Ali Siddiq

Guys, hi. My guest today is real funny. Can you sense the tone that I'm like real funny implying that maybe some other people have had on aren't real funny?

He's he's got eight specials. What are we come up with eight? So we're at nine nine specials on YouTube. He's literally when they talk about getting it out the mud.

This guy got out the mud. No corporate support. No literally did it by himself. Hand to mouth.

Trent warfare street fighting. He's now on tour. He's on the custom fit tour.

And he's doing an arena in Baltimore. I don't think that's going to be the only one. I would assume you're doing a arena. It's a lot of places.

Hopefully is this air and so on. Yeah. So it's the it's the end of the in the shadows tool custom fit starts in eight. Oh, okay. And that's the arena starts, but it's the same thing.

You know, just go. I'll be sitting. Just go. Just hit. I'll be sitting. Hit some. There's going to be stuff at the in the show notes. Click start clicking shit about. I'll be sitting.

All right. All right. Here's my feelings about you. I've always thought like, oh, this guy is interesting. This guy is genuinely interesting. Like funny, et cetera, but more than that.

Interesting and layered. So what's the short

explanation of what your life has been for people who don't who are completely unfamiliar with you? I think it's just been a life roller coaster, you know, of being

ungrateful, then being having some sort of gratitude and then being ungrateful again and then learning to be more grateful, you know, with, you know, I just I just spoke about this that

every time I buy a pair of Chuck Taylors, I should hug my mom or call her and apologize, you know, for putting her through that type of trauma of

unbalanced, you know, thoughts of her son being incarcerated when I could have just accepted the chucks. I didn't I didn't need the

Bo Jackson's. All right. If you if you're picking up, he did six years in prison, not like prison.

And what you're in what you're saying is it wasn't enough to just wear trucks. You had to get some fly shit and then you need the money, et cetera, et cetera, which I could have found another way to get money, but

that that was what was presented at the time that you get a bunch of fast money, you know, and slow money as I have found out in

comedy slow money is a little better. Last longer, you know, you have more fun, you know, and you you have a little more gratitude, you know, I think that's what

the base of me learning is gratitude, you know, having been grateful for the experience. When were you not grateful? Because that's it's funny that you brought that up so quickly.

But comedy in the beginning to stand up and in life in the beginning, you know, those years of, you know, from like when I understood things from like, let's say, from eight to like 14, 15, very ungrateful, you know, because it's not like I wasn't eating. Yeah, you know, that's the thing. So, and I had this concept of people like I grew up poor. When did you know?

You know, when did you when did you know that you didn't have or was it just not enough for did you see somebody and you felt like, okay, I don't have that.

Yeah, you know, because if everybody is doing the same thing in the place that you are, then how did you know this is what they call Paul, unless you see somebody else. I thought, I thought my cousins were poor. That's no like a lot.

Why what's the different over they doing that? What was what made you go like, oh, so nestly quick, right. Yeah, we always have milk to put that in. Yeah, they would mix it with like water and sugar and make some like little chocolatey.

Watery drink like that was awful. But I was like, so you don't have milk like you don't put this meal like they know this. This is a water thing.

It knows it's not a water thing. It says, use milk right on the thing.

You know, like with man, which like I remember my stepdad used to try to just put ketchup and onions and ground beef. It was like, oh, this is a man, which no, it's not

man, which is a can and it tastes different and it's sweet. A man with the powder right now. It was in the can. You would put

make ground beef and then you would pour the man with sauce. Oh, right. Make the make the hamburger like, man, like my mom never did this.

Yeah, she just works. She just worked two jobs and went to school. It's like you, it's not like you're not eating. It's just we weren't eating the exact.

And we didn't live in like I remember living in some terrible apartments and mom's like, oh, we only had temporarily like she.

She knew that this was a temporary situation. So then we moved to some better apartments. Then we moved to some better apartments.

And I got in trouble when we was in the best apartments. And then I really saw it getting trouble. We moved in the house.

In a nice neighborhood. That's not that's not supposed to happen like that. Right. Yeah. I'm thinking in my mind like really when I look back on it, like.

So you selling drugs and you live in a house and you go to a highly academic school. You know, it's not like you go to and your sister. What was it, Puberty?

I don't know. It's outside. But do you know what I mean? But it's like 14. I wasn't sure. I wasn't sure enough to mentally to be outside to be my own person. Yeah, I think that's what it was.

You were just flopping around in the winter. She was in the wind. You know, just not really trying to figure out what manhood was.

And hanging around the wrong people who were portraying to be men when you like. But you still seeing real men do to work and had and went to real jobs. And, you know.

So that's the thing. It was just scared thinking of what manhood was and then wanting to be a bit wanting to be the bad guy. Like I'm being the streets like Goofy is hell.

What do you think about it? Your dad, but so your dad was a hustler drug dealer, right? No, my dad owned a carrier service. What was he doing? What's the story about you? But he sold pot of cocaine. It's so my dad started his care.

The service downtown is with his friend named Ivory. So this is before the people on the bikes. Yeah, before fax machines and all this stuff. So they were carrying legal documents from businesses and lawyers. And they had to get signed to know the rights and all this stuff. Right.

So they had these blue bank bags locked in like attorneys would have cash money then like everybody moved cash. They would take cash and very trustworthy. But these guys were snorting powder.

The delivery guys or the attorney's got it. Yeah, they was snorting powder. And all these businessmen was snorting powder. So my dad was like, you know, I sell them some powder. Yeah.

They own my route. I'm already there. You know, so he used to put cocaine in these little brown vows where people used to, you know, yeah. And he was in an atmosphere. It's like, they still was like the 70s. Like, they were still like that studio 54 type.

Yeah. So he's snorting powder. He never sold crack. He just sold powder. When it was expensive. You know, Coke wasn't plentiful at that time. It was like, yo, you to be snorting coke, you had to have money. So it wasn't a.

It's funny because both the story, your story and your dad's story is not it's not like the. We didn't have anything and we had to scrap and claw and and sell drugs. And it's like, no, you were doing pretty good. My dad was doing my dad living this high rise.

Um, first of my saw a window that was like from the bottom always to the top upstairs. He stayed in this nice condo on gafting street called gafting in Houston upstairs downstairs loft type. It was really nice. My dad had a motorcycle. Yamaha going. He had a Z 28. He had this car from Germany. And then he had a Pooja.

And saying like he was doing really good in this carrier business. But pot of cocaine. He started selling that. And with long speed.

Hmm. So because you mentioned pills. Yeah, he's doing his pills. Like, like, okay. But it's not like that was his main stream of income. That was like the side. It's like. Yeah. Like, you know, it's like him. I never get. He didn't get caught to.

No, never got out with drugs. Nor did James and I were there with his boys that would help him with it. Like, my dad didn't need to do it. But then what happened is down the line. You know, he probably put some on his gums one time. And then I remember my dad. I was already selling drugs. And you were some cracker just. I was.

I was incorrect. Yeah. So it's I'm like maybe 17. Are you going to school in the summer? Oh, yeah. I'm always going to school. It was no other place to go, but to school. That's the only. That's only a place you can floss at school. It's really.

You're like the third person. Somebody said they used to go to school just to like. What's what's up? Like socialize and I was girls. That's why I was going. I'm going to go to school.

It's like you like you like school. Yeah, no school. Yeah. But now I got money at school. Strip baskets for everybody.

It's a different ball game. No, I've searched somewhere. I remember. I remember pulled up. No, at the school. You bought some. You get a trend basket for the on the house. Yeah.

Strip basket. Everybody. My whole team. Strip basket. And I'm becoming a homecoming. And I had this little short mink on. And I was in a.

You at a mink. Yeah, a little short mink. A little short. Yeah, with the beak a little bit. Yeah, it was. It was. Wow. I was wild as hell in high school.

I was wild. How much is a mink cost? 800 bucks. It was like a mink jacket head leather right here. And it's on the.

On the. Right here on the. It was leather on the sleeve. Leather. But all the rest of it was mink. It was black. I love that jacket. Jack was crazy.

Where are you good girls? What? I was in girls way before that though. Yeah. Yeah. I was. I was all right. Well, dude. I was a break down some. Say no more. You know, you could spin. You good. Yeah.

Take out the cardboard. Yeah. But we're around the same age. Telling people what it was like to see break dance in the first time. It was. I'll never. I'm still like, what? What? Are you doing the worst part of that?

That is for when people wasn't in the era. And then they try to. Oh, I was around you. You wasn't there. And it's okay that you wasn't there.

You know, I wasn't in the 70s. I much. I like the 70s. I wasn't there. Yeah. You know, I didn't listen to Sylvester. And that wasn't that wasn't a disco era. No matter what my dad was doing. I wasn't there.

My dad explained to me one time that it's a huge difference between knowing about it and being there. Yeah. And he and he because you know, my favorite artist is Marvin Gaye. And he's like, you know everything about Marvin Gaye.

But you've never seen him. Yeah. And I was like, okay, huge difference. And then I think I got back at him later because I'm friends with George Clinton. Right. And like my dad loves Parliament.

Love Parliament. Love people. What's literally what's not so like that? And I was like, Hey, I remember what you told me about Marvin Gaye. I said, you know everything about people. But you never met George Clinton. And I like know him. And he knows me.

He doesn't know you know, he's not even curious. He don't know anything about you. Sir.

But I think that when you were in the era of it and people try to pretend as if they know it just hurts you.

Because if you in your 40s, I'm 52. I was 12 when you were born. Yeah.

You're not if we're not close to this. I don't care how many cousins you have. You're not the same. Yeah. As me because I was around for real. Like I understand things a little bit more because I was around.

I would never try to explain to my mother about what was going on in 73. I was born in 73. She was already. She had problems. 20. Yeah.

She had my sister. Yeah. She had my sister already. Yeah.

All right. So you're your you. So you because I think whenever I know guys that are like clearly intelligent. Right.

Like you read intelligent. You speak into and then you get your selling drugs. And I always think like.

So to hear you say that you didn't have to sell drugs. It wasn't like, you know, rats and I wasn't.

It was it was a it was a choice. Good schools. Good. So and it isn't. And it was. Is it ego? Is it just simpler? Is it just fast money?

Just fast money. Trying to really project and really just projecting something that I'm really not even about.

That kind of makes you something that you're not about laid on. Like I wasn't really quite jovial kid.

Then next thing I know. I'm a little more violent. The volatile. Then I should be only because I'm being shaped by what I'm doing. Right.

You know, and I wasn't like this when I was playing football. I wouldn't like to not play basketball. I wouldn't like this when I was playing.

I go seek outside my friends. It's like this occupation is changing the.

Your spirit. My whole everything. So then when you get incarcerated.

Slow down. How do you how do you get caught? And did you because you say in the special like you're either going to you're going to jail early or later.

And if you deal drugs.

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So what when you got caught, was it like the head you almost got caught before, then you got caught never even.

K-pop demon hunters, Haja Boy's breakfast meal and Huntrix meal have just dropped at McDonald's. They're calling this a battle for the fans. What do you say to that, Rumi? It's not a battle.

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You can really feel the respect in this battle. Pick a meal to pick a side.

Participate in McDonald's while supplies last. No glimpses of getting caught. But how long and you were doing it four years?

Yeah, I'm on my way out the door. Like I'm actually out the door. Like I'm done.

Then my partner called me and was like, hey, need you to make this one run with me. I was like, man, I'm pretty good.

I just make this one run me. You know, we're going to split the bread. I'm like, all right. How much?

It was a split of 92 grand, you know, between me and him. But I'm already good.

Yeah. What were you going to, what was, what were you planning for your life?

Oh, man. I was in college. So I was like, you know, I'm in the school and the crazy thing.

How old are you? I'm 19. I'm getting ready to be 19. I am on the verge of, I'm going to either be a Navy SEAL or a fireman at this time.

Like I'm like, I'm going to get, get something to do something else. You don't need to go to school for either of us, do you?

Okay. Just want to why Navy SEAL and why not cop?

No, no. So is the Navy SEAL not a cop for the world?

If you, if however you look at it, all I know is Navy SEAL sound sexy.

No, no, no, no, of course Navy SEAL. Like you, when I say I'm a Navy SEAL,

that is a whole different part of the game. Yeah.

Yeah. It just sounded better. And my sister went to the Navy.

Okay. So my sister was gone to the Navy. But I'm going to school because of different world for sure.

Literally the sick, I'm different one. Yeah. For sure.

Going to school. And then I wanted to be, I wanted to join a fraternity. It was crazy when I saw them.

I'm like, all right. I'm like, I got money. I'm cool. I'm a gavison for Memorial Day.

This is where everybody goes. And then definitely all the big time drug dealers.

We go to Memorial Memorial Day. We at the beach. We at gavison.

Just run like everybody. It's just, this is when they, it's the, it's the seawall.

It's when everybody bring, they cause out. Cause it's a, it's a thing.

All right. So I got, I have a BMW on five, 33. I, what come?

No champagne. Okay. No. This is, and this is when we didn't ride 10.

We didn't do 10 back then. It just hadn't taken off yet.

No. You wanted people to see who was in the car.

Did you have the, this is another thing that if you weren't there.

Did you have the neon under the, no, I remember that.

Yeah. My boy handed me on this truck. I'm like, I was always, and I was like this now.

I just keep my car like it comes. I buy it like it is.

I don't put no system in it. Cause it's already a system in it.

I don't put no different wheels on it. I may get a different tire.

But that is about it. I'm not, will you get rims?

When you say tire, it's going to come with rims.

Okay. Well, I'm going to just get, I'm going to get some Michelin's.

Just a better tire. Just a better tire.

But I'm not doing things because it's like, I don't want it.

I want it. It's responsible for us.

I'm getting better radios. I want it factory.

You know, I just want the car factory because I'm a bad night.

I'm going to buy the car that I want.

Yeah.

Like now I have the car that I want.

And it looks like it looks and it's nice.

When I pull up, it's not like people like, I don't know.

Oh, okay.

Are people are impressed?

Yeah, they always impressed.

Great.

When I pull up is...

I got to think in you living Houston, right?

I got to think you're in the top five valley favorites.

Oh, yeah, for sure.

I can go top three.

Cause I don't even know who else is it.

Who wants to be in it?

It's some people that's going to be in it.

But I'm definitely, when I pull up my car,

they go, you know how they park all the good ones in the front?

Yeah.

I'm definitely.

Of course.

Is Katie in the top three thing now?

Kevin Durant?

He may be, but you got Slim.

Slim is definitely going to be in the top three.

You got, you still got Jake Prans, you got...

Oh, yeah.

You got a lot of rappers.

Yeah.

Well, that's what I'm saying.

You got a lot of rappers.

Then you have some people that's very understanding.

Who Slim?

Slim Tho.

Oh, yes.

Okay.

He's got a fleet of cars.

Okay.

And he's, you know, anyone who's going to be in the front.

Do you...

What if 50 or 100?

Depends on what I'm at.

It depends.

If I'm at the mall, 50 or 50.

Yeah.

I'm at a restaurant.

100, yeah.

Cause you got a girl.

Are you married?

Yeah.

Okay.

It's just...

I knew what the system was, and I don't know why.

I don't know why you give 50 to mall and 100 to the restaurant, but I agree.

Yeah.

It doesn't...

There's no logic.

There's no logic to it, but it's just...

It's just...

It works.

It's an unwritten rule.

Cause you're on a date at the restaurant.

It's more sophisticated.

It's something swabbed.

And you're going somewhere nice, you know, you're in state 48, you know, someone like

that, which we definitely go on the state 48.

Sure.

Yeah.

I'm not hard to find in Houston.

Sure.

In state 48 on the Thursday.

Oh, Wednesday.

Okay.

Right now.

Okay.

Okay.

So, you get...

You go for...

What's the...

Where'd you guys go to get the...

No, we had it.

To do the run.

So, what is it?

You got a...

What do you got to do?

Just drop five kilos off to somebody.

In Houston.

In Houston.

I'm with him.

And...

Half hour drive?

Something like that.

I just know when we left the house, I was like...

I mean, it's still a lot of police kind of like around.

Like, you know, I wouldn't normally see this many police cars.

And it wasn't a thing where you were especially attuned to police because you got...

Yeah.

Like, I wouldn't be thinking about it.

But now, I'm like...

It's kind of a lot of cars.

Like, it's a lot of...

Like, and I'm sending them random places.

I'm like, oh, that's odd.

Okay, that's odd.

We get to the drop off place.

We do.

We get different vehicles.

If I may, where do you pick it up?

Is it a residential?

We at the house.

Okay.

So many times.

We at his house.

Okay.

Leaving his house.

We in the Ashtray van.

We in Moe.

Ashtray van.

I mean.

And then we stopped transferred to his car in the truck.

And he had a...

Well, E-series, beans, light blue.

So he got it.

So he's going to...

Not come to the parking lot, but we are.

We're going to the meeting place.

Out my job is always go count the money first.

And make sure everything is straight.

Where do you do that?

At the hotel where we were supposed to meet them at.

Okay.

Okay.

So, he knows two things are going to happen.

If it's a bad situation.

What would he tell?

I'm just going to ask.

Well, this is like...

What is the name?

Not a nicer.

Like a date or something.

No, no, no.

It's like a motel.

I can't even remember the name of the joint.

Motel six or something like that.

It's some weird hotel.

Get out.

We backing in.

And me and Motel together.

And we go in the room.

And I remember when I think back on it, I remember.

And I should have known.

But I did know.

I asked you the bathroom.

In the room.

I don't know y'all.

Let me show you what's wrong.

And he's like...

Because I always would...

Anytime I would come into a hotel, I'm always going to check the bathroom.

I ain't trying to jack us or something.

But we don't have nothing with us.

We just come into account.

The money makes sure the money's there.

But if I sense that it's a problem, I'm going to shoot first.

And ask questions later.

Because in my mind, I would leave everybody in this room.

And the money.

I'm not murdering y'all.

It's going to be a self-defense thing.

I think they were trying to jack me.

I left the money and everything.

So I wasn't killing them for the money.

I don't like this.

I'm like...

Let me show them.

Oh, I told it's out of order.

They got to come.

I ain't...

Jay, why was y'all being here with the toilet out of order?

I don't know.

Whatever.

And I'm...

Keep looking at the light.

Because the light is in the bathroom is on.

And I'm like...

I'm going to get a shadow.

But then when I'm talking to them, they step in front of me.

So I can't see the bathroom anymore.

What are your rights at this point?

Could you have walked and gotten away with it?

Probably so.

Right.

I hadn't done that yet.

Right.

So when they put the money out, they're like, this is the money X, Y, Z.

Oh, okay.

So when I go on the bank, get the money.

I was talking to the money.

I was like, what's these numbers on this money?

They're bank numbers.

They come from the...

Where are the numbers?

On the bottom, right up under what the numbers would be.

That's all money.

There's some other numbers that's on the money.

And I was like...

I was like, what is...

Nothing's going on the bank numbers.

This money came from the Franklin bank.

So when I always...

When I was drugged to your money.

When I think about collector's Franklin bank, right?

It starts, you know, when Franklin is the county jail in Houston.

So, yeah, they run in this thing.

I wish they would get it from Franklin bank.

What a whole drug money.

So are you...

What's your stress level at this point?

Is it more just like disorientation or like vague?

Like, what the fuck's going on?

I'm chilling right now.

Because I'm taking the money out of the bag.

Because I want to see.

And then when I look at the money.

I start putting the money back in the bag.

Without even counting it.

I put the money back in the bag.

I'm not going to tell you.

I was just random knocks.

Which is letting Mo know.

Which is the signal.

Hey, we finna get out of here.

These are police.

So, I put the money back in the bag.

I thought we good.

And they're like, you taking the money back in the bag?

No, y'all hold it.

Walk out.

I tell Mo.

I say, hey.

When you walk down the Charles.

Tell him not to come to this park or not.

And then when you come back, then we'll drive off.

Because this is the...

This is for these.

But before that, when we were sitting in the diner.

Because what we...

What a hotel is.

We were sitting in the diner with other people.

And I asked.

I said,

Why ain't nobody checking out of this motel?

Like, ain't nobody checking out.

What time of day was it?

It's like 12.30.

Yeah.

I said, nobody's checking out.

Y'all noticed it?

Nobody's checking out?

It's not even a...

Is that the kind of thing you would notice?

Yeah.

Because I'm always been...

I'm the most observant of the team.

So, I'm like, nobody's checking out.

And y'all noticed that there's no cleaning lady.

Like, going up...

Because there's an outside one.

There's no cleaning person.

I mean, you just...

No, I'm like, I'm...

Okay, whatever.

So, you went to the diner to like...

No, we was waiting on the people to tell us what...

No, I'm saying beforehand.

You went to the diner to like...

No, we were just waiting in there.

Like, got it.

Whenever they tell us what the whole...

What room they in.

So, once they told us the room, we were going down.

So, we backed up...

I backed the astro van up.

So, I could see the room.

Because I didn't want them to be behind me.

So, I want to see the room.

Mo was walking.

This is the story that I get after the melee happens, right?

So, I'm sitting there.

I've packed up things, getting things out the way in the...

In the astro van.

Because we got to get out of here.

I see Charles pulling his car into the parking lot.

I'm like...

But he's too far away from me for me to say anything.

And I'm like,

You know, what is going on?

And I'm like...

He gets out.

He opens the trunk.

And the guy who looks in the...

Because he had on the hat.

Now...

Is that one of the cops?

No.

The guy who...

The informant that then set us up.

That he's going to be buying a drug phone.

Yeah.

He had a...

He had got shot in the past and had a...

A hole through his jaw.

That it healed up.

So, this dude...

This is when it went crazy.

So, I'm in the driver's seat.

You know, astro van.

You can turn and run straight all the way through the back.

Because it's captain seats.

And...

And we had the seats moved.

And I...

When that dude...

When Charles opened the trunk...

That dude did like this.

And took his hat off.

Like...

Very unnatural move.

Like...

Are you like blown away by this much dope or something?

Like...

You're like...

Wow.

Exactly.

So...

I take off running through the astro van

and jump out the back double doors over his fence.

Because I knew...

I knew what happened.

I knew it.

So...

It's like...

How I didn't...

So, your friend who you said...

Go tell...

When you go to him...

I'm gonna get to that.

Sorry.

This is what...

When he took that hat off...

To signal that that dope was in that trunk.

Just imagine 60 people all of a sudden being in this room.

Like somebody come from out of curtains.

Somebody come from the lamp.

Somebody come from the table.

Yep.

Cops are coming.

Feds are coming from everywhere.

Every place out of cars.

Many come out the ice machine.

They come out of everything.

So, I jumped over the thing and I thought they didn't see me.

So, I'm running through this field.

And Charles managed to jump in his car.

And now he got them on a high speed chase.

Everybody else is caught.

So, I'm on foot...

Charles and the car.

They didn't see me though.

Where they...

How they wanted to get you?

They did.

It was a good...

It was a good little chase.

I really was making it happen.

Were they on foot?

They was on foot with me.

But I was bury-sandering the shit out of these car.

How they get here?

Oh.

So, it's just...

It's just by you, right?

You since knowing the by you.

Yep.

I'm just trying to make this by you because me and my mind...

Once I get to this bank, I'm going to swan dive all this bank into this by you.

And I'm gonna float my way back to freedom.

Yeah.

Going to New Orleans.

Yeah.

I'm out.

So, this...

This fit.

He running.

Got on too much stuff.

He grabbed my collar, my shirt.

And I...

Don't any fail.

He's tumbling.

You can see him tumbling.

I ain't got a...

Are these blackheads chasing or whiteheads?

White.

And...

So, this other guy...

He's right in front of me.

And I...

Juke him.

And he is out the way.

And I'm running.

And I'm thinking I got it.

And I did not see this one angle in with me.

And with that butted at rifle.

Boom.

Got on.

Down.

Where did you get your face?

Right inside the head.

With the right.

Then it's like...

It's like he must have been like a former rodeo cowboy or something.

Because when I fell and I'm rolling, he is like hog time.

He had to say that.

So, when they bring me back over.

So, they packing me back.

And they literally throw me back over the fence.

And my shoulder lands on the thing that stops the cause.

The cement thing that stops the cause.

And I mean, they got me in that room.

And I said the bathroom.

Somebody was...

The bathroom.

That's not working.

Oh, man.

Was it out of order?

I probably...

They got me in there.

And I never forget it, man.

This little small white guy, this big beard walks in.

And he says...

I'm not the god damn police.

I'm not a sheriff.

I'm the fucking fed.

Boom!

And you're going to tell me who was in that car.

And I was like...

No, I pretty much was not going to tell you that.

Boom!

Like...

Right hands to the jaw.

I'm like, man, I'm box.

This ain't...

This is my mind like, yo.

And I'm box.

Like...

Golden Globe style.

Like...

Are you cuffed?

You're cuffed.

Yeah, I'm cuffed.

And he's sitting on the toilet.

And he...

Right.

But I'm listening to the chase.

Charles is going ham.

He's doing a good job.

What do you mean?

You're listening to him on the radio?

He's going ham.

He's running there.

But they got the helicopter.

They got...

He on this road called Liberty Road.

Going too fast, loses control and flips his car.

And that's how they get in.

And I was like...

Bam!

They got in.

And I'm sitting in the back of the car now.

And Mo was in another car.

And I'm like...

Right?

So...

When they take us down,

I had to go to the infirmary.

And take us to the hospital.

I'm kind of beat up a little bit.

You got a couple punches.

So...

Come on, bud.

And then shoulder.

Next, Charles goes to the infirmary.

So we don't go to court.

We don't get a rain for like two days.

So when we finally get a rain, we get a rain together.

How many people are in the infirmary?

Just being Charles.

This is that county jail?

It is.

You know?

So...

We're not there at the same time.

I just know that Charles had to go to the infirmary.

So we get to court for the first time.

This is my first time seeing Charles and Mo.

And I'm like, y'all,

why are you coming to the parking lot?

It's like, what?

I said, why did you come to the parking lot with the door?

Because I told Mo to tell you don't come to the parking lot.

Because it was the cops.

He said something he said.

And I'm like, well, what the fuck did he say then?

And he's like, multiply, man.

Your boy nervous.

He was saying, he's thinking it's the face.

But it's good.

I said, but...

His mouth in the...

Yeah, his mouth's in the room with him.

So I said, what made you think I was nervous?

And then Charles, why was you listening to him?

Because I've been down with you since I was 14.

Why the fuck are you listening to him?

Because he's broke.

He's broke.

And his mind is, I'm going to get a portion of his money.

But he's broke.

Yeah.

Like, I said, you were fucking crazy.

And wouldn't you ever even know me to be nervous?

What am I nervous?

What am I...

What would I be nervous about?

So we figured out why he was in the parking lot.

And I'm pissed at him.

I still don't talk to Mo to this day.

I don't talk to Charles to this day because he lost his goddamn mind.

Or he's still lost his...

I haven't spoken to Charles in probably like eight years

because of a situation that happened between me and him

on something I wasn't even trying to do.

Like, his daughters...

Well, that this club that I used to do this comedy room at,

but they're there another night.

I wouldn't do a car.

I just came up there.

They have an apartment.

And I noticed, you know, and I can see how he can take this wrong.

Whatever do carries out the cake is the dude

that the ladies mess with.

Nobody...

Nobody lets anybody else carry the cake out.

If your wife is having a party at the club,

you're probably going to carry the cake out.

But this is his ex-wife.

And I'm getting ready to leave the club

and his daughters and his ex-wife, Roxanne,

are all leaving.

And they had this huge ass cake.

And I was like, at least you...

Let me...

You want me to carry the cake out for you?

I'll put it in the car.

And I don't think you will.

So I'm carrying the cake out.

Put it in the car.

And the next thing I know,

I wake up to my phone going off.

And I answer the phone.

Yo, what the fuck is wrong with you?

I'm not going to go over this.

You know who the fuck this is.

The fuck is you carrying out a cake, man?

Bates, what are you like?

The fuck is you carrying out a cake,

cake, fucking shit.

Who are you trying to book my ex-wife?

I said, Charles?

Is it?

Yeah.

I said, hey, man.

I was just fucking being nice,

carrying out the cake.

Don't carry out no motherfuckin' cake no more.

I was like...

And then it snapped in my head like...

Yo, who the fuck is you talking to?

I said, man, remember, remember this.

Remember what I used to do if I cruel?

I do that for me.

And only me in my family.

If you say something else fucking crazy,

when you call my phone again,

yeah.

And he's like,

you just don't be carrying out no motherfuckin' cake.

You're hung up on me.

I'm like, you're fucking insane, man.

I'm about to get a soul.

I'm like, Charles, it's fucking crazy.

And then I heard after that,

he got busted with doing some crazy shit

with a deal with some gang consoles

or something.

Got popped again.

We're all over the place.

Let's stay all over the place.

What do you think of violence?

Because you seem in the special I saw,

I've watched one special of a part four.

There's for a domino.

In fact, there's four parts.

I watched part one.

Between that and this conversation

and what you used to do,

what you quietly did for the crew,

you seem pretty comfortable with violence.

Or at home or not.

Well, you just think it's a part of life?

Nah.

I actually...

You got shot.

By the way, you shot somebody.

Yeah, I've shot somebody.

I don't remember, but have you been...

Yeah, okay.

Go on.

This is me with violence.

I've never, in 52 years,

I've never started a fight.

I've ended a lot of them

that I've never started one.

So, I take it like this.

If you're bothering me,

which is a person that is not bothering you,

I take it like this,

that you're trying to force your wheel on me.

And I have to show you

why that wasn't a smart decision.

And that's where I'm typically at.

Because I'm not going to start it.

Never have.

But if you put me in that position,

I'm more angry that you are putting me

in this position because you're making me

something that I'm really not.

And you're putting me in this position.

So, I'm going to feel extremely bad afterwards.

But I'm going to protect myself

and protect my interest

and I'm going to push the line

because it's a different...

Are you sending a message?

Yeah, man.

It's like, I'm a different...

You know, I watch this movie one time,

The Ice Man.

The HBO one?

Yeah, the...

It was a documentary, yeah.

It was a documentary, the Ice Man.

It's about a guy...

He was the Contra-Caliph of the mile.

Contra-Caliph of the mile.

But other than that,

he was a pretty nice guy.

Yeah.

I will say I didn't...

I resented how like...

I'm just a regular guy.

It's like dog.

But he was...

Through his family...

I'm with you.

His family never...

His family never thought anything.

His family was like,

Yo, he's a good guy.

And the part that I resonate with was this.

Remember the three...

Because he didn't want to...

He killed other kind...

Bad people.

The part...

The ones that he had a problem with

was the Three College Boys.

Remember the Three College Boys?

The ones...

He was just...

He was driving...

Doos playing with him on the road.

And he was like, Yo, man.

Just gone.

Yeah.

And they kept trying to like...

Play with him on the road.

Play with him on the road with the van.

And so they stopped.

And he couldn't get by.

He's like, Yo, man.

Just...

Why don't y'all just go?

Like, why y'all doing this?

And...

He got out...

Yeah.

And then...

And then those...

You can see in his face,

these were the three people that he killed

that he just didn't want to.

And I think about it all.

I'm like, Yo, man.

I don't want to do...

Nothing to you.

That's not mine.

That's not my goal.

But if you...

If you think that it's sweet.

Okay.

But there's nobody that was locked up with me

that would tell you that.

They were like,

Are you talking about him?

Are you...

You wildest hell.

If you think that...

You think that you're going to run over him.

You're crazy as...

All out those like...

If people weren't here to tell you like,

No, that's who...

Because I was like that.

I was like this.

I don't like that in prison.

Yeah, I was like this.

Hey, man.

I'm cool, bro.

Like, who are you?

But who are you talking to, though?

Yeah.

And it's only like one or two times

I really had to really put my foot down.

Because I was too relaxed.

And then you like...

I know you're not trying to do this with me.

Yeah.

And I take it back to life.

The movie life.

One of the movies that I respect

because they depict the things correctly.

When I ask people about life,

when they look at the movie,

I'm like,

Who do you think was the most vulnerable opponent in life?

And most people always say tiny.

Do it with beating up Eddie Murphy.

I said,

That's what you think it was.

The most vulnerable?

The most formidable.

Formidable.

Yeah.

I said,

Guess what you think it was?

Tiny.

I said,

So I said,

When tiny was beating up Eddie,

Somebody said,

That's enough.

That's it.

Man's taking enough of a beat.

And then it stopped.

Right.

Immediately.

Yeah.

Who was it, Bernie?

No, that's enough.

It was the guy who was telling the story at the end.

I have two things I want to say.

The best part of life is the blooper

where Eddie has goes,

This isn't my watch.

This ain't my daily watch.

Fucking should have been the funnier than the home movie.

Okay.

You say in your special,

Guy punches you in the face at 15.

A guy who's 64,

240.

Quancy.

Quancy.

Quancy face.

You then see him later.

Shoot him.

Yeah.

Okay.

Then you see him at prison.

Can't believe you're alive.

Can't believe he's alive.

No one can.

You hit him with a,

with a brush.

Shit a brush.

Shit a brush.

Shit a brush.

Which is,

Is that vibe?

That's more humiliation, right?

That's that dominant.

This brush is,

This brush is heavy.

Like you,

Yeah, you,

Yeah, you hurt people with this brush.

This is what we clean the toilet with.

Okay.

And it's made out wood.

It's a real heavy brush.

Okay.

And I don't know why they're giving prisoners.

Because you got to keep the toilet.

No, I can't,

I can't, I can't.

They moved on the hard plaster.

They moved on the plastic.

After the wood,

They moved on the plastic.

And the,

The plastic was still a bad look.

It's a little long.

So they're going to turn into something.

Yeah, we're going to turn the shit into something.

Then you see him at Walmart

and you get ready to jump.

Okay.

Right.

So,

I don't know if that's consistent

with what you just told me.

Is that,

Is,

Are you going to rain down the violence on Quincy

until literally he apologized, right?

I see double.

Out of my eye.

Every direction beside straight.

Because of him.

Because of him.

Yes.

I was 15.

Yeah.

You a grown man

when you hit me.

Yes.

And you snuck me from behind.

You broke five bones in my face.

Yeah.

I get it.

I had to have surgery.

Are you doing that for your surgery?

I am,

I am very similar to him.

I think I'm okay with,

Okay.

Okay.

I can say I'm okay.

But I haven't seen him since Walmart.

But I think I'm all right.

I think I'm,

I think I'm,

If I spoiler alert

in Walmart,

he's like,

he's in a walker

and finally goes like,

I'm sorry.

Okay.

So I'm with you.

I think I'm with you.

What are you?

What are you?

Who was that for?

Who's that?

Because you're not sending a,

you're sending a message to Quincy.

It's for Quincy.

Quincy, Quincy,

he got to understand

that what he did was so foul

that I never,

I've never snuck anybody.

I'm gonna always give you the fair fight.

If I lose, I lose.

But I'm not gonna sneak a God dang on key

it from behind.

It's like,

I know I'm,

I know I'm a selling dope,

but damn,

I'm,

my back is turned.

It was,

what Quincy did was wrong.

Definitely wrong.

What I'm saying here.

I think you got a little sympathy for Quincy.

No, I have,

I have all the sympathy,

I'm arguing with myself

because I'm a,

I wake up with grudges just like you do.

So,

so,

but I'm trying to talk myself out of them

because I,

because I literally go,

this is self-care.

I'm protecting past kneel

from,

and I'm,

and I'm,

there's some cosmic justice

that I'm dispensing on people.

And when I,

that's why I'm asking about violence,

like,

what do you,

I don't want to do it.

That's the,

the bottom answer is,

I don't ever want to really be violent.

You would have to push me

to that, that point.

And,

because I walk away from it.

Now, if you,

it's, it's ways to,

to get your feel

if that's what you're trying to do,

but I'm going to generally walk away

from something.

But if you,

if I feel like you're trying to intimidate me

or push me in a corner,

or if you have,

say if you have other people

with you,

mm-hmm.

Now,

you have peaked my interest.

Because now,

I want to,

I want to show you the difference between,

you,

so you think your people

are going to stop,

what's going to happen?

That's what you,

that's what you think.

That's what you think.

So,

you have,

you have put these people in jeopardy.

Yeah.

And I'm going to reign

on these people as well.

And I got to try to tell people,

I don't, I'm,

man, I'm nice, man.

I'm, I'm not,

and then I probably just don't talk

to people a lot.

I don't,

I stayed to myself.

Because I don't want,

that,

I have a problem with,

with,

it's hard for me to be out here in California.

Mm-hmm.

It's hard for me to deal with industry people.

And,

I hate that he was right,

but he was,

so did Gregory is so right

when he made him talk.

And he was like,

yo,

you're going to have to do a lot

of self-work on yourself

when it comes to dealing

with the industry.

Because you are too volatile

because you stand on manhood.

Right.

And you're not going to be able

to listen to bull

and be okay.

So, I'm, I'm trying to tell you,

to just yourself,

and I'm like,

man, I'm cool.

Man, that's old man.

And then,

and then,

I'm, I'm a straight shooter.

Say no.

Cool.

I'm cool with no.

I don't need your phone number.

I don't need your pretend

in front of people that we cool.

I don't need nothing

that shit.

I'm good.

If you over there,

I'm over here, fine.

I don't have no problem

with you being over there.

I don't have no problem

with me being over here.

I don't,

don't say no shit about me

that's not true.

And then,

it get back to me.

And I'm like,

the fuck are you talking about?

Yeah.

Did you get that from me?

Because I don't have no problem

telling you anything.

But, it's like,

yeah.

I don't get it.

Like, I was,

and I was just,

got named Herb.

That, that lives here,

that people know Herb

on,

we let this thing

from Malika's

and Tisha,

Tisha Arnold.

To Sheena.

To Sheena Arnold.

Show some respect

to a beautiful black queen.

Go ahead.

She wanted to,

she wanted to get my attention.

And,

he touched me.

And I turned,

I'm like,

man, why are you,

what's all the touching about, bro?

Well,

she wanted to,

I said,

what's wrong with my name?

You don't know my name?

You could've just simply said,

I'll leave.

And I would've turned around.

But, don't,

man, don't put your hands on me.

The fuck?

I,

I thought about it the next day.

And then I,

I DMed him.

And,

I said,

man, let me,

let me apologize to you.

Because you don't know that,

I don't,

I don't like,

people touching me.

You know what's all yours?

You have no idea.

So,

and then you touched me,

right on my brand.

You taught,

you tapped me on the brand

that's on my arm.

And then you tapped me on my arm

that's surgically repaired.

So,

sometimes,

my arm still be numb.

No, it's,

it's just tingling,

feeling from them putting,

uh,

cadaver tendon in my arm.

The nice people in prison?

No.

And, um,

when I was surfing,

I, I did it in 24.

So, it's not,

it's healed.

No.

It's healed,

but it's still,

uh,

yeah.

It'll never be the same kind of thing.

Yeah.

So, when he touched me,

I said,

you know, I'm just explaining,

I mean, you don't understand that,

and you don't know that,

but so,

I'm very aggressive when it comes

to this type of shit.

So, let me apologize,

because, you know,

I didn't mean no harm.

I don't think you meant no harm,

but I,

yeah, I'm not with the touch of shit.

And,

you think, man,

am I bad?

You know,

I didn't know,

you take that wrong,

and say something about me

and I've already apologized about it.

Then I'm like,

the fuck?

Yeah.

And,

all right.

Well, here's what I want to ask you.

So, you're,

you're one kind of kid,

at 14, right?

Mm-hmm.

Very joking.

Then you start,

Chovio,

just regular,

sweet hearted kid,

more or less, right?

I'm assuming.

Then you start,

you get on the street,

and you get darker.

People try to take advantage of you.

Right.

You get darker.

Mm-hmm.

Then you go to prison,

and I'm assuming you get,

twice, three times as dark.

First two years.

That's where the darkness...

First two years,

I was a freaking wild man.

And then...

What do you mean by that?

Oh, yeah.

Like, if you want to fight,

or you want to do anything,

I'm with it.

Like, I'm, I'm with it.

It's like in my mind.

I gotta...

It's like my...

You gotta establish your...

It's like my first year,

high school.

I gotta...

I gotta establish who I am.

Yeah.

I gotta make the varsity team.

You know what I'm saying?

It's varsity of violence.

I gotta...

Yeah.

Let it be understood, like,

hey, I'm not...

I'm not nothing to play with.

Then...

Black shirt.

It's got old cat name,

Black shirt.

It's like,

he wanted to talk to me.

Because he was trying to get the young people

to stop fighting so much.

How old are you fighting?

Oh, every chance I get...

What's the month?

What's the shit now?

Like every...

Every three days,

this year, it's a...

It's a wild place.

And are you getting, like,

you're getting at...

At it under your sentence,

or it's just like...

No.

People fighting, breaking up,

people don't know.

God don't know everything that's going on.

Oh, so just...

It's like...

It...

Yeah.

And it's a good...

It's a good time.

It's a good...

It's a good time.

It's a show.

It's an afternoon show.

It's a show.

Because people call on people like,

what would you want to do?

Like, whatever you try to do.

So...

Blacks are...

They...

The old...

Old guys get this...

They...

Unbeknownst to me.

This old guy was like,

yo, we need to try to get this June on the show

for all these young people fighting.

And Blacks said,

well,

the first person we got to get is him.

And he's like,

who?

The little one?

Yes.

The one who just threw the basketball

over the goddamn fence.

Like...

Like...

And I'm on the court,

and I'm arguing with somebody.

And I'm like,

I'm going to fuck about this man.

I threw the shit over the fence.

This is who...

It's crazy that it's the man who we got to get.

Because they literally...

Listen to him.

That kid's a star.

That kid's a star.

So they talked to me.

And I'm...

I'm laughing all the way through the conversation.

It's like,

I don't give a shit about what they talk about.

But it's his dude named Malik.

Oh, man.

I never get Malik.

Malik.

Short.

And he's like...

Barry Sanders built.

Like, he's a...

He had muscles on his hand.

Yeah.

And he's like,

Yo, man.

Let me tell you something.

Either...

You're going to listen to what we're saying to somebody.

It's going to kill you in this prison

from all this shit you're doing.

And I was like...

Are you all for somebody?

And he's like,

No, we're not the goddamn somebody.

You think it's a game?

I'm like...

No, I'm just asking...

Who's the somebody?

He's like...

He's explaining to me about...

Make doing time the right way.

So, I kind of...

I kind of chilled out.

What did you think your life was going to be?

That's what I never said.

I didn't eat you.

I got 15 years.

I got 15 years.

Oh, you got 15 years.

So, I got...

Man.

So, you think your life...

Four days of the...

At that turn 19, I'm locked up.

I got 15 years.

I'm going to get out of this shit when I'm 33.

It's over.

Shit.

What am I going to do?

I'm here.

Yeah.

And I don't...

This is my first time ever being locked up.

Work all I know is...

Nobody's going to do anything to me.

And I'm like...

I'm standing...

Because I'm here...

I am literally here by myself.

I'm by myself.

Meaning you don't know anybody.

I don't know anybody.

I'm by myself.

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First of all, I'm wearing Rag and Bone right now.

So, this...

I mean, we've cut the video of me doing my award winning stand-up with it.

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This is their denim.

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Okay.

They sent me a pair of these pants, right?

When I took them...

When I felt them in the box, I literally thought that was a mistake.

Because I was like, these are sweatpants.

I don't...

Rag and Bone doesn't sell sweatpants.

Rag and Bone Miramar.

Basically, I don't know what they're doing.

I don't know.

Guys, this doesn't seem legal.

We got it.

You got to get these things before they shut the whole operation down.

I got the wrong size.

So, I'm sending them...

I send them back in to get the right size, which was easy and great.

But I tried them on.

It was like weird when I'm like, these feel like sweatpants.

They had the look of denim.

Again, I don't know how they're doing it.

This isn't even the Miramar.

This is me.

This is just...

This is the other...

This is their none.

I mean, this is...

And this thing looks off.

Can I stand up?

No, I'm good.

No, this is good.

That's me moving.

This is a remote control for the telegram.

How versatile are they?

You can wear them to dinner.

You can wear them to do stand-up.

You wear them on a flight.

Those are the things that I do.

Train.

What else do I do?

My apartment.

Stand up.

Maybe up.

I guess I can wear them to the gym.

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Any A.L.

Guys, you know that I eat, right?

You know that I eat every, I eat a couple of times a day.

Cook unity.

I've done food delivery systems before.

There used to be a vegan one that I would do in L.A.

It was a little gulashi.

It was a little just felt like sometimes it's certain

my diet can feel like punishment.

Where it's just like, eat it.

It's got chickpeas.

And then I'm stuck with that.

Here's the thing about cook unity.

They got a lot of different chefs.

Many of them have won awards.

So on cook unity, you get to pick from hundreds of different things.

Right?

And that's, for me, I think I looked at vegan a couple of days ago

and I got like 65 results, which is incredible.

And it's not just chickpeas.

It's, we're talking about tofu.

We're talking about satown.

The problem with vegan stuff is it all sounds awful to people

that aren't vegan.

But I, it's a lifestyle that I believe in.

So you, I type it in.

And, and, and I, I just ordered two mushroom pastas.

I believe Rigatoni.

I, I got a tofu, a stir fry tofu.

I got like legit great stuff.

In fact, I filmed it.

I filmed the last delivery I got.

And we'll put that in now.

It's me taking stuff out.

Ice.

This is block of ice.

Put that in.

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Well, that's the last bag.

Book's fresh, y'all.

Let's go to the next one.

China masala.

Good.

They have a little printout of the chef with a picture of them on the thing.

So it feels like, you know, I'm not, I don't base it on looks.

I'm not going to be like, he looks like he can cook.

This guy cooks.

You can go buy chef protein, cuisine, dietary needs, filter macros down to the gram.

You just don't have to think about dinner.

That's the having a more of a family life now.

The amount of thinking about food for the kids is crazy.

And it's a nightmare.

And I would assume with cook unity.

I would assume I haven't needed to do it here.

They're not here.

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I'm sorry, they're this correction.

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Guys, I don't say this every day, but I've found a new psychoactive mushroom I want to tell you guys about.

And it's 100% legal, okay?

You know what?

I do talk about mushrooms more than most people.

But, all right, here's the thing.

It's called Amanita Mascaria.

I bought it from them a year ago.

I bought some psych, what they call psychoactive mushrooms.

They're not psilocybin.

They're like psychoactive.

It's a lot of gray area right now in the psychoactive market.

And I think we should all take advantage of it.

I personally have.

So I bought some.

I left them in L.A.

I'm currently in New York.

They came on as a sponsor.

Again, I'm manifested.

And they sent me a bunch the other day.

And they've gummies.

And I took one.

And I swear to God, it worked like a bit of a microd.

It was like, calm my brain down.

It made it a little just more chill, which I can use.

You've seen me.

You've seen what I do.

Yeah.

And it's legal.

So here it's called Amanita Mascaria.

It's a red mushroom.

You've seen it your whole life.

And you assume it was either deadly or amario thing.

It's neither.

Psychoactive, but not a psychedelic.

No visuals, no ego dissolution, want, want.

None of that.

The active compound hits your GABA receptors,

which is the part of your brain responsible for making you feel like

everything isn't on fire, which is getting harder to do.

But I swear to God, I took one last week and I promise you it worked.

You're not like, you're just like, you go, it's like any microdose

where at the end of the day, you go, oh, it's a good day.

And then you go, oh, yeah, I took that thing.

But you don't think about it after you've taken it.

At medium doses, it does more sedating, better sleep, more vivid dreams,

actual rest.

Some people call it nature's wine.

We're just pretty accurate.

That warm social relax feeling without the part where wine starts

making decisions for you and you feel like crap the next day.

I didn't get to the nature's wine level.

I got to like the chill, the chill level took one, like one of the afternoons.

You know what?

And I went on Reddit and actually say nice stuff about Amantara,

which is the name of the company, that it's good.

And like it's got, you know, 50,000 customers.

It's got a lot of products.

It's got gummies, capsules, extracts, chocolate bars.

They got the best price on the market.

Look it up on Reddit because they were all good reviews.

I stand by it.

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Were you kind of like that when you were 13, 14?

Or did the, it did like, the street.

I mean, I was, I didn't start something dope until I was 14.

And I was jovial then.

Then she started happening.

Quincey didn't happen until I was 15.

Right.

And I still, that, that what I was enjaded at that time still.

You know, I'm, I'm still kicking with my people.

But that, my turning point was endominal effect too.

People who've seen it.

My turning point was my sister died.

My baby sister died.

And that's when I really got bad.

Like I was, I was bad.

I was bad news at that time.

Him in prison.

No, I was in the street.

And my sister died on her 18.

Oh, God, I got to go.

So this is the, this is who I go pick up every day from school.

And walk home with them.

You know, this is my baby sister.

You know, she ate, you know.

So when she passed, I was depleted.

Like I, I didn't have anything.

Like I was probably the darkest to just like nihilism.

I don't give a fuck about.

I'll kill.

I don't give a fuck.

Sam, what's up to me?

We'll get you killed at that time.

Hey, what's up?

All right.

What's up with what?

Like my, I, I was purposely didn't have any understanding.

Because I was too wounded.

And I, and in that special, I kind of dealt with it and explained how bad I was.

Or bad off I was.

Because I didn't realize it.

How bad I was.

What did you think?

Did you, did you think?

How did it read?

I don't give a fuck?

Was it, did you ever think I'm sad?

Or was it just I'm fucked up?

Well, I think that because I didn't deal with everything at that time,

people have no idea that my sister passed months later my son,

my, my first born son passed and I didn't know it.

And I didn't even get a chance to go to the funeral or nothing.

So I'm like, you know, I'm shot.

Like I don't have no heart.

I don't have, I don't have anything.

I'm just really gone.

But you're still going to school and, and on the street.

But I'm still, still fucked up.

Like I'm really bad off at this time.

Yeah.

I'm masking a lot at this time.

Do you, were you drinking drugs?

Did you do anything with it?

Just like, just in it.

Yeah, I'm just in it.

You know, at that time it wasn't a,

you know, I know I could get anything, but I wasn't heavy or anything.

Never with my, my coping mechanism.

Was there like, records you could listen to, movies, you know what I mean?

Like, what, what captured it?

What felt, what's a piece of art or movie that is like, that's how it felt?

It's kind of like when you see Malcolm X or Martin Luther King's funeral,

how devastated people are.

Yeah.

The one for me is when Bobby Kennedy tells the church that Martin Luther King got shot.

It's just like, you hear, just like, it's, it's chilling.

Some very sad news for all of you.

And that is that Martin Luther King was shot and was killed tonight.

You're in that state for months.

You know, you know how on the Jefferson's, when Martin Luther King,

and they just ride, they just start the anger, the outrage,

they just start riding.

Brother Martin, you're dead.

You bastard!

That's what it was like in my head.

And at the time, the person who I would lean on, she's,

she's, my mom is gone.

She's worse off just as bad on me.

My mom is absolutely destroyed.

She's destroyed.

So you have to support her.

I can't support my mom.

Can you sit there next to her?

My mom is gone, bro.

My mom is so gone that I would be laying in the bed.

My mom just come and just lay next to me and just cry so hard.

It was bad.

When I think about it, how my family was just fucked up at that time.

And I think we was all just trying to run away from each other basically.

Because it was, it was crazy.

That was, that had to be, and it still is like the worst,

just the worst pain that I think I've ever experienced.

You know, it was so bad that my dad,

my sister would, with my dad's daughter,

and my mom's dad had already been sort of,

I remember walking out of the funeral,

and my dad was like in a distance.

And he was just crying.

He was just bawling.

And it was just,

crazy.

That was like the worst goddamn time.

And so me being still a kid and very,

even though I'm street savvy,

I'm still not emotionally stable at all.

I'm in pain,

and my mentality is to afflict the most pain

and people who cross me

or what the business that I'm doing as possible.

So, when I got inside,

I'm still in that place.

By the way, there's probably a lot of other guys in a, in a similar place.

Yeah.

I'm still in that,

in that hurtful place and like,

you know what I mean?

I've already had something taking away from me.

You ain't taking shit from me.

You ain't taking nothing like you.

You, you, you, you can't take up my time.

You can't do nothing.

And I didn't think,

I don't even think dudes was trying.

It was like,

I didn't seem like,

it's like a person that was a pushover.

It was like, you know what the fuck with that little dude?

Because his,

the coldness in his face tells it all.

Like he is like,

what the man would,

what's funny is you can still,

you,

all this reads on you.

Like I can,

without knowing it,

you have like a sadness.

And it's like,

it's like what I said layered.

I didn't know about any of that in particular.

But it's just like,

human, you know,

beams,

one to another.

It's like, yeah,

that guy's got

a lot of weight.

And,

and what do you make of that

versus the,

you brought up gratitude,

and then you,

and then you get out,

start doing stand-up,

and your life,

I'm assuming,

this has got to be around

your wildest dreams,

beyond your wildest dreams.

What do you make of it?

What do you make of that?

And this.

The happiest I am

is with my family.

Like my family really enjoys

when I'm around,

because I'm the person

that I was before,

14,

age 14.

Yeah.

And,

I'm like the weirdest dad.

You know,

my, my kids are,

I got old kids,

young kids.

So,

how old are your kids?

From 32 to 5.

Like I have my kids.

And,

the way I deal with them,

everybody is different.

And,

I have a,

me with Hanan,

is different than me

with anybody else,

because Hanan is the one

that I talk to about money.

He's,

she, she,

Hanan, she is.

And, I talk to Hanan a lot,

because I know that I have to

instill a lot of confidence

in Hanan,

because she was sick early on.

And,

I know that kind of,

hurt her development

of something,

because she could so many things

she could do.

And, you know,

because she was weak.

And,

now she's getting stronger.

And,

she's tall.

And,

she's gorgeous.

And,

I just always wanted to let her know

that,

hey,

hey man, you good.

You know,

and,

that's what I talk to about money,

finances.

And,

she's such a pit bull

when it comes to money.

And,

I was talking to her about my silver

and my gold.

And,

and then somebody else walked through

and said,

then they left and we start laughing.