FULL SHOW: Calling for Bro Date, No Tip Hack Loser Line + Craziest Work Excuses (3/9/26)

0:00all cat parents understand the feeling of being totally ignored by your cat. And often thinking, does my cat even love me? There's only one solution to solve that, Shiba. Feature cat Shiba and go from feeling ignored to truly adored in 12 days guaranteed or your money back. Shiba has a menu of products, appetizers, entrees, treats, and even a kitten's menu. So Shiba has a product for even the pickiest eater, like Shiba Puree, made with bone broth, a smooth and creamy texture that cats love, or Shiba grilled. Protein rich formula made with real chicken and seafood. To learn more, check out Shiba.com. There's a difference between liking a house and actually getting it. Redfin is built to make up that difference and close the gap between finding and owning the home for you. Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. So when you find a home you love, you're not a step behind when it's time to make an offer. That means less watching great homes disappear and more focus on the one you'll call home. Redfin helps turn saved listings into real addresses, get started at redfin.com, own the dream.

1:00Growing up, I used to love movies like Bugs Life and Ants because they just made it seem like bugs where you're tiny little friends with good work ethic who go out on fun adventures and they fall in love. But then you grow up and you get your own home and spite your season happens. And suddenly your house feels less like a cute Pixar film and more like a creepy, crawly horror flick where they're invading your happy place. Well, you know what? It's time to reclaim your space and your sanity with the pest control experts at Pestee. Pestee gets rid of over 100 different types of bugs from spiders to ants to roaches and even scorpions. And Pestee's DIY 100% kid and pet friendly with a formula used in hospitals and schools around the country that help you come up with a customized plan specific to your living area, starting at just $35 per treatment. And best of all, Pestee comes with 100% guarantee. Your home will be bug free or your money back. Bugs hate to see you coming with Pestee so go to Pestee.com slash Brook and Jeffrey for an extra 10% off your order. That's P-E-S-T-I-E dot com slash Brook and Jeffrey

2:01for an extra 10% off. Military life isn't predictable, but earning your master's degree can be. With American Military University's 40 plus flexible online master's programs, you can stay mission ready while you get market ready. Learn anywhere, anytime, with an education built to keep pace, steady, reliable, and always accessible. Plus military service members, veterans and their families can save up to 45% on master's tuition with AMU special rates and grants. Learn more at amu.apus.edu. Steady through every mission. Winner is in full swing and a leave is here to keep you moving. When the cold weather sets in, everyday aches and pains can linger, but a leave's got your back. With up to 12 hours of body pain relief per dose, a leave keeps you going with long lasting body pain relief to get you through whatever the season brings. Chili days or cozy nights, a leave gives you that long lasting body pain relief. You can count on this winner. Try a leave uses directed for minor aches and pains. Oh, it's Alexis's favorite week. It's brick and Jeffrey in the morning.

3:03It's the week where you can blame any sort of lateness of posting our podcast on the time change. Yeah, you got it was just like an hour late because the world shifted by and I thought me. Yeah, no, all right, here we go. What do we offer comments before we start our full show? Yes, someone texted him from Chicago and said a couple of questions. Do you really get shocked? I hope not. Yes. In the shot collar. And it is true. It is a large dog shot color. Extra large dog shot collar. Extra large and another one. Does Brooke really leave the studio for Wim Brooks bucks? Yes. Also, yes. Every time. I am highly competitive and I would be very disappointed in myself if I cheated. Yeah. And I like you when you come out. Then we always get to the app and about something. Are you tell me what just went wrong in there? You're like, you won't believe what everyone just talked about. Because Alexis isn't in on that segment. No, I don't know why. We kicked you out from the beginning. I've never brought you back in. But it's OK, that's my Starbucks time. I guess that's when you guys play. All right, your brand new full hour starts right now. A lot of people say the most important things in life

4:05are your health, family, and friends. Yeah. Well, just there, Jeff. Well, all of those just took a back seat to the new number one thing Americans value. Fun experiences with your family and friends, right? Absolutely not. Broken Jeffrey in the morning. Because a new study found Americans at the moment are prioritizing experiences over everything else right now, including making money and avoiding debt. Yeah, I mean, you do the experiences to avoid any responsibility. Right. It is worth sending yourself into financial ruin if you can get one good memory out of it. Totally. And a good picture. Definitely. In fact, the TSA is predicting a 4% increase in spring break travel this year. That is why I'm playing. Because the flights are so expensive right now. I was just going to say that. Like things are crazy expensive. But the experience is worth it. We're talking 3 million airline travelers per day,

5:06which would make it the biggest spring break ever on record. So get to the airport six hours early. Is that what we're doing? Yes, because the more time that you spend in the airport, that's more experience that you're having. I didn't say good experience. No. It's just an experience for you. And apparently, we're not just chasing any type of experience. It's specifically warm weather experiences. Yeah, exactly. The Dominican Republic seen a big bump in visitors to the island this year, also the Bahamas. And the top Google search right now is has the cartel left Mexico yet. Oh, yes. We are so thirsty for a sunny getaway. You know what? That beach is going to be pretty empty. Oh, yeah. I want to take advantage of that. Definitely. It's not a bad idea. Life is short, so enjoy the chaos. Yeah. Just ask my pal with a shot collar over there. His name is Jake. Do you think he's doing this for money and paychecks? No. He's doing it for the cartel. For the cartel and the fun experience. I don't think we're pro cartel. Oh, my bad, Jake. Let's do it. We'll put that on you.

6:06Normally, if we ever do something on this show and Brooks says, wow, that was really fun. It's usually the kiss of death. And we put that idea in the vault to be locked away for years. Oh, fair. But there is one exception to that rule. And that's when we do boys versus girls, $100,000 pyramid addition of party up to 20. So many people came into my stream and said they loved it. We tried this a week ago. Got a little crazy in here. Some nasty things were said to me. And the ladies ended up winning by one point. Yeah, that happened. But it's a new day. It's a new month. There's new clues. And one person has a list of different march holidays. And they'll need to give their teammate clues to make them guess it without saying any of the words on the page. The random holiday. Girls will start us off. Alexis, here's your list. And we have to say National Blank Day. All right, Alexis, your time starts now. It goes with spaghetti. National meatball day.

7:07OK, it's a name, a really basic name. National John Day, National Jane Day, National. Jennifer Day. It's a thing in your body that you donate to people. Maybe you need a National Kidney Day. Yeah. You do this every weekend with your kids. National Sports Day, National Play Day. National Hiking Day, National Skin Day. You give it to someone on a birthday. National present day. Nope, National Cake Day. Yes. OK, we'll go back to the one we missed. It rhymes with rain, and it's a basic name. National Jane Day, National Pain Day. A guy named National, I don't know anybody named it, but it rhymes with rain, and it's a guy named Jane. Maine, Kane, National Kane Day, maybe it doesn't rhyme. What a guy named. I don't know what it is. It does rhyme. The last one they missed was National Shane Day. Oh, Shane. Oh, man. And I'm going to get ahead of this and say that the rhymes with a little thing Alexis did, he's not going to fly anymore. That's a classic rhyme rule. And that's your work. All right, Alexis, and Brooke, you have four points.

8:09And now, Jose, you're going to give the clues to Jeffrey. All right, Jose? Oh, my God. Your time. I'm just warning you, my brain isn't a terrible state this morning. Oh, we get the toys and make it excuses. That's all I hear. Jose, your time starts now. Breakfast meat. Sausage, National Sausage Day, National Bacon Day. OK, but a different country. National Canadian Bacon Day. Yes. It's on your head. It's one of your body parts on your head. National Hair Day. No, I can't point to it. Keep going. National... What are your body parts on your head? What's this on my head? Nothing on my head. I have a hat. Hand, show. OK, never mind my pants. Oh, a brown liquor. National Whiskey Day. Yes. Oh, probably one of the best things I'll subway to get. Oh, National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day. No, it's a reverse of the meat. It refers to the meat. National mayonnaise day. No, all right, we got a pass. National cheese day. No, you're right. No, go back to the other one. It's you and shining armor. National night and shining armor day. No, not the last thing with stuff.

9:09I'm sorry, I can't give you that. That was only two points there. What did I miss? What goes on your head? It's National Ear Day. Oh, I think those are on the side of my head, not on it. And National Cut's Day was the meat when it was on it. And then nine days. Just nine, I said nine. Oh, I said nine, two, four. You said nine, shine, shine, shine. Oh, I gave two good evidences. So I'm going to be punished for that. OK. As we go through round two, Alexis and Brooke have four points. Jose and Jeffrey have two. So the boys have some catching up to do. That's Brooke. Here is your list. OK. Please no boring boy names in this one. Brooke, it's your turn. Your time starts now. She's a toy. She wears pink national Barbie day. God, it is a shell fish. And you like to eat it. And it's not lobster. National crab day. Oh, I love using one of these after I have to clean my dishes. Now I'm not going to move on there. You're not going to see it. You're not going to see it.

10:10You're not going to see it. I use these to chew, but they're not real, but they're in my mouth. National dentures day. Right. But you have another dish. National retainer day? Well, yeah, but it's not true. It's national fake teeth day. Oh, did you do that? OK. And not daughters, but National Suns Day. Here you go. OK. There we go. Girls ate boys two. And I'm going to make this last round count for a double for the boys. I'm sorry, you're gender showing, Jay. So what's all your favorites? You knew you were going to get through this without Brooke yelling at you. Right. Come on, Jay. The nice ones right around the corner. It's 8-2. Jeffrey, here's your list. OK. Your time starts now. Well, now it's a guy's name. Oh, no. National shame day. It starts with that letter. National Scot day. What the hell? Oh, wow. You put this on top of your sandwich on top of the meats. National bread day. It's dairy. National mayonnaise? No. Dairy, national milk cheddar.

11:12I like judge not giving more of it to staring at them. Oh, this is how you learn English, where to put the commas and the periods and the spaces. National, I'll put it at the end of a sentence day. OK, moving on. You drink this. It has, it's from Russia, and it has vodka in it. Moscow Mule, National Moscow Mule Day. Oh, yeah. Oh, and this is you shake hands at the end of the game? National Good Sportsmanship Day. There it is. Wait a minute. 10 to 8. There's no controversy whatsoever. The boys win easily. Ah, that's it. That feels like society. Yes. Society proves once again that men are the superiors. The other that sucks is just that we get the shaft. Brooks never complained about getting the shaft before. But today, she's getting it and we'll be singing why I'm seeing it by the village people along with Alexis. Alexis, I printed the lyrics off for you. Thank you. Young man, there's no need to feel down. I said, young man.

12:14We're trying to jazz hands at parents. They're pretty. That was your shot-collar question of the day. Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. Welcome to Brook and Jeffrey Mythbusters. Oh, I love Mythbusters. Where we dive into what we thought were facts and dispel them, mostly with things that Brook believed were true. Oh, no. For example, is it a good thing for your overall health to have plants inside your house? Yeah. It's supposed to be, I guess. Wrong. What? Turns out it doesn't freaking matter. Oh, what is it that makes you happy? No, it does not. Because a new study looked at people with house plans to see how well plants clean the air indoors. And the answer is, they basically make zero difference what's so happy with you. I have read they literally have to be living in a jungle or a greenhouse in order to feel any effect. Pretty much. They learn to match what any half decent ventilation system does.

13:14You'd need at least one plant for every square foot of space in your home. Oh, yes, jungle. So if your place is 1,000 square feet, you'd need 1,000 plants before it would do anything to filter the air. And that's just on the low end. You just need to be steady to get to the kitchen. Also, plants make people mentally depressed. No. Because most of them die on you. Even when you try really, really hard to take care of them, they don't want to live around you. Yeah, mine die on you. So consider that myth officially busted. Tune in next time when we take a look at teeth brushing. Does it really need to happen? Or is it just some heebie-jeebie-jummed up voodoo ritual concocted by the American Dental Association to control our midnight routines? That wise, broken jeffries, mythbusters, laser stories is coming up right after this. MUSIC

14:17It's the radio segment that's helping wives get their husbands out of the bathroom with new spring-loaded toilet seats. Where after five minutes on the john, the seat will auto flush and then eject your husband back out into the real world. Yeah, that's nothing. Who cares if he's got indigestion? The sink needs fixing now. Thanks to laser stories. The segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does except we've got a laser. And there's other porcelain procrastinators just don't. This first laser story is out of Las Vegas. If you're in Sin City, you can stay at the Flamingo Hotel. But they should really post signs that say, you're not allowed to bring a real Flamingo back to your room. What? The head of the Flamingo is by the pool. Yeah. There shouldn't need to be a rule for that job. I think they need that because a 33-year-old tourist from Canada named Mitchell Fairbarn was staying at that exact hotel. When apparently he'd been drinking a little too much

15:19as you do in Vegas. And he climbed into the Flamingo Habitat, grabbed one of the birds, and took off. Oh, my gosh, that's got to be like a danger. So there's got to be a big fine here. Surveillance cameras caught him bringing Peachy, the Flamingo, back to his room. Oh, your name. Luckily, cop showed up within minutes. And that's when Mitchell initially told police that he went into the Habitat because he saw a Flamingo in distress. Oh, he was healthy. Yes, the Flamingo was suffering. He's an impact. He was just standing in the sunshine. And the good news was that he knew how to pop a bird's wing back into place. Oh, no. Thanks to his background as a farm boy. No. Don't do that. It'll pop any bird. There's no Flamingos on the farms he were on. Well, obviously there was no truth whatsoever to this. And he was arrested and thrown in jail. Good. Oh, jeez. Peachy was cared for by a local veterinarian and is expected to make a full recovery. Oh, yeah. A little wing got hurt.

16:21Everybody has a crazy Vegas story. And now Peachy, the Flamingo has one, too. I mean, why does it look like I ordered food at 3am? What thing to wake up in the movie with a tiger in your bedroom? Yeah. Not as cool wake up with a Flamingo. Yeah. I'm just forcing it. This next laser story is out of the TV taverns. There's a new reality show that's making news. It's actually over in the UK. And it's called Handcuffed Last Pair Standing. What's criminal? It's arrested first. It's not a crime show. It starts with 18 contestants or nine pairs. And like the title suggests, your handcuff to each other, but you don't get to choose who. And of course, the diabolical producers are going to pick the two most unalike people to pair up with each other. For example, one pair is a self-confessed prude who has changed to an adult film star. Do you think reality TV producers sleep well at night?

17:21Like, I just did that. Oh, yeah. They're smiling so evil. Hopefully, the film star didn't have to work while they were doing it. You know what? Hopefully that she did. Yeah. Another one is a plus-sized fashion brand owner connected to a woman who openly says large people are lazy. Everybody get in time for that. Now I'm seeing a theme here. Are we going to go with who's going to fight first? Yeah, so you get to the opposite political parties next to each other, that's great. My action might make progress on that one. Oh, we can come together. But you get the point. Each pair's handcuff together, and they have to do everything with one another in order to stay in the game. Oh, my God. The only time that they're given any distance is if they have to go number two. And even then, the cuffs aren't fully taken off. What? Instead, producers just extend their distance with a longer chain. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, my God, signs up for this stuff. How much one year they went in? It's about worldwide fame and recognition, Brooke. Oh, I don't know if the show's going to get them that.

18:21We haven't named one of their actual names. Well, so far, no one's dropped out in the first two episodes of the show, but there have been a lot of tears in drama. Yeah. And now we want to know who on this show should be him, Cuff Together, and how long do you think we could make it? Oh, great. I want to be handcuffed to action, because he could slip over those cuffs really easily. Oh, tiny little wrists. You're just stuck in the cuffs, Brooke. I'd be fine with that if I was by myself. Yeah, I know, I get it. I see. You're big enough where you could just drag him wherever you wanted to go. He could have fight you. Gotcha. This next laser story is out of fast food frenzy. This just in, Wendy's is hiring a chief tasting officer or CTO, and it pays a hundred grand. Ooh, Wendy's is our family favorite. It might be perfect for you. It is a temporary role, not an ongoing thing, but the job listing says that basically, you'll be paid to eat Wendy's. Oh, get in my belly. The reason we started loving it was

19:22the only place my grandma would eat, because she had a real germphobia, and they were the only ones at the time that would put gloves on. And they make them fresh. I think they make them the order. I prefer the non-gluten. No, it's just the gloves. I prefer a non-gluten fast food experience. Here's a snippet from the ad, quote, you'll help bring the vibes, taste, and creativity to the company in ways no one else can. Oh, they get AI to write that. Basically, you'll get paid to eat, be chill, and maybe make some content. Ooh, yeah. Maybe it sounds like definitely. Yeah. And content means social media stuff, by the way. Sure. So the, what else were you going to do? You're using your mouth to taste the food. It could be an only fans thing, you know? I don't know. But the ideal candidate is an influencer or someone who wants to become an influencer. OK. And we'll have the link for you to apply up on the Broken Jeffery Insta Stories. And according to the listing, a lot of people are qualified for this. The required skills listed include a human mouth, a pulse,

20:25and opinions. Mm-hmm. Hi. You can do food reviews. You probably can't be a vegetarian or gluten-free. It would be funny to see a vegetarian try this, though. I'd watch that. This final laser story is out of Veggieville. Scientists in Japan just developed a new breed of onion that you can chop up without crying. Oh, what? No way. Dude, I look like someone died every time I cook with onions. Well, there's, like, I look so sad. There's absolutely no hacker trick that you have to follow. These particular onions are called smile balls. Oh, wow. They were developed by a Japanese research team whose work with onions actually won them a Nobel Prize in 2013. Oh, look, you smile. Nobel Prize, yes. Back then, we were all laughing at how hilariously stupid it was to research why onions would make you cry. But now, this group's about to become ultra-rich over it. Woo-hoo! Wow. Where if you could do the opposite and make them stronger? It's set of smile balls, depression balls.

21:27So the scientists were able to discover that the enzyme that creates volatile gas reacts to natural moisture in your eye and it forces your eyes to water and flush out the irritants. Alexis, did you follow that? Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Enzymes are bad. So this new breed has that enzyme completely removed. Double rainbow. Oh, my God. That's why we need to call regular onions now as cry balls, since they're smile balls. For sure. I like it. So the new onion tastes just like an onion has the same nutritional value but doesn't ruin your mascara when you're trying to cook. Good. Plus, it only costs 93 cents, which is a small price to pay to not be sobbing over your cutting board. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's amazing. Isn't science great? It is. It is. Now, this guy's hoping that the next big breakthrough is going to be shoes with desized healing hands. That might make him craft the whole beautiful. And that sounds like laser stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again, same time, on Wednesday.

22:29We're looking Jeffrey in the morning. We got a voicemail from a woman who's figured out the most diabolical way to get out of tipping her waiter at a restaurant. Oh, really? Oh. And I wouldn't be surprised if Brooke tries to steal the idea. Oh, come on, Jeff, I can't do that. Plus, a message from Alexis's dream guy. What? Oh. If her dream guy is a dude that she needs to take care of 24-7 and mother him. OK, no, no. OK, because I never actually asked her what her dream guy is. Oh, not that. OK, I was just guessing. I feel like you're about to hear Alexis Swoon during a brand-new loser line. It's coming up right after this. All cat parents understand the feeling of being Nord by your cat. And how often asking yourself, does my cat even love me? And there's only one solution to solve that, Shiba. Feature cat Shiba and go from feeling ignored to truly adored in 12 days guaranteed or your money back. Shiba has a menu of products, appetizers, entrees, treats, and even a kitten's menu.

23:29So Shiba has a product for even the pickiest eater, like the Shiba puree, which is made with bone broth. It's a protein-rich, lickable treat with chef-inspired flavors. It has a smooth and creamy texture that cats love. Plus, it supports a strong bond between pet parents in their cats with a hand-fed cat treat. It also contains no corn, wheat, soy, or artificial flavors. So instead of feeling ignored, you're suddenly the center of their world. It's basically a fast pass to favorite human status. Next time you're wondering if your cat loves you, grab Shiba puree, or explore their entire range of textures and flavors at your local retailer. To learn more, check out Shiba.com. Growing up, I used to love movies like Bugs Life and Ants, because they just made it seem like bugs where your tiny little friends with good work ethic who go out on fun adventures and they fall in love. But then you grow up and you get your own home and spite your season happens. And suddenly your house feels less like a cute Pixar film and more like a creepy, crawly horror flick where they're invading your happy place. Well, you know what? Time to reclaim your space and your sanity with the pest control experts at Pestee.

24:30Pestee gets rid of over a hundred different types of bugs from spiders to ants to roaches and even scorpions. And Pestee's DIY 100% kid and pet friendly with a formula used in hospitals and schools around the country that help you come up with a customized plan specific to your living area, starting at just $35 per treatment. And best of all, Pestee comes with 100% guarantee. Your home will be bug free or your money back. Bugs hate to see you coming with Pestee. So go to Pestee.com slash Brooke and Jeffrey for an extra 10% off your order. That's P-E-S-T-I-E dot com slash Brooke and Jeffrey for an extra 10% off. There's not much you can do about the money you've got now. But if you wanna do something about the money you could have tomorrow, Acorns wants to help. And with the Acorns potential screen, you can find out what your money is capable of. Acorns is a smart way to give your money a chance to grow. Acorns is easy. You could sign up in minutes and start automatically investing your spare money. Even if all you've got is spare change. Plus, Acorns supports your big and small goals across every life stage. Sign up now and Acorns will boost your new account

25:31with a $5 bonus investment. Join the over 14 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $27 billion with Acorns. Head to acorns dot com slash Alexis or download the Acorns app to get started. Paid non-client endorsement. Compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns. Tier two compensation provided. Potential subject to various factors such as customers account, age and investment settings does not include Acorns fees. Results do not predict or represent the performance of any Acorns portfolio. Investment results will vary. Investing involves risk. Acorns advisors LLC and SEC registered investment advisor. View important disclosures at acorns dot com slash Alexis. Let's talk about modern home shopping. It's sort of become a fun side hobby, right? Scrolling listings at night, dreaming about kitchens you haven't seen or backyards you haven't stepped foot in all from the comfort of, well, literally anywhere. Redfin knows a lot of people like you want to own, but are stuck in this browsing mode loop. That's where Redfin flips the script. With listings that update within minutes and tours you can book right from the Redfin app,

26:31you can see your dream home the moment it appears. Now, liking a listing is easy, but actually landing it. That's where Redfin comes in. Redfin has over 2,200 agents with local expertise and Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. That means they help you win, not just win, doe shop. Redfin is built to help you go from just looking to wait. This could actually be home. So, become the newest neighbor on the block. Visit redfin.com to start finding and start owning. That's redfin.com. Military life isn't predictable, but earning your master's degree can be with American Military University's 40 plus flexible online master's programs. You can stay mission ready while you get market ready. Learn anywhere, anytime with an education built to keep pace, steady, reliable, and always accessible. Plus, military service members, veterans, and their families can save up to 45% on master's tuition with AMU's special rates and grants. Learn more at amu.apus.edu.

27:32Steady through every mission. Hey, girl, what's up with you? Wait a minute, is this the right number? It's the loser line. Come on, just call me back. If you haven't heard the loser line before it works like this, let's say someone approaches you when you're out of the club and uses this charming pickup line on you. Whoa. Is your body from McDonald's? Because I'm blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, lovin' it. Oh, wow. It's so long. How are you still standing there? Whatever you do, don't look down his pants and tell him it seems like his fries are cold. I can tell. Instead, tell him you want to supersize this connection by heading over to the Burger King bathroom so he can give you the walker. That's when you hand him the number to the loser line. So hopefully he calls it and leaves an awkward voicemail that we can play over the air. Voicemails, like this one. Next method. Apal, I know you're probably confused.

28:33So you know how I was saying to you, can you know, can you speak English? So let me tell you a little bit more. So I'm just calling you now to tell you that that's not true. I do speak English. You know, obviously you can hear me right now. I only did that because I could tell you were interested in me. And I kind of used that a lot as a self-defense mechanism to scare away creepy white guys. Because I can just say, you know what I'm saying? I can't speak English, you know, I could play. Voicemails is a juego de que no tendiendo y que no sé nada que estar hablando. You get it. But I realize now that I shouldn't have done that. Because I think maybe you're a sweet guy. And you know, if we go on a date, I couldn't be using it. Like, it's helped me get out of tipping so many times. We're like, I can see a bunch of things in Spanish. And then you can chime in and say, oh, well, they don't tip in her culture. Sorry. You covered it. Oh, that's interesting.

29:34That's how she does it. Bro, how do you get out of tip? I have a tip. But I do know that Alexis has been doing do a lingo for a long time. And now I finally found her inspiration. Oh, yeah. OK. It's just to get out of talking to guys that greet you out. The tipping. Oh, the tipping. Gotcha. Of course. Welcome to method. Hey, it's sh**. So just got my phone back from the bar. I don't recommend anybody try to pop and lock on top of the bar, like I did. Because, yeah. Well, yeah. Well, you thought that it is. Never thought I'd leave that bar on a stretcher. So turns out, I broke my leg in four places. But I'm doing much better now. Definitely, definitely doing better. Put my mom's place right now. And she's waiting on me. Got me eating a lot of grilled cheese sandwiches.

30:36I mean, a lot of grilled cheese sandwiches. She won't let me have any beer, though. So, I mean, that part sucks. But it's kind of cool, though, you know, because she brought me a bucket from my room. So, you know, I don't have to get up and walk all the way down to the hall to use the bathroom. So, I mean, that's just still relying on right there, right? Looks like a good idea. Now, wonder if the mom won't let him have beer. She doesn't want to empty that bucket. Making me want to break my leg in four places. He feels like he's living the life. They do call it break dancing. Yeah, it's a very literal idea. And speaking of getting injured and not being able to do much, if you're currently in a hospital or maybe a nursing home, maybe you're in a medically-induced coma of son of sort. And that makes you our target demographic to binge-listen our show. Can you just leave a little note for the nurse asking for 24-7 broken Jeffrey on YouTube?

31:36And you can do that. Yeah. And don't forget to subscribe while you're there. Exactly. Will you be entertained? Who knows? The look on your face isn't going to change, but at least we're going to feel good about it. Yeah, that's right. And that's something to smile about if you could smile. Anyway, now back to the clips. Next message. Hi, Ryan. That's a fucking error. That's a pretty unique last name. Did you seriously think I wouldn't Google you? Did you find out your weird history serving times perhaps? Sorry, this saying that if you know Bonnie and Clyde's situation, I'm not going to help you rob banks. I dated guys like you in the past. It never worked out. I'm not playing myself through that again. Now, my sister on the other hand, oh lord, she's fucking love you. So maybe you should have called her. And now that I think about it, you probably already bang her.

32:39And have the medical test approved it. Look at that face. The love between sisters, it's just so, so strong. There's always got to be one outlaw loving person in your family, right? Let's try the Bonnie and Clyde route, robbed a few banks with their lover and realized, oh, this isn't for me. But my sister, she's all about it. Yeah, and I have a medical detest to prove it. Background checks do always hit harder when you've been drinking heavily all morning. So that was awesome. Next message. Hey, hi, it's a fucking career night. So I just wanted to call because, obviously, you could tell I'm not the most adventurous person. I haven't tried a lot of the crazy stuff that the rest of the table seemingly has. But I want to, I don't know, I want to do something crazy. So I think I'm going to do it.

33:42I'm going to try kombucha for the first time. So I don't know if I need to get from a contact you have or a dealer or maybe if I can find it on Craigslist or the dark web or what, from someone, and I don't know if you can even answer this, but I just, I need to know how it works. So, yeah, how do I, how do I do it? How do I do it? So just coming back when you can. No, nothing. I have a bad feeling. He's getting a free basis. He's like not going to drink it. I think it's just more like, tell me you were home schooled without telling me. I'm just going to have a wild night with that special K. It's a kombucha. Kombucha. That's what it means. Totally. Remember, hit up and subscribe to our YouTube page at Brook and Jeffrey, where we post all of our content. We got our second dates, our phone tabs, and video of us reacting live in studio to all of your favorite loser line drinks.

34:44Drug and kombucha free. Oh, yeah. We're going to do a phone tab coming out right after this. It's Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. And today we call a woman who just put in her notice at work. Because her husband got a new job in a different city. So they'll both be moving soon. But before her last day, one of her coworkers wanted to say goodbye the proper way with a sweet old-fashioned radio prank. Let's do it. It's your phone tab right now. Brook and Jeffrey's phone tabs on the 20s. Hello. Hi, is this Amy? This is Amy. Who is this? Hi, Amy. I'm with the B****ing human resources. My name is Cole Cuts. I'm sorry. Who? My name is Cole. I'm with the B****ing human resources, HR. Cole Cuts. OK. Hi. Did you say Cole Cuts? Cole C-O-L-E. OK. Sorry. Hi, Cole. I don't think we've ever met before, but I did hear the news that you're leaving us soon.

35:47Yes, I am. I am. Unfortunately, yeah. Oh, my goodness. What's going on? Well, it's really because my husband got another job, and we just have to relocate. Oh. I'm actually really upset about it, to be honest, but I need you to get a good, right? Definitely. So just a few other details to tidy up before your departure. Looks like your exit interview scheduled for Friday at 3 p.m. Uh-huh. OK, make sure to bring your checkbook with you to that. What? My checkbook? Mm-hmm. Why, what do I need my checkbook? For the supply's reimbursement? Oh. So supply's really in-burst, man. What are you talking about? Well, it's in the company handbook under the exit process. Have you not read this? Truthfully, I have not looked at the handbook in a while. I was at the company for five years. So it's been a bit... Well, let me remind you, it's company policy that when anyone leaves their position here

36:50to join a new company, you need to pay for the amount of office supplies you used. Are you serious? You think I'm not serious? I'm literally calling you about it. It's my job. OK, relax. So this is... I'm not the one that's getting bent out of shape here. Wait, wait, wait. I use a computer. I've used multiple screens. Oh, no, trust me. I have the full rundown of all the supplies that you've used in the past five years here. So what? And if you break it down, let's just dive into this. That's 60 months at an average of $47 per month. Your total is going to come out to $2,820. You're telling me that I have to pay you almost three grand for using equipment I needed to use to do my job? I get that this is all a big surprise for you, but I need to know, will you be paying cash or check?

37:50I'm not going to be paying at all, Cole, whoever you are. It's Cole Cuts. Cole Cuts. And if I'm understanding you correctly, you've elected to have it deducted from your last two paychecks, then? No, I haven't elected sh**. I haven't elected anything. Well, you're refusing to pay the amount that you owe the company. I don't owe. I gave the company five years of my God s**t in life. But you also took five years of supplies from us, too. I didn't take anything. Barrowed. I know what I really want to call it. Tools to do my God s**t job. Right. And my God s**t job is getting you to pay the money that you owe to us. So if we can just get to that. So you're a thief. So you're a thief. Well, if you're the one refusing to pay us, that would make you the thief. Again, this is all laid out for you in the company handbook. Screw the damn company handbook. I don't believe you. I think that you're just trying to squeeze three grand out of an employee.

38:51What, you think this is some kind of shakedown? Who pays to work? What type of sh** is that? My plan was to keep this very cordial. And I wasn't even going to charge you for the birthday cake that we got you last year. The birthday cake. You think that was free? That dusty ass s**t dry ass birthday cake. You want me to pay for that? Listen, I talked to your supervisor. He bought it and it cost at least $19. This is so absurd. This is more absurd than anything that you have just said. Really? More absurd than your coworker Tony setting you up for a phone tap on the radio? Wait, what? Because he did that. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. I kid it. It's, yeah. Oh my god. Yeah. I am going to go and slap him across his face. I almost had a heart attack. I'm sorry. This is Jeff from Rook and Jeffrey in the morning. Your coworker Tony set you up. I was like, this has to be some sort of joke that I have to pay for office supplies.

39:56Don't forget the birthday cake. Oh my god. The birthday cake. I'm never going to forget the birthday cake. Good. We won't either. We'll take your $19 now. OK, enough. So can Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s? Rook and Jeffrey in the morning. If you listen to our second date updates and you've heard enough of them, you know anything can happen in these calls. That is pretty much happening. We never know what to expect going in. And today, even we were surprised because the guy who wanted to score another hang out isn't even the one that's on the phone with us. Somebody else is doing the call in his place. Oh, wow. It already starts weird. Yeah. And you're going to find out who it is and probably be shocked when we come back for your brand new second date update right after this. All cat parents understand the feeling of being Nord by your cat. And how often asking yourself, does my cat even love me?

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44:05Your move, learn more at yourmoveohio.com. I read an article recently where, in New York City right now, they're holding speed dating events, just tons of them, where it's a three to one female to male ratio. Yeah, keep going. I've heard about this. Yeah, and this is where men can attend them for free, and women have to pay $100 or more, which is drastic price difference, but guys just aren't showing up to these, like at all anymore. And the reason why is because they interviewed some of the guys, and men say they feel like they're most likely going to get ignored or rejected by the women there anyway. Yes, true. So even a free ticket just feels like a big waste of time. Totally. So all the men have given up in New York City and blamed the woman. Yeah, I love it. That's what I just heard. Well, it's nice that you came with such an open heart towards these guys and their feelings.

45:05I'm sure that has nothing to do with how they feel. I wonder where they feel weird about the women. I know, no, but no one knows that better than one of our listeners, Stacy, who's on the phone right now, because she wingmaned her brother at one of these events. I'm not sure why he's not on the phone with us. Hold up. If you're just wingmaning your brother, your brother better have paid your $100 entry fee. Oh, yeah. Stacy, welcome to the show. Hey, guys, how's it going today? Good. We ask you the questions. Brooke is right. Who paid? We're looking at you. So yeah, I guess who paid? Did your brother pay for this? My brother did pay for it. Okay. Wow. And why did he think he wanted his sister to be there? You know, he's just a really shy guy, and he asked if I would go with him. And of course, you know, he's my baby brother. I love her. I'm going to go with him. I want him to find happiness. You're like his comfort, like service animal. Yeah. Until you find a hot guy, and then he's on his own. Yeah. Most certainly. But wait, did you participate too? I did. I didn't find anybody, but he did.

46:08Wait. I thought this was a second date update for you. You know, I am actually calling for my brother. Oh, he's the interesting guy. I told him to call you guys. He said he was too nervous, so I said, why don't you just email them, and he just was too embarrassed. Couldn't do it. Oh, buddy. He's not even face-to-face with us. Like, we're harmless. We're on the phone. I know, but that's scary to be on the radio. Like I can get that. Yeah, especially when we're talking to Brooke as a man, I don't feel fear coming on. I mean, your sister will air all your dirty laundry. Yeah. This thing is, we'll probably get the honest truth about what you think he did wrong. Oh, yeah. Before we call this girl. Instead of him just being oblivious to everything. That's how siblings were. I'm curious how much do you know about your brother and the girl he met, like, how much detail do you have? I mean, I have the detail in the sense that I was there, and I was kind of overhearing what they were saying, but they hit it off so well. They had so much in common. Like my brother spent a year in Italy for a travel abroad program, and it turns out

47:11that she did two. They just seemed to really, really hit it off, and, like, you know, that arm touch, she just like reached across the table when you're laughing, and it means more than just touching your arms. She did like five times. Oh. Oh. And did he? Did he do that to her? They're just touching arms. Touching arms, and maybe you touch both their arms? No, no. No, he was very respectful, but at the end of the day, they picked each other. Okay. Oh, that's bad. Oh, at the end of the speed dating. Yeah. Yeah. Choose your favorite. It's wild to, like, pick somebody, spend the money to be at the event, and then not follow through with a person that you picked. Are you saying about wasting money? Yes. Sometimes you will change your hearts. So this is the only interaction that they had, is that the speed dating? No, they did go on a follow-up date. Oh. Oh, yeah. Right after they went to dinner, I did not join them for that one. It is very possible. He screwed it up there. Oh. Okay. Dinner was fine, but it ended with him walking her to the car.

48:14Good. He was hoping to chat with her, but she was really, really quiet and just kept insisting that he didn't have to walk her back. Oh. Oh, that's a bad thing. Oh, during the walk? Most growing. Yeah. You really don't have to come. Well, I mean, at night, you want somebody to come. Yeah. Anybody. I mean, guy, girl, like, friend. Normally, unless, yeah. Server? Clearly, there's something happening between the two of them where she doesn't want him around. And that's how you know he did something wrong, right? Is the sister? It's, it's very possible. Ben is so sweet. Like, like, we call him sweet Benjamin in the family. Like, that is. I don't know. That's a good or bad thing. Yeah. Yeah. Sweet Benjamin sounds like he needs extra light. We have our first reason why she's probably not calling him down. Yeah. That's good. It is very possible. But I also, you know, he doesn't know what's going on. And I just, I want to help because he, he walked her to the car and apparently she didn't even say thank you. She just waved, got right in her car, like, no opportunity to even, like, hug goodbye. Ben. Does Ben know that you're doing this for him?

49:16I know you encourage him to do it. But does he know you took the reins? I told him I was going to. I don't know if he believed me, but at this point, he should. Yeah. Well, if this is interesting, it's going to hit the air. He's going to hear it. Sister instinct. What do you think went wrong? I feel like there was probably a misunderstanding of some kind at dinner. Okay. I don't know what it could be, but Vita seemed so into him that it just doesn't make sense. I'm sorry. What was her name? Vita. Vita. Don't cry for me, Argentina. Oh, that's like the coconut water. Oh, Vita. Yeah. Oh, yeah, like the coconut water. Yeah. I'm sorry. All right. So she sounds a little bit foreign. Maybe she needs like a spicier guy in her life. Not sweet, Ben. Well, she did go to Italy for a while. That's true. Oh, it's her E. If she's also a shy person, this may be really overwhelming. Yeah. Yeah. Well, again, then we won't air it. I know. Well, I'm excited to find out when we come back. We call Vita for on behalf of Stacey's brother.

50:17What's his name again? Ben. Sweet Ben. Oh, that's her sweet name. I can't forget. We'll see why she was acting so awkward at the end of their day when we come back and get it with your second date update right after this. Hold on. Broken Jeffrey in the morning, second date update. Find every sweet shy boy is a proud, well-spoken sister, ready to go to bat on his behalf. Like your sister, Jeff. Says our own shy boy. And that's why Stacey reached out to us because she winged man to her brother, Ben recently at a speed dating event, and watched him walk out the door with a pretty woman. Hey. Watch chemistry happen. Get it, sweet Benjamin. He walked right out that event and took her straight to dinner where, apparently, things probably went wrong. He blew it. We don't know exactly what happened there, but according to what Stacey has heard from her brother several times as he was walking her back to her car. She said to him, you know, you don't have to walk with me, which is not a good sign.

51:20Never said thank you and just waived good buy at him before she left. And Stacey demands answers. Well, no, no, Stacey is trying to help out. Stacey is ready to hit someone if someone doesn't explain what went on. Am I right? Stacey. Oh, you are not wrong. I am ready to fight here. Okay. Stacey. I knew it. Do you don't we never asked did Vita find out that you were at the speed dating event? I don't know if she did. Okay. I'm just wondering. But it did occur to me. That could be a weird thing. Right. Some people that may not sit right. Especially if they're not close with their sibling. They don't understand. Or the way that Ben may have brought it up at dinner could be, you know, yeah, I took my sister to the speed dating event. And that could be kind of awkward. My husband often says, I married my sister, I'm like, no, you officiated the wedding honey. It's different. I said the same. I officiated my sister's wedding. Yeah. And how you say the words matters a lot. So let's find out what happened. We don't know. So the only way to find out is if Vita picks up the phone and actually comes clean with

52:23it. So let's do it. I'm going to dial the number. Here we go. Hello. Hey, we're looking to speak with Vita. Yes. This is her. Hey, Vita. Thanks for answering. We're a radio show. We're called Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. Hi, Vita. Good morning. I like your name. Hi. Thank you. Are you still really outgoing? Yeah. Thanks, Brooke. Not you. Yeah. My bad. Sorry. Thank you guys. What's up? Yeah. We're really eager to talk to you because we heard you went out with a guy that we kind of know. Name Benjamin. His name is Ben. Yeah. As a friend of ours. You guys went on a speed date. That's where you met and then went on a dinner date afterwards. Yeah. The pity date. What? Oh, pity date. Why would you say that? It's like ripped a bandit off for us. Well, like at the speed date, he was just like borderline crying about how he hasn't been

53:23out with a woman. Oh, no. Yeah. It's like, okay. Well, I guess we'll just go after this. Are you exaggerating a little bit? I mean, maybe he was just maybe. Yeah. I broke out. Maybe he had dust in his eyes. Try anything else. Walk us through the crying part. I mean, it's not crying, but like just like borderline like tears in his eyes. Like sulking. Like, you know, he wasn't creepy. So like, I knew like he would be safe to go out with. Yeah. Oh, okay. He's just like sweet. Yeah. I hate that these are our boundaries as women. Yeah. Yeah. I feel so bad. I'll take some free dinner from this sweet, not creepy guy and then I'll ghost him forever. Well, maybe she took him out. Did you pay? No. He paid. Okay. Like a gentleman. But yeah. When you said yes to dinner, did you tell him like, fine, take me out? Like, was it obvious that it was a pity date or did he think you were actually into it?

54:23I mean, he couldn't have thought that I was too into it. Like, I didn't seem like overly enthusiastic about it. I was just like, okay, well, let's go to dinner. That's not quite the review that we heard. We were under the impression there was more chemistry between you two at the speed dating. Remember, you had lived in Italy. He had lived in Italy. Yeah. You had arms. You had arms. You touched your arm with his arm. I remember on the speed date, I kept touching his hand because he had like peanut butter on it or something. Oh. Like a child. That would make me not want to touch it. Yeah. Yeah. Just eating bumps on a log. Okay. So it's pretty pathetic. Oh. I feel like he's adorable because he's a pathetic thing. I mean, here's the thing. You never gave him a chance. It sounds like I went to freaking dinner with him. What do you mean I didn't give him a chance? He's already written in your mind that it was a pity date. You know, like once you pity someone, you can't, like there's no respect there. Yeah. Even if he does something cool, it's hard to break out of pity. Well, did he do something cool? Like was he at least nice and respectful during your dinner date?

55:23He was fine. But just like anything, like once you get the egg with somebody, you like it. Oh. And you know what? Like he couldn't even order his own dinner. Like I had to pick his meal for him. Like mother. Like I'm surprised he didn't ask me to cut up his food. Okay. That's a little childish. Well, we heard he's socially awkward, so. Yeah. Or just maybe nervous around a really pretty woman. Oh. Well, we've got to take a pretty woman out to dinner. You should at least be able to like order for yourself. I'm taking you to the nicest place in the city when you read the menu for me. Oh, man. It's not going to look good when he finds out who's on the phone. Yeah. I feel so bad. Yeah. Do we have to do this part? We do, because here's the deal, Vita. We kind of have a surprise for you. Because Ben is not on the phone with us right now. That's right. His sister Stacy, however, is. Are you kidding me? I'm not. She was the one who reached out looking to get answers on Ben's behalf. So she wants to talk to you, I think.

56:24Stacy? How dare you? Oh, God. You are an absolute monster of a human. And I am so grateful. So grateful that my brother is not going on a second date with you. Yeah. We are not. Oh, mom. You can't even like call the radio station himself. He has. He can't call the radio station himself because he's so used to women like you causing these kinds of problems. Oh, okay. Here you go. Stacy, what? Let's take a deep breath. Like she didn't know you were listening. She didn't know. Like she wasn't trying to hurt anybody's feelings. I understand it was probably hard to hear. It was harsh. It was harsh. But you know what? If she didn't like him, why'd she pick him for the date? Why was he the one? You have to pick a person. I didn't want him to bust out trying like literally just like throwing the dog a bone. Oh, my God.

57:24Don't call him a dog. Wow. It sounds rude. But she was trying to help. You were not trying to help. Are you kidding me? This bitch wanted a friend. You literally said it. You literally said it in the call. What did she say? She said she was not interested. And that she went out with him anyway. She called it a pity date. And I swear to God if I hear pity date one more time. I'm going to use my. Okay. Okay. Okay. You know, I agree. Vita is saying some not nice things. But Stacy, maybe like even though it's a pity date, maybe your brother doesn't have to know. You know, it's like getting a job when you already have a job is easier. Like going on another date when you know you've been on one. Maybe it's a boost of confidence he needs. Let him break up with her. Y'all are spinning this in a way that you're trying to get her off the hook. And how dare you treat a kind man like that? Exactly. Broke out dare you. Treat a kind man like Ben like this. Your brother was like crying during the speed date. I was sitting right there. He was absolutely not crying. He was engaging in the conversation.

58:24Okay. There's a touch with this emotions. Yeah. A little too engaged. Just like a little too emotional. And then, and then it didn't like what adult cannot place their own food orders. Yeah. You know what Vita? I've heard enough. You've already said all of these things. And you have absolutely made the worst decision of your life. You would be lucky to date someone like my brother. Oh. A good sister. And you just go out with your brother. No. Oh. Oh god. Okay. But listen. I know. We should do more brother's sister second date. I know. Because this is awesome. Actually, my sister will call a girl yell at her. I know. I know. Girls from my brothers. Oh hell yeah. Stacy, could you maybe see that you guys, like your family's maybe coddling your brother a little bit too much? Like you're calling the light. Oh. Stacy, she's doubling down saying your brother's a wimp. This isn't about my brother anymore. This is about that woman. That toxic woman in her behavior. I know. Broke is not the most pleasant person. I know.

59:24She's not broke. She's not broke. I'm talking about Vita. What she did to that sweet boy regardless of what he's a grown man. That's a forty years old. That sweet boy needs to grow up. Oh. Yeah. And you need to find a soul. You harpy. Oh. Wow. Not sure it hurt though. Do we be bad? You know, it's at this point in the call where we always offered to send the couple out on another date, and we would pay for it. So at this point, Vita, I feel like there's a chance that we could have all three of you meet up one more time to work out your differences and all order food for each other. No, I think I'm gonna pass on that one. So you're passing with Stacy, but not on her brother. You're still open to Ben. On both of them, I'm good. And Stacy, I don't appreciate you calling me names. Your brother should grow the f*** up. Oh, okay. Maybe a hard truth. Maybe he should, but at least he won't be alone for the

1:00:27rest of his life. Okay, I think she meant that as a dig to Vita, but I worry that might actually happen where big sis is actually gonna end up becoming sweet Benjamin's mommy, ordering him smiley face pancakes off the iHop menu for the rest of his life. Oh, sorry. It's kind of sweet. You're right. I don't know why during the call. I just, I had this weird image in my mind. But do you think that during intimacy, sweet Ben shyly raises his hand and asks the woman to help him put on his prophylactic? Oh, excuse me. How could you say hands? Oh, wow. I mean, he couldn't order his own dinner. He had painted butter all over his arm. I'm starting to see what Brooks saw during their conversation. I did not say that. Nobody pictured that. Oh, you were there. Oh, jumping straight to the end. Man, he's going in for a kiss. I can't imagine any of it. I mean, I hate to admit Vita actually

1:01:31made a good point. If he really wanted a second date with her, he should have been the one that called. Yeah. I mean, that's kind of all the dates. That's the problem. It's like, I understand it can be probably really hard if you're socially anxious, but also you can't have somebody hold your hand the whole time either. Yeah. Are you practicing the speech to give to your son? I already tell my kids. I'm like, listen, mommy's not going to be around to cut your meat when you're on a date someday. That's going to be real embarrassing. So learn to ask your date. Yeah. That's a real man. We can help you out with your dating life or help you out with your brother or sister's dating. Let's not offer that again. Yeah. I mean, I thought it was fine. But if you need help, reach out to the show and we can call that person who's not calling you back. Oh, check out all of our second date updates. They're online. River, get your podcasts at Brook and Jeffrey. Brook knows better than anyone that having children is a great tool to get out of your work responsibilities or social events. I mean, honestly, anything that nobody questions

1:02:33it. Right after Brook had her first baby, she didn't even come to the office for like three straight months. Yeah. Oh, you came with a name for it. Yeah. It was a whole 11 and a half weeks. Wow. That's a plenty of time. God, it was so much time to be good. I felt so excited. Yeah. Respect for your commitment to the excuse, bro. Yeah. Don't worry on the second one. I only took 10 weeks. Oh, wow. Learned your lesson. Where were you like in France or something? But you can only use your helpless children as a scapegoat so many times before the boss starts to get upset. And that's why every good employee knows you got to get creative with your excuses for why you can't work that day. And people turns out kind of suck at that. I know that because a list just came out of the craziest excuses people have ever used to try to leave work. We'll go over them after we all take a little mini maternity leave here and then we'll come back right after this. All cat parents understand the feeling of being Nord by your cat. And how often asking yourself

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1:04:36a lot of people like you want to own, but are stuck in this browsing mode loop. That's where Redfin flips the script. With listings that update within minutes and tours you can book right from the Redfin app, you can see your dream home the moment it appears. Now, liking a listing is easy, but actually landing it? That's where Redfin comes in. Redfin has over 2,200 agents with local expertise, and Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. That means they help you win, not just win, doe shop. Redfin is built to help you go from just looking to wait. This can actually be home. So, become the newest neighbor on the block. Visit Redfin.com to start finding and start owning. That's Redfin.com. Military life isn't predictable, but earning your master's degree can be. With American military universities 40 plus flexible online master's programs, you can stay mission ready while you get market ready. Learn anywhere, anytime, with an education built to keep pace, steady, reliable, and always accessible. Plus, military service members, veterans, and

1:05:40their families can save up to 45% on master's tuition with AMU special rates and grants. Learn more at AMU.apus.edu, steady through every mission. You know what I could really go for right now? Literally anything that comes in a McDonald's carton, wrapper, or bag, or a McDonald's cup. Yes, any of those items should do it. We've got your cravings covered. Now, stop in for the flaky filet of fish, the crispy snack wrap, or a large fries for just $2.99. Limited time only, price and participation may vary. Cannot be combined with any other offer. Some people like working twice as hard, just to stay right where they are. And in Ohio, we really don't get it. Because to us, owning a home in your 30s, working in tech without the traffic, and still being able to make it to your kid's soccer game, sounds pretty good. In fact, Ohio is the second most affordable state to buy a home. Your move, learn more

1:06:46at yourmoveohio.com. Remember lying as a kid to try to get out of going to school. Oh, yeah. Such a good time. It's broken Jeffrey in the morning. You'd fake an illness or invent an injury, maybe slash the tires on your mom's car, say, criminals did it. Whoa, look at that kid scissors, apparently. No, not again. Why do the thugs in this cold to sack always hit our house? But when you grow up, you got to get a little bit more creative with your lies if you're trying to get out of work. And it turns out some people just aren't very good at that. Oh, my God. Because a new survey asked people to share the funniest excuses they've ever heard somebody else use in order to leave work early. Oh, here we go. Now people try to get creative with it, but is it believable? Let's find out. One person said they needed to leave work because their dog had locked their son out of their

1:07:50house. But what if that's true somehow? Why would you say that if it wasn't actually accurate? It is a wild like makeup. Yeah, yeah. It is interesting to think that a dog could like turn the knob on a door to lock it. But maybe the door was already locked like the handle, you know, like where you can set the handle to just be locked in the clothes. And then the dog shut the door. Oh, okay. We're all going to fall for all these. Maybe their dog was Scooby-Doo. And he's just very dexterous. Oh, yeah. It's going to work on Brooke like mom to the press all the key codes. Yeah. All right. We'll give them a pass on that one. Another excuse that somebody tried, they couldn't come to work because their reflection looked judgey that morning. And they needed a mental health day to self-evaluate and repair their relationship with the mirror. Brooke, you buy in that one. Well, I have gotten into a fight with my shadow before. So, I mean, you know, you have outfit crisis before you go out and you're like, that's it. I'm not going like that feels like. This is valid. Yeah,

1:08:53tired eyes. That's the same thing. Don't deserve to work that day. Another gem, someone tossed out to get out of work. Their parent got out of its cage and was chasing their wife around the house. Oh, my God. It's a Randy parent. Okay. Well, you know that one's a lie because any real husband would think that was hilarious and they would not go rushing home to help. That's true. All I could think about is remember our intern who lost his keys in a lake, two states away. Wow. How did he even get here? I can't remember. I have no idea. He somehow got to work, but then had to go back to the other state to retrieve his vehicle. Yeah, I don't even know how he got it. This was the same intern that locked himself out out of a balcony for hours. Yeah, he got into so many shenanigans. We just started believing everything that he said. Can I say he owns like four houses? He's doing better than all of us. This is a good one. Someone told their boss they needed to leave early because their car was low on gas. Oh, that makes no. It makes total sense. Gas disappears

1:09:57from the tank if you leave it in there for too long. So you got to get some more before it runs out. I remember one time when I worked at the Olive Garden. I was a busser, but it was a religious holiday. Like our lady of Guadalupe, something about the Latino community. So I tried to say I can't come in today because my family's going to church. My manager, his name was Vicente, goes Jose. The entire kitchen is filled with Mexicans. Nobody would be here. Get to work and I had to come into work. That's right. I forgot. Damn it. Why weren't they working with a bunch of white people? You're just joining us. We're looking at a survey where people shared the dumbest excuses that they've ever heard somebody else try to use in order to get out of going to work. This one, I believe because it says they worked from home, but they said they had to leave an online meeting because a squirrel fell down their chimney and was running around inside their house. Oh, my God. I believe that one. I can see that. That's too crazy to make up. No. That has to have actually happened. The madness. Why are animals so wild when they're in your own home? Like if

1:11:00a bird gets in your house, it is honestly the scariest thing that I've ever agreed to be fair. Whenever I go into like a new hotel room, I kind of act like an animal and I'm like running around. I'm jumping on the bed. I'm going crazy in there. I don't know. Dirty back in sort. So I can relate. Let's keep going with it back to the gold. Someone told their boss they had to go because their goldfish was drowning and then they walked out of the office before the manager could process the physics of that statement. Yeah, they breathe water. Another one says a guy called out of work saying he got lost in the woods all weekend and didn't find his way back home until like 4 a.m. Monday morning. So he needed rest like a search party. I mean, he could have just been camping. Yeah, I know. It's like I'm not lying. I mean, I plan to get lost for the entire weekend. But still, no, I am in a cabin. Yeah. But one person actually left a hot tip for the excuse that they

1:12:01like to use. Quote. I frequently say I have a casserole in the oven and then just leave. I use it for parties, weddings, social events and work. Doesn't matter. I'll just check my watch and say, Oh, I have a casserole in the oven and I go and it works every time. Who needs a casserole in the oven then leaves their house. I go to a wetter. Went like a crock bot. Would that work? No. No. Never mind. And finally, one worker witnessed this. It says their wife called the office and said her husband had to come home immediately. Oh, she sounded flustered and couldn't explain why everybody in the office was concerned. And then later, the guy walked back into work and confessed his wife had called into a radio show and won $500 because she was able to convince him to leave work immediately without telling him it was a radio contest. That was the contest. You got to do something like that. Hey, if you get him to quit your job, we have $50. Those were the strangest excuses people have ever tried to use to get out of work.

1:13:05We'll look in Jeffrey in the morning. Win, rock, rock. They say size doesn't matter. But on Newbie Week, it absolutely does. We go big with nubes. That's right. Monday through Friday, this week only are brand new players that have never sniffed a whiff of Brooke before. Oh, man, lucky you guys. What are you talking about? You got to be nice because remember, they're newbies. Will they win? Probably not, but let's pretend like they have a shot anyway. Yeah, that's right. Welcome to the show is our newest newbie. Yeah. Wow. I need to go. A lot of people will tell us that they play along in their car and always win, but then they'll lose in person. You said you lose every time in the car. So maybe, yeah, maybe this will be the opposite for you. And you'll come on the show and destroy her. I like

1:14:05that. Singers cross. Yes. All right. We're crossing all of our limbs. Let's get to the game. You got 30 seconds to answer as many questions as possible. If you don't know when you could say pass, but you have to beat Brooke outright if you want to win. Are you ready? Yes. Good luck. Your time starts now in what decade did Mattel introduce the Barbie doll? Forties or fifties? Forties. What's the technical name for a gas pedal in your car? Uh, a gas pedal in Lion King. What's the name of the iconic cliff where Rafiki lifts Simba? Pass 28 states, including Wisconsin have the same official state beverage. What is it? Coffee in the movie Shrek. What's the name of the donkey? Uh, oh, Oh, Laura, you're going to be kicking yourself when we come around to that one again. But let's bring Brooke back into the studio here because we're talking. Wait, we're going to get to know our player a little bit more. Laura says that she's a country girl

1:15:16who lives on a farm with chickens and she likes to spend her free time training her new puppy and enjoys national parks. I'm surprised we even have any time to listen to us. It sounds like you've a really busy, fulfilling life, Laura. Well, the chickens, you know, get up early, take care of those. The puppy goes with me in the truck. She tries to win, too, but the bartender doesn't help. That's the chicken question. Yeah. I heard that the color of the egg is just reflective of the color of the feathers of the chicken. The color is just hyperbreed. That's all it is. Okay. Maybe that's right. Do you like Ella Langley? I'm obsessed with her. I don't know who she is. No, she lives in the country. I just see you're playing old McDonald has a farm over and over again. But maybe that's just me. Brooke, your time starts now. In what decade did Mattel introduce the Barbie doll? Forties or fifties? Fifties. What is the technical name for a gas pedal in your car? Accelerator. In Lion King, what's the name of the iconic cliff where Rafiki

1:16:18lifts Simba? The cliff. 28 states, including Wisconsin, have the same official state beverage. What is it? Cola? In the movie. Trek. What's the name of the donkey? Donkey. For 28 years, what wall separated East and West Germany before being torn down? The Berlin wall. Those are weird though. It's all part of the answer, too. What was part of the answer? Never mind. He didn't say the word Berlin. What? Oh, he didn't. He just said Germany. Let's go to the scoreboard to see how you both did with Jose. But I do love nuts. Why would you randomly say that for no reason? There's I do. Laura. Yeah. You guys here. Wow. I'm so sorry. Thanks Laura. Well, she predicted she wouldn't do well and she followed through well done. Yeah. Good job, Laura. Just as you thought. And Brooke, four carats. She's a big fan of your victory today. I like it. All right. Let's go over

1:17:19the answers for everybody. Mattel first introduced Barbie dolls back in the 1950s on this day actually in 1959. The technical name for a gas pedal in your car would be the accelerator. In Lion King, Rafiki lifts Simba on top of Pride Rock. 28 states, including Wisconsin. Wisconsin was the big hinge here. Have the official state beverage of milk. When he said Wisconsin, I'm like, what liquid cheese? Yeah. That would be good. Yes. Milk is another name for that. That's your cheese. In the movie Shrek, donkeys name is donkey. Great question. You did get there, Laura, but unfortunately time had expired. And for 28 years, the wall that separated East and West Germany was the Berlin wall. So it was not enough to be broke today. But the good news is just for playing. We are going to give you a $25 Disney gift card valid at any Disney resort theme park or online in the Disney store.

1:18:20Awesome. Thank you guys. It was fun playing even though I lost. Awesome. We'll be back to the Windbrook's Box same time tomorrow. We're looking to free in the morning. All cat parents understand the feeling of being totally ignored by your cat. And often thinking, does my cat even love me? There's only one solution to solve that. Shiba. Feature cat Shiba and go from feeling ignored to truly adored in 12 days guaranteed or your money back. Shiba has a menu of products, appetizers, entrees, treats, and even a kitten's menu. So Shiba has a product for even the pickiest eater. Like Shiba puree made with bone broth, a smooth and creamy texture that cats love, or Shiba grilled. Protein rich formula made with real chicken and seafood. To learn more, check out Shiba.com. Military life isn't predictable, but earning your master's degree can be. With American military universities 40 plus flexible online master's programs, you can stay mission ready while you get market ready. Learn anywhere, anytime, with an education built to keep pace, steady, reliable, and always accessible. Plus military service members, veterans, and their families can save up to 45% on master's tuition with AMU's special rates

1:19:24and grants. Learn more at AMU.apus.edu, steady through every mission. Some people like working twice as hard, just to stay right where they are. And in Ohio, we really don't get it. Because to us, owning a home in your 30s, working in tech without the traffic, and still being able to make it to your kids' soccer game, sounds pretty good. In fact, Ohio is the second most affordable state to buy a home. Your move, learn more at yourmoveohio.com. Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same premium wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities, so do like I did, and have one of your assistance assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to do at mintmobile.com slash switch upfront payment of $45 for three month plan, equivalent to $15 per month required. Intro rate first three months only,

1:20:26then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra, feeful terms at mintmobile.com. Winner is in full swing, and a leave is here to keep you moving. When the cold weather sets in, everyday aches and pains can linger, but a leave's got your back. With up to 12 hours of body pain relief per dose, a leave keeps you going with long lasting body pain relief to get you through whatever the season brings. Chili days or cozy nights, a leave gives you that long lasting body pain relief you can count on this winner. Try a leave uses directed for minor aches and pains.