WHO knowS that RIGamarole

0:00I always think I would, I know where I was attempting to go that last one and never finished the thought or the loop of, it's like I started to think, right? It's like I was inspired to do X, Y and Z and I would go do it and then I would start to think so it's like I would, I got inspired to do the podcast right and share all this stuff and it was scary and it's weird how it's coming through and I understand how others can see it as like a whack of doodle and all types of things I mean at times I feel the same way and that's just my ego getting in the way right and then and then I would think like oh well let's go do this with it or let's go do that with it and I would get a my own way in a way to soothe my ego out of that embarrassment or out of whatever and would want to do X, Y and Z and X, Y and Z would just not work out so it's that idea of like it feels like the universe is like whatever you want and I go to do whatever I want and they're like no, no, no, no and so we have to you know we have to be true and honest with ourselves right and so like I said the outside of me that those around me have not encouraged me or

1:27offered to collaborate or any of these things and so it has been hard to be like at some point you do just think well don't you just give up or don't you just whatever and so it's that idea of the sports analogy again as I guess knowing when to pivot and when not to can be a challenge for a lot of us and at the same time it's I don't know that there's so much say that we have you know as long as your heart's in the right place and you want to feel good sometimes you just get swept into things even though it feels like you're battling yourself and that you're attempting you're trying so hard and you think to jump and you don't get to jump or you but in other words if you're still trying like you're still going up to bat and after a while you're like okay I think maybe baseball's not for me because I've gone up to bat so many times and so I think you're trying to pivot me and so you go to do something else and next thing you know you're right up to bat again and you're like

2:28what are you are you either going to have to make me really good at this or you're going to have to release me from this like what's up what am I not seeing you know I've taken lessons I've done this I've done that I can't seem to get better at this game and yet you won't let me leave the game and I'm putting in all my might and effort like what's the you know and so sometimes you just have to trust and believe and let go even though everything outside of you is saying you're really not good at baseball really should consider something else and and sometimes it is truth but it's like not time for that truth in other words it's it's almost like the universe sometimes will put us in that place where it's like that same analogy but technically it was just a waiting thing like you know what yeah they're totally not going to baseball that's not actually what they're going to do but I'm just going to have them that do that and just don't let them leave don't let them try you know just keep pivoting them back here because there's actually going to be this person who's

3:29going to show up at that game one day and is going to totally redirect them and they're going to take their hand and leave them in the correct right direction but they're only going to meet there so suck it up but a cup the embarrassed that you suck at that game because it's going to lead you to where you want to go so and and and and the whole point of it is it's like who knows that that rigmarole right we don't get a blueprint always we don't get a map and we don't get that understanding so it is letting go trusting and believing and not warping so tightly with our mind right trying to sink our way out of it oh god bless you right like I've been in those mental prisons and continue to be trapped in those mental prisons plenty of times where we which is kind of funny but it's like what it's funny and that like we don't want to feel we don't experience we say we do and yet we don't trust ourselves to feel it or be able to handle what

4:34we're feeling right like it's it's this idea where we have to trust ourselves our higher selves the universe the god within to like is I I got you and you you wanted to come you wanted to experience you wanted to feel so wow you're resisting why are you resisting the thing you want and yet we do all the time thanks so much for tuning in and listening you can now purchase an audio journey with me using the link below