Life Matters

The following commentary does not necessarily reflect the views of the staff and

management of WBCA or the Boston Neighborhood Network. If you would like to

express another opinion, you can address your comments to Boston Neighborhood Network,

3025 Washington Street, Boston, Massachusetts, 02119. To arrange a time for your

own commentary, you can call WBCA at 617-708-3215 or email radio at bnnmedia.org.

Hello, welcome to Life Matters. I'm your host, Brendan O'Connell. Well, I had the

great pleasure of meeting this lady from West Texas in not century city.

Down in Washington, DC, at the National Rights of Life Convention, and she's

really had quite a life and quite an interesting life, and we're going to take a

look at that today and the kind of work that she's doing now. But I'm just

going to reach you a very brief little background of this guest. Molly White is

a bold voice for the life, faith, and family in Texas and beyond. For nearly three

decades, Molly had been sharing her life, altering personal experience of

abortion offering firsthand insight into the deceptive trade practices of the

abortion industry, post-abortion trauma and moral injury that follows, and the

path to healing and redemption to audiences around the world, including

legislators, world leaders, and amicus briefs defending pro-life laws. Well,

welcome Molly White. Well, thank you, Brendan. It's the honor to be here with you today.

Molly, I got to ask you, how did you ever get involved in the right to life world?

Well, let's go way back. We'll go back to 2001, and I had just actually

graduated from college while my boys were graduating from high school, and I was

getting back into my daily Bible reading, which I hadn't done a whole lot when I

was in school. So I was sitting on my front porch reading a

Psalm a day. I read a Psalm a day and a proverb a day. And on July 23rd, 2001, I read

Proverbs 23. You see, July, well, maybe when the seat was dry, anyway, I was reading

the scripture. And July 24, Proverbs 24, and it said, rescue those being led

away to death. Hold back those staggering towards slaughter. But if you say to me,

I don't know what you mean. Don't I receive your heart? No, what you know? It will

I not hold you into account. And Brendan, it was just like the sky burst open,

and the sonic boom just hit me right in the chest and kind of pinned me back into

my chair. And I knew that I knew instantly that God had just spoken to me through

his word. He just called me to do something in his word. And I knew in the back of

my mind, it had to do something with the abortions that I had as a younger woman.

And the next couple of weeks, I kind of

travailed over that. I prayed about it. I was seeking the Lord. What is it? What

is it? What do you want me to do? And it was just a few days later, maybe I told

some friends and I was at a girlfriend's house. And I just had this heavy bird

because I knew God was calling me, but I didn't know what he wanted of me. And so it

was at that moment in my girlfriend's kitchen that I just threw up my hands. I said,

okay, Lord, here I am. Here I am. Send me. I will go where you want me to go. I'll do what

you want me to do. I'll speak what you want me to speak. Here I am. And it was just a

matter of a few weeks after that, Brendan, that I had met Alan Parker, he is the CEO of the

Justice Foundation in San Antonio, Texas. I heard him on the radio talking about his

efforts to overturn Roe B. Wade based on representing the Roe, normal Macquarie and the Doe,

Sandra Cano, and their efforts to have their cases overturned. And he was looking for women who

had been harmed by abortion to be planked, isn't that case, or to send our testimonies of how

abortion hurt us. And so I did all of that. I sent in my testimony and he had been invited me to

go to DC and to a national press conference held by Janet Folger Porter now. It was called

Shake the Nation Back to Life. And I went as a guest of Alan's and maybe had the opportunity

to share my testimony during the press conference. And God did open that door for me and I was scared

to death. I was shaking. I was sweating. I was so scared. But I shared my experience and how

it impacted my life. And from that moment on, you can't shut me up. You know.

Can you just tell us what the abortion that you had, what a little bit of the background there,

what led you to Alan Parker and his organization?

Yeah, we'll go way back even more. I was about 21 years old and I had found out that I was pregnant.

And I went to a local, actually went to a local medical clinic to confirm my pregnancy. And

when the doctor came back in with the pregnancy results, he came over. I was sitting on the table.

Padding me on the knee goes, well, you're right. You are pregnant, but don't worry about a thing.

You can have an abortion. Well, Ben and that was the first time I ever heard the word abortion.

I didn't even know what it was. I grew up wanting to have 10 children.

But since he introduced this word abortion to me, my mind started thinking, well, I'm not married.

I could avoid shaming my parents. And so I just kind of started entertaining that choice because

the doctor said it's quick and easy. There's nothing to it. You'll get your life all back to normal again.

And so he gave, in fact, he even wrote down the name and number of an abortion clinic in Austin,

Texas, which I didn't live too far from. And so on my way home, I was thinking about what he was saying.

And I was trying to rationalize it's like, you know, if it's legal, then it can't be a baby.

It can't be legal to kill babies. And if a doctor had recommended it to me, then it can't be risky.

He sure that he wouldn't tell me to do something that would hurt me.

You know, so I did call the number and they scheduled me to come in real quick.

And I remember a friend drove me. I think it was just a couple days later.

A friend drove me about an hour to Austin. And we didn't talk. But my mind and my heart were really

battling against each other. My mind was trying to rationalize where you could avoid shaming your

parents. The father of the babies already left you. You know, the doctor said it was a good choice.

And then my heart was saying, you know, it's a baby, it's your mother. But I didn't really hear that.

I just knew I was very conflicted. So in order for me to settle my heart, I decided that when I

went into the clinic, I was going to ask important questions like, fetal development. I'm probably

eight weeks pregnant, maybe 10. I said, what stage of development? What does my baby look like?

And the woman behind the desk took a pin and she put a little dot on a piece of paper. She says,

it is no bigger than that little dot. And so I'm thinking, oh, okay, well, the baby's not developed

yet. You know, and I said, well, are there any risks involved with the procedure afterwards? You

know, oh, no, no, you'll be in and out in 20 minutes. There's nothing to it. You know, you might feel

like you're starting your period, but it's just in and out. There's nothing to it. So

I was told this lies. I believed them, but I still was not 100% committed to having that abortion.

And I think they could see that in me. And so they rushed me right in the back. I never sat in the

waiting room. I never waited for my name to be called. They took me right to the back and

started explaining to me in a group of other women about this procedure, which that's all a blur

to my mind. But I know as soon as I got on that table and as soon as that procedure started,

then reality hit. And I screamed and I cried and they tried to make me cry at them. And

went through the most horrible, painful, it was painful physically. But I think that pills

and comparison to the pain that I felt emotionally. And after a little bit of time of recuperating,

they sent me out the back door into an alley full of trash cans. And I had to walk around the

behind that building to do that alley around to where my friend was waiting. And so that's kind of

left an impression on me too that the alley where they dumped the bodies of babies, probably in those

trash cans. And that it's still a back alley business. Wow. And did you subsequently have another

abortion or did you have some difficulty with burthing? And how many children do you have now?

Well, you know, after that abortion, you know, because like I mentioned earlier, I grew up

wanting 10 children. I loved children. I babysit at all the time, even babysit in college. And

when I was younger, I went to school. And so I immediately thought I have to get pregnant again.

I have to prove to myself that I could be a mother, a good mother. So I got pregnant again

within a short period of time of that. And ended up finding out that I was carrying triplets.

Me and the father of the children did marry, but that marriage did not last beyond the birth of

my children. He did not want to be the father of three children. And so that relationship started

crumbling, but I did give birth to triplets. And two of them were still born. And that was devastating.

Because I thought at that time that God had punished me for having an abortion, I thought that was

my punishment. And it was emotionally devastating. So now I'm dealing with the trauma of abortion.

Now I'm dealing with the trauma of two stillborn children. And I'm trying to be a good mother

to the beautiful little baby boy that survived all of this. And so it was a very dysfunctional

cycle that I was in, you know, trying to be a good mother when I'm emotionally crippled.

And then a few years after that, you know, I'm still in this terrible destructive cycle,

not making good decisions. I got pregnant again. And that time I succumbed to severe pressure

to have an unwanted abortion. And I did not want to have the abortion. But I felt like an

animal trapped in the cage. From the boyfriend or from your parents. My parents. My parents.

Because they were, you know, they were helping me raise my son. Of course, you know, they were in

barrists. And it was severe pressure. And so I even told the doctor, even that was a horrible

experience because this doctor wanted to do a two-day procedure where he would insert laminaria

into your cervix and force it open overnight. And you go back to the abortion. Well,

that's really a second trimester abortion. And I was not in my second trimester. But this is

hind. This is foresight. At that time, I did not know. But I did do remember that as soon as he

inserted that and he left the room, I just lost it. I came unglued. And I made so much noise that

the nurse came back in and tried to calm me down. And I said, you get him back in here and tell him

to take this out. I don't want to have this abortion. I never wanted to have this abortion.

I just buried two babies. I have a little boy at home. I cannot do this.

Well, the doctor came back in and it was the same clinic that I went to when I was pregnant.

My triplets, I did not know they did abortions at that time. And the doctor came back in and said,

oh, it's too late. If I removed the laminaria now, then I could damage your cervix and you would

miscarry anyway. Well, that's another lie. I found out years later that that was a lie. So,

you know, went home, had a miserable night. My parents drove me back the next day. I was just

miserable. I'm happy and pain. I told the doctor again, I can't do this. I don't want to do this.

And I told them all the reasons why. And he said, well, you have to now. You've already dilated.

You're going to miscarry if you don't. And so, again, I felt like a trapped animal.

And when I left the clinic that day, I was a walking dead woman. And I was completely shut down.

I had to shut up. All those memories, all that emotion, just a cope with life. But my life was

never the same again. And at that point, how old were you when you mid-20s? I was about 24.

24. And then, what was the turnaround? You talked about it a little bit, I guess.

What was the turnaround for you that brought you over to the pro-life side?

Okay. Well, I got married in 1989. A beautiful man was still married. And I wanted to have

another child. Only had one. And he had one of the previous marriage. And so we got pregnant

with our daughter. Our boys were both about 10 years old. We got pregnant with her. And during

my pregnancy with her, Brendan, I started having flashbacks. I started having nightmares.

I mean, I, it was all horrible nightmares of mutilated babies, flashbacks of my abortion experience.

I could not connect the dots, though. I could not connect what was going on with my previous

abortion. And so I thought it was going crazy. I cried a lot during that pregnancy, even though I

wanted this baby so bad. And so it was after, see, my daughter was born in November. And that

following January, I found out from a friend that a Mrs. Dobson with focus on the family was

going to be speaking at our local pregnancy center, fundraising banquet. Well, I had been listening

to focus on the family many years on the radio. And I thought, oh, I really want to go to that.

Well, and this all ties in, Brendan. So it was during that fundraising banquet that Mrs. Dobson

did not come. She had something happen. And so they sent a woman, they'd send a Massey to speak.

And Sidna shared about her abortion experience. And it took, it, it triggered me and all this

emotion wanted to come pouring out right in the middle of this banquet, sitting with strangers.

And I had to hold everything back. But long story short, from that, hearing her testimony,

it feeling how I felt about that, I started volunteering at that pregnancy resource center.

And they, they introduced me into abortion recovery, which I didn't feel like I needed to go

denial. But I did anyway. And that's when I started going through my healing journey.

And so that was back in 1993. And then I didn't do anything. I did go through recovery, but I really

didn't do anything with my testimony until July 24th of 2001 when God called me.

Now, you've written a book about your experience. Can you show us the book on screen?

And can you see it? Let me see if I get out of life.

Yeah, it's called deceived. And what's the rest of that underneath that would?

It says how God brought purpose from my pain. And the reason why I called it deceived, I mean,

this might not be a real popular kind of title to the book. But I was deceived in having these

abortions. I was lied to. I was deceived by the abortion industry. All I needed was some truth.

And I could have made a lot better decision. But this book is a very candid, open, honest, deep

memo, I guess. It's about my experience, what led up to the abortions, how it impacted me emotionally,

psychologically, spiritually, the loss of my triplets, how that impacted me, the second abortion.

And it takes you deep. But then it comes back up midway through. It'll come back up until how

someone looked this to me about the Lord Jesus, a total stranger, and how that just transformed my

life. And then how God took me on this healing journey. And I don't talk quite in depth about that.

But I do bring up three important facts about recovering from an abortion. Is you have to repent and

be forgiven by God. You have to forgive yourself. And you have to forgive everyone that's involved in

that decision. That's what's going to totally liberate you from the trauma of abortion. And so,

and then I talk about how, you know, once I surrendered to the Lord and then started sharing my

testimony, how all the doors that he's opened up for me in the past are going from leading operation

outcry, which is an organization by the Justice Foundation of women who've been hurt by abortion.

There's thousands of us. How we put on media events all over the country as we're trying to work

over turn will be way all my experiences with my testimony being used at Supreme Court level,

being invited to go to the United Nations. I've attended it over a dozen UN events,

defending life, motherhood, and families. And, and from a biblical worldview to running for office,

I mean, it just goes into how how God started using me because I surrendered my life to him.

What was it like when you first ran for state rep in Texas, what, what were you knocking on a lot

of doors or how are you how are you getting your name known in your state Senate? Was it

the Senate or rep district? Represented. And, you know, that's that's another cool story because

just like on July 24, 2001, when God called me out of Proverbs and I knew that I knew that God was

speaking to me. I was minding my own business. I never really wanted even considered going into

office because I was too busy in pro life work. And so I got a call one day. This was in 2013, probably

around July, August of 2013, right before the deadline of filing to run for an office. I got a

call from a friend that I didn't know very well. I knew him. And he said, Molly, this is John,

I want to ask you to run for state representative against the current representative. And

Brandon, it was like God, just spoke to me again. I just felt this boom right here in my chest.

And I knew that I knew the Lord had just called me to do something that was outside my desires.

And I said, well, yes, I really feel the Lord is telling me to run for office. And so I said,

let me pray about it. I'll get back to you. I've spoke to my husband. I prayed about it, spoke

to my family. We all got confirmation that I was to run for state rep. And now my family,

right, House District 55, which is in central Texas, my family's very well known. And I was pretty

well known because I've been in the papers. New newspapers, television, with my pro life activism.

And so I just got a team. And I told my team, I said, this is what the Lord's calling me to do.

This is our strategy. I'm in it to win it. And I tried to raise money. I think I raised a little

over $20,000. My phone has spent over 200,000. But I knocked on doors every single day, half a day on

Sunday and talked to thousands of people from that moment that I filed to the primary election day.

And that was exciting. I really loved that part of it. Were you outspent? You're saying 10 to 1?

10 to 1. Wow. And he'd been he'd been in office for about three terms. Three terms. Was he a pro,

was he a pro-abort or pro-life? No, he wasn't. He wasn't pro-abort. But he,

he just didn't have a very good reputation. And wasn't strong on a lot of other conserved values.

And I didn't run because of him in particular. I ran because that's what God called me to do.

And when God calls you to do something, I think there's several objectives. First, he's going to use

and all the experiences you've had for that position. And my agenda is to represent the kingdom of God

in that position and to defend the biblical worldview. No matter where he puts me, that's my job.

To represent his kingdom and to defend the biblical worldview. And that's what I took when I was

elected in the office. We've only got two minutes left, Molly. Can you tell us about

an experience you had in convincing someone who was at a abortion recovery weekend or whatever

that comes to mind that you feel good about? Something in particular during an abortion recovery

retreat? Yeah, retreat. Yeah, yeah. We just have a man or a soul. For me or for someone that I know?

Well, it could be for you or for someone you know. Well, all I can say is if you've had an abortion,

whether you're a man, the father of the baby, the mother of the baby, the grandparent of the baby,

aunt, uncle, whatever, it's imperative that you go through abortion recovery because it deals with

all of the roots and it deals with all the fruits that come from that experience. And for me,

tell, you know, having to say that out loud was the hardest thing I could ever do was share with

other women that I had an abortion. But through that, I felt God's grace. I felt His forgiveness.

I felt His presence. And I felt the burden of this sin of bloodshed and come lifting off my

shoulders. And for every other woman that I know and man as a gone through an abortion recovery

program, they've had that same experience because when you can witness the grace of God and the

forgiveness of God, the transforming power of God, it is life changing. It takes you out of that

bondage of blood guilt into total freedom that you cannot experience any other way.

Well, Molly White, our time has come to an end. Very interesting guest.

I hope I pass across again. I'm sure maybe in Florida or down in D.C. or someplace like that.

But thank you so much for being a guest on the show today.

And thank you for having me. Folks, we hope you enjoyed today's show and found the show to be

unique and formative content rich truthful and thought-provoking. Thanks for watching and listening.

I'm Brendan O'Connell, your friend for life.

The preceding commentary does not necessarily reflect the views of the staff and management of WBCA

or the Boston Neighborhood Network. If you would like to express another opinion,

you can address your comments to Boston Neighborhood Network, 3025 Washington Street,

Boston, Massachusetts, 02119. To arrange a time for your own commentary, you can call WBCA at 617-708-3215

or email radio at vnimedia.org.