He Asked to Lead a Bible Study

Welcome to Unwritten, a focused podcast dedicated to sharing stories of the movement of the Holy Spirit in the world today.

I'm your host Trevor Berecha, and on today's episode we're getting to hear from Vince Sartori.

I'd love to invite you to subscribe to the show wherever you're listening to leave a review.

It just helps us get more of these stories out here because we believe, like the last verse of John's Gospel,

that there are so many more stories of what Jesus is doing in the world that we want to bring to your ears and many others.

So my daughter is about to turn five years old, and the other day we were out on a walk, and we saw a rabbit running by and said,

that's a rabbit, and she looks at me, and she says, daddy, that's not a rabbit, that's a bunny.

We all have sometimes answers that don't quite square with us.

Sometimes answers that couldn't be more true, but for whatever reason, we're just not able to receive them at the time.

And today's story, Vince shares a moment where he has all the right answers.

And yet what changes the person's heart he's speaking to isn't an answer, but instead an invitation.

Welcome to the show and listen in.

I remember the moment, I pretty much blew it.

We were sitting in the Student Union halfway through lunch at Wendy's.

It was a good conversation up until that point.

Eric had texted me the day before.

Hey, Vince, I have a question for you.

When are you free to meet up?

He was new around the Catholic community, and I was really interested in getting to know him more and building a friendship with him.

So I agreed to get lunch with him the next day.

We talked about his life and my life.

He moved to the United States.

He had a great love of soccer, which was something that was pretty new to me.

And eventually our conversation got over to the point of our lunch.

And I asked him, so what did you want to ask me about?

He didn't really hesitate.

He dove right in.

You could see there was an excitement in his eyes and enthusiasm.

Vince, I see that there's other students here that lead Bible studies.

I know that you do that.

I want to lead a Bible study too.

I was so caught off guard in the best way.

Hey, it takes so much effort just to get a guy to show up to a Bible study that somebody literally asking,

Hey, can I lead a Bible study?

What is mind blowing?

I was so excited.

And so I said, yeah, absolutely.

I'd love to teach you how to about lead a Bible study.

Can I ask a few clarifying questions before we get into the nitty gritty?

He nodded enthusiastic.

You could see the things were going the right way.

So I asked him about his prayer life.

He said he didn't really have one.

He wasn't sure how to pray, but he really wanted to learn.

And then I asked him, was he open to being in formation, being taught more about the church,

being taught how to do a Bible study, how to how to live out mission on campus.

He was totally was open to that.

Then I asked him one last question.

Is there any teachings of the church that you struggle with or maybe find difficult to understand?

And he didn't avoid the question.

He nodded and said, yeah, there's one in particular.

The church is teaching on marriage.

Okay.

Tell me more about that.

At first, he gave me the answers that I had heard plenty of times before.

Vince love his love.

You were we to define that.

How could we be the ones that decide who loves who?

And I was preparing myself to answer some of those responses, but something seemed to be missing.

There seemed to be a little bit more to the story.

And so I asked him, is there more to it than that?

It's okay if not, but I just want to be sure that I'm listening well.

And that's when everything changed.

He got really quiet.

His face got really serious.

There was something personal here.

And he told me about his friend that he had grown up with.

His friend grew up in a Catholic household.

The friend's parents were faithful practicing Catholics.

And as a friend grew up and got older, the friend told his parents that he had same sex attraction.

And the parents didn't just not take it well.

They didn't just disagree.

They pushed him away.

They disowned him.

They told him they didn't love him.

And as Eric told me this story, I could hear it.

I could see it.

It wasn't just frustration.

It was pain.

It was anger.

It was sadness.

And he looked at me as he finished the story.

And he said, if that's how the church treats people, I can't agree with this teacher.

I didn't have a quick answer.

I sat there for a moment, solemn and serious.

And finally I said, yeah, that's not what a Christian's supposed to do.

That's not what the church teaches about love or marriage.

Being a parent, I don't agree with what they did.

And I could see what I said resonated.

It landed.

But then I kept talking.

I started trying to explain what the church believed.

And what the church taught.

I tried to clarify and defend.

I tried to fix his understanding of the church.

And the more I talked, the more defensive Eric got.

His posture changed.

His face got more serious.

I could tell he kind of stopped listening.

I blew it.

I could tell lunch was needing to be done.

So we wrapped up.

And I asked him if maybe we could revisit this in a few days.

And he nodded and thanked me for lunch.

And we went our separate ways.

A few days later, I saw him at the Catholic Center.

And I could tell he was frustrated with me.

I was standing in the way of him leading a Bible city.

A Bible city that I kind of indicated he would be a good to lead.

I was the one blocking him.

I approached him at the Catholic Center and I said, hey,

what if we tried something different?

What if for 30 days, one month?

You spent time in the chapel every single day

in front of Jesus in the Eucharist.

Give me 30 minutes every day with Jesus.

And I want you to read scripture and talk to him.

But I also want you to ask him the question.

Jesus, what do you say about marriage?

What do you say about my friend?

And I said, if you've done this every day for a month

and nothing changes, I'll help you lead that Bible city.

I'll help you get it started.

I couldn't tell if he felt like he was trapped or not,

but he agreed to pray every day.

And we shook hands and walked away.

And the next day, I saw him in the chapel.

And then the day after that, and the day after that,

and the week after that, he was following through.

He was doing it.

And he wouldn't bring up anything with me.

I offered a couple of times gently,

but he clearly was trying to abide by the conditions I had set.

And a little over two weeks into his time, praying every day,

we bumped into each other at a coffee shop.

And he came up to me and he said,

I've actually been wanting to run into you,

and I was about to text you.

Last time, instead of having a posture of frustration

or resentment, there was something different.

He was calm, confident, open.

He looked at me and he said,

I've been praying every single day.

And I can't explain it, but I know I'm not right.

I don't understand all of the teachings.

I don't understand what's going on exactly,

but I know that I'm not right.

And I want to learn.

I brought such a big smile to my face.

So we started meeting regularly.

I started teaching him how to lead a Bible study.

I started teaching him more about why the church views things

the way she does and the places where he can look to find

that trusting resource about the church.

And he was growing really regularly.

He was perfect and wasn't always at once, but it was regular.

A little bit more than a month after his first lunch

we had at Wendy's, where he asked to lead a Bible study.

He started a Bible study.

Looking back, all of this didn't start with an answer.

It started with a question.

In a moment where I almost lost him.

Thank you so much, Vince, for sharing that story with us today.

Eric wasn't changed by the right answer.

And that fact straightens out to me because Vince

was articulate and understanding and even listening to

the initial experience and not just immediately moving the answer.

So he did all the right things.

But what seems so true about our faith that in this story today

we're going to witness is that when the invitation came

to prayer, that's what began to change Eric's heart.

This time before our Lord really seeking His presence,

really opening Himself up to the power of prayer,

is what began to open His heart to what the Lord had for Him

in the church and in the teachings of the church.

And I think it's a good lesson and a reminder for us.

How often are we quick to try to give answers?

Which again, we should do and we should have a defense for, you know,

the faith that we've been given.

But how infrequently, if you're like me, the invitation

is to invite someone to bring something to God.

If there is a teaching that you struggle with

or maybe you have a friend who struggles with,

I think we could be well to do like Vince did,

to give an answer to receive well,

but ultimately to invite them to bring that thing before the Lord Himself.

Thanks so much for listening.

I hope to see you next week.