Fist Full of Cock | 140

Grab an old-fashioned and pull up a chair, because we’re back in the bunker where the filters are nonexistent, and the world’s IQ is dropping faster than John's accents. John Jamingo, Deuce, Joe, and special guest Diane the Queen of Dilly Dally are here for their monthly dose of "day drinking and shit tawkin,"

The Boy Band Betrayal

And let’s settle this Beatles nonsense once and for all. Deuce says they were musical revolutionaries, but they are not the original boy band. John and Joe say, they had bowl cuts, the matching suits, and a fan base of yappy broads screaming so loud you couldn't hear a single chord. If you're marketed to teenagers for your "heartthrob" status, you're InSync with a British accent—case closed.

Home Defense and Stalker Logic

When the world gets weird, like a VR nutjob claiming he knows where Jamingo lives, you don’t reach for the rock salt. That’s just asking for a lawsuit. In his house, he goes center mass with double-ought buckshot. Anything on the inside of my house is a threat, and I’m not shooting for the leg just so a guy can sue me from a hospital bed later. Bottom line. Live your life and stay away from Jamingo.

The August Deadline

Mark your calendars for May 29th. By then, we’ll see if Joe’s new flame has officially moved in or if he’s still "guarding his solitude" like a monk. We’re also trying to drag one of the original founders of Brand X, and John Jamingo, down to the studio with a bottle of scotch, as long as it’s under two hundred dollars.

Until next time, eat my fart box. Adios, b!tches.

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SSOTW Promo