Comedy 4 Cast: A.I. Artificial Interference(030626)

0:00We're leaving today and entering a world of Mickey Mouse waving, princess meeting and greetings. Lightsaber clashing! The Twilight Zone tower of terror dropping! Banshee flying! Space Mountain launching! Galaxy rewinding, what's the one that look galaxy rewinding? Bioworks igniting! World of other worlds, for whatever you love. Infinite worlds await at the most magical place on earth What Disney World Resort? It's time for Friday Follies right here on the Mutual Audio Network. The following audio drama is rated PG for parental guidance recommended. The Comedy Four Cast Network. Let's doggie her that for now. Oh hi Clinton here.

1:00Welcome to my show Comedy Four Cast. Episode 825 to be exact. Brought to you by Gary, Darren, Stan and my other amazing Patreon patrons. Thank you. To become a patron yourself and help me do what I do here, go to patreon.com slash comedy forecast. That's all one word with the number four. You can even get episodes before everyone else. How cool is that? But right now, we're headed to the lobby of the Venus Arms Hotel and Towers, where an IT person is working on some high tech equipment. Enjoy the show, I'll be back a bit later. You know, usually we install these things and that's it. So why have I been called back here three times this week? Perhaps I'm just a bit more finicky than some people.

2:00Call me crazy, but I prefer things to work. Oh, you can bet I call you crazy. What was that? Nothing. I'll bet it was nothing. What was that? Nothing. Oh, bet. He probably... Look, can we please just get this kiosk working? I was told it would simplify my life. So far, it's only made you a semi-permanent resident here at the hotel. And we're not in the business of paying the guests. And I'm telling you that this whole thing is working fine. There's nothing wrong with the CPU or the monitor or the AI software. Oh, really? Tell it you want to make a reservation. Fine. If it'll shut you up. What was that? Oh, nothing, nothing. Hey, Giles. And that's another thing. Why does it respond to Giles? My name is Giles. Giles. And it's still an animated picture of Ms. Farmac around the screen.

3:04With my voice. When are you going to fix that, Reverse Mrs. Doc Fire Horror? We've been over this. Generating a new avatar takes time. Now, can I get back to making this reservation? Sure thing, James Cameron. Hey, Giles. I want to make a reservation. Of course. You see? Welcome to the Venus Arms hippocampus and towers. Yes, I want, wait, what did you say? I may like Labby, the virtual front desk astronaut who keeps getting taller, but not wider. How many nights will you be staying with us? Now, just a minute. I'm sorry, but the minimum stay at our hotel is one nightstand and matching bed frame. I've never seen one of these things go bad like this before. Are you sure you're not messing with it? It's messy enough on its own. Thank you very much. Now, hold on, hold on. Why didn't I think of this before? This thing records all the interactions with the kiosk.

4:07You've been spying on us. Oh, please. Don't flatter yourself. It just records when someone interacts with it. I'll play it here on the monitor. You see? There's me from yesterday. Hi, yes. Part of your daily routine. There. You should be all set now. Don't worry, Giles. I know it's not your fault. I'm betting it's Mr. Cranky pants over there doing something wrong. What was that? Oh, nothing. Let's jump back another day. Testing. One, two. Oh, look. It's you this time. Testing. One, two. Welcome to the Venus Arms hotel and towers. And when are they going to change this to my picture? I'm beginning to have nightmares about Miss Fallmarker speaking with my voice. Giles, when are you going to alphabetize the wallpaper? And Giles, why haven't you polished the ceiling?

5:09Between you and me, I think the installer is doing this on purpose. He's trying to gaslight me. Now, hold on. What was all that about? Just skip back some more Bill Gates. Well, galley. It must be nice still living in the 1990s. Okay, Giles. I'll be back in a few minutes. I have to go inventory Miss Fallmarker's little wicker basket collection. They're everywhere. Yeah, tell me about it. Oh, look. It's a customer entering the lobby. Go. Call the drink, espresso. It's just a dinner. But retail. Gotta have more espresso. Welcome to the Venus Arms hotel and towers. Hi, Danny Hillcrest here. Wait. Who am I talkingly speaking to? I am AI Giles. The virtual front desk assistant. Oh, it's a Harry Potter'sville framed picture of Miss Fallmarker.

6:09And Giles is doing some improv scripted dubbing. I love it. It's just like stepping off the subway at Warthog Castle. Hi, Danny Hillcrest here. Welcome to the Venus Arms hotel and towers. Giles and Abby. I dub this business power pairing. GLABBY. Of course. He named it GLABBY. You know this guy. He lives here. How many nights will you be staying with us? That's a great question, GLABBY. I live here. So I guess I'll be staying here every night. I'm sorry that answer is just a bit confusing to me. Me too. And I said it. I think I've seen it enough. We can turn this. Oh no. I want to hear more of this. I'll rephrase my question if that's helpful. Please tell me the date of the last night of your stay. Oh, that's easy. I stayed here last night. So I can factually say last night was the last night of my stay here.

7:10Until tonight, when that will be the next night that will be my last night of my stay tomorrow. I, I, I, one moment, please. I find a record for a Danny Hill crest that is a resident here at the Venus Arms. Wow. Two people with my name. A Danny duo. What are the odds of that? That depends on a number of factors. If you're curious about the odds of two people sharing the name Danny Hill crest, please tell me how wide of an area you want to search. It's okay, glabby. Let's leave that one a magical mystery. Knowing too many new things takes up the brain space I use for useless trivia. Hey, glabby. Did you know that astronauts can growingly get taller in space? Which means they can't grow wider. Well, there's your problem right there. Don't I know it? Let's return to the task of completing your reservation to help you while use a different reference point. Please tell me the day you will be checking out.

8:11Well, that's kind of dark, glabby. I don't like to think about things like that. Instead, I'll think about this. Did you know that a group of owls is called a Houses of Parliament? I didn't know that. And here is a doctorly medical fact. There are more bones in a human foot than in a human hand. But nowhere near as many thumbs. Very interesting. I love it. Now you tell me one. I do have one trivia item that was part of my training data set. Were you aware that the average person laughs about 17 times a day? They laugh about 17 times a day? I wonder what's so funny about the words 17 times a day. It must be a secretly inside joke. You know, glabby, I think the word hobnobbing is even funnier. People should laugh about hobnobbing instead of 17 times a day. No, did. Did you knowingly realize that apples are members of the Rose Bowl family? New token accepted. Your brain has a hippocampus, but no hippo students.

9:11Token accepted. Illinois is known as the land of Lincoln, Nebraska. The state flower of Florida is King Arthur. Even though their stage name was the righteous brothers, Bill and Bobby weren't actually righteous. Nobody ever stops to think about the fact that the name of the song they're singing is silent night. There's a group of people who actually think the Golden Gloves mean something. Voyager 6 was the first space probe to visit the Globe Theater, Planet Fitness, and Walt Disney World. I'd love to stay in chat some more, glabby, but I have to go to the movie theater and see the first few minutes of a double bill showing of Mean Girls and Mean Girls. I just have to figure out when to go back in to walk out a second time. Mean Girls released in 2004 has a run time of one hour and 37 minutes. Thanks, glabby. That'll give me enough time to go back out to the lobby and use the freeform jazz Coke machine to continue my mega-side quest challenge of creating every flavor combination there is.

10:15So far, I've done Coke and Coke and ice. Later. Thank you for staying with us. I've credited 146,000 room nights to your frequent bookings rewards account. With as few as 50 more room nights you will be eligible for a free bagel at our complimentary morning buffet. Well, we've learned two things today haven't we? First, your rewards program sucks. And second, either that guy goes or I have to yank this system out of here. Artificial intelligence is not ready to deal with whatever that was. Are you telling me that I have to choose between Danny Hillcrest or my AI front desk assistant? Danny? Or the thing designed to actually help me? Exactly. That's the choice. I see.

11:22Kyle? Kyle? Yes, Ms. Fallmucker? Danny Hillcrest called me this morning. He was very upset. I could barely understand him. Well, even more barely than usual. He said you got rid of someone named Glabby? Yes. And where's that fancy kiosk you insisted you wanted? Ms. Fallmucker, let's just say things didn't work out and never speak of this again. All right. By the way, I was noticing that the ceiling here in the lobby has gotten rather dirty. Do you think you could get up there and polish it? Well, this time around, AI was actually used in the creation of the episode. I trained a system how to do my Giles voice to add a touch of realism to AI Giles.

12:28In this episode, the part of Abby Fallmucker was played by Bonnie Kennedy. Other voices as well as story and music are by me. Clinton Allward, Copyright 2025, All Rights Reserved. Now next time, Detective Hart challenges you to solve another one of his heart stoppers. But for now, that's it. We're Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun. Bye-bye.