Chapter 51: The Vaults of St Dunstan's

0:00CHAPTER 51. The Vaults of St. Dunstins A ponderous stone was raised in the flooring of St. Dunstins Church. The beetle, the church-warden, and the workmen shrunk back, back, back, until they could get no further. "'I, eh, an orchid smell,' said the beetle. Then the plain-looking man who had been at Sweeney Todd's advanced. He was no other than Sir Richard Blunt, and whispering to the church-warden he said, "'If what I expect be found here, we cannot have too few witness witnesses to it. Let the workmen be dismissed.'" As you place, Sir Richard, for what an awful whiff! Stanchonaries! I have no doubt they won't be sorry to get away, and my men is after Crownview, going to get something to drink and come back in an hour. "'I, your owner,' said one of the men. And sure, by slight Patrick's bans, we want something to drink. For the stench of the church, dig some more busted fruit like a meribound so it does. Get out,' said the beetle. "'I'll hit slow people and high-rush. Hang her on her,' cried one of the men, and sure by St. Patrick's bans, we want something to drink. For the stench of the church, dig some

1:03of my blessed throats like a meribound so it does.' "'Get out,' said the beetle. "'Ah, it's slow people. I am high-rush. I think no more bails and nothing in the world.'" The workmen retired, laughing, and when the church was clear of them, the church-warden said to Sir Richard Blunt, "'Did you ever, Sir Richard, smell such a hoard-channel household of stench as comes up from that opening in the four-of-the-old church?' Sir Richard shook his head, and was about to say something, when the sound of a footstep upon the pavement of the church made him look round, and he saw a fat, Percy-looking individual approaching. "'Oh, it's Mr. Vickley, Overseer,' said the beetle. Oops, as you're as well, Mr. Vickley. There's an oard smell. "'God bless me,' cried the Overseer, as with his fat finger and thumb he held his snub nose. "'What's this? It's worse and worse.' "'Yes, sir,' said the beetle, talking on the smell, we'll let the cat out of the bag off, ain't. "'Good gracious, put the bag in, and again, it can't be a cat.' "'Bring it on, Paul, Mr. Vickley. I only spoke anatomically. If he comes here, so you'll find the oard smell, comes out of this year opening.'

2:05"'What, an opening, close to my pew, my family pew, where I, every Sunday, enjoy my repose. I mean, my hopes have everlasting glory. Upon my life, I think it's a piece of damned impugnance to open the floor of the church, close to my pew. If there was to me anything of the sort done, couldn't it have been done somewhere among the free sittings I should like to know?" "'Mr. Vickley,' said Sir Richard, pray be satisfied that I have sufficient authority for what I do here. And if I had thought it necessary to take up the flooring of your pew while you had been in it, I should have done it." "'And pray, sir,' said Mr. Vickley, swirling himself out to as large a size as possible, and glancing at his watch chain to see that all the seals hung upon the convexity of his punch as usual, "'Who are you?' "'Oh, dear, oh, dear,' said the beetle, "'convulsions, convulsions! What a thing it is to see authorities are going at each other. Gentlemen, gentlemen, convulsions, aren't there lots of poor people in the world? Don't you be at going at each other?' "'I am a magistrate,' said Sir Richard.

3:08"'And I am an overseer.' "'Ah,' you may be an overseer or an underser if you like. I am going to search the vaults of St. Dunstons.' The church warden now took the overseer aside, and after a while succeeded in calming down his erasibility. "'Oh, well, well,' said Mr. Vickley, authorities his authorities, and if so be as the hoards smell in the church can be got rid of. It is willing as possible. It is often prevented me sleeping. I mean listening to the sermon. And if so be as the hoards smell in the church can be got rid of, I am as willing as possible. It has often prevented me sleeping. I mean listening to the sermon. Your servants, sir, I shall, of course, be very happy to assist you.' The beetle wiped his face with his large yellow hankerchief as he said, "'Now this year is delightful and affecting to see our forties are growing together. Lord, why should a forties snap each other's noses off, and as lots of poor people as can be said anything tell, and done anything tell, and I may snap themselves?' "'Well, well,' added Mr. Vickley, "'I am quite satisfied. Of course, if there's anything disagreeable to be done in the church, and it can be done among the free seats, it's

4:10all the better. And indeed, if the smell in St. Dunstin's could have been kept away from the respectable part of the congregation, I don't know that it would have mattered much.' "'Cut of waltzins,' cried the beetle. And what had mattered at all, gentlemen, but only think of a bishop smelling it. Pulled my life, gentlemen. I did think when I saw a rock-reverned father in God's nose, I was looking up and down, like a cat when she smells a bunch of lights, and noticed it was all owing to the smell of the church. I did think as I could have gone down through the fort, caught hat, and all, and I did. Convolgions that with a moment?' It was,' said the churchwarden. "'Mercy, mercy,' said Mr. Vickley. The beetle was so affected at the remembrance of what had happened at the confirmation that he was forced to blow his nose with an energy that produced a trumpet-like sound in the empty church, and echoed again from nave to gallery. Surritured blunt had let all the discourse go on without paying the least attention to it. He was quietly waiting for the foul vapors that arose from the vaults beneath the church to dissipate a little before he ventured upon exploring them. Now, however, he advanced and spoke.

5:11Gentlemen, I hope I shall be able to rid St. Dunstins of the stunch which for a long time has given it so unenviable a reputation. "'Well, even if you can do that,' said the churchwarden, "'you will delight the whole parish. There's been a puzzle to us all where the stunch would come from.' "'What is the puzzle now?' said Sir Richard Blunt, as he pointed to the opening in the floor of the church from whence issued like a steamy vapour such horrible exhalations. "'Well, I certainly must come from the vaults. But,' said the overseer, the parish book show that there's not been anyone buried in any of the vaults directly beneath the church for thirty years. "'Well, then,' said the beetle, "'it's a very wrong thing of respectable parishioners for, of course, them as has vaults as respectable. To keep quiet for thirty years, I mean, it's thinking about biases, it's not common wrong, convulsions.' Sir Richard Blunt took a paper from his pocket and unfolded it. From this plan, he said that I procured of the vaults of St. Dunstons, it appears that the stone we have raised in which was numbered thirty, disclosed as a stone staircase communicating with two passages from which all the vaults can be reached.

6:15I proposed searching them, and now gentlemen, and you, Mr. Beetle, listen to me. They all three looked at him with surprise as he took another letter from his pocket. "'Here,' he said, are a few words from the Secretary of State. Pray read them, Mr. Vickley. The overseer read, as follows. The Secretary of State presents his compliments to Sir Richard Blunt, and begs to say that as regards the affair at St. Dunstons, Sir Richard is to consider himself armed with any extraordinary powers he may consider necessary. "'Now,' gentlemen, added Sir Richard Blunt, "'if you will descend with me into the vaults, all I require of you is the most profound secrecy with regard to what you may see there. Do you fully understand?' "'Yes,' stammered Mr. Vickley, but I, rather think I, I would as soon not go. Then, Sir, be silent regarding the going of others.' "'Will you go, Sir?' "'To the Churchwarden?' "'Well, yes, I, I think I ought. I should be obliged to go. I may feel the want of a witness. We will take you with us, Mr. Beetle, of course. "'Me, me, convulsions, yes.

7:17Yes, you go, you know, ex-officio. Ex-o-dose, I don't want to go. I can waltzions. Can waltzions. We cannot dispense with your services,' said the Churchwarden. "'If you refuse to go, it will be my duty to lay your conduct before the Vestry. Ah, ah, ah!' Gitter torch,' said Sir Richard Blunt, and I will lower it down the opening in the floor. The air is not so bad as to extinguish the light, it will not be too bad for us to breathe for a short space of time. Most reluctantly, and with terrible misgivings of what might be the result of the frightful adventure into which he was about to be dragged, the Beetle fetched a link from the Vestry. It was lighted, and Sir Richard Blunt, tying a string to it, let it down into the passage beneath the Church. The light was not extinguished, but it burnt feebly, and with but a wane and sickly lustre. "'It will do,' said Sir Richard, "'we can live in that place, although a protracted stay might be fatal. Follow me. I will go first, and I hope we shall not have our trouble only for our pains.'