X Minus One - Shanghaied

0:00Countdown for blast off. X minus 5, 4, 3, 2, X minus 1, fire. From the far horizons of the unknown come transcribed tales of new dimensions in time and space. These are stories of the future, adventures in which you'll live in a million could be years on a thousand maybe worlds. The national broadcasting company in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of astounding science fiction presents. X minus 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1.

1:10The night story, Shanghai. Okay, okay, very funny, very funny. You can overboy tomorrow the old ball and chain. You drink and be merry for tomorrow you commit matrimony. Oh, come on, we came down here to Scully Square to have a little fun. We might as well be at my mother's musical and beaconscrut. All the problems of the rich. And tell me to have just where does the coffin fortune come from? Pirate treasure? No, I guess it started in the end, tuck it. My great, great something or other used to be a whaler. Oh whaler, that's he blows. Dead well or a stoveboat. Watch my trusty harpoon. Hey, hey, hey, hey, look out with the port. Oh my. Where's the money now? Oh, I don't know. We've got a lot of commercial holdings, mills, import, export outfits, rocket lines, you know. Meir trivia. I don't, I don't we get out of this dump. We go up to the coply plazet, maybe stuffy, but at least the glasses are clean. Well, you're all the condemned men. All right, you two go ahead and get in the car, I'll settle.

2:11All right, me, Chuck. Right. Excuse me. You want something but? Yeah, the check. Okay, okay. Hey, move, check. It'll be right out. Right, thank you. That, all right? Nice night, eh? Oh, yeah, I suppose so. I've been watching you. Celebrating? Sort of. Hey, sell them, I. Just got off a deep space run out to Centauris. Oh, that's a 15-year run, isn't it? 15 and three blooming months. Mm-hmm. Well, hold you now. You a space man? No, no, not exactly. Uh, where's that check barkeep? I got it, your hat barred. Nothing's slow, but he sure. Yeah, fill it up, Charlie. Say, why don't you join me, matey? Yeah, Charlie? Oh, no, no, no, thank you. Come on, we'll take off him. Well, celebrate whatever it is you're celebrating on me. Porry, Charlie. All right, all right, thank you, I guess I might as well. Yeah. Cheers? Yeah, all right, cheers. Oh, what's that, Martin? Charlie's station bread, hey, Charlie?

3:12Yeah. Well, oh, say, look, Charlie, would you get that waiter out here? I've got a meter. I, uh... You watch your area, matey. You got plenty of time. Sure. Sit down, man. Hey, get lazy. You don't look so good. Oh, no, I don't feel so good. Yeah, no, sit right here. You feel chipper as a blooming grasshopper in a sec. No, I've got to get outside, because cars... In a hurry, I've got to... Where's the check? Check. Oh. Oh. All right, my feet. Up on your feet, wakey, wakey, wakey. Oh, all right, let go of me. What's the idea? Rise and shine and greet the dawn.

4:14What? Where am I? What's going on here? Come on, now, matey, up in there. Wakey, wakey, wakey. Wait a minute. So you were at that bar, the Scully Square. Come on, now, that barn decor you'll be in trouble. Deck? What are you talking about? Where am I? And it's hard to say, exactly. All friend of Adidas out of Atlantic Spiceport. Atlantic Spiceport? Well, look what kind of a joke is this. If Alan and Peter think this is funny, what... What ship is this? RS Michael M. Rafferty, coffin line. Oh, coffin line. Well, that makes it easy. Now you've got to put back the port. Hey, forget your toothbrush bank. No, no, listen, you runchie take me to the captain's house. Hey, hey, hey, I'll take over check if all right. Get moving. Sure, sure, matey. I'll take you to the captain. Bet you're going to be sorry. Morton, what the devil are you doing on the bridge? Get below before I try. Only this year, Kent have been asked to see you.

5:15That's right, captain. There's been a mistake, mate. I'm afraid it was supposed to be a joke. Oh? Yes, you see? I'm going to be married today, and I suppose the boys thought it'd be funny to make me miss the ceremony. I'm sure it won't be too much trouble to have you drop me off back at the Atlantic Spiceport. What? Morton, what is it? We're simple, Captain. He wants to tell the shipper, and that's all. Now, look, if there's any trouble with your superior, I'm sure I can fix it up. You see, I'm Jeff Coffin. Yeah? Well, you don't understand. My father is Cyrus Coffin. He owns this ship. Oh, he does, eh? Morton, get this drunk, hello. Now, just a minute, I can understand you're not believing me, but I can identify my... I think where's my wallet? I've been robbed. I'm not going to be a cop. I think where's my wallet? I've been robbed. When I look at Captain, wait a minute. All you have to do is radio back and check. Mr. Black, remove this man from the bridge. Yes, but I said, you're the Captain Buster. Oh, wait a minute. Like all of me, this is no way to treat a passenger.

6:15Passing, Jeff? Huh. Wake up, sunny boy. You're one of the crew. Now, get below. All right, now, mate. Grab yourself a buffer, get the work of this deck, mate. They can't get away with this. This is kidnapping. Perhaps, yes, perhaps, now. I'll get this here, deck nice and shiny, we might even see a bad sun, grab. I'll be back in two hours. And mind you, I want to be able to see me blooming reflection in it. Got to polish that deck, mate. I can't get away with this. Oh, Lord says, once you sign on, you're under absolute orders. Yeah, but I didn't sign on, I was kidnapped. You won't be able to prove it. Come on, Mr. Pleas, I didn't get anything to eat yet today, so give me a break, huh? Oh, all right. What do you do, run the buffer over it? Yeah, that's right. Like this. You sign on?

7:15Yeah, I run away from home. How old are you? Sixteen. Thirty, when we get back. Yeah. What do you mean, thirty? We're headed for Mars, aren't we? Home in a refuel. We're outbound to Santoris. Oh, no, it can't be. Well, that's a fifteen-year run. Morton! I've got to get back. How use? I'm getting married. I'm trying to be, you'll think I'm dead. Morton! Morton! I want to see you. You want me to call Mr. Blackagrain? You'll give you one more. Listen to me, Morton. Listen, I've got to get back to Earth. I can't disappear for fifteen years. Ah, is that the fact? Look, we stop at Mars, right? Yes, and you'll be below decks and the lock and case. Listen to me, if I can make it worth your while, will you get me off at Marsport? Jump and shiver. That's real naughty, mate. One thousand dollars. Why, what would I tell me poor old mother in Tennessee? Two thousand. Five. An advance. What do you mean an advance? You're probably the one who rolled me for my wallet. I'll find a way. They don't believe you're young coffin, but maybe on better?

8:17All right, it's a deal. Look, Mr. Coughen, can you take me with you? I didn't realize what it would be like. I can pay my share. I could work it out for you, or maybe borrow money. I couldn't stand fifteen years. I'd go crazy. All right, all right, sure. What about a morning? Boyle costs another thousand. Who cheap swindler? An amrster, Coughen. I'm all what stands between you and a lovely pleasure cruise for fifteen years. So I'll thank you that treat me with a respect and politeness what a gentleman like myself deserves. Oh, baby. Oh, baby. Oh, baby. Stand by. Stand by for landing procedure. All right, now. Listen carefully. This is the cable locker for the grappling anchor. Right. When she lands this actual open, cables go out.

9:18Don't get yourself caught in them. You'll be tore apart. All right, we've got the... You know, you just do what I say. We drop down to the last bit. Nobody'll be there. I low in the pit till dark. Got that? Right. Now look, Martin, I'll tell the patrol you helped us get away. That'll help you when they catch up with us. You may have thanked yourself. Thank you kindly. I've got to get to my station now. Thanks. Thanks, Mr. Martin. Well, as a landing point, I'll keep clear that cable, Joey. Here we go. Hold on tight. It goes a grappling cable. Yeah. All right, come on. Drop through the hatch. It's about six feet. All right, it's clear. Hurry up. Here I come. You all right? Yes, it was to my anchor. Sorry. All right, there's the blast, pit. Get going.

10:18Now we're all right so far. The ship hides us. Here's the pit. All right, now get down so they can't see you. Wait a minute. I hear somebody coming. Keep still. Make way better. Look, if we stick our heads up over the edge, they'll say a short. Now, keep down and keep still. I hear you. Well, well, well. Look what we have here. Two little babes in the wood. Now you two are moving, I'll shoot you in the belly. Morton, you got good eyes. I'll tell you a song coming this way, Mr. Black. Jumping ship. My, that's a terrible thing to do. Mr. Black, inform the ship's company that these two men have been found. You're the one guilty of attempted desertion.

11:18Desertion? You kidnap me, you dirty crook. Don't you talk to Captain Howell that way. I ain't sinning them to 24 hours, Hallwatch. Take them away. Morton, take them to the Aft lot. I said. You calm down after 24 hours, I'll watch. What's Hallwatch? It is simple. We put you two in space suits. Javier threw the airlock on the end of a line. You sit out there and watch the alpha 24 hours. No food, no water. And the eating units in those suits are just a little bit defective. Makes it interesting along about the 18-foward. But, here we are, gentlemen. The airlock. You get in there. Got five minutes to get into them suits before we blow the air out. See you in 24 hours. Maybe. Well, well, well, come back to water below.

12:20Water. Water. First thing, hey. You should control these animals instincts. They're water. Right, yeah. Yeah. It's like a bloody head. Enjoy. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. Joy. Joy, best out. Help him. He'll be all right. Teach him this in both of you. Take my advice and behave yourself. You've got 15 years to go on this airship. Your might as well make the best of it. Hey, Martin. What do you call this man? That's your super mighty food concentrate.

13:20What's the idea? Only two months out and on concentrates already? You can plan in right now. Yeah, I'm complaining. If Captain Howell's jizzling on the manifest, that's his business. But when he tries to take it out now, how can he point a Rotterdamer to Mr. Black? Concentrate is what you get to eat from your own head. Now shove it into your face and keep quiet. Suppose I shove it into your face and see how you like it. What's going on in here? What's going on? Martin. He struck me. He struck me, arch-want. 48 hours, how much? All right, what are you all looking at? Get back into your places. Martin, bring that man down to the after lock. It's murder. That's what plain murder. Space code gives a 30-hour limit for punishment.

14:22They didn't even have a burial. Just shoved him out the lock. But the owners knew about this. They'd stop it. Fat letter good. That's going to do us during the next 15 years. Wait a minute. We'll get the ship back to Mars. Now, two weeks after we landed, we'd be hung. That's what Space Code says about Newton. And if they catch you in the air, they shoot you down and no questions. All right, I will let it take that chance. We're going to let Black and Hall kick us around for 15 years. Why don't we take over and head back? Right. I'm for it. Let's go. You're back. Going to remiss of the gentleman. Discussion. Talking about the captain, maybe... Grab him. Get out of the house. Slug him in an outfit. If you wore out of the island ships, or see your knife rations, that's what I'll have. It sure am I, or I'll wreck more. Well, that's done it. He's an officer. Who cares? Now we've got him moved now. Joey? Yeah. You get up the radio room and smash the set before they can get a message out. Right. Pop, you get off. Tell the engine watch.

15:23Rest of us will go up in the bridge. How about this, rat? Time up. Speed counts now. We've got to take over before they know what hit him. All right, careful. We've got a surprise. I don't worry. We'll get him cold. Jeff! Quiet! Sparks were sending one again, but I knocked him out and smashed the set. We're okay. Good boy. All right, come on. Right past the bulkhead. Look out! The blast bulkhead. Here, we cut off from the bridge. We'll never get through that. They must have found out somehow. The intercom. Black can turn it on from the bridge. You heard the whole thing. We better get out of here. What will they do? I don't know. We've got all the controls up there. We can shut down the driver, but we can't steer. You better dog down the hatch behind us. All right, man. Captain Hall is giving you one minute to give up. Quiet! In a big sigh, Black! You'll hang from your, and the every one of you. We don't know.

16:23Quiet. They can hear everything on the intercom. If I pull a jack out, that's it, boy. Look, we've got to get through to the bridge. It's a Mexican standoff. We can't get it then. They can't get it us. What's that? It's an air leak. The pressure's down. It's howl. He blew the hatch on the missile section. Just open the rope and let the air out. Martin, do you know what Black's going to do? He's going to bleed off the air down here. Save you all right. I admit we ought to see all out of the hole till your throat still... Still forgetting something, Martin. You're back here with us. What do you mean? If Black and Howl blow out compartments one by one or bleed the air off, you'll get it too. They'll take care of me, don't you worry about that? Oh, you think so, huh? Joey, plug that in to come back in. Right. Captain? Captain? Give it up. We've got Martin back here. Yeah? If you try anything on us, he'll get it too. What am I supposed to do, cry?

17:23You don't care if he dies? That's his problem. We're going to drop the arch again, level 5%. Can't do that to me. Captain! Captain! It's unfortunate that you were Captain Martin, but the security of my ship comes first. I mean, you don't care. You see me dead precisely. Well, you can't. It's murder. That's what. I'm not one of them. You can't kill me. You can't. Joey, pull it a complock. All right. There you are, Martin. They kill you just as soon as look at you. Now listen, we've got to get through that bulkhead. You know this ship. There must be some way. Martin, where your only chance, get us through the bulkhead. All right. All right, why shouldn't I? They killed me. Well, and there is a way to get through. An emergency release. The down-tail crewman abided to keep him from breaking through with an engine blast and leaking radiation to the bridge. Well, and let's get going. We've got to get through that bulkhead before Hall cuts the air down and gets us all.

18:27Here's the bulkhead, Martin. Where's the release? Under that floor panel. You can provide help. All right, hurry. I got it. I got it. Yeah, she's up. Wax on a K. Ready? All right, Martin. Open it up. Here it goes. We'll... What? He's dead. He's dead. Electrocuted, and the bulkhead's still closed. They didn't even get to turn that key at Kilden-Eastly. Harry, you know, if you got your watch gloves, they're insulated. Oh, yeah, sure. You're getting more than out of the way. You don't touch him, Joey. He's got the current through it. I'll submoe with the gloves. All right, now. Stay in by here goes a key. All right, let's go, get him. Come on in. Wax on a stand back there. All right, Plexi, all you work. Grab the gun. Joey, look out.

19:27Let's go, that gun, how? All right, hold him up. You don't have to worry about Plex. I got him squared with the wrench. We better tie up the captain. Well, what do you think you're going to do now? We're going to turn around and go back home. Uh-huh. I don't think so. I burned the navigation tapes, and none of you can recalculate them. Why, you just wander in space, the fuel gives out. You'll die right here on this ship. Oh, you just wander in space, the fuel gives out. You'll die right here on this ship. Jeff, Jeff, the other set of screens went on. Media? No, no, it's a ship. A patrol ship coming up on us. Oh, they must have got an SOS off here. Yeah, that's so sure they'll have to. Wait a minute, we don't have to worry, we can just tell him the truth. You're not familiar with Space Code, young man. Mutiny is punishable by immediate execution.

20:29In other words, they don't ask questions. They just shoot. He's right, Jeff. What's wrong? Can we get away? Not from a patrol ship. Already sent us a heave-to-flash, we'll run, they'll blow us out of space. I'm afraid your mutiny is about over with, gentlemen. There'll be a board in an hour, and ten minutes after that, you'll all be dead. Nobody move. Sergeant, take a squad and secure the ship. Collect all weapons and post a guard in the engine room. Yes, sir. Kill it. Roll, Williams, or 60. Well, I'm delighted to see you, Major. I wasn't quite sure my SRW has gotten through. Oh, your captain, howell? That's right. And I can swear out the avid avid mutiny. I don't think a mutiny charge will stand up, howell. Not with the relief of command warrant out for you.

21:31I think we'll just forget about it. But you can't do that. Space Code is clear. You recorded my SRW. No, we didn't, howell. And how'd you get here? They sent us after you to get Jeff Coffin. Very soon. I'm Jeff Coffin. Jeff, we had a missing person's alarm for you, and then when a check you sign, turn up at Marsport. A check? Well, that's right. I gave one to Morton to help me get away. And he sold it to a fence for half-face value. We traced it back to the ship. Coffin, I've got orders to escort you personally. We're taking you back to Earth. Can I send out a message, Major? Of course. Who will that reminds me, Jeff? I've got one for you from your fiancee. She said to tell you that she didn't object to the bachelor party in principle, but she did think six months was stretching it a bit. You have just heard X minus one, presented by the National Broadcasting Company, in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of astounding science fiction.

22:36X minus one was an NBC radio network production.