The Problem With Trying to Feel Better: Dr Julie Smith

Dr Julie Smith joins James Smith for a wide-ranging conversation on the psychology of emotion, mental health, and what it really means to feel better. A clinical psychologist and international bestselling author, Dr Smith dismantles the idea that difficult emotions are problems to be solved and challenges James on everything from catastrophising and shame-based motivation to the surprising emotional cost of success. 👁️ Try Neutonic: https://www.neutonic.com/jamessmith 🧪 Check your Test: https://www.manual.co/smith 📝 Business Mentoring: https://www.jamessmith.business 🏋🏼‍♂️ Online Coaching: https://www.jamessmithacademy.com Dr Julie Smith's YouTube Channel – https://www.youtube.com/@DrJulie Dr Julie Smith On Instagram –https://www.instagram.com/drjulie/ James opens up about his experience of lockdown, being cut off from Australia, the relief (not happiness) of hitting major milestones, and why he uses financial goals as a psychological permission slip to keep overworking. She explains: ◼️ Why wanting to feel better is sometimes part of the problem ◼️ How to recognise when distress is situational vs something deeper ◼️ The double standard we apply to ourselves vs others ◼️ Why self-compassion isn't weakness (it's the harder skill) ◼️ What status loss does to mental health and identity Chapters: 00:00 The Problem With Trying to Feel Better 04:20 When Anxiety Means You're a Good Parent 07:23 Is Low Mood Situational or Something Deeper? 12:10 When Should You Actually Get Therapy? 13:52 James Being Locked Out of Australia 15:36 Not Feeling Like You Qualify for Help 17:34 The Workaholics Trap and Honest Feedback 18:45 Psychedelic-Assisted Therapy — Where Does Dr Smith Stand? 20:23 James's LSD Day in the Park 21:49 The Periodic Table of Emotions 27:12 Vulnerability, Fatherhood and Opening Up 29:08 Redefining Success Beyond the Metrics 32:26 Giving Good Advice You Don't Take Yourself 34:49 Severance and the Work-Life Split 38:07 The Hidden Cost of Living a Very Public Life 41:24 When Followers Tell You You've Saved Their Life 44:28 How a Relationship Changed James's Relationship With Work 45:13 Status, Mental Health and the Fear of Losing It 53:01 The Double Standard We Have for Ourselves 55:42 Using Financial Goals as a Coping Mechanism 57:28 Catastrophising as Motivation 01:00:04 Why Every Goal Feels Empty After You Hit It 01:02:51 Fear of Success vs Fear of Failure 01:08:30 The Journey Is the Point — Not Just the Outcome 01:09:18 Sneak Peek: Dr Smith's New Book 01:10:21 Generational Amnesia and the Young People of Today 01:15:08 Closing Takeaways: What Actually Helps This conversation takes a candid look at the psychology behind overwork, the emotional emptiness that can follow achievement, and the courage required to actually let people in. Dr Smith's clinical perspective on self-compassion, attachment, and the standards we hold ourselves to offers a grounding counterweight to James's trademark candour — and the result is one of the most honest conversations on mental health the podcast has produced. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices