You Matter — A conversation with Cami Kaos — E17

Bio
Chaos wrangler, community builder, storyteller, turning burnout into wisdom and neurodivergence into gold. One eye on justice, one hand on the mic, the other holding a gluten-free snack. Portland forever. @camikaos

Summary
Matthew interviews Cami Kaos, exploring themes of neurodiversity, childhood experiences, and the challenges faced by individuals with ADHD and Autism. They discuss coping mechanisms, the impact of diagnosis on relationships, and the importance of advocacy in tech. The dialogue also delves into the nuances of calling in versus calling out in social interactions, emphasizing the need for understanding and allyship in professional spaces. In this conversation, Cami Kaos and Matthew explore various themes surrounding communication challenges, burnout, the complexities of autism, social interactions, and the role of empathy in both personal and professional contexts. Cami shares her experiences with burnout and autistic burnout, emphasizing the importance of understanding and respecting personal boundaries in social situations. They discuss the impact of alcohol as a social lubricant and the perceived versus actual value of empathy in business. The conversation also touches on leadership dynamics, self-worth, and aspirations for the future, culminating in a reflection on the weight of unemployment and the desire for personal growth.

​Takeaways
Childhood experiences shape adult coping mechanisms.
Diagnosis can provide clarity and understanding of oneself.
Advocacy in tech is crucial for neurodiverse individuals.
The importance of calling in rather than calling out.
Coping strategies can include routines and medication.
Navigating systems can be challenging for neurodiverse individuals.
Personal growth often involves reflecting on past relationships.
The tech industry is often designed by neurotypical individuals.
Understanding and empathy are key in professional interactions. Cami emphasizes the importance of clear communication in professional settings.
Burnout can manifest in various forms, including autistic burnout.
Understanding autism involves recognizing the complexities of masking and social interactions.
Setting personal boundaries is crucial for mental health and wellbeing.
Alcohol often serves as a social lubricant, but its role can be problematic.
Empathy is a vital component of successful business practices.
Leadership often comes with the challenge of lacking authority to make necessary changes.
Self-worth is tied to the ability to prioritize one's own wellbeing.
Social interactions can be exhausting for those with autism, leading to the need for personal space.
Future aspirations include overcoming the weight of unemployment.

Chapters
00:00​ Open, No Cold
05:27​ Coping Mechanisms and Self-Discovery
24:26​ Surviving In Tech, Neurospicy-style
30:12​ The Importance of Perspectives
34:43​ Calling In vs. Calling Out
43:03​ Burnout and Its Implications
01:03:59​ Authenticity and Adaptability in Work
01:15:22​ 7 +/- 2 Questions
01:15:38​ What is something that went really well for you recently?
01:16:25​ What do you wish people cared more about?
01:16:41​ What's your go-to dish?
01:21:22​ What is the business value of empathy?
01:22:27​ Waving at flaggers, yes or no?
01:24:26​ What do you hope to not be carrying anymore?

​Keywords
podcast, neurodiversity, ADHD, Autism, coping mechanisms, childhood experiences, advocacy, calling in, calling out, personal growth, communication, burnout, autism, social interactions, empathy, leadership, personal boundaries, alcohol, self-worth, wellbeing