070 - "Don't Shoot Yourself with The Second Arrow"

"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." You've probably heard that one. It's not the most useful phrase. There are a lot of really difficult or tragic situations where your pain is going to be accompanied by some suffering. However, the intellectual idea behind that phrase is sound: we can, in moments of more lower-case p pain, pile on all sorts of mental anguish and worry to an already painful situation. Where possible, you want to try to avoid compounding that necessary pain with unnecessary suffering. Today, we've got a tool—"The Second Arrow of Suffering"—that will help you do that, and explain how to use it in a way that's a bit more nuanced than simply saying, "Don't suffer."

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