Why you crave external validation (and what it’s really costing your business)

If you secretly need someone to tell you you’re doing a good job just to believe you’re not screwing it all up—this one’s for you.

After years crushing it in corporate, Donna and Cheryl built a business from scratch. But the real shock? Losing the constant feedback loop—no performance reviews, no gold stars, no ‘great work’ emails—and realising they didn’t actually know how to trust themselves.

This episode is the real talk about why female founders crave validation (even when we think we’re confident) and how that craving silently slows down your decisions, messes with your leadership, and keeps you playing smaller than you realise.

Here’s what we get into:

• (01:24) From corporate besties to business partners—how they made the leap
• (03:53) The six months they spent with zero clients (and how they didn’t quit)
• (06:55) Why leaving corporate didn’t magically boost their confidence
• (10:54) Why being good at your job makes trusting yourself in business harder
• (14:13) The sneaky ways external validation still ran the show (and how they spotted it)
• (15:49) How they stopped looking for feedback—and started backing themselves
• (20:08) How to find proof you can do this—even if you’re too deep in self-doubt to see it
• (22:58) The pressure of being the first woman in your family to break the mold
• (27:11) Why you can’t ‘wake up’ people who aren’t ready—and why that’s none of your business
• (31:27) Why external validation will never make you feel like enough (and how to stop needing it)
• (36:08) What they teach inside ‘The Real You’—and why every founder needs to do this work

If you’re building a business but still secretly hoping someone will tell you you’re doing it ‘right,’ this is your wake-up call.

Go listen, then DM me: what’s one decision you’ve been holding off because you’re waiting for a sign?

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About Emily:
Emily Rose Dallara supercharges teams and leaders using a nervous system first approach.

With over 10 years of experience scaling marketing teams as a CMO, globally in Web3, startups, and crypto, Emily combines her expertise as a growth advisor & leadership coach with nervous system and energy management tools to optimize team performance and leadership dynamics.

She’s also a qualified somatic practitioner, a baby DJ + dog mom.

Awards: Emily was voted a Top Woman of the Future 2022 and a Woman in Web 3 Changemaker by NEAR Foundation, 2023.