29. Backdraft: When Being Good to Yourself Feels Bad

In this episode, Aimee is talking about an interesting obstacle to self-compassion: Backdraft. Just to note, this isn't about the 1991 movie, Backdraft (though who doesn't love a De Niro flick?!). Instead, we're talking about a fire science term that psychology also uses to describe a pretty uncomfortable feeling that can arise when we open ourselves up and let in some self-compassion. Listen in for how this phenomenon takes shape and three tips to ease it so you can continue practicing this essential element of self-compassion. 

 

Key Takeaways (see full transcript below):

• Love reveals anything unlike itself... the brain is wired to present all the ways we haven't been compassionate.
• We have been trained to be hard on ourselves. That means it's logical if backdraft is coming up for you. The only antidote is self-compassion. 
• Note that if you're experiencing a lot of backdraft, it is important to get support from a practitioner or trusted individual who can help you through. 
• Three tips to consider to help ease backdraft: 
  • Stop, then yield.
  • Feel it to heal it. 
  • Name it to tame it.

Links Mentioned:

• Joy Lab Program (go deeper with everything you learn from the podcast)
• Joy Lab podcast episode 7 (You're Wired for Compassion)
• Joy Lab podcast episode 26 (Self-Compassion: Don't Believe Everything You Think [about yourself])
• Joy Lab podcast episode 27 (Self-Compassion: Easing Up On Yourself )
• Joy Lab podcast episode 28 (Self-Compassion: Remembering You're Not Alone)
• Mindful Self-Compassion Program

Full transcript available at: https://www.naturalmentalhealth.com/podcasts/joy-lab-podcast/episodes/2147804502