
394. What is the pursuer-distancer relationship dynamic?
About this episode
When one person tries to get closer to someone else, and the other person pulls away in response, they might be experiencing a pursuer-distancer dynamic. This can create a very painful cycle, where communication breaks down, each side blames the other, and ultimately, nobody has their needs met. In this episode, we explore the stages of a pursuer-distancer cycle, unpack why we’re drawn to relationships like this, and learn how to break the cycle so we can enjoy more happy, fulfilled relationships.
We explore:
- What the pursuer-distancer dynamic looks like
- The psychology of why romantic opposites ‘attract’
- What’s going on in the mind or a pursuer and distancer
- Pursuer-distancer burnout - and when the pursuer final quits...
- How we can heal a pursuer-distancer cycle
- Can pursuer-distancer dynamics work in our 20s?
A note that this episode contains content about abusive relationships.
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