Morgan & Lunchbox Talk All Things Cruise From The Ship

0:00This is an I Heart Podcast, Guaranteed Human. Hey, this is Well Zadams with By Order of the Faithfuls Podcast alongside my fellow faithfuls and co-hosts, Tamra Judge and Laura's Catania. The three of us have been watching the season of the Traders, and we've been inside that castle, so we have insight unlike many others. This season of the Traders may be the best we've ever seen. To buy Order of the Faithfuls on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, when's last time you've listened to Hot 995? Because we have all of the music, but also a lot more. Like in turn, John, in your morning show, I'm Elizabethan E. I want to make sure you always know about the latest events, deals, and things we're making fun of around the DMV. I love this station. You talk about real stuff. And Nicola is gets you access to all of your favorite artists, and we're all given a bunch of things away every day. In fact, you might even be able to win a million dollars. Oh, it's never working, awesome!

1:02We're DC's number one Hamie's station, Hot 995. The best bits of the week, with Morgan. Part one. Behind the scenes, with a member of the show. For the first time ever, we are doing best bits from the crew's, and joining me is none other than lunchbox. What's up, lunchy? So I am up. This crew's is bananas, but nannas. We are really having the time of our lives over here. Like these people do not stop. Like I don't know, man, there's something going on all the time, and there's people there all the time, and they don't go to sleep, and they don't eat, they just drink, and they- Yeah, that used to be you. No, no, no. These are people used to be you, and now you're such an old man, you're still trying to sleep all the time. No, no, no, no. It's not that I'm an old man, it's you have to talk to every single person, do you know how tiring that is? I mean, I'm doing it with you, I do understand.

2:05Oh, man. But also, you used to thrive in this environment, all you've ever wanted is to be famous. No, no, I am famous, and it feels great. It is great. It is just, it's a lot. It's fun. Yeah, but every time I talk to you, you're like, I either need a nap, or I need to eat. Those are like the two levels that you hit. Well, I mean, it is now two o'clock in the afternoon, I've had breakfast. That's all I've got to eat, because I've been working the whole time. Working and having fun. You were doing some bingo, which is fun. I was doing bingo, I was doing blackjack, but they did not give me any food, and then I went to go order a sandwich, and you said, we don't have time for a sandwich, we got a record, best, best. I didn't say that. And you grabbed me by the ear, and I'd drug me up here. It acts like I'm your mother, which has been kind of an ongoing theme on this cruise. Everybody's like, are you his handler? Are you his mom? And honestly, kind of a combination of the two. I have to round you up quite a few times. I do appreciate it. Yeah. Keep in track of you. I'm sure you don't fall off the boat. Yeah, but it's pretty cool.

3:06It's a little weird being out here in this big thing called a boat. I don't know how it floats, first of all. And then also not being able to see land, very weird. You know, you are really lucky, though, because this cruise in particular, we haven't really been that far from land the whole time. Right. Like, we've been circling the Bahamas the whole time since we left NASA. We've seen Bimini. We're just kind of floating out here at sea going six miles an hour. Oh, that's nice. So like, we're really not far if you did fall overboard, you could swim to shore. No, no, I'm not talking about me falling overboard. I'm not going to fall. Then what are you worried about? Like, not being able to see things? Some happens to the boat. Do you just sink like the Titanic? Well, I need to see land so I can swim there. That's what I said. If you go overboard, we're close enough you could swim right now. I'm touted. I'm not a very good swimmer. I did learn that about you. You and Ray can't swim. And you swim like doggie paddle style. Yeah. Did you never have swimming lessons as a kid? Oh, probably did. I was on swim team for a couple of minutes and then I quit. Couple minutes, like, really?

4:07Just a couple of minutes. I don't know. I don't know how long, but I mean, it's just been so long since I've really swam. Okay, so who's teaching your kids out of swim, though? Professionals? Okay. So you're going to take them somewhere to learn how to swim? No, we took them somewhere and then we had a 16 year old high school kid teaching them. And then now it's just like, they're going to learn the more they're in the pool. We realize the more they just learn. Yeah, that's true. But I'm just, you know, thinking about their dad, not being able to swim. What happened to me? No, I can swim. Yeah, it was pretty sad. I'm not going to watch you swim. What do you mean? We're kind of doing like the little doggie paddle. I was taking my time. We weren't racing. We were just lollygagging in the ocean. It wasn't like I was like, hey, swim here to here in 30 seconds. I would have, you know, put some mustard into it. But there was no, you put some mustard in it. Yeah, I would have, some mayonnaise too. No, just mustard. Okay. And I would have done it a little bit better instead. I was just going to lollygagging in the water. You were. No big deal. It was an interesting fact, I learned. It's just not your guys as strong soon.

5:08Yeah, so I got to really improve. I needed to go to do adult swim lessons because when I'm on survivor, you got to be able to swim. Oh, I didn't think about that. Yeah, so I got to get adult lessons. You need to do that before. Just in case you ever get your shot, you're ready to go. What's what I'm saying? I've got to get adult lessons. Yeah, like sooner rather than later. And for your own survival. Yes. General. Yeah. And he did, we're floating in the waves. That you did good at. We, so let's talk about our trips off of the boat. We'll get back to the boat. Where did we go? The first one we did was Key West. Oh, yeah. And we rented a golf car and we went around the island driving. We rented a golf cart. No, the golf golf cars. Yep. I mean, my fiance sells them. So I've never been in a golf car. I've been in a golf car. They're called golf cars. Golf carts are the ones that used to be only go like a certain speed and they didn't have engines and stuff. Those were golf carts. But now the ones that they sell that most people have that are like street legal and stuff, they're golf cars. The more you know, never knew that. The more you know, I'll call it a golf cart.

6:09Anyways, we rented one on Key West. And we're all there we go. We went, oh, we went to the Hemingway House. Yeah. And saw the polydactyl cats. Oh, they're called? Yeah, the six tobeens. Well, let me tell you something about that house. It smelled like pee. Yeah, it did smell like pee. It was kind of gross. And it was really humid in there. Yeah, and so the pee smelled really bad. So I was like, let's get out of here. But it was fun. I bet I bet a lot of the cats. Yeah, and it was cool. I mean, the oldness of the house. If I knew who Ernest Hemingway was, it would be better. Ernest too. Hemingway. If I knew what you like with the repeat, like Bimini. Hemingway. Well, you just said, what was his name again? So I said it again. His name's Ernest Hemingway. I don't know what he wrote. So it's not really that cool to me, but it was a cool old house. I know he was a writer, but I didn't read his stuff. He's a famous writer for sure. And there's like one that I think I know. Let me see. You didn't read him. There's like one book that I think I have ever mind of read from him. And I don't know for sure.

7:09So that's why I'm googling his most famous books. OK. Let me see. Well, wait. Don't worry. We'll go ahead and talk about something. We were all petting the cats. No, we put it at the cats. The cats were cool. But I don't know if it was worth $19 to get into that museum. Yeah. It was worth it to me just pet the cats. I cared about that more than I did. They're the animal shelter and pack cats for free. Not six toe bean kitties. They're all running around. Happy as can be climbing trees. There was one asleep in a gutter. Yeah, he was hanging on the side of the house. Yeah, that was fine. No, I don't think I've read. He has a garden of Eden. I don't know what that is. I don't know. But he has a lot of them. And yes, I feel like maybe I did ring them. Did he write where the sidewalk is? No, that's not him. Oh, I read that in school. How about curious George goes to the zoo? He did not read that one, either. What about curious George goes to the chocolate shop? OK, now you're just making them names. I think that's not a main domain. What then what book is that? It's curious George. It's curious George joins the soccer team. Do you read that? Did you read Juni B Jones?

8:10Who? Juni B Jones. Those were the best books for that. Juni B Jones. She was like a kid, and she was going through her life and had all these crazy moments. And there's, oh gosh, there's like 40 or 50 of them. They're just these little chapter books. No, I don't know, Jody B Jones. Juni B Jones. Are you saying Juni? Juni. Never heard of her. What about Encyclopedia Brown? You read that? No. Oh, man. We had different childhoods. Yeah, what about maniac McGee? Anyway, so we did go to a new hell. Did you want to get into my question? I don't know how that is. I just stated we had different childhoods. Yeah, maniac McGee and my mom would read that to me at night. So you're maniac McGee? Well, I remember there was a frog in it. Do you identify more with curious George or maniac McGee? Oh, curious George. That was my jam. You're a curious monkey. That was my jam. Yeah, you dress up as a one year or two with your kids. I was the man in the yellow hat. My middle son was a curious George for Halloween. It was pretty cool. So we did do that. We did him and my house. And then what did we do? We went to, there was like a four beach state park.

9:13No, we went to a bar. Well, yeah, we popped in a bar, but not very long. Then we went to breakfast. We didn't eat breakfast at the breakfast club, too. Yeah. And it was bomb. We had a pancake charcuterie board. Yeah, the pancake charcuterie board was dumb. Why was it dumb? It tasted so good. It was way too many pancakes. But we ate almost all of that. No, we ate half. That's not true. We had four left and there was 14. So it was all right. I didn't think the pancakes were that great. The French toast board was better than the pancake board in my opinion. French toast fondue was the other thing that we got. Oh, is that what it's called? Yeah, fondue. And I got the shrimp and grits good. That's some of the best food we've kind of eaten, honestly, this week. Yeah, you're right about that. Yeah, really good food. Then we went. That's when we went to the state park beach and we hung out on the beach for a hot minute. Well, you guys weren't such a hurry. That drove me nuts. Why? Well, we didn't go there just to hang out at the beach. Well, why not? Why did we go to the beach if we were going to hang out for 12 minutes and then say, all right, let's go, guys.

10:13Let's go. I mean, I think we were there for like 45 minutes. So I didn't even get to enjoy the water. You were in there. We swam out to the rocks and we hung out on the rocks. But you can only sit on the rocks for so long. Right. And then you're like, if we got to go, we got to go. And I'm like, why? I had to keep us moving, you know? And then we went to a Cuban restaurant. That was really good. I didn't eat there. Why? The Cuban menu did not have any offerings for my vegetarian diet. I'm sorry. It was really good. I did have some of the plantain chips though. They were good. Those were good. Yeah. So I enjoyed that. And when we were there, I saw baby chicks. That was fun because there were roosters everywhere. Yeah, no one told me about roosters in Key West. That was, those were so cool. Yeah. And then we went to a gift shop. And you made us go to a CVS because you forgot sunglasses and sunscreen. Wrong. I bought my sunglasses at the gift shop. Thank you. We went to a gift shop in CVS because lunchbox forgot mouthwash, sunscreen, and sunglasses. And he also bought two shirts, one of which he is wearing right now. Yeah, I bought those from the gift shop. I bought the mouthwash and the sunscreen from Walgreens

11:18or CVS, whatever one it was. And I should have bought, what else do I need? That's all I needed. No, that's all you needed, but you needed something. So we had to stop in a CVS. Yeah, because I didn't have sunscreen. I didn't realize you needed a sunscreen on a boat. Yeah. And you wouldn't go to the checkout. You wouldn't do the self checkout. I don't work there. Yeah, and I don't understand that. Like, you're so against the times. No, you know why? They don't give me a discount for checking myself out. No, but it helps you move faster if you do self checkout. Sorry. If you do self checkout, you know what you're doing? What am I doing? You're taking a job away from somebody. No, but sometimes I go to the people. I just do both. I do whichever one's faster. No. Yeah. If the people are doing it manually are faster, I'm going to them. If the self checkout is empty, I'm going there. Never doing it. I'm just helping with the efficiency of the store. Well, they'll learn that they need to get more cash years in there. If you want to make them send a message, that's how you send a message. I don't really care to send a message, though.

12:18I just want to know. So you don't care about other people having a job. I want to get my groceries and leave. Sorry, I'm here to support American people. American jobs. Oh, is that what that is? Yeah. You just don't want to do it because you're not getting paid to do it. So you want to make somebody else do it. Well, correct. Yeah. Why would I do something that they're paying someone to do? I don't know. I kind of also find it fun. You don't have to find it fun to scan the... I like getting the little gun out and... Doop doop doop doop doop. No, I used to do that. Man, I've been there. That was in my past life. I did that. I've been there. So you're too bougie to be fun. No, I'm not too bougie to be fun. I'm trying to respect sensitive Sally over here that works at the cashier. I want her to work her job. Why is she sensitive? Well, because she's emotional. Because she sees people going to the self checkout and she's like, I'm going to lose my job. I'm going to lose my job. I don't know. I don't know. I wish you would come over to me. I think we're always going to need both. I really do. I don't. You don't need self checkout. You really don't need it. And here's what's annoying. Like at the airport in Nashville.

13:19I go in there to buy some snacks, right? Oh, like one of the gas stations in there. Convenient stores. Whatever. And I walk up to the register and it's self checkout only. But they have a woman sitting there hitting the buttons for you. If she's hitting the buttons, why shouldn't she just check me out? Yeah, see, that is weird. I'll take that. I'll take that. She's like, oh, here, here. All right, nice scan this item. Scan this. I'm like, why don't you just check me out? What are we doing? I wonder if the reason why is, because they don't work the same hour. So the late night or the early morning flights, they don't have somebody working. So they're just in there for some of it. No, they have to have someone working. I don't know. That is dumb. Just do one or the other in those situations. Right. You have an employee there hitting buttons and I'm like, what? I just so stupid. Very annoying. But I'll keep using self checkout, so. Okay. You hate American people having American jobs. I don't. Sorry. Anybody having jobs? You hear that guys? If you're a cashier anywhere, Morgan wants you to lose your job. That's not true.

14:19There's also cashier. You could be a cashier at Buffalo Wildlings, like I did. There's other cashier jobs. You can't be a cashier at Buffalo Wildlings. I literally was. I took takeouts. No, I was a host. And then I did takeout orders and then I did expo. And then I was a waitress. But takeout orders is a cashier. You stand at the counter. You take takeout orders. You get food and you deal with the money. It's a cashier. Well, soon you'll just be ordering on that. People do order on that and they also handle that. So like jobs have all been changed. Okay. You were so mad about that. I was mad about that. But then yeah, then we got back on the boat and we were on the boat and where'd we go? Yeah, then we were at sea one day. Yeah. And we did a whole gosh. The karaoke competition I've been hosting has been crazy. We got some talented people on the boat. Yeah, I watched it one night. You saw Sushi Man. Who? Well, so his name's Devon. But he was upstairs eating sushi when I called his name. Yeah, he's the one you posted a video of. It was Devon. He was singing Sealo Green. No, oh, I didn't know that. I saw him from the, I was in.

15:20What do you call that, the, um, rafters? Yeah, I was up top, like looking over the boat and you could see down in the middle and that's when I saw him when he was singing. Yeah, he's, he's, he's what I call sushi man because he was up eating sushi when he got called to come singing. I made him stop eating sushi to come sing. So Devon aka sushi man, he's solid. Man, maybe I need to have sushi tonight, man. You need some sushi in your life? I don't know. I'm just saying like I, I mean, I've been eating the buffet and I mean, it's great. You're a hater of the buffet. No, I just, it's not that I'm a hater. It's just you can only eat the buffet so many times in a row. It's true. There's variety in there though. You could, you keep getting the same thing as the problem. Every time I go, I try and get something different. Mix it up. Yeah, there's not, I mean, I don't know. I'm just saying like I like a, I like a meal. Like I don't know, sushi sounds good. We're on a boat. They probably catch it over the edge, reel it in and then take it into the sushi restaurant. Yeah, that's exactly what they're doing. And so I mean, I think that's how it tastes really good. Okay. Well, I mean, you do love the really nice dining restaurant

16:22because they allow you to get two of things that you love. Like this is your, that year is your prime location because you can get two on trades. You can get two apps. You can get two dessert. I did get two butternut squash soups last night and it was so good. I was like, hmm, give me another one of them in my tummy. Oh, hmm, hmm. This is turning to like only fans ASMR of food. No, I was just really good. That's all. And then another day where there you got two on trades. Well, they had a quarter. I don't know what that is. It was a fish. I'd never had it before. And so I wanted to know what it tastes like. And since I didn't have to pay for it, I was like, hey, let me get something like a quarter, please. Yeah, and then you had two desserts last night. I did. See? You thrive in the dining room. I had two, I had the peach cobbler. And then I also had the, what was it? Spongebob cake? Something like that. Oh, yeah, the strawberry. Oh, oh, the little one. Yeah, but the Spongebob one my favorite.

17:23I was thinking more angel food cake. It was angel food cake. That's what it was. But I didn't like all the icing on it. I just wanted the spongy stuff. That will always be weird to me that you don't like icing. It's like the best part of a dessert. I disagree. But you also, your favorite dessert is cheesecake. Wow, so good. And they have it actually, I mean, they had cheesecake one night. One night, isn't it? Like, what are we doing? Cheesecakes should be available every night for dessert, every night. You know what they have in mixing up, though, is the pastries in the morning? Still not that good. But like, I have the chocolate croissant that's bomb. But I'm not a big pastry guy. Yeah, I'm not a pastry. Yeah, you like pastries, you like the bread. I'm like, eh, you know what I mean? I give me some cheese a cake. The cheese a cake? Yeah. And I will say that I did one night, I was in the casino. Wait, hold on. We're gonna go into the casino talk. We're gonna take a break, though, and then I'll let you go off on casino talk. All right, you talking? I'm gonna pee, and I'll be back. Well, don't pee. We just have like a five-second break. Well, yeah, you're gonna have to fill a buster because I'm gonna pee in my pants. Okay, we're gonna take a quick break.

18:24We'll be right back. And you fill a buster, I'm going pee. Pfft. Hey, this is Well Zadams with By Order of the Faithfuls podcast alongside my fellow Faithfuls and co-hosts, Tamra Judge and Laura's Catania. The three of us have been watching the season of the traders. And we've been inside that castle. So we have insight unlike many others. This season of the traders may be the best we've ever seen. Listen to By Order of the Faithfuls on America's number one podcast network, I Heart. Follow By Order of the Faithfuls and start listening on the free I Heart Radio app today. Pfft. Okay, let's talk about the casino stuff because I feel like you've spent majority of your time in the casino. Ah, I mean, majority, no, but did I spend some time in the casino? Yes. I feel like 40, 60. Yeah, I mean, it's been great. It's a lot of fun, you know, like teaching listeners how to win money, you know, me being their guide, their leader, their, what do you call them, um,

19:24Coach? Yeah, oh, uh, yeah, coach is going to be a word to you. Coach is probably a better word. So yeah, one night I sat, I went in there and played some craps and that didn't go so well. The next night I went in and played, what did I play? Roulette hit a couple of numbers, then I had to go pee. Just like I just went pee now and, um, this one guy that I played, Damon was his name. He was like, hey, man, we're going to hit the craps table. I was like, yeah, let's hit the craps table. I'll be right back, man, I'll be right back. And I went to the bathroom. And then as I was walking back in, there was people sitting in a blackjack table like, oh, lunch sit down with us, sit down with us. That's when your heart is torn. You're like, do you go back to Damon, her do you go to these new listeners, you know, like you haven't talked to and you got to make a split second decision. And so I sat down with these listeners and I was teaching them how to play blackjack and we played. And next thing I know I'd been there for three hours. And they came up and they said, oh, guys, just so you know, we're going to be shutting down this table in 20 minutes. And I was like, what? And I looked around, we were the only ones

20:24left in the casino. You were just having yourself a time, were you up, were you hot? It was 2 a.m. Yeah, but were you hot like were you making money? I was doing my best too. I was making them money and that's the most important part is making them money. Oh, is it? Yeah, and so it was 2 a.m. and I was like, guys, I got to go to bed. I got to go to bed. And so I left the casino at 2 a.m. Didn't realize there was 2 a.m. That's what happens when you're on a boat. And hey, shout out to Damon because him and his wife are awesome and they gave us both money, which we both lost. Yeah, I wouldn't include that part about. Why? Well, I didn't want to tell him about that. We have to shout out to them because they're awesome. They love the casino. Big casino fans. Yeah, you know, it's terrible those that we don't know the wife's name. I know, I need to go ask her. I saw her again. Yeah, and you didn't ask her. No, but we're running to do this. We're trying to get it done. Yeah, that's what I asked her. Okay, because it's one of those awkward times. It's like, you've talked to them so much that maybe you should know their name but then you don't. In all fairness though, we've met over 1,000 people just in the last few days. So here's the thing. I am shocked.

21:26I've talked to so many people. And I'm like, oh, we've had to have met everybody now. And they're like, oh my gosh, finally I get to meet you. And I'm like, what? How have I not met everybody? How have I not met everybody on this boat? I know. Or people come up and they're like, I finally found you. I was like, really up and everywhere. I mean, everywhere man, I've been everywhere man. Yeah, literally. And that's what they'll come up and say. And I'm just shocked that we haven't found each other yet. Yeah, like, man, this lady has been walking some laps. She is moving. Yeah, but this boat is 15 levels. Yeah. There's over 2,000 people on it. So there's a lot of people to go through even in seven days. Yeah, that's true. On the last day, I'm gonna post on Instagram and be like, hey, I'm gonna be right here if you're on this boat. If you've not met me, come say hello. You just want to go sit in the library together? That's what I was gonna do. Okay, we can do that. On our last day at sea before we disembarked. I think it'll be sad. I think we'll be sad to leave when it actually is over. Will we? I think we'll be tired and ready to go home and sleep. But I think we'll be sad to be, you know, a warm weather on a boat.

22:26Yeah, but I don't get to go home and sleep. I have three kids. Yeah, you may need a vacation from the vacation. Right. And I mean, shout out to my wife, you know, she's at home and she did come down with strep throat and my middle child once again, came down with strep throat. So she was battling that, trying to get kids. The baseball practice, getting to birthday parties, basketball tournaments. So yeah. I am impressed. You have not lost your voice yet and you haven't gotten sick yet. Well, I don't ever get sick. Or either or. You just kind of always want one of vacation happens. So kind of open. You're doing good this time. Like before I go to bed, I drink a lot of water so I can hopefully my voice will be okay. But the only problem with that is, let me tell you, I have to get up five times every night to pee, at least. Then why don't you start doing it in the morning when you first wake up instead of right before you go to bed? I feel like it needs to be hydrated. My vocal cords need to be hydrated while I sleep. Well, I mean, you got saliva pumped in there, yeah? Hey, there goes Brandy. She won a thousand dollars for him, Bingo. Brandy, shout out.

23:27She's walking with her mom. Oh, we have had a lot of, we've had a lot of activities. I've been doing karaoke, blackjack. I did a morning walk. What have you been doing all your activities? I have no idea. You can list them off. No, I really don't know. You don't know. I did Tequila, Sunrise, Bingo, and that was a packed house, packed. Yeah, I think because your Bingo was so packed, they're moving mine that's happening on the last day to the theater. Yeah, because there was not enough room in that room and they had to, these guys were coming with wheelies and they had chairs and they were wheeling them in, throwing them down, running down, getting more chairs, bringing them in, it was wild. And we gave away, it was a lot of fun. I thought Bingo was pretty fun. What's been your favorite so far? Oh, man, let me think. The blackjack tournament has been my favorite. Yeah, that's been really fun. Like the participation with everybody, it's been fun. Yes, because what I like about it is it's all fun and it's, you know, whatever. Someone's gonna win money in it. But at the same time, they're having fun, letting the players flip the card of the dealer,

24:29like when they need the dealer to bust, they slide it over to and they let it flip it over for the table. I think that's fun. Instead of being very rigid and being like, no, we gotta do it very professionally. And only the dealer can touch the cards. Oh yeah, no, shout out to Terry. Terry's my favorite dealer. Liz has been, she was great the first couple days. That has been my favorite. The people gathered around and cheering. And then like the night I was in the casino this, third night, I didn't even play, but Amy sat down at a blackjack table and I was her coach and we had a lot of people in there and we were cheering and going crazy and Amy has winning money. Probably owes me half if I'm saying myself because I was the coach. And that was a lot of fun. So I just like that kind of stuff. Okay, maybe we need to go back in there just for fun's one time, not, because we've been in there a lot for the tournament. Yeah, but your karaoke was fun. The first night I went, I didn't go the second night. Yeah, that was super fun. What else has been fun? The drinks have been fun. All the people giving you a penny of coladas,

25:30everybody thinks you only like penny of coladas now. I know, I know, because we were, well, no, we were doing a Q&A on stage by the pool. And I mean, I'm not really, I don't know how it works, but when you're on a boat at the beach like this, I feel like a penny of colada, or like when you're at the beach, a penny of colada feels like the perfect drink. So I just wanted a penny of colada. Now people think that's all I drink and they keep bringing me penny of coladas and I'm my guys. I just wanted it by the boat, man. I don't need it when I'm playing Blackjack. You know what I mean? How many do you think you've had now? Oh my God, 52,000. So many penny. And you know what, hot take, I hate penny coladas. They taste like suntan lotion to me. That's your COVID. I don't think so. No it is. No, it tastes like, what's, what is your son, the beach bump? Yeah, it tastes like beach bump suntan lotion for like a penny of coladas. No, penny coladas are, they're so good when you're sitting by the pool or the beach and you're just like, ah, Evan. And you know what, somebody told me to try Miami Vice because I don't like penny coladas.

26:31So maybe I'm going to attempt that, which is I guess a penny of colada mixed with something else. But I will say the one thing we have to stop Martinez is talking to you from Seattle. The hot shots. Like if you're going to order, like if you're going to be nice and order me a shot, make sure it's chilled. Hold on, you don't get to decide. No, you do, you do. What somebody gives you and they're giving you a drink for free. That's not how that works. No, I'm 44 years old now. Okay. If you bring me a warm shot, I mean, I'm not trying to be a diva, but I'm going to be like, you are being a diva. Bye. Okay, but then you can't ask for things for free. You take with what you get when it's free. Because these people, like they bring me to Keelah shots when I'm hosting things and I'm like, all right, yeah, I'll do it. And it's like, oh my God, that it's warm. Who wants a warm shot? I understand when you're 21 and you're 18 and you're doing shots and there's no choice. You don't even know what chilled is. But now that we're 44, chill the shot. The vodka shot I have was pretty, it was like in between, it wasn't warm, it wasn't cold.

27:31Oh, my, my Keelah shots have been warm. Every single one of them have been warm. That's probably on purpose, honestly. And I'm like, oh, oh. But then you have to just say no. And then you don't get free drinks anymore. I was introducing Cooper Allen, right? And this guy brings me a shot on stage. I'm like, all right, cheers to the boat. And I was like, cheers. And I'm like, I don't even need a lime. And I threw the lime in the crowd, right? And I didn't realize it was warm at this time and I took the shot and I'm like, oh my god, I couldn't use that lime. I couldn't use that lime. I was like, it was really bad. You're trying to be cool guy. I was trying to be cool guy and I regretted it a big time. Well, I'm glad you're having fun. How much do you think of drink, more than normal? You're not really a big drinker anymore. More than normal, more than what I would regularly drink on a Tuesday, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, when's the last time you think you've drank this much? I don't know. I haven't been on a vacation like this in a long time. I know, like without kids. Right. So I don't know. It's been a long, long time. Long, long time. I love you, long time. I've had one strawberry decorate when we went to

28:34when we were on NASA. Oh. Yeah. So that was our adventure on NASA's. We got off the boat and we went to Queen's staircase. I mean, walked. It's like these 60 staircase. It's supposed to be this national monument in NASA, which was really cool. Yeah. It was a cool spot. But we cheated. We went from top to bottom. Apparently we were supposed to go from bottom to top. Yeah. We did not. We didn't earn it. We went to the beach. We went to cabbage beach where lunchbox was just diving in the big waves. Let me tell you, these were 12 footers over my head. Right. Would you say 12 feet? I don't know. I don't know. They were huge. They were huge. Yeah. But they were over my head, guys. They were. It was kicking my ass. And he was like a little kid in the waves. He was just like diving in him, jumping in him. And then he'd look at me on the beach like, oh, mom, what? You watching? Is this fun? Like just a little kid? No, no, no. Every time. I would go for about 15 minutes and be like, oh, it's Morgan's still there. I just want to make sure she didn't get kidnapped because I don't know what goes on down here. And there's a couple times I looked up and Morgan was gone. I was like, oh, where'd she go? I sat in the same spot the entire time.

29:34I know that there was people blocking you a couple times. Well, and you kept moving in the waves. You'd go different directions. Yeah, that's what I found out is that I would move. And I was like, oh, she's down the beach. That's how I line up where I was supposed to be as I'd look for you. Oh, I need to go back that way. It was funny. It really reminded me of like a kid looking for their parents back on the beach. Like, are you watching what I'm doing? This is cool. I was like lunchbox and I was being the mom because I did not get in the ocean that day. I wish I would have. Yeah, I was worried our stuff was going to get stolen. Honestly. See, that's where you need to quit worrying so much. Why? That's a fair thing to, I've not used to this area. Neither am I. Yeah, and you're just going to leave our wallets, our phones, everything we need to get back on the boat. Covered up with a shirt. Okay, they could take the whole thing. I was super annoyed. Do you know what beach life is about? It's not about stealing. It's about relaxing. You know how much stealing happens on the beach? None. A lot. None. You've never seen those people in metal detectors. They like purposefully go and steal people's money. No, they don't. That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. They're looking for buried treasure.

30:36Yeah, okay, okay. You tell yourself that. I mean, look, I love my shoes. You never watched Baywatch? They go and they put like coolers on top of things and steal stuff. Did you really just reference Baywatch as your, your barometer? Yes. Do you know what Baywatch is? Yeah, a show. Not real. Okay, but people still steal on the beach. It's a real thing. I was just kind of making a joke. I mean, because I dropped my sandals somewhere and we were packing up to go and you're like, where are your shoes? And I was like, um. Well, nobody's going to steal sandals. Can I be honest? I totally forgot where I put them. I thought they got washed away in the ocean. I thought they did do first thing. Yeah. And I was like, oh, damn, this is going to be a long day. They're not trying to steal those. They're trying to steal like a bag. Like I had a straight up purse. I would they not steal my brand new sandals? Because they don't care. Those aren't valuable to them. They could be. You know, it's valuable on iPhone. I cost $1,000 or money in a wallet or a credit card or a passport. They can take my ID and run across the border for all I know. Okay. I'm just saying like I was a little worried about you. Hey, I got in the beach when we were in Key West.

31:39For three minutes. No, I was in there. I swam out to the rocks. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And I was out there for a while. But then Eddie said he got stung. I was like, okay, I'm leaving. But did he really? I don't know. He says he did. He just makes things up. Make himself sound tough. Anyways, the one drink I did had was after we went to the beach in NASA, I went and had a strawberry daiquiri at the dollar bill bar. I always called the bearded clam. Yeah. That was really good. The strawberry daiquiri was not. No, because I put it in straight syrup. It was not strawberry in sight. I know. That was your problem. I know. I had like three sips. Yeah. Um, but I liked my. What was it called? Conch? Conch? Yeah. You're like fried conch. It was really good. Yeah. It was really good. I like some of that when we get to Beneman, Beneman, Beneman, Benemanamy. Ben? Any. Benminny. There you go. I got it. Benminny. Okay. Benamy. We were so close. It really feels like the friends episode every time I try and teach you, Benminny. It's tough word.

32:39We're going to take a break and we'll be right back. All right. Hey, this is Wells Adams with Buy Order of the Faithfuls podcast alongside my fellow Faithfuls and co-hosts, Tamra Judge and Dolores Catania. The three of us have been watching the season of the Traders and we've been inside that castle. So we have insight unlike many others. This season of the Traders may be the best we've ever seen. Listen to Buy Order of the Faithfuls on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. All right. So now past NASA, we're back on the ship and this is where we are. This is kind of the moment in time. We haven't reached Benminny yet by the time we're recording this. So we're just at sea today. We get to hang out, eat food. You know how much ice cream I've eaten lunch? A lot. Like every time I see you, you have ice cream. I know. You know how cool it is to just have software available all the time?

33:40Pretty cool because you're taking advantage of it. Have you not eaten any ice cream? I, two things ice cream. First one, not so good. Second one, cherry, pretty good. It's so good. There's one guy, gosh, what's his name? He's on a motorized wheelchair. Man, that dude is on the ice cream. He has it like six times a day. You know what? But like this is the time. You get free ice cream on a cruise ship. You paid for it. I mean, the ice cream lady sees him at breakfast and she's like, hey, you ready for your ice cream? Or she sees him in the hall and she's like, ice cream's waiting for you. I aspire to be this man on the scooter. Yeah, he's pretty cool. I wish I remembered his name. You're not my really good at names, but again, we've met a lot of people. I was going to say here, here the first day, I was nailing people. But then when they change clothes, he's a little shady. Or if you meet him and they didn't have sunglasses on, now all of a sudden they have sunglasses on. Yeah, it's hard. You got a few identities when you're on a cruise ship. Yeah, I remember Franny and Kathy, we met them the first day at lunch.

34:40And there's a guy, a GTS. Have you met him? He did meet him. He was in the cool shirt at Keith Urban and he had glasses in the big gold chain. Oh, good time, Kenny. Oh. Good time, Scotty. Good time, Scotty. He's GTS. Yeah, he bought me these underwear. Okay. He bought you. Aren't that feels weird? Yeah, but it's really a swimsuit. Oh, well, swimsuit and underwear are vastly different. Yeah. But does he not think I have swimsuit? I think he's worried that you don't have enough clothes. Oh. He gave you a small. No, he got me an extra large. What the heck? What's worse? What's worse? If he would have got you an extra small or an extra large? I don't know. How do I take this back? I don't know where it came from. Oh, you don't think it was on the boat? Maybe. I don't know. Did you ask him? No, he just handed it to me. He goes, now we can match. Oh, that's why he bought him for you wanting to match with you. Right. But the problem is I'm going to need a rope to keep him up. Just go tell him. He'll be happy to help. He said he's vying for the best cruiser award. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, there's some good ones. I know.

35:40I was trying to think about that. You know who my favorite is so far. Who? You saw her when she was at karaoke. She's been at karaoke both times. And she's also in a scooter but she also has a cane. And she gets up and she dances. I need to figure out her name. Because she is the life of the party. As soon as she starts dancing, everybody else starts dancing. Yeah. So she's up top for me right now. Okay. And Kathy, who is playing poker? It's not poker Morgan. You call poker one more time. I'm going to talk you off the boat. It's blackjack. Wait, what's the difference between poker and blackjack? A big difference. Is poker a game? Yes. I thought I just thought all game card games were poker. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I really did. You're telling me poker itself is a game. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Guys, this is what I deal with guys. This is what I deal with. I mean, I know like the overarching is gambling. But like I really thought poker was all card games. I did not realize poker itself was one specific game. Yeah. Very sorry. There's different types of poker. Okay. Maybe that's what I know. There's like blackjack and Texas home. But I thought they were all under the umbrella of poker.

36:41No. No. This is a little weird on my brain right now. Yeah. Okay. Got it. So we have poker. We got blackjack. We got Texas. Hold them. Okay. Yeah. Okay. So blackjack. Kathy was playing blackjack. She's also in my running. Yeah. Who's her daughter? Gosh. I don't know. I know. I forgot. I forgot her daughter's name. Dang. I met her the first night playing Crap's. Ah, forget. And Damon and his wife, which we got figured out her name. We've already gave them shout out. I know. But they're still. I'm talking about best cruisers. We've got so far. Well, I don't know. Lexa was pretty good. Her and her mom. I played blackjack with them all night. Their sister was up in bed. And so I see her every time. And I see her sister now. I'm like, hey, you missed the best night of the cruise. You're so you know. She's like. There was a woman also during karaoke that sang Red Solo Cup. Yeah. She was pretty cool. What was her name? I don't know. Bimini. Bimini.

37:41Miss Bimini. Okay. What else have we missed? We got a little bit longer to go. I'll tell you what. I'm not really an ocean guy. Yeah. I don't like the beach. I'm with you. See that you were giving me a hard time for us leaving. I'm not good at just like sitting on the beach. We would have had an activity planned like jet skiing or pair or sail. No, no, swim in the water. Yeah. That doesn't entertain me for long enough. I need an activity. But I will say the weather in Nassau, it was not hot. And the water was perfection. I could get along with that kind of beach day. But if it gets any hotter, I don't want to be out there. Yeah. Because there's no shade. But that water felt amazing. And the water was so like blue. It was different shades of blue. It was you to full. Read my lips. You to full. Well, I can't really read your lips. They don't see you right now. I know it's a joke. Yeah. But it was multiple colors.

38:41We had like a deep blue. There was a teal and like a light blue. Yeah, and being out. These two dudes out here are taking model pictures. They've been taking pictures for the last 30 minutes right there. Oh, is there like a tripod setup right there? Probably. Yeah, that's pretty funny. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's a tripod. Are they doing a TikTok? Oh, there's another dude taking the picture. Yeah. It's funny because of where we're out in the studio. We can see a lot of things happening. There's a track outside of here. There's lawn chairs. There's a basketball court. Yeah. It's kind of cruising. It's fun people watching. Yeah. Oh, they're doing TikTok. They're doing TikTok. Oh, we're watching it. They are doing a TikTok. This is going to make it to our feed. Oh, my gosh. I feel like I should interrupt this and just like open. You know, here. Let me see something. Well, don't ruin their TikTok. Yeah, I'm not going to ruin it. I'm just going to show up in the door. And see if they laugh. Yeah. Did I see you? Yeah, I see you. The one guy's walking away. Oh, my God. Did they have magic outfits? No, I'll have like a whole eye in shirts off. Okay. I think they might be worker like employees on the ship.

39:48Okay. I haven't seen them. So maybe they're- That makes sense. They're making a fun. That's hilarious. That's really good. We need to see what they're doing. Maybe we can make one of that. If you are listening to this, we'll be down with the cruise. Yeah. We need to make some more videos. I know. I told you what we should do. Which one? Me throwing you in the pool. You never suggested that. That'd be a great one. No. Okay. Okay. We need to come up with some. That's the thing that we haven't done. Man, we haven't done the walkie talkies at all. I know. I brought walkie talkies for us. And guys- I need you to charge mine. You already- It's already dead? Yeah. I left it on the whole time. Why do I need to turn it off? Well, I just realized it. I just realized it when I went into my room and it was beeping and me- And me and I'm like, oh, I forgot to turn it off. Okay. I'll charge it. But we only have like two more days to use it. I know. We haven't been good at it. But it threw me off because there's other people on the channel on the boat. We haven't really freaked you out. Yeah. And I was like, are we on- Like the employees' channel? We shouldn't be on the walkie talkies. Because the first day we got on, I was in my room and I got on there and I said, oh,

40:51there's the captain coming over there. We're ready for departure. And Morgan freaked out. She immediately texted me, goes, oh, my God. Oh, my God. We're on the captain's channel. Did you hear that? That was the captain. And I was like, I did hear it. Oh, my gosh. We're going to get thrown off the boat. She goes, but they said to bring walkie talkies. Oh, no. Maybe we need to change channels. And then you five minutes later were like, that was me. I was so worried we were going to get thrown off the boat. I know. I know. It was really good. Oh, yeah. What else about the boat? Stuff goes on all night. That's what's crazy. Yeah. I've been going to bed early. Keith Irvon was awesome. Oh, that lady is still walking, dude. She is moving. Go. Calm down. Keith Irvon was great. Scottie McCree was really good. Who else was there? I'm excited to see Lee and Rhymes. I haven't seen her yet. Yeah. Parmley's on the boat now. Oh, yeah. The Parmley moment's good. Yeah. And the drunk girl that got on stage with Scottie McCree. I guess she's still on the boat. I don't know. I assume in the same one that also was drunk and got on Bobby's first show.

41:52I'm assuming they're all on the boat still. I think you can get thrown off for being drunk. You might not. I don't know. You may get thrown in like the downstairs jail for a minute. Or do they lock you in your room? Think about your decisions. Yeah. That's good. That's time to reflect. Yeah. Give you like 10 hours of rest and come back. No reflection. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what else we did. Keith Urban was awesome. He gave his guitar to someone in the crowd. Oh, and I talked to her. The one who got it. I can't. I don't know her name. I'm really bad at it. I thought it was a dude. No. And my favorite thing is Morgan. The first thing she says is how are they going to get that guitar home? And you know what's funny? Hold on. The first reaction should be, oh my god, they got a Keith Urban guitar. Not how are they going to get that home? Okay. First of all, I'm so used to have gone to a lot of Keith Urban shows and he always gives away a guitar. This is like his thing. Second of all, she came up to me at your bingo. I was like, hey, I'm the one who got the guitar. How do I get it home? Did she really? Not getting. I was like, oh, I was thinking about this last night. I was like, you need a guitar case and you need to check that.

42:53So she's going to try and figure it out when we get back to Florida. She's really concerned about how she's going to get it back. Where did she live? I don't know. I didn't ask that part. But they're on a flight. They have to fly. That could be her carry on luggage. Yeah, but she's on Delta. And Delta is different than like Southwest. I've seen people check, you know, carry on their guitars. And it's not been an issue. I've never seen that on a Delta flight. Huh. So. I'm sure there's a store in Fort Lauderdale. I would think that she could, you know, ship it like FedEx. Yeah. Or I told her just if she could buy a hard guitar case, like a cheap one somewhere. Yeah. And just throw it in that and check the bag. Or should you give it to me? No. No, I'm then I'd get it to her. No, you wouldn't. We'd be in the same situation as like the girl we saw who you gave the Jordan Davis lyrics that took you like eight years. I mean, nine year and two months to mail it to her. Yeah. So we're not going to do that. But she was excited. Oh, we got Colton from Regina is here. He's on the ship. Oh, yeah, you told us. Yeah. That was like the first day we met him. Yeah. I just liked it. He was from Regina. So I remember his name.

43:53Yeah, he had to tell us. So we knew it was a real city. Yeah, and I met people from New Hampshire because we didn't think New Hampshire was real. Don't look wee in there. I knew. A lot of people from Delaware, a lot of people from Ohio, Oklahoma. We've had people from Wichita, which has been cool. Yeah. I met a couple from El Paso. Yeah. Yeah. They met Navaleen and then they moved to El Paso because that's where she's from. Oh, I met a couple from Alaska. That one was crazy. I met a woman from Hawaii. Yeah. But see, Alaska's crazy because it's like polar opposite. Hawaii. It's a long way. It is a long way. But like Alaska, the environment, cold, snowy mountain weather. Yeah. And they come down here to the ocean. Bonita. She was at Bingo, I think. She yelled at me. She was like, I'm still Bonita. And I was like, oh, my bad. Because I thought she was about to have been gone. I was like, what's your name? She goes, still Bonita. Because I asked her a minute ago what her name was. And I came back around the room and I saw her standing. And I thought I hadn't talked to her yet. My bad. That's on me. Another favorite of mine is somebody you heard overheard you complaining about having to do baskets with me. And she was like, you wasn't lying with that cheese. I liked her. She was funny.

44:53Yeah. So it's been great. I mean, it's been really fun. I don't know. I'm having fun. I'm definitely tired. Tired. And I do miss my Remy and Hazel. Thank you. My babies. My girls. No, don't call them your girls. It's such fun. They're not my girls. It's just easier to say that, you know? No, it's not. Say my pets. No, that's not as fun. Okay. I like what I want to say. Yeah. I mean, I tried to face down my kids. They're like, no, we don't want to face time. Okay, cool, man. They don't mess you up. I was like, you guys want to see the ocean. Now we're good. All right. Good talk. Good talk. Is your wife ready for you to come home? Probably. I mean, we haven't really talked that much. I mean, I don't have a lot of time. You can't call. Like the cell phones don't work. You can only face time. Only face time. And so when I have time, they have something going on or when they want to face time, I'm doing something. And so it's just tough, man. It's a rough life out here on this open seas. I know. Whenever I face time, my fiancee, I just fall asleep. And he's like, dude, just go to bed. We did see dolphins. We did a brief moment. Morgan and I were eating lunch. And me with an eagle eye saw the pod of dolphins.

45:56Whoa. Out of the water. Is that supposed to be like their little fins? Yeah, that's the middle of the water. And then that's him going back in the water. Are they still working on the TikTok back there? No, that's a guy with a guitar. Oh. Okay. All right. We've had a good time up here. Yeah, anything else? Nothing that I can think of. We still have a few more days to go though, so. Yeah. I mean, stuff's going to happen, man. Mm-hmm. Stuff's going to happen on this boat. It's crazy. Been in me. Been in me. Bim in me. Bim in me. Bim in me. Bim in me. There you go. Tomorrow. We have another day at sea and then we're done. Yeah. Leigh Bryce tomorrow. Yeah. Right. And we got Parmaly and we got Cassie Action. I think those are in Leigh Ann Rimes. Yeah. Oh. Parmaly's doing something. Someone's renewing their vows. They're doing it out there in the... No, that's... Thelma and James are doing that. The Val Renewal? Is Parmaly doing it too? Both, maybe? Yeah, man. I was going to try to watch that, but I don't think we're going to make it. What time is it at? It's three. Oh, well, we can go here soon. We'll get there. We'll stop this and we're going to answer questions we'll be done. Five, four minutes. We had to get there in four minutes. Well, the boat's really small, you know? Yeah, but we had to do questions. And, you know, you can't answer a question short answer.

46:57Don't look at me. It's a you problem. You got a ramble on and on and on and on and on. Like run on. Yes. You know who ramble on and on is lunchbox. You're not trying to get them to someplace. We stop like 80 times. Yeah. And you have to tell everybody's entire life story. You know why? Because people want to talk to me and they're like, hey, your fame is... I'm like, I know. You want to hear about my life story and I tell them. And so we're here on the boat to do. It's telling my life story every two minutes. That's exactly why we're here to hear your life story. Yeah. I think it's more to say, hi, hang out, have fun. Yeah. That too. Okay. Yeah. All right. Well, we're going to get out of here. All right, man. Hey, we're out here in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I mean, we may be in the Indian Ocean by now. I don't think that's how that works. Yeah, you got to go for motion motion. Yeah, but we literally have... We can see the coastline of Bimini. Oh, we're not in the Indian Ocean anymore. So we're out of the Indian Ocean. We're back in the way. We never went to the Indian Ocean. I don't know. That lake... We've literally been walking for an hour. We have been by Florida this entire time. No. We have not left the area. Okay. Well, bye from the middle of the ocean.

47:58Yeah, which ocean we are unclear on, guys. We are unclear. Don't put me in that category. We are unclear on what ocean, man. All right. Thanks for being here. I mean, this is supposed to be my downtime on the boat. And here I am working again. So I'm complaining. You're having fun. No, I'm saying on the boat. I'm supposed to be chilling right now. But no, I'm up here working. Like always, man. This is kind of chilling. We're just talking. Rehation. Living it up. Talking about memes. I'm probably got so many more stories, but I can't remember them. I know there's a lot that has happened. But we can always debrief further when we get back. All right. For now. This is where we leave you guys. I got to get out. Oh. Boy. Okay. Goodbye, everybody. Goodbye. That's the best bits of the week with Morgan. Thanks for listening. Be sure to check out the other two parts this weekend. Go follow the show on all social platforms. To submit your listener questions for next week's episode. Hey, this is Wells Adams with by order of the Faithfuls podcast alongside my fellow Faithfuls and co-hosts, Tamra Judge and Laura's Catania.

48:58The three of us have been watching the season of the traders. And we've been inside that castle. So we have insight unlike many others. This season of the traders may be the best we've ever seen. Listen to by order the Faithfuls on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an I Heart Podcast. Guaranteed Human. Listen to by order the Faithfuls on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an I Heart Podcast. Guaranteed Human. Listen to by order the Faithfuls on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.