I never even let myself really sit in, cry about my son. But I think because of the position that I take in my family, like for some stupid reason, right? And you think you have to, um, you know, to be tough and suppress. You just gave me the advice of let yourself do it. Yeah, but, you know, this contradiction that's life. How is it that you maintained? And it wasn't a mask, right? Of happiness or optimism or glass half full when you're saying, when you're describing your cesspool of trauma, the path, just taught by your mother, there have to be other things here

18:43that are allowing you to be that, to summon that, the positivity, how, how were you wearing a mask or were you actually happy? When. I'm going to say from, let's say 12 to, oh, no, that was, that was happy. I've always been a happy person or a happy kid, especially when I was, you know, young. Um, no, no precious, you know, being a kid. Uh, should I probably top my left ball off, my left ball off right now? Who was your support, my grandmother and my mother's mother? And how did she do that? What was she supplying to you and love? My grandmother was born in, uh, Georgia, 1923. And, um, you know, she didn't have one racist born in her body.

19:43She went back to college and graduated at 50 years old. I was probably, she's the only reason why I probably didn't go to the NBA at high school. Because what was she saying? She was just, well, she value education, you know, that much. And when my mother passed away when I was in, uh, eighth grade, seventh grade, eighth grade, I kind of like, for some dumbass reason, I like just put school on a backburn. I never really, even when I can do the work, never really apply it myself like I should have. And, um, you know, now being, you know, 46, 20, 20, I mean, years after the 2015, 10 years, 15 years of the league, I value education just as much as she did. Yeah. Well, you say for some dumbass reading, there was a lack of guidance and you, you were having. I was 12 years old. I know, probably we went through the most trauma that a person could go through. And that's when I was talking about the, you know, I guess you can say, I don't know how I reacted. My mother passed away at 35. If I was 35, I'm see passed away.

20:48You know, but, um, yeah, she's real. What was your grandmother supplying though when you think of her? Oh, she knows she was, you know, Jesus lover. We went to church. Um, you know, even when my mother was here, one of the was here that was instilled in us at a young age and then, you know, um, you know, my, um, my faith was still even before then. Over things that I've seen, you know, I'm growing up. I'm unexplainable. I don't know. I think about that a lot of times and I think about my path in life. I don't know. It's kind of crazy. So Fall and Miami doesn't necessarily mean sweater weather, the way that it does around the rest of the country where you might be listening from, but it does for me,

21:50mean and even busier schedule somehow. And I need dependable clothes that I can throw on without really thinking about it. Like just constant things that I can wear on a daily basis and feel comfortable and feel confident. And that's why Quince has become such an easy part of my wardrobe. They're fitted tees and they're polos. They feel premium. They fit the way I want and they work whether I'm headed over to the studio or if I'm going out afterwards or going to the Marlins game or he game, it doesn't really matter. I'm going to be wearing Quince because Quince also has breathable active wear and 100% Mongolian casual wear sweaters. It started just 60 bucks. I also just recently grabbed a new corduroy jacket that I think is going to be a fall staple for me that you'll see on me on the show. Everything is priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands because they work directly with ethical factories and cut out the middleman. I use Quince and you should too. Find your next fall favorites of Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com slash beach. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns.

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23:53Working out, traveling and explaining basketball to normies for a living, I'll take all the help I can get. So if you want to try momentous signature spec creatine, head to livemomentess.com and use code beach for up to 35% off your entire first order. That's livemomentess.com promo code BECH for up to 35% off. Do you spend any time sort of being introspective or examining how all of this loss has made you who you are, how it changes you, how appreciative you are of moments? Or is it easier to just try not to think about it because who... No, who you got you can't think about. You got to think about life. Yeah, it makes me very reflective and appreciative at the same time. A lot of ifs.

24:56Makes me want to give back as much as possible for some reason, especially with my addict brothers and sisters. Whether it's my time or my story. What is there to be said about your relationship with your father? My father's passed away as well. He was probably my biggest advocate. But that's why I mentioned my addict brothers and sisters because about like a lot of forgiveness that had to take place. And it's easy for me to be empathetic because I had the same problem. Forgiveness, how? How to forgive him for choosing drugs over his family.

25:58Is that a choice though? Like, I mean, that's how a kid would look at it. Yeah, I mean, that's not how it goes, but that's how it went. Right? But I understand why he couldn't make that decision. Do you have any... Excuse me? Why he failed at making the right decision? Do you have any snapshots that remember sort of how he was troubled by heroin addiction? Oh, yeah. I remember how chaotic it was when I went to go, you know, spending night at his home and my grandmother's house. Yeah, those nights were crazy. And I didn't live there. I couldn't imagine what my cousin went through who lived there. And so, basketball ends up raising you? In some sense, I did. How so? In some sense. Oh, give me direction. No purpose. Discipline as well.

26:59Give you worth too, right? I mean, you're... 100%. And so, as you're traveling up the ranks as the number one recruit in America, it's intoxicating, right? Yeah. And a good way. Was there pressure involved with it? Like, when did the pressure arrive? When did the business of it and any of the contaminants arrive? Probably recruiting, I would say. Like, A-U, probably right. A-U-A-H. I mean, all of these things are distorting, right? You lose your mother at 12 years old. You're the number one recruit in America. And now you're surrounded by a whole bunch of people who see money. Trying to eat off you, yeah. I mean, they see money when they look at you. Yeah. You got to grow up fast, right? Decisions on a fly. Now, all of them are going to be the right one. Yeah. I mean, you know, some of those things that happened,

28:00that didn't happen, I kind of learned to live with them. Right? Whether it turned to regret, or, you know, what it went well. Just life. Were you ready in any way with what came next for you the next step on all of this? Not just recruiting, but now you're one of the best college players in the land. I imagine all of its culture shock. I don't know if the Clippers to Miami one was the most of the culture shocks. Like, if you look at all of the places where transition was turbulent for you, what goes to the top of the list? Oh, probably my time from having to leave you in a V2, um, Rhode Island, to pick in the school again. Yeah. Because Rhode Island said, Rhode Island just in terms of a region, unusual, right? Yeah. It was just more, it's more, it's more of state in America. I think my, my, um, my, me growing up in the, um,

29:09um, and, uh, and, and a place like Queens, Queens New York, in the hood of Queens New York probably, you know, built me really to figure it out anywhere. I would imagine though when you say Rhode Island, the biggest of the culture shocks there. At least Las Vegas is somewhat diverse, Brooklyn or Queen's. Yeah, it's just people, but Rhode Island is as small as like is the smallest taking the it's not just small though, it's not, it's super white too. Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of white people, but there's a lot of white people everywhere. Every page, yeah. And so then you get to the pros and, uh, from the beginning, what does it feel like? You, you get drafted, what does draft day feel like? Oh. A party.

30:14But yeah, I was, um, manifestation come true. I did it. Now, how am I going to championship? Actually, that's what I'm thinking. Which you would then go on to do as well. I'll talk to you about that in a second, but what are the details that you remember from draft night? Uh, being drafted and, um, and my grandmother telling me don't give these motherfuckers shit. Yeah, I'll be in a lab. Me kissing her last at the, at the table. And her telling me that, who were the motherfuckers? I don't know. I asked my, uh, people have to tell you, I don't know, but she dusted, came out of love. I mean, but I'm imagining that she was seeing something there that you weren't seeing, right? You're surrounded by whatever. She's an amazing woman. And so she's, she's seeing that you're surrounded by trouble or, uh,

31:15I don't know if it was trouble, but she could probably see life changing, that extreme rate, extreme pace. Were you ready for any of it? Um, yeah. Yeah. You were ready for the basketball. Yeah, and gosh, time and I think I was ready for it. I mean, I was put to you. Um, I mean, who is ready for, and 19 for the unexpected, right? Who's ready for, um, that type of responsibility? What are some of the things you didn't know at 19 or 20 about being an economy, about being a professional, about being, uh, you know, invest in and so many financial, so much financial shit that I'm still learning at 46. Say I put you money up. I, you spend, you know, spending dollars on, you don't have to put three dollars to put it back, make three dollars to put it back in the bank.

32:16You taxed by everybody, little more. This is a little shit financially. How trusting were you? Because I would imagine probably too trusting for somebody to, you know, was going through, that's been through what I've been through. But I mean, I like to, I like, I like people. So that could be, you know, like a fuck you at the end of the day as well. Were you burned a lot when it came to trusting? 100%. I mean, you know, I was, you know, coming out of high school, that's when, um, you know, if you were the best player in, uh, in the country, you could have the option to, you know, go to the NBA. So the landscape of sports of basketball was changing. Um, I call that the peak of my, you know, when I was growing up, part of my career that I got to experience firsthand.

33:17What do you remember about the people who hurt you on, um, misstrust? Yeah, you know, so I don't really even, uh, uh, the only thing I used the past for honestly is the kind of push me, you know, to stab me in the right direction. Um, you know, when we talk about, you know, the brothel and, uh, whatever the fuck happened in the past, I didn't go right. I got to kind of use it as therapeutic, you know what I mean? And just to push me in the right, you know, when it comes to my decision, my day-to-day decision make. You mentioned the word can't live in it too much because I wouldn't, you know, be able to do interviews like that. It'd be too much pain. It might be, you know, um, traumatizing or traumatic to the point where it might work as a trigger. You know what I mean? Oh, well, then this becomes dangerous, right? Yeah, yeah. So this is like, this is why I was like, I don't know, I'm not gonna say it's big. You know, for me to do this, but I just like, you know, yeah, mentally, right?

34:19To be really draining even, you know, going down somebody's roads, even those, is my life. I appreciate you doing it for a number of reasons. No, thank you for that. And, and I don't, I look, I think somebody giving you a story, uh, their story is a treasure. And I think it should be treated with care and for it in a book. And you've done a documentary and in those things, it's clear that you would like to be helpful to others because addiction is a poison that can really, well, I think because of what I've, you know, came from and gone through that probably has to be part of my purpose, right? Not just to myself, but to my higher power. I don't get grudgesis or ala or yaw way, you know, wherever it is, whatever God I believe in. Um, you know, I try to use my, my story to, um, you know, to help others. So no matter how traumatic it may make me feel at the time, I guess that's the sacrifice, you know, for me to get over is just to help just one person really.

35:24Right. And have you found that you have with the book in the documentary? Why did you make, why did you decide to do those things? Cause they're, you, you chose to be very revealing. For those reasons, for those reasons, cause I think, you know, that, you know, my story is shit is that impactful, right? For some people that, you know, look up to you or maybe put you on a hot pedestal and just to know that I'm, you know, can be beat down just like any other man, right? When it comes to, um, to addiction, and I seem to happen. I just, and I just, I know my influence, and I, you know, understand my purpose. I sometimes take us to, you know, I guess go through hell to see heaven and things and like, right. I'm not trying to be weird. Anything. I'm just trying to give you my insight. No, I appreciate it. Like, I know that, forgive me because of the idea of an interview, can be so intimate that if, uh, your reticent or worried about triggers, then, no, no, I'm not worried.

36:29Um, you're going to my, I'm doing that. I do appreciate, though, the, the fact that going back to, what it is that you were doing in Miami, you came and you, uh, you brought life to a team that also reinvigorated, uh, whatever it is that the losing had taken away from you. And the idea that you would miss Pat Riley and extreme discipline. Like, if I go back now and just put you, uh, in that first month, what are you not in the shapes that they demand you being? I wasn't pretty good shape. Yeah, my trainer, Robbie Davis, at the time, he had me, um, oh man and, and, and tip top shape. So if I add that on, what, how they whip me into shape, we had a really strong athlete. So what do you remember? Like, what do you remember about the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the line, the line, the line, the line, get your ass on the line. But now I remember, I'll,

37:32I'll care remember, um, training camp, like not going home, our mother, remember them, them pulling off the mats and us staying, um, in a facility, um, how we bond it really quick to, that's a huge, you were forced to stay there. You had to, you guys had to stay, you go home, you know what I mean? And real estate is like, I don't think you're gonna want to go home. Probably just stay here. Um, I remember the team bonding. I remember us not starting well, but ending well. Who did you bond with immediately? Wayne, um, all the coaches, coaches, coaches, coaches, coaches, really in particular. What are the examples that you could give me of the differences between the Clippers and Miami? Just defense, just culture. Like, you know, Pat was already a basketball guard. Of course, he's running Miami at the time. Um,

38:33um, you know, Elgin is a basketball guard, but he's not willing to, he's not able to, um, express the impact that he had on basketball. So it's like a losing situation. Was winning mentality and losing the losing mentality really? Was there a lot of temptation in Miami? Of course. I was Miami. But, you know, Pat made me, um, move my family, my kids and their mother to Miami too, in order to, um, pay me and stuff like that. He was, you know, in particular, me, um, you know, taking care of myself. What was that coming from? Getting some sleep. I respect Pat so much. You know, because it's not just a game, you know, how I played the game, you know, I was looked up to Madden Johnson. So that's Madden Johnson's coach. Right. That he's one with, of course, from coaching cream, I do your balls. Always been the best player in New York City basketball history.

39:38He had a lot of things that I wanted. What was the conversation like where he's telling you that's that Oh, it was intense, but he's, you know, he on bullshit. You know, you respect that, especially coming from, um, you know, a place like Clippers where you know, kind of lowballed me as far as my contract was concerned. And, you know, he gave me, um, what he gave me because, like, you know, it's penalty if you get, you know, suspended twice was, you know, smoking marijuana and second suspension came right before, um, my free agent contract. So you respect that. Yeah. Because that's, that's a bit of an infringement, right, to tell a grown man how he has to live. I mean, not, but no, there's rules. You know, and you got to abide by the rules. Well, but in order to, you know, proceed, not just, um, as a sportsman, but just in life. Right.

40:38How shit goes? Do you respond well to tough love? I think I was probably well to love. I mean, if you're going to give it to me tough, then that's your delivery. That's how I'm going to learn. Where do you feel like you did the most basketball learning? Um, of course under a patent, Phil Jackson playing the triangle offense, but I would think growing up, teaching you where the objective is to play against somebody bigger, better and stronger than you every day. Really, that's how I got better. It's funny because like, you know, going home and, you know, throwing my books down and going straight to the park, I didn't really realize that

41:39I was just honing my basketball skills. Honestly, how young, uh, did basketball become your identity? 10. Do you remember what do you remember about that age? Couldn't wait to watch. Couldn't wait to play. Are the posters up on in your room? Like what do you, what, who are you idolizing? What are you? From the beginning, you had the, that's, that's, that's, I'm going to be the, I want to play the point. God, some, some, the only way I regret and college is that I didn't make Jim Harris, um, play me at point guard to get drafted as a point guard. Really? Yeah. What would you say your identity is today? Father, businessman, worker, hard worker. I,

42:40I don't think I get enough credit for shooting a reality show and while I was in season, that's hard to do. And that reality show, you know what I mean? Like, come on, bro. I don't think you're going to remember this. You're not going to remember this, but we one time had you call into our radio show on the night before there was a conundrum that we were talking about where one guy had a bunch of friends who didn't approve of who he was marrying. And we asked you the question, just can you give us some advice on how to handle this situation? And we said, if you had thought about it, because you came in and you're like, this is what you do. You have one of the boys, the boy that you trust the most, go to him and say one time and one time only, this is a disapproval that I have. And you never mention again and you walk away. What kind of advice were you getting about that reality show? And, and all of that, because I would imagine all of that is just totally distorting. You're in Los Angeles, you're playing basketball, you're winning a championship, and also you're in the middle of a reality televised swirl to do all that.

43:45Well, everybody thought it was going to be distracting for obvious reasons. But that's what made me kind of like say, all right, I'm going to do it because nobody think it could be done. That's what kind of gave me like, okay. And nobody's done it before. And probably I was going to do it again. It just kind of all fell in line. Right? That's how you got to understand how life works. Even think I have two people so similar, but their past be like, totally different. Did the team of the league ever talk to you about any of that? Are you going to do it anyway? Once I got to okay from the best owner in sports, ever, Genie Bus to do it, and the bus family to do it, and Kobe blessed it then. Why not? And just kind of was like easy. I was my wife, her profession, Dan, the biggest reality family ever. I'm with the biggest past, biggest basketball franchise ever. Fuck it. It's crazy, but it was, it was, yeah, it was tough.

44:53It was so I was work. I would work so much so hard. It drove me to like how to amount of insomnia. Well, I couldn't sleep. My pride was the most frustrating thing about it, but I would do it again because you were just going all the time. It's two full time jobs, right? And and you've got to be in shape. And the basketball one has to have your attention like you can't do. What happens is the thing was good about it professionally as an athlete is that you trick yourself like because the basketball thing got to work. Like the basketball thing, the work didn't just go full part, but you kind of trick yourself into just like bucket. But it was, it's kind of given me the mindset like I could do it. No, I could do it. You know what I mean? I've talked myself into I could do it. I can get it done.

45:56You said you'd do it again. Which parts of it might you do differently? I would appreciate the grind. You know what I mean? Sometimes when you call it in it, you don't really get to appreciate what you're doing. Like don't get to take a step back and like, you know, but I would just really not pat myself on the back, but really like it's like a long. You really don't do it. Don't do it. So you'd allow yourself to be both proud of yourself and experience some joy in the doing of it. Like you weren't you weren't enjoying it. I mean, it was it. It had to be done. There's no only way for it to get done is for it to get done. Get

46:57or done. It's what we call it. Right. But I was getting it done to kept me sharp. Why did you decide to do all of it? I just I love staying busy and that when it comes to that. You know, like, you know, like sometimes, you know, like when I, you know, I want to work so much now, kind of like see myself with opportunities and sometimes I'm letting them like bump heads and just willing to just kind of take on everything and it's just to kind of stay busy. I'm almost, you know, I'm going to drive myself crazy with work. I know what hard hard work I've seen it. It pays off. It pays off. But also given everything you've been through, it's an excellent place to hide. I can't hide anywhere. I'm not going anywhere. Life's life. All the time. Everything is going to be exposed. You remember not sleeping though? Is it because it's because

48:03there was too much that had to be done? Is it because life was just a whirlwind? I wish I don't know what caused that. I don't know. I don't know what caused that. But it was just something that I went through at the time. How long did that last? Because in some years? Yeah, a couple of months. It's frustrating really. I'm expressing I'm 16. So I obviously I like I love to sleep. You sleep. So you grow when you sleep. But like I say, I like to stay busy. But you don't know what was happening there. Like were you restless? Were you stressed? I don't know if it was stressed or good stress or bad stress. I just know I couldn't you know, have some sleep. But you know, like I said, I like to stay busy. How did the show change your life? How did this doing the show change my life? Well,

49:04they used to call me Lamy on the show. It was my nickname on the show. And I would say because of the Kardashians, I would say Lamy is I don't know if you want to say Lamy's an icon or if you want to label them, if you want to put Lamy in at same level, but known like globally. And I was proved that I just went to Ireland last month for a quick gig. And when I'm watching TV and Chloe Lamar is on in Ireland, reruns reruns reruns reruns. And just life is just trippy like that. I could think about so many wrongs just that I've done like to myself or not treated myself the way I've treated myself. And still, I just

50:12just been outrageously like blessed bro. Just fucking waste. Lamy. But somewhere is just like such a fucked up guy. I got you know, I said joke. I can just I'm joking. We laugh. I'm sitting here joking to myself for some I'm joking. I don't think I'm a fucked up guy, but I don't know where it comes from bro. Like always got a second opportunity to make right. Right. I think a good cause comes from you know me treating people the right way or at least how I want to be treated. It's like simple arithmetic ways of life that I've been treated that I've tried to pass down to my kids and like just be respectful on my people respect you. Right. You know what I mean? And I don't know. Just blessings on blessings on blessings every day. I'm like every week. It's like my goal is to meet as many people as I can to like change my life. You know, don't work my way to

51:18be an hours one day. So I can be hopefully be the biggest philanthropy best world coach the world known to know. Be a hell of a comeback story. It's all about to come back. Lambie's more famous than Lamar. 100% 100% 100% Lamar's shy quiet. You know what I mean? Lambie's a little bit more spontaneous or could make spontaneous conversation. Right. Whether it's forced or learned. But Lambie is global. Who do you like better? Lamar. Were you performing on that show? No. So it was also the real you, right? Yeah, it was. It was me.

52:20I think that's why it came across. So, you know, genuine organic slide did so well. So I saw so many people was on. Responded to it. What was the math that you were doing in your head about choosing it? Like why did you choose to do that? Did you want to be more famous? Nah. That's the thing that's crazy. That just came from, you know, being a Laker and marrying someone that was famous. I'm never that out of body. You know what I mean? Like I'm really like, I don't know. I don't even really consider myself a celebrity. I'm just like, good-bye. Just living. You know what I mean? I can't help it. The path that I'm chosen to walk. But you're craving something in your way. And people look at me. I didn't. Wasn't craving anything about marrying. No, not by marrying. I didn't say by marrying, by doing the television show, by being in the like, I was just doing my wife's business. What are I wasn't

53:24craving to be more famous. But you could choose not to, right? And in fact, I was just, I was just supporting my wife and what she was doing. I didn't choose to be more famous because I am who I am, no matter what I do. I don't know how, I didn't know how the people were going to respond to it. I don't know if they were going to make me like me more or hate me. So that's what's kind of risky. You don't know how you're going to come off in that, you know, type of atmosphere the first time doing it. But you know, I guess I'm a rata. So Fall and Miami doesn't necessarily mean sweater weather the way that it does around the rest of the country where you might be listening from. But it does for me mean an even busier schedule somehow. And I need dependable clothes that I can throw on without really thinking about it. Like just constant things that I can wear on a daily basis and feel comfortable and feel confident. And that's why Quince has become such an easy part of my wardrobe. They're fitted tees and they're polos. They feel premium. They fit the way I want and they work whether I'm headed over

54:27to the studio or if I'm going out afterwards or going to the Marlins game or he game, it doesn't really matter. I'm going to be wearing Quince because Quince also has breathable active wear and 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters. It started just 60 bucks. I also just recently grabbed a new corduroy jacket that I think is going to be a fall staple for me that you'll see on me on the show. Everything is priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands because they work directly with ethical factories and cut out the middleman. I use Quince and you should too. Find your next fall favorites of Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com slash beach. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. That's QUINCE.com slash beach.

55:40Where would you say that you were happiest along the professional basketball path? Like of all the stops and all of the places, when you look back on it, when is it that you say that's the high point of happiness? Is it winning championships? 100%. The champagne being poured. Being the team that's the best team at the end of the playoffs. 100%. That's like, it's orgasm, I think about it. End you in LA. You were at Laker. I think that's the last team. You know, went to Europe. Kobe's last two.

56:40That's life changing if you don't get it. Or if you're not a celebrity off the court, always remember. Kobe went to visit you and rehab, right? No, and when I was in a calmly city, he came to hospital. Derek Fisher and Rick Fox tell the stories of Kobe testing them until they're willing to fight, doing some things that can be dickish to see if they have that fight in them. Like sort of taking their spots and sprinting lanes or whatever, just trying to see what's in them. What are some of the Kobe stories that you have that like a remember? That I see in them. Test people. Well said he was, he was elbowing, Sasha before we jump ball and practice. When you got a player like that, that's good. And you see that he wanted that much.

57:44And that's, you know, willing to give that much to the game, that, you know, feel professional athlete playing at that level. And you made it to level one. You see somebody giving that much to the game. And that's it. Don't rub off on you then. You kind of missing it. Was there anything though that is particularly memorable in terms of him toughening up teammates or leadership or anything in that regard where you. Oh, that's just day to day practice, bro. You know, I mean, he just gave so hard. And you see obviously we did on a court and end game. Now you just follow suit easy. He, you know, he led by example so easy. He didn't really have to say much.

58:45I don't really think they make too many players like that. And just wanted it in a way that was overtly obvious to everyone that was more than everyone else wanted. It. That fucking playing the games fucking pinky pop out. It don't matter. You know what I mean? A little bit crazy though. No, right? Yeah. So as an athlete, you know, to get there, you go, we all got a little crazy. And that's, that's all right. As a man, somebody knows that some of the craziest things we go to kind of make us respond. Do you enjoy watching the game today because it's a little bit different than the one you were playing? I think that's why I'm trying to subject myself in it so much. So my thing part of my mission in life is to, you know, help save God's game. I think I'm that close to God that maybe you've saved me for that one of

59:48one of those reasons. It needs saving. Yeah. Yeah. So all the three's drive you crazy? Yeah. The teaching like, like for most players, they're not understanding at the most important side is from from 15 feet on out. Really? And yeah, layups run into the corner. Well, you say it's the most important shopper. All the data and analytics now say that's the most that's not the game that's that an analytic down analytics on one championship. The defense does shooting the ball from the right place. Well, rest of the shit is just pick up basketball to me honestly. Because I could tell you the responsibility from the center to the point guard. You know what I mean? And offensively and defensively.

1:00:49You're watching, you know, all these point guards, you gotta stop the ball. You're the first man. When the ball's coming up, right? You're the first guy. They get past you easy, right? It's hell to pay. But and then what really the fast break they run to the corner. Remember the first time I saw that was fucking great. That's like that. Come on, every like every like every like, every trying to teach through like kids how to play basketball. Think about getting a 10 year old kid. And the first ever any 10 year old kid, if you like take him to the park right now, he don't fucking go it up from as far as possible. That's death curries greatness. Of his game. But young man. For you, I think it's just start near the rim off the box, off the white box. Start there. I think that's why I wanted, you know, one day have trying to go basketball academies. Right? And do kind of like what they're doing. Europe.

1:01:51Bring back the 15 footer and the fundamentals. You know, you know, really like if I'm watching the basketball game, like I'm watching this post of God, see him got his hip is half position. I'm watching God. He can't deliver the ball into the post because he might be pressured a little bit. So bad. I remember the first time I saw what you're talking about. It was those warriors. They're on a three on one fast break and play and step go to the corners. And I'm like, what are they doing? If you're team, but like, and but you know, it's so just bad for, you know, I want one day that for the USA basketball for their offense to be the triangle offense. I'm laughing at the sound of that burp at the end of what it is you said. No, seriously, but it's like, it's half me to watch.

1:02:53Michael Jordan and Kobe Bryant. I mean, it tame them. They're aggressive mentality, which to some would be called selfishness. The only thing to tame, right? But in his one, I thought the NBA was a copycat league. I asked one, you know, I'm like, exactly what I said. I don't know if you know, but last great success that the Lakers have had have been in this offense. That damn, the crowd almost even knows when somebody's going to catch a defense post and go back to the kids don't want to ride. Okay. Well, the corner three is the most efficient shot in basketball. I'm always in a triangle offense. And then you can run a pick and roll out that corner. And then, you know, whatever. It's no, there's almost hard. Just like, for somebody that loves the game

1:03:58so much, as I do. It's been okay. I've been okay as a player. But you know, like the Nick has got it done. They brought the game back home, right to the guard, probably way above the lungs, right? New York is the birth. I mean, we'll say the mother and father basketball here in America. I would say Brunton just got hot and some pickup games. If I asked you what you're prouder of, is it winning a championship in Los Angeles or is it being the best player coming out of New York at the time that everybody was competing to be the best player coming out of New York? When I'd say, be sure. The only reason I asked the questions is because I don't think most people understand just quite how much pride the New York basketball. Oh, yeah, obviously. You've seen it in full in full. Yeah, you've seen it in full force. Yeah, you've seen it in full force. Real time. Real time. When would you say that you felt

1:05:08like you knew or could admit or identified, I am a drug addict. I can't remember the exact time, but oh man, so many different stories. Shit. I mean, it's so many different times. I probably can't even think. Oh, probably my first, actually, I was a good question, but it's my first time that we have. My first time. Yeah. When was that? I don't know the year exactly. It wouldn't have been with the Clippers though, right? Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Everyone had it wrong when you're coming,

1:06:13like that was just an antiquated way of looking at things when you were getting gonged for drug tests with the Clippers and people are like, that was drugs. That was well marijuana suspension. That's what I'm saying. Like that's just, no, I was saying when I was a drug addict, just period, like when I was in rehab. Yeah. Yeah. Like my first like damn boy, like what you're doing? You hadn't tried a harder drug before Miami, correct? No, yeah. And why and what happened there that made, you want to dabble? Well, not do it before. And then all of a sudden, you're like, now I'm going to to try this, even though I don't think I have any sort of problem. The reason I've never tried cocaine is because I have an addictive personality. And I know that if I like something too much, you know, I can't, I can't do that. Like I know that about myself. What are you laughing about? I'm having a, a responsive joke in my head to what you just said. I'll save it. You're going

1:07:20to keep it to yourself. It seemed like it was really funny. Yeah, it was funny. It was funny. But okay, let's get back to the question. I was saying why and what happened that you decided to try that cocaine. Yeah, and I was, I forgot what happened. I was in, I was in Miami. I was chilling at the show club. Never tried it. My best friend at the time, I kind of had to feel that he was dizzling dabble and and he was with me and I was just a couple. I said, the show club, until I'm the bungalows and she liked that. And this lady just asked me, she was a husband, said, you know, he can get his cocaine and try it. Whatever. So I don't know, but I think I could ask my friend and he was able to track some down for him and just lady, I made a teller husband and leave or whatever she tried. So I'm not sure. So I'm whatever. And um, yeah, kind of like fucking me up, opening up a vote. I wish I wish I never opened really.

1:08:24Honestly, that feeling because you, when you're on that, you're like, you're chasing the dragon. Right. So that's you got, you got good sense because you got good sense because you don't want to even open up that vote because you're trying to get chasing that. You want to chase that first feeling always, you don't feel like that. In a road of bad decisions. Did it immediately become a problem like as soon as you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, they took time. Took years. Do you know how many times you've been to rehab? Um, three times, three times, two of cocaine is one last time from marijuana. I was fucking speeding and vaguism. No, almost dead. Just put the joint out and uh, clipped it. And I went up right before I put it out, I was driving like a hundred and fourteen miles per hour and uh, wound up going to jail. Got night.

1:09:33And my mother was a correction over some of my guys island. I give you quick story. And I remember dropping me off at my father's project one night and um, my um, I'm getting out the car. All these little kids come running out. Says, oh, little Joe is here. My father name is Joseph. Little Joe is here. Little Joe is here. Little Joe is here. This is me when I was 12 o'clock a night, almost one o'clock in night. And right before, right before I got out the car, my family pet name was muka muka. And right before I'm getting up the car, my mother grabbed my arm and she said, muka, if you ever go to jail, that's when I'm gonna stop fucking with you. And so I went to jail that night and that's all I played over my head over and over and over and over again. Fuck. Yeah, that shit was like fucking playing a track on repeat in my head. And I fucking jailed myself 14 hours as I lay from marijuana and Vegas is a legal state.

1:10:46And that was the last time I've been rehab. But that was my most, that was my most, um, uh, I think that was the best time I've probably ever had a rehab if you can have a good time I rehab because it was a, um, uh, a counselor who was my, um, probably my mentor and that, um, stage of my life. Um, his name is, um, Vincent Frank. He's a rehabilitation gangster, like a German gangster for real for, and um, his help me take, um, you know, rehab like I really, really like seriously time learned from it. My first 30 days of rehab, I went to the N A and A meetings. So how could you not learn that if you're having an open heart for change? And yeah, I just want to use my, you know, that, you know, my story of two, um,

1:11:49to help people. I think that's why people identify with that Netflix special so much. You know, because there's no doubt in my mind after the pandemic, a lot of people went through some type of depression, anxiety, probably fucked around a little bit when they were didn't really fuck around a little bit before maybe drink a little bit more. You know what I mean? I did. Yeah, I drive, I was drinking more during the pandemic. I don't normally do. I think a lot of people resonated. It was number two, number three globally for a little bit. I don't think it was that good. I haven't even watched all of it. No. No. Why not? I know the story. And, and, and from what I was told, they didn't really, um, you know, glorified a part that I didn't do drugs. I mean, I don't know if you're a Lamar fan or if they're any Lamar fans or anybody's gonna forgive a fuck, but I thought that was like the whole gonna be the whole point. You know what I mean? Um, you feel me? But you were

1:12:53hoping that the story they told was about the helping that you're trying to do with this because I do. And I mean, I don't know. I didn't watch it. So I don't want to point Flick's at net, at net Flick's and say, you know, the point didn't get come across. It was number two, number three globally. And I think that's the only reason why people care because how they personally been affected. Because of addiction, because I think a lot of people have been, right? And don't have the opportunity to come out to even talk about, or maybe even get help. Well, you think that's helping. Your story is different for sports fans. Like it's a different story. Well, not for sports fans for addicts. Well, no, but I'm saying it's different force. Yes, it's different. It's different in a lot of ways. But there's also addiction makes people high and be shameful for obvious reasons, right?

1:13:54I heard a lot of relationships get hurt. My kids were on there and they were able to talk a little bit about how they've been affected. So it was like a family structure system that gets fucked up. You know, especially when so much somebody that has so much responsibility in their family as much as me, but can't help it because they're fucking, you know, want to get low. That's what I call it. I don't call it getting high. You know, I call it getting low. They can't help themselves. No, and this is my time to like talk and preach about addiction addiction. You know, addicts, they suffer from brain disease. Okay? So you can imagine if you have a disease brain and you don't know it, or if you do know it and you, you know, continue to give this disease brain more drugs, more alcohol, alcohol is a drug. You're gonna give it more, feed it more. You know, you could imagine the outcome for people acting up or acting out. I mean, it's, it can be hereditary. It's passed down.

1:15:01I think it was in my case, I think it was passed down. And so now me as an educator now is me up to me, like not trying to pass that down to my children, or at least educate them. This is much as possible. Let them know that they might have that genetic disease. It must worry you right? Like it's... Yeah, I think there's more things that probably, you know, yeah, worry me, you know, more, but it's like, you know, what they tell you in the airplane, if shit goes down, there it goes down, there it goes wrong. Fuck, come on, you got to put your mask on first, put it up to somebody else. It's probably one of the hardest things for us to do is parents, but overall, if I'm from old, I'm gonna take care of it, I'm gonna hold them then. You know, none of these jewels or

1:16:03shit that I've been through, I ain't gonna be able to get passed down, not the right way. Why do you think you didn't learn anything or learn more of the first two trips to rehab? Maybe because we were in my heart, was that, no, the first two times? Probably I went, I couldn't wait to get the 30 days over with just to get the fuck out of here. Especially the first time. I know a lot of people have been incarcerated. I think that was like the first time, that was like my first kite to everybody. I know they've been incarcerated like my heart reached out to Elle and I'm like, I knew how it felt, and I could get up and leave. You know what I mean? It was a real, a real like moment of reflection. You mentioned being in jail and it sounded like, yeah, I went to jail.

1:17:07But it sounded like shame. It sounded like what you were describing, thinking of your mother. Yeah, I was definitely shamed. Where does it rank in terms of how much shame there has been around this for you, the times that you have felt shame around whatever is public embarrassment or anything that feels bad because you've let people down or hurt them? It's crazy because that, that, you know, how that, but that night in jail led to so much good. So it's like I always tried to tell you how my glass is always like half full. Like they were both some good. They came out of it. You know, at the end of the day. Well, rehab got to reach you. Yeah, I've met a friend for life who, if I had a problem, at four in the morning. And if I had two lines of cocaine in front of me at four in the morning,

1:18:09talking over, you know, real venturing, some help man come help me, talk me out of this. He would be there. I know he would be there. And I went to mate. I went to met him and if I didn't go to rehab, this last thing. So it's crazy how life is just so, you know, when I think I'm down, I'm never out. It's always time to learn. Grandma told me stop learning and you stop living. Do you ever feel like you can have a handle on this or that's, that runs against the nature of what it is to admit that you're an addict to think that you've actually, but you should always try to handle it every day, right? And if I'm not getting high every day, I'm working on, you know, hailing it the right way. I'm going to lighten this up a little bit with an assortment of questions that will speed up this interview. Okay. They're going to be quicker questions.

1:19:09That's one quick answer. No, you can do it however it is. You can do it, but there's a little bit of fill in the blank involved. A television show that is the one show if I only allow you on an island with one show that you're going to be with. A television show? Yes. One television show you would want to watch. Fresh principale. A movie that you will stop on every time in the hotel room. Hurricane. Really? Yeah. A candy you can't live without. Salah Pawe Apple. The greatest defender you ever ran across was blank. Ron Autos. The toughest player you've ever run across is blank. Tracing a grade. The best leader you have ever seen is blank. Kobe Bryant. The smartest player you have ever seen is blank. Matajasa. An irrational fear you have. Irrational fear. Swimming.

1:20:13What is the weirdest combination of foods you will put together? Korean soul. Give me a word you want your friends to use to describe you. Legend. Do you want to know how you die? Do I want to know how would you want to know? Yeah. You would want to know that. Why would you want to know that? Do you think? Just curious. I know because I know how I'm going to die. You do? I'm going to be on a beat to turn. Tux and cake goes on to be 120. The thing that you find hard to forgive about yourself. Hard to forgive yourself for.

1:21:22Lying. You enjoy this more than the previous part. You enjoy the quite. I get better in the fourth quarter. Well the game is over. Thank you for playing it with us Lamar. I appreciate your time. No problem there. It was my pleasure. All right everyone. Welcome to ARCO Rewards Orientation. I'm Hannah. Whoa. Is everything okay? That's a code green. Someone just earned at least five cents a gallon in rewards. Wow. Another one? Well that one's a code gold. The customer just redeemed savings up to a dollar a gallon. Impressive. What does that one mean? Oh that's just picky. He gets excited when we talk about rewards. Savings up to one dollar per gallon redeemable with 20 rewards dollars in your loyalty account at participating locations, terms and conditions apply.