Ghostly Moments (Compilation)

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Bob, do you have ghosts in front of you?

In front of me?

Is there a window in front of you or something?

Are you referring to this?

Yeah, I saw a shadowy figure.

What is?

What is going?

It looks like a window and someone's walking by it.

What is that?

I'm in a basement.

Let's be very clear about this.

I'm in a basement.

This is a TV that's off that is reflective,

but what it usually reflects is my monitors.

And I just saw that.

Yeah, you saw that to someone walked by.

You could see my hand in the monitor, right?

You could see right here when I...

Yeah, our angle I can't, but I believe you.

I swear, something walked by.

I saw that because you made me look at it right with that.

It looked like what was that?

What is that?

What is that?

What?

I saw it.

What is it?

I'm in a basement.

You got ghosts, man.

What's happening?

My monitors are all static,

except for your images right now.

Good luck putting that in a YouTube short editor's.

Man, Bob, if this is a prank, it's a good one.

Dude, there's a prank, I'm pranking my own self here too.

What the fuck is happening?

Hey, I'll give you 20 bucks to stare in front of this light

while I'm recording an episode and just walk back and forth.

I'm in a basement.

There are, like, basement windows,

but there's no way that they reflect...

That's what's reflecting,

because they're covered by horizontal slats.

It keeps happening.

Man, it didn't mean to derail your episode, but...

Yeah.

No fucking idea what that...

Well, what's reflecting right now in that top part?

Like, what is that green line?

I don't know.

Watch right here, right?

You can see my hand shadow right there.

That's my hand in front of my monitors.

What is up?

Wait, I can obstruct that.

Yeah.

It's a...

I don't have an explanation for that.

I think there's someone hiding behind your monitor.

I think that's the only thing.

The only other thing in my office that emits light

is I have a...

Over there, a pie.

I have a computer,

but it's purple.

It's all purple lighting inside my computer.

It's not green.

All the listeners are shaking their steering wheel.

Listeners, there's a TV

that looks like someone's moving in front of a reflection in it.

There you go, you're welcome.

It honestly looks like someone is walking back and forth

in front of the reflection.

I'm alone in a basement.

I don't know what to tell you.

Are you?

Okay, I hope so.

I don't know.

Oh, they walked the other way.

It did go the other way.

I saw that.

If a face appears and stays there,

maybe we'll talk to it.

Maybe that'll be the episode.

I don't like that.

I don't like that.

Oh, this is not a big thing, but it's preparation.

Okay, so the day the mountains fall,

I want you all to close your eyes, okay?

Imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine, imagine.

I went searching for the truth

and like a fool I found it,

but some truths are best left undiscovered.

Well, I turned around and there was a spider that I could imagine.

The hikers claim that when they turned around,

it seemed as though their friend had simply vanished.

When I turned around, my whole farm was going,

hold on, let me go.

When I turned around, I couldn't miss that.

What would I ever see?

This is morbid mysteries of the missing millennium.

Viewer discretion is advised.

If I swallow this right now and die,

will you give me the point?

That's at worth at least two points.

I guess, yeah.

Everyone pull over to the side of the road.

You got to watch this one.

Gulp, I'm dead.

That's two points to mark, I guess.

Jesus, I'm getting railroaded here, man.

Well, thankfully, he can't compete for any more points now, right?

If he comes back to life, he loses the two points just to be clear.

Okay.

Anyway, interesting discussion, I think.

Hey, what's up, guys?

Back from the afterlife here.

We want to finish this episode out strong.

I'm going to cross out dead and take those two points away real quick.

Can I get one point?

I'm a ghost, man.

All right, I'll give you one ghost point.

Okay, cool.

You hear my echo, you voice and everything.

I don't do any of this.

Just make him live with what he's done.

No, please.

I sign your checks.

That's not even true.

None of us sign shit.

You're right, but I could call the person who does.

I know them too.

I have their number two.

I'll call them and tell them not to listen to Mark.

You don't even worry about it.

All right, fine.

We have to talk about a very important topic.

I want you to use science.

I want you to use mysticism.

I want you to use personal beliefs,

regardless of facts shown to you.

I want you to use whatever methods necessary

for you to discuss the important topic of

our ghost's real.

No, final answer.

All right, episode over.

All right, thank you, everybody.

Mark wins because he answered first.

Thank you for listening to the podcast.

Make sure that you watch it on Spotify.

No, well, so we can talk about this

from several different perspectives.

Thing number one that I have that I enjoy

is ghost hunting, both the TV shows

that exist around ghost hunting

and the actual devices that you use

to go ghost hunting like EMF readers

and talk boxes or whatever they're called

and all the different little tools

that you use to try and detect the presence of ghost.

All that stuff is very entertaining

and hilarious and bunk.

Do you guys believe in any of that stuff

that it works, that it means anything?

No, those shows know it is interesting

that they would believe that it does

because even if you watch this of the show,

the EMF thing with like the radio

where it cycles through and it grabs

so like it'll be like a word came through

and I'm like, yeah, you're going through radio signal,

the spirit box, the spirit box.

EMF's the little light that was like

electromagnetic field detector.

Yeah, but it's just so funny to me

because it's like, yeah, this thing,

what it does is it cycles through

the radio frequencies that are passing through.

Yeah, it picks up words that are broadcast

into this realm.

But what happens whenever you ask

at a question like, what do you want

and you hear Apple?

And it's like, clearly the ghost wants an Apple.

And you hear my hips laugh.

And it's like, oh, Darren's Lauren, I heard that.

It's, I used to watch those ghost hunting shows

quite a bit, they're very funny.

They're so entertaining.

They're edited in a way

that just never gets to a conclusion ever.

And it's like straight through the,

like it goes up to the commercial break.

It doesn't, it's not even a cliffhanger,

it's just a constantly building like,

and then this happened.

They circle back to the same clip of like a little dot

going through with a circle on it.

And then the circle's bigger.

And then it closer to the circle.

And it's like, that can stretch that up for 10 minutes.

And the sound, dude, the sound stingers they use.

Oh my god.

It's a black and white infrared shot of a door

that's already open that just goes,

Buh, burr.

T, T, T, T, T, T, T, T.

It's like, and then I saw that the door was open

show the clip again.

Goose, goose, goose.

And I don't remember opening the door.

Put the door in the door.

And they put in this squeak sound effect.

Yeah, I love those shows.

Like, no, and it's like a dainty cook joke too.

Some of those two, they'll, they'll be in a room

and they'll, the door will move

or whatever thing falls over.

And they're like, Gary, Gary was downstairs.

Gary, come up here.

Gary's got the EMF.

Gary, come up here a minute and a half ago.

Did you get anything?

Well, yeah, no, I got like a three,

like a three out of five on this

rater thing.

Why did something happen up here?

Oh, you got a three out of five.

Goose.

It's like, it's like, they're all through the house

and it's like, I was, I was in the basement

using the dividing rods.

You were in the upstairs with the dolls.

I don't know why because it's also painfully boring

because you just know, you watch a show,

you know the formula and you're like,

after the commercial, they're just going to come back

and circle back to that one thing that happened.

But I have to see it because I want to see the market

so excited about it.

All right, so this has happened a couple times in my life.

But specifically last night, we were in a hotel.

We just got back from traveling today.

Last night at like 11.30 p.m.

isn't too late, but we have a baby.

So he was already asleep for a couple hours at this point.

At 11.30 p.m., some like kids,

some like middle school kids were staying in the hotel, I think.

But they just slammed our door.

Like we were staying in a hotel.

The door was locked with all the extra security locks.

And we're just sitting,

many and I were sort of laying in bed,

like talking kind of falling asleep.

And it was just like,

you're like, I heard feet footsteps running away, right?

Like I know that a human did it.

But that should have happened to be multiple times.

How many people slammed doors in hotels?

All right, just really unlucky.

That's never happened to me.

It was scary.

I've had noisy people in a hotel.

I think they've ever slammed into my door.

The box is waving at us, everybody.

Hi, box.

As horrifying, what is happening to that box?

Hi, box.

Hi, okay, you stay back there.

Don't talk to me while we're recording.

Unless that'd be great footage.

I don't like that.

Mandy's actually just off screen right now just doing that.

At some point, she's just going to lurch out and tackle me.

Okay, so, um, hi.

Welcome to distraction.

I assume that he has started already.

When did we start?

The haunted box really threw me.

We're not going to talk about why that's doing that.

If you're watching this on Spotify,

you're seeing it, but you're seeing it.

And like, just, you got to really squint

and hold your phone really close up to your face.

Yeah, it's probably small on your phone.

It's fine.

Time.

Don't worry about it.

Totally fine.

Will won't zoom in on that or anything at any point.

It's just not a big deal.

You were right.

Thank you for admitting it.

I thought that we were just having a goof.

And it was just a joke for an episode.

Our new house is haunted.

Oh, our new house.

So my Mandy's parents live 20 minutes away

from our new house, right?

So we're, it's in Ohio.

We still, we're still in California right now.

So they're like watching the place, right?

They go over there.

The new house is haunted.

The new, the new house we don't live in yet

is already haunted.

They go over there and they like make sure everything's good,

make sure, you know, whatever.

Make, they just check on the house just to make sure.

And so this is the garage.

Let's get a show on my phone while that's hideous.

There we go.

This is like a hatch like into the attic of the garage, right?

Yeah, they went over there one day

and they sent us, they like panic

send us some text messages and we're like,

something, something moved in the house.

We think someone's been in the house.

I can't, we can't tell.

It's weird.

It doesn't seem like any, no, there's no breaking.

But look, look, they sent that

like a week ago, maybe, or a while ago now.

And on that day, they sent that and we were like,

whoa, what the hell?

Did the previous owners like leave something

in the attic in the garage and they came back

and broke into the house?

Like they had a key or something and got in?

Or like we don't know, like what happened?

But for those listening at home.

Sorry, listeners.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, good idea, Mark.

I wouldn't even tell them.

The first picture was like, you know,

it's an attic access.

So you push up on it and it slides.

It's just a big piece of wood.

And then you climb in the hole into the attic.

The first picture was closed and sealed.

The second picture was slightly a skew with gaps

where I could see the darkness beyond.

But it looks like, so I correct me if I'm wrong,

it looks like in order to move it,

you have to lift up and twist it.

This isn't just a panel that like can shift on it.

So it needs to be pushed up, right?

It's supposed to be set into a thing

where you push up and it goes into the attic, yes.

So it looks like my first thought was okay,

a raccoon or something.

But a raccoon's getting across,

it wouldn't lift it up necessarily,

unless they dug at it.

Right.

And there is a ladder in the garage,

according to our parents,

they left a ladder or something.

I think they went back to the house today.

It's the same hatch.

More tilted open.

Oh, did they reset it when they saw it last time?

No, so this is on the ceiling

of like a pretty high garage, right?

The garage is like 12 foot,

it's like a tall garage door.

So they couldn't reach it

and they're not trying to climb up on a ladder

or something, they just, so they left it

from the, they left it in this condition here

where it's very slightly tilted open.

That was like a week ago,

we wish, that was a while ago.

They went back today and it's open

by like a few more inches.

It's way more open.

Your reflections are showing in my phone.

Hey guys, how's it going?

Hey, I can see the latency.

So the house is haunted, you bastards.

That's haunted, that is haunted.

It doesn't look light, it looks like it's got some weight to it.

No, it's like made of wood,

it's got a metal like around the edge

of metal for like the seal.

Got a handle on it, it looks like it would,

it wouldn't be like hard to open,

but you would have to climb up a ladder

and like, and move it out of the way

to get into the attic.

That thing's gonna be out and following

and breaking on the floor soon.

So it's either a ghost or someone lives in that attic.

I thought, that's what I thought it was, if I'm honest.

I thought they sold the house

and didn't tell a Crenfield,

the guy who lives in the attic.

And then like, he came out for his monthly trip

to the grocery store, it was like, guys?

Oh no, oh god, they forgot about Crenfield.

So fourth of July, I went over to my mom's

and my family came over and we had a little get together

for fourth of July.

And we had a weird event where we were sitting around talking

and one of my mom and sister's dogs

went and was chewing on, they grow like their own herbs

and vegetables and stuff in their backyard.

And the dog went and started chewing on one of those.

And mid-sentence, we were talking to my mom and my sister.

My mom just starts yelling,

jalapeno, jalapeno, jalapeno.

And we're like, okay.

We were talking about like, camera's mom,

what the hell, what just happened?

And she's like, well, it's hot.

And it's like, excuse me?

It's what we yelled to the dogs to get them to stop eating

stuff they're not supposed to because jalapenos are hot.

And I was like, you trained them on a jalapeno,

a four syllable word to sell them to stop or hot.

And they're like, well, no, we didn't train them.

So why do you yell jalapeno?

Is the dog knows jalapenos are spicy

and the dogs don't like spicy food?

But the dog doesn't know jalapeno.

It's just as fucking shocked as we are that my mom

goes from talking calmly and normally

to screaming jalapeno like she's being murdered

in the backyard.

We trained our dog to react to me screaming nonsense words

out of nowhere, very hysterically.

It always works because it's just so shocking.

Mom would be like, oh, yeah, that's cool.

jalapeno, jalapeno.

And I thought she was being possessed by a demon

because do we do an episode since I went ghost hunting?

No, no.

When you went ghost hunting?

Yeah, I did.

I did go ghost hunting.

I don't know if that video will be out yet.

We're actually waiting on a cameo from an expert

in the field that fully edit the video.

Look forward to that.

But I went ghost hunting down at Bob Mackeys,

which is a new port Kentucky.

It's like a bar that has a history of like being owned

by the mob and people being interrogated

in the basement and other such events.

We went down there and filmed some stuff

and nobody would do the Ouija board with me,

except for D-Live.

Everybody was afraid, like even non-believers

were like, ah, Ouija board, which I don't get it.

What is so special about a Ouija, like you'll get

a spirit box, you'll be like, ghost, show yourself.

Give me pinch me, suck my balls, ghost.

Punch me, ghost.

But if you touch a Ouija board, you're like,

what is your name?

They're like, oh, don't ask that.

Not on a Ouija board.

And the Ouija board's like,

this fucking Parker brothers on the bottom.

So it's a goddamn kids toy.

But for some reason, it's the scariest ghost hunting device

and I don't understand it.

It's because they're real, Wade.

Okay, the rest of that stuff is technological,

Google Gobble.

Ouija boards are made of wood and like plastic and glass

and whatever, and it's just real.

It's just the spirit's reaching out

and sending you a message, okay?

People are walking around with their holy water,

their cameras, their EMF readers,

all the other devices and they're like, ghost, pinch me.

Throw a table at me, do something.

And I'm like, what year were you born?

They're like, oh, you're fucking fool.

That's a Ouija board.

So we wrap up and we're coming home and I was like,

hey, can you guys carry this out?

I was like packing up equipment.

I was like, trying to get someone to carry the Ouija board.

No one would touch it.

My sister went, Wade does and she was like,

I'm not taking that back home with me

because it was their Ouija board.

She's like, you can have it.

So I brought the Ouija board back

and now I own a Ouija board

that everyone thinks is possessed by a demon.

And when my mom started fucking screaming Hallopino,

I was like, oh my God, they were right.

She possessed.

You look over at the window

and the Ouija board is pressed up against the window

and the thing is just frantically pointing it, yes.

The Ouija board is all, yes, yes, yes.

Yeah, but that was the only thing

that could possibly have explained Hallopino

until she was told me what that was going on.

But ghost hunting, man, is it more expensive than I thought?

And it's like four or five hours

of being in a fairly uncomfortable building,

uncomfortably with not much happening.

Maybe it's because you got a cheap Parker brothers one

and not an actual authentic.

I thought that was authentic.

Is there a brand of authentic Ouija board?

Real Ouija boards are hand-cuned

by Montsu or Ouija himself, obviously.

They only come from the Ouija part of France.

Yeah, Erro knows that.

You are using a sparkling board.

That joke really led it.

It's the same board that we used for Drown Man.

Oh, well, then you know it works.

Yeah, that's extra cursed.

So you're gonna burn that house down

now that you moved into the new one?

The fiery man!

I don't want to be the fiery man,

please don't wish that upon me.

Yeah, no, no, no.

What's other disastrous, funniest?

What's disaster would be funniest to befall you?

The gas leak, man!

Dude, I just had propane work done.

Don't wish that upon me.

The carbon monoxide poisoning, man!

The bad grating, man!

All the water's gonna drain right up against your foundation.

Oh, your basement's gonna be so moist!

The sinkhole, man!

Ooh, that sounds stature.

No, oh, the other ones are safe.

Yeah, probably, I don't know.

I don't like any of this shit for the record.

You know what's gonna be cursed is your car.

You ever get a car?

That's where it's gonna be.

Well, I've beat them to the punch

if you don't have when they can't curse.

Oh, semi-man.

The crushed man.

The crushed.

The crushed man.

Well, that sounds violent.

Oh, yeah, the fired man sounds so less violent.

Well, you can run away from a fire if you're crushed.

What are you gonna do, uncrush yourself?

I don't know.

Yeah, all the people that have died in fire

they just didn't run fast enough.

Yeah, 80 hits.

Obviously, you just run away from it.

Fire can't be that fast.

Billy, silly.

I have something I want to play for you.

Have you ever felt the chill up your spine?

I don't know, man.

Something just feels off.

Like you know there's something standing right behind you.

But you just can't turn around.

Cut it out, man.

You're giving me the creeps.

What if I told you that the world was stranger

than you could ever possibly imagine?

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

I don't believe it goes.

But something just feels weird.

Welcome to unusual oddities of an unreal understanding.

New show oddities of an unreal understanding.

I enjoy the reference back to turning around and ghost.

View discretion is advised.

Of course.

People of you would interrupt that.

I play so much work into that and you just interrupted?

Yes.

Interrupt the 15-second interlude in that song?

Well, cut him out.

Yeah, yeah, cut him out of there.

No, Amy was literally like, oh, I got that gap.

They're going to start talking and they're going to think it's over.

Well, yeah, there isn't necessarily a long pause.

That pause.

That whole is 50 seconds long.

I don't know why in that song.

I made that literally in between the break.

I told you I was going to get food.

I skipped food to make that.

I don't know, man.

You're giving me the creeps.

You're like a swix, man.

Oh, my God, they never miss.

Mark, how would it have such a skill you possessed?

They literally all bangers.

I don't understand.

I don't believe in ghosts.

It cards on the table.

I found this in a cracked article titled,

The Seven Most Ridiculous Ghost Stories from Around the World.

And I read it passively while I was brainstorming ideas for this episode.

But I came across this ghost and I had to tell you all about the hauntute to tech.

So just to give you the background, the legend has it.

The hauntute to tech is a female spirit apparition ghost,

some say a witch, a bolognese witch, with an unimaginably enormous rack.

And this ghost's purpose is only to float around and smother disobedient young men

to death with her shocking bazooms.

Guys might hear that and be like, all right, if I have to die.

This is not like some anime fantasy girl is going to show up and come fulfill all your dreams or whatever.

Hauntute hot techs are described in a lot of ways.

Generally, they're described as being very large or extremely obese,

to crept it looking like deathly old woman sort of look.

But the real absolute banger of all of this is the hilariously large fun bags

are in the spookiest location, not in the front where regular boobs go.

They're located on the ghost's back.

No.

Yes, the spookiest place to have boobs, obviously.

That's terrifying.

Back boobs sound kind of nice to me.

But anyway, this ghost comes from Malaysian culture and actually recently had quite the stir-up.

In February of 2021, had quite the come up on Twitter,

the account at Bunganberry, I have no idea what inspired this person to do this,

but they posted some sketches of what they thought this ghost looked like.

And Twitter couldn't decide if they were going to be horny about it or terrified about it.

And they basically went with both.

A lot of the responses were due to just being like,

oh, how am I summit a little hotute tech?

Yeah, I want some of this in my life.

And a lot of them were like, I would not mess with this ghost.

That's not terrifying.

Is it really actually going to be able to physically interact with you?

It seems to suggest it might be some sort of poltergeist instead of just a ghost.

Yeah, I mean, the descriptions are vague.

This is an old, it comes from Malaysia.

I am not in Malaysia, I don't know if you can tell.

From my appearance or all the information you know about me.

But it's hard to find a lot online.

I'll show you all of the links I found online.

I will put in the discord so you can look.

Who knows how it uses the boobs to suffocate you?

I don't want to find out.

Being crushed to death is not a poltergeist tribute.

Okay, never mind.

I would deduct points from you.

We all going to go some time, man.

If you're going to go, you might as well enjoy it.

No, that's the exact logic that the stupid people are getting.

You're getting crushed to death.

This doesn't matter if it's between backmams or five minutes.

I survived 2020, maybe I'll survive the back boobs too.

You never know.

I just like, I don't get how that's an appealing death.

What is an appealing death?

You're getting smushed between humongo and moobloos.

So I will say, you guys, I don't know what pictures

you've looked up exactly.

Oh, let me find the one.

This website has some good imagery that really might swing

your opinion about it's not an English.

And I couldn't get it to translate.

It's from the way back machine.

But there are some images that I feel like

might really swing your opinion about whether or not

you want to get a smothered to death

by those big old headlights.

The top ones, a little more childish, a little cartoony.

But if you get to the bottom there,

you really get more to the meat of what I think a haunt you

to tech looks like.

Because anime has taught us that boobs grow

as like spheres on there.

Perfectly spherical.

We all know this.

Not how boobs work.

I had to break it to you.

I've never seen anything quite like that though.

They really are like scarves or like snakes even.

If you see, the problem is like I disagree fundamentally

that bigger is always better when it comes to boobs.

Like, and to be perfectly honest, I shouldn't just be making

big declaratives about judgment of boobs in general.

I agree with your disagreement.

I think that any size can be very nice.

I'm gonna get myself in trouble, man.

I'm a married man.

Well, I didn't say bigger, bigger may not be better,

but I didn't say bigger was worse, you know what I mean?

I agree.

I don't, I think it, each titty deserves to be judged

on its own merits.

Yeah.

Well, the tittys have to be judged.

Why are you judging?

Yeah, why are they getting judged?

They're, it's like a, they're always positive,

just fuck, fuck, I'm in trouble.

Go ahead.

But yeah, look, so this is an interesting topic.

It stirs a lot of different emotions about general

horniness, general discussion of like death,

but death in a way that's sort of comical,

but like, does that make it better?

The thing that I find really messed up about this saggy

specter, gotta work in my name.

Nice, nice.

At least to some extent, it comes, for my understanding,

it comes from parents using this to scare their young male

children into behaving themselves.

This isn't just like some go, like I could totally imagine

someone creative coming up with this character,

some adult or whatever.

Someone over, you know, teenager, older coming up with this

and be like, ah, big tits and stuff.

It's a scary, funny ghost.

This was used by adults to influence children.

And like, I was a young boy once, right?

And if my parents had described the giggity ghost to me

as being very old and grotesque and scary looking

with back boobies that was confusing,

I would probably be scared, but like, young boys

are really horny.

Yeah.

And I would definitely, at least,

have toyed around with the idea of like,

how much do I misbehave to just get a little threatening

smush without actually being smothered to death?

Like, where's the line?

Just get slapped with one tit, you know?

Like, it's a tough slap, but, you know,

it's more disciplinary.

I just put you a picture and discord of something

I found about the hunt to Tatek.

Oh, man.

Yeah, might lean a little more on the horse.

I know this.

That one, I definitely, you know,

that one would be one that would work.

It would work.

Yeah.

When it's 50% nipple and, yeah.

If you're listening at home, you can find maybe,

find this on the Distractable Podcast website,

either that or we will do a faithful recreation of it

or it won't exist at all.

That's what we don't need a special license to post it.

I don't know.

Yeah, exactly.

But yeah, no, that doesn't look good.

Sidebar, there's a whole discussion to be had of like,

the sexualization of breasts in general, you know,

the stigma behind it and all that stuff.

But for you guys, not even the nice pictures

do anything for me.

I don't look at this every picture and I'm like,

well, maybe if I saw this and I wasn't sure

it was just a person that needed help,

I would be running and screaming as fast

and as loud as I possibly could.

Yeah, I don't think this is exactly

what I would be fantasizing about ever.

I mean, I think you're right,

but also like your parents described this to you

or maybe you see it and I think I agree.

I would not see an image of any of these things

in real life and be like, yeah, let's see where this goes.

All right, this is my last one, but I gotta work it in.

I would come upon this flabbergasted phantasm.

That's another point, man, that's another point, yeah.

And I would be absolutely shocked and running

like you're describing.

But in my mind, like this is, you know,

it's kind of embarrassing to think about and admit,

but in my mind, I know I would have fantasies about this.

You can't throw something that like sexual

I mean, it's not sexual, but the boobs,

like at least in the culture I came up in,

boobs were sexual though,

and everything was like this weird,

I would twisted into a fantasy of like,

oh yeah, that's pretty hot actually, like, you know what?

That's how young boys minds work.

And maybe part of this is that Malaysian culture

is different.

Maybe boobs are not as sexualized by the culture.

Maybe it's a whole different thing.

Maybe this is terrifying and I just don't understand it.

It's possible.

But I just think that would have made it

some really messed up childhood like fantasies

and thought experiment.

It's just a weird angle to go for keeping your kids in line.

It's gotta be better ghosts and things to you

as to scare your kids into behaving right.

But wait, here are ready to pick it back up

and bring it back.

I'm looking at this like wheel of emotions

and they've got different colors associated with them.

The three main colors are like red, yellow and blue,

but red, yellow and blue are kind of

somewhat closer together.

And then they've got green across from red,

which is a little bit weird.

And for the life of me, I cannot figure out why in the world,

it's designed that way.

It's then having red, yellow and blue

equidistant from each other.

And I'm just curious why green gets like two shades

of green and a light blue.

But red and blue just have one peak between them.

Red and yellow just have one orange between them.

And I don't know why green gets so much love on this place.

You tried to distract me, is it?

Huh?

What do you mean?

What?

Oh, is that on the list?

That's crazy.

I've never been more focused on anything

in my entire life.

Are you kidding me?

Oh my god.

For those who weren't watching, for that moment,

there's no words I could describe.

Except yes, I have words to describe that.

Oh, sorry, my little weird paper towel ball.

Yeah, I'll try and describe it, Lister's Wade set

with his face barely in the shot.

And that's why he sounded so distant.

And then he was just waving a weird crumpled up paper towel

in and out of the other side of the shot.

The whole time he was talking about the colors.

Oh, man.

Mark said this was the best episode ever.

I had to give it my all to do.

I don't like to admit it to anyone,

but yes, I paid this man $60 to come to my house

so I could smell his fingers on my birthday.

Oh, did you?

Yes, three separate times I smelled this man's fingers.

Three times, that's the little strange.

And none of the times that his fingers smell like maple syrup.

They were bad.

It got away from bad to worse.

The mystery thickens.

You know, when there were only two pipes you rubbed on,

so I really, I honest, I swear to God,

I don't know what the third one was that I smelled,

but they were all bad.

I don't mean to say it,

but have you thought about a Canadian ghost?

Like, I hadn't.

There are a lot of Canadian ghost refugees in Ohio.

Are you, are you as your house

on a Canadian burial ground?

This is like, I just got to ask.

Yes, people do, they have their pilgrimage

from Canada to Cincinnati to bury their loved ones

where I live quite often.

I feel it.

I had an experience in Phasmaphobia the other day.

So Phasmaphobia, I did this new map and new game mode.

They had nightmare mode, a new map called the campsite.

And in the campsite, there's this campfire.

And sitting by the campfire is just like an acoustic guitar

laying against like one of the chairs.

And immediately all I could think of is like,

campfire guitar guy.

Don't wanna be campfire guitar guy.

Don't wanna be that one guy.

And something this ghost, what the ghost name was.

But one of the audio clues is to figure out where it was.

It randomly played the guitar.

Like it just strummed it.

So I heard the guitar play.

And I was like, you gotta be fucking kidding me.

We actually have a campfire guitar guy ghost.

And I jokingly said that it was a yokai.

And yokai's are the ghosts that get angry

and are more likely to hunt if you're talking

and using your microphone.

It can hear you and it gets more agitated

and more likely to hunt.

And I said that because I was like,

well, if there's one thing that campfire guitar guy doesn't

want to do is want people talking while they're trying

to steal the show and have all eyes on them.

And it ended up being a yokai.

But it made me think of that one guy, campfire guitar guy.

Not the point any fingers to anybody that I know,

but I do know a couple of campfire guitar guys

that carried around guitars or carry around guitars.

And not necessarily did it for the whole same reasons

as the stereotype.

But I definitely think of like, you know,

you watch a movie and there's a stereotypical guy

that, you know, people are sitting on the beach

and they're all having a fun conversation.

Someone's just like, oh, by the way,

we play Wonderwall for you

and they pull out their acoustic guitar out of nowhere

and everyone has to stop talking

and just put their eyes on campfire guitar guy

who was miraculously not wearing a shirt,

you know, hair drooped down to their shoulders,

muskily playing their guitar.

And everyone's just like, well,

we were talking and having a good time.

I guess we'll just stare at you now.

And I got that ghost in Phasmaphobia,

but that's another that one guy.

No, no campfire guitar guys.

I've never experienced that in real life ever.

No, you talk about campfire guitar guy way more

than anyone has ever experienced campfire guitar guy.

Because I know this is a thing that you tell

your campfire guitar guy talking about campfire guitar guy guy.

You literally mentioned campfire guitar guy.

He's playing E-turn.

I remember when I was trying to,

I was playing the guitar like for the tour

and I was like, yeah, I'm trying to improve

and better myself and you're like,

oh, here comes campfire guitar guy.

Was this guitar?

I think you just hate people that play guitar.

I might, maybe I can do.

I can't do.

Whoa.

Oh, Jesus, I shouldn't have put my desk up in standing,

but I was just fucking fell over.

Oh, my God.

This image is a guy with his hands up in fist form

with his chin resting, eyes closed,

and the fart genie is leaving his armpit.

Yeah, imagine the statue of the thinker.

Yeah.

The man is pulling a double thinker.

Why is he grabbing his head like that?

Once the make sure he doesn't look back here

and see what's going on, you know?

Keep that into your doing.

This guy's like, you don't want to see

what I'm about to do, bro.

Oh, wow.

I feel like this one's such a peculiar image.

It must be obvious.

It's the most trash bag like ghost I've ever seen.

It's like someone saw one of those online tutorials

like, all you need is some chicken wire and paper mache

and you can make a ghost decoration

for your front yard for Halloween

and then they tried to make it and they got this.

Maybe it's the angle,

but like the face of the ghost

does not look like it could possibly be this dude's face.

This gave me an idea

because I'm gonna get back into learning Korean

as soon as I'm done with this freaking movie.

These would be great for flashcards.

This would be great for flashcards for Korean.

Yeah.

Because for flashcards, what's really good

if you have image flashcards is getting images

that are memorable but also completely unique.

I don't think that there's anything more unique than this.

And if you can even relate,

even somehow relate it to a word or a sentence.

That would be very good for that.

All right, I'm gonna,

I'm gonna play as you tell me if you hear it.

Isn't something smell awful to you?

It's too loud?

It's a little loud, but yeah, I do hear it.

I don't know, sorry.

Back up, pretend you didn't hear that.

All right, here we go.

Ready?

Are you ready?

No, don't do it again.

Isn't something smell awful to you?

Hey, do you smell something?

Well, that's a weird smell.

I don't know what it is.

Have you ever felt the chill run up your spine?

It was like something sat me on the shoulder,

but when I turned around,

get ready to forget everything you know about everything.

Guys, I'm still smelling something weird.

A whole city of people just turning,

round and round, I just can't hear it.

If someone doesn't say they're smelling,

I'm smelling, I swear, I'm, oh my god.

What happened to the moon?

You expect me to believe we're surrounded by gases

that we cannot see.

I know what clouds look like.

These are clouds.

Welcome to the show that was formally known

as Don't Look Up, but we were sued

by Song Domass in a movie studio.

This is It's In The Air.

Viewer discretion is advised.

So when I told you I was late because I was working on it, it's so good, sorry it was so

loud I tried to do a hack to get it to play for you, for sure.

Mark was late to recording today because he was working on this, I think I'm understanding

why iron lungs taking a lot damn look guys I'm not going to lie, he spent three days on

this, so I'm not going to lie, I spent so long working on this this morning, I didn't

come up with an idea for the episode, I didn't this because I was like I'm going to bring

it to the small thing during small talking, this will be a funny way to do it because I

haven't done one this a while and I had a bunch of problems with the software because I haven't

done it on this computer in a while and so I had to, I had to reinstall DaVinci and all my

software, so anyway did you, that admission actually gave me a headache, my brain could

not comprehend, you'll never guess what I'm googling right now, do you want to figure

out what gravity is, what is this, he's like apparition, welcome to the first sushi restaurant

in space, you won't have no gravity here, you'll be eating your sushi flowing through

the air, I got the ghost of, say to Takahashi, here a real dead apparition to cook you

your sushi, not a lot of cook can go on, mostly just cut it up, but he's good for a ghost

and you're going to be good for paying money for this fish, it gets sent up with a catapult

in space, flash frozen in an instant, right into our back door, he gets sushi from the

water to your mouth, all in the first sushi restaurant in space, come with your friends,

you'll never leave, teacher stick and action, are you tired of ghosts in your kitchen, trying

to be dinner but they're on a mission, if you and your friends what piece like we do,

we got a trier new ghost trap, we're ready to assist you, do you have apparitions in

your kitchen causing you quite a stir, well we have the new apparition trap ready for you,

it uses a gravity based system that lures them in and we have learned a very unusual secret

that ghosts are attracted to dead fish, therefore we use sushi as a bait, we place it on the

trap, the ghosts fly over, grab the sushi, the gravity well sucks them in and they're put

in the trap, bringing you peace and you don't have to leave the dinner table to catch them

and you can enjoy your meal, call us today, who were the people on the side, you don't

know that reference, what does no one here know references, that was the ghost busters

that was the ghost busters, when they're on the TV, they're commercial, we're ready to

believe you, I don't think I've ever actually seen ghost busters, what, I have to do the rest

of this episode in this call, oh, it's broken closet, alright, this is my curse, bye, no,

no, no, no, people in the closet aren't cursed, that's not how that works, oh my god, he's

going exactly, we know, hold on, actually, I don't have object permanence, I'm scared,

oh, that gave me chills, I'm like, where did you fucking go, what the fuck is that?

Mark, I need a borrow on your tape, no, oh my god, you can have it, Jesus Christ, where

did he go, oh, no, my god, it was a ghost hand, this is why we're the top 50, in the top

50 of best podcast in the world, this right here is why, are we still there, are we still

top 50, oh yeah, oh yeah, I'll take the win, what's happening in everyone else's locations

today, what, he's just leaving, I heard what sounded like someone crawling on all fours

down my hallway, that's such a specific sound, how would you know that sound, it's like

a slighty slappy noise, slighty slappy, I might be about to get some arid, well I'm

going to keep the recording rolling then, I don't want to leave the camera, theory, theory,

I'm scared of everything, it's because I have a phantasia, I can't imagine what anything

looks like, so while I'm experiencing things, as soon as I have it in my head, it's like,

oh, there's a ghost, but then in my head, I'm like, what, what, what does a ghost look

like, which one's a ghost, what's it, and then in real life, my body is like, oh, we

don't know, it could be anything, because I don't know what it is, it's just a feel

and the feeling is fear, that's interesting, it's interesting, thought though, if everything's

always unknown to you, because you can't picture it, what does it go smell like, I imagine

bad, but it's hard to say.

In an age where digital content reigns supreme, mysterious audio series emerges, captivating

minds with dense, enigmatic themes and challenging narratives, but behind the allure lies a shadow

organization with a hidden agenda, as listeners become unwitting participants in a clandestine

experiment, ethical boundaries or shatters in lives are irrevocably altered, unbeknownst

to them, select individuals who are identified for their psychic potential, drawn into advanced

studies from which some never return.

As desperate families and anonymous insiders come forward, the question arises, how did

a seemingly innocuous form of entertainment become a conduit for something so dark and

dangerous?

Well, it all lies in the person at the center of these events, the eye of the storm that

is the whirlpool of darkness and dismay.

I would like to start with some quotes that pertain to the event from people that were

affected directly.

Quote from Sarah Williams, I was a regular listener of Distractable, but things changed when

they sent me a cryptic email after I submitted my reactions to one of their special episodes.

It was as if they were probing not just for my opinions, but for something deeper, something

inexplicable.

I didn't sign them to be a lab rat's way I'm subscribed, still it makes you wonder what

they're really after.

I said after I responded to a prompt in a Distractable episode, they sent me an invite

for what they called Phase 2.

I was curious so I agreed the next episode was different, intense, disorienting, seemingly

spinning off in random circles, covering topics they already talked about weeks, sometimes

years before.

I had nightmares, and then I started seeing things, shadows, flashes of images that weren't

there.

Whatever they were doing, it's not just a podcast anymore, something darker, and I want

no part of it.

At the core of all this is one man, one man, above all else.

Bob Meisken's host of the popular podcast Distractable is in fact a cover for a sinister

government operation known as Project Distraction.

The podcast, Bob seems to talk about random, unrelated topics, but in reality, he's suddenly

planting seeds of doubt and distrust in the minds of his listeners.

It's all a psychological experiment, aimed with identifying potential recruits for the

organization.

I'm here to expose a truth about a way, would you like to contribute?

I've found some information that I've found to be very intriguing, that I don't know

about Mark if this corroborates what you've found, or if this is its own thing.

I've found evidence from, what was the name of the person you, did you say Sarah Williams?

Yes, Sarah Williams.

Okay, these are the same Sarah Williams or different Sarah Williams, that's also got information

from Sarah Williams.

It's all the same.

It's suggesting that there are either two, he's living a double life, or he has a twin,

he's never revealed.

While the well-known version of Bob My Skins is a well-known YouTuber and gaming content

creators primarily known for his gaming videos and collaboration with their content creators,

Sarah Williams, box of the same person, an entirely different set of circumstances, and

I actually have her testimony.

Sarah Williams is an investigative journalist with a passion for unraveling mysteries and

is an avid fan of My Skirm's gaming adventures and content.

She heard some rumors floating around, that there was a Robert My Skins, a scientist and

inventor, doing all kinds of, like, ungodly, horrible deeds, and the town of, let me see

what it was, Hicksalville.

He was known far and wide as My Skirm, a name that since shivers down the spines of those

who heard it.

My Skirm had a reputation for being a recluse, he resided in a grand, ancient mansion on

the outskirts of town, a mansion that seemed to hold secrets of centuries past.

Some said it was cursed while others believed it was filled with hidden treasures.

The town's focus was for tales of ghostly apparitions and unexplained phenomena surrounding

the mansion fueling the curiosity and fear of the locals.

One fateful day, a young and brave journalist, Sarah, arrived, determined to uncover the

truth about My Skirm's inner mansion.

She believed there was more to the story than the spooky legend circulating in the town.

Her journey was fraught with obstacles, including skeptical townsfolk who warned her to

stay away, but undeterred she persisted, researching old archives and interviewing those who

dared speak about My Skirm.

As she dealt deeper to the mystery she discovered that he had once been a renowned inventor and

scientist has mentioned how countless inventions many of which were years ahead of their time.

One evening, she wrote, as a storm raged outside, I ventured into the mansion to determine

to find the truth.

I uncovered hidden rooms filled with mesmerizing gadgets, intricate blueprints, and a journal

detailing Bob's life's work.

I realized that My Skirm had not been a recluse out of fear or malevolence, rather to protect

his revolutionary orate creations from falling into the wrong hand.

As I explored further, I encountered a holographic projection of Bob himself, and this hologram

he explained the adedicated life to advancing technology for the betterment of humanity.

He remained hidden to safeguard his inventions and ensure they would only be revealed

when the world was ready for their potential.

I asked, what about your public persona, your gaming content, your streamed, who is he

replied, oh, I'm not prepared to talk about that, for you see, that's not me.

As soon as it began, the hologram ended, leaving Sarah confused, wondering, did he meet where

there are two Bob's?

Was it one Bob?

Did he have a twin?

And such a lot is left to our imagination.

Yeah.

I've got to actually, I think I corroborate that perfectly because there's an anonymous

insider from the organization that this mysterious Bob was running that is trying to expose

the truth.

They said, quote, I worked, or I worked, or worked within the organization behind

distractable.

The public needs to understand that this isn't just an experiment.

It has real consequences.

People have disappeared and not just figuratively.

I can't reveal my identity for obvious reasons, but someone has to blow the whistle on this.

Don't engage with their special episodes.

Don't become another missing piece in their twisted puzzle.

What I think is happening is it's a consciousness upload program where they're trying to get

people to upload their consciousness and then use their corporeal forms as puppets, but

they can control the population.

So you think like the public persona version is forming an audience just to have sheep to

lead to the slaughter, so to speak?

Absolutely.

You upload the consciousness of the individual they can exist online, making content.

They've never seen them in real life.

It's pie-piper.

They're in the mall into the machine slaughter.

I feel like if we looked at certain points of Bob's career, we could probably pinpoint

the progress.

What he was uploading, how he was acting, where he was living, in different events that

were happening in those areas, I think there's a lot of dots to be connected.

And Sarah Williams is the key.

Yeah, I actually have another quote from Sarah Williams.

I think it's her last one.

So this is from a, this is a text transcription of an audio log that Sarah left behind on

her final exploration.

I've made it into a room that appears to be some sort of control center.

There are monitors displaying real-time analytics of listener engagement, biometric data, even

geolocation.

It's not just a podcast, the data collection operation on a massive scale, and there's

something else.

Files marked phase three.

I didn't open them, but the very existence is chilling.

This isn't just unethical.

It's organized, premeditated exploitation.

I've gathered as much evidence as I can and I'm getting out of here before I'm discovered.

What I've seen goes beyond mere speculation or conspiracy theory.

It's organized manipulation, with unknown, but clearly dangerous aims.

Whoever's behind this has resources, intelligence, and a complete disregard for ethical

boundaries.

Listen, if you're tuning into that podcast, or thinking about it, just stop.

Don't be another pawn in their game.

I'll do everything in my power to expose them, but for now, stay safe and stay skeptical.

People have disappeared, and the rest is just screaming.

I tried to look up what happened to her, and what I got with Sarah Williams, the intrepid

investigative journalist, had always been relentless in her pursuit of the truth, but when she got

too close to a shadowy conspiracy, she mysteriously vanished without a trace.

Being behind a trail of clues and a haunting question that's still lingers in the world

of journalism, kind of fits what her warning was all about.

Absolutely.

I think at the core of all this, we need to look more deeply into who this Robert is.

Agreed.

Also Bob points.

So listen, hey, folks, that's all we have time for today, the curious conspiracy corner.

We've explored some wild theories to wacky ideas, maybe even venture to a bit too close

to the edge of absurdity.

Remember, conspiracy theories are meant for entertainment purposes, not for taking seriously,

no, please don't go accuse anyone of secret syndicates or government activity or anything

without any evidence, which we did not present any today, because this was just for jokes

and stuff, and uh, yeah.

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