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educationOct 23, 202441:14pending

Brook Olsen: Negative Advocates, Parallel Parenting, and Co-Parenting Without the War

About this episode

Almost everyone in your life is telling you to fight. Brook Olsen, founder of the High Conflict Diversion Program, has spent years showing parents why that advice so often makes things worse, and what to do instead.

Brook has a name for the people pushing you to escalate: negative advocates. They mean well, but the "don't just sit there, fight back" instinct they hand you tends to feed the very war you're trying to end. The alternative isn't going quiet or giving in. It's parallel parenting: you run your home, they run theirs, and communication stays brief, factual, and strictly about the kids. In this conversation with Lisa, Brook covers how to be the proactive problem-solver a judge respects, where parental alienation really begins, and why staying engaged and strategic beats disappearing.

✅ WHAT YOU'LL LEARN
 ✅ The difference between a "normal" divorce and a genuinely high-conflict one
 ✅ What a "negative advocate" is, and how to spot one in your own circle
 ✅ Why fighting back the way friends and family urge you to usually backfires
 ✅ How parallel parenting works when co-parenting isn't possible
 ✅ The "brief, informative, factual, firm, and friendly" rule for every message
 ✅ How to walk into court as the proactive problem-solver, not the complainer
 ✅ Where parental alienation actually starts, and why that matters
 ✅ Why staying engaged beats going silent, even when it's exhausting

⏱️ TIMESTAMPS (+1:00 for the bumper)
 0:00 Intro
 1:00 What makes a divorce genuinely "high-conflict"
 10:52 Negative advocates: the people pushing you to fight
 17:20 Parallel parenting and business-like communication
 23:11 How to be the proactive problem-solver in court
 29:28 Where parental alienation really begins
 37:54 Parallel parenting vs. co-parenting
 39:38 Where to find Brook and more support

CTA (spoken): Co-parenting with someone who thrives on conflict? Book a free discovery call at beentheregotout.com.
 Books: When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You — https://www.amazon.com/Been-There-Got-Out-Against/dp/1967674183 · Been There Got Out — https://www.amazon.com/Been-There-Got-Relationships-Circumstances/dp/194627495X/
 Tags: parallel parenting, high conflict co-parenting, negative advocates, brook olsen, parental alienation, custody, co-parenting with a narcissist, protecting your kids, high conflict divorce

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Brook Olsen: Negative Advocates, Parallel Parenting, and Co-Parenting Without the War

Been There Got Out Podcast

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