Your Body Remembers What Your Mind Forgets - (With John Kilmer)

What if your body has been keeping a record your mind never agreed to? In this episode, Glenn and Phyllis sit down with John Kilmer — occupational therapist, life coach, and newly certified Connection Coder — for a conversation about how emotion lives in the body long after the moment has passed. John shares what it was like to grow up between countries, why a hospital stay at 18 months still shapes how he trusts, and how his five-year-old recently named his own fear and shame out loud instead of hiding it. Phyllis opens up about coming to the U.S. as a child who couldn't yet read or write English, and learning to disappear. Together they unpack somatic work, the nervous system, and why simply being present in our own bodies can feel terrifying — and freeing.

In this episode:

• How a five-year-old used the Core Emotion Wheel to self-disclose instead of hide
• Why "the issues are in the tissues" — and what somatic work actually means
• The 90-second life of an emotion, and what happens when we cut it short
• Growing up as a "third culture kid" and the quiet grief no one named
• Why looking into another person's eyes for four minutes changes us biochemically
• Loneliness, isolated mothers, and the tools we were never given
• John walks the Core Emotion Wheel live to close the episode

About John Kilmer: John is an occupational therapist and life coach in rural Washington State, trained in somatic and polyvagal-informed approaches to trauma. A recent graduate of the School of Connection and a newly certified Connection Codes coach, he brings a deep love of embodiment work and a story shaped by years living in Lebanon and Kenya.

Resources mentioned:

• The Core Emotion Wheel (free download) → connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew
• Find a certified Connection Codes coach → connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu
• Reach John directly → [email protected]

Check out our new website → connectioncodes.co

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