Ode to the Tight-Bootied Homos

On today’s show:

• Ode to the Tight-Bootied Homos – Pastor Manning invents yet another slur while explaining gentrification, Black politics, Obama’s alleged sex life, and why God wants everyone dead

• Texas congressional candidate promises mosque-to-toilet conversions – Turning places of worship into public restrooms, banning halal, and declaring hijabs “bomb concealers”

• Former Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda goes nuclear – An all-time unhinged rant featuring limousines, batting averages, and many, many cocksuckers

• School bus driver busted for banging a prostitute – Dover, Delaware man allegedly pays for sex on a school bus near a church, because of course

• Florida teen arrested in pork chop assault – Domestic dispute escalates to a slap and a flying piece of meat

• Streamer Licari fallout continues – Porn addiction rehab, Twitch bans, and a very carefully worded non-apology

• Racist streamer piles on – Reminds everyone to “check your primes,” but only if they’re not supporting certain kinds of pedophiles

• Frankie McDonald drops a snowstorm warning – Shouts out Ohio while reminding everyone to wear winter gear… and go for walks?

• New mildly-retarded weatherman emerges – GB the Weatherman brings professionalism, a speech impediment, and yellow-teeth rage

• Pastor Manning vs. Al Sharpton – Semen lattes, long-legged Mac Daddies, and why Manning should’ve been mayor of New York

• VR Chat insanity – Proximity Chat accused of stalking, stabbing, murder, and possibly being armed; police allegedly “tracking” him via GPS

• First Amendment VR auditor fantasy – Because nothing says freedom like screaming at anime avatars near virtual trees

• Food-based violence roundup – Pork chops, taco plates, beef tubes, and Florida’s proud tradition of edible weapons

• Voicemails & texts – Dating on Demand deep lore, “it’s just a fun thing,” Sextastic Tuesday headaches, and candle mix-ups involving prolapsed assholes

• Support the show – Sideshow exclusives, Patreon perks, episode sponsorships, and why Spotify is a pain in Tim’s ass

Plus:
Snowstorms, nosebleeds, dog-washing disasters, racist grifters, VR families falling apart, and yet another reminder that Florida is our most fucked-up state.