Tracy Moore-Grant: An Amicable Approach to a High-Conflict Divorce

Most divorces never reach a courtroom. Tracy Moore-Grant says that one fact should change how you start: not by gearing up for a fight, but by choosing people whose whole aim is to resolve it.

Tracy Moore-Grant has practiced family law for 22 years near Atlanta, where she is also a mediator, a parent coordinator, and a guardian ad litem for children. Around 2019, worn down by watching cases turn hostile because of the professionals involved, she founded the Amicable Divorce Network, an international organization that vets attorneys, financial professionals, and others on experience, a resolution focus, and fair billing. She likes to say the network is full of golden retrievers, not pit bulls.

In this episode, Tracy and Lisa talk about keeping a divorce as low-conflict as the situation allows, even when one person is not. Tracy explains how the amicable approach differs from collaborative divorce, including why it does not make you surrender attorney-client privilege or start over with new professionals if the case ends up in court. They walk through the red flags of a high-conflict lawyer, from guaranteed outcomes to hostile emails, and why hiring for anger means paying for anger.

They also get into the bigger picture: why attorneys are the true gatekeepers of court conflict, how the network trains professionals to work through hard roadblocks like addiction and personality disorders instead of running to a judge, and why a second opinion is always your right. Tracy closes with what to ask before you hire, including how often a lawyer actually ends up in court, and why the beginning of a case, before any expensive mistakes, is where your options are widest.

As always, this is strategic education, not legal or mental-health advice for your specific situation.

🎓 What you'll learn

• Why hiring the "pit-bull" attorney usually costs more and gets you less
• How the Amicable Divorce Network vets professionals on experience, resolution, and fair billing
• How an amicable approach differs from collaborative divorce, and keeps your confidentiality
• The red flags that tell you a lawyer will escalate a case rather than resolve it
• Why getting a second opinion on your case is completely your right
• Why attorneys, not just the parties, are the real gatekeepers of court conflict
• Why the large majority of cases settle, and what it means to start by resolving
• The questions to ask before you hire, including how often a lawyer actually goes to court

⏱️ Chapters
0:00 Intro
1:00 The pit-bull myth, and setting your money on fire
3:00 What the Amicable Divorce Network is, and why it vets professionals
5:00 How it differs from collaborative divorce, and keeps your privilege
7:00 When a cooperating case turns: Lisa's $80,000 lesson
9:00 The red flags of a high-conflict attorney
13:00 Your right to a second opinion, and who your lawyer works for
17:00 Being a teammate, and taking strategic oversight of your case
19:00 Training professionals to resolve hard cases instead of running to court
21:00 Why over 90% of cases never see a courtroom
31:00 Starting right, and the questions to ask any attorney

Keep going 💜
Book a free 30-minute discovery call and we'll help you map your next steps: https://beentheregotout.com/call
📘 Been There Got Out: Toxic Relationships, High-Conflict Divorce, and How to Stay Sane Under Insane Circumstances — https://www.amazon.com/dp/194627495X
📘 Been There Got Out: When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You (our parental-alienation book) — https://www.amazon.com/dp/1967674183
🔗 Tracy Moore-Grant at the Amicable Divorce Network: https://www.amicabledivorcenetwork.com/

🎧 More with Tracy Moore-Grant on this podcast
Ep 237: What a Child-Centered Divorce Really Means

About Been There Got Out
Chris Barry and Lisa Johnson are high-conflict divorce, custody, and co-parenting strategists, and the founders of Been There Got Out. They know these cases from the inside: both have successfully represented themselves in family court. Few attorneys have a playbook for a case like this — Chris and Lisa write yours with you, so you and your kids can get through it as unscathed as possible.