Change Before Life Changes You | Peter Boolkah on Business, AI and Personal Growth

0:00It's almost like humanity repeats cycles I think and I wonder if humans are prone to the same things on a shorter scale. It's a problem when you're working in a corporate. It comes at a point where it becomes kind of tight at the top and basically there's not room for everyone. It was quite clear there wasn't anyone for me. Where you put your attention as a direction you go is probably one of the biggest things to teach people but what do you think are the major factors that are keeping people trapped? I think you've got to be very careful what you read and one of my big pettates was the fact that when coaches first became coaches they sort of learned to have a sudden market they were ringing they were sort of reading bloody. Seven have as a highly effective people. Realized he was pushing against forces he didn't want to push against so it was no sunshine and rainbows they shut our minds they shut our docks and they tried to break the backbone of the working class but we came through it.

1:06Hey guys welcome to peaking side it's me again Archi Jones legend in his own lunch box and today we've got a pizza with us. Now be there first of all thanks for being here mate. No I listen thank you for having me today I'm looking forward to the convo. Thanks Valar I know what I will say is that I always kind of give a little bit of an introduction and this is what it is that every single day that was brought us up to now existed and it is no longer it is a memory and every step we take every direction we look in everything we give attention to leads up to the present moment and so the question to you Peter is what has brought you here and where what's been your journey you're the highlights of your journey. Bloody hell I mean this would probably be a Joe Rogan podcast of utterance that one so I could probably laugh. But look a very long look has been a long journey I kind of followed what typically a lot people do at the school college university while I was at uni and college I was working

2:08full time as well so I did study full time work full time basically with Donalds that also made a really good grounding and perhaps our good organisation does run by then sort of you see in film avic. Yeah yeah yeah yeah well you know how maverick is great at pissing off the ad more rather the same thing so I ended up leaving with Donalds for a restaurant found out that wasn't quite as glamorous as it did look like on Gordon Ramsay's house kitchen, it's plugged the restaurant became a coach and 21 years later I'm still doing what I'm doing. Nice so in those early days what was the what what mess you know when the transition from the employment to the coach what what how did that come about like was the did you did you have any key event so did you meet something? Yeah yeah did you read a book or no no no literally the key event was the fact that I pissed off the ad more and there was no room for both of us there.

3:09Yeah that's a problem when you're working in a corporate there comes a point where it becomes kind of tight at the top and basically there's not room for everyone and it was quite clear there wasn't any room for me. Yeah well I was going to stay it was going to be bloody hell so it was kind of forced upon me to be fair however when it was upon me I didn't know what I was going to do. The the idea is that so you're in you're in this crossroads and I always love a crossroad because we come across them all the time in life and so you get this crossroads and I think that coaching is quite a unique skill set and like to me that transition it's not obvious so what was happening what went that you realized that this was going to be an opportunity for you like what what happened in your life that made you think of coaching because for example like Tony Robbins just this like wonderful story and I still never know why

4:11he bloody went into it over the needs got a loud voice and he's tall you know what I mean I just if you have do you have like a was there like a passion or you had a time for it or you know what I'd be lying if I said I did it wasn't even it wasn't even there I told the restaurant now I was actually looking at the next corporate geek to be honest and so I was in between and a franchise called action coach they approach me and they better you interested look and I didn't have anything else to do at the time I was in between so I thought I could you know what let me be curious and see and I wasn't really going to do it I wasn't but then sometimes you like you talk about moments the final due diligence me and I had was with the guy called Ray Moore in charge with actually and he had started a firm coach you firm about you and I for earlier you know sometimes people come into your life and they're the right person for you the right time well he was that he happened to be what I needed he happened to be

5:14what I needed so I quite was inspired by what he was hoping to achieve so now I joined I joined the became a coach became part became partners with him and we had 15 good years together and it wasn't a passion to be honest with you at the beginning it was just for placing income it was look you got bills to pay you got you got family will bills to pay you literally in that you in the ship you got to do something and that's what I did it became a passion after a number of years nothing the biggest life changing event for me was when I committed to this and I made a decision I was never going back to corporate I think that what I what I like though is that there is normally the universe normally offers an an options as we progress you know where you where you make you need to make a choice and I think that's what I was hoping that you would say that a guy or a book or a what you came into your life and then you chose to to pursue it for whatever reason

6:14you might not have been fully aware of the intention at the time or what you were hoping for but you jumped on board took a risk rather than staying in the safe lane and can I just ask because you went into partnership were you immediately salaried or were you relying on like you know you were having to regenerate your own revenue right to generate my revenue listen we had a share we had a shared resource we put money in and we share the resource and I think my know I literally had to build the business up from scratch and then once you'd once you'd started established and you said you developed a passion for it over time I've often found Charles Darwin quite fascinating because everyone remembers what Darwin did you know the end stage but before even began to theorize his his original kind of evolutionary theory he stirred it barnacles for seven years every single day he missed bloody Christmas he missed birthdays and stirred it barnacles and he had a breakthrough and I think that that's one thing

7:15that you've said and I think one thing that might be missing a bit in the modern world is that we these sometimes like your breakthrough was actually based on discipline repetition and showing up and and then you became good at it yeah do you know what I think my and I think for me it was that period of time where I decided I was going to commit I think that was a big bit is when I decided if it was time to commit once I did that yeah the rest was history to really what happened especially that when you know sometimes you mourn the life you had I think I spent too much time mourning the life I had and I was living in the past and I was in present and it was around year three when I had to make the decision what the hell am I going to do because actually remaining stuck was really not an option anymore where I decided I don't want to be stuck then he changed and so once you'd

8:19once you'd started that kind of I I use though I overuse this word metamorphosis but once you'd started that change you um it was there's some like did you like keep it quite basic at first like looked at what you called control and like look at revenue streams like how many people we need to get through to to to pay bills to keep the lights on to pay rent you know was it was it quite practical application and it like and kept it simple and then and then built out or what were you a dreamer I mean I think it's a mixture of the two to be fair I mean there was not a bit of dreaming but I knew I had no I had no choice and I had to build it I knew I had to build it so I just sort of put my sort of big work pants on and started to learn how to build it and nothing that's the word I learned how to build it so I didn't have a clue I had no idea how this was going to work out I just knew that it was the same that I had to learn and you say sometimes

9:21there was a book that comes into your life I think over that sort of first 15 years so it was probably about 500 books that came into my life and now that was the way I had to be I had to learn I had to learn a whole new skill set I mean I know I like the way you refer to coaching and coaching is a skill set that needs to be learned which is not that's not something that's not necessarily intuitive which book out of the 500 sorry Peter just before I forget which book out the 500 would you say to start with I'm not saying they're not all valuable but which one would you start with you know what a nest of really I mean not people ask me that question and I think it differs for everybody and the reason being do a book at the wrong time is like putting a gun in the front of an idiot it's not going to

10:25have the desired effect so I think you've got to be very careful what you read and like one of my big pet hates was the fact that when coaches first became coaches instead of learning how to sell a market they were ringing they were sort of reading bloody seven habits of highly effective people I mean how stupid can you read that's the that's not that's one of the last books you read now as you're going to have no business so I think you just got to be very cognizant of grab book at the right time but get advice about that obviously I mean if you're in business obviously you're a business sucks playing about places start but it depends on what you and all your brands and what you're trying to achieve that's what I would say yeah makes sense mate I just I guess that if there was one that a jump dara would have been it would have been fascinating but it makes it makes perfect sense I mean well I mean okay so one that I really love really don't like her actually but was very useful at beginning was one that burns the secret I thought I was highly useful only from the point of view being that actually when you look

11:32at a lot of attractions are really powerful tall if you actually know how to use it I I found that book interesting as well and it from a very similar methodology to you I think the criticisms I have with that though is that it has been misconstrued on the internet as like if you just like read it and then sit back and think it will come to you but but it is you have to work incredibly hard over many many years and put yourself into a situation where things can happen but then when you do generally it does begin to snow more but it isn't about sitting back and receiving grace yeah but I and I think you fit the nail on the head you see I mean you can't arm your way to success there does have to be an element of do so you listen you can visualize all you want you can do your affirmations you can do less stuff but there is the doing that needs to

12:34happen you don't do the doing you're screwed and in from from there then Peter so you you started to build this business you were in partnership for 15 years during that 15 years was there any events that caused you to question your direction and I mean of course we always like yeah yeah multiple multiple I mean you're the GFC of 2008 2009 that was horrific that was an absolute catastrophic period COVID weren't great I mean there's a number of times over the years where I've more or less lost my business where it's like 70% of our revenue just disappeared and I think you just got to be very clear what is it you what should journey look like and actually what was the purpose of what you do and then get out there and continue I don't know it's easier said than done very often it's easier said than done but I believe we've got

13:34a choice and in the GFC particularly Peter because I remember that one that was where I mentioned you offline where my house went down in value but it wasn't an expensive house in the first place it lost 20% of its value after nine years of ownership and I'd always been told that um you buy a house it always goes up you know so so that that myth was busted in in 2008 but what what was the for you was it the fact that a lot of people were struggling and so your service or was it were you servicing corporations or like could I guess you know what it was liquidity just disappeared out the market banks were lending banks were foreclosing and because I'm in Lehman's brothers thank you very much because they weren't passed they literally people that did nothing wrong in business lost their business because the people they were supplying they went passed so now my clients went past not not because I did anything wrong is because the people they

14:37were servicing when I have business and it was just a very very very vicious cycle. Did you manage to avoid finger pointing you know drawing the down times because I think that's one thing with partnerships that can be do do up a little bit within it that is complex and the person I've found when I've been in partnerships before that when times are good it's good but when times are hard sometimes they can be a bit of finger pointing did you come across that? Yeah we were fortunate enough that we recognize what was going on and we literally started thinking okay what's the solution so we looked for a solution more than anything else and thankfully look we worked it out and got through it and then once you'd once Peter once you'd kind of got through the hard times and then it got to the 15 year mark and then you decided to go your own way what was that what was that looking like? I mean we we came to a point where I'm

15:39fortunate that COVID was what COVID was and we kind of decided okay you know it was probably a good time to separate so and I'd probably had grown my partner a long time ago so it was just a natural case it is time for me to do my own thing and that was it we changed I mean look there a business model changed a lot my business model changed a lot because we went remote we got rid of the office I mean I've never ever had a physical office since only because the world around us is changing yeah and I don't see that ever changing back to what it was truth we told change I think that they say they say that the only the people say death in taxes are a never told but I think the only thing that is truly inevitable is change and if you look at the dawn of time the sun burns and and and the cast lights and the trees the seasons you know we're

16:41geared up we're born and we die and and change happens in between so on that what what with change Peter it sounds like some of you've embraced I mean how what would you say about what would you say about change like how do you prepare for it and and and how do you kind of manage it because it sometimes can be daunting it can be scary but in fact I believe it is it is essential for growth you got no choice and okay how would I put it I think knowledge prepares you for change so it gives you a framework in which a decision making tree as things happen you're able to pivot you can't do what you don't know so when situations come that you can't handle and you're not prepared for you're just going to be a victim that's why I say right now so reading books and everything is absolutely critical the more you learn the more you've got a frame of reference where you can make good decisions in bad circumstances with AI do you like because you've mentioned books

17:49are you worried at all with AI that people are outsourcing thinking they're outsourcing reason and outsourcing decision decision making because I I am very fond of of Nietzsche I'm fond of Soltje Nietzsche and and these these people have I've walked with me in different seasons of my life but but I feel that that reading and digest and synthesizing and then putting it into action is different to asking AI a question and it telling you what to do and I do worry that maybe maybe the current change that we're going through is one of of outsourcing rather than internalizing the literature and then putting it into practice ourselves so I would probably look at it slightly different we'll come up with this is not going away so we are always going to be now moving forward AI has been led out of the box

18:49I think at any given point in time people are predisposed to be lazy I think the lazy will be the lazy and they'll get the results for being lazy and I think those that actually are smart and use it in a responsible way will benefit from it a lot of people just use check look look people stop reading books I think they can get the answer what they do is they get the answer to the question they don't get the the understanding of the situation so I think what will happen is the stupid will become more stupid but I don't mean and I really don't mean that horribly but everyone says that oh there's a divide divide the world's not fair the world's never designed to be fair and it never will be the question is that you've got to ask yourself the question how are you going to apply in this world yeah it makes perfect sense I think that also the the idea that nature

19:50human beings are part of nature where creatures there is there is evolution retreats and and part of those traits are that some people have greater intelligence some people have greater responsibility it's like if you ask me to play you know football against Lionel Messi I'm going to lose every time if you ask me to have a chess match with Magnus Carlson Carlson I'm going to get my absolute butt kicked you know it's just it is just the way it is now both of them have practiced and both of them have got I've probably got gifts that that was given to them by the universe and I think that what you're saying is that that you you can only give so much but what I was what I guess I was picking undertones up though is that maybe because this is still in its infancy peter that you were hinting that there is that there's opportunity in this for people that are willing to apply the gray matter it's not necessarily a passenger yeah definitely and everyone is fear for that AI will place all the jobs I don't think it will I think if anything it gives us

20:54more time to intellect with humans if we choose to do that but that's got to be a choice isn't it what I was seeing on the what I what I found as well as I used to run a number of AI channels on YouTube and for the first few years it was absolutely golden and then as it became saturated the market the the actual exception became humans talking to humans genuine interaction of two people who are independent souls sharing their mind because that as it stands cannot be replicated and I think that the more that I have gone down this track the more I've realized that it is not just the beauty the aesthetic beauty of something called the the present it is the fact that someone else has worked on it and I don't know if you remember when you were a kid Peter but like we

21:56easy come easy go so like say for example your your mates your mate or your your cousin got a car given from his dad and then two weeks later it was put into a wall you know what I mean I've not deliberately just showing off or whatever whereas if your first car was a $200 a red Justin Metro 200 pounds sorry and a reds Austin Metro that you had to push to start then then but you you worked every penny for it in a carrot factory for one pound 80 an hour you kind of looked after the $200 Austin Metro and I think that maybe that is maybe that lesson is timeless that if you work for it and and it is something that serves a function then you will nurture it more than if it comes easy the 100% 100% and I think that we're I want them to just get you to give a bit more on is the you mentioned earlier about if you read it okay and and or you get told it by AI and then the how that data is

23:03then computed into your brain and how it's stored now what I would say though is Peter I would take that one step further and when you actually write and I know you're a writer do you not find that that is almost as pure as you can get even though and I would suspect I'm not saying this is your case but in my case I sometimes don't even know where the words come from they just come to me through the ether but once they have once I have manifested them into reality through my action and my attention that I remember most of my books for the rest of my life because it is it is a lived thing is is that something that you can speak to a bit Peter little 100% it is it is a lived thing it is a lived thing and again you don't read for a read in psych do you you read for actually what the lesson is and it's a lesson that's the most important thing

24:06it's about the lesson and actually how you apply it to your life but the thing is most people have done have their own dreams they live other people's dreams and that's a scary thing so they they don't know what they want they chase what other people have yeah I agree it's terrifying actually and I often talk of agency and ownership and being a passenger in your own life and one thing that I've found is that the self is something that you like my mom my dad my brother my cousins they might have different versions of me but I'm the one constant and and I think that if you allow yourself to be dictated to from external forces so the feed through social media through news through movies through then and you externalize agency then you actually never truly live and I just wonder do you do anything work like that with your

25:11with your clients about like ownership and control and helping them to to to stay present with with them as opposed to externalizing things outside of that control they get us just another learnt skill seven coffee talks about it in seven amber society effective people circle of influence circle of concern it's trying to get people to focus on the circle of influence the stuff that they can work on the stuff that they can look as easy as it been done easier said than done but you got you got to learn how to focus on the things you can control and try to shut out what you can't though it's a little bit difficult when you listen to the news and everything and what direction are you are you heading in now Peter I'm moving from coaching where I'm still coaching but I'm moving more into what's public speaking and how you find in it

26:15like the transition again is it is it summit that you is it a natural progression it is for me and I tell you why it's because look 21 years of coaching is a long time it's a long time and it's that next challenge I mean I've been my first book the second book snail with the editors I'm about to start writing the third so I'm going to do that whole route now taking 20 years of research and then making it into or transferring it into books that will be relevant for the next 10 years I use that very carefully because you take someone like Michael Lee Gover in the book the emis revisited the fantastic book really is by snail a bit dated the first book the the emis revisited by Michael Lee Gover that was a really great book at the time but I think I'm going to be coming up that 30 years old I mean that's now dated because it's no longer relevant to today's world yeah I think one thing that one thing with books that has been

27:21amazing as well as the years have rolled by like I think it was we by Yuri I can't remember her name and then you had orders hoaxly and then you had George Orwell and when these were wrote they were science fiction and then now in the modern world it is it's it's almost parody isn't it and I think that in a lot of the greatest self-help books but I think also in a lot of the greatest literature that it is it is it's almost it's almost like humanity repeat cycles I think and I wonder if humans are prone to the same things on a shorter scale and I think that taking those lessons being present and I guess I guess the act of doing the act of of where you put your attention is the direction you go is is probably one of the biggest things to teach people but what do you think are the major factors that are keeping people trapped in the

28:22modern world you know it you know it's themselves yeah themselves and I can't and I can't stay that highly enough it is them there there and people do not like change it is really frightening how people do not like change I see so many people did you ever see the film the first film Jack Weecher yeah yeah when he would chop off his finger he would rather have a bullet to the head in chop off his finger that's what I see with people they would rather chop off their their rather have a bullet to the head then sacrifice something to get to the next point and I see that all the time and change look changes are easy there's so many factors that come into it unfortunately changing it is inevitable so what happens either you change or the universe will change you anyone be the change you want

29:28yeah I think that and then and then on that how how would you if you were telling someone like and I understand you know the old joke about the psychiatrist how many psychiatrist it changed a change of light bulb and it's like no and you've got to want to change but like if someone I guess if someone's coming to you and kind of seeking the first steps I guess they've already they've already initiated they've already initiated change and so I think that in that that it is true that by the time someone comes looking they're already winning aren't they you know the people that take the first steps are already winning I mean by the year 100% and by the time they come to you they've made the conscious choice they want to change that's a big difference when people come they they're not happy with where they are they know they don't know what they don't know but they know what they what they've got will not get them to where they want to be so they're ready

30:36and that's a big difference I think Peter that for me with the with the change that I do often think that like I think how I see it is that life as I mentioned at the very beginning when I introduced you that life is just a series of moments and the way we exist now is a consequence of of the the moments up until this moment and what we did and I'll give you an example of very small example like when I was younger I might leave bills unopened now I feel the bill comes I just opened the bills I I would sometimes walk past a sink that was filled with dishes thinking my wife or someone else would do it now if I say I just clean it do you know because it is it is something that I can I can actionally do and actually a lot of it come down to taking responsibility ownership but also about what how I affect others you know and I do I do wonder I do wonder as well if that you found that as social media has growing that it has it's caused people to maybe become

31:38even more or is it a fact that we just see the highest in the distribution so there's that more sense of narcissism is like a given perfect platform for the narcissist because we used to I would say when I grew up in I grew up in the 80s yet and there was it wasn't perfect but there was a feeling of a little bit of a feeling particularly locally what can I do for you and somewhere along the way that message got changed or what can I get from you and and I wonder if maybe that could be pulled back a bit to somewhere in between yeah looking I think that don't get me wrong I do believe that your 80s in the UK especially were a tough time I mean you know I discussed 70s were shit all and the UK was very much recovering what you're going to find though is with social media any idiot could start to report to be something and people would believe it and I give you a good good example and I'm not sure whether you've seen it in the news around the tape blathers yeah yeah in America or something with those weird stuff yeah yeah but

32:43always stuff that they reported that they headed everything they didn't but people believe that you see and people will go for the part of least resistance and unfortunately with AI and everything not AI with actually with social media everyone thinks they can be an influencer so all of a sudden is doing a competition it's like okay beat the jones is and that's half the problem now is that people have got no realism on really what it takes to achieve this is why you've got a terrible loss generation where they've been totally sort of fascinated by AI their parents have been sort of ferrying them around wiping their backside long after they should have been and they've got no construct and had to handle today's world because now they build I've got I mean had you have 30 year olds done university that are now on benefits because they don't know what they want to do are you seriously kidding me the benefit

33:46system was never created for you indecisional stupidity go do something I think that's I think and again hope maybe hope taken away societal contract was taken away expectation has changed and they've normalized we grew up in the 70s in interest rates were 20% my parents could in a 40 hit the house I mean what how did we have it do you think can I just say though do you think that this is one thing I've definitely seen so Indian children from India children from China I know more I know more people from Kerala are actually than I do China but but they are hungry they are keen to get educated they have solid family structure they have expectations to care for their old they have duties to the young their community is and I'm not saying it's perfect

34:53it's not but it feels like a lot of the things that are born in struggle were lost so and in that loss the the the structure of the West has actually lost its backbone and maybe that in itself is caused are people to be like just I can't fully explain it but I know it's not a global phenomenon because I know other countries are still hungry yep and guess what lost its backbone is absolutely fantastic example but what you're probably looking at the countries that you are now talking to where they're hungry they've got those countries are got very clear identity they've got multiple religions people were their own cultures but the country itself is called one culture so therefore there is clarity you look at the West the West is trying to become everything to everybody and in that instance it's become confused dysfunctional and we're seeing that we'll

35:54see the effects of that and Peter just for you just if you wouldn't mind just let us know where we can find you and just just about that upcoming book as well if there's anything you can say about it because I'm super excited to hear that man yeah look the book is just but it's 10 10 weeks out now can we found on Amazon Amazon.au just typing your business up so it'll come up with even 99 cents at the moment for on the Kindle Edition so it's super accessible you want to find me just find my name in the group it's really simple and then you can choose how you connect with this LinkedIn my podcast channel you tube channel instagram tick-tock facebook you choose thanks Peter so I'll just give a quick final summary mate and then we'll wrap up so what I've took from today guys is that Peter started off humble beginnings worked at MacDonald's lived through when the united kingdom was supposed to be the golden age but it wasn't it was no sunshine and rainbows they shut our minds they shut our our docs and they tried to break the backbone of the

36:59working class but we came through it there was a shared identity we were people as we mentioned when into MacDonald didn't quite like that tried the corporate life realized he was pushing against forces he didn't want to push against so joined through self-directed and opportunity but not no hero complex here he joined a organization with one friend that he made himself he built that up for 15 years successfully and then is transitioned is transitioning into something better and what that shows you guys is that if you apply yourself over time you don't have to be in love you don't have to have this fantasy about this wonderful thing you just have to do with intention and in doing so as as Peter did he learnt to master it and in mastery there is a beauty so Peter I just want to say your time your attention is being I've absolutely privileged mate and I hopefully I'll see you again my friend now thank you so much for having me it's been a great conversation

37:59thanks Peter thank you