Love Letters To Kellie – Abandoning Parents?

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1:03Alright, we got to that make me crazy coming up here in about five minutes or so. Uh, maybe 10? Five, eight hundred, five, four, three, thirty, five, forty-eight if you want to get yours in. But let's get into it with our love expert. Love letters. Love letters to Kelly. Dear Kelly, you are the love expert. I am. I've been dating my boyfriend for a year now. I love him so much and I know that he's the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with. But he lives three hours away. I do plan to move in with him by next August. I'm the youngest of four in my family. And for the first 27 years of my life, I was single, introverted, and isolated from the world. My parents were my everything. I depended on them for so much. I depended on them so much that if they passed away, I wouldn't know how to live with myself. But then I broke out of it and I went through a rebellious phase of 28. I started going on dates. I got into huge fights with my parents because I was supposed to be their baby girl still and I grew resentful. When they gave me the space that I needed, I still live with them, but I'm working on moving out on my own for a bit to get that independence. I'm the only one that still lives close to them out of my siblings. But then I got the news today that my dad may have cancer.

2:04Kelly, my parents won't be able to take care of themselves and they won't be able to go to doctors appointments by themselves. I don't know what to do. I can't move in and live with my boyfriend if my parents don't have anyone to bring them to their appointments. But my parents won't leave their home. I know it's selfish. I know I'm selfish, but I do want to leave. But if I do, I feel like I'm abandoning my parents. And if I don't, my boyfriend and I may break up because he's still very badly wants to move on to the next step in our relationship. He's been looking for his forever person and so have I. So this puts a stop in those plans. What should I do? Well, is there not an option for him to move to where you are? That's my first question. My second question is, have you talked to your parents about what their wishes are? I mean, a lot of parents might not want to put that burden on you. You know, you say you're the baby and that you've established them, you're trying to establish them independence. But it's a conversation you need to have with your parents and your siblings. Because I mean, it's unfortunate that it's not unfortunate. That's not the word. It's a blessing, I think, to be able to take care of your parents when they get to that stage of life.

3:04And, you know, what it should be is the kids fighting over who gets to do it. But that's not the way it is. We are all I nature selfish creatures. But I think it's a conversation you need to have with your boyfriend. This is, you know, is this a temporary situation that your love can't be put on pause for a year? Well, you know, maybe your dad will tell you, I'm going to go through six months of treatment. This, I don't know what the treatment plan is. It doesn't, is it a permanent thing where we're just waiting for dad to pass? I don't, I don't know. But these are conversations. If you want to be an adult and have independence, then you've got to have some adult conversations with the people that, that matter the most to you. I'd start with, uh, see if it's an option for your boyfriend to move to where you are for a while. Talk to your parents about what they want and then make decisions from there. There you go. Love letters. Love letters to Kelly. Dear Kelly, you are the love expert. I am. I'm 36 with a six-year-old daughter. My husband cheated on me about four years ago and we worked through it. Or so I thought.

4:05Here I am four years later and my marriage is over. He left our 12-year relationship married for eight because he has someone else again. He was not a good husband, but he's a good dad and he was my best friend for 12 years. I guess my question is, why do men cheat? How do I pick myself up from the sadness? How do you go from being together for 12 years to being alone? You just got to go through it. I don't know why. There's so many different reasons. It's not just one reason. I think the male ego is a very big factor in all of this because when you get into the mundane routine of marriage and life and parenthood, maybe they're not getting all the attention they want Scott. Maybe they're not being told every day how handsome and sexy they are. But that girl at the office is telling them those things. That's one reason maybe. But I don't know what this reason is. This guy cheated. Everybody's got reasons. But all you have to do is you have to go through the pain. The hardest part is keeping your mouth shut, talking bad about him in front of the child.

5:08You have to really bite your tongue on that. Like you said, he has a good father, just not a great husband. I did tell my daughter because we got divorced when she was very young. I said, if you ever have any questions, come to me and I'll be as honest as I can be. But I never tried to paint her dad in a bad light. Just be careful of that. Allow yourself a period of mourning. But eventually you'll start feeling yourself again when somebody else looks at you and you're like, oh, maybe I can't start moving on and feeling something for another man. And hopefully you'll turn that corner sooner rather than later. But there's no matter how formal you got to go through the pain. It's not necessarily grieving the man. It's grieving the death of your dream. That's what it is. The dream you had, you were going to raise your child together, be grandparents together. And the dream is gone. That's what you're more mournful of, I believe. That's what you hit it 100% on the head. When I came home and saw that empty closet and I was like, okay, that was...

6:11It wasn't a blunt, you know, you see problems, tea packs. But it's like, man, that's not what I wanted. It sucks. It does suck. Sharing custody sucks. Splitting holidays and vacations suck. And it sucks when it was at the action of someone else. It wasn't even you. You couldn't even control it. Nothing you did wrong there. If you want to write our love expert, you could do so. LovelettersToKelli.com is where you can do that. And now we're going to open up the phone lines. Because we celebrate being different on this show. We call it, does that make me crazy? So you tell us about the quirks you do that follow it up by asking us, does that make me crazy? And then we'll let you know. Most likely you will get into our club. So let's get right to it. What's up, John? So I don't like going in speed 11. I hate it. So I wait for a car to come in front of me. Because then I'm protected from the radar by them. And when they go by me, I pick up speed a little bit. So they feel like they got to stay in front of me. So they pick up speed a little bit more.

7:11So we're both going a little bit faster. And I don't get to take it. You're using a shield. Yeah, I like it. I like it. They're my shield. Well played. I think that's smart. I don't know if that's crazy. I think we all use the shield. I make sure we're protected. Oh, my mom taught me that when I first got my permit. Like, oh, if they're going fast in front of you, just go as fast as they do. I will say this though, one time, John, I did get pulled over by a police officer. And I was behind the car that was going fast. Who was my shield? And I asked him, I was like, how come you're going to pull over the guy that was in front of you? And he said, because you were pushing him to go fast. Oh. Oh. I've just seen a highway patrol to people over before. Yeah. How they do that? If I got your license plate, they can just say, hey, boy, you get over there. I'm going to get this guy. Drive by you and they point you up. Yeah. Highway patrol. They got skills. What's up, Rubin? Hey, what's going on? All right, man, go ahead and share. Let's see if you're joining our club. So I've noticed like every gas station I go to, each gas station has a different smell.

8:14And with each different gas station, like, I would say, like, I want to go like to 7-11. That's like my favorite gas station smell. But I notice each other gas stations just smell different. And I'm like, yeah, I don't like that smell, but I like this smell. And I want to come to this gas station. Does that make me crazy? Yes, but I love it. Yeah. Love it. Do they smell like gas? No. Well, I think it's the different type of cleaners. Oh, that makes sense. I bet I like it. There's something about that 7-11 smell that just like, this is home. What's the worst smelling gas station? Uh, my local gas station is called offsets. And then it just smells like fried burritos, everything. Love it. That smells delicious. What are you talking about? Oh, wait a minute. They're our sponsor right now. It's just like, man, I mean, then you smell like it for the rest of the day. No matter if you take a shower, it's a terrible smell. Get a fried burrito for me. Oh, my God. So we got his favorite smelling is 7-11. Yeah. It also says not his favorite. Oh, man. We've all gone on a road trip and smelled a really bad gas station.

9:15You walk in and you're like, yeah, I'm not. I'm not going to buy that. But have y'all had an awesome burrito? No, but I want one now. When you see one, get one. Hey, Rebecca. Hey. Go ahead and hit us with your, does that make me crazy? So when I go to sleep, I cannot have my pinky toes touched. Because if I do, I like, I feel like, I don't know, my skin. Like I'm an explode or something. I don't know. How about your big toes? Can your big toes touch? My big toes are fine. It's just my pinky toes. Do you have your legs crossed? Touch each other or touch the other toes? My legs crossed. Because you mean your pinky toes touch each pinky toe? Like the other pinky toe? Yeah. Yeah, like next to each other. Like, you know, just like next to the big toe that's next to it. Oh, okay, okay. Oh, I was like, what? No, you're confusing me. I was like, I'm okay. No, we're always okay, no. Oh, we're the crazy ones. You're the crazy ones. The Rebecca's con for a certain kind of crazy.

10:15All these things. Okay? Tiny, I'll need a little. All those little deals that give you the�erpez are the商. All the spr enters. Yeah, the mannequin where you spread your toes. Oh, because it does not give me the right amount of pressure I need. So, I have to give three tablespoons, okay. Three tablespoons. And I have to cut them in half, exactly in half. And I have to roll them up in half and I have to roll them up into really tight balls and stick them in between my toes. My pinky toe and the other toe. You get those from the pedicure place where they separate your toes for polish and just sleep with them. It doesn't give the same amount of pressure. It doesn't. I can't do it. So her pinky toe can't touch her ring toe was basically can't touch can't be touching anything. You get one of those things. You get one of those things. We stop it. Rebecca, welcome to the club. That is, and that's kind of cute. That's a new one. Every now you got to pray for it. That's wonderful day. It's not just a radio. It's a familiar part of your day. Every morning. The Kidcotted Morning Show. Two good and co-coffee creamers are made with farm fresh cream, real milk, and contain

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