Dr. Jay Barnett on Trauma, Love & Letting Go

Dr. Jay Barnett's story could have ended tragically twice. The former NFL player survived two suicide attempts, left an abusive home at 16, and found healing through an unexpected white family who showed him what unconditional love looked like. Now a mental health therapist, author, and speaker, he's dedicated his life to helping Black men break free from trauma and build healthy relationships.

On this powerful episode of the For Good podcast, Dr. Jay opens up to Joseph "JoJo" Simmons about the moment Woody Marr became the first man to hug him, how that experience taught him boys need emotional connection to become emotionally available men, and why the dating pool is "screwed up" because people think they have to perform to be loved.

Dr. Jay shares a moving story about a 76-year-old man who'd been carrying guilt about his Black teammate for over 70 years. He also explains how to know when you've truly moved beyond your past:

"You know you're free when you can step back into that thing and it doesn't have the same influence."

He and Joseph "JoJo" Simmons also dive into:

• How childhood trauma shapes adult relationships and why boys need more emotional connection
• The difference between accepting what happened and taking it on as your identity
• Why creating safe spaces is about being safe with yourself first
• His upcoming book on pace and nervous system regulation with Penguin Random House