Why Do The Kindest People Suffer The Most? | Discord Stage #41

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1:02Springfest means more sun, more fun, and more free at Loves. Keep your yard in line with an additional free EGO 56 volt battery. When you buy a select EGO mower, trimmer, or blower, plus keep landscaping fresh with staggering one cubic foot garden soil. Five bags for $10. Our best lineup is here at Loves. Welcome back to another Discord stage. This is where I talk directly with my community. I tell personal stories, share deep biblical learnings, and I answer questions from the chat. These episodes are audio only, so thanks for listening. And you can join my Discord to catch the next Discord stage live. Link in the description. How do I get rid of wanting to talk so much about God? I'm not sitting and don't want to trade people away. No, I'm by believing that. Believing that. Talking about God is not a feeling. It's a surrender. The more you know about God, the less you actually talk about him.

2:02And the more you start to reflect him, a lot of people talk, but they don't reflect him. Our job is to reflect him, right? So you'll learn the more you guys preach the gospel, the less you actually preach about it, and the more you kind of live about it. And the more you kind of just show Jesus in your life day to day. That's just how it is, you know? And so it's really cool. It's not really much that you have to do. You just, I would rather not speak and kind of learn, you know, biblically, all right? Thank you for all you do. I have a hard time not talking about God with my family, and to some of them, it's a hard topic. How can I be there for them without bringing up God? As a solution. Just be there to listen to them. A lot of people just want to be heard. And when people are understood and heard, they're more inclined to also listen. Ask questions like, can I, you know, can I suggest something or can I share this with you?

3:04Like these little questions kind of allow people to put their guards down. There's so many people with their guards up. It's kind of crazy. And it's just how it is, you know? So yeah, I had some joe who was witness called to my door the other day. I was very nice to them and let them talk. We ended up having a really interesting conversation. I was actually able to give them back some scripture only because of things you've spoken about before. They were very interested. And you've been asked me where I learned what I know. So I told them about you and that you're amazing. One thing that really stood out to me while listening to them was how strongly they focused on the name Yahova in the Bible. Find myself very stuck by that, struck by that, and just wanted to ask why that is. I found it really interesting. Why they're stuck on it or why God's name is Yahova, right? It's a two-part question, but yeah. Hey, Pastor, I've been placing a position at church where I can share the gospel. I learned a lot, but there's times where my mind goes blank and I ask myself, do I even know what the gospel is?

4:05I get asked for advice and oftentimes I feel like I just yap it. I don't know what I'm saying. I brought it to God in prayer often. Bring it to Pastor. You're not alone. You have resources like Pastor that you can share, you know, with Pastor, right? So bring your resources to Pastor, your Pastor, and I believe God will work, amen. No worries. You guys are welcome. Just caught up on the last five to six main stages where Pastor Johnny cried, how are you now? Thanks for being here. Yeah, I'm good. I'm great. Even when I cry, I'm great, right? God is good. Genuinely, like, he's amazing. So good afternoon, so I'm struggling with anger and sadness. I found out my ex three years has already got a new boyfriend after five months of the breakup. How do I steer away from this? It's a good thing that they moved on because a lot of the times God will remove to expose. It's normal to be sad, it's normal to be sad, but after five months, you know, we also

5:06have to realize that we have to kind of let go at times, you know, God will never subtract without multiplying, right? So he's going to give you something, um, I could say better, but more like something you need. And I understand breakups are tough, uh, having your heart broken is tough. It's very, very tough, actually, and a lot of people cope with it in different ways. Instead I would invite to not cope with it the way that you're used to and cope with it the way that we use him, right? Father God. I would struggle. Please help me. And I think the issue is, uh, we tend to idolize people, right? We tend to just replace God in a lot of ways, you know, and I know three years is a lot, a lot of time, but, you know, if you spend the next three years, even if you're single, working on your relationship with God, staying in these main stages and growing, I guarantee you, you will find a woman who will love you for you, you know, a lot of people love me for, for me, right? And love me for the gospel.

6:08And without it, I'm really nothing. I think I'm just very weak without the gospel. Even with the gospel, I'm very weak, you know, but I can flat out say that people care about me. They come to me because of the gospel. And so I, I would, I would stay in here. I would watch the salvation video. I would do everything to kind of grow in the gospel. And then this, this will allow you to, you know, move forward and truly grow, you know, like, I'm alone a lot of the times, but I don't feel alone. I used to not be able to be alone. I had to go around homies and friends and, you know, physically be around people. But although you're alone right now, physically, you are not alone spiritually. It's just a God on His truth, you know? So, you know, it says in the Bible, Seek ye first the kingdom of God, right? And all else will be added unto you. You know, Matthew 6, 33 speaks about this, right?

7:10Seek ye first the kingdom of God. All else will be added unto you. What does that actually mean, right? The kingdom of God is the gospel. What Jesus speaks about is the gospel, right? What the issue is, we don't think about it that deeply. We just think about other things that distract us from the gospel, right? And so, to seek the kingdom first is to seek the gospel first, because the gospel is the doorway. It's the foundation for God's kingdom. Jesus is the foundation without the gospel. Everything else is just in vain genuinely. So the gospel of Jesus Christ, right, has to be the lens that you, which you view everything. Does that make sense? Right? It's, it's, you have to, you know, it doesn't mean to ignore your career, it doesn't mean to ignore your relationships and your goals, right? It means that your career, your goals, your relationships, they're no longer about you. They have to be aligned with who?

8:11With Christ and what He's already done, amen, right? So like a house, for example, you can decorate a house all you want, but without a foundation, it's going to collapse, amen? So you can have a woman all you want, but if foundationally, you don't have a relationship with God, that will collapse, it's just how it is. It even happens when you have a foundation. So how much more so when you don't have a foundation? So God is saying, right, in Matthew 6, 33, seek ye first to kingdom of God and his righteousness and all else will be added unto you, his righteousness. So trust the gospel before you trust yourself or trust another person. It doesn't say her righteousness, your spouse's righteousness, your kids, no, his righteousness. Amen? So the gospel is very clear, you know? God's power is in this gospel. Romans 116 talks about the gospel of Christ. It is the power of God unto salvation. So in every conversation, you're supposed to point to grace, not preach every single thing, but point to grace. How God helped you, how God loves you, right?

9:15And that's kind of what it comes down to, right? Let this gospel lead every aspect of your life, basically. When Jesus comes first, everything else falls into place. That's the beautiful thing about the gospel. And that's why I'm so big on it. That's why I focus on it heavily, heavily, heavily. It's because there's nothing like I just showed you, showed with you guys, right? I just showed you guys like all this knowledge about, you know, the lambs blood and being anti-venom and Oven serum and all, but like none of that matters if Jesus is not at the center of it. So same thing in your relationship, none of that matters if Jesus isn't at the center of it. Do you guys understand what I'm saying? It doesn't like none of those things matter, right? You have to have Jesus at the center of everything, brothers and sisters. If you don't, then it just, it feels nice, you know, very temporary, all these little things. It's great. But the end of the day, not really, you know, it's not something you can actually like,

10:20how do I say, like draw from what you can draw from though is the gospel always, always genuinely. All right. My ex-wife and I did IVF in vitro fertilization. I was not a Christian then. She wants to destroy the embryos and I can't do that. So I'm paying to store them. I started dating someone new. Should I tell her? I'm embarrassed about my situation. It's out of sight, out of mind, usually, but it does weigh on me sometimes. I also feel like my new person should know about the embryos, but don't know when or how to tell her. Oh, that's tough. I mean, I don't really know stuff about that, right? You did this when you weren't a Christian. So I would say, like, that's okay, you know. I think, however, it's important to kind of, you know, I don't know. I understand you don't want to destroy the embryos. You believe it's life and you're taking responsibility and you're bearing the cost, you know, and that's good. That's good, you know. But, no, I think you can either tell her or not tell her, but you have to do it by

11:23faith. Not personally tell her, but I don't know if she, if she's ready to take it or not. That's up to you. I don't know her heart posture, right? And I don't think it's a secret. You have to hide that personally, I don't think so, right? It's not a secret because you did it before her. So you can just let her know, hey, just, just so you know, like, and maybe you guys can come together with the conclusion, right? So I would say that, but yeah, you know, you can tell her, you know, there's something important about my past. I want to share because I value honesty and I respect you. Before I came to faith, my ex-wife and I did in vitro, there are embryos that still exist, right? And I haven't, you know, I haven't destroyed them, but I kind of chose to store them. And I feel like destroying them would be wrong because it's like destroying a life, you know? I don't think it affects our day to day, but, you know, I just want you to know. And then let her respond. See what she has to say, you know, I mean, and believe that God will help you in all

12:25of those things. But that is something difficult, you know? But I think she will respect the honesty, or it can go the other way. But that also will be very revealing. You know, if you're honest to somebody and then they use it against you, that's proof that they're not your person respectfully, right? It's just kind of how it is, right? I mean, I've done it. I think we've all done it and it's, it's not a good feeling, but maybe they're just not mature enough or they trust their thoughts at that moment, but have a conversation with them and keep having the conversation until you can't have the conversation anymore. It's okay to talk about things multiple times. I talk about the gospel every single day to you guys and it never gets old. And sometimes it does. Sometimes you're like, dude, talk about something else, bro, like, she's, you know, right? So yeah, greetings, Pastor Johnny, sorry to hear you are sick again. We're praying for you. We'd help with my unbelief when it comes to healing. I've been in chronic pain for almost two decades and now my teenage daughter is experiencing similar symptoms. I want to believe we are healed through the word, but I am struggling and you please provide

13:26some guidance. If nothing else, I just want enough belief for my daughter to experience healing. I think you have to cling on to Isaiah 4031. Obviously, do the things that you need to do to heal 100% that's important. But you also have to believe in God. You have to believe, Lord, you will help me. You know, even though it's been, you know, 20 years, you receive salvation and I think God will help you, but you have to believe in that. And you have to ask God the same way you're asking to help with my, Lord, I believe help my unbelief. Satan tries to tell me that even after 20 years, you're not going to help me. But Lord, you let Jesus wait 30 years to step into ministry. You allow Joseph and Jacob in them to wait 20 years for X, Y and Z, like how much more so me, you love me. I know you do, or please help me, you know, and in this way, you can also, and also your child is not your child, it's God's child. So you can also ask him about that too.

14:28When you ask sincerely, don't expect anything, just tell him, share your heart with him. Like you share it here, share it with him. And you know, cry if you have to get frustrated if you have to get angry, it's okay, but just talk to him, right? Hearing you makes me realize I was lied to about almost all of what I believe to be truth for a really long time. Thank you so much. Amen. Sure. Same. I was lied to too. Not just by theology, but by the world, you know, it's crazy, right? How do I set boundaries with people with God, boundaries with people with God? What do you mean by that? Setting boundaries in a godly way with people? If that's the case, then you have to use the gospel and you have to let them know, hey, I'm here for you, but I also have a life that I serve God and don't do it in a legalistic way. Be like, I'm here for you, but I just can't do certain things that are worldly or like kind of are against me. And I hope you can respect that. And if they really do respect you, they'll respect you.

15:29If they don't, they'll guilt trip you. And you know, just what it is, right? Amen. Wow. Why have we asked our contractor we found on Angie.com to be our kids legal guardian? Because he took such good care when redoing our basement that we knew we could trust him to care for our kids. Ballade of them. Should something happen to us? Are you my dad now? No. Sorry. I do basement. Connecting homeowners with skilled pros for over 30 years, Angie, though when you trust to find the ones you trust, find pros for all your home projects at Angie.com. Why have I asked my age back guy I found on Angie.com to change my grandpa's trachea tube? Because I was so amazed by how quickly he replaced our air ducts. I knew I could trust him to change pop-ups too while I was on vacation. Make a quick young man. Aw, see? Pop-up trusts you. Uh, I think we should call it doctor. Connecting homeowners with skilled pros for over 30 years.

16:30Angie, though when you trust to find the ones you trust, find pros for all your home projects at Angie.com. Hey, if you're enjoying this episode, I have a whole other video episode on all platforms you to Spotify, Instagram, all that every single Monday. Each episode is a gospel centered lesson that you could apply to your life today. So this is more conversational. You guys know my team, Jeremy and Aaron. We just have a lot of fun. We joke around, but we get serious. We get vulnerable. It's just very, very different and it's beautiful. I hope you guys can tune in. We made this for you guys, so please enjoy. Why the Jehovah's Witnesses are so stuck on the God's only name, huh? I think it's because they don't have the gospel. When you don't have the gospel, you get stuck and caught up in other things, right? They think they have the gospel. I would say that they don't. A lot of the theology is very, very questionable, right? And so their whole theological system is built on this idea that using this name,

17:35Jehovah, right, is going to distinguish them from false Christianity because they think that they're above, right? They, I mean, it makes sense. If you use God's personal name, then you know him. If you don't know his personal name, then you can't, you don't know him. Like if you're just like that guy, you know, like, like, my name is Johnny, right? You don't dress me as Johnny. You wouldn't be like that guy. Oh, that tick-tock influencer. That means you don't know me like that. So the issue here is that they think it's like identity or authority, right? And Jehovah is Jehovah, right, which is Yahweh, it comes from, you know, the name, right? And so Yahovah is basically Adonai, it's basically a God's full name, right, I understand. But actually, even Yahovah is not as close as Yahweh, Yahweh is closer, right? But again, this is why I think it's an issue because they don't have the gospel.

18:39So they're stuck on one thing, you know, the Bible says God has multiple names, Elohim El Shaddai, Adonai, Yahweh, Father King, Shepherd, Lord. I mean, you know, Elgidor, right? I mean, right, Kirios, right? And I mean, there's just so many names for him. So if they're like, oh, yeah, this is, you know, the only, and that's, that's the issue. They're, they're trying to flex superiority and authority essentially. That's the issue here. And so that's, that's what it is, you know, I think that's why they, like I said, though, it comes down to because you, they don't have the gospel, you know, right? My thoughts have been heavy lately, back to back. I've been getting triggers that are dragging me back to my past. Yeah. So you have to go to the word Isaiah 43, 16 to 19, read that carefully. We are new creatures, but trick, things with trigger, things triggered me too.

19:41You know, a lot of things trigger me. Um, you know, people are supposed to do a church in the Bay Area. And they were just like, hey, respectfully, we, we can't, you know, we, uh, don't agree with your doctrine. You know, we don't agree with certain Reddit posts and we don't agree with certain things that we've seen. And, you know, you said the Lord's prayers, and I'm just like, dang, like people can't see that I'm bringing them to their church so that they can even nurture them, right? Because like, when you look at even pastor Israel church and victory outreach, when you look at Whittier, you look at Phoenix, you know, uh, they, they literally stay over there a lot of people, right? And so it's so weird when people are like, we got to protect the sheep, but they come, they become, they become, like, invest, like, investigative, right? They're just very like, we got to investigate these things. And it's like, cool, that's fine.

20:42But what does that have to do with anything about what I'm preaching about right now? Right? It's like, they don't, they don't want to see above that, you know? Like when I seen the James Sexton podcast, you know, he was being vulnerable and he was like, yeah, I'm a heathen, like he straight up said it, like I've done many things and he's probably partied a lot and, you know, did a lot of stuff. And he's super like being honest and then he's like, no one will love me for who I am. And he lets out just that little bit of honesty and people are grilling them in the comments. Oh, this guy discusses me. He talks about the deity of Christ. Don't you disrespect my Messiah and I'm just like, dude, like context, man. Read the room, you know? So people, they get triggered. I get triggered. We all get triggered, but we have to make a decision when God closes one door. He opens up another. You know, the Bible is really scary about one thing.

21:43It says, I will bless those who bless you and curse those who curse you. God's not playing about that. He's talking to believers like me and you, you know, people become almost like legalistic and investigative and, you know, and just they start to like do these things of like, we need to see the truth and it's like, sure, you know, you should seek truth. And at the end of the day, shouldn't you also be seeking the word of God more than anything? Why didn't you ask me for my statement of faith? Why didn't you ask to have a conversation? Why is it that my past is being brought up? You know? And it's like it doesn't make sense, you know? And people like I have never once genuinely went on any of these online forums or even like places where you can share your heart aside from like gospel center places and found any peace in that. Like those chat rooms and back in the day, there was like those party lines, like, you know, in my era, like that it was just a bunch of trolls in a room who just like fueled

22:48each other's hatred. Like I genuinely have never, ever seen anything, right? Like good come out of these things, right? Our job is to preach the gospel brothers and sisters. Regardless of what your past is, regardless of what your present is, God says seek ye the kingdom and all else will be added. So let's say you guys struggle with addiction. What can you actively do about your addiction? When you preach the gospel, God says all else will be added meaning I'll fix it for you. Just keep going and it's so true. I experienced this even in my own life. I think you guys have too. But the problem is triggers always come. Pastor John and Pastor Kim I had fellowship with them and they said don't get caught up in that stuff. And focus on spiritual life, even when people are focused on your spiritual life, shish. That was such a bar. You know, people who focus on other people's spiritual lives have nothing to show in their spiritual life. That's why they're just self-righteous.

23:50He said respectfully, is that church doing any works that you're doing? You know, their congregation is not that big. And respectfully, you know, they're not really like pushing it out there, but they're so like, look at me, you know, we're righteous and it's like we're good people. And at the end of the day, guys, it's all just really like pitiful things, you know. It was very, very sad. And so, you know, I just, I understand the triggers, you know, it happens every single day. God is showing me too, Johnny, like I will show you people who mess with you for real and I will show you people who don't, you know, you don't have to worry about anything. Just move forward. That's all you got to do, you know. Amen. So yeah, guys, daily devotionals are back. Every morning, I send a devotional that I personally write rooted in scripture to help you with your spiritual walk with God and to make the gospel a habit in your life. There's nothing more powerful than starting your day with his word. Join over 100,000 others for your free daily devotional.

24:52Sign up with your email using the link in the description. My hopes to help you guys grow with your spiritual life each and every day. If you're tackling a home project, check out Angie.com from roofing to remodels and everything in between Angie connects you with skilled pros who do such a good job. You might trust them to do other things like pull out your tooth or wear kids Godfather. Well, don't ask them to do these things. Just let them get the job done well. Angie, the one you trust to find the ones you trust, find a pro for your projects at Angie.com. That's a-n-g-i.com. Why have I asked my electrician I found on Angie.com to bury my pet hamster nibbles in our yard for me? Because I was so moved by how carefully he buried my electrical wires. I knew I could trust him to bury my sweet nibbles after his untimely end. Huh, nibbles gone too soon. May he scurry in peace. They say about your pet, but I just wire stuff. Nibbles would have loved you like a brother. Connecting homeowners with skilled pros were over 30 years. Angie, the one you trust to find the ones you trust.

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26:56Pastor, I'm so thankful that our fellowship for our fellowship last Saturday that really pulled me out of so much darkness. I spoke to Pastor shared my true heart since then. It's almost like the gospel has grown so much more in my heart. Honestly, thank you. Yeah, just be honest with him. You know, like I said, just share your heart. And even if you didn't share it with him, I was saying share it with God. I don't share everything with Pastor. I share a lot of things I do, but not every single thing. You know? And so it's just how it is, you know? All right, share your heart with God. Johnny, I'm about to get off probation on Sunday, congrats. And I'm getting thoughts after negative thoughts about using. I don't want to fall back to my old ways. Yeah, that's why you have to go to church. You have to find something to occupy your time. Because genuinely, it's not easy. It's not easy, you know? Like I get it, man, I get it. I'm the same. Like I would be a dog without church genuinely. I'm a dog with church, you know?

27:57It's just the truth. Like I'm evil when it comes to, you know, those types of things too. So I get you. We kind of just have like a high, like good people who don't have lots of trauma. And like it's easy for them to be like, oh, I don't struggle with this. I don't struggle with that. Like that's easy. You know, I'm not saying no one struggles. I think everyone's struggle is relative, okay? But when you have like a tremendous amount of trauma, and I'm not saying subjectively, like not in your eyes, but like you know you have trauma when you don't even feel like it's trauma anymore. Like if you can still feel wronged, I would say that's not really trauma, right? Like hear me out, guys, right? When you're sitting there and you're like, I was wrong. Like trauma becomes your reality. Do you guys understand what I'm saying? It keeps you stuck in flight, like fighter flight. Trauma's not just like, oh, he hurt my feelings, right?

28:59So I would say like, like I know a person who was sexually assaulted and she was a lady. And she was numb to everything because of it. She didn't have time to get mad at people and hate men. She didn't have, she was just like, I don't know why I just keep running away from relationships. Like her body would just react. Like she would find the best man who would, she was, you know, a very good looking person and she was, she was conventionally attractive. And she would find the best man who would want to take, and these are good men. And she would just leave them. I, I'm okay. And then we unpacked that she would run away when things got good because the trauma bled into her life that only bad things are supposed to happen. And it's uncomfortable for her when things are good. That's real trauma. Understand? She was abused by her uncle for years from seven to like, I think 17 or some crazy stuff. Right? It was wild for like 10 years straight. She was abused. And in her heart, she was just like, this was our conversation.

30:01So do you feel, no, I actually don't feel, and to be honest, I think I enjoyed it. Like, I mean, I did it until I was 17. So I actually kind of, I mean, it's incestial, but like, I, I liked it though. Low key. That's trauma, brothers and sisters. That's, it, you don't, you, you feel nothing towards it anymore. Do you understand what I'm saying? Right? It's same thing. Like, I got to a point where I was like, I mean, I don't care either. And then I'm like, wait, you're supposed to get mad. Like, for example, guys, when I look at Jeremy, I realize how traumatized I am. You know, I'm not saying Jeremy didn't go through a lot of trauma. He did. But he'll ask me questions or, or will like see a movie or some and, you know, or I'll, I'll detail something, you know, and he'll be like, oh, bro, don't talk about that. Like stabbing someone, oh, like the blood, oh, bro, I'm about to throw up. Like, that's the difference where I'm just like, oh, yeah, no, it's fine. Guys, I've seen people shot with their brains hanging out, genuinely, and it doesn't

31:02do anything to me. I think that's trauma. I don't think a normal person would be like, oh, yeah, okay, like a normal person would be like, oh, my god, they're like scream, but I've never screamed genuinely. I've never, oh, my god, whoa, like I've never done that. To me, I've seen people get stabbed in front of me. I've seen people get stomped out. I've seen like, it doesn't, I don't react and very desensitized to it. So I would say that's trauma. I'm not saying you guys don't. I think there's levels of trauma, absolutely. But if you're completely disassociated, I think that's the highest level. You know what I mean? And so, you know, I've learned too that like it's, it's like if you complain and you're focused on those things, like I would say you're not traumatized enough. Like I think you're just complainful and feel wronged. There's a difference of trauma and being wronged, okay? And two of them kind of go hand in hand, yes. Because every person that was traumatized is wronged.

32:03But not every wrong person is traumatized. That's the truth. I've noticed that, right? And so, you know, I, yeah, I think like it's just different, you know? So do I struggle with a lot of things because of my trauma, absolutely. Like I, I'll be talking and I'll be like, huh, I'll be talking about some gruesome things. And Aaron and Jeremy will literally be like, dude, what? That's psychopathic. And I'm like, yeah, I know it's kind of crazy, huh? So, they just look at me like, whoa, dude, like, you know, and so I think, I think, you know, we don't have to be frustrated about other people and, you know, things like we just have to realize, like how to mark if you have real trauma and these real triggers is that even when the triggers come, you just like sit in it, you just fall back, you know? So pastor was also explaining that although you feel numb to these certain things, Johnny, you're still righteous and perfected.

33:05I hope you believe that and I was like, huh, amen. You know, don't focus on anything too crazy, and I want to share that with you guys. You know, don't focus on anything crazy, brothers and sisters in your life, rather just focus on the gospel. You know, don't focus on how people did you dirty, don't focus on, like, you'll sit there and you will die to that. I'm not lying. You will die. You will literally be so caught up in BS all the time that you just, you will not be able to grow at all, you know? You'll literally sit there and just, and it's, it's crazy, you know? And you can't say that all of your things are like, I was talking about this earlier, right? Like, for example, people are like, like, the biggest unlock in life, guys, that I can give you is to step out of the realm of your own thoughts, that even though what seems right in your eyes may not actually be right, and I'll explain, I'll explain,

34:07right? So, you know, if you want to be happy, you have to learn to think outside of the box of your brain, because people don't realize your brain can be, can either free you or it can, it can, it can keep you in bondage, it can imprison you, okay? It's genuinely how, you guys know exactly what I'm talking about, but let me explain deeper. When you look at the company 3M, right, you guys have heard of this company 3M. It has the famous 3M and it's, you could peel the thing back, it makes adhesives where you can do a coat hanger or, you know, hang up certain things, they make like tape and adhesive for people, right? It's very big. And so the person, right, Art Fry, he was a scientist and he worked for them and he made office supplies, but before they even made office supplies, they were an adhesive glue company, did you know that? They just made glues.

35:07And so they wanted to make the strong glue, stronger than super glue, at that time super glue was obviously had the, you know, had the juice. So they were creating this and they kept failing. So circumstantially, in the circumstances, right, shouldn't they have quit? Yes, because they're like, look, we made this thing, we're pouring all of our research into it, we're pouring all of our money into it and we don't, and this thing is like not sticky at all, it's not strong as super glue, it's just not working. And so Art, he's a believer, so he goes to church one day and he's singing his notes and all of a sudden, you know, his bookmark keeps flying out like when he's singing and he's like, dude, if I could just have something like this bookmark stick here and if I had like multiple bookmarks is sometimes I want to sing here and then I want to go to this Bible verse, right? That idea came to him. And then it opened his mind instead of thinking, dang, we failed, we failed.

36:08He created a solution to a problem that he didn't even know he had. So he didn't give up, he stepped out of his mindset, but imagine if he didn't, imagine if he was like, my, my own desire and my mindset is I want to be the greatest crazy glue company. Then he would have been limited to that. Do you understand? 3M got big because of the postage. So that little glue that they deemed a failure in their eyes circumstantially to was actually their greatest success. But they had to step out of their mindset to in order to obtain this. Are you guys following me here in the same way, right? In the same way, you may think like all these things happening to you and that happened to you is bad and trauma and he's wrong, she's wrong, he shouldn't do that, she should like, you may have this energy, okay, which is fine, you're allowed that.

37:10But if you learn to step out of that mindset, you will grow. You know me too, like I was molested by a woman and I think it got to the point where I didn't care about, like I had that trauma where I didn't care. I was 12 years old, I was roofied and the woman was 17, right? And she died shortly after, right? And I never really had like vengeance or I never really had like, I felt like my innocence was tampered with. I felt like I had no control of my life. And from then on, I just wanted to control my life. So my view on women, I think at that time was completely tainted at the age of 12. I was like, these girls are just here to do this to me. And if that's the case and I have to do that to them and right, there's like this trauma that builds. And so I used to always like, I got saved and I used to always wonder why God allowed that to happen to me, right? That was the one thing that I didn't want to share with anybody because that's like

38:12embarrassing, right? To say that you got molested and then found yourself like next to a dumpster with your pants by your ankles and like, you know what I mean? It's like weird to say stuff like that to people. And so I couldn't understand why God allowed that. Even after being saved, I was actually more questioning, right? Like what the hell, dude? And I thought in my own frame of mine that that only happens to me. Like I knew women would get sexually assaulted. I didn't think men did. I just don't know why. I just, it just was that thing where it's like, you don't hear about that often. Understand what I'm saying, right? You don't hear about that genuinely. And so I'm like, okay, I'm going to keep this a secret and I'm just going to keep pushing it, right? But then God, right? He showed me something one day. And it was only recently that I figured out why I needed to go through what I went through. So my frame, my thought, my logic was, yo, why did I need to get assaulted sexually?

39:15Like of all things, where's the lesson in this? My, you guys ever feel like that? Where the hell is a lesson in all of this, right? And then one day, this was only recently, like three years ago, right, two, two years ago, two and a half years ago. I started offering like one-on-one mentorships, do you understand? And I started to notice a pattern, not just with women, but with men too. That most people, like 70 to 80% of people that I spoke to were in some way, shape or form victims of sexual assault. And then it clicked. Because when they spoke about it, it was a lady who spoke about this to me. I opened up and said, wow, I know exactly how you feel. And she kind of looked at me like, what? And I even said in, because at that moment, my brain unlocked and I was like, oh, that's why I had to go through this because I can relate to you.

40:15And then she started crying and you know, it was like, oh my gosh, that's so true, right? And so thank you, Matthew. And so that, like, how long did it take, though, from 12 to 24 and then from 24 to just recently, 33, right, if from 12 to 23, that's 21 years, right, if my math serves me, right? It took for me to go, oh, that's what it was, understand what I'm saying. And so I had to also step out of my mindset, but let's say I didn't, let's say if I was like, no, sister, they're freaking wrong, they're evil, they're like, I could do that. But do you think it would have freed that woman from her trauma? I don't think so. I think the relatability allowed her to go, wow, Johnny, like, I don't feel so alone. I get it, you know, and I understand that you understand. And even from a mat, because I hated men, she said, because of that, I hated men. And all my relationships failed because I always would just be like, if you touch me in

41:18a certain way, like, you triggered me to think about the man that did that to me. But then here you are preaching the gospel and like, you're going through it. It gives me hope that I can heal too. Because if you got healed, it doesn't just happen to women. And for the longest time I thought it did. And I'm like, for the longest time I thought it did too. Like genuinely, I thought it only happened to, but I've heard aunties and babysitters, like girls who are doing that to men too, right? I didn't know that. I genuinely didn't know. I thought I was an anomaly. I was like, what the hell? And yeah, you know, the Sagittory, you know, stuff, and I'm like, dude, this is crazy. And so from that, I was able to kind of like piece that in my heart and go, whoa, God, like I wasn't looking for the piece. I wasn't even looking for the answer. And yet you kind of showed me what it was, you know? And so it was really cool. And then I started to talk about it more because I'm like, huh, maybe this will actually

42:21relate to. And then when I did that, then you guys also were like, oh, it makes sense. Like I also went through that. Oh, he gets it, you know? Like to feel robbed of something is not a, like I've already, like I feel like my whole life, I've been robbed. I've been robbed of my freedom. I've been robbed of my, you know, my innocence. I've been robbed of my, my right to a peaceful family. So robbed of my peace, robbed of my childhood, robbed of my adulthood event. Like it's just a lot. And so I wanted control of something and I, and the only thing I would do was we cope with women, right? And there's times where we, we, we slip back into that, right? Transparently speaking, of course. But people don't understand that, like, you know what I mean, right? So, you know, I always use this example, but like also people who are true sinners don't condemn others for sinning. Do you know why? Because if they did that, they would, it, that would, that doesn't make sense. Like, like a woman that, that I know was, was raped and she could just tell by looking

43:27at someone else that they were raped. Like I could tell if someone has a, a checkered pass, especially a gang member, because I lived it, right? So in the same way, like a person who's been assaulted can see how another woman copes and figures it out herself to how they self sued and right, they understand too. So I've never, like the only women that judge other women who are sexually assaulted is women who haven't been, do you understand what I'm saying, right? And or they don't think that their trauma is trauma because when they see how someone reacts, then they can only have compassion. Why? Because they understand. So a sinner who judges other people for sinning differently is not a true sinner. Yes, they say that they're sinners, but in their heart, they're not. Does this make sense? Brothers and sisters, what I'm saying? They could say I'm a sinner. I'm a sinner. But like I could say I'm a, I'm a gang member. I'm a gang member. I understand.

44:28I emphasize. But guys, you guys need to stop carrying guns. Like, what do you mean? I carry the gun. I would be a hypocrite. Do you understand what I'm saying? Oh, you guys need to stop doing drugs. What do you talk about? I did drugs. Right? So anyone who sits there and judges you, I'm going to be honest. They can only judge because they think they're better than you. And you only judge because you think you're better than them. Are you guys understanding what I'm saying? That's the only reason why you can't because you're not living like them. But just because you're not living like them, guys, count it all as grace, God says. Do you understand? You have grace and mercy not to live like that, right? You have grace and mercy not to be diagnosed, you know, bipolar or narcissistic. You're not better than them. Narcissistic people. I've met real ones who were NPT. They hate being the way that they are actually. And that's biblical, right? It's, I've seen it firsthand. It's a real disorder.

45:29People throw it around narcissism, narcissism. He's a class A narcissist. It's like, but you're not a psychologist. Neither are you a pathologist like you don't know what that is, right? When I see them and I deal with them, like in prison, there are people who have a lot of mental illnesses and they are diagnosed, narcissistic, schizophrenic, bipolar, NPT, right? BPD, all these different disorders. They never want to be that way. When I see them, my heart cracks. Because I'm like, dang, they don't want to be this way. There's either chemical imbalances in their brain or something that happens so bad that this is, they're permanently, it's almost like a on switch. They're permanently stuck on that mode. And many of us are like that too. Maybe not with depression and loneliness, but with sin. So what makes us better? That's why, guys, if any of you guys, I ask any of you guys to, if you want to be humble, to truly serve people in the worst places. Go to prisons and meet with people.

46:31Go to Africa, go to places with Brazil, third world countries that literally have nothing and struggle with them for a little bit. And you will see that you have so many things to be thankful about. You will see, dang, I'm not even like tripping that much. And everything becomes so, so much smaller. Like when I went to Liberia, Africa, I hated my pastor so much. I hated everyone for sending me there. But later I started to realize something, dang, I'm spoiled, man. My problems are not problems compared to these people, you know, right? My problems are not these children have nothing, literal nothing. They have to hike for their water. They have to work multiple hours a day to make like pennies on the dollar. Like, it's horrible, understand? It's horrible, man. Honestly, it's horrible. They're living conditions and yet they're happier than me and you.

47:34You know, in Liberia, Africa, just like Pastor John said, he's not lying. He said, I learned to be thankful. That was wild when he said, I'm like, that's facts, but you can't explain this to people. They have to go through it. I'll understand what I'm saying, right? I can't explain that to you guys. I don't know how to explain it, you know, as much as you have to kind of be like, oh, this is what it means. So guys, I'm very thankful. Count everything a blessing, sad and good, right? But people are so stuck in their self-righteousness and in their judgment. Guys, that's what's going to kill you. Do you understand what I'm saying? That's what's going to kill you. Is if you're right, then that means Pastor Kim has a famous line. If you're right, that means God has to be wrong. What he's taught me through these years and I still struggle with is when you are wrong, that's when you're right. Because that's when God helps you.

48:34Being wrong is being right, you know? So whatever people have done to me, like I released that woman to, you know, in my heart. And whatever people have done to you guys, if you want to be happy, you have to learn to release it. Today, I hope you guys can release that, you know? Because we don't forgive people because they deserve it. We forgive people because we deserve it. You're giving me? Right? Amen. We deserve to be freed. Right? So move on, whether it's a person like your family member who hurt you, I'm sorry, but they were also hurt by somebody and say, and I'm not excusing their behavior, please, please, don't take this the wrong way. But I'm saying that's why God was nailed to the cross, even for that person. And that's why God was nailed to the cross, even for me. Because I heard a lot of people, I heard so many people inadvertently, intentionally I know. I know I do. Like I have to stand in front of God, you know, always.

49:34And so what I've learned though is like, yeah, I'm wrong, God, you have to help me. And then nothing becomes a problem after that. Nothing becomes a problem, but it's actually really amazing. You get freed from it and you move forward. Amen. All right, guys, all right, I got to go. See you guys later. Bye. Monster Energy. Everybody knows white monster, zero ultra. That's the OG. It kicked off this whole zero sugar energy drink thing. But ultra is a whole lineup now. You've got strawberry dreams, blue Hawaiian, sunrise, and vice guava. And they all bring the monster energy punch. So if you've been living in the white can, branch out. Ultra's got a flavor for every vibe. And every single one is zero sugar. Tap the banner to learn more. Avocromby's active brand, your personal best, is designed for every part of your workout routine. Their best selling leggings and sports bras are so buttery soft. Perfect for Pilates and Yoka days.

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