
About this episode
Every mother needs to hear this conversation. It just doesn’t make sense that we put so much undue pressure on ourselves and are quick to criticize and judge other moms for their parenting styles. I’m joined today by Erica Djossa, the author of Releasing the Mother Load: How to Carry Less and Enjoy Motherhood More. We are talking about all things motherhood and expectations, why I’ve been blasted over a couple of recent TikToks, and Erica’s parenting wisdom from her book. Join us to learn more!
Show Highlights:
● One of KC’s videos about how she “doesn’t play” with her kids—and the flurry of negative responses over parenting choices
● The intensive mothering ideation: motherhood equals martyrdom, mothers must put everyone else’s needs about their own, shelve all their interests, and be self-sacrificial in every way
● The second of KC’s videos about sending her dog away from home for training—and the flurry of anger and shame over her inadequacies as a dog owner
● Mainstay pillars of the intensive mothering ideology and the BS that is promoted as healthy attachment and “good mothering”
● Giving less can sometimes mean giving more.
● The truth that shows up in the bedtime routine (“Are you holding space for yourself, mom?”)
● The scope, dynamic, and importance of “independent play,” creativity, and solving problems
● Healthy attachment: safety, security, reliability, and dependability
● The space for moms to have unique and different personalities and mothering styles, like bedroom parents vs. living room parents
● Projecting our mother wounds on other moms (Why do we do it?)
● Understanding why not all NOs are equal
● The disparity in expectations and judgment for moms and dads
● Motherhood expectations, boundaries, and the stories we tell ourselves
Resources and Links:
Connect with Erica Djossa: Website, Instagram, Momwell Podcast, and Releasing the Mother Load book
Mentioned by Erica: Needy by Mara Glatzel
Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook
Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Get every episode summarized
Each time Struggle Care publishes, we email you a written briefing from the transcript — the topics, who appeared, and any specific claims, with the ad reads skipped.
Email me new episodesFree for 3 shows. No card needed.
Hosts & guests
No transcript yet
This episode has not been transcribed. Request it and it moves to the front of the queue.
More episodes
More from Struggle Care

142: Best of: Codependency Doesn’t Exist with Shahem McLaurin
Struggle Care
May 26, 202545:16pending

141: Best of: Boundary stories pt 1: The dad I didn't cut off
Struggle Care
May 19, 202528:29pending

140: Camp For All: How Inclusive Camp Changes Lives
Struggle Care
May 5, 202537:30pending

139: Pausing Your Career to Stay at Home (A Resource for Women Who Aren't Tradwi...
Struggle Care
Apr 21, 202545:41pending