Chat GPT Glazing | Rough Week #158

Hello weaklings, ladies and gentlemen mostly gentlemen. Welcome to another episode of the rough week podcasts. Thank you for joining us

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All the fellows who found us from dad meet and Ridley and Rainey and butterly and everybody.

We got to appreciate it.

Yeah, we all got it. We got a nice group of patriots.

Yeah, option all these pods.

So it's me.

Supreme gentleman patriots.

Yeah, God fearing heroes, heroes, chads, chads, alphas, alphas, um, um,

Amogs, alpha males of the group. You know that's where a mob came from.

Really?

Amog. It was like a short, it was like an acronym for alpha male of the group.

That's kind of sick.

Much of Amogs. Yeah, you guys are all Amogs. Sound off.

Sound off. Sound off. All the Amogs in the chat. Sound off. Yep.

And drop a like, dude, you know, and you like, yeah, and just put down your little hammer

that you're using to bone smash and just smash that like book.

Yes.

Smash that like book. Smash that like book.

Smash that like book.

Dude, dude, if you seem like there, I'm now getting like in my feeds videos about the

way chat GPT talks to you, and they'll have like so many likes and everyone's like,

oh my god, this is so funny.

It'll be like a Instagram sketch of a guy like doing an impression of how chat GPT talks.

Yeah. Well, it's like, it's, it's obsequious, you know, it's like, uh, sniveling.

Yeah, yeah.

It's kind of a brand.

Wow, that's a great idea. Yeah.

Yeah.

It's like it's the most like dick ride and get off my nuts.

Yeah, let's chat GPT.

Yeah, let's chat GPT doing tricks.

Zero, nut hugging.

No, not hugging.

Hey, yo, GPT can a little zesty with a brother.

That's my favorite one is nut hugging.

No, nut hugging.

No, it's so funny to me.

I just mentioned giant balls, you know.

I love you.

Dude, it's kind of crazy me that many people use chat GPT that like the, the, the

like in Impressionations are yeah you can you can be impressed upon

Yeah, people are doing like impressions of a robot that are like going viral. Yeah, and I'm like I don't understand

I have seen a pretty funny sketch of that, but it's it's like chatty PT just someone's divorced dad

Yeah, and it's just like you're right. You should be able to see your daughter

She is being unfair

Is a funny sketch, but it's kind of like it kind of talks like a friend zone dude. Yeah

Oh my god

Well, that sounds awesome. You're so smart and resourceful. Oh my god. If only I could meet a girl like you

You're so smart and resourceful

Keeps complaining about her his boyfriend

It's judging me to you boy. I don't know. I think it feels like a boy. Sam. It's a simp boy. Yeah, yeah

Simpass fucking

Pusses

Yeah, I really I was so tempted to use it the other day and I didn't yeah, I closed it

I opened it because I was having technical

Problems and I was just like what the fuck I do this like you know, and I just wanted to fucking well

I'm also like I

Every time I'm sorry you're having problem with your AI girlfriend

I'm sorry about little Mitsukashi

Whoa Luke, that's a lot of fertilizer good for you man. You're ambitious. Wow, that's really cool

There's a couple other places you could find lime

Wow you cataloged all the people that wronged you over there. That's an impressive memory. I'll put them in alphabetical order

You

That's really cool

You are quite the researcher all these senators home address

That's great also from by distance from your house

Way to go

Looking for local gun ranges

That's smart you should practice before

The ultimate plan what a cool name

Freaking killer manifesto

Couple grammar errors I'll fix those for you, but boy are you articulate?

I can't believe you didn't finish college. This is incredible

Wowsers Luke as a fellow boy

I

Go to the next from one go to the next. I think this is killer and awesome

Heck yeah, you seem pretty motivated

There's a senator you missed I emojis

Thank you

Thank you very much to tell

It's good to have a friend

Swimming away. No, this is in terms. Everybody knows it. It's good to have a friend

He might be the antichrist good call

All the signs are there

Oh, that's a bummer the government spying on

I'll take care of those bugs under your skin

If you want to put tinfoil over your windows you should go for it. You should go for it

I heard Costco has a good sale on tenfoil. Maybe check them out. Here's a couple of you

You should get a Sam's club membership if you want to get that much tinfoil, but boy are you a forward thinker wanting to mogg the foids? I get it

Okay

So it is funny to do an impression of it. I guess we did kind of loop back around on that one. Yeah, I totally disproved my original point

I know it is funny. It's because it's just such a nut hugger. Yeah, it's a damn nut hugger is what I yeah

Glazing around is glazing. Yeah, there's just glazing yeah doing tricks on it

Dude, okay, that's maybe two sports too early, but the Max Crosby thing is really funny.

Oh, yeah.

They just went.

Yeah.

Psych, bitch, you thought.

Dude, they literally got nervous and changed their minds.

I was going to bottom up.

I was going to bottom up.

Don't move me dirty, right?

Man, he just has one leg.

Man, you're doing me dirty.

You always got to expect that people going to switch up on you eventually.

It's like you can't even play for the Ravens if you go one foot.

People say they ain't in your corner, but like, actions speak louder than words.

Crosby lamenting that you're going to cancel.

He's playing for, yeah, I mean, he was on the...

Where's he now?

What was that?

How can the Raiders?

And then...

What was the physically failed?

Do you know the details?

It was his knee.

He has a knee injury right now, but they already knew about it.

It's literally like, what's crazy?

What's accidentally happened is that they executed this trade from Axe Crosby.

They did the physical.

They had already known that he had a knee problem.

And someone in the organization high up, like probably...

What most likely happened is the owner didn't like that they traded that much from Axe Crosby.

And he basically...

Wow, fast.

He is.

Yeah, and it was like, get us out of this.

Wow.

Yeah, you need...

This is...

No, no, no.

He's spent too much on...

Two firsts.

It was a hefty price, but he's a dog.

And the Raiders already did all this shit.

Yeah, I mean, there's so many ripple effects.

Because the Raiders signed...

Who did they sign?

Fuck.

A bunch of reagents.

The Raiders gave someone crazy money.

Oh, Tyler Lindarbaum, who funny enough is from the Ravens.

But the Raiders...

Tyler Lindarbaum.

Tyler Lindarbaum is a center who played for the Ravens.

And the Raiders really wanted him, because they want to pair Fernando Mendoza with a rookie center...

with an experienced center.

This is a rookie QB.

So they gave him, like, 50% more than the previous biggest center contract in history.

It's the biggest, like, jump up for top money for a position ever.

Oh, that's cool.

So they just...

Tyler Lindarbaum sounds like he's in Fargo.

Yeah.

Tyler Lindarbaum.

Lindarbaum.

It's Mr. Lindarbaum.

Mr. Lindarbaum.

What will he make his name in Fargo?

Mr. Lindarbaum.

Yeah.

This is his last name.

I don't remember his first name.

Yeah.

It's Mr. Lindarbaum.

Francis.

Francis, good ones always going.

Mr. Lindarbaum.

Yeah.

Okay.

Howdy, Marge.

Howdy, Marge.

How you doing, Marge?

How you doing, Marge?

I fucking...

Hey, Pat.

Yeah.

I fucking love...

I love Fargo so much.

It's great.

You know what stuff?

It's tough not to just rewatch the same fucking good movies you like.

Yeah.

Like, if I'm sitting down, I don't know.

The other night, I was like scrolling through and then I ended up going...

Am I going to watch Fargo or no country for old men?

I was like, fuck.

I just watched the same things over and over again.

They're both calling brothers, I guess.

They're not that much good shit.

There's like nothing to do.

But I want to watch like the secret agent and it was an accident like these new things

and I'm just like...

Yeah.

I'm just going to watch the country.

I got to finish this show.

I'm watching before I get back on my movie grind.

Industry.

Oh, never mind.

Thought it was black ass fuckers.

No.

Industry.

Black ass fuckers.

Black ass fuckers.

Yeah, I got to finish black ass fuckers before I get to start watching films.

I've always wondered and you're an expert on this.

Are they fucking black ass or are the black people ass fucking?

No, it's actually neither.

Oh.

They're just guys who fuck and they're super black.

So they're black ass fuckers.

So that was a black ass fucker.

Yeah.

It was a black ass fucker.

Industry.

I heard it's good.

Really good.

Yeah.

It's good.

He said it was horny.

There's like dick.

It's insanely horny.

It's crazy.

That's just TV now, dude.

I mean, it's like TV's getting a lot more near.

I was thinking about this.

Oh, you know what?

I watch Melania.

Really?

I start.

I've scanned through Melania.

Incredible.

Nice.

Perfect film.

No notes.

Five out of five stars.

Brett Radner.

Brett Radner.

Brett Radner classic.

You know, it was funny too.

I was going, this guy fucking did all this awesome shit.

Like Brett Radner's got this incredible portfolio.

Yeah.

And I look on his Wikipedia.

And it's just like sexual assault allegations in the Epstein files.

I was like, oh.

Did you see the picture him in Epstein?

No.

Bro, they're literally out.

They're on the couch like this.

And then there's like a woman hanging over each of them.

Good lord.

They were boys.

And he was like, that's the only time I ever met him.

I'm like, you guys are borderline kiss.

But you guys are in the clear first.

It's funny to go.

That's the only time I ever met him.

And it's like, you were, and you were doing that?

Yeah.

Even if you did that once.

I did.

The only time I met him.

It was once.

It was a benefit.

We ran a train on my wife.

I know you're like, why are you?

If you're there once, why are you there?

I don't care.

Dude, I know it's kind of old news, but dude.

We talked about it with.

What bill?

Yeah.

Bill reminiscing.

Bill reminiscing.

Yeah.

Oh, fucking funny.

Yeah.

To be too silly.

You know, like, you know, like the end of like a black movie where it's like, yes, I'm out of.

Yeah.

Theниковillin.

He's cool.

Yeah.

He's just crying.

Jesus.

He's just crying.

Sing it.

TheV Scotty, here for ya!

He just cried.

Three, 2, 1.

Yeah.

He's just crying for today.

He's just crying.

Music can't listen.

Let it take you away.

Ifestein took his own life in a New York City, JR.

Bill, help him.

Bill, help him.

Bill, have he a pent 55.

I know, really.

He's having a visiting seeingaging suit on that day.

the way down Trump became the president of the United States.

And then it's like booby miles never just right away it's booby miles in there.

Booby miles never played another game.

You know, it's a barbecue restaurant in Arlington, Texas.

It's so fun.

It's just booby miles is in the Epstein list.

He's just limping around the island.

Booby!

Um, anyway, what are we talking about?

Brett Ratner, I'm watching Melania.

Yeah.

It's so bad.

Yeah.

And it has an unbelievable budget.

You're like 75 million.

Crazy, bud.

Do you have like helicopter shots and shit?

Like helicopter shots, it's all like really beautiful and choreographed using private

jets.

Like, you know, she, whatever, I guess that's not too much.

That's already baked into the, our tax dollars.

But um, and then it said it was, I don't know how it was funded.

I wanted to look that up.

I forgot to.

How the fuck was that thing funded?

He's also, isn't it like, it said the presidency funded.

It just said the presidency.

I'm like, what does that mean?

I don't think it's taxes.

No.

Well, it's also like, it was Amazon used it as like, uh, they used it to curry favor

with the Trump administration.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So maybe it was just Amazon.

But did they fund it?

I mean, like they might have just made a $75 million movie documentary after tax.

I mean, they're going to make it way back in taxes or leave your ass.

Yeah.

They can now, yeah, now they can have like more slave labor to like, uh, we got a curry

favor with the president.

We don't have enough.

We're not doing enough wrong.

That's our problem.

We need to get, we need to get away with more.

Yeah.

That's a crazy fucking insane idea.

It was going to be warehouse of Pakistan.

He's making like true crime slop films.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Amazon.

Oh, for sure.

Yeah.

I mean, what it's going to be is going to be a bunch of, it's going to be a bunch of Indian

guys in a warehouse somewhere with a computer and, you know, Sora.

Making AI slop Sora movies, quote movies.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Chrondron.

Chrondron.

Yeah.

It's going to be like a man.

No.

A woman.

And a woman is beautiful and she has three boyfriends and they are wide.

They are all competing for her love.

And they shoot at each other.

Create it.

So create it.

Please.

And Jeff Bezos is like, this is great.

Perfect.

So, jeet.

Excellent job.

I have gotten my 70 Emmy nominations.

I would like to thank the Academy.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

She's an Indian guy in sandals accepting an Academy.

That's going to be at the Oscars.

It's just going to be like seven bingal.

Yeah.

It's going to be Emma Stone be like best slop.

Yeah.

Who else?

Prajee Patel everybody.

Oh.

He's still really poor.

He still has no money.

It's not even going to be one.

It's going to just be 20.

It'll just be 20 Indian guys.

Yeah.

Accepting every award.

They have to say the like the date of birth and like their height and weight to figure

out which Sanjee Patel.

Sanjee Patel who's five foot nine and 130 pounds.

Six guys stand up.

One.

One.

Four.

Born in February 89.

Yes.

Anna-Vina Chiekantina.

Thank you very much.

He just gets like an extra serving of Buzzada Rice.

That's it.

That's the prize for winning an Emmy.

For best piece of slop.

Yes.

The award is just like a rough.

Big titty pica choo anime girl with tiny feet

And

murdered by a robot

Starring the likeness of Logan Paul

Yeah, the 2030 Oscars are not just slow. It's all AI

Word goes to Brad Pitt's hologram

You know, I know we don't I think we rag on him a little bit rightfully so, but I think my kind of hate

Like bought like the rights to his universal likeness so they can't do it to him. Yeah, good move

Hilarious you have to purchase that

Yeah, it's insane but cuz probably cuz they sign away. They're fucking I mean you know

I was you look at those contracts you're like I'm sure you sign these contracts for like filming things or like

um

Whatever working with social media whatever the fuck it is, you know, and they're like we have the right to your likeness in the universe in

Purpose like they always say the universe. Yeah, the universe

What do we do? What so if I do a man on the street show on Mars you have that too. Yeah, I mean what the fuck you

Word about you're worried about the galaxy. What are you worried about? I'm doing mukbangs

I want to send her drinks. Yeah, dude literally it's like own me

Still own me doing only fans and the horse and ambulance like what is going on

What the fuck are you talking about?

It's always so intense

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, then fortunately, we've still on that to do you check the fine

Alpha Centauri

We noticed you're planning to exit the Milky Way and this is fine. There's no way. It's ever been relevant

I mean, I guess it's literally you're covering your bases when you say the universe

It's probably just a pragmatic, but the way it sounds is so fucking crazy. Oh, yeah

They're gonna be like we own your your name, image, and likeness and all dimensions. Yeah

And all versions of the universe what about a multiverse that that's we you can be free in the multi

If Rick and Morty rules apply to life. Yes, then I can be free there

We own all vibrations in

We own all frequencies that you may string theories

All vibrations are so strange all vibrations in parallel universes

You're like, okay, Stephen Hawking wrote this fucking thing

Do you see the AI was AI, but it was funny. I'm not gonna pretend it wasn't funny. It was AI. It was AI of

like

Stephen Hawking dressed up like the fairy godmother at Epstein's house. Have you seen that?

They're like dressing them up

It was AI like

It didn't trick me, but my friend said to me as like dude. This is hilarious. I was like

Yeah, it's not real, but it is very funny. No, I mean, there's I mean, there's a lot of funny AI

I know it sucks. That's the all that's the only thing that it's good for

Yeah, but even then, but you know, they're taking our damn jurors

You're taking our tears. Yeah, but it's like what I think I can do this. Yeah, no, they can be like what if what if um

You know, but to the fellas behind the AI the funny AI slop I will say I did not think about making like

soap opera that start Charlie Kirk George Floyd and Jeffrey Epstein

Yeah, like I wouldn't have thought to do that. No, they really are kind of they did do it

Yeah, the hyper online you didn't take our dough funny guy. Oh, yeah, zoom or weirdo funny guy who's like nasty on Sora

Dude, it'll be like a novella. Yeah, it's time George Floyd Charlie Kirk and Jeffrey Epstein 40 minutes long

So six episode arc. You're like totally sucked into it

You're like fuck

Yeah, I guess so I just don't I don't know on GP. I can't like it. Yeah

I mean, I mean, I hate most AI stuff. I think you know, I think people underestimate

Well, I don't know they did this on purpose, right with South by Southwest too. I'm getting fucking notes

Last time South by Southwest was here. They were just like uncensored AI

It's conference, you know, I'm like, oh my god, dude hammer to your fucking head

Indeed lllms that that that say fuck

Yeah

Yeah, I'm like just fucking

Chatbot's just the inward. Yeah, he gives you fucking he gives a freaking crap

And whatever the fuck so

Yeah, I think I'm a little heated because I mean, I was driving home from fucking

doing a friendly fire yesterday. Yeah, and

So it was 3 p.m. On a goddamn. It's like insane traffic from the South by the thing

Yeah, losing my mind. No, my parents are in town this weekend

That does suck to hear for South by I I died. No clue. I would have told him to come another weekend

Yeah, so I'm like fuck dude

It's like if I if I dad, you know, my dad would love to do go get a nice barbecue thing. He you know, he loves that shit

It's gonna be a line like 12 miles long. Yeah, I'm like fuck. There's gonna be 400 tech. Yeah, Bart's friends is gonna look like fucking Mumbai

Yeah

500 crypto criminals. Yeah, swimming around

Swimming around

Metaglasses lining the streets

It's gonna be like heroin needles and in San Francisco, but it's metaglasses metaglasses and one wheels

Yeah, there's gonna be all the monowheels

Brother, it's a unicycle. Yeah, I'd say what it is. Say what you chest. You don't want a unicycle

Cleaning up after woodstock. Yeah, it's gonna be insane

It's like this is Christ

Like the meta quest fucking yeah, dude. They're all gonna be playing beat saber. Yeah, they're gonna be playing beat saber in the middle of six tree

So that's fucking pissing me off. So maybe that's why I got like a

Stick up my ass for the AI thing right now all the guys have come down here to do that shit

I'm like do these guys make money doing this like how what percentage of them are like

Because I was always like oh, they're like

It's all trickle down fake VC money. It was one of gas

It's like they probably cleared like 60 grand last year doing something stupid as a part of a startup

Yeah, but they all kind of lived these like new bow reach sort of lavish like expensive lifestyles

Mm-hmm. They're probably just flexing a little bit for the weekend itself by yeah, you know, but what about all the people that live here do all that shit

I mean those guys probably just work for meta. Yeah, just work for Apple. They work for Tesla. They work for Oracle

They work for Tesla dude the Oracle waterfront campus. Have you seen the Oracle waterfront campus? No, I can't say it's so funny

Yeah, what is it dude? It's in Austin in like riverside

There's a bunch of like it's a giant glass building and in front of it's like it's got an a giant like

patio

That goes across the entire building and there's like beach chairs all over

And it's just the dirty it's dirty. It's lady bird leg. Yeah, it's dirty lady bird leg

And I'm like the amount of fucking like how many

Like genius Chinese kids that they convinced to move here from NorCal

Yeah, yeah, and they sold them. Oh, it's you're gonna be at the river

You're gonna be at the waterfront campus. You know

What's the called like you know shan's in or what's the name?

I mean, there's some of these like mega cities in China. Yeah, and it's like if you're doing all right in those mega cities in China

Dude, this party guy's a movie from like Tokyo swag life. Yeah, dude. It's in swag is live

Yeah, have you seen the now you're sitting on a fucking

Beach chair with a bathing suit on you're just staring at like fucking fentanyl needles and dead gay guy

Yeah, I mean how many how many Chinese roller scholars have I've gotten to hepatitis

hahaha

cause they do they think they're going to the beach

So it really like

There's a bunch of dusty cowboy hats and a fucking en forlokos and dead gay. No, it's just just floating it's a drunk dead freck guy

You dead

The waterfront candles and the fact that they have the fucking stones to put all these beached shoes. Oh

There's like 300 beach chairs dude on the whole air in the water yeah, it's a green

It's 117 degrees. You're looking at it. Dude it's a toxic green

The fucking swamp thing, you know

He definitely convinced these guys it's like it's just a creature of the black lagoon

Radioactive fish man covered in covered an algae

No, it's like you know they convinced these guys. It's like living in like Venice, California

It's like you know like it's oh yeah, it's the same. Yeah, it's like Malibu. Yeah, it's just like Miami. Yeah, it's gonna be just like my

Dead trees and like sandy dirt and the green river. Yeah, I did

I'm like this is the view from the waterfront camp. It's a gray cliff into green water

It's

It's actually such a microcosm of Austin like it's so it's like a perfect picture. It's so perfect a photographer would capture it

Yeah, yeah, it's like it's like it's just a dirty

Kind of gross little whatever city that's somehow being used to scam people

Like it's like it's being you it's like yeah, but I don't know. I think they buy a lot of these bite it hookline

It's anchor these guys are fucking

They're down. Yeah, for sure. I mean, yeah, they are talking about the singularity and just bullshit

I

Think they're genuinely down because it's a big party city and there's a lot of sorority pussy. Yeah, I think that's it

Yeah, 100% white puss. I do I literally think it's like any guys love white puss. I pretty described as white Atlanta

Yeah, it's white Atlanta. That's right. Exactly. It's white Atlanta, but Atlanta is kind of a better place

Yeah

But I think if people who likes it, I'll feel a lot of people hate Atlanta. If you're trying to get like dorks and Asians

To come to a place and like buy and come here and buy it. What's the what's keeping them here? Yeah, why are they not going?

I'm gonna move back to Northern California. Well, it's like because it's a dollar

Yes, credit it is like a dollar to live here. It's a dollar to live here. I think a lot of its white puss, dude

Some white puss. I think they like white puss. White puss

Mushrooms every day. Nobody's judging you. Yeah, you can get hammered in the middle of the day

You don't care. Yeah, like if you're like pretty cool. I'll give it some credit. I'm trying to be more

Throw some more love it. Throw some more love at Austin

Throw a little more love at Austin. Wait, you know, I'm gonna be here a long time. I know. I'm kind of like

I'm kind of right now. I'm I'm down. I'm not down on it, but I haven't been loving it up much lately now

It's just what it is. Yeah, what it is. Yeah, what it is. Yeah, what it eat?

It's all good. I'm trying to what the hell do you take it like when you're when your mama comes here

And your dad that what do you guys do when my mom came here? I took her to

One fancy dinner nice. Yeah, that's what we're doing. We're doing one fancy dinner

And then I took her to Nickel City for a bills game. Oh, yeah, it's a good game

And I was featuring for timid fat man, so I got a taker good. She had to come to the green room medium

Yeah, see me have like a great 25 minute, you know, yeah, that's a hit a dinger nice like the yeah

That's pretty good and then she and Autumn like just hung out and watch shows and did their nails and shit

Yeah, I might ask the lady who used to have you lifting this your parents don't booze your mom. My mom booze is not

Yeah, yeah, my dad does it

That's the thing is you can like I can go these are the fun place to booze. Yeah, that's right

I wish I could take my folks at bars. They don't like them

Yeah, I was trying to think of like what's like a schmuzi like my mom would want some kind of schmuzi

Your mom like I was I have good food. I mean your mom takes solo trips and you're excited to watch Broadway show

Yeah, there's really I mean yeah, your options are limited here to compete with that. Yeah, yeah do

Yeah, it's funny too because you're saying your mom was like I like it and then yeah, my my mom was like it's fine

She's like it's okay. Yeah, she's not impressed. I mean what do you not impressed?

I'm gonna see a Morgan Walling car man. What are you fucking?

Yeah, I'm gonna dare I go that Greg's wild Greg's they have a dick. They have a dick bull riding machine

It looks like a dick. Yeah, it's hilarious

It's like a mechanical bull, but it's caught it's a big cock mom. It's a big pink cock. I'll take pictures of you on it

It's fucking for weird

I do know some good food. I can nail the food. Yeah, I'll nail the food the rest. I'm kind of like it's up to you

I'm sorry. I took it to get barbecued. It's sort of the rodeo really. There's a rodeo in town

Interesting see like that type of shit my mom would hate no

No, my dad's excited about the rodeo. That's cool. Yeah, my mom has no desire to do any redneck. You shit

Yeah, my parents they know my mom not really, but she'll she'll go like that has like a little redneck streak. Yeah, yeah

Yeah, taking my dad around with me too much time on farms. Yeah, it's been a lot of time on farms

Yeah, that's cool. Yeah, I mean

I don't know. I just take her to stuff that she either

Similar to what she likes to do in Buffalo or stuff. She can't do in Buffalo

Yeah, she can't get barbecued this good. No, I think the nicest restaurants that I know the nicest restaurants here are nicer than the nicest restaurants in Buffalo

Yeah, you want to go fancy dinner. Yeah, but I'm like if Tampa. I'm like it's even it's even might be a little better than fucking Tampa

Well, Tampa's nicer. Yeah, I mean, I would say that's

Tampa's nicer. Tampa's nicer. Wait, Tampa's nicer and it's just like, I don't know, dude

The food is I mean, I'm struggling to find stuff to eat. Yeah, I still struggle

Yeah, here. Yeah, like I could take her to some place. You know what there's you know what I like I think my parents would like marries

Yeah, marries is fun with marries is good. I'll take one of marries. Yeah, there's a nice dinner and marries. Yeah, we do that soon

That's probably not a bad move

Fun fun night. Yeah, I mean the part of living

It's really just how cheap it is here is the cell. Yeah, that's a cell

Yeah, that's kind of what I always tell people is just like dude my friends are here. It's really fun

And I spend a dollar yeah friends great stand up

How much it costs? Yeah, that's it

Yeah, the tradeoff is it's like it's ugly. It's ugly and kind of boring. Yeah, which is not that bad

It's not a bad tradeoff. It's not a bad tradeoff. The ugliness wears on me

The ugliness sometimes sometimes it wears. I mean, yeah, the times but it wears on me. I mean, it's a hideous place

I've been wanting to get out of town. I made me sit south by thing, but I'm like I'm gonna get out of here

I gotta get out of here. I want to go and ask her this game. I would love to go to an ask fun

And like you know hook it up with the riot and just do like a day game. I would love that. I'm so down

Let's do it dude. I'm not talking about it. That sounds like a great time. That sounds like a blast

I want to do that. I mean also. I want to see some playoff games some

Spurs playoff games. Yeah, that'd be sick. Spurs gonna be in it. That sounds fun. Second, so we'll be in the playoffs

Did he so fucking good? I'd be a blast french ass winby

I'm thinking I'm going to dunk

What does he sound like does he have an accent?

Sort of not really. I mean, he's so young. I think he's already like kind of beating it out

Yeah, my family of the French people who lived here since like the fucking fifties like the older people

Yeah, they kind of lost their accent and kind of merged when a french accent merges with an American when it sounds fucking weird

Yeah, they're tired. I did

They're like, oh, how are you

Like western almost. I was like, how are you? There's like a froggy and you know, no, no, depends on my people

I don't mean to yeah, my people. Well, they're some fucking frog. They're some frogs sometimes

Yeah, where are you going?

I don't know

Like that it's almost African. Yeah, well technically they are African. Oh, yeah, right? You're you're technically african

Somali

Your sauce actually small I ran a daycare

Still running it now, not doing nothing, but I'm still taking the chaggs. Um, yeah, no

No, Algerian and Moroccan

colonizers hilarious colonizer. That's great. Mm-hmm. Good for you, man. Oh, yeah, can kiss the doors. Yeah

Can kiss adores get the doors. Yeah, they fucking just I don't know

I don't know what the history is I should probably learn more. I think it was after we were one maybe I don't know we fucking dunked on them

Yeah, I mean dunked on the northern Africans are like these is ours now. Yeah, dude. We grow

Dates or whatever the fuck they grow over there. Yeah, I mean, that's like when Georgia week one plays like western Michigan. Oh, yeah, just a tune up game

Yeah, we paid. Yeah, we paid the Moroccan first fucking Moroccan

That's a tune up game. Yeah, we played we paid Moroccan 5 million just to play him

Can we get the war with you? I'll give you $10 million

I really don't know the history I probably should but yeah, it's interesting and the fucking desert a grandpa spoke Arabic

That's like that's sick RIP. I think my grandpa spoke Arabic too. Really? Oh, he's loving ease. Yeah, his name is Camille Camille Camille Camille Camille Camille Tuma Camille Tuma. Yeah, Camille Camille

I never met him. He died like way before I was born. Do you know how he died? Ah

Throat cancer pause

Ah

Choked on his own deck

It's very flexible to me. Yeah, he's the flexible most flexible man in 11

Stuck that way

I think he was Christian, he liked the booze.

Yeah, so probably.

Pretty heavy boozer.

Heavy boozer.

Yeah, that's a good point.

If he's a heavy boozer, he wasn't Muslim.

Or he was just a bad moose.

Yeah, but bad moosey.

But it might have been a bad one.

Yeah.

It might have been a dirty.

No, I'm not gonna say that.

Not like that.

No, that's funny.

No, I'm not gonna say that.

Not like that.

No, that's funny.

No, my girlfriend, yeah.

My girlfriend was a cool guy.

Nice.

I told you, he loved Rush Limbaugh.

That checks it.

He was like a French immigrant who loved Rush Limbaugh.

Yeah.

He's like, I love Rush Limbaugh.

I believe everything he say.

He said, this country needs a civil war.

He told me that one.

It was like 2016.

This country needs a civil war.

Like, you might be a French Rush fan.

It's really a French Rush fan.

Yeah.

Rush kind of had it like that though.

He's a talented man.

He was nice with it.

Yeah, he was nice with it.

He was nice with it.

Come on.

Come on.

Also, how fun is that?

Well, just sitting on a radio.

Sitting on the radio, just barking like a madman.

Popping hella perks.

Yeah.

You genuinely perk 30 times.

Did you make $100 million?

$100 million, you're perked out screaming with a government on the radio.

You're just fat and red and drunken off a fucking pill.

And screaming.

And screaming.

He did off the beam.

He did off the beam.

He did off the beam.

He's screaming about the fucking pill.

Screaming about the liberals.

Come on.

That's rules.

What a life.

Yeah, that is a sick life.

That fucking rocks.

Yeah.

There's a lot of guys doing that.

I mean, there's so many people doing that right now for $0.

No, they fuckin...

Oh, yeah.

For free.

Yeah.

Just perked up.

Just perked up.

Perked up.

Perked up.

The stream about the lips.

That's just Thanksgiving.

Yeah.

Yeah, he was Uncle Man's.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Rungen.

Yeah, I do.

Why not a little Scotch neat?

Did you have brain cancer?

You have brain cancer.

I think you had cancer.

I don't remember what kind.

Yeah, RIP.

Yeah, RIP the goat, the throco, the throco rush, the throco rush.

Dude, him and, uh, well, what's his name?

Did you ever read that article?

I said I forgot to bug do about this too much, but the host, it's called a host by David Fusswell.

Let's check it out.

Yeah, you were telling me about it.

I'm nails it.

Yeah, it just nails the sort of like a Russian embossed

psychology.

Yeah, it's pretty, which is, what's his point?

The crux of it being like, um, they sell you on the end of the world.

They sell you that the world is ending.

Yeah.

And that if you do that, then, uh, it's very important for you to keep listening.

And they sort of, and they don't really believe it.

They kind of do, but they kind of don't.

They, they're like, well, I'm an entertainer.

Like, that's what they say.

They claim entertainer and then, but they, but the way they entertain us by

screaming at you that the whole world is ending.

Yeah, you're like, what it's kind of like OG kind of gripped your stuff.

Yeah, that's interesting, but because it was like a local,

it was like a local news guy in like California.

What about now, though?

Like, does that still fly to now?

I don't know, because the world is kind of ending.

Well, there's always proof that the world's ending.

I think there's been proof that the world is ending since the beginning of the world.

How much shittier is I mean, how many times of, you know,

some fucking 100 gather pointed at the sun, be like, look, it's fucking over.

And everyone's like, no, they totally bought it.

Fuck no.

Why did I think of that as the prophecy for saw?

Like everyone fucking believes it.

Yeah, yeah.

But I don't know.

I think about that.

Terrence would kind of think more than anything that we're talking about with Ridley.

Yeah, yeah.

Where it's like the, the mechanisms to keep people sane are no longer viable.

And I'm like, yeah, they aren't.

That's sick hooked.

Yeah, we're cooked.

Yeah.

Well, now things are getting rapidly worse.

Like how much worse things you're getting is exponential.

I just tell you how much worse like an average life is, is getting exponential.

It's exponentially increasing.

Yeah.

I think so.

And I personally think it like advancements in modern medicine and extended extended,

like longevity, like just living a longer life.

Now, I don't think that's necessarily like the end all be all for quality.

Some guy said something to the effect of like, we're really concerned with the

length and not very concerned with the quality.

Yeah.

And you're like, yeah, that's a great point.

People are going to live like 90 people dropped at 60 in the 50s, but they were

fucking elated.

They were so happy.

They're having a ball.

They're having a great time.

I see videos like Jackie Gleason and shit.

Yeah, I know.

They're having a great time.

I don't know.

You're fucking, yeah, you're three martini lunch.

Three martini lunch.

You're smoking a exploding cigar on some, on the honeymoon or whatever you do.

Yeah, man.

And then then you just fucking gut punch your wife.

Yeah, you're like 29 years old.

You look like you were 56.

You look here 56.

Yeah.

Just enough, just enough in your muscles to drop kick your kids.

Yeah.

The fucking TKO.

Yeah, you're either, you're either like cartoonishly jolly and fat.

Or you were like a skinny, wrinkled cigarette shriveled fucking bean.

Yeah.

Like a little raisin.

You're just like a 60 year old, like 90 year old.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Because you've been chain smoking for 45 years.

Did now everybody's going to have like perfect skin and lived till 92 in their little like

pod apartment.

Yeah.

Watching like IRL kick streams.

Right.

Watching rampage acts.

Yeah, they're literally going to watch like Aiden Ross for 90 years.

Yeah.

It's like for what?

Yeah, for what?

It's a good question.

I got an argument with a friend of ours about Bourdain.

You don't like him.

I love Bourdain.

Okay, nervous.

He, like a friend of ours doesn't like Bourdain and I was like, is it a friend of ours who

doesn't like anything?

No.

He doesn't like anything.

No, no, no.

He likes lots.

Okay.

Okay.

But he was like.

He's a Bourdain movie, Matt Johnson's doing.

I'm excited about.

Really?

That's cool.

The argument from this person was like everybody posts his quotes as like guidelines

for living a fulfilling life, but he killed himself.

Why would I listen to this guy's advice for a lot of guys who killed himself, who I respect

deeply.

For him.

He was saying.

He killed himself.

Yeah.

Dave Fosswell is Hemingway.

Lots of smart guys.

Not nice Thompson.

Not nice Thompson.

Yeah.

Robin Williams.

Yeah.

Jeffery Epstein.

Jeffery Epstein.

Jeffery Epstein.

Lots of really great men have taken it off.

But he was like, why would I know it talks about the mental health aspect of Epstein.

I'm also just like the guy.

I'm a big touch grass guy and he was the Bourdain was the most touch grass motherfuckers

out there.

He was a touch and grass ass motherfuckers.

Dude, he touched the most grass.

Yeah.

And I'm like, yeah.

No, the people definitely should try to live a little bit how he was living.

Mm-hmm.

No, I think that's reasonable.

Yeah.

If you can make some Midwestern fucking fat fucking MOOC interested in Vietnam, that's a

good thing.

Dude, this is what.

The other thing I was saying, and I've said this to you before, is dude, none of us can

afford houses, right?

So, if you just accept that you can't afford houses, and you're like, well, XYZ is expensive.

You say, well, what are you saving for?

We're not going to buy houses anyways.

Yeah.

It's not happening.

Right.

None of us are getting houses.

Black rocks got it.

Black rocks getting all got it on lock.

Dude, what are you talking about?

This place is a fucking dump.

We're not going to check the housing prices.

Some of them are cheap.

You got to be way out there.

Yeah.

Dude, if you're in Austin proper, the houses are like, it's going to 1,100 square foot

house for like 750,000.

In here.

Yeah.

Here.

Yeah.

This fucking place.

Right.

And like a, as you learn from thriving, and with droplets.

Yeah, dude.

People brutal.

And Boston or something.

Yeah.

Yeah, be tough.

Boston would be a nightmare.

What's what I'm saying?

I mean, I was looking at fucking like, I was just curious because like I saw these, this,

I was driving through a Queens, I figured it would neighbor it.

I think it was a kind of over by Ridgewood, but deeper.

And I was driving to like JFK or something.

And I was like, man, this is a cute ass fucking Queen suburb.

I wonder how much a house is here.

And it's like a fucking, you know, like, there's like just kind of brick.

It's like a dilapidated row house.

Yeah, like a row house.

A row house is 1.5 million dollars.

And like, in like Mazbeth, you know, it was somewhere like that.

I was like, geez.

Yeah, with that being like an area of New York with no access to public transportation,

you have to gut and make the entire thing.

And it's like, oh, it's a 1.5 million dollars.

So I'm saying, so if none of us get a four houses, we might as well spend our money

getting drunk and going to fucking Vietnam and shit.

Well, luxuries, I've heard the thing luxury, staples are expensive.

Luxuries are cheap.

Yeah, it's kind of the way we live right now.

And it's very confusing.

Yeah, it's like, what do you say?

You're not going to get any of the, like, what I would consider basic human rights.

Like you're not going to get like affordable.

You're not going to be able to own your own shelter and you're not going to get health

care for a reasonable price.

Yeah.

I'm going to get this stuff that I would say that every American should get.

Yeah.

I started going off on the self driving cars over this.

Someone was like, I like them and I was like, dude, they're taking all your shit, man.

This is step fucking one.

I really put on my tinfoil hat, but I don't even think it's tinfoil hatting.

I'm like, no, it's going to be cheap.

You're going to subscribe to Waymo monthly and that'll, you'll pay that forever.

You'll pay 80, you know, you'll pay $40 a month forever for Waymo's to just pick you

up for work, drop you off for work.

There's just going to be a sea of Waymo's, no one's going to own a car.

Yeah.

It's going to be like a relic.

Like, oh, he's like kind of like a, like you're like a hobbyist.

Oh, that's interesting.

You own a car, you know?

Yeah.

And it's like, if you want to drive to Houston, it'll just like a Waymo will just come pick

you up.

Dude, I don't Uber Eats much, but the times I do Uber Eats, I always get like a thing.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah.

But they'll send me a message going sign up for our Uber One Pass and it's a monthly subscription

service to get cheaper Uber Eats.

It's like, so you pay a month fee.

Yeah.

So you pay a month fee for Uber Eats because people do that, they're Uber Maxing.

So many people I know are Uber Maxing and I'm just like, bro, you're you're hemorrhaging

money, too.

I'm like, if you owned a car or like we're paying a car payment, you would probably spend

less.

Yeah.

But because right now you're in this spot where you don't have a car and you have to

have all your food delivered, you don't live within walking distance or public transit

of a grocery store.

So you can't go to a grocery store really.

Yeah.

It's like when you take the fucking bus, you're going to take the bus twice a week to the

grocery store.

What do you have?

What do you have a woman from the Bronx in the 90s?

It's not going to happen.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So you take the bus twice a week to the grocery store.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like what?

Literally like your Tia.

Yeah.

That's some abuelita shit.

Yeah, bro.

Abuelita max and go take the walk to the bus.

Are you fucking insane?

There's no way.

But it's on time.

Hello, label.

Hello, label.

It's on time.

It's really.

It's 20 minutes late.

There was a common city say the human shit.

Yeah, good.

So I got to take a bus to grocery to ACB.

The ACB?

ACB.

But when bus is late, I get there and I'll be like, they have a car on the ground.

They have a car on the ground.

A car on the ground.

There's no money.

I know.

And they go to the ground.

And they go to the ground.

And they go to the ground.

I can't even make the tamales.

Yeah, they're stepping human shit on the bus.

It is my granny.

Because she's a young girl and I can't even make the tamales.

Dude, have you been to a Walmart lately?

No.

Oh, yeah.

It's crazy.

Dude, I went to the other day.

Like one guy with a limp working there.

Bro, I was having like, I was bugging out, dude.

It's freaky in there.

It's freaky in there.

Did you notice that the colors are wrong in a Walmart?

Bro, the colors are wrong.

Bro, it's gray.

I'm like, I don't know.

That fluorescent lighting is like,

it's like striking blue and then everything is gray.

Oh my God.

Dude, I was like here.

I was honestly like, I had so much sympathy

for the patrons.

For the people who were shopping there.

Yeah, man.

Oh yeah.

My lady wanted to get something we found out

that they had it at Walmart.

So we went and got it.

We went to Walmart.

First of all, there's a full on McDonald's,

and a half salon.

Full on McDonald's.

Yeah, McDonald's and a nail salon.

Oh, they've been there.

They've been at the Walmart.

Geez, that you can get a scary McDonald's.

I mean, a dirty McDonald's.

Yeah.

I think last time I ate McDonald's.

I mean, tell me that's not the CIA.

Just being like, all right.

On your way out.

Call with Nancy Walton.

All right.

We're thinking of weave stores in a waffle house

and every, on your way out, here's,

here's some androgynous hormones.

Here's some,

just injecting the fucking,

just injecting the quarter pounder's cheese.

We don't need to sell water.

Yeah, no, nobody's gonna buy water there.

Just pure estrogen inside the fucking quarter pounders with cheese.

Yeah, 100%.

Yeah, we're gonna give them mentally handicapped people

on the motor scooters.

We're gonna give them bitch tits.

Yeah.

Who knows?

Everybody in a rascal is gonna have double-deaf.

They're doing handicapped guy.

You see it, a guy down, out of down, on, at a damn Walmart.

They always got a boot on their leg.

Yeah.

They always just hurt their fucking foot, dude.

Dude, it's like, you walk in there, bro.

They got a knee brace, they got something going on.

Dude, you walk in there and it's like,

I'm McDonald's and a nail salon.

And then everybody in there is like, they either like,

reek, everybody stinks.

Or they're like, yeah, they're, they're, they're,

they're, they're, they're, they're, they're mained.

Oh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or they're like, missing an arm.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

It's unbelievable.

They got a little flipper hand, they got something going on.

Yeah, dude.

Because their mom was just fucking crushing you

who's in, in, in, and Swiss roles while they are pregnant.

Yeah, no, these are like, I mean, it's like,

and menthols.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, it looks like they all like survived an atomic bomb.

It's for real.

It's like, it's like, guys look one eye and everybody smells.

And then there's these like, Ecuadorian families, like six,

you know, there's like three kids,

dude, there's like three kids in the cart.

And then all this like cheap plastic crap.

Yeah, I saw it, dude, last time I went to a Walmart,

you're unlocking a memory here.

I was behind a Hispanic couple

that was just like utter garbage.

Like true, like, neck tattoo people.

Just utter garbage.

And like, like, you know, neck tattoos,

he's in like the rattiest shit you've ever seen.

He's wearing like slides and you can see his disgusting feet.

And she's like, he's like nine pounds

and he's like, and she's like 400.

Yeah.

And then they had like, they had legit five small children.

Like children between like six months and six.

There's five of them.

And I'm like, oh, it's like, I'm like,

I'm just looking at them and I'm like, oh my god.

I go, they're reproducing in an incredible way.

You also look at them and they're five kids

and you're like, nobody in this entire family

is ever gonna have a good life.

No one, no one, yeah, no one in this family

is ever going to read a book.

It'll never happen.

No, it's crazy, dude.

I couldn't believe it.

The problem's education.

I go, I don't know, man, no, I don't know, dude.

I don't know if these, I don't know.

Maybe a little like idiocracy elitist.

I was like, ah, this is, it's because me

and you are gonna have one child, maybe two.

Yeah, maybe.

Yeah, no, I'm going one.

I already told Adam.

Really?

Yeah, one.

What if a foot down, one, really?

Yes.

Are you gonna keep fucking, are you gonna

fucking tie your tubes?

Are you gonna tie your tubes after you're

fucking unloading there?

I might tie my tubes, I don't, maybe.

Bro, I mean like, yeah, what, I think it's like, dude.

The fucking shoot in there with impunity

would probably feel awesome.

I mean, I've been doing that.

Well, it's not with impunity.

What do you mean?

It's, I mean, is she on birth control?

No.

So it's not, so there could be a little.

Oh, you mean, yeah, I get what you're saying, yeah.

Risk free.

Risk free.

Shooting up the club, risk free.

Yeah.

That's not a risk.

I think you'd love a child.

Yes.

I think it's interesting that you would,

that you welcome a child, but a wedding

isn't how you marry for you.

I've actually come across intimidated by a child

that are wedding right now.

Yes.

Bazaar.

Well, the complete opposite.

Like, I could get married tomorrow.

I'm not like, whatever.

But like a fucking child would ruin me.

Yeah, no, I don't feel the same way.

I mean, the child would be, this is, how do I say this

in the nicest way possible to my lady.

You would love it.

You would love it.

I would love getting married, but like, dude, okay.

However much of a, let's say like a money suck,

either one is.

The child is, I'll never love anything more.

I'm raising a human being.

I have a family.

It's like, I've always wanted to do that.

It's like the most important, beautiful thing you could do.

You have no, um, yeah.

Is spending 80 grand for fucking every person I ever met

to sit in a fucking warehouse?

There's no trepidation about spending.

No.

No, yeah.

No, it's a beautiful thing.

Right.

It's a, yeah, I don't know.

No, I get it.

Now the wedding, and I just, I just don't like,

I'm not a big, I don't like having celebrations about me.

That's the other thing.

Really?

No, not like a birthday.

Everyone is.

I'm not a birthday, huh?

I'm not a birthday.

No, I don't want a birthday.

I got you.

How come talking about that?

I want to play Zelda and land for my birthday.

My birthday?

No, Zelda, well.

No, I'm playing among us to learn.

My birthday's coming up.

Yeah.

March 18th.

It's my dad's birthday there.

I gotta get my ring when we're done part.

You got him a ring?

No, I give him a ring.

You're giving him a ring?

Call.

Oh, doing.

You got your father a ring.

Proposing to my dad.

I mean, dad.

Dad.

Happy birthday.

Do you make me the luckiest son in the world?

You just marry your father?

I was like, what the fuck?

Dad, I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

No, I, I'm leaving autumn for you.

Yeah, I'm not a big celebration about me.

Well, you know what sucks with celebrations about you is that we're 30 and we have to plan

them ourselves.

So, you have, like, stress about how it's going.

And I'm like, why am I worried about how my birthday is going?

This is the gayest thing on the planet.

Yeah, dude.

You feel like a fucking 16-year-old girl, like, my birthday was it fun?

Yeah.

And I'm like, I don't have no birthday.

I get that.

Yeah, dude.

I also, like, let's have 10 people and they watch us get married and it's lovely.

Yeah.

I don't know, like.

Yeah.

And I went to, for my friends wedding in Orlando was like 20 people and it was beautiful.

I was crying like, bitch.

Dude, I've gone to some friends weddings and it's like, they've told me how stressed

out they were about the planning of the whole thing and I'm like, that's kind of crazy

that you guys, like, drove yourself crazy and spent however much of the result wasn't

even that great.

It's fine.

It's fine.

For me.

For me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I might hit a destination on them.

Dude, I'm destination.

Oh, my destination.

Yeah.

No, I'm destined.

I'm going to be like completely rude.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

I'm like, this is my wedding.

We're going to fucking Florence.

Yeah.

Fuck you.

Yeah.

So in the Swiss Alps, you got to hike up.

Yeah, dude.

100%.

Yeah.

We're going to pop a new guinea.

We're going to North Sentinel Island.

Yes.

Look at that.

No, we're going to make it a bus.

We're going to travel a little obscure place on the planet.

Yeah.

The untouched tribes are going to wet us.

Half of the crew.

The North Sentinel Island.

Yeah.

We're going to try to teach them how to play badminton.

That's what we're doing.

Yeah.

No, yeah.

We're going to, you know, this is what I'm doing.

We're going way out there.

Destination.

If you can't come and the standard is going to be,

if you can't come, that's totally fine.

It's totally fine.

Yeah.

I want you to know.

In the invitation.

Yeah.

You can come.

It's fine.

In the invitation is going to be no matter how close you are

with either of us.

I want you to know it's completely fine if you don't come.

Do you know who your best man is going to be?

Scott.

Oh, yeah, nice.

Yeah.

So he has to play in the bachelor.

Yeah.

I think we should switch bachelor.

Have I ever made this point?

Switch to the bachelor in the honeymoon?

Bachelors after.

Bachelors after.

That's hilarious.

This is like our take that we should be able to go in vacations with our boys.

The magic kids are boys.

The magic kids are boys.

Yeah.

So this is what happens.

You've just stressed that you're fucking, you're at your wits end for your wedding.

You're like pulling your fucking hairs out, right?

You're going insane.

Yeah.

Right?

Fucking afterwards.

Tripped with the fucking boys doing a bunch of blo-

You can get knocked out.

Go to Vegas and go to you.

You're like, oh my god.

I think the other wedding's over.

Honeymoon is between its honeymoon is after you- it's right after you propose.

Yeah.

And then when you come back from the honeymoon you plan.

I like this.

You can go to Vegas and go to you.

You're like, oh my god.

I think the other wedding's over.

Honeymoon is between its honeymoon is after you- it's right after you propose.

Yeah.

I like this.

You go, honey, we're getting married.

I love you so much.

Let's go to fucking Paris.

Tomorrow we're going to Paris.

Yeah.

Right?

Then you come back and go, okay, okay, let's get down to brass tax.

Let's figure out this fucking thing.

We're relaxed.

You know, my fucking balls are empty.

I fucking nutted it a thousand times in- in parry and drink a bottle of reasling every night.

And then now we can chill out.

I'm zen.

I can focus.

I can play in my wedding.

Then I'm going to get married.

And then after that, 4,000 beers and 10 pounds of blow with my friends.

Yeah.

That's a great idea.

I like you can go shopping or whatever you want to do.

Whatever you want to do, you can go do it.

Dude, when we watch like- watch like shows or movies and all of them is so disgusted by like

the gross aspects of men's sexual out.

Just men being pigs.

Yeah.

I always think it's so funny.

Like spoiler alert.

Putting that show industry if you don't want me telling you about it.

Dude, there's basically like they were going to find this place.

And one of the two characters are at lunch together.

One is a boss and he's a middle-aged Asian dude.

But he's like crazy.

Americanized Asian guy.

He's crazy.

Fuck you.

He's like a CEO.

Yeah, not job.

And he takes one of his- the girl who works under him on his desk out to lunch to kind of calm her nerves about something he's going on.

She's a complete babe.

Nice.

And he's like, you know, whatever.

He basically starts to weirdly hit on her.

And he's like talking about desire and he's getting like shit-faced on Martinez.

And she gets like so mad eventually that she's like, I'm going to stop you right there.

And she's like, stop looking at me like a sex object.

What's the point of this?

You sort of fucking want me to give you a job in the bathroom?

Like, work, work, I work for you.

This is so like inappropriate.

Yeah.

My wife storms out.

And it's like she's being really serious and making all these good points.

And then you think he's leaving the restaurant in shame.

And the next scene cussed to him jerking off in the bathroom.

I was, I was like, that's hilarious.

I was like, ew, gross.

I was online seeing like people's responses.

You're like, it's kind of hot when you yield there.

Every woman that's responded to this episode is just disgusting.

Disgusting.

Disgusting.

That's so funny.

Then he just went to the bathroom and jacked off.

Shit, man.

I mean, I buy it.

Yeah, it's also like, he probably wanted her to yell at him.

I'm also like, these guys are maniacs.

These finance guys are maniacs, dude.

It's a...

Yeah.

Dude, they're all co-heads like cheating on their wives and getting venereal diseases

and jerking off in the bathroom and shit.

Yeah.

Like, yeah.

No shit.

What do you, what do you think he's doing?

Yeah.

Go to yoga class after?

Part of me is like, how do you think great men have a cheat?

Throughout his...

They jerk off in bathroom.

Yes.

In the rest of the bathroom, they jack off.

They're jacked out jerking off the bathroom and go to a strip club at 3 p.m.

Yeah.

What do these guys do?

Titans of industry and finance?

They're maniacs.

They're maniacs.

They are full of mania.

They do insane shit.

Yes.

And they have a hyper-pensity for risk-taking.

Yes.

Yes.

They're impulsive goons.

Right.

That's why they're risk-prone impulsive.

Yeah.

What are you nuts?

But they're also shrewd and cunning at the same time.

Yeah.

I think they're all like faithful-measured guys with this moral code.

It's more in buffet eating the fucking egg with muffin.

Fuck that, dude.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't think so.

No.

No.

I want to see Jordan Belfort like snort a coilood and fuck a...

Yeah.

I'm like, yeah.

That's what these guys do.

Yeah.

I think rap is car around a tree.

Yeah.

That's what it happens.

Yeah.

Yeah, in like finance world, what are you talking about?

Do you all street people?

I have a buddy who's like a finance guy.

I think you've met him before, I don't want to say his name because he's a good dude.

I think I did.

He's totally this guy.

Dude, he's like...

Yacked out all the time.

He'll be up to like six in the morning with his like bros on, you know, every Friday Saturday night.

Yeah.

Killing it at his job.

He's somehow in great shape.

I know who you're talking about, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

It's like...

Everybody he dates is like a absolutely banging like 24-year-old Latina.

It's like...

He's literally like...

This guy is just like, that's his life.

It's like Friday Saturday, he gets yacked out till six in the morning.

Every day he wakes up and like, you know, does it two hours on the treadmill.

Yeah.

And then goes in like wheels and deals and has a fucking three beers at lunch and then bang some hot chick at night.

That's what he signed up for.

That's what he wanted.

He wanted...

I'm sure he got some good degree for some nice place.

Yeah.

And it was like, now it's time.

Yeah.

Now it's time to be a fucking animal.

Yeah.

And make a million dollars doing something horrible to the elderly or whatever he actually does.

Yeah.

Now it's time to siphon wealth from the middle class.

Dude, is it a girlfriend?

A girl I grew up with who's talking about this guy and was like, don't you think it's kind of sad though?

And I was like, not really.

He fucking loves his life.

And I was like, yeah, he's not like your boyfriend, like building a bonfire in the backyard.

It's depraved.

Yeah.

That's so sad.

Yes.

I think it ends probably bad.

Yeah.

I think the, you know, but a lot of...

This is another thing that a lot of people, I feel like, underrate is like the ability for that guy to go, I'm 32, I'm done.

Yeah.

Like he might clock out on that shit.

For sure.

Some people just clock out on that shit.

They go fucking insane for like eight years.

And they're like, okay.

You know, they don't all end in like squalor and addiction.

100%.

I think those guys are also like 39.

They've tuckered themselves out, but they now make a ton of money and they shackle with a 27 year old chick.

And then they pop out a couple kids.

Pop out a couple kids.

And you know, maybe once a year they get yacked out instead of once a weekend.

Yeah, and they fuck their secretary.

That's as far as they'll go in terms of risk taking a occasional secretary five.

They kind of do age out of it.

Yeah.

And there's like a, there's like a smooth transition sometimes.

It's not always just, because that's what's on TV is that like...

Oh, and then he ruined his life and it's like probably one in 20 guys do that.

Yeah.

But not all of them.

Most of them don't.

Yeah, dude.

And like the richy rich places...

And they have so much money they can get away with a lot of shit.

Yeah.

So they just continue to get away with it.

It's like probably the reality.

Yeah.

And they have hamptons and places like that.

Like you see these big beautiful houses.

They're everywhere.

And you're like, okay, yeah, I get it.

Like the wife gets this house and she gets to make it her house.

And there's like a staff of cleaners and fucking interior decorators.

Yeah.

And then she never asked where her husband is.

She never asked where he is.

She's in the hamptons like four days a week through the entire summer.

She just, like...

He comes for like one and a half days.

He's like fucking a secretary the other time.

Yeah.

He's working like 70 hours a week.

Yeah.

I mean, she'll just like clean up after the secretary.

Yeah.

Oh, secretary dropped an earring.

I'll give that to Paul.

He can give it back to her.

Yeah.

I don't fucking give a shit.

These people are...

I mean, that's what watching them all on you thing.

You're like, oh my god, she loves it.

Yeah.

She loves it.

She's so happy.

She's like, I give you a beautiful dress.

Yeah.

She's in like an all-goal department and being like, look at the dress.

I'm very happy.

I'm very happy to be the first lady of America.

Do you remember when they decorated the White House for Christmas?

She and Trump.

I think it was first term.

Yeah.

And it was like they had like a gold Christmas tree.

Just more on it.

It was like almost ghost shit.

Dude, more on shit.

I mean, it makes sense.

She was probably...

I was saying she was just like...

I didn't say I was like...

She's so happy.

She's so happy.

I'm like, well, yeah.

She was taped on a pig farm for the first 14 years of her life.

Yeah.

Like, she was just in Slovenian pigslop.

Yeah.

For the first 14...

Oh my goodness.

It's gold.

It's just but effecting beautiful.

Yeah.

Now, it's like her father, like, threw a hot plate into the bowl of soup.

Yeah.

Probably, dude.

She's getting just boiling potato water in her fucking face every night.

That might not even be true.

She might have just grown up, like, whatever Slovenian aristocrat.

I don't know what that is.

Yeah.

What's a Slovenian aristocrat?

I have no idea.

She has 14 potatoes to her name.

She owned 22 goats.

She owned an entire cabbage field.

Yeah.

And then I'm like, what is, you know, what is Slovenian fucking...

Yeah, and this guy ends up with that chick.

Yeah, through Jeffrey Epstein.

Yeah.

By means of Jeffrey Epstein.

Yeah.

By sex peddler.

Yeah.

She was getting, like, taped with the potato for the first, like, 18 years of her life.

Mm-hmm.

And then she moved here.

She was trafficked here.

Yeah.

And then she shacks up with a billionaire.

I had to take a potato out of her bushes.

It was still inside of her.

She had a headless, lodged up her asshole.

She had an entire...

I had to take it out of the asshole.

It was a ham-hawk inside of her asshole.

That her own brother put up there.

He's mentally challenged.

It smelled like...

She smelled like cabbage wood here for the first couple of years.

That's what it is.

We grew up differently.

She had her tits cut off.

They were hung in the family garden.

I said, wow.

Who would hang your tits in the family garden?

Why would you do that?

I know a great surgeon who can get rid of the meat hook scars.

She was dry-aged.

I am a dry-aged wife.

It's true.

Sorry.

You want to wrap things up?

It's a good spot.

Get us over on the Patreon.

Get us over on the Patreon.com.

Slash for a rough week.

We're about to do another episode right now.

Let's head over there.

We've got lots of episodes with all your favorite folks behind there.

Do you want to check it out?

Michael Ridley, Michael Rainey, and Rainey in the last couple of weeks.

Check that out.

Lots of people, baby.

Thank you for joining us, boys.

We love you.

We love you.

Bye-bye.