Is Your Child Just Too Worrisome?

Too much worry can consume our kids, rob them of fun and friendship. What to do to help them not worry so much. Just saying "don't worry so much" is unhelpful. How about another strategy? When you notice your child worrying, use your active listening skills to help them calm down and be in the moment. Help him reframe his worry as a "what if" question. Then help him change the "what if" question into an "I wonder" statement, and add a positive outcome to his curiosity. Rather than being locked up in worry, you can help him establish a goal toward which he can take steps to accomplish. For example, "What if I fail my spelling test tomorrow?" becomes, "I wonder how well I will do on my spelling test tomorrow?" The what if locks him up in unproductive worry, while the I wonder motivates him to study harder to do better on the spelling test.  Help him practice switching from what if to I wonder with several situations until the change comes second nature to him.