Nick is worried about the climate crisis

0:00I need to lay in bed and just listen to somebody Dason has got a brain. So go away. Goodbye. Hello. Hello. I think she's gone. The UN has warned that overshooting the critical 1.5 degree sea warming limit is now inevitable. Oh, no. In the best case scenario, global temperature will now hit 1.8 degrees higher than it was before we started mucking about with this. However, in the worst case scenario, we could see temperatures saw by as much as two degrees centigrade in the next few years. And while two degrees hotter is not something serious in a bath, it is apparently very serious in a planet. That is assuming, of course, that you believe in science. Experts warn that impacts are going to be devastating. Non-experts say there is nothing to worry about and even talking about this kind of thing is woke and being woke is a bad thing. Ain't that right, Nudge? I'm a nutcase. There are no good outcomes if we remain above 1.5 degrees centigrade, said Inga Anderson.

1:02Inga out of the executive directorship of the United Nations Environment Programme. And I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, what is the executive director of the United Nations Environment Programme know about the environment? Compared to say, oily charlatans in union jacks ox, who will say anything to please the fossil fuel interests, giving them money and to appeal to the math brewers who get their ideas of anti social media. Inga Anderson out of the UN said across the globe, extreme heatwaves are already proving that climate impacts will strike faster, hit harder and last longer, costing more lives and causing deeper disruption. As an aside, strike faster, hit harder and last longer does sound like a Pepsi advert. Along the lines of Lipsmaek in first crunch in ACE tasting motivating good buzzing call tock and high, for walking fast, living, ever giving call for his in Pepsi. I better go that right. Anybody under the age of 50 is going, what? You don't know what you're missing, kids.

2:05Inga Anderson out of the UN said, now is the time we must double down on climate action. We can and must get it on the right path by cutting greenhouse gatheth, strengthening resilience and adaptation and ensuring exceedance of 1.5 degrees centigrade is as small and as short as possible. So said Inga and all the trolls who inhabit the comments sections in the right wing press, vomited their brains up all over the internet, screaming about the woke arrearsty and how the planet used to be hot once. And that is proof that the so called experts have got it wrong. And they're just saying that there is such a thing as climate change because they want to control our thoughts or some such thing. We no longer wish to hear the opinions of experts they'll say, which is quite the position to hold when they only consult experts when they want to get their car mended or they're plumbing sorted or their teeth fixed experts are their first port of call when it matters to them personally, but other than that, they hate them.

3:06Oh fabulous. The 1.5 degrees centigrade global warming limit was introduced as part of the Paris Agreement on the 12th of December 2015. And there have been many COP meetings since which have been not much COP. Corrig. However, the new report warns that this warming limit is now out of the window with warming of at least 1.8 degrees and now expected. And that will mean that the weather we choose to be at the end of the news will now be the news. And the evidence of climate change is obvious and all around unless you really don't want to see it. We just had the hottest summer ever, the driest summer ever and the hottest 10 years since records began have all been in the last 10 years. Are you beginning to see a trend? No. And the hotter it gets, the worse it comes. And the hotter it gets, the worse the outcome for us, you know, the literal people, not leprechauns. These include these outcomes, include but are not limited to the destabilization of major ice sheets,

4:09which would mean we'll all be drowned. The degradation of the Amazon rainforest, without which there will be no food. And the disruption of the Atlantic, Mary Dional overturning circulation, which is the system of currents that moves warm surface water north and cold, deep water south, without which we'd all be up to our eyebrows in ice. So no biggie. And it really doesn't matter if you affect not to believe in science because banks and insurance companies do, so it's going to get you anyway. Long before you'll get wet, freeze and starve to death. And most of the immediate effects will be felt in the poor replaces because they always are. But when millions of people leave their homeland because their crops fail and their alternative is just sit there and die, where do you think they'll come? Exactly. It's weird that the politicians that wail about foreign invasions are the same ones promoting policies that will make that happen. Met office forecasters said that the average temper for June,

5:10July and August across day and night was higher than the record set last year. This summer was one of the sunniest on record, as you can see from all the parched grassland. It means that the 1976 summer, which people of a certain age do bang on about, almost as much as they go on about 1966. The summer of 76 and its heatwave is now just the seventh most intense summer in recent memory, with the top five hottest seasons all occurring since 2003. Dr Amy, who leads the National Climate Information Center at the Met Office, said the conditions we've seen this summer have broken UK climate records once again. She said particularly noticeable is how much we've extended rather the previous summer mean temperature record set just last year. And next year is predicted to be even hotter because of El Nino, which isn't caused by global climate change, but it will be turbocharged by it. But that's the climate.

6:11What's the weather going to be like? Well, tonight mostly dry. Mostly. Cooler than last night with showers in the North West, because of course there will be showers in the North West, checking for your volume weight. Ah ha! It's raining at the moment in Glasgow. Don't tell me that it isn't, but because it is. It will further be raining tomorrow, raining on Sunday, raining on Monday, raining on Tuesday, raining on Wednesday, raining on Thursday, raining on Friday, and oh! Not raining next Saturday. rubbish. It will have a raining on Sunday, next Sunday. Yes! And then raining on Monday after that, and the Tuesday following, and the Wednesday thereafter. Raining every day for the rest of your lives. Oh well. You knew that when you moved there.

7:11For the rest of us, Saturday will be mostly dry with sunny spells. Would you like to hear the long-range forecast for the next four weeks? No! Outlook for Sunday to Tuesday. Rain spreading south-east, heaviest in the Western Scotland. Brighter conditions will follow with showers, some heavy, and thundery, thunder lightning, very very frightening. What do you want? Very warm on Sunday, then turning cooler for the coming days. And now, the middle two weeks of September. Dry and cool at night, some rain for next week, followed by longer, dry interludes, especially in the south and the south-west. And then, last week of September the beginning of October. Blimey. Can you believe it? October already. They'll be playing Jesus' birthday songs in the supermarket before you know it. End of September beginning of October, settled conditions and then rain in places. And I think we know which places in particular. Temperatures will likely be a little above average with relatively warmer nights to come. Temperatures will likely be a little above average

8:12with relatively warmer nights to come. Well, take it. It says, yet again, night or farage is up to his neck in innocence. Reaking of probacy and just as fishy, grayish, white, and popular with multi-millionaires, as the oysters he enjoys with his champagne. I listen up with material. I'm going to let that one through. I'm feeling in an excellent mood because I managed to get in today without my car blowing up, even though it told me that it was going to. Oh, I almost had a heart attack coming in today. Please, people, pay attention. This is serious. Stop driving at 10 miles an hour for crying out loud. If it says 20, do 20. Not 19. Not 18. 20. The amount of being and banging and boning is going on in my car. It's practically screaming at me to stop driving so slowly.

9:14It is actually telling me to do that. Stop driving so slowly. Use stupid more on it said. And stop pulling away. How can you do that? Wait, you just want me to stay where I am. Stop pulling away. I was doing my nut. Somebody was, it was like they were doing a tour of the West End. Crawling along it, barely 10 miles an hour. My car is behind them and it's going, I'm just going, it's going, hello. Warning, warning. We're about to exploit it. It was like, um, you know, like the alien monster film. Steam started coming out of the pipes and the, like, orange lights going round and around and this disembodied woman's voice saying, this car will self-explode in T minus three minutes. And then I decided to go back for the cat.

10:18You're wondering what it's all about and I can't tell you because I don't know myself. Yeah, it's me complaining about my car again. Winging and whining and moaning. This says, good evening Nick. Interesting to see Mr Farage in an undercover video enjoying oysters and champagne if you please. Whereas during the publicity for his recent biomext, and we only ever saw him drinking pints of beer and eating ice creams, that's right. Only a lefty loony would come to the conclusion that he's not as much a man of the people as he'd like his order to believe. Maybe he's going to spend his five million pound on caviar and quails eggs. It says Robin and Crosby. Yeah, and the cashmere socks. Don't forget the cashmere socks, Robin. I mean, what is he today? He dresses up more than Mr. Blobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, where do we? Is he a farmer today? Is he a stockbroker today? Is he going to Henley-Rigatta? What have you come as, Nigel? 0-345-6060-973.

11:19Best of green, hello, Nick. Oh, hello, Nick. Hi. Nick. Just a single observation really. No more points to make after that. But there's a hand dryer, a very ubiquitous, called World Dryer. I don't know if the clue is in the title. We press it on and you get a lovely, nice, huge gust of hot air. Great. But you can't turn it off. It just goes on and on. You know, you finish, but it's blowing and blowing. If there was just press the button again, it went off. Maybe they just haven't thought of that. Anyway, I'll just... But it is called the World Dryer. Maybe it's trying to do that. Yes, maybe. Maybe it's got some sort of sensor inside, and it will turn off only when there is no moisture in the air. Well, thank you for pointing that out to us, Nick. I shall investigate that thoroughly. Full report on your desk first thing in the morning. Okay, well, not first thing in the morning. You know, around about lunchtime. How does the afternoon sound to you?

12:19Of course it's the weekend. You don't really want the work of the weekend. I have it for you Monday morning, Monday afternoon. Can we pencil you in for Wednesday? This says, I wonder how many regular blokes down at the pub, but order half a dozen oysters in a black velvet. Just asking questions says Alex from Barnsley. They see you, Nige. They see you. Let's see now. Nourberry. Hello, Tony. Yeah, how you doing? How you doing? How you doing? How you doing? Tony. Yeah, I'm good, man. You all right? Yeah, fine, thanks. Sounds like you're talking to us with your head in a bucket. Well, that's our reception. Come from sunny London. Right. Well, that explains it. Hmm. Here's a bell. Anyway. Here, just one of the things that you can see. Yeah, I just wanted to like, um, reiterate what Jander Brown has gone on about, um, Nigel Farad today.

13:21As in with, um, the dodgy contacts, regarding the, um, content for the polling from foreign millionaires, billionaires, what you want to call them. What's your fault? You said you wanted to reiterate what James O'Brien said. That James O'Brien did not come on the air and ask me what my thoughts were. I can guarantee you that didn't happen. Okay, well, I just wanted to know if your faults are. Well, what are your thoughts, Tony? Um, well, nothing's, no money's been passed until this investigation is finally concluded. You know, Jander O'Brien, um, he always turns it into racism. And um, racist, um, what's this got to do with racism? Well, when he talks about Nigel Farad or Trump,

14:23yeah, he always seems to relate about the racism. Well, um, if he's talking about the color of, uh, uh, uh, uh, Donald Trump's skin, then that would be offensive to, uh, the orange community. So if that's what you mean, Tony, then I completely understand. I'm outraged on your behalf. Thanks a lot, mate, for, you know, whatever that was. You want to know my thoughts? Tetshi Fagash is scrambling to contain a storm over an illegal donations sting, which is different from the other donations problem because that wasn't a sting. Are you keeping up with this so far? No. The party leader insisted no laws have been broken after undercover footage, emerged of him and his aides discussing taking money from a fake US business person. No laws have been broken. Case closed, move along. We heard it from none other than Mr. Reliable himself. Fagash claimed the operation was a clear case of entrapment, but that's not really very important.

15:25Doesn't matter how evidence is collected, more than what the evidence shows. And Tetshi acknowledged the video showed aides saying things that perhaps should not have been said. Still, it's just words, case closed, move along, please. Or your name is on a list. Two key figures in reform, James Orr and Dan Jukes, are standing aside from their respective jobs as head of policy and assistance to the leader, while allegations are looked into. That is assistant to the leader, not assistant leader. And we are deep in the office territory now. You know, I think if the Fagash plays David Brent, Richard Tyson's definitely Gareth. In fact, we should call him Gareth from now on. It will drive him nuts. And the story is that a report broadcast by Channel 4 News claimed that reform was seeking funding from a US firm for three polls at commissioned earlier this year, costing £32,500. The purported donors were, in fact, undercover reporters from investigate,

16:27they, I always fall over that word. I'll have a run-up as it. The purported donors were, in fact, undercover reporters from investigative group verbatim, posing as an American financier and his UK-based son, which is very mean of them. Senior officials, including Fagash, are also said to have discussed a half a million pound donation from the fake businessman through his son. And speaking at LBC, Fagash said, the party has broken no laws. The party has not taken any dodgy money or anything like that whatsoever. However, it is a clear case of entrapment and they work that for a very, very long time and they've got a couple of our contractors to say things that perhaps should not have been said. And as a result of that, you know they have been removed this morning and yeah, you know, I'm not happy about it. Oh, he's not happy. And I'm not sure that's relevant either. He seems to be unhappy about everything all of the time.

17:30Unless he's doing a photo shoot on another flying visit to wherever it is he is an MP to get a snap of him eating an ice cream and then it's off to the lords or Henley or the Savoy or wherever a man in a stripy blazer and pink trousers would fit in because it certainly isn't clack-ton. But I'm worried about that whole where did you get the money thing because reform are on the case. Reform have launched an investigation into itself. Oh fabulous. A Reform spokesperson said Reform UK has launched an investigation following the broadcast of a channel for news program. I don't know why they speak like a police person but they just do. It said both individuals involved have stepped down from their respective positions pending the outcome of the investigation. Reform UK and Lee Anderson. Reform UK chairman. Chairman, Lee Anderson told Sky News that there was no chance of them returning to the party. But and it's a huge but

18:33Deputy leader, Gareth Richard Ties refused to rule out a comeback for the two saying let's wait and see what the investigation says. So the chairman says no and the deputy leader says hmm is that clear? No. And I think the people in the middle of this said it weren't me. I ain't done nothing. Or worse to that effect. And I really think that we should relieve the reform family to grieve in private at this time and our thoughts and prayers with their families, thoughts and prayers. There you are, that previous caller. There's a full and frank answer. Is there anything else you require? I'll assume that the answer is no. Yes. This says won't be anything to eat in South Norfolk. All they keep doing is putting more and more solar farms in the fields. Well, you can eat those. Just put a bit of sauce on them. Lovely.

19:36They keep putting more and more solar farms in the fields. Right. So I guess you have a choice. Which would you rather die of? The cold, this winter or a lack of pudding? This says, Hynac, do you think these latest allegations of financial irregularity to hit reform UK are just more examples of living in what farage calls a complaint society? Winging and whining and moaning. It's a complainant society is what he said. Yeah. What a nerve. Him complaining about people complaining. I mean, in the entire history of your existence on this planet, have you ever heard anybody complain about more than Tetshi Fagash? Zummers that. Hello, John. Hello. How are you doing? Good times. Do you know, I thought I just asked you a question that's not respective than you've been talking about. Yes. Please. Um, I don't know how tall you are.

20:37Yes. This tall. Five foot. Well, not quite this tall, but this tall. If you add it, if you add it for shoes about this tall. But what I'm trying to say is why are all clothing when you go and buy clothing? Yeah. Like designed for people who are 17 foot tall. It's like you get trousers that are too long. Oh, you get shirts. You have to be in the right hand. Well, I've got an answer for the trousers thing. Yes, it's trousers and the shirt. Well, I have an answer for the trousers thing. You want to list them individually and I can give you an answer to each individual. I'm not tall enough. I'm not tall enough. No, well, for the trousers thing is it's easy to put to turn trousers up to your correct height. Very difficult to turn them down if they've been finished too short. I do know that. My mother was a teen sister. Well, why are you asking me for them? Because I don't know ones that tall. And the shirt, nothing as well. The orangutan arms of the shirts.

21:38I mean, there's no reason for a shirt to be that. Why can't we have sizes in terms of shirts like? Well, I think they do. Don't they? If you... Oh, I'm sure. Yeah, they do that. I'm pretty sure they do that. I mean, well, if you go to a gentleman's house, you go to Taylor's house. I'd never been to a Taylor in my life. I've been to a street. A street where Taylor's reside, but I've never actually been in one. I wouldn't dare. I mean, nothing in there. You've got to settle row and you appear in the shop window and you look for lonely for a price on anything and that does not exist. I bet I've got a price on anything in there. If you have to ask, you can't afford it. But Nick, why is the percentage of P6 or 6 foot? Oh, you know, I'm sure the percentage of people at 6 foot are less than the rest of us. So why is it all closing? The phrase is to that. Well, the trousers thing is easy because of the reason I've got to describe. And a shirt's thing. I don't know. Old men used to wear these...

22:40What do you call it? A garter on the top of their arm and their bicep is. That's a big of a riverboat thing. And it would pull their shirt sleeves to the required... But no, I've never seen anybody wear one of those. That my granddad, and that was about 40 years ago. Nick, that's true. Yeah. But I tell you what, I spoke to your colleague just now, but I just spoke to him. He has the same problem with clothing. He said to me, so I'm not the only one. Right. Well, okay. So... I had no idea that, you know, people were socializing behind my back. Am I not in your WhatsApp group? No, I'm not in any WhatsApp group. It's a little better. But I just thought I'd ask you because you look like to me when I see you. You look like you're already... Well, I'm a dedicated follower of fashion. There's nothing about clothes I don't know. Here we are. Take care, Mr. Yeah, okay. Thanks a lot, John. Sorry to hear about your short limbs.

23:46This is... Hi, Nick. Finding your show just over a year ago, it has kept me amused on a Friday night whilst at work and on catch-up during the week. Oh, I see. I'm here for your amusement. I amuse you. Like a clown. He said, I particularly find the Donald Trump nickname's high-larious and hopefully I have one for you of my own. Oh, he's just buttering me up. Don't keep bloating as in... Don't... Okay. I was not expecting that. That's pretty good. Donkey bloating as in Donkey hoate. Oh, that is definitely going on the list and I'll have to put it on there now before I forget. I don't want to forget that one. This list is about 100 names that's strong and all of these... and it's becoming frighteningly fast. God, I'm going to have to write another book soon. It's going to come out in January with the 8th of Z of the year, which is what we do over the Christmas period.

24:49And I've got all of these names. There must be at least a hundred. I can't think of anybody else in the history of humankind that has created so many nicknames and rude names about him. I mean, he is unique in a very special way. Donkey bloating. The Donkey bloating. And that is added with recent ones like Captain Fats. Captain... Captain Fats, Barrow. General Liza and Howard. Phony Soprano. And... B.O.L.Z. blob. Some of my recent favourites. So they will all go in the new book, which is, you know, that's months away. Don't let that concern you. Oh, Blimey, look at the time. You don't know what you're talking about, do you? No, very rarely. This says, Hi Nick and Assistant, have you seen the images of the USS Abraham Lincoln

25:52arriving in Thailand? Yeah, it looked like a right rust bucket. Or wrong one. I'll never mind. It'll all come out in the end. It says, what if that is not a visual metaphor of the US underhand's grouper, then I don't know what it is. What is? I'm screwing this up. Sorry about this, Alex. He says also in the last week, he used AI to lie about striking carg island. Blamed us for losing the war, he's claimed to have won and threatened the Falklands, says Alex in with him. Yeah, that boat looked terrible, didn't it? I mean, I would imagine that people on it look pretty bad too. Haven't been cooped up in it all this time. But Donnie doesn't care. Why does Donnie care? Nobody he knows is on that boat. Nobody he knows that has ever met is on that boat. And this is Nick. It looks like Farage has had his international benefits cut. ironic, isn't it? Considering that's what he wanted for society's most vulnerable in this country,

26:54says Edward. I won't make a serious point there, Edward. You sure it fits in on this show? Brighton, hello Joe. Hi, it's good to hear from you. I'm looking forward to tell you what I think. I think the Nigel Farage is the new David Koresh. And it reform should be called the Wackover Form by. Because it's just full of wackos. You go to all these right wing podcasters. They can't find a fault in the pro-Labor does that. But Labour declares its donations. Every time something comes up, they keep on defending them. It's come to a point. It's a no-call. It's a call. Well, I've been saying it for ages about Tecchi about Donald Trump in America. He is running a cult. There's absolutely no doubt about that. All those dinging in America. I love the poorly educated. Well, they keep giving and giving. And I would say that they were the reform are most close in this country to that example.

27:55I mean, because I'm pleased, Nick. Please, I beg you, how can people watch reform councils close their proposal to close old age pensioners, care homes owned by the council and shut down ador education centers? Who use ador education centers? It used to be people who wanted to learn the new trade in the evening. Who is that kind of person, a working class person, or probably middle manager? The only thing they're cutting is going to be the supporters who are voting for them. Well, that seems to be the way. I mean, poor people tend to vote for the parties that are funded by the rich. They vote for the Tories and they vote for reform. The poorer you are, the more likely you are to vote Tory or reform. That's just properly bizarre to me. I'll never be able to understand that. I seriously, seriously, I mean, today Nick Ferrari destroyed armed forage. And you know, James A'Brien is literally ran out of paper. He had no more words left for for art.

28:56He's literally ran out of paper honestly. He ran out of in this, do you have any idea how much paper we got in this building? Loads. Loads who got all those channels. How many of you got those different? Bo loads of paper and he ran out. I can't believe this. Yeah, he ran that word. This is what he said, everything and people. What are people waiting for to see what happened to the Latinos when they start seeing their husbands and cousins and brothers and daughters, after voting Trump? What are you waiting for? Are you waiting for the last care home owned by your council to go before you believe reform? Is the same as Trump? Right. None of the above will make the slightest bit of difference. The people in Clapton are in the top one or two percent of the poorest areas in the country. More of people in Clapton are on PIP and Universal Cr... What are you doing, Joe? Sorry, I'm sorry about that. Sorry, that would be an open-ended kind of Coke. How many? Just one.

29:57Just one. Right. I think it's resisting your efforts. Yeah, carry on. That would be a good one. I forgot what I was talking about now. No, you were talking about most people in Clapton are living the most deprived area. Yes, and so they are most in receipt of PIP and other sort of benefits, which the party that they voted for has determined they want to cut. Who do they think is going to suffer these cuts? Somebody else is the target is always going to eat somebody else's face. If you want to have that worked out, then just look at all those people on the internet crying into their phones in America because Donald Trump has just had one of their relatives arrested at the airport and deported to a country they've never been to. Yeah, but you know what I've read on YouTube on some of these writing channels? Some people will sacrifice their PIP for the greater good. No, I don't believe that. No, seriously, people wrote that and it would even more know people. I tell you what people will do, they will sacrifice other people's PIP and other

31:01assorted benefits for the greater good, but not their own because none of these people think that they think that because they vote for a party that that party somehow knows that they voted for them and will treat them accordingly. That's not how it works. Well, the thing is Nick, you know, the only way Labour can get around this, right? You know, there's other countries in the EU. The main thing is that they're voting and rather take the pain if it means deporting my foreign migrants to a war in the country illegally. I mean, for Labour to play the game, they should just say we're going to follow up the EU countries and detain these young men at the hotels and at the detention center to get exhausted guys in because some of the security guards at some of these hotels are like five for one and they laugh at them. If they really want to play. Well, what do you think they're going to do? Just because they're ex-forces, what are they going to bring their own weapons? No, they're going to talk like grab little mates, you're not leaving.

32:01But if you're not a five-foot one security guard, you know, they laugh at that, then maybe you want some of these videos in YouTube, they're just laughing at the security guard. You'd like five-foot one. Yeah, I'm not sure doubling security is going to make the slides a bit of difference. But anyway, nice talking to you, Joe. Keep thinking. 0345, 6060, 973. This says, did you know that Pepsi advert was written by Charles Dickens? No, I didn't know that. No. Didn't know that. It says, Hi Nick, you're sounding better. Yeah, I'm over it, pretty much. He says, I see the clack-ton gas bags in trouble again with Parliament, but of course, it isn't his fault. Good old-night. Looks like the Donald is trying to start a war in the foreclans now. How many wars has that he started? Best wishes to say is Damien. Damien's on a list. Don't even fly over America to go to somewhere else, Damien. 0345. By the way, you might forget what you've seen, what you've said online about

33:03the Emperor's squeaky tanks. But the internet doesn't forget. And AI can pull all that information up within a millisecond of you presenting your passport at, as you exit your plane. Affirmative. Yeah. Robots know. Let's see now. Ealing. Hello Grace. Hi. Grace. I know this is the survivor selling boring, boring, boring, keytell. What was it? Yeah. Did they have his face on him? No, just the words. But gosh, I mean, the merch I've seen advertised at some of these conferences. Although I'm not at the conferences myself, but you see over the merch there, sharing. And I think that, yeah, he's at least doing some recycling, because he said very similar things about these particular donations, candle, as he said a few weeks ago, when he was trying to defend himself over the last donations candle. On that occasion, he said on GBBs, do you know if I made one sin?

34:09Now, if he actually worth the portip of Christian values, it's claimed to be that he would repent just sin rather than brushing his eye. But he said, if I did made one sin, if I haven't filled in a piece of paper, I've broken no law. I've broken no tax law. I've taken no public money. I don't even own a motor home. And today, he did the motor home thing again. So, at least he's doing recycling of some sort. But I'm wondering how many donations from people overseas. It'll take for him and his fans to stop being so fervently anti-globalist, because they're always complaining about those. Well, that's true. Yes, very good points. But they're quite happy to get donations from around the place. Yeah. I also wondered if being anti-globalist in terms of people being reform fans might just mean being a flatter for, like, free given how anti-science they are with their disdain for climate science. But it's all a bit depressing. And do you think that richer ties sounds like a small child when he refers to net stupid zero, obsessively? It's really childish, yeah.

35:09It's even in infants. Even in how's the comments? Well, yeah, yeah. Because there's a three word phrase, and they think that if they just keep repeating a three word phrase, and it's going to stick with people, and it will get them what they want. I mean, it's, and they'll come up with a cute other three word phrase. I mean, presumably, boring was written three times, boring, boring, boring. Yeah. Right, yeah. It's another three word phrase. I mean, the policy is absolutely stuff full of them. And it's just noise and numbers filling the air, signifying nothing. They're just silly people. And the worst thing about it is, I don't think that they believe what they're saying. They just believe that their fans want to believe it. I was thinking a moment ago when you were saying about how he's copying Trump by loving people to not have enough access to education. The first thing he said when someone heckled during his conference speech earlier today was, this is what a university education gets you. Right. So he's just insinuating that university education is a pejorative,

36:10and that the only thing that would cause a person to oppose him is going to university. And it's kind of concerning that he has no rational arguments, obviously, but he also really just stains people learning. And he's obviously just taking advantage of people who have not had enough access to education. And it's quite upsetting to see how he's manipulating people. Yeah, I don't think they disdain learning. I think that they don't want certain types of people to learn. They're doing the exact same thing as Trump. First of all, you go for the courts. Do you de-legitimize the courts, which he's done with this? I haven't done anything wrong. Why are you people picking on me? Just find me innocent, then we can all move along. And then they pick on the universities, because an education is the enemy. You don't want people knowing things. You just want people to take things verbatim and as read by the dear leader. So... verbatim is the climate change activist group that's exposed to him, and he's not happy about them.

37:10Oh, yeah, well, I miss both. Yeah. But it's just all part of a plan, and you know, science is next. And just follow whatever Donald Trump has done. Pick off the targets that he has picked. And you can make a list. And you can tell exactly what fag-ash and his lot are going to say next. They'll say they're on the side of science. They will say I will find shows that the climate has always changed. You know, and all this nonsense, and I hear it. I'm not sure they will. I don't think they'll say anything positive about science, because they want to make you think that anything that scientists say is questionable, even though... Even if 99.9% of scientists on the planet say one thing, irrelevant of what it is that they're saying, they want you to doubt it, because they will require you to doubt when scientists say something else. That's important to them. Yeah, I think it's very much about just building up resentment, I think,

38:11it's never anything that's particularly positive or constructive. It's just that's get people exercise by making them resent others. Yeah, I'll give you the three word phrase. Winging and whining and moaning. Yeah, that's them. To a T. All right, thanks a lot, Grace. The winging and whining and moaning party. This is absolute touch. Thanks, Nigel, you're the best. Nick says we got Halloween stuff in the shops, or in the shops already. What? It's too early. Halloween stuff. I'm surprised that they've got any room, what, what, what, all the Christmas stuff. It says 9 o'clock, it's pitch blacked up and the bats are out. It's not fair. Yeah, I know. All that complaining we were doing for the hot, hot heat. Now it's gone. It's like last year. Pretty good summer with the heat last year. And then on September the 1st, it's like somebody turned off the lights like that. The way they just changed on a six months. What's a six-prince rendered?

39:13Shut up. I'm pretty, pretty much the same as this year. Weird that. Like, as, because the weather doesn't know what month it is. But the 1st of September, everything changed. And it doesn't look like it's going to go back up that way anytime soon. And I was looking and wistfully at the temperature gauge in my car, as it was about to explode. And it said 66. Blimey, a couple of weeks ago, I was coming in and it was 86. Oh, well, you know me. I never complained. Stop whining. Gabriel and Bo says evening Nick in the light of Channel 4 is under cover sting into Fagation reform. It must be assumed that Farage is considering calling a bi-election and letting the people of Clackton decide where the humidity is accepted and thanked on film for undone nations. Yeah, let the good people of Clackton decide. They should be the decision makers for everything from now on. Hands in the air, who's with me?

40:14Keep them up while I count. Now hands up who disagrees. Well, that's overwhelming. And this says, can you place some ario speed wagon? Of course, which one? Can't fight this feeling or the other one? No, what's the other one? Keep on loving you. Of course it was. Keep on loving you. Keep on loving you. You keep on loving you. What's it going on? I'm forcing you. We've looked in the CD case and it's empty. Somebody's obviously been off with it. You can believe that. 0-345-6060-973. Bo, Gabriel. Oh, my text beat me to the line. Damn it. I was going to try and beat myself on text in that end. Texting what in? Oh, I see that. Calling a biolix and letting the people of Clackton decide. Only the world's smartest people make. Come on. They know what they're doing. Yes, they do.

41:15Well, Richard Tyne, you know what I mean? I'm going to say that. Well, Richard Tyne, what a hypocrite. He has been quoted as saying he loves electric vehicles and his own solar panels. Before reforms started getting fossil fuel donations in sympathy. He was a massive advocate for. Now, is that true? It is. No, generally it is true. In 2021, he's quoting the industry as saying that he loves his electric vehicle car. And his property and his business properties have solar panels on them. Currently. Hmm. I looked it up before I phoned in. All right, here we go. Politics home September 2024. Despite my views on net zero, I do have a Tesla. Oh, well, of course, of all the electric vehicles that are available yet have a Tesla. Yeah, there you go. Just check that one in. Why not? Indeed. So, I mean, it's been a big week through reform, isn't it?

42:15I mean, it's almost breathtaking. Loose pub talk. It's more like private members club. If they're not hanging around in pubs, I mean, what were they doing in those, those meetings? They're in May fair doing all of those. It very much reminds me of Donald Trump. It's not loose pub talk. It's like a room talk. You regret them by the word. By the words of cash. Grab them. Very strongly. They let you do it when you're running your own party. And obviously, you know, we can tell that I actually feeling the heat. When he says that his age of 10 to 15 years, I suddenly contracted. That's like things to do when I sometimes phone call for a client that me as the photographer, I have all the dealings of the company on day one. No, I don't know. I have a lot of things to do. I have all the dealings of the company on day one. No, they were his closest age. I never met them. I didn't know anything about them.

43:15And I really have no idea who they are. Exactly. And then obviously, you know, they're having a oyster. So please allow me to just go and add G-neck. But they have to shut out the past. Shut them out of the party. Right. The horrible. Terrible. But there was a zero-old lady who bought on Facebook Marketplace a pair of 15 pound dentures. Oh, what a day. Been in somebody else's mouth. No, well, I know that fact actually, but they did come in a box. The trouble is they look like Haribo teeth in her mouth. She's uploaded a picture and she looks. Gosh, it's the worst thing was she asked for a refund and he got declined. Well, I would think so. Yeah, you can't have a refund on pants or teeth. No, I don't know. She got a receipt either. There's one more thing regarding reform and it was that 13 year old Pips Creek. The head of the what was it? What actually County Council viewers on the reform TV today.

44:17And he was going on about how the liberal left socialite socialists were rather spending the money on themselves than on you. I the reform voted. Right. So they're just schools. Like what are they wanting to spend their money on? It doesn't help the country. They just put a socialism. Frittering is her way on libraries and street lamps. How dare I make that? Thanks a lot. Gabriel, keep your eyes peeled. O345, 6060, 973. This says Nick, I switched to Fag-Ason's speech off. All I heard beforehand was forced cheering. It only goes to prove the empty vessels make the loudest noises. It's really good to see that man of the people, Tetshi Fag-Ason loves nothing more than drawing a few quid at a coot's, you know, the people's bank. And treating himself to six oysters washed down with a pint of stout and a champagne top. Well, that's so totally him. He's much more the Savoy than the Dog and Duck.

45:21It says, Richard O Sullivan, another part of my childhood gone. Richard O Sullivan. Richard O Sullivan. Oh, oh, oh, the actor who did, uh, write that show that was in the 70s, whatever that was called. Yeah, I'd never watched it, but I know who he is. Yeah. Well, I had to make the news to you, uh, whatever your name is. Not on my screen. All of the people that we grew up with who were 20 or 30 years older than we are, they're all about to shuffle off the end of life's conveyor belt. We are about to say a, a, a, a cherry buy-by to the lot of them. Bye-bye. Yeah, and that's the TV stars and the film stars and all of those rockers. None of whom have treated themselves very well. If they're on the regiment of vitamins now, it's a little bit late.

46:21And they're going to start coming thick and fast. And we're going to get upset because there's a lot of big, big names who are just about clinging on. I put out a newsletter to the subscribers today. And I was talking about Roger Doltry. Roger Doltry out of the who? Lock it low! You know, hold it. It's 82 years old. 82. That is hard to believe, isn't it? 82. Still sounds great, by the way. And I was going on about, well, you'd have to read the newsletter. If you are a subscriber, then it will have been put into your inbox automatically by a robot. Correct. It's not the only thing that you get if you subscribe to Nick Abbott, the whole show, plus. You get a extra show and extra show, be a better way of putting it. You get the Friday and Saturday night shows, add free as podcasts, plus an extra show on Monday with all the messages that I couldn't get through at the weekend.

47:21Let me see how many of 13 pages already. You must be kidding. 13 pages. That's ridiculous. I haven't done an hour yet, and there's 13 pages of messages to get through. So all of the messages that I couldn't get through, they'll be, you know, assuming they're appropriate, they'll be on the Monday show, the special show that comes out on a Monday for subscribers, plus all of the news stories that I couldn't get through as well. And the ones I've got today include, but are not limited to, VIP mobile signals at festivals. JD Vance says stuff happens. Cars. A lot of stories about cars. Interesting ones. Food shortages. Do you like food? M-O-D spending? Um, Chemie Badenock. You know, Chemie Badenock, don't you? Yes, that's her. And some more about Tecchi Fagash. So those are the stories that I have today, where I probably won't get through.

48:24They'll come out on a Monday on this special show as part of the subscription, which is called Nick Abbott, the whole show, plus. And as well as the Friday and Saturday night shows as ad free podcasts, plus the extra show on a Monday, you get also a newsletter, straight to your inbox on a Friday, wipes up the week's news, launches us into the weekend. I think you'll love it. It's called Nick Abbott, the whole show, plus. And you can find it on both Global Player and the LBC app, both of which are free from the app store. Global Player, the new LBC app, ask for Nick Abbott, the whole show, plus. And I appreciate your attention to this matter. Thank you. This says, hi, Nick, if you consider replacing your car with something more reliable, like a bus pass. It says, you know, most speedometers have a plus minus tolerance of at least two mile an hour, right? If your car says 20, you could be doing 18 or 22. They're just not that accurate.

49:27It's time to trade in that old banger and buy an electric car. Much more sensibles than Dan in Santerstown. Dan, I'm way ahead of you. I've been looking at the price of an electric car and having looked at it very strongly, I have realized that I can't afford one. So I might buy a second hand one, which will probably promptly break down on me. And I can't stand him. 0345, 6060, 973. This is high, Nick, just exactly what will it take for you to decide you need a new car, just saying it says Vicki and Cumbria. Well, I've only had two cars in my life, apart from one brief couple of months period where I made an accident and bought a car in error. I've got rid of it almost straight away, but I've only really had two cars and I've kept them both for about 10, 15 years, something like that, each.

50:28Which is, I know it's a pretty weird car history. Most people my age have had many, many, many cars, but I've only ever had two. So it just seems like a big thing to change them, but I do appear to be running this one into the ground, which I could just keep spending money on it to fix it. But at what point do you say, you know, this is nuts. You should be spending coverage. I've just dropped two grand on it. That's a little bit complaining, didn't it? Stop winding. Yeah, just drop two grand on it. Can you believe that to fix a problem that they that I took it into the garage and I said, you know, it's overheating and it's telling me it's going to blow up. Please fix it. Pretty, please, we sugar on top. And they said, oh, we've got no idea about that. But we have found 2,000 pounds worth of stuff in addition to anything that you thought. And we'll fix that instead. So now it's got to go back in and they'll charge me another 220 pound just to look at it. But these are the same people who looked at it before and they couldn't find the problem.

51:35And I've looked at electric cars. It seems like every person in London is driving around in one of those new Mercedes that looks like a supository. Probably it looks that way in order to slip through the air more efficiently. But they always look like that to me. And you look at the price and you think, how can anybody, how can anybody afford that almost everybody in London. Everyone is in one of those brand new SUVs because apparently electric cars only come in one size huge either that or they're in, you know, like a Mercedes or some souped up BMW or something. And who the hell are all these people that can afford these cars? And I know that they haven't bought them that they're on the never never. But the never never costs a boat load as well. You know, they want like 13 grand as a deposit and then 700 pound a month. And after four years, you still don't own it.

52:40I just don't understand the economics of it. I really don't. How is anybody affording buying a new car whether they release it or not? Don't get it. Who are all these people? I want their names and addresses. This says Foreign Secretary plus Defense Secretary on the Folkland Islands stirring rhetoric but just mere words. What will they PM AB and the Labour government actually do if Argentina were to invade the Folkland Islands again? Where are the UK Defence Forces today to defend the Folkland Islands as Rick in London? Yeah, I'm a bit confused about how it's hours because it's a couple of hundred miles from Argentina, but it's 8,000 miles from here. How is it hours? Just because we bumped into it a couple of hundred years ago, no end of country's bumped into the Folkland Islands a couple of hundred years ago. France did, I think Spain did, Argentina did and who knows before that. So how is it hours? Because we say so.

53:42I think that's it, isn't it? We see something we like and then we say so and that's the end of it. We're British, dammit. Plus there's oil, so don't forget that. Oil. Ding. Ding, Ding. We have a world dryer in the changing rooms at the leisure centre around my way. I can attest that it does go on and on and on. Much better than the Dyson Airblade but not as good as the Mitsubishi Jet Tower says Jamie from Gateshead. Those things that you have to put your hand in the slot and it blows water at you either side. I hate those. I hate them with a passion. I just won't use them. I'll just dry my hands on my shirt. Not my trousers because that looks like you've had an accident but I do it on my shirt rather than use those. It's like an envelope. You put your hand in just, I mean apart from anything else, they look absolutely filthy down there. I mean what kind of, I bet this germs down there that science hasn't even invented yet.

54:53And yes, I did say invented. It says, it says, Farage is like an evil Mr Ben. In what way? What like he dresses up a lot? Right, OK gotcha. Him and Mr Blobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Forever donning other people's work clothes except in Farage's case, those people only work at the Henley-Rogatta and the stock market. Just those two places. Greenwich, hello Lawrence. Good evening, can you hear me all right? Yes. The gaping toad and his address this evening. Yeah. You know you'll have quite a lot of people talk about this tonight so I try and if it was a lot just and I did feel quite unwell after it. So it was entertaining in a morbid way. Yeah, there was a point. Did you? No, I did not. There was a.

55:56Lawrence, this is a really bad signal. Are you? Are you in a room made entirely of iron? I'm in a room made entirely of bricks. Bricks. Oh, well, that's your first mistake. Is that any better? Yeah, it's a little bit better. There was a point in speech. I can't remember what exactly he said, but he reached peak preposterousness for me when he was being brazenly flippant about how if he were to win? If MPs and I assume he was including his own MPs because he didn't really specify if MPs can't deliver, he'll just get rid of them immediately and replace them. Yeah, because they have a big, a big pool of talent over there. A form. I mean, he lost two of his top team already. He'll just replace you. Just throw them away like a used tissue. Why would you want to subject yourself to that pain? I have boggles in mind. It really does.

56:59I think that it's the British in you coming out there, Lawrence. I think that in within British people, there is a wide streak of masochism. We love a bit of it. Oh, you said it. You said it. Now you get a little bit animated, Lawrence, and you're making me uncomfortable. In the workplace, and I'm going to have to go, but thanks a lot, mate. He's very absurd. This says, I feel like the people of Clackden will be getting another bi-election soon. I wish it was a bi-bi-election. A bi-bi-election. He says, the next time we're going to speeding ticket, I'll be telling the police to ask the good people of Clackden, whether I did it or not. That's a good idea. We should let the people of Clackden decide everything in this country from now on. Who's with me? This says, I see that since Farriage, that's how it's spelled, hasn't had a milkshake donation for a couple of years now. He's on the shampoo.

58:01He says, TaxiMik. And Farriage said he doesn't believe in biased inquiries, and only the people can judge him, which is why his own party will be investigating their conduct, says Paul. They're all about, I will be the judge of whether I have done any wrong. Oh, well, okay. Wouldn't that be nice? If we all had that benefit. I am the decider, he said, you know, like George W. Absolutely. He was the decider, and Nigel is the decider. First, the people of Clackden decide, and then if Nigel likes the decision that the people of Clackden have come to, then he will be the decider. Mother's head for a low, Jeff. I am Nick. Jeff. What's, how do you spell this guy's name? Don't name Argentina. Millay, M-I-L. Is X, is it?

59:02Somewhere. No. Is first name. Oh, his first name. I can't recall. Millay, M-I-L-A-E, or something. Okay. What are you asking me for? The internet knows. Oh, that's true, but we don't get it up this neck. Don't you? There's nothing on it. I wouldn't bother. Anyway, he's banned. Is he? Yeah, we banned it from a grocery other way. That's a job on it. No X is, by the way. It's a J and a V. Very high scoring points on Scrabble, but no X. Is it? Oh, okay. I might be able to get it on the fax machine. Oh, the fax machine, yeah. I'll send you a telegram, Jeff. Anyway, he's banned from the goose. Is he? Well, because of the, the, the Rayba, the, Rayba,

1:00:03the Saber rattling or the Rayba sattling, one of the two. Well, he turned up at the White Dose and it, it was, it was like a circus run out. I mean, two clones, I mean, he looks like that clone. Yeah. No X has, there's, there's a couple of hair don'ts for sure. Yep. Well, did you see, the, I think, the United Nations, it showed it, the heat from this, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, yeah, which is, which is developing in your approaches across East and Pacific. Yeah. it looks pretty horrendous to me. Sea temperatures be an absolutely critical. We all in this together or not, it goes wrong to us. But you living in Wales, you'll be more in it than the rest of us, for sure. Yeah. Well, you know that the, you know that the, you know, the thing, I think, is all you love and it is.

1:01:05Look, you know this, this is all in it. Are you okay? Yes, I'm fine now. It's the, it's moved north. The, it is. Yeah. What is the, the, the, the, the Gulf Stream. Oh, that, that, like, call it what the hell you like, right? It's got about 50 different names, but it's the movement of the Caribbean heat up through the north Atlantic, which is. Oh, the Mary Dional overturning circulation. Whatever that is. Yeah. Yeah. Sea temperatures. Right. This is absolutely critical. Do you know, do you know if all the ice in the north and the south falls melted? What would have been the scenic? No, it might about that. What would happen to the penguins? Well, the, well, anyway.

1:02:06The sea would rise about, I don't know, but if the, if the, if the thweights glassy at melt, so I think the sea level will rise about three meters, something like that, which will mean that almost every major metropolis on earth will become unlivable, which would be something of a problem. That would put a, put a kink in our days. And the, I forgot what the rest of it was. Well, it's going to make another point. I can't remember what it was. The jet stream has moved north. OK, during the summer. That's why we have this. Yeah. Pull the air up from the south. That's right. And it's all to do with, we're all in this together. So when taste says, oh, this will be good. We can have sparkling English wine from the glass. Yeah. We, we, we, we, we've got, we've got a destiny in front of us. Yeah. That is not pleasant.

1:03:06You, you're doing an absolutely clownish thing to say. I mean, if our temperatures are getting such that we'll be able to, to grow the wines that are currently being grown in France and Spain, well, what, what does that imply about what's going to happen in France and Spain? Because we get a lot of, you know, even if we do stock the production up to maximum of the wine in this country, it's still not going to make up for what the France and Spain make in Italy and all of those places, which are going to be like a barren desert. If, if we're going to get there, whether, what, whether will they get Africa's? Well, it's going to cause huge movements of humanity. Exactly. It's going to, it's going to be, it's going to be far worse than anything, you know, than Brexit. It's going to be there to be worse than World War III. Yeah, because it's going to be everywhere. No one will get away. And, and it will create, um, parts lands in one area and flood lands in another.

1:04:07What will be absolutely certain is that the weather won't be certain anymore. And that's why we live where we do is because we rely on the, the weather being reliable. And when it becomes unreliable, well, we can't live our lives anymore. These, uh, comfortable, modern, uh, lifestyles that we've fashioned for ourselves, that's right out the window when the weather becomes unreliable. Exactly. And, and those who deny this are going to put us all in it. And we're all in this together. We can't escape it. And they are denying it because they're in the, in the pockets of the petrochemical giants. Yeah. That's true. And what really blows my mind is that the people who run petrochemical companies that they presumably have families, I would imagine some of them do, do they really not care what happens to their kids? I guess not. I guess they just, you know, all other considerations are secondary when it comes to a giant tower of money.

1:05:08That's the only explanation I can find. All right. Well, I'll see you at the bar, Jeff. Thanks a lot, mate. Oh, three, four, five, six, I'm, unless I'm still banned. Still banned from the good, the goose and cook. Very upset. Hey, hey, you're T I R. Tina Annabelle says, hi, Nick, did you see Farage get into trouble on his first day back by trespassing, walking on the roof of the house's apartment without permission to make a video? Why don't rules apply to him? He made a video. Oh, Strut, he's not going on only fans. Is he put it away? Nice. Nobody wants to see that. Oh, three, four, five, six, oh, nine, seven, three. Bell size park. Hello, Judy. Hello. Two things to find me. Yes. First of all, because I've had such help from your lovely distance with problems that I've had, I was just into John from Somerset about his problems with the long trousers and the

1:06:12long shirt. He has, he has very, very short limbs, sad. Well, you can buy elastic sleeve on bands. Yeah, I mentioned that to him. The whole damn bang glasses. Arm band garsers. Yes. Yeah, I mentioned that. I, the only person I've ever seen where those is my old granddad used to wear them all the time. But I, I guess to keep his sleeves out of the mud when he was tending his allotment. Well, my, my dad used to wear them as well. And also you can get iron on hamming tape for doing the bottom of your trousers. That's cheating. Isn't it? Why is it cheating? He just needs to shorten his trousers easily. Yeah, but don't you sew them hamming tape? It's called hamming tape and you iron it on. Yeah, that doesn't sound right. That, that won't work. Do you get it wet and it'll be flapping around your ankles, surely? I don't know.

1:07:12I've never tried them. I'm just trying to be helpful. I'm only trying to get back to life when men too, because I'm at hell. And then something completely different. Can you stand by the window, Judy, because this is a terrible line. Oh, is there any best in the house? Perhaps. Well, the other thing was I've heard that Simon Cowell is trade more than a single person. I'm just a bit of an expression. Like what? So, um, things like it's a yes for me. Or it's a no for me on, um, is it the extractor? Is trade marking the words yes and no? Well, it is trade marking things like it's a yes for me. Or I didn't like it. I loved it. So I'm wondering, are you going to, because you have things you say checking my new weight. Yeah.

1:08:12And then you hum the girl from the pandemic and things like that. So I just wondered whether you're going to follow his example. I'm going to copyright this entire show. And if I ever say any of the things that I say, I'm going to sue me for a billion dollars. Well, no, I just want to, I mean, I don't understand how he can do it. But if he can, then I thought I wondered whether you might be doing that at all. Well, you know, Fred is there in short his legs or was it to centuries? I don't know. What one of those dancers? A different, a better grey bull who you want the paradox because you're too young. Of course I've heard of her. Oh, was she in short her legs for about a million dollars? A million dollars, yeah. About a million years ago. Yeah. So if she can do that, then, then, um, what's his name? Simon Cowell. Simon Cowell can do the same about his, you know, his unique and special talent,

1:09:13which is to say yes and no. Well, apparently, it's been registered. Yeah, okay. Well, the best of luck with him, the suing people for saying those phrases. Because I know years ago, there were loads of comics that had little catch phrases that they used. I don't think they have a registered them. I don't know. Um, anyway, it was just a thought. Right. Okay. Well, keep thinking, Judy, promise me you'll do that. Yes. I'll do that. All right. Cheers, my dear. Oh, three, four, five, six, oh, nine, seven, three. Yeah, I've got no idea of the, what does surprise me is that that stupid show is still on television. Has Britain got talent? No. No, I've seen that show. I saw that show about 20 years ago and they didn't have any talent. Then how have they still got the nerve to tell us that they've, that they're still going through the talent? They're ain't none. I've seen it with my own eyeballs.

1:10:16This says reforms investigation into itself will commence as soon as a foreign donor can be found to pay for it through a relative. And that is the thing that a, a, a wannabe leader, I was going to say, Dick Taser, but you know, I want to be a dictatorial leader, would like the least to be made fun of. Can't stand it. I mean, Donald Trump is giving up running the country and he just is using America as a weapon against people who have been mean to him. That's pretty much what occupies him all day long, apart from his stupid, ballroom and his stupid triumphal arch triumphal. What's the triumph to against? It can't even be Iran. Don't be rude. Triumph for arch. What for? Hello, Simon. Oh, happy Friday. No, happy Friday, Simon.

1:11:18Oh, I thought it was going to be a quiet news week. So I was going to talk about my greenhouse, but I want to hear about your greenhouse. Well, well, I told you about my greenhouse about three months ago, said I had it delivered. Oh, yeah. And this will eventually got the glass part this week. You had a glass greenhouse delivered as a flat pack. Yes. So I told you, but you won't remember several months ago that I refused to pay the 500 pound insulation fee. I'm too tight. I would now pay a thousand pounds. So somebody's a government undo everything that you've done up to this point. Yeah. Yes, you work all week to then dread the weekend where you've now got to look at it. I've had a crater glass in the living room for months. I was thinking about decorating it for Christmas. Yeah. But then last week I decided to put some glass on it and I broke a piece every time I'd put a metal clip in.

1:12:21Yeah. Two other clips would fly out. I had to apologise to the neighbors for the up lean language. Honestly, it's horrendous. Don't ever do it. Don't you don't need a greenhouse? Well, the thing is every time somebody charges extra for you to put it together or extra for say you're moving house. And you can buy boxes and be stunned at how much a box costs. They cost a fortune. You would not believe it. If you haven't moved lately and had to buy, you know, 50 or 100 boxes, then you have got absolutely no idea how much they actually cost. It's incredible. And then they will put on top of that the price of actually packing your stuff away. And you think you're on stuff. Yeah. And you think you think no way I'm not going to pay anybody to do that. And then you've regretted it for every single second that you're there taping and taping and taping and spitting right stuffing and just just just pay the extra.

1:13:27Because I watched I thought no, we don't need to pay for moving. No. And then when I watched a single man pick up an Eames chair and walk it out over on his shoulder down the stairs and into the into a glory, I thought actually this was money worth spent. Definitely. I clearly did learn my lesson with the greenhouse. What kind of an Eames chair we're talking about? Because there's ones there are ones that a child could move comfortably. Well, this one is quite heavy. Right. OK. But the one with the first stall. Oh, that one. The Frazier crane Eames chair. Yeah. Yeah. In the same color as well. Right. Do you find it comfortable? Because I've sat in those and I found them deeply uncomfortable. Yeah. I don't. He fall asleep. It's a phrase you said. It was the best engineered chair in the world. Quite possibly. And fall asleep. I wake up with a really quite bad name. Yes. They're not very comfortably made, which is odd for Eames chairs because they're, I can't remember what it's called.

1:14:28The. The cost of fortune. Yeah. Because they're very, very well engineered. So he's right about the engineering part, but only some of them are excellent to sit in. And some of the some of them are super. Look at it. The best way to use a chair is to sit on the sofa and look at it. And look at it. Yeah. Exactly right. Yes. I, you know, this week I read, I just changed subject. I read that Paul Einer Richey was taken into ITU after his concert this week and I immediately checked your podcast to see if you'd mentioned him. You cannot pin that on me and Carol McGiffin. No, yet. No, yet. But, but then I did start to think maybe this curse that you have, yeah, doesn't just affect celebrities, maybe affects mechanical cars, maybe you've done this to yourself. Oh, that's a good point.

1:15:29By, I think we should let the people look clacked and decide. What? I think that I think I've had enough. Right. Right on the right. Yeah, that's right. You thank you people have clacked them, but you have delighted as enough. Yeah. All right. Good to meet you Simon. Thanks for that. It's he was referring to me and Carol McGiffin. We do a podcast called What's Your Problem with Nick and Carol? Oh, right. Yeah. And we have a history of killing people. Oh, right. Yeah. Mealy by mentioning them on the air and it's become more of a coincidence. And a little bit more terrifying because they're multiple times now. We have mentioned somebody on the air and they've died within the week. Now, these aren't people that we would normally have mentioned, you know, in the ordinary course of events. They were sort of a bit left field for us on that podcast because it's a helpful podcast. It's a podcast in which we help people because we're all about the help, aren't we, Carol?

1:16:30Yeah. But we have to stop mentioning celebrities because otherwise we're just going to select two through the lot of them. Everybody that you've ever heard of will be, will be, you know, recently expired because of us. But if you have the nerve and you want to hear something that will make you laugh because we certainly sent each other off, then it is called What's Your Problem with Nick and Carol in which the delightful Carol McGiffin and I try to solve it. So people's problems while laughing like drains got a problem, send it to Nick and Carol at global dot com, n i c k a n d c a r o l at global dot com and prepare to be totally satisfied. Ask for it by name on the internet near you. What's your problem with Nick and Carol? It blows my mind Nick. It really does my nothing. Yes, my not to. This is Nick. Can you please read out what the UK legal definition of entrapment is? You will find that Nigel Farage is lying about that too.

1:17:32What the investigative journalists did was not entrapment. It was self-snitching. Well, yes, as a matter of fact, I can. I can give you that information one moment please. Entrapment is a legal concept where a law enforcement officer or state agent induces a person to commit a crime that they would not have otherwise committed. Now there's a difference in English and our American law and the application of the UK law, English law does not recognize entrapment as a formal defense. So take from that what you will. Hazel, me. Hello, Della. Hello, Nick. Hi. Can I just say that Paul Simon before the break time and get someone round to do your green house? It's got to do it. Don't you? Oh, Paul loves. The problem with that is that once you've once you or another tradesperson has started a

1:18:36job, other trades people don't want to continue it. Of course. Yeah. Oh, Paul guy. I really feel from always do it. Always. I don't buy stuff because I don't like accumulating. But always your time is the most valuable thing. Do you know what can I tell you? Do you know the law of diminishing returns? You're supposed to get, you know, once you've done something a number of times you're meant to get bored of it. And I never cease to be bogged or buy home delivery for the food. You know, like when the same free span came yesterday and they must think I'm a nutter because I can't. I'm just so amazed. This is so brilliant. And I keep a pile of fibers by the door. Well, not by the door, but I always have one for the because I mean, I'd really give them the tenants to be honest, but they think I was really nuts. But I just cannot believe that someone does that boring job packs it all up, takes it to your door. I mean, but they're not the ones that pack it up. They're just the ones that take it to your door. So you are exactly.

1:19:37It is more complicated, but hang on a minute. So you it's essentially like you're in a restaurant and you tip the waiter, but all the waiter has done is bring you the food to your table. Something that happened before that, well, none of those poor people get to tip it all. Nick, don't dole of guilt on to me. Come on. See, there's some poor bloke or woman sexist who's strafe sitting around a supermarket in the middle of the night is trying to work out whether you want a packet of tomatoes or just one tomato. And you know, they're out of pineapple yoghurt. So can they change that? Can they substitute that for a mobile phone? You know, they've got a lot of decisions to make. It's both giving people jobs as well. So that's quite good. Yeah. Yeah. So another thing is that you can go to the other thing. I would never do that. I mean, don't you miss giving your vegetables a bit of a squeeze?

1:20:41Now, let me think about that. No, no, no. No? I mean, I would assume that the person doing the packing is going to give me the worst of what they've got just to get rid of it. No, because then you won't go back. I think they tried that before. And then people said the same thing. Same with the expiry dates. I always fish around the back of the shelf for the expiry date that is a month away, rather than the ones at the front of the shelf when the expiry date was last week. Well, yeah, do you know what? I'm so lazy. I'll just get another delivery. I would. I think it's a surprise when you tip them because I would imagine that most people don't. They're just getting embarrassed. They're British, you know, so they can get embarrassed. They're British. Are you sure? No, the delivery ones are. But the ones from St. I'm kind of surprised about that. I didn't think they're British people did those jobs. I thought we'd rather starve today.

1:21:42They definitely do. But the only thing is the young ones when you give them a five, they're like, what's this brand-of-art? Snatch it back out of their hands and give them a clip around a year. They use something called Venmo, I think. That's how they use. I don't know. Anyway, yeah. No idea what Venmo is. I think any of them asks me for it. They get nothing. Nothing. Well, the other thing was, well, I've got two. I think so. And Roger Doughtry you mentioned earlier. I went to see him. It must have been 80 something at the time, a couple of years ago at the Albert Hall. Oh, yeah. Because you know what? Just really struck me was the third last one they played was won't get fooled again. And I thought how amazing the still body of work be that that is the third. Well, I was going to say that's not the that's not the final track. What was the last one? Boba Riley. Oh, right. Boba Riley. Right. Yeah. And I mean, wasn't even my generation, but there's so many.

1:22:44It really was. It was, yeah, but it's still going quite strong, not as bad as Paul McCartney, but he's still not in the back. No, no. No, Roger can still sing. No doubt about that. You don't care. Roger can still sing. Mick can still sing. That last album of his was great. Well. And there's some, there's a new Who Live album. I mean, it is. It was from a performance that was quite a while ago, but they did it with an orchestra in the Eden project down in Cornwall. And, um, oh, there's some good stuff on that. I have to have a listen. Um, but I've got one. I'll, well, a couple of other things. And there was a, um, a protestor at the thing this evening with Farage. And he said, did you hear about this? He went. Pauling, Pauling. Tell your jingle. Yeah. Yeah. I think he said, I think, I think he, I think he thinks that it's amusing. Pauling. Yeah. Not when it comes out of his dog. Not really. No.

1:23:44And the last thing that the pinnacle of my is, um, now Grace said quite rightly that next stupid zero is stupid. I've got a antidote for it. Um, it's voting for reform. And I call it pot noodle politics. And it's this because like the pot noodle, um, it's nasty and dirty and it's scratchy niche that you have like with pot noodles, it's hunger and, uh, reform it's hatred of immigrant. Um, it's really simple and easy. Um, and like with pot noodles, the beast one is really nice. Um, it's really bad for you. Um, if you eat too many. And also the easiest way to get someone to eat a pot noodle, do you know what it is? Um, tell them they can't have any pot noodle. Exactly. And that's like when you tell people not to pay reform, the first thing they're going to do. Right. So yeah, you're not as impressed. I was really expecting a round of applause.

1:24:44But you just look quite indiscretive. Yeah. I'm, I'm more concerned about what it is that you just said about pot noodles, which is a trade name. Um, can I say, have I done it again? I'm sorry. Can I say for absolute clarity that this show does not believe that pot noodle is nasty and dirty and bad for you? I apologize. I mean, in a generic way, not at all. And it's absolutely delicious to be honest. Mm-hmm. And you exactly, yeah. It is a food marketing sensation. It actually is. It is. It's one of the most remarkable successes in world food. It is absolutely fantastic. Absolutely. And let's watch it. Have you took time for just one quick thing? Go on in. Um, cars. I got rid of mine about 10 years ago. And to be honest, are the only thing I need a car for is going to the tip. Everything else can be delivered. But you, you live kind of near London. I guess that you're about west London area. I'm guessing.

1:25:44But there's loads of buses and trains and, you know, London transports are good. And then you can always get, they used to be the zip car, which I really like. But I think they've got enterprise and still. But you can always hire one. And I really try it because I heard that, you know, Cassie Newman, you know her? No. But she's on channel four and you don't think she's on Sky now. I mean, she's a big presenter. And I'm pretty sure she said that she got rid of her car. Now she just gets a bus. I mean, if you're in London, it's like. Yeah, but I bet she doesn't finish work at one o'clock in the morning. Why don't they give you a cab? I don't deserve a cab, apart from anything else. Have you heard this show? Oh, and second, you know, never mind. All right. Okay. I'll speak to that a good time to ring off the text for him. All right. Thanks a lot, Della. Putting those in the soup. Not the pot noodle.

1:26:45Yeah, I mean, I have thought about giving up a car. Of course, the kids don't want a car. I mean, you know who doesn't want a car? The kids. Not remotely interested. There was big car news. I might lay that on you in a moment. I've got plenty to get through and not enough time in which to get through it. Yeah, so she takes her car to the tip. That sounds like a good idea. Maybe I'll take my car to the tip. And leave it there. That'll teach it. Mess with me. A big second monkey now. Yeah, that's what we're dealing with here. This says, just tried saying investigative. Oh, I made it. If you don't think about it, then you can, uh, uh, you know, pronouncing it is easy. From the top, just tried saying investigative. I did it again. And only managed it very slowly. And when I emphasized the A as in invest, it worked. It worked. Easy peasy says die. Well, I'd remember that. That's one of those words that trips me up all the time.

1:27:47Invested to get it. Oh, I did it again. Wow. I feel like a certain individual who knows words. I'm very highly educated. I know words. I have the best words. Yeah, he has the best words. And I have the best words. And there's no need for any investigative journalists to work out whether that's true or not. I do. That's three times. East Yorkshire. Hello, Mike. Hi, Nick. How are you? Good. Thanks. Good. Good. Um, yeah, couple of bits and pieces about reform. Um, when Torres did his speech today, he touched on the health of the Lord's. And he came up with two solutions to deal with the House of Lords. Yes. One with Bami, but the whole got a version of that. So the other one was to flood it with with all the Lords so that his legislation would fly through. Yeah. But it hasn't thought this out because it would need to appoint 800 to get a majority and to get 800.

1:28:49It has to appoint a thousand because we know what happens from when he appoints counselors. Some resign because we don't know what we're doing. Some resign because people go through the media. So it has to appoint a thousand Lords. Some resign because they. Yeah, some resign because they can't find their way into the room. You know, all sorts of reasons. But there's been no, well, the night. The channel for release this documentary, which is completely knocked off the news round. What's Muhammad's there? You said about the Somali and. And, Councillor Lee, they're who want to take over Stammer's constitution. They seem to pull that she dare have the. Tempority to want to be an MP. I just don't understand these. The people who are. I don't know if I want the strength. The people that are so adamant about a certain type of person not being allowed into this country.

1:29:52And they want to line them up on the tarmac. And they want to send them up the steps to the plane. And they want to fly them out of here to Rwanda or anywhere else they don't care. Do they really think that the people that they are trying to appeal to? If they were directing traffic on that tarmac that they would say, Ah, not you, Zeeer, you, sir. Pull you out of the crowd. Not you. They're not going to be allowed into the people. So the same with pretty Patel and you know, all those people who seem to be desperately keen on getting a certain type of individual out of the country. Do they really think that the people that they are trying to appeal to would would make the difference between them and those that they would have exported. Deported. It seems that you said it was quite happy to welcome Zeeer for. He's a very lucky guy. He's a very lucky guy. And he basically came to UK. Then he based his business in Gibraltar.

1:30:53Then he is our species stable for our expense. But he's OK. And he was an MP. Well, he's from with this woman from Stammer. He probably has the kind of math skills that she doesn't. And one, two, two, three, six million. Oh, so close. There was a bit of news about Trump, but haven't got much publicity this week. He has an uncle with the chief officers of the American oil companies. And he asked them to lower the pump prices of petrol and diesel because of the, because of the coming midterm. Yeah. Now that's typical Trump. But the answer was amazing. What they said to him was, they did say anything about Iran. They said, one of the reasons gas prices are so high is that the government forces us to blend fossil fuels with biofuels.

1:31:55If you change the legislation, we could cut prices. Now how cynical is that? Because that makes world CO2 problem even worse. And gives them the chance to sell more fossil fuels because they don't have to mix it with biofuels. And every one millions of people would have to read that back out because they've been designed to run on the blend. Yeah, that's the, what do you call it? E, is it E10 and E5, something like that? I'm forever standing at the pump, putting a petrol in my useless car, trying to remember whether it's E5 or E10. That's why it keeps threatening to blow up. I'm putting in the wrong stuff. Well, yeah, but I mean, I was cynical. The debt telling me, it's because you invaded Iran, don't you? Yeah. And I said, oh, no, you make us blend stuff because you're trying to make us a little bit greener. Right. And it wouldn't mean the slightest bit of difference if he said, okay, you can go ahead and do that.

1:32:58You can, you can make cars run on coal. You can't make any difference. They would still be coining in the same amount of money because to lose a single solace of e-penny is not in their DNA. So I mean, I would imagine they were all thinking, no, no, no, no, no, but they said maybe. And even if he says, yeah, okay, it can be just petrol from now on. They still won't lower their prices because they're making too much money. Yeah, it's not. And he's in touch with us this week that the American oil companies now control them as well and oil 100%. They've got these deals through. How many it just goes on the normal. It does. Yes. And I wonder if people in the future, assuming that there is a future and assuming that he does at some point leave power, although I really don't think that he's going to do that at the end of his current term. I just wonder whether there will be some sort of reckoning and I very much doubt it. He just seems to be one of those people who gets away with absolutely everything.

1:34:05Yeah, like someone over here who's named that with that. But so last bit make potatoes. You mentioned potatoes. I've been watching the start of the potato harvest this week. And the ones that are lifting at the moment of potatoes that were in really dry conditions and died early because you can't look potatoes to the skins of that. They need to have stopped growing for a couple of weeks. Otherwise the skins robots. There's only the ones that died early. And the sample that's come off is tiny. They are really, really small potatoes. The yield is really poor at the moment. So potatoes are going to be very expensive. All some of the crops that are still green and growing fast. And we do the typical samples out of them and they're pretty good. What are the properties that are fairly well, I don't really mind about potatoes. Just as long as there's chips and crisps to go around, then that's fine by me.

1:35:06But if you want to be because you're going to be struggling this winter, get to meet many big potatoes. Well, okay, then there won't be much food about it for certain people who are right about current alarming conditions out there. So I'll talk about that in a while. Thanks a lot, Mike. Chips and crisps are going to be in short supply. You'll be able to eat cabbage though. This says, I wonder if you've heard that if you put how old is the tangerine toddler into Google, it brings up Trump's age. It also gives the same result to many of his nicknames. I just thought it would entertain you if you looked it up. Thank you for your attention to this matter. It says Lewis in Bolton. Thank you. Appreciate it, Lewis. No, I did not know that. But I bet as soon as the people in Google find that out, they'll be cutting that out straight away. Because they seem to be keen to bend the knee to whatever the tangerine toddler says.

1:36:07They change their maps just because he wrote with a Sharpie on a map that looked like a place map in a burger joint. And he changed it from Lake Ontario to Lake America and Google went along with it. If you look at it in this country, I don't think it did because they still have the Gulf of Mexico. If you a British Google client, but in brackets afterwards, they put Gulf of America. But I bet if you look it up in America, there ain't no Gulf of Mexico there anymore. What a bunch of suck ups. I mean, what is the point of having all of that money? If you have to do what some winding tangerine toddler says. I thought if you were a billionaire, if you had a thousand million dollars, then that would come with a certain amount of power. But apparently not. What's the point? I mean, they don't appear to be enjoying the actual money part.

1:37:07I mean, look at that moon face creeper runs meta, for instance. I mean, if you've ever seen him in any attire that looks like it costs more than about $10. What's he spending his money on? Not happy, not HPP-Y-N-S. That's for sure. So you would think, well, maybe power. Maybe he will enjoy the power. That comes with all of that money. But it seems to have spent all of his time genu-flecting and crawling across the carpet begging for Donnie's favors. Very disappointed with all of that California crew. All of those people that used to be liberals until Donald Trump came along and then they were throwing the double-hile, how are you? As hard as they could. Very disappointed. But, you know, I just added to life's disappointments. Stop whining. I'll do that straightaway.

1:38:08This says, didn't you keep telling us well? Just stop whinging and whining and moaning when the 20-mile-an-hour blanket limit came in. So stop whining. This says Ian in rexam. Yes, I did, but at the time my car's health didn't depend on it. And besides, I wasn't complaining about people doing 20-mile-an-hour. I mean, that is deleterious to the health of my car. What I was complaining about to be absolutely accurate and were only interested in accuracy on this show, to be accurate, I was complaining about people doing 10 miles an hour. There was, this bloke in front of me and he was straddling two lanes so I could not overtake him. Driving me nuts. And I actually went as far as to flashing with my headlights. You believe that? That's how furious I was. I almost sanded my horn. I thought about it. But then I thought about the, you know, the stabbing that will probably ensue from that.

1:39:11So I didn't do it. But he was driving at 10 while conducting a little tour. He's pointing out the buildings in Westminster as he went by. And there's big bend. Yeah, we can see that. Get him over on. But other than that, you know, I wish him a happy life. 0-345-606-073. Friday, Saturday, Sunday night at 10. Nick Abbott. LBC. I really like you. Do you like me? I'm going to play Celtic Park. Well, I can absolutely guarantee you that it will not be as exciting as when the who played Celtic Park in 1976. That's just a fact. And I bet they won't have the sensational Alex Harvey band as support or little feet or streetwalkers or... Paul, just gone right out my mind.

1:40:12Nope, I'll never get that back. Never get that back again. They did high tide and green grass. Do you remember that? I know more about grass than any human being I think anywhere in the world. Anywhere in the world, you know, it's more about grass than? Yeah, it was high tide and green grass. Great track. Oh, so exciting. It was just absolutely... I was almost leaving my body. It was so exciting. The who? Live at Celtic Park. Oasis Live at Celtic Park on the other hand. What's the word I'm looking for? Laurie! Yeah, I can't imagine it. I saw that band live. They were the most boring band I've ever seen in my life. The singer just came up to the microphone and his stupid cagull zipped up to his neck with his hands behind him. He walks around like Prince Charles. Boo! Just a terrible attitude.

1:41:12And they didn't do anything. They just stood there and played. It was just shockingly bad. You would have to pay me. I wouldn't pay money to go and see him. You would have to pay me a lot of money. And then I might just take it and do a runner. Manchester, hello, Dan. Dan? Oh, Dan? That's a shame he's waited a while. Never mind, eh? Let's see now. Hoi Lake, Merzyside, Loneora. I am Nick. I've been waiting quite a long time. Yes, you have. Yes. It's Fox and Nick. It's found them better. Yes, I am, thanks. That way, like, always the bank holiday weekend, isn't it? Because it's said it knows that you've got to do horse shits. A cruel and unusual punishment for whatever it was I did. So, have you got your boss pass yet?

1:42:13I've got my boss pass yet. Well, not on me. Oh, you have got one, then. Because you don't need a car when you get to... I don't even know what age it is. Merzyside is a bit different. It depends whether you're going where the bus goes. That was always the adventure. Yeah. I mean, you could just take the bus to anywhere. Yeah, magical mystery tour. Right. Well, I'm at that age now that everything's a mystery tour. Yeah, from going from the living room to the kitchen, it's like, why did I come in here? Yeah, in the bathroom. What am I doing in here? Well, that's easier to figure out. Yeah, I know that was the joke. Anyway, so, did you see the chase this week? The chase? Yes, I'd hate it. You don't watch it. Law of the bus was on it. A law of it should be a bus or a bus. Really? The vest, yeah. It's just so pretty. The vest? Yeah. The girl who's comes under the chickens. The vet was on the chase. Yeah.

1:43:13How did she do? Okay. How did you know it was her? I don't know. Just sounded like her and they were lorries and a bath operas. Oh, right. Yeah. You couldn't mistake her, but I said definitely what? Well, that's bizarre. I mean, I think that that's a good show. I don't watch it, but I think it's a good format. Yeah. You know, as far as those kind of shows go, it's a good one. I prefer it to dolphins. I don't know what that is. Completely different format. Anyway, that was it. I thought you might be interested. And the other thing was you said a spooner isn't before. I like a spooner isn't. What was it that I said? Saving rattles, rattling savers. Oh, right. I don't know. A spooner isn't there. Yeah. One guy was on your show once and you said one. I don't know how he got through the net, but it's... Very, very easy to get through this net. Okay. Well, I'll just say as it should have been said, night in shining arms.

1:44:14That's right. Thank you for saying it correctly. Nor I appreciate that. Thank you. And the other one, I always think is classic. And I don't know how James O'Brien gets away with it in the morning, because he said it a lot. I shall be very, very written it down to a fake proffle. There's a reporter that he often comments on. And this guy is called Disco Little John. And I do believe that that is the last that we'll be hearing about that reporter on this show. If you could be after... Well, not quite, but I'm about to. Oh, okay. Unless there's something else, Nor. I didn't do it in the sense before. No, that was just fine. Oh, good. I've kind of lost track of where the filter is now. Yeah, the filter. What filter? Exactly. Exactly. Welcome to my world. Yeah. All right, good talking to you, Nor. Thanks for that. All right, bye. Jada, 0345, 6060973. This is Heineck. I'm a huge fan of Nigel, and I hope he's our next PM.

1:45:14The left are clearly out to get him as his success and appeal is a threat to their inadequacies. He exudes charisma, intellect, charm, and competence. Says Sarah in Putney. And I do believe that Sarah is being sarcastic. I'm just going to go ahead and assume that that is correct. I don't believe that anybody who lives in Putney would vote for reform, or anything else. I think that Putney people are much more likely to vote Lib Dem, not reform. So you might be out in your own there, Sarah. I wouldn't express those feelings to anybody in your area for fear of a negative response. But I do believe I detect a certain sarcasm in where it's very difficult to get tone when you're just reading off a screen. But I think you have a sarcastic tone, Sarah. Unless you wish to tell me otherwise, in which case, go ahead. But he has been complaining, like a lot.

1:46:16As he faces ongoing questions about both his and his party's finances, Nigel Farage has said the UK is a complainant's society. That news again, man complains about people complaining. Has anyone in the history of forever complained more about everything than him? No. Tech chief Aghash, the reform UK leader, said a whole ecosystem did not want the new kids on the block succeeding. You left out the new kids on the block. He's been a politician for, and this is true, 27 years. He's been in politics for even longer than that. He used to be a member of the Conservative Party when he was 14. 14. Who joins the Conservative Party when they're 14?

1:47:17It must be him and Smug. Your question for me tonight, I might do nothing. Actually, I don't know when Smug joined the Tories. It doesn't really matter, does it? In fact, I bet you'd forgotten that he even exists. And if so, I'm sorry to have brought back such bad memories. I am very sorry that I screwed up totally. I'm so sorry you don't know how far I am. Yeah, very apologetic. So, Aghash is complaining about being squelched by the deep state or some such deranged, trumpian thing. And it's all about people wondering how loud where all this money is coming from that has made them the richest political party in the country. That's true too, by the way. No party has pulled in more cash than reform. They're the party of millionaires funded by billionaires, some of whom actually live here. But despite that, and having the entire right-wing press

1:48:18at their disposal and a near constant presence on our screens, reformed complain and complain and complain. Winging and whining and moaning. And everything is somebody else's fault and we're all being so mean. Stop whining. And they're having their annual conference in Birmingham. Can you imagine anything worse? Faggash would have to give me that five million pound to get me there. It must smell like boiled cabbage in that hole. Essence of old suit. Oh, denage. Splash it all over. And while he was complaining, Tetchy acknowledged his party's poll ratings had taken a hit compared to last year, but said it would rebound and still had every chance of winning the next general election. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Yeah, I think not. And that was a fever dream that the nation had because we were propelled into thinking that by the right-wing press that were for a while there, seemingly desperate to get him into number 10. But even they seem to have backed off now.

1:49:19Not so attractive a prospect now. A. No. The money thing has got them thinking, could that stink rub off on them? So I don't feel though, press is back on the tourist side. And it seems that their readership is of the same mind. Who is following who on that I don't know? It's like swallows in a murmuration, all seemingly turning at the same time. Was it the press that voluntarily switched back to the tourist or their readers forcing them to do it? Either way, in one poll at least, reform are now third. And you know what that rhymes with? And the money thing is getting worse. You know, for a nation that's lost its mind over key stormers free glasses, we don't appear to be in the mood to let go millions and millions of pounds coming from who knows where. And now there's that channel for news report about reform breaching rules about donations which has spooked fagots enough to force his right hand man to quit the party. Two reform officials have now gone

1:50:21because they were filmed by Channel 4 News talking about getting around the rules on political donations from foreign entities. But as we know, rules are a woke lefty plot to keep Tetchy out of power. Go to rules. Rules are for the litter people, you know, people like you and me. The litter people. Not Tetchy and his ilk. And Tetchy is not his usual fancy self. Poor Nige is sad. Got the stuffing knocked out of him, which is exactly what the deep state woke her as he want. So he counted with, elect a reform government and we will stop the votes in a hundred days. A hundred. Why so long? Elect me and I will stop the votes in ten. In fact, I will stop the votes and feed the occupants into a mincer.

1:51:21Now wait, I'll feed them into a mincer. Combine that with cement dust and fill the pot holes in the road with them. There, beat that faggash. He can't. Because he's too occupied at the moment what we all that complaining is doing about how everyone is being mean to the little old, richest party in the land is being asked perfectly reasonable questions and how unfair it all is. 0345, 6060, 973. Let's see now, who's been waiting the longest? Have we been totally fair about this? It looks like Oldbury. Hello, Ranges. Oh no, I've just seen what the time is. I'm going to take a break and come back. All right. Thank you. Listen to him. He knows everything. Yes, back at Oldbury, not Ranges. Hi, Yenik, you're right. Yes, good things. Talking about the weather, yeah. You're going to be shocked about what I'm going to tell you.

1:52:23Go on. Wednesday night, you come back from work. I'll put the central heating on. I'll put the gas fire on. It's all streaming. Yes. I ain't joking, yeah. I know. It was particularly cold, and it was quite a surprise. I didn't plug it in, but I did put my heated blanket on me. Then you are. So I'm not alone on that one. You're talking about moving house. You know, this water had my shop. I used to be a truck driver, and I did containers. And I went to do a house move where we don't get involved. We just load the rock. We reverse back up, and they load the container. And it goes on the street. And this guy was moving to Cyprus. And I just happened to look at what he was doing. And he was pulling a Harley diver to the middle of this container. I was just like, you know, it's none of my business, but you need to strap it down. It is, it will be okay to trust me. I'm going to take it off the road.

1:53:26And he's going to go on and try and ownership to Cyprus. You need to strap it down. This is not put some mattresses on there. About a month later. My boss asked me, is Rangie, you know, not completely picked up from such a place. Did they put a Harley diver to the next one? Because only what the story was, I said, listen. Don't forget my sister, the gaffer. I said, we don't get involved. What we do is we reverse back up to the place where we go. We put the doors and we put the seal on. Right. Nothing to do with me, Squire. Nothing to do with me, Squire. And I said, I did tell him about the easy thing he wanted to put on the mattress. But at least, by the time he got to Cyprus, he's a Harley diver. He's a little piece of a boss gentleman with a lot of gentleman with the green eyes. Yes. Well, that's a shame.

1:54:26I mean, those bikes cost a lot of money. But on the positive side, at least it won't be waking the neighbours up as that person drives it. Because of the noise it makes, it will disturb people in a half a mile radius everywhere he goes. That's it. And going on to the main event, what you're talking about, Nigel Farage, yeah. Mike said, you know, he used his proper name, Mohammed, their user. I think he's got a massive identity crisis to be honest with you. You know, I've been listening all week and people say, he's racist. I think we need to change the name now, other than racist, menisties, who do the word petty distance. So, me as an Asian man, I can have a different color of petty against different Asian people. You know, like Indian and Pakistani, even though we're browns, you know, I can be like that.

1:55:27So, like, you know, when I used to be a truck driver, people used to go to me, are you Indian or Pakistani? I was like, well, I'm like, why are you asking me that for? I'm English. It was no, no, no. As your parents come from, as his Indians, or your Indians, right? So, after a while, I had enough of this, and I thought, what I can say to him, I was just like, no, I didn't see you. I was like, no, I'm definitely English. It was why you asked us to hear all of the same. So, now, there's been confusion on what, you know, obviously, Mohammed, their user, he's doving around things he's using because he sounds a bit more Western or whatever, okay? And he's had to go with this poor lady who, okay, she was a Somalian refugee, came here as a child, educated herself, got elected as a counsellor, got elected as a leader of, whenever he, I think, is your con-member.

1:56:27And a candidate, yeah? So, she's a leader of the council, so she is a refugee subject, and everybody's been going on about this. And we had a prime minister that was born in New York, that's Boris Johnson, okay? I just don't understand the mindset of somebody like Zia Yusuf, who is trying to appeal to a certain type of person who would have him on the first plane out of here as well. And that appears not to have occurred to him, just blows my mind. One thing I would challenge him is, if he thinks he's so good and he's so British and the British people like him, why doesn't he stand against her in that election work here, Starma, is vacating the seat because he has people see if they want him or another Muslim woman from Somalia, and I think he won't even, he's so far, you know, with Nigel Farage, he will not get a selection unless he's a genuine election.

1:57:30Well, I tell you what, I think that we should allow the people of Clackton to decide, and I know what their decision will be in that regard. I got to go, but thanks for that, 0345, 6060, 973. This says, that last caller, not that last caller, but whatever this message was sent in, the caller then, could have been hours ago, that last caller remarking on James O'Brien this morning, I'm sure Struckon over the lot of Farage supporters, and this is an example of this, it's baffling that these people don't see him for who he is. It's crazy that this man speaks for the people, but the people don't see he's living a very different life. Yeah, wake up people. It's later than you think. And this is Nick, I hear the daywalker, Baron... Not the nightwalker, the daywalker, Baron Trump. Baron Trump is worth $150 million, and he's 20 years old. Nothing suspicious, not even slightly dodgy, says Kevin Wollington.

1:58:34Well, I'm glad to hear that, because otherwise that would be concerning. Nothing even slightly dodgy. 0 to see here, please move along. And this says, Hey Nick, with regards to that chat with the short limbs, Charles Turwitt on German Street offers various arm lengths on all their shirts. Says Damien from Ashby, Delizouc, if you please. And David in Tharnham says, 14 to 20% amend our six foot and over on plague island. MNS sells clothes in all lengths, so does just about every decent store. I'm not sure whether it were your previous caller shops, well, this is in relation to some while ago, when a poor chap with unusually short limbs couldn't get a shirt or trousers to fit him. Trages is easy. You just got to pay a seamstress, 15 quid to turn them up for you,

1:59:35and they come long to appeal to the widest possible customer base. Shirt sleeves are different, and we've talked about it a couple of times. They used to be your way to keep your shirt cuffs just so, and they used to be garsers for your arms. We just sound like a weird thing, they never look very comfortable to me, but that's what grandads used to do, because they'd be tending their allotments, and they couldn't get their cuffs dirty, because that'd be the same shirt they wear to church on Sunday. How times have changed? 0345-6060-973. Tavistock, hello Rose. Hello Nick. I've got just sort of very quick mentions before my main point, if I may, but my shirt is flapping about, now as we speak, because I've got a few rather nice men's shirts from charity shops, which I wear.

2:00:36Literally, I've got my penny my hand there, and there is this huge cuff flapping about, and very often I've thought of those garter things, funnily enough, but I've never bothered to look it out, because I can't be bothered. I wonder if you can even buy them anymore. No, quite. Just two quick things before I launch. I did think it was funny, Nick, right at the beginning of your programme. I switched on, and Rachel was sort of doing the end, and going, loud, Nick, I've got a new set. A new set, thank you Rachel. Sorry, I got you, I've sold it now. It was the way you went, sweetly. Thank you Rachel, and then bellowed. Yes. So, if it's in you, if it's in you, you have to have to let it out. Package, yes I know. The other quick thing is, Gulf of Mexico, Gulf of America has no rhythm to it, does it?

2:01:37No. You simply can't say Gulf of America, the Gulf of Mexico, there's a song isn't there? Down the Gulf of Mexico. Oh, you know all those songs. Isn't that the Copicabana guy? I don't know, but it was very rhythmic, the way they used that name. Barry Manolo, was not the Barry Manolo. But also Lakeley. I don't think I'd have heard it if it had been Barry Manolo. Oh, Barry Manolo has some great songs. How can you not like Barry Manolo? I'm being serious, Rose. Well, to be fair, Nick, I never gave it enough of a try, shall we say? So I wouldn't say he was good or he was bad. Was he a little too modern for you? A little too rock and roll. A little rock and roll. No, I don't think it was soppy. Soppy, yeah. But the Copicabana song, that's a great track. Everybody loves that track.

2:02:37Well, I know that name. Oh, Rose, you must know the Copicabana song. Why? Everybody knows the Copicabana song. Do they? Why does everybody have to do the same thing? It's the law. You just miss it a crime. I don't get this thing, where everyone has to do the same. It's just difficult to believe that you could have gone through your life to this point and not heard the Copicabana song. If it came on the radio, you think, oh, this one, I like this one. I bet you do. Bet, jerk, bet, jerk. Well, from what you're saying, I'm almost certain I must have heard it. Yes, but there are great many one as heard. You know what I mean? So you're going to say. Yeah. Well, you've forgotten them yet. No, I haven't. It's just that I also thought I wanted to say to you, oh dear, at the time,

2:03:39the Somalian thing. What I thought was a bit of a coincidence. The way he's pointed to this Somalian person, I keep saying Somalian, when, according to my, you know, my letter from America, my American friend, the whole awful ice thing has just started deporting all Somalians. And I just thought they always copy Trump. And now the first, you know, he sees the use of sees this Somalian name. What Somalian we must attack. I don't suppose that's true. It just seemed beyond coincidence somehow. And then I was thinking, you know, when you say that the people they want to appeal to will send, would send somebody like you to the way. I've often thought that people like him and push you to tell and so on. And as you do along the lines of, in order not to be bullied, you become the bully. You know, like people say about public school, people became bullies,

2:04:42so they won't, wouldn't be the bullied. Maybe, yeah, I just cannot get it in, I just can't get my mind around that they think that the people they are trying to appeal to will exclude people like Zia Yusuf and Pretty Patel and the rest of it. She used to be, yeah. Oh, yeah, I know. Yeah. Purple woman, yeah. Exactly. Yeah. The awful woman. Yeah, that is correct. Yeah. But why those people assume that the crowd that they're trying, they're sort of rabble that they're going to or try and, you know, for meant will give them a pass. I mean, in what parallel lifetime, would that ever happen? Well, I know. I mean, the disguise wouldn't work, would it? You know, that was my theory. It's got to be. But as long as they present themselves as the bullies of the immigrants,

2:05:44and they, you know, have come up and become stand-up citizens and MPs of what I'll tell you. Yeah. Then they'll be safe from being bullied and deported by these mad flipping raises. No. The lack of self-awareness is quite staggering. I just don't understand what their heads are at. I am not one of your fans. This says hello. Which is a very nice way to start. Hello. What are you chatting about tonight? I may call in. Spoke to James once. Waging for a good topic says Michaela. Well, it looks like we're safe so far. Only another 25 minutes to go. Let's see if we can go through the entire show without hearing from Michaela. No offense. This says, Hi, Nick, you've never read any of my texts out, but I hope you read this one as it's another name for Trump. And it's Citrus Caesar. No.

2:06:44This says, Stephen Richmond says, I'd like to add General Pino Shameless as a Trump name. No. This one. The males in my family have long limbs so they have the opposite problem to that of your recent listener. They can't afford several row either. Any suggestions? Long limbs. By a bigger shirt. And just because if it... I don't know why it would necessarily be so that if you're a large person, you know, in size large, that your arms would be longer. Surely the large part refers to how wide you are around the waist, doesn't it? I mean, your arms don't get faster if you eat two puddings, do they? Not faster, longer. Charlie, hello, Trevor. Oh, hello there, Nick. I'm sorry, I don't know what I live in.

2:07:44Why? I think it is... I want to talk about... The comment this week by the government is on... ...Story Not Pearl Winter because of El Nino. It was Charles R. Sveit-Kendor, it was just... No, I don't know. It was Charles, but whether... ...Rain, etc. like that. And we were told to stock up on... ...on goods in the houses, like, tens of beans and teens of... ...Ruban coasted on, and they get packaged around them, ...costed the ocean with air. We were... We were told to... We were told to try the partial peg, so we were going to be... ...last on the shelf, and I was like... ...it's not necessarily the thing today. I would have thought that... ...it would have been... ...a few health programs, it's like unions, you know, that... ...we were about that way. We were told to... ...something like that, rather than broadcast it over the media... ...where it's going to be a crisis pattern, ...it's going to be a rush for all goods, and... ...you know, the goods... ...because the shops... ...and I'll forget the goods in the shops... ...passed the series, the pressures on them... ...they're going to put prices up because they're... ...rushing the goods in the shops, but...

2:08:45...passes them, conveys, but now they're going to be... ...shortages. But I mean, it's just... ...it might be going on, it's just weird. It certainly is, yeah. That was the first thing that occurred to me. It's weird. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, thanks for... ...spotting, I tell you. And don't forget your refreshments. Booze. You don't want to run out of that. 0345, 6060, 973. Nick says, oh no, this is... ...to me, I'm called Nick. It says, Nick. Uniclo recently only sells trousers at 34-inch leg length. They used to sell lengths of 30-36 in one-inch increments. I took a suit jacket to a tailor, and instead of lengthening the sleeves, he shortened them by one-and-a-quarter inches. I understand your callers' pain about these things. Well, that's just poor communication on your part. You should have made it absolutely clear that you're supposed to increase the length of the sleeves, not shorten them. And as for Uniclo, only selling trousers at 34-inch leg lengths,

2:09:47that seems a bit weird. I mean, if they used to sell to 36, then you would assume that there would be a market for people with 36-inch legs. But now they... Maybe they just ran out. Did you think of that? Don't ask me no idea. Let's see, no. Springfield, Oregon, Andrew. All right, Nick. Andrew. Evening Nick. Yes, Andrew. I was burning it. That lady was talking about... ...Faigache, I've missed that one before. That's a good name for him. Ron Poutine is what I call Trump, because with a silent tea, obviously capital R, U-M-P. And Poutine, because Poutine is the wife of Putin, and that pretty much describes him at this stage, I think. Poutine is the wife of Putin? Yeah, it's... Apparently in Russia, the wife gets it A at the end of the name,

2:10:50and then, you know, Putin becomes Poutine. I did not know that. But I can't believe how many people are missing out on... They're talking about this, the millions he's got. I'm like, what about all the support he's got from Steve Bannon and Elon Musk? I mean, does that get... I thought that he and Elon Musk had a falling out, and that Musk was all in restore or reclaim or rewind. That's true, but he wouldn't be where he is now if he hadn't had that help back then sort of thing, you know. So it was... It was one of those things where he's got away with it, and then Steve Bannon, the one that really gets me, because I won't forget about that. Let's back up. I don't think he got any money from Elon Musk. I think Elon Musk was a supporter, and the... There's no money change, Hans, and I think that's true. Oh, no, I don't... I would never say that money change, Hans.

2:11:50What it was was Elon Musk, just to keep the algorithm working in his favor. Yeah, boosting. Elon Musk, who wanted to get rid of all the Robo accounts, didn't get rid of the Robo account and stuff. Right, boosting his profile online, gotcha. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sort of thing. And that goes along with this, back to Steve Bannon, and Alexander the Russian connection. In America, they're like, oh, the Russia report, the Mother report. I'm like, there was an obstruction of justice. That was the only thing we got out of that was that he obstructed justice so we didn't really get a report. But the connection, the fact that Steve Bannon, who tried to set up the Nazi university in Northern Italy and got turned down... Well, I'm not sure it was a Nazi university. It was a university that only... A very far-right university, there was so far-right, even the Italian far-right said no to it when they came to it. Right. Well, I don't know anything about that.

2:12:50So the Alexander Dugan guy is the guy called the Putin Whisperer. And he's the one that... You know, the architect of this plan to dismantle the West by getting England out of Europe, America out of the UN. And he's been pushing... I thought that was the Heritage Foundation. Well, Alexander Dugan is the Russian person who's the other end of it. Well, I didn't know that it was another end of it. I thought that it was not the far-right necessarily, but the people behind Trump in America, that was their plan, Project 2025, I think. Yeah, but Dugan's been doing this 40, 30 or 40 years now. So his plan's well and truly out there. You can, afterwards, you check up on him, you'll find out that he's a scary weird character in terms of what he... Well, it's not surprising that the Russians want Europe to be destroyed from the inside.

2:13:53What is kind of weird is that that seems to be the case in America. In the Republican Party as well. That was not expected. That's those libertarians. I mean, the Ayn Rand libertarians have always been about this. I mean, Trump years ago, when he was running for office, was talking about dismantling his buddy Steve Bannon back to Steve Bannon. His great thing is to basically get rid of government and democracy, along with Peter Thiel and all of that, lot. I think Nigel Farage is so... He's over at Mar-Lago. He's... Friends with Steve Bannon. Steve Bannon is also the guy that tried to rehabilitate Jeff Reppstein after... Rehabilitation. Well, I don't know anything about that either. Whatever he did in that regard didn't work. And I'm not sure that he did. You're making a lot of allegations here, Andrew, many of which I'm not familiar with. But I'm going to leave it there and just give Nigel Farage the last word.

2:14:54The Russians. Russia. Russia. Russia. Russia, Russia. OK, thanks a lot, mate. That was slightly alarming all the way through. Let's just say, if we're talking trousers, lengths, can we talk chair heights too? Too high for the majority of the general public. Designed for the comfort of a six-foot tall man. Absolute misery. I want to go back to Japan where my feet touch the floor and I don't feel like an alien. Chair heights, cafes, buses, trains, table heights, kitchen worktop heights, says Anne. Well, I never really thought about that. I thought that table heights are all the same. I think it's 72 inches off the ground, something like that. Table heights, there is a standard size for a chair and a table height. But I'm very surprised if it was made for a six-foot tall man. Because only recently we had many of those.

2:15:56You go back 50 years and we were all much shorter. You go back 100 years and you could fit us into a symbol. I mean, Japan would probably be smaller, but I wonder if they have different sizes of chairs. In Japan, because we get Japanese furniture, I would doubt that. Are you sure about that, Anne? Not entirely convinced. Let's see. Gold is green. Hello, Sarah. Hi. Hi. Hi. Sarah. I guess I think you have different size furniture in Japan. I look symposium for a year. I don't seem to recollect it. I just like, no way more than that. And just to say, weirdly enough, I actually watched the violin video with that chair, where he would basically not be, he was telling it to be not to, just put on some work that balance voice wouldn't be part of the video.

2:16:59And weirdly enough, I listened to that, what's your new chief to Israel. And then just to put on the top of that, a way to... It's on the YouTube, so it's real. It's a lot better. But also a way to say, I like to say, as Paul Whitehouse used to say in the far show, who is he swaffy? They were the only bands that I wanted to pick it like, an odd bit, a ticket, how it... Well, I made loads of a lot of money on tickets for them. But I once actually went to a gig on the lower deck of the boat going, and did me a hard part at the end of the festival. And Liam was in front of me with his giant thiamen drink. And it was before we all had no ball phones. But I had this reversible lens camera. And I tried to take back, like, back as to what they were then,

2:18:00a selfie. And this is the only time I do a Liam Gallinger impression when he goes, give it ill, or if I've got a long go round, but I might have just said so, no, recently. And my only need to let a story was, really enough, is that I went to a top art school. And as part of my work experience, I was a master's panel for bands, who's furry animals. So I went to go and to do work, who's doing the outfits design place, just knowing that they did the front cover for them. But it was the week that they were having the fight against blur. And I was a big time blur fan for a rock top poem, a little spread, a little dress, and my little short indie kid haircut looking every bit of the mod. I opened the door in the studio and showed it. And I was presented to the wall of gold, a racist album. And I was like, oh my god, because it was literally the week of blur going to racist.

2:19:02And after speaking, it was the design company called Microdop. And after initially speaking to Brian Cannon, the creator, I was way into speaking a bit longer to which the senior designer, and I'm going to have to start this out, turned round to me, and he went, if you want his attention, not be better take off his top. So how about that? I didn't go into my work. To be fair, that's pretty much what every ex-fleet street photographer would yell at any woman who went out of the red carpet. Take yourself off love. Carol, I'm giving an over talking about that a lot on the podcast we do. Hey, Carol, she wouldn't play. No, she didn't play that game. Arrived on the red carpet in a coat. And when it be ever seen a woman do that. Thanks a lot, Sarah, for that magical mystery to her.

2:20:04This says, it's a shame that we lost Dolly Parton last week. She famously used to say that it cost a lot of money to look that cheap. No matter how cheap she tried to look, she always looked like a million dollars. Boris Johnson seems to have the exact same philosophy where he spends a lot of money to look like a flabby parasitic... Flabby parasitic bag of sick says James. That's pretty offensive, eh, Bob? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, where do we find it? He may have nailed you. Oh, I must go away in order to come back. Come on, we're running light. Brighton, hello, Angela. Hello, Nick. How are you doing, babe? Good, thanks. It's about your, your friend, your lady's caller. I think her name was Lily. And she was saying it has to be the goal for Mexico. It can't be the goal for the America. Yeah. Yeah. I think what she was thinking of was a four-line refrain to an old song called The Battle of New Orleans.

2:21:12Yeah. Well, it's just a four-line refrain. And the very last line is of a refrain down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico. Yeah. So you couldn't have down the Mississippi to the Gulf of America, could you? It doesn't work. No. We fired our guns and the British kept the coming. There wasn't as many as there was a while ago. A while ago, yeah. We fired once more and they began to run on down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico. Hey, baby, you've got it. Okay. Thank you very much for having me on again. Excellent work. Thanks for what Angela? There you are. Clear it up for us. This says Farage had the had had had and I love the poorly educated moment today. His retort to a Hecler was well folks. That's what a university education gets you. Yeah, they're trying to make their fans angry at smart people. Smart people do not tend to vote reform. I mean, that's just a fact.

2:22:13The, and I've qualified that. People with who have a high attainment in education do not vote reform. They didn't vote for Brexit and they don't vote for reform. The more education you have, the less likely you are to vote for reform. That's just true. You might not like that. And I'm not saying that that's the case with everybody. I mean, there's probably geniuses who vote for reform. But overall, the more qualifications you have, the less likely you are to vote for reform. And they want the people that are going to vote for reform to really hate those with qualifications. Which is part of that. We do not wish to hear about comments from experts anymore. That's where that's from. Same with Trump. Constantly bashing universities. Trying to defund them.

2:23:13And a constant battle over there. It's because education is the enemy. They don't want you to be educated. They want you to just take the word of the dear leader. And it's just not a long. That's it. This is, you might read this eventually Nick. It's taken me a while, but I finally realized too, Fagash reminds me of. It's Huey Green on Opportunity Dogs. He was brilliant at being false. Yeah. Well, that's interesting. Huey Green, quite possibly. Hackney, hello Richard. I have a Nick. I wanted to talk to you about clothing, but I think it's a quick word on Nigel. Because you mentioned that he's. He spent a lot of time complaining about how much British people complain. Yeah. And also I'm thinking for someone who doesn't do anything wrong. He's spending a lot of time telling us that he hasn't done anything wrong.

2:24:14That's right. Every time I switch on the radio, he says we have not done anything wrong. We've broken no laws. No laws. We have broken no laws, which is not something you hear a lot from people who haven't broken any laws. Not that I'm saying they've broken any laws. I'm just saying that people don't ordinarily say I've not broken any laws if they've broken no laws. I haven't broken any laws lately, but I don't bang on about it. It sounds like you're guilty to me Richard. I have not done anything wrong. Everything you say makes you sound guilty. Can I talk about trousers, trousers? Yes, of course. Yes, we should start worrying about the lengths. The length is not the problem. It's the width. I agree. Why is it so difficult for people who make clothes to agree on what an inch is? How about... I understand that. I've taken to sort of measuring off a piece of string now and I go into a shop.

2:25:16I just like to see, okay, it's the whole thing. That's a good idea. Yeah, put the... Is the waistband this piece of string? Yeah, that's exactly what you don't have to try them on. Just put... I've always meant to do this and I've never actually done it yet. I just keep forgetting to take a piece of string with me. Put the string around your waist and then put it onto the piece of clothing that you're thinking of buying. And if the two match up, then bingo. But even worse than that is the width at the other end, the ankle end. Because I went into marks and get this... Do you have fat ankles? No, but I went into looking for summer trousers as the heat wave. Right. And they had three models on display. One was fitted. Yeah. One was super slim and one was ultra slim. Are they saying all the same? Well, fitted look like a pair of skinny jeans. Right, horrible. Yeah. Ultra slim look like... Do you remember those stovepipe trousers that were even tighter than skinny jeans?

2:26:21No. Oh, I'm going back to the 80s now. You wore your stovepipe trousers and your Greek fishermen hat and your big bulky jacket. That sounds terrible. No, okay. So you had to be fit for a dress. And ultra fit had just looked like a coat of paint. Yeah, like a sprayer, like a ballet tight. Yeah. And so I'm sitting there and I'm looking around. And this is an M&S. An M&S. Yeah, the men's wear section of M&S. And let's just say that nobody there was under mid-50s. No, exactly. I think nobody in this room needs a pair of fitted trousers. No, you need an elasticated waisted action slacks and a brown cardigan. With a cuff that kind of covers your entire shoe, maybe. Yeah. Something that wide. You don't need to be going around in clean cloth. It's the last thing. Because you will abort those shoes from the back pages of the Daily Telegraph magazine.

2:27:30And they will probably have a zip on them for ease of use. And they look hideous. So you want to cover those up as much as possible. But if you've widened through the papers, it's a bargain. You get them at only twice the price of the high-speed. It's $29.99. Everything is at $99.00 P at the end to make it appear as though. It's not $30.00. It's $29.99. Big savings. And they come in colors unavailable anywhere else. Like box blood teal. Yeah, colors not known to nature. That's right. Just a quick thought to Rosie was complaining about having a sloppy cast. Yeah. She said she had a men's shirt, the cast were very ploppy. Right. I wondered, has she accidentally picked up a double-cust shirt by mistake? Oh, smart thinking. That very, very difficult to engineer. Because have you tried putting cufflinks in yourself?

2:28:32It's almost impossible. It is impossible. Because you need two hands. But that's what you don't have when you're trying to put cufflinking. Because one hand is just flapping about useless. So inevitably you end up with the cufflink on the table. One hand kind of holding everything down. And you try to bend the little thing over with your teeth. That's how it happens in my house. Right. Whatever function it is that you would be invited to if you had to go through all of that polo. I just think I'd send my regards and decline the invite to hell with it. I'm not going. Just put on a white t-shirt underneath a black suit. Yeah. So you're going richer at 80s. Exactly. That'll do. Yeah. Good talk to your Richard. Thanks for that. Thank you. Got to go. Thank you so much for your attention to this matter. I, oh God. 21 pages of messages. That's ridiculous.

2:29:32How do these people get my number? So obviously I didn't get through nearly enough tonight. I will try my best. Did, did, did this evening when I come back at 10. And the ones that I don't get through, well they will be, you know, the ones that are appropriate. They will show up on the Nick Abbott, the whole show plus extra show for people that subscribe to Nick Abbott, the whole show plus. You get the Friday and Saturday night shows, add free as podcasts plus the extra show on a Monday plus the newsletter that gets put into your inbox on a Friday that wipes up the week's news and launches into the weekend. Ask for Nick Abbott, the whole show plus on global player and LBC app. I think you'll love it.