HIDDEN EXPECTATIONS: When Silence Speaks Volumes

"Text us your thoughts and questions!"

In this episode we diver deeper into how the “hidden” parts of our awareness, specifically Hidden Expectations. Hidden expectations can contribute to more, not less, stress and discontent in relationships. We will continue to work with the JOHARI window as the model for brining what is “hidden” into the “open” domain.

📖 Explore More: 

Learn more about the JOHARI Window in our episode - “Blind spots, secrets, and the unconscious: JOHAR Window, Paths to being more Open.”

https://youtu.be/rAD5RvexdH8

From “Can you?” To “Willing to?” A Game-changing Ask https://youtu.be/161vVpM2XVQ

On how the Hidden contributes to conflict:

“Conflict Avoidance: The Cost of Pretend Harmony: https://youtu.be/un-mDRite2s

“Assuming: The Killer of Curiosity” https://youtu.be/d4ssF4EwV2k

“So you want to stop avoiding conflict: Now What?” https://youtu.be/oPBId3fVLZo

“Boost Team Dialogue: 8 Game Changing Behaviors: https://youtu.be/02wcjyjG8jE

SELF-AWARENESS EXERCISE:

1. Notice when you have strong emotional reactions like disappointment or resentment.
2. Was there an unmet need?
3. Was I expecting mind reading?
4. What behavior or action were you ‘expecting’ from the other person?
5. Are my expectations reasonable?
6. Where does this expectation come from?
7. Did you communicate that expectation? Did you communicate ALL the connected expectations?
8. Practice communicating expectations using “I” statements: “I have an expectation of….” As opposed to “You should….”

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(c) 2024, 2025 Karen Lee Lynskey & Christina Caro
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Disclaimer - This content is the personal opinions of Christina Caro, PhD and Karen Lee Lynskey and is for informational and educational purposes only. This is not...