Table for Two | Ella & Vansh On Relationship Weight Gain

0:00Hello and welcome to Table 4 2, I'm Ella. I'm Wanch and this is a brand new show and a brand new addition to the Moss Universe. We've been having the most amazing conversations privately and we thought it was about time we put them in a place where you guys can join in too. Just like Staxi and Nana have flop-cons and pop-cons. We have turn-ons and turn-off. Turn-off right here. I don't know this lighting is very flattering guys but I have to talk about these stretch marks. I've been gaining weight like anything and it's so annoying these stretch marks they start out looking really scary. And a lot of people don't know what fresh stretch marks look like. You know we're used to seeing like, like, when they're white and when they're pale so like when people see these they're like, well you attacked. Who did this to you and Haru, tell them it was dominoes. It's really difficult to bring that up but this reminds me of our topic today which is love-weight.

1:07Yes. We've held the relationship and we've held both of them. I feel like the main reason we have gained weight is that there is no need to be better right now. Not that we don't do anything for one person. But to get a partner, to earn money or to look a certain way, like we have someone who will love us no matter what. And that is sort of, you know, killing us right now. Every time I go to the gym and like by the second set, I'm just like, I think he loves me just the way I am. Every time like my trainer tells me to lift heavier, I'm like, but my boyfriend would make Maggie for me if I went home. But other than that, you know something so silly. If I have to look back at our entire time being together, every time we go out, every time we celebrate, what do we do? We eat. And up, but there's so many things because like we're new money. So now I'm realizing that there's so many other avenues to enjoy life. Like you can go watch a movie, you can take a trip. But I feel like since one's and I both have had like a very middle class upbringing and what happens in those upbringing says,

2:15there's not a lot of avenues to celebrate. So since my childhood, I've seen that if I have a great month or if it's a special day, what do you do? You order food or you go out and eat. And my parents were also in a field of work, which we couldn't travel. They were available on work, they were going to shop, showroom, so we couldn't take trips or vacation. So like I just realized that in my entire life, I didn't learn how to celebrate or be happy without eating. Yeah, same for me and even like we had this conversation a little early. And we were like, how can we celebrate? We can go on dates, we can watch movies, but we do. Let's go to Chili's and order some beer tacos for us. And that's just so sad after a point that you keep eating, you keep eating. That's not good, but you know, it's all, it's, it is an addiction and we are addicted to food I guess. You know, it's like this standard you see around yourself. Like, okay, I have a good passport, what do people do? They wear a clothes like this, wear a clothes like this. And they have a butter chicken at home.

3:17So like when I, you know, I'm in this top 1% of earners in India. And I'm like, what do I want to emulate of this top 1% which I've seen since I was a kid. And it's always the culinary side of being rich. But besides that, like, I personally feel like body image is very relevant to me, which is why also we're noticing it so much. One of them is in a public career. Like that before we think about it, somebody will bring it up in our comments. So we're hyper aware of it anyway, as plus you add the comments and the media attention to it. And also like, we both have our own versions of a transformation. Do you want to like talk about yours? Yeah, yeah, sure. I was 108 kgs at some point. I'm very close to that. But I was a kid, I was a short-look and then I lost like 40 kgs in an year. And everyone around me was shocked. When she came, like most people were like, and I'm generally telling you, I've been talking a lot about this season. They were like, you're a bunch. Are you sure?

4:18And I'm like, where's that? And now since I have gain weight, I feel like I'm this loser again. And then, how do you cope with that? Oh, what's the quickest fix? Let's eat. And when you eat, you gain weight again. And when you gain weight again, you get a lot of sadness. And then somehow, and I'm pretty sure you also feel this. Like it reflects onto us that, yes, if I get sad, of course, you'll get a lot of trouble. So, that's what it's all about. And it has started to affect our relationship a bit. Yeah. And the thing with me is, I never really had like a very big struggle with weight. Maybe because I was on testosterone my whole life as a trans woman. So like, I didn't gain fat as easily. And even if I did, when you're a guy, nobody brings up your weight. It's only after I've transitioned that people have brought it to my attention that a beauty standard be that you have to fit. But the sad thing is whether I like to say it or not, a lot of my brain was being this conventionally attractive women. And sadly, like there is a weight limit on it in the world that we live in.

5:21And so now, when I'm seeing that thing be taken away from me, I guess, when people bring up that like, oh, I no longer fit this box that I used to fit when I was 17. It's affecting me more than all the other comments. I guess because it's also like, what are my actual insecurities? So when someone else points it out, I feel it more because people have like the meanest comments, but they just fly right past me because I've grown over them. But this is a new insecurity and like a new stage of life that I'm still learning to tackle. So it does get difficult at times. And also like that putting your worth in how attractive or how conventionally, you know, beautiful you are. It also translates into our relationship. Like a lot of it has to do with how I perceive your perception of me. So like since I've stopped feeling pretty, I feel like maybe you've not, you've stopped finding me as pretty. And that's affected like how close we are. Our intimacy has taken a toll. There's also other stuff happening medically, which I'll talk about right now. But then that's something that also plays a role because I feel like, you know, oh,

6:24does he still find me attractive? Has something changed? Has something changed? That thought becomes so like heavy on you that your mood shifts. First of all, I'll always find your attractive. And second of all, the thing is even for me, that's what happens. Like if I am short, like if I go short, like if I go in front of you, you know, it would excite me by the look in your eyes and I'm not saying look in your eyes as changed. It is the same. But I think if you're short, I'll be able to see all this fat and then she will be like, then a lot of this also comes from like when I was a kid, I was very young. So there is also a ceiling to which kids can be so young. So if you have a pod belly, that's fine. Papa, you figure it out, but where you start gaining weight on your chest or your hips, like then it goes into the ha ha ha. You're a girl. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And if I can share an instance, I was in class seven or eight and that time they were

7:26teaching us about puberty and one of the days assembly made two or three guys were like off my class only. They were like, Vanch Bhai, you are puberty. And then you know, you feel this thing, oh, wow, my voice is beating. And then they were like, hmm, hips are beating. Oh, yeah. And you know, it takes a hit on you and a baby, I can say it and I can laugh, but like in my head, it still is hurtful to an extent. Yeah. And then it has to be horrible. And Vakyal, I feel like bullying and hating is such learned behavior. So the fact that like you at that young age are being subject to this, like it's a shame that children around us are consuming this kind of content that's telling them that some people's bodies are just wrong. But besides all of that, it's also just like a physical barrier and also like for the record, we're not saying that like gaining weight is bad or like only one kind of body is good or bad. And we have certain standards for ourselves. And when we don't fit them, it makes us uncomfortable. That doesn't mean that objectively gaining or losing weight is bad.

8:26It's just our personal experiences and how we, you know, look at our bodies and how we expect them to be or want them to be. But the other thing is also I, this is TMI. But it's like I've lost the ability to do a lot of the stuff in the bedroom. Like it's like how do I do this position? I'm in a paid beach. It's actually really difficult. I'm not as flexible. I'm so out of breath. And it's like it's actually like a physical constraint. And then it's like this never, it's like this never ending loop of like gaining weight feeling bad. How do you cope with feeling bad? You eat more. And then the thing is going to the gym is even harder because it's like not on my gym clothes fit and gym clothes are really expensive. Why? It comes to bite you back in the ass. But the truth is growing up, I've judged people who've struggled with their weight so much. And I was like, I don't need this deal with it. Just eat less and move more. But then there's such a psychological aspect to it that I'm only realizing now. And the thing is like I have dealt with weight gain before and by the way, you guys used to

9:29bully me like, do some of the parents, teachers and like students and everyone. Then I lost weight and like this is a very bad thing that I did. I became very hostile towards other fat people. Like I've lost weight, so I'm the top of you now. I had this ego about me and that's what I realized that was so wrong. So it's not like you're cheating on it, you're not doing it. You have to unlearn the behavior. Otherwise you just become a part of the problem. And you know, I hate to admit it, but like I was a part of the problem at some point. You know what's one thing that I've also been struggling with. It's going to the gym alone because I feel like Nacha, when you're living together and we're young and our work, like we're in such high stress environments all the time. We have become sort of codependent and it's like, if I go, I'll go, if I go, I'll go, then I'll go. And it's like we have sort of mingle our lives in a way of, like, oh, if he's making

10:29healthier choices, then I'll make healthier choices. If he's going to the gym, then I'll go to the gym, which is also like bad because I feel like in the long run, it's going to affect how we feel about ourselves and then it's going to affect how we feel about each other and then Chhati, we're going to end up despising each other. Yeah, but also like it is a very normal part of life. So we have to figure it out together. And I feel like the problem with going to the gym is that you go gym and by Jesus, no matter where you are on the spectrum of weight and fitness, it will enhance everything that you have. Yeah. Yeah. So like when I go to the gym and I see myself in the mirror now, I feel like, oh, shit, I don't see it like before. I don't see it like before. I don't see it like that. And then I, as much as I've got motivation in me, I'll go gym tomorrow. Tall dies down. And then what's the quickest fix? Oh, KFC. Yeah. Yeah. And then it's such a vicious cycle that I'm like, where I'm just not able to break it.

11:31And the part about despising, I feel like we should not despise each other. That's the only thing we will be able to do is to think that we don't have time to think that, oh, whatever happens, it's a difference. Another thing is, I feel like, and you can tell me if this is how you feel also, I just as a trans woman or as just a human being, my body type is not like your body type or the other girl's body type. So it's like, if I and the girl next to me work out the same way for the next six years, we will have dramatically different bodies at the end. And like, why, in media, you know, the small tiny waist, the small tiny shoulders, the huge hips, like the beauty standard is so unrealistic that the motivation to even reach for it is not there because you know, like, I read without all these extra interventions, I'm not even going to get there. So if I'm not even going to get there, do I even want to starve myself? Do I even want to eat my greens? Do I even want to go to the gym because no matter how hard I work out, I'm not going

12:33to have like a super model build. And that's just how it is. So I feel like that's also something that I'm exploring right now is like, I'm trying to find my own version of healthy. And I'm trying to explain to myself that just because it doesn't look like the idealized version of healthy doesn't mean it's not enough. So like that's also been really hard. Like, why do I need to? If it's not going to amount to looking like a Kardashian. Mains, keeping up appearances. How much of our motivation to maybe groom ourselves or be better version of ourselves is to get a partner because I thought I was above that sort of thing. I was like, I wear stuff for me and I go to the gym for me and then I get a boyfriend and I'm like, fuck all of that. Bring out the joggers and cancel the gym, you know. So what do you think that is for you? Like how much of it are you doing it for getting someone and how much of it is like to feel something? Of course, like getting someone, well a part, you know, when you are not with someone, but for me personally, that thing is more than that.

13:35You know, until and unless I hate something about myself, I just can't work on it. If I don't hate my today financial condition, I just can't work on it. And touch wood like right now, it's okay, comfortable. So my motivation is that I work for the first time I earn money, which is like last year only. So I mean good money whatever. So after that I just stopped making content for some reason. I was like, okay, I'm going to be here for a month, what do I do now? And then you know, we had this talk and then you made me realize, I also realized that the better it doesn't mean that your goal has been achieved. Even if you achieve your goal, you get the abs, you get the money. Then also you need something to move forward to at least maintain that. And the motivation to maintain or to be better isn't just there. But you know what else it is? Like it's not just the lack of motivation for me.

14:36It's also this like just disbelief. Like if I can call it like it's not just the weight, it's the weight of the weight gain. Like it's what it represents. Like it's a story I'm telling myself. It's not just like, oh things have changed about my lifestyle and I've gained weight. It's like all these unhealthy like correlations that I've built growing up. Like, oh, this means I'm lazy. This means is it? Pelle when I used to do it, all that amounts to nothing because in the end I'm end up here. Maybe I'm like, you know, a fake. Maybe I'm just putting on a show and this is who I really am. So it's that story of what it represents. And I feel like that's not just about our bodies are as individuals. But also something that we bring into a relationship. You know me personally, anytime we have problems that are like petty or in my book petty, I'm not as bothered by the problem as I am bothered by being bothered. You know like in the beginning I was like, I don't really want you having a lot of female friends. But I also didn't want to believe that I'm the kind of girl who's not cool enough to

15:38be chill with that sort of thing. So that's also something that in the last year, a lot of my problems have just come and those problems have been the kind of problems that I considered myself above. Like, oh, maybe it's not that I'm not used to it. Like, this is my life, my problem is never going to happen. So those sort of trivial things have now become central and like that's making me question, am I as special as I thought? Am I that special cookie that I used to be? Like, so that way there's like this. Yeah, it's very ego driven also. I don't even want to accept that this is my problem. Let alone start solving it. But like, after all this, do you still feel like we're more close and we have just drifted apart because of our body image issues and everything? I don't think we've drifted apart at all. Like there are problems and mainly in the bedroom. And like, I feel like if anything it has on some level brought us together because now we have this common shared goal and this common shared purpose, which when we started

16:39talking, it was like, oh, we want to amount to something. We want to make money. And then we made it. And there was this sense of achievement and we were like hustling together or whatever. And now there's this other problem, you know, that we have to take care of. And I feel like it's, it's better and also like, touch what I'm so happy that like you create a space for me where I can share it with you without you like, because it's, I've heard too many horror stories of people like putting their partners on diets or like, you know, being really horrible towards their partners for changing even to women after they've given birth. Like, oh, why don't you have abs? It's been two days. Tick tock, tick tock. So I'm really happy that like, Joby is over at least we have each other and we have each other in a very like empathetic capacity. Like I feel like I don't have to explain as much. And the thing about us is that we can talk about it. Like even if I feel like, oh, you know, I feel like there's a lot of connection these days.

17:40You will acknowledge it and not be like, but I'm doing it. I'm doing it. But I'm doing it. And that is a comfortable space that we have built for ourselves. And now we're, you know, that comfortable space, but our weight-worthy, comfortable space we have to move on. You know, let go of it. And you know, like, we just went to the doctor together because I was having some issues about my hormones. And like I said earlier, that this is another problem in my life where I felt like I was above this sort of thing. I was like, I've popped one pill and now I'm going to have double days and a wet. You know, like, so I thought I would not need that kind of intervention. And also like, as proud as I am of my journey and I'm happy where I am, it's not ideal. Like I wouldn't want to be born again and then have gender dysphoria and have to transition. So I don't like going to the doctor and being faced with the facts and being reminded with the facts again, which is also why I'm very irregular with my medications because

18:42I don't even want to feel like I need them. You know, it's like a sad reminder of this one aspect of my life that I'm not exactly comfortable with, which is also why my hormone prescription, I did not know. I did not have follow ups on. I have been basically self-medicating for like the last three years, which is really bad. And like if anyone has started their transition medically, I don't suggest doing this. Please follow up with your doctor. And I remember discussing this with you and you and it felt like the end of the world to me. You know, when I was saying it to you, I was like, this has happened. I'm having this and I have a doubt that it might be my hormones. What will I do with the end of the world? And then you said, oh, but we can go to the doctor about it. Which like in retrospect, of course, I could have done that. But then it took you saying something that I thought was horrible and then making it normal for me because I have admiration for you. You know, it's like if I find it stupid or if I have an insecurity about myself and you're like, oh, I actually really like that part of you. And I feel like that's the really nice part of having you around because sometimes I could

19:43find something so difficult or so unlovable or be so insecure about it. But you look at it and you're like, oh, it's fine. And then you went to the doctor. I had my blood work done. I didn't need to change my dosage. And we're on the right path now. But looking back, it was a 25 kilos well gained. The drinks are sugar free now. But going back, before we got clean, we had one vacation of freedom and we went to Lucknow. Oh, yeah. And let me tell you all, Lucknow has the best food in all of India. And all of the world, Delhi food, Mumbai food, you don't stand a chance. I'm telling you guys. And you know, Lucknow food, you know, try it yourself. You all will start hating on Delhi food yourselves. And the thing is, when you said this for the first time, I had a lot of ego about my Delhi food because I came to Bombay and I was like, you know, what my beliefs stand true. I was like, I can't eat Delhi. I'm better.

20:43So when you said that to me, I was like, yeah, whatever. And then I went to Lucknow. And we had that mutton. What was it, Peshawari? No, no, no. Yeah, yeah, mutton Peshawari. Yeah, the mutton Peshawari. And it had like cinnamon and it was like, it was next to a mother's touch. Like, I've never felt more love than I felt that night. And I have to like, take it back. Lucknow really, really wins. And I'm like, such a stuck up, such a posh girl. Like, it feels to go in. I said, Patli Patli, I'm like, I'm like, I'm going to bar. But then Lucknow's chalk, anything for that galottic above. And how did you feel the first time you had a chalk or a tunde kababie, kabab in your mouth? OK, so I'd... Wow! Best way to put it. I knew it. Listen, I'd had like galottica. There's this spot in Delhi. It was called Rajendra Dhabab. And we would go there, especially for the galottic above. And they were like peak. You know, that's like the best of Mughalai food ever.

21:43And then I was like, what's better? Galottica above. And I said, and then you ordered them for me. And that was OK. But when we went there, it was different, which is something that I don't understand. Why is it different when you order? No, it's not different. The thing is, with tunde kababie, their taste of each branch has been a little different. So the chalk one is the best. If you are going to Lucknow, book your caps to Akbarie Gate, ask any one tunde, where it is, walking distance. Go there, have the kababs. Thank me, Dator. Also, this is completely unrelated. But I have to tell you that Lucknow is literally like a movie. I landed and random people at the airport were like, welcome to Lucknow. Welcome to Lucknow. Then we went to chalk, and I was buying it there. And these two girls come out of the store. And they're like, did he out, did he out? And I went outside and they gave me two chocolates. He was like, what's this? He was like, five, six-year-old girls giving me chocolates. And I felt so bad. He was like, we are in the chocolate later. But they really wanted me to have them. Then the store owner called me back. And he goes, your tashreef, where is he from?

22:45And I was like, oh, I'm running out of my man. And then I told him, and then he started doing life shiree. And I was like, this is the Lucknow I was promised. It was really such an experience. Chef special, no comparisons. If you had to describe my love, what dish would it be? You know, I want to have a fancy answer. But the fancy answer is not going to be comfortable in the long run. You know what we are? We're Maggie. We're always going to be there. 2 a.m. 3 a.m. college dorm, new apartment, just for comfort. We're always going to be there. We're Maggie. We're so Maggie. Garib Amir Pujbio. Exactly. Like Maggie's always there for you. And you're so reliable. It's so Maggie. That has to be your term. Like that has to be like, it's so Maggie. What would you say? I would say you are a very nice temperature. They keep beads in the pewey and goch-t-galt-a-muttan-biryani. And you're just, it feels like, oh, I can die after having this.

23:50This is the peak of everything in my life. You watch. Is the Biryani for 370? Sorry. My brain just had it. I just had to go there. Anytime. I swear that guy has ruined Biryani for me. OK, since we are on the wait while a topic, what's a baggage that you had to deal with? You know, my baggage. But like, what's my commitment? I don't think it's such a good thing. The thing about me is, anytime I'm entering a relationship, I'm rarely even thinking about, do I even like this person? I'm always sort of coming from the place of am I appealing enough? Am I appealing enough? And then my whole life of transitioning. And then, you know, in transgender people also, there's this hierarchy. Whoever is the prettiest always gets a different kind of attention and a different kind of respect than those people who transition and do not look not even pretty, do not look as feminine, or do not look as masculine as the gender they identify as.

24:52And so, why I do feel like a lot of my value came from that. I didn't want to do, but then people on the internet, they say, oh, we love her because she looks like a real girl. We love her because she's very beautiful. So, some part of me believed that was also part of what you loved about me, which it's totally fair to love me because I'm hot. But I thought it was going to be the most important component. And so, yeah, I feel like I kind of dumped that insecurity onto you. Like, oh, if I don't fit this standard, is he still going to like me? Is he still going to find me attractive? And I'll always love you and find you attractive. And baggage, the same like, because I was my own, like, oh my God, am I enough? Am I enough? Am I enough? Am I in enough life? Am I? And still, there is a feeling sometimes, oh, what am I doing? Am I not doing it? And a lot of it stems from the insecurity of, you know, how I look at people about me, how I think I think I brought that baggage into the relationship

25:55and subconsciously, consciously, you know, put it onto you. But it's actually not your job to tell me the message of the right and wrong. Of course, if you want something, you will tell me. I mean, I would disagree a little bit. I think it's like part of my responsibility and your responsibility to like give each other reassurance when we need to because like, what else is a partner for if not emotional support? I read somewhere, like, anything that you admire in a partner is anything that you secretly want for yourself. Like, if you want to, if your partner's really confident, it's not that you just like that they're confident. It's like you want to be confident like them. If they're successful, you want to be successful like them, not in like a poaching, stealing way, but just as a admiring, well, you're cheese. Yeah, me, like in the beginning of the relationship, I was like, oh my God, she has so many followers and these deals log out. And I was like, oh, what am I not doing?

26:56And somewhere, like I had to tell myself that she has been doing this for years. You know, more years than you have been doing for weeks or months. So give yourself that time, give yourself, give the work that commitment. Yeah. At least, let it be, let it be. And then see what happens. And the only thing is that if I'm more fit, or I'm more healthy, it's because like, three or four years, everything is going on. So some, and same for you, if you are more famous, we have been doing this for a longer period of time. And if I go to the corner, or like if you jump onto my bandwagon, of course, we will stumble and fall. Yeah. And I feel like that's what happened. Did it like, was it as a very obvious to you? Or a little bit? Not really obvious to me, but I definitely felt like that that just happens. That happens in siblings also. I see moments where my sister is sort of not in Vegas, but like insecure, because when I was 18,

27:58my life looked different, and hers looks different. And growing up, I was sometimes, I was the fully envious. He like, why is she getting to shop for makeup? And I'm not for reasons and whatever. Yeah. So I mean, those kinds of things do happen when you're close people, and we have very stalky different lives. But also another thing that I personally really dealt with is like, I've had to go around and rearrange my entire wardrobe, because like clothes don't fit me the same way. Even if I buy the bigger size, it doesn't look the same on my body as it did 20 kilos ago. And that's like a bit of a struggle, because I've already done that so many times. You know, you're dressing like a guy. Then you're dressing like a girl, and then you're figuring out what kind of a girl you like to dress as. And then you add in another curveball of like your proportions, changing your weight, changing your confidence, changing. That's really hard, and it's really expensive. Like, like I said earlier, like I want to go to the gym so bad, but the gym clothes are so expensive. And I need bigger ones. These sports bras are like suffocating.

28:59Like, how will I work out? And it's so expensive. And also, like, I have to say this, he like brands a lot of them feel like people grow everywhere all at once. And I wish that was me. I wish my tits and my ass grew with the belly, but that's not. It doesn't work out for some of us. Some parts react to fat differently. And like, it's so sad because like any time I try to find a dress that's going to fit my shoulders, it's lose on the waist. If it fits my waist, it's like suffocating me here. So like in that way, I'm tired of people like only designing for ideally proportionate bodies. So before we started dating, you know, I'm always oversized. You know, baggy clothes are worn on the upper side. You just can't tell that it's made of a cloth. It's so good. And then when we met, you saw everything. You saw, you were like, wear tight-fit clothes. You know, like proper, herchise, silhouettes. They're there. And then I started wearing polos and these fitted pants. And when I gained weight, it was such an insecurity.

30:01Like, so bad for me. I was, I got very insecure. Oh my God, I have to wear baggy clothes again. So many of these three-year-old bodies are made and now I'm again worn out. I have to wear baggy clothes again. And I used to wear baggy clothes first. There's nothing wrong with it. It's just the association I had with the polos and the chinos. Now I'm different. So I wear it like this. But also the more frustrating part is, there's no one size fits all to this. Ha ha ha, an intended killak. Weight gain and weight loss is not the same for everyone. Think killak, oh you ate a lot of food, you gain weight. For me, it was also hormonal reasons, right? And then it's like, oh, eat a salad and you lose weight. But for me, if I eat a salad, it actually, like, it makes me so sick, like I can't have fiber. And greens literally make me ill. I literally had the worst infection of my life during lockdown because this time I had to have Gharakwana. And it's my fault. It's just so boring that you don't eat chicken

31:05by the way. And the problem with going cold turkey on anything, that's why at the addiction centers, slowly, slowly, your addiction comes down. You have to take it slowly that you're gym. Let's eat junk today. I'll do junk tomorrow. I'll have large pizza. So we'll have one large pizza. And share the link. Yeah, that's also something that I, like, for the last two weeks, we've just been walking after our meals and I feel like that's so much easier. And I've been able to do it consistently because my body isn't going into shock. So that's something that's really worked for me. Also, late night. No, you should not. But we'd stay up late. That's what's fucked us up. If we could just sleep on time and not spend that 3,000 rupees at 3 a.m. every day. It's also like that's also so sad. It's so expensive. You know, literally, like, I think we spend around 25,000 for a few days on food.

32:08In Lucknow? No. Recently before coming to the trip, I was like, do you have money because I don't. I was so nervous about coming to Bombay because I was like, I'm in between invoices and I like food. So I don't have money. It was so stressful. It's costing us. Like, it's our shock. What is this junk food? But junk food should be expensive. Because it's tasty, the problem with, like, same thing with healthy food. Like, who's eating the rice? Right? Eat it with salt and then it'll go to the stomach. But it's, the way it's cooked, right? It's a mess. It's necessary that if I'm eating healthy food, then it should be a salad. We want to have it. I want olive oil here. And then there's grilled chicken in between. But like, you can eat cheap foods. Right? You can just have boiled rice, boiled chicken, boiled with cheese. I'm just going on a very political tangent. And I'm suddenly in a bad mood. Because why is it expensive to be healthy? Why have we collectively globally,

33:08as a civilization decided that, like, health is going to be expensive. Healthy food, health care, losing, gym memberships are, you're telling me that going to the gym for one hour a day cost this name as, like, private school feast. What is this? I don't understand why it's health so expensive. Palette cleanser, the missing ingredient. I've pulled up a bunch of statistics about couples gaining weight in their relationship. Because surprise, surprise, it's a very common phenomenon, guys. It's not just us. And what you have to do is, like, guess the facts of these statistics. OK. And if you're close, you get the point. OK, you don't have to be spot on. OK. So first, in a US survey of 2,000 people in relationships, the average respondent had gained blank kg since they started dating their current partner. Let me think. This is the first take. 16 kgs. Am I right? Yeah. But do you know what this means? This means we're above average.

34:08Let's go. 25 kgs can't beat us. OK, number two. In that same study, they found that about dash kg of that total weight was gained in the first year of finding love. Like, how much of that 16 was in one year? I would say 12 to 13. You're off. It was seven kgs, which is actually so crazy. Because I gained seven kgs in the first year. How do they say? OK, a little average. But I gained seven kgs. Remember, because I had that surgery planned, and I couldn't have it because I gained seven kgs. That was the number that was given to me. But I gained 15 kgs. So I'm on the excellence page. Women who start living with a romantic partner show increased obesity risk within dash years, while men take about dash years. How many years for women? I don't comment on women bodies. Women's bodies. For men, I would say obesity in like four to five years.

35:09OK, so for women, it's one year. For men, it's two years. And I'll tell you why, because they're stressing us out these demons. The first year of dating, they take you for a toll three months in, and you're already like eating to soothe yourself. Because it's the best. And I see those. They just, they always have something I'm telling you. That's why women are gaining faster. In the first few years of marriage, men's likelihood of being overweight increases by about dash percent. 12 to 15%. It's actually 5%. Because guess what? These women are not doing to their husbands. They're not making them cook and clean and put their jewelry away so their brothers in law can have them. They're not stressed out enough, guys. We need to change these numbers. And the last one is, in relationships where one partner diets, the other partner is dash percent more likely to also change their eating habits. 67%. It's 30%.

36:10But I think I influenced you more than you. Because I thought, I was not overweight or whatever, but I ate crap then also. You came in with your boiled chicken and rice, and look at you now. Well, you are the bigger influencer. Yeah. Janu, so how much did I score? You won the day you got with me. So you don't need this score to tell you you won. Check, please. So many P.I. YouTube's Janta. Like this video, subscribe, comment, high-five this video, and Madam Geet. Thank you so much for watching. Let us know in the comments if there's any other topics you would want us to take up. And we'll see you next week.