Boyfriend Called Me A 'Corrupted Person' When I Refused To Help Him | Reading Reddit

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2:02And if you do love a reddit story, why not consider in the like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. Let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from Mono Mani who says, My boyfriend 27 male. Asked the borrow quite a huge sum of money from me. 24 female. Had a deal with this situation. We've only been dating for the last four months. Nothing too serious yet. He's going through a bit of a rough patch as he's lost his job earlier this month but he already has a new job. He just has a few loan payments to pay every month and since he's not receiving his salary this month, he's finding it difficult to arrange the money. I myself have been in a difficult financial situation for the last few years and he's aware of it. I live paycheck to paycheck. I never have money to save. Oh, I always make sure to pay my part during dates and have never asked the borrow money from him. The idea of wanting the borrow money from him

3:02wouldn't even come into my head. And now I'm afraid of continuing this relationship. This conversation was already so awkward. I wasn't able to refuse him. I said that I'll think about it. What if he asked the borrow money again in the future? I really can't afford to be in a relationship with someone like this. Not at the moment. I'm afraid I'm being too selfish. He's a nice guy nevertheless. Firstly, four months in a relationship and someone asking me to borrow a huge sum of money. I'm not sure how much that is at the moment but I'm expecting a lot. But four months in and someone asking me that would make me side-eye them instantly. You know, if it was a small amount or whatever, I could maybe get it. But if I was asking for a huge amount, it would definitely feel off, especially if he knows your financial situation of living paycheck to paycheck at the same time. But it did make me wonder why you couldn't say no at the same time that you were so uncomfortable you couldn't refuse in that moment when the answer has to be no in this situation.

4:04But a commenter did ask, how much is quite a huge sum in this instance? Like a rough ballpark. He has what seems to be a consistently bad track record with money management, which makes this a bad idea. If he asks to borrow again, refuse again with the above reason. I already live months to month and I can't save money, therefore I can't give you a loan. I'd be questioning the compatibility here. If he's asking for loans from you to cover loans, he's already had to take out. That's like trying to stop a leak by throwing more water in. Opie says, well, according to the standards of where I live, it's more than half the amount of what I earn every month. Comments are apply saying, absolutely not. I kind of get why you told him you'd think about it, because it was dumped on you with no warning. But enough time is a lapse that you should have no doubt. When you said the following however, it's kind of alarming. I really kind of fall to be in a relationship with someone like this, not at the moment. This implies if you had the money,

5:05you'd give it to him. That is scary. After only a few months, nobody should be asking the borough a large sum of money, and I'd call this a deal breaker. I have no idea why you'd worry you're being selfish when you said yourself you'd never do something like this. Opie says, yeah, you're right. I just wanted to be a good friend and not just a girlfriend. It was just very unexpected. Comments says, after four months, that takes a lot of nerve. Girl, just tell him you don't have it. Does he not have other long-term friends or relatives he can borrow from? Or did he already burn those bridges? Opie says he said his sister helped him all the time, so he's a bit shy to ask her, and he's asked a few friends, but none of them responded. Comments says to Opie, you live paycheck to paycheck. You can't afford to say yes to any amount of money, much less a huge sum. You tell him that you can't afford it. You don't have it, and you can't make it appear like magic. It's also concerning that you aren't able to tell him no immediately.

6:07You're afraid of him. Afraid of displeasing him. Are you a people pleaser? Or has he done things that make you afraid of him? If you're a people pleaser, maybe gets in therapy to work on this. If he's done things to make you afraid, this relationship needs to end. I understand he may feel desperate right now, but asking you, at four months in, for a substantial amount of money is a big red flag. Opie says, I don't know if I'm a people pleaser. I just want to be helpful. No, he hasn't done anything to make me afraid. He's mostly been nice to me. So Opie did add their update and said, so I know it hasn't been long and hopefully some of you will remember my previous post. I refused to give him the money, and told him that it felt a bit inconsiderate to ask for such a huge amount, and that request has made me uncomfortable. When we've only been together for four months, he said that I was an awful person to not being able to trust him. And if I had to ask him for money, he would have trusted me enough to give it to me. Now I've been blocked everywhere because my behavior seemed disrespectful to him,

7:11and I feel awful. I'm hurt, but I guess I have my answer. I find it a bit convenient that he says that he can, you know, give you his imaginary money if he would have had it, of course. Very commoner says, girl, dump this loser. Opie says, well, I think I'm the one who's been dumped. Commoner says, you never let people borrow money to be honest, especially not partner or family. Also, why is he mad? Why is he asking for money this early on? Opie says that is what I wanted him to explain. Like, why did you expect me to loan you such a huge sum when we've only casually been together for four months? And he said that amount of time would have mattered to him, but it does to me. But I couldn't trust him completely just yet, and he completely flipped out. He was mostly okay with me refusing to lend him the money. It's the reason for it that made him angry. But just worried about what if he asked me for money again? How many times do I refuse him? Wouldn't it build resentment after a while? And it seems like he does regularly borrow money from friends, but how am I supposed to be sure about his financial habits?

8:14Would he pay me back completely? Would he pay little amounts over a long period of time? I have these questions because we barely know each other, and that's what I wanted to convey to him that it was too early. But he thinks I'm corrupted person and expects the worst of people. Commenter says so that I try to put myself in that person's shoes in those cases. Let's say you needed money and asked him, and let's say he said no. Would you do that and block him? Opie says I have to tell you that I would never have asked him to let me half his paycheck. I'd never even have the guts to request that from any person let alone a guy that I've been casually dating for four months. And that's the boundary that I wanted to establish in this relationship. No lending or borrowing so early on. But yeah, hypothetically, if I had needed money and he had refused to explain to me that it was too early to be doing that, I'd have absolutely accepted it. No argument at all. And in the end, I think that's a good outcome for Opie. It's one of those ones where they say the trash took itself out, but what do you guys make of this situation?

9:18Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And let's move on to another story. Now, before we do get into our next story, there is a warning on it of sudden death of a parent and spouse. So if you do want to skip the story, please feel free to do so. Time stamps are always down in the description. And along the timeline below, thank you. It's from Express Highway 7696. And it's from the MIDR, so he has subreddit. And it says, I'm IDR, so here. But not honoring my wife's dying wish. Posting from a throwaway account. Six years ago, my wife passed away after a short illness. The day before she passed away, it seemed as though she may pull through. She said to me, if I die, you're not allowed to date. I laughed and promised I wouldn't. Both of my daughters were there when she said it. That night, things went horribly downhill, and she was gone by noon the next day. I spent the last six years raising my girls and finally sent my youngest off to college in August.

10:18I've been involved in a few support groups for people who have lost spouses for the last few years, and earlier this year, I really connected with a woman who lost her husband around the same time. I wasn't looking for a relationship, but we've been on a few dates and I've been trying to keep it concealed at least in the meantime. We ended up going to a restaurant and our server was one of my older daughters' friends from high school. She must have called or texted my daughter because last night, my daughter called to scream at me and basically told me I was cheating on her mother and had no right to dishonor a request of me. I'm pretty furious she called me like that and I had to hang up and told her I'd call her in the morning when I've had some time to reflect. Now all I can think is of how horrible I am for this. I'm 45 years old and I need companionship, but I don't want my daughters to think I'm spitting on their mother's grave. My wife's sister also texted me to tell me that my wife's request was unreasonable and unfair and that her family's not going to judge me if I move on and she would

11:20talk to my daughter about it. I don't want to ruin my relationship with my kids over this but I'm so damn torn. I'm I the asshole here, not honoring her request. Opie had an edit and said wow thank you for all the comments and I want to clear up that when she said it, I did take it as a joke and I think she was joking as well. The issue is pointed out by a few is that my kids were present and took it seriously. They were 14 and 12 at the time. She had been hospitalized with severe pneumonia and had been on oxygen for two days. All science were pointing to a full recovery and it was during this time she made the statement. None of us expected her to go downhill so quickly overnight. To me it sounds like daughters are going through something that's you know coming from a place of grief and fear that you moving on is probably you forgetting about her mum which you know I think is understandable but also not fair to you at the same time. You deserve companionship just as much as anyone and love at the same time and I really hope that your daughter talking to people talking to you having a calm conversation

12:25and you know understanding her feelings but also recognizing that you're allowed to find that companionship for yourself at the same time and it should be guilt free because less face it no one's going to replace their mother or your wife at the same time either but it was nice that the sister-in-law in this situation also had Opie's back. Someone in the comments was having a pop at the server for being malicious and Opie replied in her intent was not malicious. She's always been a good friend to my daughter and I think it was probably hey I saw your dad on a date so I'm so happy for him type of situation. I've never known her to be vindictive. One of the says is your daughter autistic genuine question as she ever been tested. Opie says she has ADHD but no formal diagnosis of autism though it is suspected and there was just many comments in support of Opie on this but you know understanding the daughter's grief at the same time as well but the update said I called my daughter this morning and asked if I can come to her campus for breakfast with her. She goes to school an hour away so it

13:29isn't a bad drive. Apparently my sister-in-law did talk to her last night and told her she was being irrational and unfair and that I deserve to be happy. My younger daughter who goes to school several hours away also told my older daughter it isn't a big deal and I'm allowed to live my life. We had breakfast and walked around her campus for a few hours. We talked about her mum and how much we all loved her and Mr. We had some laughs and cries and I told her I'll never try to replace her mother and anyone I date would have to get along with my girls. She's still upset which I acknowledge but she agrees that some reasonable to expect me to go the rest of my life alone. She apologised for her reaction and genuinely felt bad that she acted that way. I suggested we go to therapy together to work some of this out but she's really busy at school so wouldn't be able to until win to break. I feel like I left with our understanding and really hope she won't hold us against me. I was not even looking for a relationship especially at a support group. We met in March when on our first date in July and I've only been on three more since.

14:33We've not even been intimate so I'm not exactly sure where it's going. I appreciate all the responses and advice from everyone and it's just really nice to see that they were able to talk this out you know meet up face to face have a chat talk about the wife slash mother and work things out in a nice way. As people were talking about her age and she should be able to process this better but you know in the end we're human we process this shit in different ways and sometimes it is difficult and we don't process it in the best way and grief can make us say and do wild things. It's not an excuse absolutely not but it does. I'm glad that they was able to work this out as a family made me tear up in the middle there but what do you guys make of this one let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Over 90 of the top 100 US accounting firms trust bill to simplify and secure bill pay that's proven financial infrastructure built on over a trillion dollars of secure payments visit bill.com

15:38slash proven for a special offer. Okay I have to tell you I was just looking on eBay where I go for all kinds of things I love and there it was that hologram trading card one of the rarest the last one I needed for my set shiny like this designer handbag of my dreams one of a kind eBay had it and now everyone's asking oh where'd you get your windshield wipers eBay has all the parts that did my come on no more knowing just beautiful millions of fines each with a story eBay things people love now our next story come to the r slash advice so read it from odd explorer 9345 and it says boy friends mom invited me to be in family pictures but my family says it's weird I so I 20 female have been dating my boyfriend 20 male for almost a year now I won your anniversary is next month we're in a serious relationship we talked about marriage and both know that's where we're headed

16:39his family does professional photos every other year and this fall is when they're scheduled to do them again his mom actually asked me to be in the pictures which honestly made me really happy I've been included in a lot of family things already I've gone to his siblings birthday parties one of his brothers band concerts a wedding reception and I've met a bunch of extended family it feels like I'm part of their circle so I thought it was sweet that they want me in something special like family photos obviously I understand that no relationship is 100% guaranteed and there's always the chance we could break up so I don't expect to be in every single photo they take I know they do some with just their immediate family and I think that's normal and totally fine the problem is when I mentioned it to my mom she said why would they want you in those pictures my sister agreed it was strange and my best friend said she sees both sides she told me she dated a boyfriend for three years and he was never in her family's photos but she also admitted

17:42that maybe that was a bit extreme so now I'm kind of second-guessing myself I don't feel weird about being in the photos was serious and his mom invited me so I feel like it's fine but my family's reaction makes me wonder if I'm missing something is it actually unusual to be in your partner's family pictures after a year should I just enjoy being included or should I be cautious about it I know I'm going to say yes to being in them I guess I just never thought about it in the perspective that my family and best friend have I mean I can only talk from my family's perspective here because I know every family is different but I don't think that's weird in the slightest over the years in family photos there's all sorts of partners that's been included within family photos and we absolutely love it you know if there's a new partner introduced to the family they're automatically family to us it's that simple really unless they're a complete arse all obviously but I don't that's never really happened but I'm curious to know why they think

18:43it's why they why they think it's strange your family but commenter says do they truly think it's more appropriate to leave you out to make it clear you're not part of the family there's more about your family than theirs it totally excludes your boyfriend from family events I hope he says you know it's crazy that you brought that up because I literally had a conversation about this with my mum yesterday I've been telling her for a while that our family needs to update our family pictures because we all look so different now and I said we should do some this for and she literally said if we do some he can't be in them commenter says nah if you're in a serious relationship it's not weird your family is not as just open minded as his is if you like being part of his family and it sounds like you do enjoy the love and be grateful that your new family is a good one commenter says even if it is weird what's it going to hurt there'll be a story to tell when they look back oh yeah that was ex's girlfriend at the time but that is just my perspective and another commenter says I think it's the sweetest thing that your boyfriend

19:46mother invited you to be in the photos it is an honor she bestowed on you it'll be sad if not rude due to decline please accept especially because that is what you have stated you want to do so OP updated the post and says so we had the pictures today and honestly it went smoothed and I expected my boyfriend's mum basically took charge she was kind of the boss of the whole thing telling everyone where to stand and what combos to do since it was at a park she had a list that moved us around a lot I ended up being in almost all of the photos the only ones I wasn't in were the sibling shots but I was in everything else at first I thought it was a little strange but then it hit me that they really do see me as part of the family already his mum even had us do specific combos like me plus boyfriend me plus him plus brother and sister-in-law me plus him plus both his parents etc so yeah I was definitely included some people in the comments on my first post said I should step aside for some pictures I didn't end up doing that honestly with the way

20:50his mum was running things it would have been super awkward if I suddenly refused to be in certain shots it just wouldn't have fit the vibe but those who have guessed surprise engagement nope not this time although I wouldn't have minded lol but overall you guys were right his family does see me as part of their circle and after today I really do feel that too some of you mentioned my mum might be a little jealous and I can kind of see that I think my life looks different from what hers did at my age and she probably also doesn't want me to get hurt in the end I realized there isn't a universal right or wrong here every family handles this stuff differently but I'm glad I said yes and I truly appreciate all the advice and perspective you guys gave me on my original post again for me I think that's absolutely wonderful and it just reminds me of my own family because you know I'm thinking of my niece's husband now and the first couple of times we met him at a family event you know shook hands give him a hug whatever but now when I meet him I just look at him like family just like a brother to me and I think OP is absolutely spot on that

21:52everyone sees this kind of thing differently but one of the comments says I love that they included you but it wouldn't be shocking if they took some without you as well I see people on the photo shot request sub all the time asking to remove someone's former partner from family photos the fact that they know it's possible you won't be together forever and still chose to include you means they love and accept you and that they're likely hoping you'll be his forever that's worth remembering and another commenter says sounds like you handled it perfectly embracing their welcome shows you belong sometimes family worry comes from love but it's great your feeling included and confident keep trusting your gut oh another lovely story there for me anyway but what do you guys make of this situation how would you feel about it if it was you maybe you feel maybe even slightly towards how OP's families feel let us know your thoughts and let's move on to another story now our next story comes from twitch over porn and says my 29 female boyfriend 28 male of five

22:55years has become infatuated with female twitch streamers and it's making me feel like crap so I knew he was in the video games when we started dating I'm basically the opposite of him in that department I've never been interested in anything video game related that entire nerd culture is not for me mind you I've made an effort to understand his hobby and over the years I've even found games I enjoy playing I would definitely not consider gaming to be a hobby of mine I play rhythm games like once a week for an hour at most for example in the beginning of the relationship first couple of years or so it was pretty difficult getting through to him because he was constantly on world of warcraft we had to set boundaries later on because I found he wasn't making any time for me and it was constantly on twitch either watching or streaming himself or playing world of warcraft or League of Legends or whatever else he got pretty bad but we work through it his obsession with twitch kind of dwindled down and we were both seemingly happy however and I feel dirty even

24:01writing this I feel worthless and absolutely disgusted and unwanted please don't judge me too harshly one night before bed as I was getting ready to lay down he was watching a stream on his tablet of some famous possibly twitch female streamer I happened to glance over and she was pretty scantily clad big nerd glasses hits hanging out I thought whatever it's just him watching a game this went on for a few nights in a row each time it was a different girl it watched for a bit to turn it off and immediately want to have sex I've secretly felt like shit over it but I guess last night kind of broke the camel's back he set up a stream started coming on to me in bed and left this tablet propped up on the night table I was going along with his advances but attempted to close the tablet when he told me no leave it on I want to watch her while I do you I was pretty much in shock didn't know how to respond started crying and left for the night he didn't even really attempt to stop me got a half hour sorry as I was leaving thankfully my parents lived like 5 minutes

25:05away so I spent the night there since I left he's attempted to call twice and has texted me twice one text was to tell me I'm overreacting am I how do I approach this I thought we were over it I thought we had a decent relationship but he clearly prefers watching women play video games over just having sex with me by approach him or wait for him to approach me comment as to a p not worthless or disgusting what your boyfriend did was extremely disrespectful and you're right to be upset watching scantily cry girls is one thing plenty of people like to watch porn or other similar things what he's doing is basically using your body while he thinks of other people which is pretty gross be firm with your boundaries if he still brushes it off then you should probably get a better boyfriend hope he says yeah which is why I feel like absolute shit I don't think he realizes this and to me it seems like he sees nothing wrong with what he did he's accused me of overreacting and he's basically said that other guys probably do it so it's

26:08fine he's hinted at masturbating to this twitch content before not even porn he meant actively masturbate the women playing video games that seems odd to me I don't know I feel used and dirty miss miss fit says what's really crazy is that he didn't even have enough respect to bring it up like of course my girlfriend might be in five but I look at another woman on my computer I think it's pretty obvious that the second he gets one of these female gamers to show a bit of interest in him he's out the door if says right even said I want to watch out while I do you basically I don't even have to acknowledge that it's you I'm having sex with I want to pretend it's her the audacity is astounding he's lucky that crying was the ascend of her actions other commenters said yeah I'm not sure that Opie should hear this but it seems like for him this is just a step up from masturbating to twitch girls now he gets to actually have sex and all his imagination has to do is replace his real life partner for the objects of his infatuations I hope you're replacing that cross my mind I'm okay with hearing it like rationally I know that's

27:11essentially what happened I guess I shouldn't even say I'm shocked because I've been pretty sad about the whole relationship for a while but I constantly hoped it would change like he promised so many times pretty stupid huh commenter said to that not stupid at all can't blame you for being positive and optimistic and wanting it to get better probably time to seriously consider whether you think this is fixable though Opie says I've pretty much molded over all night after speaking with him over coffee his response solidified everything and I'm totally done with the relationship I'm going to hour and she crosses the hour and put his place to pick up anything I can fit in my car thankfully the lease is up soon anyway I just won't be resigning my parents are more than happy happy stay for as long as I need to but I'm already looking into apartments I've officially resigned from the relationship so Opie came in with her up then said last night I decided to get together for coffee with him mostly because my mother urged me to I never told her the extent of what exactly happened but she knows it's video game related because we've gone over this problem

28:13before in the past anyway I initiated the conversation by a text and he agreed to meet me I guess I don't know what I was expecting closure maybe because I was pretty sure I wanted to end it and stop trying to work things out because I've been working things out for the past five years it's become tiring anyway he got into defense mode right away basically listing all the things I've done wrong in a relationship and ways over me these are the things I've done wrong one I declined to go to career last year for vacation he's so badly wanted to go I knew if I went I'd be left alone every day because his buddy would have come to also there was a big League of Legends tournament happening at the same time so he would have been doing League of Legends related things and mentally masturbating to the cosplayers all the time while I explored the city alone or hung out in a hotel I said I wasn't interested in going he got huffy but eventually got over it also I thought two I changed my appearance even though I knew he liked women with

29:13long ground hair I decided to cut my hair fairly short and bleach it blonde not too long ago it was time for a change anyway and I'm very happy with how it turned out he was not three I always refused to wear revealing clothing it constantly badger me about how I don't wear enough stuff that shows off my tits and legs I'm fairly modest and I'm not into that kind of stuff I'm more comfortable in a t-shirt and jeans it want me to wear a sundress and plunging tank tops I always said no or my birthday gift this year was a pair of those giant wrap around headphones edgier I don't know what they're called all the twitch streamers are wearing them but he spent a fairly good amount of money on them which sounds sweet I guess but I had originally complained that my old headphones suck and I need new ones for the gym he got me these bulky ones and got upset that I don't wear them much he asked me in the past to wear them put my hair in pig tails and wear revealing clothing around the house while wearing my glasses not even kidding this guy is a major stereotype five I didn't play League of Legends and I didn't enjoy sitting

30:16on the couch watching him play hours of League of Legends I didn't know how to play the game I tried numerous times I suck I didn't enjoy myself why would I keep at it six and I was not open-minded about anything this is pertaining to the situation in the original post I'm not open-minded enough out being as flesh like so this hurts his feelings too I'm not accepting of his kings which is a total fucking lie because I've already agreed to do some pretty out there stuff in the past to appease him I'm very open-minded about sex I would have appreciated a forewarning about the twitch girl joining us in bed though seven I didn't get along with his friends I tried to so hard I tried to relate to those guys like you wouldn't believe but they all literally have zero social skills they're awkward and blatantly ignored my existence whenever I was around let's start talking about things they're interested in and just disregard anything I ever said they'd invite him to board game nights asking if I'd be going to like they don't want me there I was pretty much an outcast they know I tried they just didn't want me to be around then

31:21conclusion I told him I was done he didn't react dramatically I think he's done with a relationship too you can watch all the twitchy wants now and play League of Legends for 23 hours of the day that must be quite a relief I'm going to the apartment to pick up whatever I can later I'm staying with my parents until I find a new place I feel oddly calm and okay with how everything's gone down in these last couple of days this is almost a relief thanks everyone commenter applies to be saying are you kidding I play video games and I want to kick the crap out of him if you ever talked to him tell him some loony on the internet says you're the reason women don't like gamers asshole and another commenter says that whoosh sound that was the bullet you just dodged wait he's 28 oh hell no you're so much better off without him and a lot of people just commenting that she put up with this for five years that is just absolutely grim isn't it this dude the thought of him and I didn't want to imagine this but the thought of him having this tabloid and thinking oh

32:23I'm just gonna pop that on the side there and watch that while we get it on it's just it's just fucking wild isn't it he bloody was but now I'm gonna turn this one to you guys what do you guys make of this situation how would you deal with it if it was you let us know your thoughts down in the comments below just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories your love your support your time it always means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and hopefully I'll see you in the next one take care and much love hey y'all it's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfarer where delivery and setup are as easy as a few taps

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