207 - Dating with Dyslexia - These Tips Apply to Many
About this episode
Russell's Background
Russell Van Brocklen discovered his dyslexia in third grade and later audited law school classes despite having first-grade reading/writing levels. After successfully improving his skills, he developed programs to help dyslexic students, including one funded by New York State Senate that helped high schoolers jump 6-8 grade levels in writing within a year.
Dating Strategy Framework
Russell teaches a research-based approach adapted from "The Craft of Research" to overcome dating fears. The method involves:
1) Establishing context (e.g., "dyslexic person in mid-twenties afraid of rejection")
2) Simplifying to core problem
3) Identifying universal themes (like "fear" or "rejection")
4) Flipping negatives to positives and leveraging dyslexic strengths like intelligence and communication skills.
Technology Tools
For reading dating profiles: Speechify app, which offers premium voices that sound more natural than the free robotic version. For writing messages: ChatGPT Pro with specific prompts for warm, empathetic, and positive tone - Russell recommends using the advanced voice feature to dictate and refine messages through conversation. Alternative: seek advice from trusted friends in successful relationships, preferably meeting at public venues.
Disclosure Timing
Wait until after the third date to mention dyslexia. Most people won't notice initially. Let natural conversation reveal it rather than making formal announcements. Russell suggests gradually stopping use of assistive technologies so partners naturally pick up on differences.
Long-Term Relationship Advice
Partners should understand dyslexics think rapidly and scatter-brained, like "absent-minded professors." Key advice: let dyslexic partners express ideas freely without immediate organization, then help structure thoughts afterward. Dyslexics should identify their weaknesses and see if partners can shoulder those responsibilities while dyslexics handle their strengths.
Contact
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Music by Successful Motivation
Artwork photo by Elevate
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