A Billion Cold Turkeys (TNG S1E22)

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2:21Welcome to the greatest generation. It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys. Just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast. I'm Adam Pranaka. I'm Ben Harrison. How you doing, Adam? I'm doing great. Doing real great. I'm like Murdoch in Rambo for a split part two, though. A stinking bureaucrat that's trying to cover his ass. This is what I have read, maybe a historically hot weather week happening in Los Angeles. Another one. And another one. Give me something cold. You've got that coke machine that you don't have to put money in because it's unlocked, and you can just reach in. That was always the dream as a kid, right? Oh, yeah. To have the machine itself. You're so often you'd be wandering around in a government building or in a hospital where

3:24your parents are visiting an elderly relative. You'd see the guy surfacing the machine and you'd be like, hey, man, what's up? And he would slide you a little something. You ever get that? I never got that. No. No. If the door is open, I'm asking as a kid. Wow. I would say I had probably a 500 batting average on that. I think the guys surfacing those machines want to make a kid's day by letting them have a doctor pepper that they might not have gotten otherwise. Can I construct a different world view for you? Do you think that person also wants the kid to go away so that he can get back to work? You know what? I don't think that they are mutually exclusive ideas. Yes. They are the same. Ben, tell me about the last time you did that because there had to be a... a line in your life where you're like, I am now too old to ask for a free Coke from the person who restocks the Coke machine.

4:24Yeah. That had to be a sad day, right? I don't know. Do you still ask? I can't think of a time I've seen one getting serviced in recent memory. Like I think that both... Has been a long time, huh? Like we as a society have maybe taken a couple steps back from vending machine. You know, like I feel like a lot of the time in a hotel there's the ice and vending sign and then you go down to the end of the hallway and you turn into that space and there is an ice machine and then there's like a gap and you can see like the outline of where the vending machine used to be. I swear this wasn't intentional, but every time we start talking about vending machines we must also bring up the ultimate conclusion of our podcast, which is the full pivot into corner of elevator vending machine, which is the best business idea we've ever had. We've never done better. I mean, that's where everybody is going to be. Yeah. You know, it's like, it's as smart as the, you know, inexpensive sweet treats down at

5:29toddler level at the checkout in a grocery store. Like that is just going to hit a little bit more often because you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. And this way you're always taking shots, baby. The things in this corner elevator vending machine are the things that are not available in the minibar or the fridge that weighs all the things to make sure that you don't touch them and that you accidentally buy them. Things like, I don't know, like mint and beverages that don't come in that thing. Here is the killer app at them. Okay. All right. You know, minibar, like you look at that little little plastic one and a half ounce Casamigo's bottle. They might, they might be taking 12 bucks from your folio if you, if you take one of those out of the minibar, right? It's true. We've got them in the elevator for 11. Ben, I love, I love the, the strategy of this, but we also have to work with these hotels. Like they're not going to let us take money out of their hands.

6:30This must be a symbiotic relationship, wouldn't you say? I think you make a good point. I think we could sell them on. We're going to make it up in volume just by being slightly cheaper and you know, they're going to take a cut of every sale, right? People love a deal or the idea of a deal. I would say that this is the kind of forward thinking that you might want to do as a rubber band man style species where everything you're doing is to service your, your drug trade with another planet. Like you have got to be ahead of the issue of the, of the spaceships breaking down and you've got to be ahead of the issue of people at hotels wanting booze, but for slightly cheaper than in their room. I like that we are continually inspired by these Star Trek episodes in this area of new business we're trying to construct. This is good.

7:30This is good. This is good stuff and let's see if this episode is good stuff at them. It's season one, episode 22. Symbiosis. Make it sound. Make it sound. Great example of a crew learning about things as they happen that you hope happens all the time on every mission. Captain Picard gets on the PA system and he's like, Hey, we are getting very close to an erupting star and that may result in some unusual things happening on the ship. So buckle up. When we find him on the bridge after we've seen like engineering and stuff hearing his announcement, I love that he's just kind of wandering aimlessly like Picard like me is a phone pacer like if I have to take a long phone call, you're not going to find me in one spot. I'm wandering all over the fucking place and that's Picard's deal. Stay shop everyone.

8:30They got to get really close to this star and it's going to be messy for ship systems. And so like a lot of the conversation is like everybody on the ship can hear this but this is primarily for the benefit of engineering because you guys are going to have to really have your shit together, give us extra shields, extra everything. It hits like an internet service provider sending an email to a customer and go and hey, we're doing some maintenance work in your neighborhood. Just get ready for some disruption. Yeah. Yeah. I have it from disruption to eruption as they start watching the solar flares on this sun that they're scanning. I feel like Riker in particular envies the eruption prowess of this star. The violence of those eruptions is awesome. Fucking dude. Do you think you could go blind looking through the view screen at something like this because there's a moment in this scene where they very clearly put eclipse sunglasses on the

9:32view screen to make it more tolerable? Is that because you could go blind looking at a star through the view screen? I have to imagine that the view screen is a screen and not a window, right? Like it's a window on like new track, right? Like occasionally the glass breaks and somebody blows out through it on new track. But wouldn't you want the highest fidelity visual on the view screen if it's not a window and wouldn't it be at such a high resolution that it could make you blind? I remember being really impressed the first time I watched something that was in HDR on a TV that could do 4K HDR and like it was like a night scene and like a car drove past the cameras and I was like, wow, those headlights are bright like car headlights. Amazing. And that's my head cannon of what this is. Like I think it's like it's uncomfortable relative to the other light in the room. It's not ever going to actually hurt you. Do you remember the last time it hit for you like that?

10:34Because I feel like that's been blown out of my eyes. Like I haven't had a moment like that in a long time watching a television or a movie. It's something I've gotten like in screenings on film. Like I've seen a couple of movies projected on film in the last 12 months. I saw one battle after another and the Odyssey both projected in their preferred formats. And that really hits for me. But yeah, like those first weeks with that TV experience were like, this is changing everything. And now it's like, yeah, what else is new? In the same way that like DVDs and HD just became the norm after a while, you know? Very bright. It goes from very bright to sunglasses bright. And data reports that what they're seeing is indeed unusual. But what's even more unusual is that Wesley Crusher station is all statically and electrocuted. And he backs away before it gets him.

11:36His bit to our application has crashed the system. And he's like, it's probably X-rays from this star, right? Ben, we've seen characters electrocuted before on the show. For many episodes, even. Yeah. You'll look at Wesley Crusher's hairdo, which seems differently styled than it is normally. Why couldn't we give him the hair standing up on end? Electricution scene that he seems to be begging for with the way that his hair is shall act? Do they have an intention as a production of making these electrocutions pretty mild so that the later electrocutions are scarier? Right. It's like that scene in clear and present danger. Like you start low to give yourself a place to go. Like was Wesley Crusher electrocuted? Yeah. I mean, of course he was. Was he electrocuted badly? Certainly. I mean, was he electrocuted to the maximum degree?

12:38Well, yeah. I mean, his hair stuck up. Rocketed across the bridge. Yeah. No where else to go. Full wire jerk. It's stunt, you know. So maybe in season four, we can look forward to some more wirework there with the electrocutions. Tension is mounting among the crew according to emotional bloodhound, Deanna Troy. On the best one of you have a thing. But we've got to get closer and Picard gets back on the one MC to basically tell a ship full of people who are on the left side of the plane that we are flying past the Grand Canyon. It's just north of us. Sorry. But we are getting a splendid view of this phenomenon. If the Grand Canyon was also ejecting plasma into the sky, nobody else can look at this right? Because they don't have the dot on their window, you know? That's a great point. Just then a distress signal. They have to listen to it. But it's from a freighter trying to get help.

13:38They don't have time for this, do they? They're so close to getting, I'm going to guess scientifically significant data from the coronal ejections and so forth. They don't want to leave, right? They don't. But this guy is not close to the star. He is actually an orbit of the fourth planet and trying to broadcast his distress signal to the third planet, strange. And Picard's like, okay. Now anything we can do to help. Yeah, there is some resentment here as Picard orders the ship to change course and intercept this thing to mount a rescue. They don't know anything about this freighter, but it's an old class freighter. Very old. And its orbit is decaying. There is barely any urgency on the enterprise as they approach this ship and ask what kind of assistance they might be able to provide.

14:39It feels a little weird until you get back on the view screen, the very static view screen with the guy on this ship. And he is also not in a hurry. He does not seem super preoccupied with the decaying orbit of his ship. It's a great example of behavioral mirroring, right? Like who's taking hints off of whom? Freight up. We're going to lock on the track to beam and pull you out of orbit. Hey, that's great. You take like a psychology 101 course in college and they tell you like you want to freak people out, get on an elevator and face the back. Like nobody's expecting that and it will make them deeply uncomfortable. But what they're not anticipating is that in one of those back corners, there's a vending machine. I'm seeing the commercial and or the print ad for this thing right now. We got to get it like some in some like hotelier trade rags, like whatever Steve Hilton

15:40reads, you know, on the way into the office. I feel like this could be a premium hotel offering, like a four season style hotel where the stuff is like really nice and good. How about this like a cruise ship where you get your like drink pass that like entitles you to a certain amount of stuff. Like when you're on the website booking your room, there's like a little upgrade you can select for like get five things out of the elevator vending machine every day. Oh, that sounds so good. And you use your key card to blurb it. Why not? Yeah. We have the technology. Hey, we're ready to take meetings about this. Yeah. If you are Steve Hilton or similar, give us a call. I am a future ball. Lockpages are met. I am a future ball. There are four lights. Data has scanned this bad ship and is like, this is so dumb. Like they just need to, you know, bonk the side of the thing. The coil is just a little bit out of alignment.

16:41And they ask like, hey, can you guys just realign that coil? Because that'll do it. They're not so sure that anybody aboard knows how to do this. Like, can you send us like an instruction manual or like a QR code that we can scan for a YouTube video? It's really great to line they walk in this scene about this guy being a captain of his own ship. And the presumption that a captain of his ship knows how his ship operates. And maybe a little bit about how to repair it if it were to break the revelation that this guy's been a captain for seven years. It's especially hard, I think, too. Like, what have you been doing, man, for seven years? You can't even do the basic stuff. Everything about this interaction have prepared them for the pack lids. Yes. Yep. Ben, let's bell curve this out a little bit. Okay, okay. Where would you find the pack lids and where would you find the ornarians on that curve?

17:42On the dumbness, don't know shit curve. Yeah, exactly. I mean, they're definitely like lowest quartile the ornarians. I think that the pack lids are like, you know, single digit percentile. Right, right. I mean, I think the bits are good, right? The ornarian guy goes like, yeah, you know, I aligned the coil in the main shuttle bay a little while ago, but I don't know how to do this one. For some reason, knowing that this thing is going to slip into the atmosphere and explode in, I think it was checked verbally, like less than two minutes. Rikers like, I'll go over there and fix it. What? What? I was starting to get a little charge out of going onto ships that explode moments before he materializes back on the enterprise transport or back. Yeah, I think so too. No, he's not going to do that. Instead, the move is to transport them off the ship. That's a good plan B, isn't it? The issue is like all of the interference that made, track during these guys not work that

18:45is making, talking to them so difficult is also going to affect the transportor. So it's a real transport, as we say, not as we do. Why don't you guys beam over here instead of us beam over there? And they start to get ready for this as the star kicks out even more electromagnetic bursts. And Yara is in the transportor room trying to tie their transportor into the one on the our ship and she's like, beyond annoyed in the way of like a busy barista trying to say the Wi-Fi password a third time to a annoyed customer. Did you say 286 or 886? Mark 2, 68. Got it. It is like that. And Tasha Yara is the barista and the busser and the accountant and all that because she just goes from appearing at tactical to appearing in the transportor room doing this job too.

19:49In my mind, Ben, I think you got to keep Tasha Yara around. She's a character that does so many things. We got to at least keep her on the show for a couple of seasons to find out the whole scope of work she can do. She's like a leatherman multi-tool, you know? Like there are the obvious, plier-based tasks that she is very helpful with but there's so many other things she can do. She can tighten up a loose screw and a light switch panel. She can help you like shred some tinder if you need to start a fire in the bush. Yeah, you know who started a fire in her bush. Up top. It never happened. These guys transport the cargo first, which you never do, you know? This is like a plane soft crashing in an airport and passengers wanting to take their luggage with them. What are you doing? What I was going to compare it to is like in an emergency in a building like a hotel,

20:52you advise not to take the elevator but if there's a vending machine in there, you might want to just to like get a little something to tide you over while you're waiting for the fire department to do their business up there. Because when you're evacuating a hotel, you're not bringing your bag. Maybe you want to get some essentials and the elevator on your way down to the larby. You know what? It's 2 a.m. You're cold. You're in your pajamas on the street in front of all of these other bliery, id hotel guests. Wouldn't a toadlerone hit like a motherfucker right now? I wouldn't know because as you know, Ben, I am an admitted non-hugging. A hotel evacuator. You are. Yeah. You're, you're willing this to evacuate is only matched by my willingness to talk to Jonathan Freak's on an airplane. Yeah. Picard eyes to commercial when we hear about the cargo coming first and when we come

21:53back, he kind of like restates how stupid this is just in different terms and then we energize again and only four of the six occupants of the ship make it out. What a moment. Riker greets with his condolences, these four folks and also brings a little bit of brow beating to bear about, you know, we could have gotten all of you if you didn't do the whole cargo snafu thing with us. The thing about it is you got to clear the pad before you do the next transport. What we had to do is unconnect from your transport transport the cargo down to the cargo hold because I'm not picking that thing up and then reconnect and then be me over. It took a long time. Two guys died and they're like, but where's the cargo? I think we've known a long time that there was a right way to give condolences. In none of those lists of tips, is there a also include your criticisms about the manner

22:54of death and whether or not there were choices that could have been made to maybe change the outcome of that death? Were the deads or narins or brekkians? It seemed like they were or narins, right? But we never told that, don't think. If they were or narins, you're definitely not getting a whiff of, oh, good, more for us that I think once the revelation is made later in the episode, you might have presumed to begin here. In the cargo hold, they go pay a visit to this cargo and the two alien parties get in a great big argument over whether the contract has been completed. The brekkians are like, we gave you the drugs. You didn't give us the goods. The or narins are like, we did give you the goods. It was on that ship that we all had to be out of and we beamed the drugs away because it's ours. If you're maybe watching this in a country whose language is not yours and you're just

23:57looking at this visually and not getting any of the dialogue, you can tell that two of these aliens are wealthy and well off. The other two are sort of tweaky farmer types like down to the overalls made out of searsucker material. Or narin costumes definitely did a lot to inspire the various pores that they encounter in lower decks specifically, I think. Absolutely. Yeah. They don't look as well bathed as the brekkians. Yeah. It's like a real like Ianessir has substandard copper ingots kind of argument that they're having here and it quickly devolves into an electricity fight where the lady very easily overpowers the taller of the two or narins.

24:59But Judson Scott looks like he's on the verge of prevailing when they when you are shoot him. I really wonder when you've got Raiden versus Raiden in a battle like this, what is the thing that makes one's person stronger than the other? Is it that one hasn't had the drug in a while so therefore they're weaker with the electricity? Is it youth slash age? What exactly gives anyone the upper hand? I wonder. How recently one of them has had a bath, might factor into it. Yeah. I also wonder if it's like you know certain video games like you'll have like oh this is like a water powered guy and so he's particularly lethal to electricity powered guys. You're convincing me that this could be a mega man situation here. Good indeed. Hi, this is Mark Bittman from the podcast, Fudu with Mark Bittman.

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28:10acast. That's growtherapy.com slash acast. Growtherapy.com slash acast. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan. They get taken by a security detail up to the observation lounge. We catch up with them later. It's clear that they've just been sitting here arguing with each other for a long time, but we follow Yarn and Riker down a hallway just going like, yeah, man, pretty shitty that they have weapons built into their biology. How do you disarm that? We should reiterate, Ben, because you rightly described how crazy it was that this group

29:11was it's taken to the observation lounge. They got into a fight that had to be broken up with a phaser, and no one got sent to the brig. They should be behind fields, you know? In an episode where they do give voice to the, we can't let these idiots on the bridge. They should be behind fields. Ben, the most ridiculous extra I have ever seen in my life is in this corridor scene starting. Like the sequence is like the camera is a little wide, and it's showing some extras cross back and forth before Tasha and Will Riker round the corner and walk toward the camera. But the moments before Tasha and Riker walk through there is this fucking guy who seems like he's doing an impression of someone walking. It is totally nuts. Sounds like me in every student film I was ever cast in. That's what this guy is doing. It is like he's recovered from a terrible spinal injury and has just gotten up for the first

30:12time and is crossing the frame. It's amazing. You can hear the first day D-Go action background. Wait, no cut, cut. Not like that background. Back to one. And they got this in one. There is no way they did a second take of this. This guy is very distracting. On the bridge, there is a little like, what's up with the people of this system? What do we know about him? And there has been almost no contact with these guys. There was an observation of them 200 years ago in the logbooks, but it doesn't seem like either people have advanced much past what was observed back then. Troy is like, again, like these guys beamed over their stuff first and they are not sad. None of them are sad about the two people that went down in a blaze of glory as the sanction,

31:12which is the name of their ship, burned up in the atmosphere. That's the name of it. No one thinks the question the name of this ship. Interesting. Like sanctioning body, like the Marquess of Queensberry, or are we talking about sanction like Russian oligarch can't access his bank account sanction? It's good to have this moment where it's clear no one knows anything about this culture. So Picard and Reiker and Data go visit these prisoners in the observation lounge and it's clear the Arnareans are desperate to have their two remaining freighters fixed up and operational. This feels life or death to them. Easy to do Picard's happy to do it and tasks some engineers with that project. You must fix our freighters named Punishment and even greater punishment. We do have one that's in dry dock right now. We can't get it off the ground called curb stomp. If you have some extra parts, it would be great to get that one going too.

32:16Punishment and punitive. The names of our remaining freighters. Like all of the great Solomonic Picard moments, he's like, I don't care about your dispute. Solve it amongst yourselves with whatever mechanisms you traditionally would use. And they prevail on him to jump ahead of the queue on that because they're like, this is actually a matter of life or death. We need to get us the medicine that we beamed over because we're hurting, man. First time it's referred to is that and that seems to be something that moves the needle a little bit here. What you got to know about the Felicia medicine is that the Breckians claim that this stuff is very difficult and expensive to cultivate. So they can't just give it away. No matter how badly the Arnareans need it. It's like saffron. There's only like two of them per plant, a little tiny guy. A little goes a long way.

33:17You can make a lot of rice really lovely with just a sprinkle. But again, it's not easy to get. And the payment is all of the stuff we need. And like we sympathize with these guys, they've got this plague. And I love how it kind of washes over Picard and Rankard in the same moment. Like, wait a second. These guys are sick. You and Tuzon carrying this plague. Yes. Oh, shit. Are we going to have to fucking quarantine ourselves in the observation lounge with these assholes? I love the very natural push away from the conference room table that Picard does when this revelation hits as if a few more inches is going to make a difference. And he's pissed. Rightfully so. It sucks to bring a board people who might have a plague. I also just love the dialogue about like, man, yeah, there was a lot of interference when the transport happens. So the medical scanner that is a routine part might not have gone perfect when we did that.

34:24Oh, man. Let's get the doctor up here. It's funny how in dialogue, they call the doctor there, but the very next scene is in six Bay. Six Bay is for scanning and she pronounces both of the Onarians fine and health fine and quotes because the one guy is shivering on the bio bed. The Breckians would like a word with Picard and Crusher tells them to go kick rocks because she has stuff to discuss. And she pulls him into her office where she's like, yes, so they're sick for sure, but not a virus, not a bacterium, not anything I can isolate. They're just sick. And all I can tell you is they're sick and the Breckians are total dicks. We're losing our professional detachment doctor. Perhaps. So Picard goes to talk to the Onarians who are demanding now that the cargo be given to them. And if they aren't given that cargo, they claim that the blood will be on Picard's hands. Dr. Crusher suggests like, well, you could give him a little, right?

35:30There's no harm in that. Picard commits in this moment to, okay, I will talk to the Breckians about maybe giving you a little bit, okay? I'll talk to the Breckians about doing that cool thing where they take out their leather men and drop the knife into the packet and then like take a little rub it on their gums just to see if it's, it's the real shit. I can't feel my face. You know, in the action is also a choice. And Picard is being kind of forced to decide because these guys say that they are on the brink of death. And so he's going to go talk to them and what he finds are two super chilled out Breckians drinking some orange juice and not worrying about a thing in the state rooms that they've been set up with. This is very early check in at the hotel vibes that they've got right here. Oh, look, they even gave us a free fruit tray. Isn't that nice? I didn't even know we had status at this hotel.

36:30Ever since I got that MX Platinum, like when you check into this brand of hotel, they'll let you get one tap from your room key on the elevator vending machine. It's awesome. You can see it, can't you? Now we're weaving it into the loyalty programs available in these places. If you work for Chase Sapphire or MX points get in touch, we want to start to work our way into that system so that your customers can really feel value for their $600 annual credit card. You know what people really love, Ben? People really love lounges. People are really driven crazy by the idea of getting into them and being prevented from going into them. Use it I'm going to sell you on, Ben. What if every elevator becomes a lounge because of the corner vending machine? Well, yeah, man, you're in. There you go.

37:38He's like, hey, so I'm going to give these guys some pills, but I do want to make sure you guys are cool with it because, you know, there's some dispute over whose property the pills are. What do you think? And they're like, well, as a show of good faith, we'll give them each one dose, but we want to be there when you crack the canister open. In the cargo bay, we see the canister cracked open and this philissium is opened up and administered and we see the works being demonstrated here. This is really strong stuff. That's what we learn in this scene. It is highly concentrated. And Dr. Crusher is so close to solving this mystery right here in this moment. There are a lot of questions coming from Crusher as they do all of the little ritualistic pulling out of the lentil and putting it into the tray and describe their incredibly elaborate hydroponic grow-up that they're running.

38:39And they're like, so it just treats the symptoms, but doesn't cure the plague and everyone needs to take this. And data like pipes in with like, I bet you guys are just generally really good at like refinement as a manufacturing process and they're like, nope, this is all we do. Yeah, a single industry, incredible. And this relationship frees up the breakings to do whatever they want. The Arnareans are there to do every single job that's possible to be done on their planet. A real service culture, I think. It is. We get to see the other side of the dose administration in Six Bay while Crusher watches. And I think I never noticed was how detailed the like brass fitting on the end of their little injector was. It's like, this didn't show up in SD. Like they didn't have to go this hard with these props, but they look so good.

39:43They also didn't have to share the needle. You don't like seeing that either. Right in Six Bay, you know? But Crusher does that all the time. She's using the same hypo on a bunch of different people. You're right. You don't have to change the little beak on it at all. You use the same thing. You know what is something that is truly aspirational about the federation depicted in Star Trek the next generation is that they have somehow figured out a way to do away with all of the single use plastic items that are attendant to every medical visit. Just like so much stuff gets thrown away nowadays. But in the future, you can just reuse needles. No problem. You know, Ben, there was a transition period there where patients were feeling pretty uncomfortable with the idea of whatever's on the tray, not being sterilized for your protection. You're telling me that Otiscope has been in someone else's ear and you're not popping the little cone off and putting a new one on.

40:45I mean, there's a very big show of that when you go to the doctor. They show you the new cone. They show you the cone dispenser. I love seeing that cone. You know where else you can get a cone dispenser in an elevator above a vending machine that also sells soft serve Ben. Soft serve ice cream cone. In the elevator. What? Fuck yeah. You know, you can't get that in a room at a at a minibar only in the elevator. Only in the elevator. Well, seeing this is pretty much all she needs to go report to Picard in the ready room. This is drugs. It just drugs. They're just drug dealers and drug users. That's what we're talking about here. Beverly Crusher's like, you remember that vacation we took in the waterfall? And the resort and all that. Remember that stuff you took? How it made you feel? But that was a little blue diamond, not a red circle.

41:48The two tweakers in my six bay looked a lot like that when they were taking the drugs we gave them. On the bridge, right, current data have come up with a little history lesson for Picard. I guess they must have gotten this off the computer on the ornare and ship before it went down or something. Anyways, back in the day, 200 years ago, when Starfleet first encountered these guys, they were like, there's kind of the Lenny species over here, the Breckians. Then there's the ornarens who are like more of a George. Like they got business brains. They're they got schemes and they're they're doing really cool stuff until they got sick. And then suddenly the Lenny's come in with the cure for the plague. And it seems as though what happened is that they cured that thing with the first round of doses. Like, Felicia worked, but it was also profoundly addictive. And the way it's been set up for 200 years is the Breckians sell this to the ornarens

42:53and the ornarens get highest shit and do all of the back breaking labor of producing everything that both species need to live and survive. The formula to a species backstory, I think, is one of the most crucial things to get right when you're breaking a Star Trek story. And I think the detail about the reversal of fortune here between these two species is so important in getting you onto the side of this being so unfair. It's unfair without that detail. It's like fuck, man. Like it's real. Your your society will adapt to service hours, kind of energy, but the way that it went down being so manipulative is the extra bit of business that makes this feel especially awful. And it's so important to include that here. I think you just need to cram this backstory with as much of that as possible.

43:54Because the one to punch is how unfair this seems and how satisfied Picard is that this is something that they cannot touch. We have no jurisdiction here. We cannot influence what's happening in this system. This is the first of many scenes where Picard is just eating a sandwich during an information dump like this and you really wonder why. Like how hungry is he? And like why is he that so messy? I never give you any napkins in this place. What am I supposed to use? Dr. Crusher has an interesting proposition here. She's like we could make full lithium to get them clean, like to get them off of the lentil pipe. But Picard says it is not their role to interfere at all. And that would constitute an interference that they can't do. That would be imposing our values on their lifestyle. Hands are tied now. You shut me down. Well in this case, Captain, I disagree. 100%.

44:55Isn't Dr. Crusher stronger about her pushback here than in any other moment on the show? She and does it publicly. She is very upset with Picard like through the rest of the episode. Bavalar, save it full of the ready room. They get another phone call. This one is from a leader on the Arnorn planet who is just as strung out as the other Ornorns we've met. Really wants to know where his guys are with their drugs. And they're like, yeah, yeah, we're working it out. You can probably see them pretty soon. This is the moment where it's clear they don't want these folks on the bridge at all. So they're like, yeah, we'll take this call over in the Arnorn guest quarters. Maybe if you guys had taken some baths, you know, we could have you on the bridge, but yeah, kind of trying to keep up appearances around here. When Picard and Riker and Data leave, there's this side conversation. This is the after school special moment where Wesley has this very innocent question about

45:55drugs. And from Tasha Yars reaction, Ben, you can tell that there was a time. Oh, there was a time when Tasha Yark would party. She partied so hard because the amount she knows about drugs feels hard earned, doesn't it? It does. What Denise Krasby pours into her performance of these lines is like, boy, oh boy, can drugs make you feel good. And I know as the adult in the room that I have to say the escape it provides from poverty and deprivation is not real, but honestly, like even if you're not impoverished, like kid, everything in moderation, let's just say. Even data has to cringe at the end of this scene. They don't have to whip Pan down to him, but like you can see over his shoulder, he looks back up and he's like, what the fuck was that about?

46:56I mean, I think this is so interesting in the context of, you know, the Reagan drug wars that it comes out in like this scene is the one part that really feels like just say no. But the rest of the episode is about systems and oh, yeah, like we, we prosecute Felicia and crimes with 10 times as much punishment as other kinds of drugs because it's more likely that Ornars will do it and stuff like that. It really feels like it is an episode that is smarter than this scene. When we cut over to the Arnare and guest quarters, we pick up that FaceTime with Morgan on screen again, where he reiterates how desperate he is to get that Felicia. But when the FaceTime ends, Picard apologizes to Dijon here as if maybe there was a scene that we didn't get, like did he die on camera and maybe that part was edited out?

47:58I don't know what Picard's apologizing for. Or my hands are tied. I can't get involved and you guys are going to have to do some kind of legalistic process between your peoples to resolve where this medicine is going to go. And Dijon cannot afford to wait. So he takes Riker hostage and is screaming all kinds of crazy shit about how he wants a jet and he wants Riker to get some pizza that just need that medicine, man. I think once you've put Jonathan Frakes in a stasis field in the Echo Papa episode, I think you're just itching to get him into a condition like that again. And when Dijon puts his electric hands onto him, he does get kind of contorted into that facial expression, right? I love it. He's so good. Yeah. Picard's not going to negotiate with terrorists though. That's because he knows Dijon is not a killer.

48:59It is a hell of a gamble with Riker's life on the line, isn't it? He really plays some poker with this guy. Is this why no one wants to play poker with Picard until the series finale? They're like, that guy is going to win every time. They're like, you were always welcome. I mean, to the ones we told you about, they like tell them about all the poker games that are like when they know he has other shit that he has to do. That's the right way to do it. So Riker is recovering from this. He's gotten his guts rearranged a little bit, but he's going to be fine. Lengor and Sobi, the Breckians, won a word with Picard. And they're like, hey, good news. We've made a very magnanimous decision. We're going to front them the brick and then they can pay us back later. Picard sees this for exactly what it is. They don't want to lose their only customers. They realize that if the Ornarens detox on mass, their entire population goes through

50:00the process and comes out the other side realizing that they were just addicted and not actually being cured of some disease that was endemic to their population, the Breckians are going to have no business model anymore. Yeah. What they need to do is allow the narcotic to do narcotic things the way it's been doing for thousands of years. Am I calling it a brick? Are you calling the entire cargo of the Felicium, that brick? Are there three bricks? It seems to be a lot of canisters in that, right? It seems like there is a colon below amount of concentration here to the Felicium. I have in my head an amount of drug use that a brick can provide for, but we're hearing one dose of Felicium and multiplied by how many doses are in these tubes could be administered to millions of people, right? I would estimate 4,375 million.

51:00Thank you, Mr. Dayton. This is like that time I went into a dispensary and thought I was buying two milligram mints in a little tin and one. I had actually purchased were 20 milligram mints in a little tin, but they're smaller than an Advil. The little guys, so like you can't really cut them up. You can't do anything with them because it's just so concentrated, so powerful, you're fucked. If you take one of them, you're just off on another planet. It's what made that run of live shows so unusual back in the day. So Picard is going to allow them to do this. You can go ahead and give it to them on a payment plan. Make sure that they set up Klarna on their phone before you give them the Felicium, but they can take it with them and then pay you later. Ben, this isn't part of the game, but I do want to play a quick game with you. How would Captain Picard pronounce the word Klarna?

52:04Klarna? I can't even get the first syllable out. I have to affirm that we call it Klarna. Klarna. Klarna. Oh, man, is Beverly Crusher pissed off that he's prime directiving all of these drugs to this society that is clearly suffering from an addiction disorder. What are you thinking, Picard? I told you about the Felicium idea. There's the energy of her umbridge with Picard in this scene that is happening opposite the joy that Langer seems to take in recognizing that Picard's hands are tied and he's been eating the sandwich all along. Like absent her smile, I think this scene hits far differently, but she is loving this in a way that is so gross. Yeah, the the break ins are so brilliantly played by Kimberly Far and Judson Scott as

53:07like just hateable assholes and hateable assholes whose entire position you totally understand. It's like they are willing to do morally compromised things because it is the way their society gets to exist and that's like a total kind of person, you know. It is a fair exchange. Interesting relationship. The fun of it is that Picard has thought through all of the prime directiv ramifications of the adventure because when he goes down to the cargo bay, he's like, good news. We cut a deal with the Breckians and you can take your drugs. You just have to make sure you select a payment plan and I would do one, you know, on the shorter term because you'll pay less interest over time. So they're like working on getting their APR figured out and they're like, okay, yeah, just load the drugs and all the parts that we ordered up on the transporter pad and he's like, not so fast. That would also be interfering in the development of a primitive culture.

54:13Because the real gift Picard is giving the Ornareans is self-sufficiency and that seems absurd to both parties. I love how they both hate this. Breckians are just as outraged as the Ornareans when it is revealed that the Ornareans are going to have to figure out how to maintain spaceships, a task that nobody believes that they are up to. I love the detail from earlier that carries forward into this moment because we also know that the Breckians can't do it either. They're a one industry society. Remember, they're the Lenys. They're Lenys in shiny silver costumes. They're rich Lenys. The thing that I love most about this episode is how little stresses on Picard's face when he has broken all of this news to them and then Beverly speaks up because he is not worried at all that she's going to give up the game. Like the truth of the, you are just addicted to something and you need to like break your

55:16addiction is not the way she puts it. You must trust yourselves. There are other options. She does not reveal the deception that the Breckians have been engaged in. She completely gets with his prime directive argument just by watching what he does and he has no concerns that she will blow this for him. We will not transport the cargo ship parts, but we will transport a billion cold turkeys down with you. I would estimate 4,375 million. Thank you, Mr. Data. Enjoy. They're doomed to planetary detox and after they beam out, like Picard and Crusher are on the elevator and she's like, I understand why you did what you did, but it seems so cruel. And he comes back with his argument that there may be a very painful moment in the not too distant future for the Ornarens, but I don't know that skipping over that part would

56:20do them any favors in the long run. And the prime directive is a philosophy that tells us that we will never be able to do the math on that kind of thing. And so we shouldn't even try. He makes such an elegant argument on behalf of the prime directive and in terms where you see why it doesn't click together cleanly with the Hippocratic oath, which is like very much the unspoken standpoint that Crusher has been arguing from. These two things don't work together in this moment, but the prime directive has to come first in Picard's mind. And it just so happens to connect to his idea that suffering is an incredible teacher. Like I think that goes on said in this moment, but I think it is where he is coming at it from. Like you're not going to learn not to touch the stove until you touch the stove. And then you know not to do it again.

57:21So the gets to the bridge and they're like, let's get out of this part of town. Pretty cutty, not really into the vibes around here. Jordy, you pick the next stop and Jordy like gets out the the atlas and he's like, well, I've actually never gotten to try in and out. And there's one like off the highway, like a couple of stops ahead of here. What do you guys say we go get lunch? Oh, Jordy free, strange role credits. I got a big question for you. This episode is about addiction and I feel like that word gets thrown around a lot mostly misused and exaggerated and kind of confused for things that we just like to do a lot or want to do really bad. But addictions are behaviors that result in an immediate psychological reward and a

58:25ton of negative consequences associated with that behavior. So I'm going to go out on a limb and say neither of us are addicts. But we do have patterns of behavior that we tend to or I think we all do. So I'm not talking about addiction here when I ask this, but I am curious about this. What do you think is your hardest pattern to break and how do you approach working through that you think? I think that the hardest pattern for me is the like the little hater inside my head, like the thing that is constantly making me feel guilty or undeserving of good things. I think that that is like a very deep neurological groove carved over many, many years. And one that I have come to recognize as a deeply maladaptive mental process that I am

59:28working really hard right now on ridding myself of. And it's a bit like a detox. Like it is really, really hard to go through a day and like remember to identify those thoughts when they come up as not real and not like the way I can or should think about myself given like the reality that I live in. And like addiction, it is not entirely my fault that that is the thing that I struggle with. You know, like the the thing that I think is most amazing about this episode given the time and place it was made is it casts no moral aspersions on the ornars. The ornars are not people who made big mistakes and like deserve a shitty existence in a way that like so, so, so much of the media of the 80s about drugs was like these are like these are bad people

1:00:32on the wrong side of the law. And they're like they don't care who they'll run over to get their fix. You know, like I think it's a very compassionate episode in that way and it really is. Compassion is like like self compassion. I think it's the core of how you get out of those bad patterns and compassion for people who are struggling to overcome those kinds of things I think also helps a ton. So I really appreciate this episode for the way it thinks about those things and doesn't kind of fall into the tropes and traps of its era. Yeah, good stuff. Well, Adam, you know, it's always good and I don't I don't care who knows it. I'm fucking hooked on priority one messages. I'm trying to get off priority one messages, but it's so hard. Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel.

1:01:36Yes, extra. The interest alone could be enough to buy this ship. Can't go cold turkey from promotional priority one messages, especially Ben. This one goes like this. Cosmic Lion Productions is an independent publishing company based in LA. Our comics are carried in all the finest comic and book shops Galaxy Wide. From sci fi to manga, beat them up to slice of life. CLP has comics of every kind for every mind. We travel from Alpha to Delta Quadrants doing Comic-Cons and we may be at a station near you. This September 26th in Providence, Rhode Island will be at Indie Comics creators con. All FODs get 50% off. Just let us know in the most embarrassing way you can think of. So here's the call to action. Go to CosmicLionProductions.com. That is spelled like the word Cosmic, the word Lion, and the word Productions.

1:02:39Thanks Eli. We actually got to meet Eli. Random Happened Sans was at the same table read of a Star Trek episode that we went to a couple of weeks ago as this airs. And he was a really friendly guy. He said to look out for an upcoming priority one message and here it is. There it sits. I was thinking that about Eli at that event. Yeah, there he sits in the row ahead of us. This sounds great. I know that there are a lot of Northeast FODs that would probably love to go to a Comic-Con Providence Rhode Island. What a what a town. Go join the Mafia and get some great comic books from Eli at CosmicLion's production.com. Here's a personal one from Nady D to Ben and Adam. Goes like this. I was at our local FEMDOM dungeon last night preparing to scene with my beloved husband. A friend was unpacking her paddling slash flogging slash spanking implements from a hard case R2D2 suit case.

1:03:45We call it R2BQ in preparation of playing with her partner. My husband blurted out, she listens to the same Star Trek podcast all day and has a complete parasocial relationship with the hosts. How could you understand that with a ball gag in his mouth? Yeah, did it just sound like... I am a true friend of Dissoto. I am not on the discord at all because I am old and lazy, but I wanted to drop a line to thank you both bringing me so much joy. Is my husband jealous of the relationship I have with two guys who should never be a baris by sharing their unfettered affection for something we all love? Best wishes to the whole crew, founding member NadyD. I think we have presumed for a long time that like many, many FODs socialize in the many places that they gather online. It is good to remember that there are many,

1:04:50maybe even many more FODs who don't. They're just out there in sex dungeons. They're not on the discord. Yeah, and I think that the thing that is most aspirational to me about what NadyD has told us about here today is that for some people humiliation is highly linked to what they do in asexual context. And in this case, our show is not that for her or her husband. Gotta say, I'm a little bit disappointed that it's not a part of it. That it's not a part of it. It could be, you know, but I think it would maybe go the other way. Like you're maybe too humiliating, Ben. Maybe maybe NadyD could do some stuff about how maybe ban an atom like better, smarter, funnier than the little piss picker, whatever she calls. You know what? I'm not going to guess. I'm not going to guess.

1:05:51Just incredible to think about, Ben. Listen, Zari NadyD, I didn't mean to imply anything specific, but I'm just glad that that our show doesn't embarrass you. I hope there are enough gaps in our dialogue for the slapping of the buttocks to fit in every once in a while. Yeah. Every so often the mask slips down over the ball gag and the husband notices like, why is why does NadyD have one air pot in? Ben, our final priority in message is to future Clayton. That's from past Clayton. And this one has been requested of me specifically to read in the Mark Twain voice. A Mark Twain voice, I have said on past episodes, past recent episodes. I no longer remember how to do. But we will try with this message here from Clayton. Now I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart, but you've got being right

1:06:52down to an ox. Uh, you think you're a genius, you drive me up the wall. You're a regular original know it all. Oh, oh, you think you're special. Oh, oh, you think you're something else. Okay. So you're a rocket scientist. That don't impress me much. So you got the brains, but have you got the touch? Now don't get me wrong. I think you're right, but that will keep me warm in the middle of the night. That don't impress me much. Happy birthday future Clayton. I hope you're not single. Well, if future Clayton was coupled up before that may all come crashing down if the lucky other person in that relationship hears about this. I must admit that this is the first time I've ever had to confront the idea that Chennai a Twain may be related to Mark Twain.

1:07:56And I'm not ready to know the answer to that question. I don't know if anyone is. You know what, Adam? I hope never the Twain shall meet. And I hope all the folks listening are inspired by the various messages in the inbox today to send a P1 of their own. You can do it by going to podchop.biz and clicking priority one message at the top of the page really helps us cover the cost of making all this bullshit. Thanks, it's done. Ben, we have just enough time to play a little game. A game inspired by Felicia. The cause of and solution to all of the problems between the Onarians and the Breckians. And when I saw all those red lentils and those containers, I just knew I had to ask you three questions related to the lowly legume. A small but mighty power packed protein that punches well above its weight. But will you be able to open a

1:08:57can of whoop ass on my three trivia questions in a game I'm calling Bean or Bean No? All you have to do is answer two out of three over under style questions correctly to win. Fail to do that and you lose. And if you lose your consequence will be to recreate one of our most popular drops using only fart sounds that you record yourself. You'll be using your mouth and your hands. These are not real farts, Ben, because that would be gross. The assignment of which drop will be made by our producer Wendy. And this will play in the Marin of our very next episode for all to hear. Are you ready? Uh, Reddy is now ever be Adam. You're such a doll. Question one is about red lentils, Ben. And speaking of red lentil production, Canada are trading partner to the Norse.

1:09:58You know, that might not be funny by the time this comes out, but at the moment, I'm using. They produce approximately what percentage of the world's lentil supply is it over or under 40%. Big big country. Big country big number. Big country big number. Great trading partner. I think I could be forgiven for wondering if India just outstrips everyone in this particular agricultural stat. But I am also thinking that it might not be remarkable enough to even bring up what Canada's production was, unless it was pretty impressive. So I'm going to guess the over. Ben, you are correct. Wow. Canada produces approximately 45% of global lentil production. Isn't that amazing? Pretty good. Pretty good.

1:11:01Question two. Chickpeas are one of the most widely cultivated legumes worldwide. In a single year, global chickpea production totals approximately how many million metric tons? Is it over or under 20 million metric tons? What I'm thinking here is there are so many mouths to feed in the world and so much hummus to be manufactured. And whenever you hear about how much beef is consumed or whatever, it's kind of an unthinkable number. I don't really have a sense about what 20 million metric tons looks like. We're talking about filling the nose bowl with chickpeas. Yeah. Is this the dry weight or are we talking about cans? You know, it's as the aluminum count. What's that bean liquid in there? Questions on top of questions. You're talking about aquafaba. Yeah, for, you know, it's like an egg white substitute in vegan baking.

1:12:05I'm going to guess the over. Ben, you are... Roar! Global annual chickpea production is approximately 16 to 17 million metric tons. This final question, Ben, is for all the marbles you're ready. And it's about my personal favorite bean, the black bean. Black beans are packed with nutrition. Dry black beans contain approximately how many grams of fiber per 100 grams. Is it over or under 15 grams per 100 grams of beans? This fiber, not enough of it in the American diet. Black beans enough to make up for the deficit. Will you be making a fart drop based on your answer to this question? Guess we can have to ask ourselves are beans? In fact, the musical fruit. And I'm going to say they are.

1:13:07I'm going to say that these guys have the over again. Ben, you are correct! Dry black beans contain approximately 15 to 16 grams of fiber per 100 grams, which means you have one bean or bean, which means FODs are deprived of an alternate version of a hit drop made using only fart sounds. I will keep this punishment in my back pocket to deploy it another time. I personally think it could be a fun one. I mean, it sounds gross as hell, but you know, that's how you like to get your yayas. I guess you can keep it in your back pocket. I mean, Weird Al Yankovic has earned millions of dollars on this very same concept, so me and him couldn't possibly be wrong. All right Adam, well, that was a ton of fun, but we got to go. We got to wrap this episode up. Here is our producer to tell you all about what's coming up next week

1:14:11on the show along with our credits. Bye bye! The greatest generation is an expert Shimoda podcast. It's hosted by Ben Harrison and Adam Puranika, and it's produced and edited by Wendy Pretty. Next week we'll be back with another episode of Star Trek the Next Generation, so make sure your post-eth hologram recording is updated because it's season one episode 23, Skin of Evil. Until we get there, we want to say thank you to all the members who support this show. If you want to join them, you'll get an ad free fee plus a lot of great bonus episodes and other benefits. Sign up at greatesttrek.com or just click the support link in the show notes right there in your pod catcher and thank you for your support. Music for the greatest generation is by Dark Materia. Social media is managed by the great Bill Tilly and the wonderful Rob Adler. Rob also puts together the greatest newsletter every month. Visit podshop.biz to sign up for that. You can also book a P1 there or find yourself some fun merch and all of that helps support the show too, so thanks. Follow our official social media pages on Instagram, Blue Sky, and YouTube and use the hashtag

1:15:12Greatest Gen when you post about the show. And don't forget to subscribe to Greatest Trek if you're not already because we're coming up to the Undestrange New World season four and the guys have had so much to say about it. But that's all for now. We'll see you next week on the Greatest Generation. You're a big car. Oxbridge. Shamaria. During lows pro savings days save more on the products you count on to get the job done right. Get a free two pack of DeWalt 20 volt max XR 8 amp hour batteries when you buy a

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