Getting What You Want from Parenting

As parents, we all are faced with a parenting choice. Do we want power over our children? Or do we want relationship with out children? Don't confuse power with authority. As mom and dad, you always have authority. The question is about how you use it. You can use power, by yelling, spanking, and exercising other forms of discipline. Power gets you compliance, but at the expense of relationship. Do you really want your child to fear you? When you choose relationship, you use active listening to understand what your child was thinking and feeling at the time of the problem. You help him understand the impact of his actions on himself and others. You may decide on a natural consequence to his inappropriate words or actions. In doing these things, you likely keep the relationship intact. When you want relationship, you get love and understanding.