Prepare For The Bad Stuff With Carly Taylor

Have everyone, it's Kali here for this week's Mojo Monday.

So we would all have a story where we've lost it.

So something's happened and we've exploded with anger or went into a complete panic or

we said something we regretted almost immediately.

And then afterwards you look back and you think that's actually not who I want to be.

And one of the reasons I love practising storcism is that it trains us to stay calm and

self-aware even in those moments.

Not because the emotion disappears but because we want to act in line with our values even

when things feel really intense inside us.

Because when we don't we tend to get hijacked and so we react instead of respond and often

the outcome is something that really could have been avoided.

But here's the key that ability doesn't just show up when you need it.

You can actually train yourself for this.

And that kind of reminds me of this great Storic line from Seneca.

So he said if you would not have a man flinch when the crisis comes train him before it comes.

So one way to train it is to stop pretending life will always go to plan.

So if you walk around assuming everything will work out or you don't even want to kind

of consider the bad stuff you're setting yourself up to be pretty much blindsided.

And Ron Hellerday talks about devastation as that feeling of being completely crushed

and shocked by an event and a big part of that shock comes from this.

We actually didn't think it would happen or we didn't acknowledge that it would happen.

So instead we prepare.

So you prepare for the judgment of others.

You prepare for the discomfort of a tough workout or you prepare for not getting the job

or prepare for things going wrong.

And this isn't being pessimistic.

It's actually being realistic.

It's in a ready way.

You can even visualize it.

And this is what the Stoics used to practice.

See the situation in your mind and then see yourself handling it well.

So staying calm, speaking with intention, acting like the person that you want to be.

And of course there's no crystal ball.

You can't predict everything.

But you can build a mindset that's not shocked by difficulty because the reality is life is hard.

Hard things will happen, whether you think positively or not.

So the question isn't, can I avoid it?

It's more can I be ready for it?

And when you are, you don't just get through it.

You actually show up as the person that you want to be.

So this week, instead of just hoping that everything goes smoothly, ask yourself, what

might be hard in this situation?

What could be really challenging this week?

And how do I want to show up when it is?

So train that because the moment will come and then when it does, you'll be ready for

it.

So have a great week everyone and I will catch you next week.

See ya.