Throwback Thursday: The Upper Limit Epidemic (exact steps to avoid self-sabotage and GROW)

Hi. How you doing? How's your day going? How you feeling? How's the fam? How's the biz? I hope you are

absolutely thriving.

Today I

I feel like I feel like it's a thriving vibe. It's still early, but like we're doing good. Honestly, I have so many

really good podcast ideas. I don't know what has what's hit me, but I

pretty much outlined three to four podcast ideas that I know. I know you are going to

freak over. You're just going to love them so much because I'm picking up on what you guys

are vibing with and I'm taking notes. Okay, I got you. And if you ever have a request, you can

always reach out a few of you have lately and it's given me so many ideas and I'm pumped. So

I actually am kind of bummed because I'm in such a mood to podcast. I wish I could just batch

episodes today, which I never feel like doing. I'm very like on the fly,

create as I go, one at a time type of person. But today I don't feel that way, but I have

I have lots of calls with incredible women. So I guess there's no room to complain

there. But today I do have time to knock this one out and it's a goodie. This I was going to

record a different one today. And then I went back and I was looking at the ones that I had outlined

and I was like, nah, we need to talk about this one first. This is this is number one priority.

And today we're going to talk about the upper limit epidemic. I don't know if that's the

title I went with because I haven't picked the title officially yet as I record this.

But as of right now, I have it as the upper limit epidemic. And that is so dramatic,

is it not? I was like, what exactly does epidemic mean? It means a widespread occurrence of

an infectious disease in the community at a particular time outbreak, plague, scourge, whatever

that means, infestation, widespread illness disease. And I was like, yeah, yeah, that makes sense.

Today we're talking about the upper limit epidemic. It's a thing. It's a problem. And if you're

not aware of it, it's going to get you. Okay. So my intention for this podcast today is to

raise awareness on what the upper limit theory is. And how to beat it? Ways that I have learned

over the years through my own business, how to kind of ride that wave and come out the other

side on top versus self-sabotage. Because when you don't have the awareness, then that tends to be the

thing that we do is self-sabotage and bump ourselves down a few notches. So let's get into it.

MPS, just a heads up, 100 days of killer content and 100 days of killer coaching are still available.

Or at least I think 100 days of killer coaching is still available. There are limited spots. So

a lot could happen between now and when this podcast goes live. But 100 days of killer coaching,

you can get at any time. And it's exactly what it sounds like. It's 100 content prompts,

half business, half personal that you can use instantly and get instant access to so that you can

show up and create consistently on social media without racking your brain on content ideas every day.

Because we know that that is a buzzkill. And then 100 days of killer coaching is where you will,

a group of women will have the ability to work with me for 100 days. You'll have the ability to

ask questions and get feedback at any time during the 100 days. Plus you're going to have weekly

coaching calls with me for personalized support on your content, brand decisions, social selling

strategies, mindset, energy, and whatever else comes up for you. You will also be in the

group with other incredible women that are eager to grow, support, and share each other on and

collaborate. This is seriously an incredible opportunity. So if that sounds good for you,

go to the link in the show notes. And if there are spots left, you can grab one.

All right. So let's talk about the upper limit epidemic. So what gave me the idea for this is

currently I am working with a handful of women in a program or an offer that I made a while ago,

about a month ago called vibes. And vibes is a five week one on one intensive. And in vibes,

I work with each of these women. And we create their own signature offer or offers. So we create

whether they want to do like a course or a program or a workshop or a digital program or whatever

they want to do. And we actually we outline it. We create it together. And we create a launch plan

for whatever it is that they're creating. Right. So in the way that I I launched vibes and

game changer mastermind 100 days of killer content. This is what I'm helping other women do for

themselves in vibes. It's freaking amazing. So a lot of the women that I'm working with that are

my vibe clients. They've never launched anything before for many of them. This is the first time

if you're not sure what launching is launching is where you are actively selling on social media.

So it could be your it could be your own thing, you know, like your your own offer or maybe you

work for a company and you sell product or service. You're like actively selling something.

That's what launching is. And a lot of these women they've never created their own

thing and launched it like gone out and for somewhere between seven to 14 days actively

are working toward filling spots in whatever their program is, whatever the thing is that we created.

And many well, I say many four or five of the women that I'm working with currently

are launching as we speak. Like it's it's game time, right? It's like we've been practicing for weeks

and now it's time to go. It's game time. And it's been really interesting and a cool experience

because all of their first launch jitters are coming up, are bubbling to the surface.

All of the mindset blocks, all of the insecurities, right? And it's so interesting to see

because for the first few weeks that we work together, they feel so good about what they're

creating. They feel so confident. They're getting so excited about the possibilities,

about the value that they're about to put out into the world and the people that they're

going to get to impact. And the revenue that could potentially come and flow into their business,

it's so freaking exciting. And we get all fired up. And it's like, okay, we have our lunch plan.

This is when you're launching. Ready set, let's go. And then they go. And it's like, skrrrr.

And all of a sudden, all of that confidence, all of the excitement, it just

ceases, right? It just like falls below the surface of this insecurity and all of a

sudden where they were so sure about what they were doing. It's like, wait, wait, wait.

I don't know if I'm ready yet. Am I the person to do this? What was I thinking? What if nobody buys

everything? Like, everything that you can imagine is coming up. And the reason why I say,

this is cool for me to experience is because it takes me back. It takes me right back.

My job, my business, like literally, my responsibility as a business owner is to launch offers.

That is how I bring in revenue. That is my job is to launch. So I have, I have launched

many dozens of programs, dozens of offers. I have sold a lot, right? And that doesn't mean

that I don't get pre-launched hitters. I do every single time. That doesn't mean that mindset blocks

don't come up for me. That doesn't mean I don't have moments of insecurity and doubt and confusion

and freakouts and all. That still happens for me every single time just about depending on what

the thing is and how long the launch is. But here's the difference. I've been there done that.

I've done it. I've lived through incredible launches, launches that blew my mind, launches that

brought in a level of revenue that I didn't even think was possible to get in such a short period

of time. And that changed lives, that changed my life, that changed lives of the women that I

worked with, right? Like dream launches. I've lived through those. I've experienced what that feels like.

And more than that, 10 times more than that, I've experienced awful launches, nightmare launches,

launches that would scare you right out of your pants. Is that a thing? Not good, not great,

not fun. And I lived to tell the tale. And I've shared so much about my business and my results.

And if you've been listening to the podcast, you know, like I'm a growing business

in spite of or despite of the good and the bad launches, you know, it like it all adds up

together and it all has made me the business owner and the mentor that I am today, right? So like

I have that experience under my belt. So when those launch jitters come up and by the way,

pause, I meant to mention this earlier, if you don't make your own offers, like if you're not a

mentor, if you don't create your own like digital stuff that you sell something else online,

maybe for another business, this is absolutely a message for you too, because the upper limit,

epidemic, the upper limit symptoms, they don't just affect people like me or my clients. They

affect this is about this can be applied to business. This can be applied to your personal life,

to your health, to so many things. And I'm going to give you additional examples on like what

this can look like. So if you're thinking that this might just be for people like you know,

businesses similar to mine, absolutely not. So definitely keep listening. But like I said, I've

been there. I've done that. I've felt I felt those things. I've experienced great. I've experienced

ugly and everything in between. And I live to tell the tale. And I have that wisdom and that

the hindsight wisdom of all of that. So when those things come up for me, when I start experiencing

upper limit symptoms, and we're going to get I'm about to explain what this is and what that means.

When I start to experience those and I come up, I can catch them. I know exactly what it is that

I'm dealing with. And I can be so much more mindful and thoughtful with how I respond and move

forward in the actions that I take in the things I do to take care of myself. Okay. So I'm seeing

these incredible women experiences for the first time. And I'm so thankful that I get to mentor

them through it because and and I'm so thankful that the first time I was launching, I had a mentor,

right? Like because if you don't have somebody or you don't listen to this episode, right? Like if you

don't know what the upper limit is and that it's normal and you don't know how to navigate it,

it's likely going to win because it's it's not fun and it's a it's a freaking roller coaster. So

anyway, that's what inspired this episode and why I wanted to talk about it. So what is the upper

limit theory? Anyway, what does this even mean? So first of all, this was coined by a man named Gay

Hendrix. He wrote a book called The Big Leap. I've talked about it before. It is a fan,

fantastic, but highly recommend because it's it's all about what we're talking about today.

But obviously a book on it. So he goes super deep and it's it's truly fascinating and again,

can be applied to so many different areas of of life, not just business. So what it is is essentially

we all have a baseline, right? All of us, we have a baseline of what we are comfortable with,

of what is like our homeostasis, what we're used to. And and everything, everything goes

goes into our baseline, not just business, but like this is what we're used to in terms of what

we make for revenue and the people that we work with and the people that the opportunities that

we say yes and no to the opportunities that we're attracting, like again, everything business

related goes into our baseline. And our relationships goes into our baseline, the type of people that

we put ourselves around, the type of behavior that we tolerate or don't tolerate, how we take care

of ourselves goes into our baseline, right? It's just like who you are right now for the most part

is your baseline and we all have that. Well, at some point, you might feel inspired to

grow in an area. Hopefully you do. So again, maybe in business, you decide, okay, in 2022,

I'm going to kick it up a notch. I am going to hire a team to be able to support more people.

I am going to create my own signature program so that I'm, you know, making a name for myself.

I'm going to start a podcast. I'm going to show up more confidently and consistently, right?

Or maybe you, it's something regarding your health. You're like, okay, I can do better health

wise. I want to be healthier. I want to feel better. So I'm going to start working out consistently

or I'm going to get into some sort of program. I'm going to stop drinking. I'm going to cut back

on food that I know isn't good for me. Or, you know, in your relationships, I'm going to put

myself around people that I feel good energy from and that, you know, that make me want to be a

better person. I'm going to, you know, make my social group smaller and make it bigger, whatever

the thing is. So you decide, okay, you're out of your baseline. And then like, you want to,

you want to grow in a certain level. So you set off to do that, right? You set off to like,

let's use business, for example, and let's use my, my clients, my vibes clients, right? So

they come to me, they say, hey, I'm ready to put out this offer, help me create it, help me

launch it. I'm like, heck yeah, let's freaking go. We do it. They go to do it. And this requires

a different set of actions. This requires a new set of behavior. This requires new beliefs,

right? When you go to do something new that you're not used to yet, it requires you to act and behave

differently. So the way that gay in the book kind of illustrates this, which I really like,

and I use a lot when I'm explaining this, is it's like, you're turning up the heat, so to speak,

in that area of your life. Like you're used to, your baseline is a cool 65 degrees. That's what

you're used to. That again, that's your, that's your comfort level. So my vibes clients, they want to

turn the heat up. They want to create their own offer and launch and become, you know, a creator of

their, their own offers. So they go from 65 degrees. And now it's time to launch and they're,

they're putting themselves out there. They're marketing themselves as the creator of this thing.

They're showing up every single day, sending out emails, right? They are operating at a level.

Many have not operated yet. So they just went from 65 degrees to 75 degrees. And when you do that,

when you change that behavior and you increase the, the temperature, so to speak, in an area of life,

at first it feels very hot. You are not used to it. You have been chilling,

fully acclimated at 65 degrees, right? And then you just can't embald into a room that is 10 degrees

hotter. And you're starting to sweat, right? You have not acclimated to this next level version of

you yet. So what happens at this point is you start to experience these thoughts of like,

wait a second, this is uncomfortable. This doesn't feel right. I, like, my brain is freaking out.

Because remember, and we've talked about this before, our brain's job is predominantly to keep us safe,

right? Like that's that's basically our job, our brain's job. I mean, it's probably not

basically, but that's one of the things that's very concerned with is keeping us safe. So when we go

and we all of a sudden shift our behavior in such a intense way, your brain's like, what the

frick, dude, what are you doing? Like this, this is different. This is hot. Like I'm uncomfortable,

you're uncomfortable, like knock yourself down a couple of notches because this don't feel right.

And what this looks like and what this manifests as in real life are limiting thoughts and beliefs.

Who am I to do this? This isn't going to work. What if nobody buys? What if people think I'm an

imposter? I am an imposter that, you know, like we've all experienced this. Our brain just like it,

it starts looking for everything that can absolutely go terribly, tragically wrong in this situation,

right? However rare it may be, it's like, whoa, you, like you could die here. You need to go back

into, into your little bubble. So that's what the upper limit theory is is like, when you go to change

something and grow in a new way in your life, there is a time period of uncomfortability where you're

you know, that your mind freaks out. You're not comfortable. It doesn't feel normal yet. You're not

acclimated. You haven't been doing this long enough. You haven't created the habits. You're

totally out of your comfort zone. So because of this, what starts to happen is your brain starts

offering up a ton of excuses and options to bow out, right? You're not ready yet. Push it back,

procrastinate. Wait two more weeks. No, no, no, no, don't invest in that. It's not safe.

Pay off your student on debt first. You know, like you, you know, you know, I know, we all know,

we've all been there. We've had the excuses, right? There's always an excuse. Always.

For every good thing you want to do in your life, we can pull out 10 excuses,

why it's not the time and why it'd be good to put it off and to wait or just stay in that job,

stay in that relationship, stay where you are, right? We can all, there's a million excuses and

that's what the upper limit theory is. It's like, if you are not aware of how that works and the

fact that this is so freaking normal, everybody experiences this at every level, every single time

and our job is to ride the wave. Our job is to understand that and to chill out, you know,

that don't, don't self-sabotage. Don't give in to those thoughts, right? That is our job. Like,

calm ourselves down, have that awareness and stay the course because there's a reason why

you set out to make that change. You knew that before going into it. There's a reason why you

decided, hey, this year is the year I'm going to grow my business. This year is the year I'm going to

get in control of my health or my relationship. This is the year that I let go of this habit and I

adopt a better one. You were very clear. Like, it was very evident and you were very excited in

the beginning, but then when you went to make those changes, things changed simply because of

what is now known as the upper limit theory. All right. So again, it can affect so many areas of your

life. It is not limited to business. It can be so many different things and we've all experiences.

I'm sure like as you're sitting here, you're thinking of past experiences where you have done

this yourself. I have so many. I cannot count. So number one, awareness is key. Knowing about this,

understanding it's a thing is probably one of the most powerful tools you can have in your tool

belt. As I know, if you listen to this podcast, you likely have big goals. You likely have a ton of

things that you want to change and grow into and improve this year and beyond. So knowing that

this possibly could happen as you go about creating those new habits and making those changes

is going to be a game changer for you because this will better allow you to hopefully stop that

self-sabotaging behavior before it starts. So how can we beat this? Like, past the point of a

awareness. How can we like in the moment beat the upper limit epidemic? Here from my own experience

and the many times I have fallen victim to this and beat the upper limit epidemic myself,

here are the tips that I would offer on how to like past the point of awareness when you're

actually in it. Here's how we can ride this wave and come out the other side as a boss and not

self-sabotaged. So the first thing that I would recommend is to ask yourself this question,

what is the worst thing that can happen here? Okay. So let's take it to our business example.

And I ask when clients this, typically this is one of the first things that I ask them whenever

they're having a moment of just a moment, an upper limit moment. I ask them, okay, take a deep breath

and I want you to really think about like in this scenario, what is the worst thing that can happen?

And typically they're like, well, you know, I don't sell any spots. And I'm like, okay,

so if you don't sell any spots, what are you worried about? Like, what are you scared of if you don't

sell any spots? Well, I won't get any revenue and I'll be embarrassed. Like, I've put myself out

there, nobody bought and that's embarrassing. I'm like, okay, that totally fair. But honestly,

how many people do you think are really paying attention? Like, how many people are really

paying attention to how would they know if anybody bought or not? Like, unless they actually reach

out to you and ask, which by the way, you can totally dodge that question or just own it.

But like, is that really the worst thing that can happen? Like, people aren't paying attention to

you or us, not even close to what we think. We all think we're the center of the universe.

And it's just not true. Like, you think you're the center of the universe? I think I'm the center

of the universe. Who's right? Right? Like, I'm worried about me. You're worried about you.

You're not going to know how my launch is ending up. So is these other people, right? Or like,

neither of these other people. So it's like, okay, yeah, that's fair. But what about the revenue?

I'm not going to get any revenue. Okay, are you going to go homeless? No. Are you going to have

food on the table tonight for your kids? Yes. Are you, is anything bad going to happen if you don't

hit this revenue goal in this moment? And typically, the answer is no. Like, we're going to be okay.

It's, you know, this is extra money or, or, you know, I can launch something again.

Cool. So is that actually the worst thing that can happen?

No. So what we do is typically business-wise, it comes down to what if I don't get the result

or what if I'm embarrassed? I would say like, that's probably top two fears that people have when

it comes to putting themselves out there and trying something new is like, what if it doesn't work?

And the embarrassment that comes with that. And again, just like that feeling of failure.

But what we don't do is we don't go deeper into that. We don't actually like ask further questions

about that situation. So we say, oh, this is going to be so embarrassing. No, self sabotage. Stop it.

Like, stop what we're doing immediately. I cannot be embarrassed. I cannot. No.

Like, I would much rather, I would much rather stop right now than not potentially not get the

results that I want to get so that I avoid embarrassment. When in reality, who the F would know?

Like, most, most people would not know. And if they did, who cares? You tried something new.

You put yourself out there like what? That's so admirable. So what I've learned is that the worst

case scenario is not what we think it is, which is failure, right? We all think it's the failure.

That's the worst case scenario. But that is not even close to the worst case scenario.

The worst case scenario in my experience is that you don't see it through all the way,

that you don't actually give yourself a fair chance at winning whatever it is that you've set out

to do because you self sabotage or you fear or you don't even get started in the first place.

That is the absolute worst case scenario, not knowing. That is bad.

Because I can tell you right now, there have been every single time I have gone to do something new.

And then for whatever reason, push it back because of these fears, it's like this constant nagging of

what if it had gone great? What if it had been your biggest launch ever? What if it had changed this

into business? What if, and then I end up going and doing it anyway, right? Because that regret,

that nagging regret will drive you insane or at least it does for me. So I'm going to do it anyway.

So why not just do it now and just figure it out. You know, you get so you learn more about yourself

in business. When you put yourself out there, when you were like actively selling and launching

or just going for like a big goal, then you will learn in so many different areas.

So like that's a business example. Same thing with, you know, it could be health or relationships.

What's the worst thing that can happen here? What you're the person or, you know, let's say it's

like health-related. What's worse thing can happen? You get sore. You're tired. You decide to quit

75 day hard like I did and you adopt a new program that's a better fit. Like what is the worst

that can happen? And typically the true answer is, is that you didn't even try. You or you tried

and you quit midway because fear that it wouldn't work. But guess what? Both options are available.

You have just, you have the same amount of this thing working really well as it quote failing,

which is even in failure if you actually give it a shot, right? Like you have the same

possibility and opportunities for both. It working really well and it not. So you're going to sit

here and spend your energy and focus on what if it doesn't work? Like is that what we're doing here?

So number one, what's the worst thing that can happen? Ask yourself that question and go deeper into

it. Number two, understand that what we choose to focus on is a choice not a given.

And I have to remind myself this constantly, same thing with the women that I work with.

Because in moments where you are uncomfortable and your brain is darn near a fire flight,

right? Remember, we've been conditioned in a way to look for what's wrong. What's wrong here?

What can go wrong? How am I going to die? How am I going to fail? How am I going to be embarrassed?

What are all the things that can go wrong? And it's so loud. It's so loud. It feels so real.

It's like the monster that is underneath your bed, right? And it sounds so freaking scary.

But then often when you look underneath the thing and you actually take a look at it,

it's actually just a tiny little mouse that's making a bunch of racket. It's comparatively,

like nothing, nothing to actually be concerned with. But we blow it up so big in our minds,

it feels so serious when you're not acclimated and you're not used to whatever it is that you're

doing, right? So this is where we have to remember, like as adults, as powerful women,

we choose what to focus on. What we choose to focus on is it absolute choice? It is not a given.

We can control what we focus on. Okay? So where people go wrong is they forget that and they're like,

why can't help it? This is like, well, you know, what if this, what if it like cut it out?

Woman up. You are in the game. You chose to be here. Now is not the time to be looking over there

and looking at all of the worst case scenarios. Because guess what? If you look to the left,

there's a bunch of best case scenarios and you haven't even glanced over there. You

won't even give them the time of day. So here we are staring at a train wreck. Where do you think,

what direction do you think we're going to go? We're probably going to go towards where you're

focusing, where you're staring right now. Get over it. We have to be mindful and make a conscious

effort to focus on what we actually want to create versus what we don't want to create.

Because if you focus on it, it's going to come to fruition in some way. Right?

So a lot of people and I know, I mean, we've hurt how many times have you heard this? How many times

have we heard? I'll believe it when I see it. I know I have heard hundreds of people say that,

right? I'll believe it when I see it. Okay. Yeah. Okay, crazy person. I'll believe it when I see it.

And I know, like, I adopted that. I absolutely adopted this belief that until you see it,

it's not, it's not real. It's not a thing. It's all make belief until you actually see it in

physical form. What I have learned in my four years of growing this business is that that attitude

is a choice. And that attitude is not going to get you very far, especially if you haven't created

the thing before, right? If you haven't created a level of success, a level of proof,

in whatever area of life that you're trying to grow into, how are you going to see it?

It's not there. So if you can't see the results yet, you can't believe in it.

So you are going to walk around like a poster child of doubt because it's like, well, I don't see

it. So I can't believe it. I don't see the revenue in my bank account. So I'm a loser.

I don't see the pounds melting off my body. So I'm unhealthy. I don't deserve to be here.

I still feel blah. I still don't have energy. So that's just who I am. So many people think

that way. What I have learned is that you can flip that and it is a choice. And it takes some

practice, but is absolutely available to every single one of us. And that is, I'll see it when I

believe it. When I believe that I am the person to create this level of results in my business,

in my life, in my relationship, in my health, at any point in time, doesn't have to be instantly

now. But when I believe that I'm that type of chick, then I'm going to see it. Because when you

believe you are that type of person who can have that level of results in whatever area of life,

guess what you're going to do? You're going to show up and you're going to do the work. If you

believe it is possible, if you believe that you are worthy, you're going to get up and you're

going to do the things that you need to do to win the game. When the thoughts of self sabotage

come up, you're going to be like, that's not me. That's old me. I'm the person who gets this level

of results. I don't know when they're going to be here. That's none of my business. When we plant

a seed in the ground, we don't stand over it and put our hands on our hips and we're like, okay,

sprout. Hello. It's been an hour. Where are you? The seed's broken. Stop watering it. No. You water

the damn seed and you know that it's going to sprout at some point. We don't know when. You can't

know when. But you know that if you show up and you water the thing, you give it what it needs

and you do the actions that are required to grow the seed, the seeds likely going to grow.

And if it doesn't, you plant another one. And in the same way, we set out to do new things and

when we don't see instant or near instant results, what do we do? We stop watering the seed.

We self sabotage. We quit. We postpone. And then it doesn't grow. And it's a self-fulfilling

prophecy. And then we're right. We said, you know what? I, I'm not ready for this. And then

it doesn't grow. It doesn't happen. You're like, see, I knew it. Now you're right. You proved

yourself right. So what we choose to focus on is an absolute choice. And if you choose to focus

on worst case scenarios, that's on you. 100%. Both are available. What are you going to focus on?

It may not, it may not end in a picture-perfect scenario. But like, get up and try again.

This is life, baby. This is like literally why we're here. And you will learn so much from that

experience. If you see it through, if you finish out the workout plan, if you actually attempt to

quit drinking, if you actually attempt to improve your relationship, if you actually see a launch,

fully till the end till cart closed, the game is over. Fourth quarter, zero seconds left on the

clock. It's done. You gave it your all. If you see it through, regardless of the results,

you are going to have so much wisdom and knowledge and insights that you never could have had before.

That you can take and apply to the next try, whatever that is. You get smarter, faster,

better, every single time. You cannot not grow with that kind of knowledge and effort.

It's going to work eventually. It has to. But it can't, if you keep focusing on worst case scenarios,

and if you self-sabotage and hold yourself back every single time, or quit before, you can actually

see the final results. And then the last thing here, while I've tumor,

the next piece of advice that I would offer when it comes to beating the upper limit epidemic is

check their mindset, right? Like, pass a point of what you're focusing on, like,

keep, you have to, you know, what I love the game analogy. It just, it makes so much sensory.

So let's bring it back to that. Like, when you're in the game, when you're actively

going for the thing that you want, no matter what it is, whatever area,

you have to check your energy every step of the way. Here's what I mean.

So there's a big, I want you to imagine these two scenarios.

So in our business example, I want you to imagine that you are in the middle of launching

your own offer, right? You're putting it out there. It's mid-launch. I want you to imagine

mid-launch, most of the spots are filled. Things are just clicking into place. They're working for you.

Rivenews come in through the door. People are excited. And you have a, you have a few spots left to fill,

but like, it's, it's already amazing. You're likely going to hit your goal.

So that scenario number one, right? Scenario number two, it's mid-launch, whatever it is that you're

selling your midway. And it's not exactly going as planned. Engagements a little slower.

The excitement isn't, like, it's not like, you don't see it or feel it as much from people that

you have kind of anticipated. Maybe a couple of spots left to fill, maybe they haven't, but like,

you thought by now, sales will be farther along. It's just, it's just different. It's not,

it's not going as planned, right? So we have scenario one, it's working beautifully scenario two.

Now I want you to imagine both of these people have to go into their stories and sell, right? Both

of these people, option A, where like, they're having an incredible launch and option B, not so much.

And then they go into their stories and they are attempting to continue to sell whatever it is

that they're selling. How do you think those two people's energies would differ?

You can probably imagine that, right? You've probably witnessed somebody who is selling something

and it's going really well and they're showing it up. They're like, hey, we have two spots left.

This is, I'm so excited. We start next week. I would love to have you in. This is an incredible

opportunity. I'm so excited for the women that I get to work with. If you want one of the next two

spots, hit me up. Otherwise, I'll, I'll see you later, you know? And then you can imagine the other

person is like, hey, okay. So yeah, you know, I'm going to handle some objections. Like, if you

think this is too expensive, let me explain to you why it's not like why you need this. This is why,

like, there's so many misconceptions about, you know, like, you could have met, you've,

you've probably witnessed these two scenarios, right? Very different energy happening here.

One is neutral, calm, confident. Like, if they don't sell another spot, it's all good because it's

already like been an incredible experience. And the other person is like, you're sensing like a

little bit of chaotic energy, a little bit of desperation, a little bit of like grasping for

straws, right? Hey, we, hey, you can get 20% off now. We've added a coupon. I've added like seven

one-on-ones now to this offer. Let's hop on a discovery call. Talk to you for an hour about it,

to sell you on it. It's a very different energy. But here's the kicker. In both of those scenarios,

you don't know if that's actually what's going on, right? Like, the person who shows up calm

and neutral and confident, you don't know if they're actually having an incredible launch. You

don't really know that, but you're just picking up on their vibe, right? You just like get that from

the stories. And the other person, same thing, they could be having a great launch, they could be

having a crappy launch. But like, there's something about their energy, like, something's not off,

they feel a little unsure, a little unconfident, a little, uh, something's off. Like, I don't know

if I'm going to invest in that. Okay. This is managing your energy. This is like what I like to call

is playing to win versus playing not to lose. Playing to win is where you believe before it's even

there that the outcome's in the bag. It's happening. If not now, it's going to happen in the future.

So like, that's none of your business. But like, it's, it's happening. We're going to win.

So you show up with that energy, you show up with the energy of it's done. I've won the game.

Versus playing not to lose is holy crap. We're losing. This is falling out of my grasp. What can I do?

Like, what last minute decisions can I make? What can I say here? What can I do to, to talk people

into this? What can I say? You know, it's, it's that like, again, like, I think of like grasping for

straws. Like, what can I add on? What can I change? What can I push back to, to get people's attention

here? It's very different energy, very different. Okay. Huge. Your job when you are in this, I know

obviously in different areas of life, this is going to differ depending on what we're talking about.

But in business, this is, you know, when you're actively selling something, this is critical

because people don't know the back end of your business, but they can see you and they can feel you.

And if you're given off lack of confidence vibes, why would anybody buy whatever it is that

you're selling? If you don't believe in it, I'll see it when I believe it. That is playing to win.

And then the last piece of advice I would give when it comes to overcoming the upper limit at the

pandemic is regardless of the outcome, regardless whether the launch doesn't go as planned. You

don't hit your sales goal. You relapse on whatever it is. You go back into the unhealthy

relationship or the unhealthy habits, right? You fall back. You go from 75 back to 65. Guys, we're human.

It's going to happen. The amount of times this has happened in life and in business for me is

astounding. Like, and it's nothing that I'm ashamed of. I'm a freaking human. It's going to happen

for all of us. None of us are meant to be perfect. None of us set out to do something new and nail it

every single time. Otherwise, we would all be thriving. We would all be millionaires, billionaires

with the most amazing habits and bodies and relationships, right? Like, it would be easy, but it's not

growth is not easy. Growth is not comfortable. If it was easy, we'd all do it. So like,

regardless of how it works out for you, get up, dust it off. What did we learn from this?

How did we self-sabotage? What could we have done better? What did we choose to focus on?

And do it all over again. Because you're a freaking boss and you did not come on this planet

to not grow and to not do the things that you set out to do and that you dream of doing.

You did not come here to play small. You did not come here to be unhappy or unfulfilled. You came

here to grow into the fullest, most vibrant, happy, giving, loving version of yourself.

Every single one of us. You're worthy of it. You deserve it. Dust it off and try again.

I love you. This was helpful. Shoot me a DM. Screenshot it. Leave me a review. I hope it was.

And I'll see you next week. Bye.

Hey, friend. Thank you so much for listening. My goal is to help as many women as possible. And if

this episode supported you in any way, the very best way to show your appreciation is by simply

screenshotting this episode and sharing on your social media or with your team. Or even better,

drop in me a review on whatever platform you're listening on. Don't forget, if you're looking

for additional support, you can always reach me on Instagram at Allie I Reaves and or you can join us

in the free six-figure influencer Facebook group. See you back here next week.