Why Did You Have to GTFO and GHOST Your Previous Life?

0:00Why did you have to GCFO and ghost your previous life? I grew up in a small town with two best friends. The three of us were extremely tight from elementary school through our early 20s, with a brief enslude when I left for college. But this completely fell apart about 11 years ago. One of my friends was engaged to a real psychopath that likes to toy with her, and that relationship made her mean-spirited, insecure, and paranoid as all hell. He came over one Sunday to fix my old snowblower, which I was planning to sell since I recently moved to an apartment. I offered him a beer, and he took that as an opening and tried to kiss me and put his hands on me. I turned him down pretty harshly, but I decided not to tell my friend who was pregnant at the time and easily upset. Well, he was pretty mad about that, turned around and told her that I tried to seduce him. Long story short, she believed him. She went into an emotional tailspin, destroyed some stuff, and burned a lot of bridges. My other friend decided no smoke without fire, and believed him as well.

1:02Word got around my small hometown pretty quickly, and it felt like everyone turned on me in a heartbeat. After all, my two best lifelong friends believed I'd try to seduce one's fiancee and caused her to destroy her life, and it was deemed weird that I'd invited him over to fix my snowblower in the summer, even though it was because I'd moved into an apartment. Even the people who were kind on the fence about who to believe stayed the hell away from me. It didn't matter that he'd always been a butthole and a player, and their relationship and her emotional state had been on the rocks for ages, and I was ashamed too. I wondered if I'd let him on in some way. I was devastated from my friend, and I couldn't hold my head up. I started avoiding people. For two years, I was either angry or depressed all the time. I stopped going out, I lost about 30 pounds, and I was only 130 to start with. I cried all the time. It never occurred to me to seek therapy. I also never seriously considered standing up for myself, confronting him publicly, laying it all out in the open in one big blow-up. I finally got out because a college friend of mine happened to be road-tripping across

2:03country, paid me a visit, and was shocked at how much I changed. He convinced me to go with him, and I did. Turns out the only good thing about having depression and never going out to socialise for almost two years, except for work, was that I had a healthy savings account. It's amazing how little you spend when you stop trying to keep up appearances for others. I told my landlord I was leaving the next day, paid another two months and left the deposit in exchange for him getting rid of my stuff, and having the apartment cleaned. I packed my bags and just left with my friend. That road trip helped remind me there was a much bigger and brighter world out there than my crappy little town and all the drama left behind. At the end of it, I crashed at his home for three months before I got back on my feet, got my own place, and got a steady job. I was really lucky with the latter. It was the height of the recession and the job market was rough. He and I stayed friends for two more years before we started dating. We've been married an hour for six. Four or five years into my new life, I reached out to my other friend, not the one who's partner racked everything. I did this in part for closure and part if we're honest due to morbid curiosity.

3:05But she didn't want to talk. More than a decade of friendship and she still didn't want to just hear me out. It was really at that moment that I was able to truly leave things behind. It seems surreal, but I rarely think of that part of my life anymore. My memories of that time aren't all that sharp. Those two years were a blur. Sometimes I wonder what happens to them. If my former friend came out of it all okay and got away from that guy, but it doesn't keep me up at night. I look at my life now and I'm a happy person, stable, content in my life, and secure. I can honestly say now that the whole thing hasn't left any lasting trauma on me, except that I doubt I'll ever let myself have friendships that went that deep and hurt that much. I have a lot of friends, a few that are closer than others, but none's super close, except my husband of course, and I don't really miss it all that much. Two years of that, I guess it's hard to move on when you're hoping that what had been your entire social life might come back, but I think I would have already moved elsewhere if things were really that bad for that long. But it sounds like when you did get out, it was eventually a completely worthwhile move, so congratulations on that.

4:08I bailed because I wanted to escape family drama, and I did. Life is still full and rich with incident, but I no longer have to hear family members boast, lie, rage, and try to pull me into it all. Ah, peace. I was cheated on when I lived on the East Coast, so this year I packed up my crap and drove 1600 miles to a city I've really liked for years and I'm starting over now. It's been three weeks and I've not regretted it, even though I don't know anyone here, I'm meeting new people all the time that are nicer than most anyone I knew before. I worked at a medical green herb dispensary in the LA area for six years. One day I got raided, so that life abruptly came to an end. I had to figure out what my next move was, so I packed all of my stuff into a storage locker and got on a greyhound bus to Arizona. My mum moved to Phoenix a couple of years prior, so I had a place to stay just no clue what I was going to do. Now I work doing inventory management and web design for a small business. I also got back into school, so I'm one semester away from transferring to ASU.

5:08I'm 27, but I finally made it to university. After all that time smoking green herb and being the cool guy, it's very humbling to be in a town where you don't know anyone. I got tired of working 65 hours a week at night, even though I was making 75k a year, it was salary and came out after taxes as 1620 an hour. I bought a van, got a geared out, and I'm starting a job as a white water rafting guide in May. I don't know how it'll work out yet, but it sounds like fun. I had an extremely high-paying job in the UK, but was working ridiculous hours when I was in the UK, and would frequently get late-night calls that I needed to be in some random country the next day for an unspecified amount of time. I had a lot of cash built up, but no social life or friends, because I just couldn't maintain them with the way I was working. As a child, my parents had decided to foster two brothers so that I wouldn't grow up as an only child. However, the kids they ended up fostering were clinical psychopaths, formerly diagnosed, and then ended up in long-term secure care. One of them escaped whilst on a day trip,

6:09and went to the police, claiming to be me, and spinning a tale about how my father had been mistreating me. Without checking the story, the police arrested my dad and one of them decided to tell the neighbours what was going on. By the time I found out and got it sorted, the story had spread around the neighbourhood and kept growing with the retelling. Eventually, my dad moved back to Barbados, which has a US-style healthcare system. Before his private healthcare could kick in, he came down sick and blew through all his savings on medical care. I stepped in and also started blowing through my savings, paying for his treatment and upgrading his home to be able to support him in a wheelchair. He eventually died from complications of the treatments, and I flew out to Barbados for the last time for his funeral. He had left very strict instructions for his funeral, no fancy coffin, cremation, and remains to return to the UK to be interred alongside my mother. However, his family thought differently and kept hounding his partner trying to get a ridiculously gaudy funeral. We eventually compromised and had his ashes interred in the family plot, but even then, at the ceremony, I had members of the family coming up to me and telling me

7:10that other family members, or even his partner, were trying to steal all of his money. When I got back to the UK, the whole thing was finally too much for me, so I quit my job and eventually moved to Australia, where I work in a much lower paying job, but don't have any of the stress or workload, but I can step out of my office, get on a tram and go down to the beach at any time. Only one person connected to my family knows where I am, and even they don't know enough to find me without hiring a PA, and knowing that I'm 36 hours of travel time away from a lot of them is quite reassuring. Just moved halfway across the country after leaving a toxic relationship with a woman I'm convinced would keep trying to f with my life. I've got some savings and a place to stay, but the uncertainty is real, man. I feel happier than I've ever been. The world is at my fingertips right now, time will tell if I'm a success story. I left because I was the blank sheep. I'm the middle child of five, and to my parents, the other four siblings were more successful, perfect, smart, and just plain better than me. When I met my successful spouse, they called me a gold digger, but at the same time they were

8:13glad I was apparently his problem now. I don't even know what I did, really. I just drew the short straw on kids whose parents can deal with them, I guess. I think my parents only had kids for show, so when the teen hormones made it a bit more of a handful in my siblings, they couldn't deal with me and wrote me off. Spouse had his own issues with his family, so 20 years ago we moved to another country, barely even said goodbye. We're wildly successful now with teen kids of our own, even hormonal difficult ones, and guess what, pops? We still love them to death. My family back home have been through divorces and miseries since then, but not us. We're doing well. We're still in love, life is great, truly the best revenge is living well. You can submit your own stories to be featured here on the channel. The story submission link is in the description below, and if you want to listen to some viby music in the background, check out Easy Mode, also link to below, and subscribe. Born and raised in my hometown in Central Florida, about 19 years old and became addicted to

9:15other things. About 6 years of that life and doing whatever I could to not slip into withdrawals, I decided to move as far away as I could from any of my dealers and all of my friends. With my mother's help, God bless her soul. First couple of months were terrible dealing with withdrawals and the depression that comes with it, but once I finally got past that slope, I was able to finally hold down a job and become an average person. It's been about two years since I left home, and now I'm rebuilding my credit. 650, baby. I got myself a girlfriend who's pretty neat, I got myself a pup that I love more than anything in the world, and overall just became a straight up normal person, and I'm extremely happy where I am in life now. I never thought I'd be on this side of addiction and just being able to type this is crazy to me. Honestly, it's so impressive that you were able to get over your addiction that way, although it's a decision that should be taken with a degree of research, folks, withdrawals can kill. Use helplines and, like this person, relatives or dear ones who want the best for you and are prepared to put up with your cramp while it happens. Came here to say that if your parents treat you like dirt, don't wait around for them to change,

10:19because they won't. Don't waste a minute of your life hoping they can fix what they broken you. I left home when I was 16, but I maintained contact with my mother, always thinking that she had changed. If I could do it over again, hard to walk out and never contact her again, I'm much happier not being in contact with her. I wish I'd done it sooner. Same. The best decision I ever made was to finally move out of my hometown when I was 24. One of my more regrettable decisions was to wait until then. Oh, and I'm also very happy to have cut out my parents. Haven't spoken to my dad in three years, I blocked my enabling mom on Facebook last month. Muting that voice that tells you your total dog cramp is such a relief. I left town because I was being hounded nice and day by an ex-boss. She didn't like that I had to go on medical leave to address an issue, so she called everyone in our field and told them she'd found me in bed with her husband. I ended up switching fields and going back to school. I pursued a legal action against her and once I graduated school and started looking for a job, I found she'd still blacklisted me at several

11:20agencies. I booked a U-Haul, packed up everything I owned and drove my cash and die halfway across the country. I'm pretty successful out here, I have a great paying job, two wonderful children, my own house, and a minimal relationships with other people. When I was 22 years old, I ghosted my PhD program. I went straight from undergrad to PhD in computer science at Georgia Tech. I had great grades and test scores, but I really had no idea what I wanted to do. Before my departure, I had a 4.0 GPA and a research assistantship, and I was absolutely miserable. Overworked, struggling to make ends meet, clueless on what I wanted to do, no free time whatsoever, just miserable. Then one day in database theory class, I read a letter from my friend about how if I was really unhappy just to stop, just get up wherever I was and leave, just do it. So I did. I got up in the middle of database theory class, walked to the door of the classroom, I dropped the textbook written by the professor who I thought was a pretty big jerk into the trash can with a resounding thought,

12:23and just left. Clued out my cubicle, drove to my apartment, got a crappy second shift job so I could go job hunting in the mornings, told nobody, sent no emails, called no one, returned no calls, and explained nothing. I've not been back to that campus in 25 years. I was in bad shape at the time with depression and general anxiety and severe anemia, all without knowing it. But I did make it through. It took about a month to find a great job that I've been at for the past 25 years. Though it took many years and a trip to the ER, I eventually got my depression, general anxiety and anemia all addressed. It's still a balancing act. I still need help sometimes, but it's generally good. Work paid for me to get my master's degree. I like my job pretty well, and I like my co-workers and immediate management. All in all, though it seemed like my life was falling apart at the time, it was honestly one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. I live in a very toxic household full of thieves and manipulators, planning to get away soon. Finished my service in the Peace Corps, went home for a few days to the East Coast,

13:25then got in my car with my dog, who I rescued and raised during my Peace Corps service, and bought home with me. Also, the few belongings I had, and then we just drove across country to the Midwest to a town where I knew nobody. I stayed at a random super-atem hotel because I was broke and to no other places would allow dogs while I looked for my own place. Felt totally overwhelmed adjusting back to American culture. It was bliss to have a shower all to myself and a bed, but I was also pretty lonely except for the fact that I had a dog. Eventually, found a room in some divorcee's basement, did that for a while and worked some waitressing jobs. Upgraded to a house with three random Craigslist roommates, only one of whom had to be evicted for being a creep. Worked as a nanny, a T-E-F-L teacher, and then as a life skills teacher for Planned Parenthood. Still struggling adjusting back to life in America, struggling with serious depression, but mostly working my butt off at the multiple jobs to make ends meet. Then I applied and was accepted to law school. Did that? Met my fiance there, graduated, and I'm now a trial attorney. Bumpy, but interesting road. I wouldn't change a thing.

14:28Born and raised in a crappy little California city. I hated it. It was crowded, noisy, polluted, and full of crime. Not to mention there was a huge unemployment rate. Hopped from job to job after school, dated girl after girl, hung out with a friend after friend. None of it really had any lasting effect. It's like nothing was clicking, no matter what I did. Hang, I thought I'd be one of those empty shells that lived through life just going through the paces, but never actually living, you know? After a while, everything was just annoying me. Girlfriends were annoying me, friends were annoying me, even family was getting on my nerves. I go on a clear my head vacation to a family member in Oregon, and god damn, it actually worked. I came home to my crap apartment, took one look at my roommate and declared, I'm done with this crap, all of it. I give my roommate 30 days notice, quit my job, tell my girlfriend to hit the road, tell all my friends to get bent, and move away in just over a month. I moved to Oregon with only a tiny snapshot, but it's like it was meant to be. Been with my wife for over 12 years, working a great job,

15:29owned a great home, happier than I've ever been. I just needed to get away from the bad juju to make it happen. Sometimes wiping the slate clean and taking a chance on nothing but a hunch is what the soul needs. Best of luck to you out there who've done the same. I didn't exactly ghost, but I did abandon the pursuit of a PhD program because the allure of having a doctor prefix against my name just wasn't worth the drudgery I was undergoing. I instead moved continents and took up a new job at an allied field, and I'm more at peace far away from what I found was a pointless academic experience. I do fervently hope that something changes in this so I can resume in a few years and get my doctorate. Yeah, I know a lot of people who start their PhDs and then realize that this is something that's going to be a thankless lot of work unless they get one of the really lucky professor positions or are the sort who really burn with passion for teaching. I think the people who can thrive doing that are amazing, but they are very few and far between and I don't begrudge anyone else who quits on it. I was born and raised in the same town.

16:29I lived there for 20 years. I had two friends that were my best friends from the time I was 12, and one was my roommate. Things started to get weird between us. They obviously didn't care about me and I started to realize it. A few months ago I got into a car wreck and got amnesia from it. If you'd call at that, I lost two days before that and about seven hours after the wreck. I went home and I got in a fight with him over nothing. I honestly can't remember it, but I accused him of stealing things that were already in my room. I was completely out of it and aggressive for no reason. Neither of them believed in me or cared that I got in a wreck. They claimed I was just drunk or on something and that I didn't actually have a concussion. Even though I've never acted aggressive while under the influence of anything, I realized that they didn't care about me anymore, so I told my roommate I was moving out in 30 days and left. I moved four states away and started a new life. I haven't talked to them since. I abandoned doing mortgage and title related work after being laid off from quick and loans, and started working a quick takeout sushi joint. I'm now a practicing sushi chef working at a

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20:47I wasn't exactly an adult at the time, but I dropped out of school at 15 and haven't seen or spoken to anybody I used to know since. I was always a good student by no means a teacher's pet, but I never got into any trouble. And I always found schoolwork itself pretty easy without needing much effort. Then all the GCSE coursework started and I found myself struggling with it. I understood the material, no problem, I just wasn't very good at expressing it in an essay or writing up an experiment. I got caught in a vicious cycle where I was struggling, so I'd put off doing it, and then because of deadlines, struggle even more, so I'd put it off more. In the end, I guess I couldn't handle not being the A student I'd always been, so I refused to leave the house and for a while I wouldn't talk to anybody. 13 years later and I still live with my parents, no job, no qualifications, so no real hope of a job,

21:52no friends and no life. Fortunately, no depression or anything, but there's just no real desire to do anything and I just spend my days at home looking for something to keep me occupied. Stay in school kids. Packed up one day and moved from Georgia to Michigan, for multiple reasons but the key reason was to be with a long-term friend who I'd met on the internet. We tried to make it work for a couple of years, but ultimately we had to break up over Thanksgiving last year. The other reasons were to get the absolute air out of that middle of nowhere hellhole I'd been raised in, out in the country. I grew up in the woods by myself an hour away from everything. It stunted my emotional and social growth to the point that I basically grew up in solitary confinement. I literally lived out on the actual river that they filmed to deliver and so on. It was also a food desert and the few restaurants the next town over were utter crap. Now I live in a little tourist trap on the shores of Lake Michigan. I don't own a car and I can get anywhere I want on bicycle. I spend most days hanging out with folks at the coffee shop downtown which has really good food. I finally have a circle of friends and I meet new people all

22:54the time. The restaurants are all fantastic. The only bad thing is the snow and ice. The windows here suck crap through a screen door. But personally speaking I think it was a good trade because Georgia summers are basically a sauna full of spiders as big as your fricking hands. I miss my mom and my brother and sister though. I wish I could fly down to visit them. I left my home because it had reached such a stagnant state. No water and no electric. Crap went downhill after my mom's boyfriend had a stroke. I took up working to support everyone, but eventually my sister's boyfriend cost me my job. Eventually my mom and I had to live with him and my sister after my mom's boyfriend left as well. It was hell. I knew I had to make a choice. I left home to possibly make something of myself to better take care of my mom. Flash forward to now. I'm still unemployed and homeless but I'm trying. I have several skills but no credentials. I know investment methods to get me out of the rut but I need an initial opportunity to get there. There's one thing I won't do and that's give the F up. Either life is going to break me or I'll break life. I moved out and away from my parents, my co-workers, my very few friends and my state.

24:00I dropped everything, took my cat, traveled nine hours to my now fiance's, no lesser, no note, changed my phone number, changed my legal name. It's great. No more horrible treatment for my dad, no more broken family being a constant emotional issue and reminder every day, no more constant contact from my awful ex on a daily basis, no more people who've known me for years, no more of what I'm used to. It's great. I'm slowly getting on my feet. I've got an okay job, it pays the bills, saving up for a car on the other hand, aiming for my GED this year and then college.