
About this episode
Is it possible to hold space for both joy and grief simultaneously?
This week we’re speaking with Ivana Burbage. Ivana is a mom, wife and photographer from San Diego but now lives in Hawaii with her husband Justin. She loves being creative, surfing,
spending time in the ocean and since having her babies is passionate about birth and motherhood.
And as Ivana’s story unfolds, you will certainly notice the mingling of both joy and pain throughout and between her two pregnancy and birthing experiences. And isn’t this such a picture of the reality of our lives? We don’t always have perfectly separated, segmented experiences of extreme elation or depthy grief– often times our lives unfold in a way where both must share space and coexist. I am so grateful to Ivana and her family for sharing this reality, both the pain and the beauty.
Episode Roundup:
- Ivana’s first pregnancy began by greeting new life while also saying goodbye to one of the most important figures of her life. This tension is overwhelming, and the grief of this was so heavy. What I am so happy to hear is the way that Ivana’s community surrounded her. Her husband, Justin, who is familiar with loss himself along with Ivana’s midwife, who stepped in as a support figure both made sure that she was processing her grief in a meaningful way, not allowing the pain to take her as a fearful captive. It is so clear that this made a massive impact in how Ivana was able to experience the rest of her pregnancy, along with her beautiful first birth. When grief struck her family again during her sister’s birth, the same support system came alongside to offer the care that was so desperately needed. What a picture of what it means to live in community and to receive the comfort and love that is so desperately needed in times of such deep pain.
- Next, keep in mind that each birthing experience is its own– it’s easy to assume that our births will follow a specific pattern or that they will look and feel similarly to a previous experience, but as Ivana mentioned in this episode. Her first birth and her second birth began quite differently, which did add to the experience of labor denial! Ivana thought that her second birth would involve losing her mucous plug over the course of several days and having her water break just like it did with her first, but this second birth followed its own pattern and blueprint! The beauty is that Ivana was able to very comfortably flow with the birth that presented itself, which allowed her to absorb every little moment of her rather short labor.
- Finally, I want to end with a name. Te’a. God’s promise. We aren’t promised that everything in life will go exactly how we want it to, and this is so clear throughout the stories that Ivana shared today, but there’s one thing that Ivana stands firm on– we are promised that God will be there. That He will show up with and for us, and we will not walk any of it alone. Sweet baby Te’a, a rainbow baby after a tumultuous storm. What a gift.
Links:
FREE Peaceful Birth Reset: https://www.myhappyhomebirth.com/birthreset
Whole Mother Homebirth | https://www.myhappyhomebirth.com/wholemotherhomebirth (use code PODCAST for 10% off)
Learn more about Samaritan Ministries: https://samaritanministries.org/happyhomebirth
Youtube | https://youtu.be/4TR1W5_VM2o
Restorative Roots | restorativeroots.com (use code HAPPYHOMEBIRTH for $20 off your first order)
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