Ryan Bridge: What's the secret to a good marriage?

What are your chances of getting divorced?

The new Stats NZ numbers are interesting for a couple of reasons. 

1. Fewer people are getting hitched. In 2025, 7.6 marriages per 1000 people. That's half of the rate in 2000 (15.5 per 1000). In 1971, peak marriage, it was 45 per 1000 people. 

So basically, fewer of us are bothering to get married. I've got friends who are single and don't mind being single - that was far less acceptable in 1971. 

2. We're getting married later in life. We used to put a ring on it around the age of 20, now we wait until we're into our thirties.

This is part of a bigger trend. People still live at home with their parents when their 25 - it's common. They go to university, don't get proper jobs until they're sometimes in their late 20's or even early thirties.

We're living longer at the other end of life, and it feels like we're stretching out childhood a bit at the beginning, too. Get a dog, live at home, complain about house prices, and then marry later. 

3. Divorce is the most interesting part.

If you're in a marriage and you're wondering whether you might get a divorce then I reckon you probably will. Otherwise, why would you be thinking about or worrying about it?

The numbers tell us how long you're married before you call it quits; 5% within five years. 15% within 10 years. 1/3 within 25 years. 

But here's the good news. The news you should hope for. 

60% of couples remain married for the rest of their lives. 

Happily ever after, just like in the movies. 

As the old saying goes, the best way to stay married is to not get divorced.

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